Reflecting i sit here in chastity, reminiscing on my past, contemplating the decisions i have made, rationalizing some and regretting others.  It is the ones i regret which pierce deep into the soul, humbling the spirit, causing conflict within, creating a helplessness that overwhelms me into a deepening slavishness. Recollections of disobedience consume my mind, no relief, no escape, an affirmation that i am not perfect.  Is it possible for me to make reparation? Are there limits or do i kneel quietly and endure whatever is given to me for my disobedience?   geo

At first, they pleaded for me to be tolerant. I obliged.   Next, they requested that I accept. I acquiesced.   Then, they demanded that I include. But I learned that to include is to convert. I did not want that, so I politely declined.   They insisted, refusing to take No for an answer. I stopped accepting.   They condemned me. I stopped tolerating.

Looking for a connection with someone who hasn't logged in since 2014? Just looking for Friends Only but would love pages and pages of profiles whose last login is 3 years ago, 10 years ago, or more? Don't worry! We at CollarsSpace have you covered too! Just click on "Local Users" and you'll find page after page of profiles that haven't been logged into since 2019, since 2014, since 2010 or even since the first decade of the century! Yes there's profiles not used since 2005 and we'll make sure to disproportionately feature them extra prominently! Oh shucks, you're quite welcome.. But kidding aside folks: It didn't used to be this way until a couple of years ago, when this  started..Before that time, not that many years ago, the Local Users page was not this way, and worked fine. If it's on purpose to "protect people" from getting a huge amount of email the first week then they could just remove the section. Pretty sure that some do not need or want that 'protection' but if that was the goal, then they could remove the section, so seems to be a software issue. No, it's not random dates, either, it changed radically at some point, from a mix of Last Online dates as you'd expect, and mostly not that long ago, to very heavily tilted to like 95 percent of profiles shown (probably more, the exceptions are quite rare) being those that haven't been used for many, many years. Anyone have insight into the minds or intentions of the administrators, or the situation they are in?

I have long been fascinated by the basic concept of "How". How do I develop actual power over a sub. How do I instill a true mindset of submission or devotion. How do I get and keep control/power over a whole person. How do I actually mold someone, train them. How do I create an environment where I can unleash myself. How do I get the results that I desire. One thing I've learned is that people develop a core let's say picture of themselves. They develop this idea of who they are in their head, how does she talk, walk, dress, think, her desires, priorities, perceptions, etc etc. Once we have this image in our head this definition of who we are, our minds will do mental backflips to rationalize anything that might challenge this. There is an incredible inertia against any form of challenge or change. Even if you want to change, even if you want to be someone else, it's climbing a mountain. I have met all too many submissive women who on the face of things are willing to do an endless litany of gross, dirty, rough things. Their minds then go through this incredible process of rationalization and narrative building to square that in a way that doesn't challenge their inner self. They will then balk at something incredibly simple that invades their non submissive compartmentalization. One of the core pillars in my philosophy of dominance is to challenge her conception of herself. If I can subjugate your idea of who you are, I can move the real you in so many possible directions. Real power and dominance is not about how hard I can hit you or making you do the grossest things I can think of, it is about owning the idea of you. Once that is done the possibilities are endless.

Upon His Knees   He kneels upon the plush carpet, time etched in silver at his temples, A devoted servant to her throne of silk and shadow. Her hands, adorned with crimson, guide him gently down, To where her essence calls like honeyed nectar.   With reverence, he parts the petals of her bloom, Tongue tracing ancient patterns of worship and surrender. Each lap a prayer, each flick a testament to his devotion, As she arches above him, goddess of his universe.   Her fingers tangle in his graying hair, a crown of submission, While waves of pleasure ripple through her sovereign form. He drinks eagerly from her chalice, deep and sweet, Lost in the sacred ceremony of flesh and power.   Her thighs, strong and commanding, frame his weathered face, A throne room where his service finds its highest purpose. Her moans are royal decrees that echo through his soul, As he worships at the altar of her divinity.

Messy Little Piggy  Had the best time today rolling around in the bath in piss and custard. Oinking as I poured it all over my head, down over my snout and finishing by rubbing it all over my tits and pussy. Piggy piss play and sploshing, yum, my favourite. What food do you like to wallow and oink in?

Tears Wow… this is such a loaded word for me.  I have such a love hate relationship with these suckers… I am reluctant to even write on the topic.  For starters, being someone who gets migraines, a good solid set of tears, that leads to solid congestion can lead to a migraine, so over all I typically avoid tears if I can help it and I don’t need them.   My brain seems to produce these things at all the wrong times sometimes.  If am super angry… Tears.  Super happy in a nostalgic way… Tears. Super empathetic for someone… Tears. What the heck is with all these tears??? When they come during these high emotion times, I have zero control over them and their timing sucks!  If I don’t’ shut down the emotion can’t shut down the tears that come with it!  Going silent and withdrawing is often the only way to stop them.  This doesn’t help when I am furious and want to be screaming at someone. This doesn’t help when I am trying to watch a wedding.  This really doesn’t help when trying to counsel a friend who is having a hard time.  I need to engage and be there with them! The other side of the coin… and this was to my big brother’s demise growing up… I can sometimes turn on those tears with the flip of a switch.  Not the legit sobbing my heart out stuff usually, but enough to put a pause in the conversation if I am not happy with it.  I must watch my manipulative side with this.   (I have a broken door in my house because I wanted my husband and son to quit fighting one day and turned them on so well, then ran off and locked myself in the bedroom… the two of them quit fighting with each other and came to find me and broke down the bedroom door to check on me… I never expected they would break the door!) The issue is sometime this same thing happens against my will…  I may not be happy with the conversation, but I really DO want to talk it out, and not have those stupid tears affect the outcome… and the stupid things come anyhow because I am emotional!  So frustrating!  Then in my frustration I cry more!  Then get mad that I am crying, and then I cry because I am mad that I am crying, then it seems like I am crying because of the conversation… then all is lost, I can’t have the conversation untainted, and I am just straight up pissed off at myself. None of these tears are tears that bring me emotional relief though.  In fact, they often do the opposite.  They don’t affect my submission, (unless you count my bratting and manipulating with tears, in which case it might actually be bringing me out of my submission.)  There is one type of tear that brings me emotional relief and brings me further into my submission.  Tears from pain.  They are rare though.  Super rare.  I have health issues and I have (well controlled, without the use of narcotics) chronic pain, and medical professionals have put me through hell and back with some of the things they have done to me.  I get cluster headaches occasionally, some of the worst pain on the planet. (Imagine a brain freeze that lasts for 3 hours).  I simply don’t cry from pure pain.  Now, my eyes will water from it, like when your thumb is hit with a hammer, but it is just that, eyes watering, no redness, no sniffling, no sobs or bawling.  Sometimes though, I need to cry.  I need emotional release, and I need it to not be attached to anything like an argument, a friends ups and downs, an emotional event, etc.  I need my own personal release.   Where have I found this?  Complete and total submission, and I have found that in only one place… pain beyond my control.  There are lots of ways to give submission, but they are mostly all ways I still feel I control.  I can do dishes, cook meals, give physical pleasure, do penance like tasks, etc.  They are all things that I do because I am either happy to do or am willing to put up with the annoyance or interruption to my day to do.  That is really how my brain processes such things.  The emotional repentance within the brain is lacking and there certainly isn’t any call to tears over any of it. Physical punishment is different.  I don’t enjoy pain, I am not a pain slut, but there is an absolute difference to pain punishments.  There is constant thought and anticipation.  I don’t’ want to say anxiety because of the negative connotations with the word anxiety, but I don’t want anticipation to be taken as joyful excitement.  The period leading up to physical punishment.  That time between when you have done wrong, and when the punishment is administered… there is a gnawing in the back of your mind.  Driving the car, talking to your vanilla friend on the phone making lunch plans, brushing your teeth, watching TV, getting the mail.  Randomly, at any time.  It pops into your head!  You are reminded you have done wrong.  You are reminded that there will be a price to pay, and not one that will be easily dismissed.  You are reminded that with every ounce of your being, you are going to have to submit yourself to absolute unpleasantness to pay the price for your actions (or lack of actions depending on the situation).  This alone increase the emotional tie to the pain to come. When it is time for the punishment, it isn’t enough to be told to just go off on your own and do something and be done with it.  You must stand before your accuser, look them in the eye, face up to what you have done, admit your guilt, humiliation of the mind as much as the body as you bare your soul before them and present yourself to them, willing to take whatever they are going to give.  Knowing you will soon lose control over your body’s responses to the pain, jerking this way and that way, trying

When my ex and I were exploring BDSM and doing research, I was more attracted to the submissive role for myself. I encouraged her toward taking the Domme role, and I would be her submissive, but she wasn’t interested. I even created a website dedicated to FLR, but she wanted me to be her Dom. But, my core was really very submissive to women. Now that I am single, I am very interested in exploring my submissive side with an amazing Domme. If you would like to see the FLR website I created, it’s    http://amazingflr.byethost8.com

Too many of you are confused — begging to be subs one minute, acting like wannabe Doms the next. All these hidden intentions are getting annoying. I don’t do pissing contests with little boys. Either serve or stay out of my inbox Having a handful of internet subs doesn’t make you a Dom — it just makes you loud online. Real dominance shows in how you carry yourself, not in how many chatroom pets you collect

Woman on fire:   In a world of soft whispers and gentle caress, There exists a woman, fierce and undeterred, With eyes that ignite like fire, she stands defiant, A force of nature, her spirit unyielding.   Her words are sharp, cutting through the silence, Her presence commands attention, demanding respect, She paves her own path with unwavering determination, Unapologetically herself, unafraid to be seen.   In her hands, she holds the power of conviction, A warrior in her own right, unafraid to take a stand, For she knows that her strength lies not in submission, But in the fire that burns within, a beacon of aggression.   So let her be, unbound by societal expectations, For she is a force to be reckoned with, a woman of aggression, Tearing down walls, breaking free from constraints, Unleashing her power, unapologetically fierce.

About to lose control, he sighed in the affirmative when she asked if he needed to use the toilet.   His ankles were unclipped. One wrist was detached from his belt. Sheepishly he allowed himself to be guided to a powder room through the next door.   Completing his business, much relived, he emerged from the room.  He noticed a walk in closet transformed into a cell with a bed and chair. There, hung over the back of the chair were his clothes. It was late, she was no longer amused. Keys were thrust into his free hand. “get dressed Mr. Gimp!”   It was then he realized they had never exchanged names. He wasn’t even sure of the address. Sitting on the bed fully dressed with the keys and restraints on the chair, she took off the hood. A taxi was waiting outside to return him to the Hotel bar.   Her voluptuousness pressed against his face, she pulled him to his feet and kissed him passionately full on his trembling lips. “ Be gone Mr. Gimp!” She patted his butt and pushed him out the door to the waiting taxi. The driver was well paid for his discretion.

After years of being in D/s relationships, I've come to realize that I am just not capable of equality in 'vanilla relationship'. I gave it a shot but discovered how unfulfilled, frustrated and dispirted I became when engaged in a relationship with a partner as 'equals'. Dispite attempting to gravitate away from any D/s aspect within a relationship, my natural instincts and habitual tendencies always found a way to emerge subconsciously without my realization. My inner desire would have me doing things that used to be commonplace as a domestic slave but were highly discouraged during my attempts with 'vanilla relationships'. My therapist believed I subconsciously believe I am not worthy of love, but I disagree entirely. My love for submission, service and dedicating my every waking moment in pursuit of another individual's happiness is love on a different scale. She says that's just obsession and addiction, I told her she didn't know what happiness and life is about. I explained how in my relationships in D/s, happiness is a product of my devotion, loyalty and making my owner's life simpler, less stressful and more fulfilling in all aspaspects, which directly impacts my happiness. Because of this mantra, I compared serveral situations within a D/s relationship compared to a vanilla relationship. I discussed the difference in communication, expectations, and how shared responsibilities can foster underlying resentment. Then as a final point I looked to civilization's history and explained how up until the 1960's, culturally women were expected to be submissive to their men, remain in the home, be seen but not heard, cook, clean, provide sexual pleasure rather than receive it all while putting on a smile and looking good. I explained that in a nutshell, those general principles are some of the basic things I crave in any relationship. I genuinely receive pleasure from making othera happy in any capacity. I then asked her if her husband evokes even a percent of those qualitie.......I told her no response IS a response, thanked her for out final session and exited the room.  So to sum things up, I'm back here again in hope to find someone with similar values, aspirations and ambitions in life. It's always darkest before the light.

Wow   For the first time in a while, I received an email that made me smile. This is what I'm talking bout! The grammar and punctuation were off, but that's ok. The words were honest, sincere, and authentic. Yes, it was poorly crafted, but it was the best thing I read all day!    PEGSTRESS IS PLEASED!

He held up a bottle of bright red nail polish and placed it in front of me. “Your hands give you away,” he said. “If you’re going to commit to this, commit all the way.” I uncapped the bottle, my hands shaking slightly. One careful brushstroke became another. A few mistakes forced me to start over, but gradually each fingernail gleamed with a glossy crimson finish. “Now your toes,” he instructed. I hesitated, then nodded. When I finished, i sat quietly, waiting for the polish to dry. I glanced in the mirror, saw myself in lingerie, make-up, wig and red nails. “How does it feel?” he asked. I turned ny hands over, studying them from every angle. Such a small change, yet somehow it felt surprisingly significant. Every glance reminded me that I crossed another line. He smiled. “Good. You’re beginning to notice the details. Sometimes the smallest changes are the hardest to ignore—and the hardest to forget.”

"life is full of endings that you never know are coming until they already pass"I wrote that quote in high school. Some of us learn and grow and im grateful that many things have been learned. Some answers will never be known for sure from my journey here in this lifetime. A new chapter is starting and perhaps the last chapter . Today i finally got to start moving things to a new home . A home that I feel will be my last but things are never certain and I have learned you have to live in the moment and ride each wave. I feel the shift of energy in the earth but I also know that things must shift so they can heal and balance. My Master Mate and Husband and I have been through many things in these last three years. We have grown and we intend to keep growing together. I have learned about the light and the dark. I have learned about walking paths. I have learned about consequences for actions. I have learned about addiction . I have learned what vanilla mindsets are like and how many of those could just things that are spiritual and misunderstood. I have definitely learned and experienced Dominance and submission through mind body soul spirit and energy. We cant protect people from all pain all we can do is try to guide but some lessons must always be learned by the being. It feels good to write, its been awhile since I sat down and let words flow. There is always new beginnings

By believing that submission must be pursued, to any degree, is to reframe dominance and submission as a typical relationship and its not. Dominance doesnt pursue. Submission doesnt need to be pursued. Submission comes to dominance in this dynamic. It has to. Submission is given, won over even, but the same goes for dominance. As much as she must be convinced by his dominance, he must believe her submission meets his needs or can be molded to do so. What remains is the initial approach, and it is simply ego on the part of the submissive to believe what she offers is more important, more valuable and harder to come by, than what he offers. Consider how many suitors a submissive no doubt has flood her inbox here, how many obvious frauds, bullshit artists, misogynists, egotists etc that she has cast a dismissive eye over. What happens if/when you find one that calls to you? Will you wait in the hope or expectation he will approach, or will you decide to present to him? Of course, this probably explains why the place by my side is empty and I have to fetch my own pipe and slippers. Such is life.

  hope, still Since nineteen I’ve wandered, with stars in my chest, Through years full of aching, through trials and tests. I’ve searched in the silence, in moments I’d cry, And whispered to shadows my tear-threaded why. I’ve given up hope, then lit it anew, Wrote love in the margins, believed it was true. The road has been winding, the nights have been long, But I’ve kept my soul tethered to one quiet song. Today I still listen, my heart open wide, For the one who will see me and stand by my side. Who’ll meet me with presence, and power, and grace, To hold all my parts in their rightful place.   So come now, Daddy, I’ve waited so long— Collar me gently, where I truly belong.

People are fascinating. We are a true mix of talents, experiences, complexities, desires, strengths, weaknesses and hope. Relationships are a balancing act of attraction, relation, commonality, goals and ideals. Kink adds an extra layer of intricacy. I see a dichotomy in many profiles on here: the desire to be seen alongside a desire to be enveloped in a new lifestyle.

  I keep putting off posting here but a few people keep reminding me so here’s a bit of an update on my life.. As my profile and prior journal entry says, I’m owned (full time and live-in) by a couple and part of their household. This position is a lot different than my prior ownership position but I was expecting that. I function as the alpha in the household but I’m inexperienced in that position so it’s been a steep learning curve. They have great faith in me and my potential so who am I to question that? ;) The household is much more steeped in the harder core end of the BDSM spectrum. And by that I mean that it’s not just an occasional role play type thing or the D/s “lifestyle” thing with inane rule lectures or protocols and such. Well, to be fair, my prior ownership situation was similar in that way too but I was also in college at the time so there was a lot of time spent out of the house in the vanilla world. In large part, my decision to take on the position was because it was a more edgy and realistic situation than the more mainstream “lifestyle” stuff I’ve encountered. I suspect this is going to get horribly hacked up here so I'll leave more until later...  

I've absolutely no interest in her sexually but just added someone to Favorites just as a way to bookmark them so I can read her Journal entries. Because we have a few things in common and I may find her writings interesting.   Was considering sending her a 1 or 2 sentence message just to let her know the Favorites means that and only that..but apparently no messages from males are accepted. Which is just as well, since too many on here are unable to see the truth even if it's right in front of them, though I mostly sympathize as many have been burned by the dishonest in the past. Others on the other hand, protest loudly how they hate all the unwanted advances but recoil even more from the encounter with someone who truly has no sexual interest in them but may have interests in common. Which is a bit rich given all the comments one hears about how it's bad form from the other side to only be interested sexually and to lose interest when it's for friendship..pot and kettle.. gander and goose.. On a positive note, life despite its pains and worse, can be very beautiful, so those of you, which is very many, who struggle with depression or holiday stress..please take a few moments or longer to take good care of yourself and remind yourself This Too Will Pass about bad things in your life, and find some moments to enjoy stillness, warm solitude, quiet and inner peace.

Kneeling, he slid her high heel back on to her foot. Cautiously, he raised his eyes and gazed up at her for approval or perhaps his next instruction.   Miraculously, she levitated up off the couch and stood towering above him. His nose level with the hem of her skirt. Pheromones flooded his nostrils.   With authority of command she bent at the waist placing her mouth next to his ear. A throaty whisper poured slowly like honey falling sweet on his brain. “ Follow me out to my car”   Click click click, the heels announced her departure. Heads turned. She wet her lips with her tongue.  Tugging her gloves firmly over her hands, she fastened her jacket and strode through the lobby and out to the parking lot.

My Experience/Play History i have engaged in casual play with 4 mistresses, one session each. Two had no idea what they were doing, and couldn't seem to decide what to do next. Those experiences were deeply unsatisfying. The third apparently had no interest in anything but beating me, which She did with brisk enyed it, but there was nothing else. No training, no rules, no laying the groundwork, no teasing, no nothing. The last was skilled, had a very commanding presence, and went about Her work with energy and direction. Even though it was a brief session, it was quite thrilling. Unfortunately, however, She was all but impossible to communicate with regarding expectations and scheduling and suchlike, and after two weeks of trying to get together again, i gave up. i often regret this. en regret this.   0 loves

Bridget Choses Enslavement   Bridget’s emotions were running wild.  The ride up to Master’s gave her ample time to reflect on this special occasion.  Bridget was to be enslaved today.  Master had often told her that all women secretly wanted to be possessed and owned by a dominant master.  Collared.  Be an enslaved slut.  Bridget had embraced her inner slave and wanted the delicious certainty of being a strong Master’s owned property.  What a glorious feeling to have no need to carry on with the soul killing charade of denying her sexuality, her submission, her needs and desires. Bridget was so sure.  She couldn’t wait for their special ritual.  The ritual was ordered by her Master but she had made adjustments and additions that had delighted Master.  She knew Master treasured her and all of her. He often remarked on her intelligence and how it drove her kink and also drove his passion to be her owner.  Master always said women with a desire for the collar, for enslavement were usually the very intelligent ones.   Before she left home Bridget paid attention in the shower.  Her shaving was meticulous. Her legs, arms, and pussy were smooth as possible. She thrilled at the thought of the way Master would cup her smooth, oiled pussy and run his hand back and forth as she squirmed and moaned. She knew Master loved to lick and kiss her clit.  He also like to use his Hitachi and a soft makeup brush on her.  He’d alternate the vibrator and brush on her clit.  Sometimes he’d just stop and listen to her breathing.  Bridget loved it when he chained her wrists and ankles in his bed and made her come over and over until she screamed.  He’d gag and blindfold her and make her come some more. Master had learned early in their play to put a towel under her.  The wet spot was something to see. Bridget’s enslavement ritual outfit was all white and had been her idea.  Master had suggested adding long white gloves and she agreed with relish.  Once out of the shower, at Master’s direction, she installed two Ben Wa balls in her pussy.  They went in nicely.  When she walked around she could feel them as she moved.  She wondered if walking in heels would accentuate the sensation.  Oh well, she’d find out soon.  Bridget loved Master’s toy collection.  He had a veritable fleet of vibrators including a very useful remote controlled beauty.  Master said he was shopping for an internet controlled vibrator for some long distance fun.  He also had a selection of nipple clamps, some fun and some she feared.  There was a lot more and she was sure the list was growing After carefully pulling on her white stockings and attaching them to her sexy garter she slipped on her skimpy white panties.  A curvy white push up bra completed her underwear.  She had a nice white blouse with a plunging neckline that accentuated her cleavage. Her brief white skirt would expose her slim legs and white stockings.  Finally she slipped on her white high heels with thosecute sexy little ankle straps.  Naturally she added accessories like a string of pearls and a bright red lipstick.  She decided she’d add her fragrance and put on the white gloves when she arrived at Masters. The miles rolled by.  Her heart sang.  She had made her decision.  It felt so right.  All the things she wanted to experience would be hers in a safe and protected place.  Master would help to explore all the dark kinky places she dreamed about.   The highway intersection appeared on her GPS. She had to turn north.   It was time to call Master.  She heard the phone ring.  Her emotions ping ponged.  Master answered with a pleased voice.  She was close.  He could almost sense her.  They both reveled in the joy of anticipation.     Master remarked that he was looking forward to draping her with his new 1/8” stainless steel chain.  Perhaps chaining her breasts with a nice halter.  When he mentioned that he’d like to chain her in Sirik Bridget’s was incredibly turned on.  The thought of the chain running from her collar to the chained wrist manacles and finally ending on the ankle manacles.  Sirik chain bondage allowed movement but served to remind her that she was owned, protected property.  Master loved everything Gorean and spent a lot of time finding ways to practically adapt the mores of Gor to earth.  A significant Gorean notion is that bondage enhances a woman’s beauty.  Bridget agreed but also concluded bondage made her horny as hell. The rural setting, the trees, the quiet appealed to her.  Here’s the driveway.  Turning right and pulling up the long driveway she found herself next to Master’s car and she knew, the beginning of her life changing event was close at hand.  She put her car in park and applied the parkingbreak.  She felt that she also applied a break on her normal, vanilla life.  She would enter the BDSM Sea.  Enter it as one of the more exotic and nuanced denizens.  She would be a slave girl, specifically a Kajira, a Gorean slave.  Bridget and Master had discussed many aspects of enslavement, slave protocols, sexual ownership, and what they each wanted.  She agreed with Master that after all, it was at its heart, an exotic adult game.  They both knew few could play the game, few could accept their role, and few could adhere to the rules and enjoy them with intense satisfaction.  Bridget loved her role and while their private play was so satisfying, she looked forward to their forays into various forms of public play.  Public Play involved exposing part of her BDSM life to the vanilla world.  Bridget always found it surprising.  She couldn’t believe the naughty sense of excitement she felt when she was exposed.  Was it humiliation, she wasn’t sure but it was very kinky indeed. She applied the bright red lipstick.  She loved the color and loved that her Master had told her he loved bright paint on her lips.  He said she was so attractive and luscious and he wanted her lips prominently displayed for him.  Next her fragrance, chosen because it was both understated and exotic.  At last she pulled on the long white gloves that came up to her elbows. Bridget and Master had discussed how she’d wear the long white gloves and he’d hogtie her and use his ball gag.  The picture in her mind of the helpless position always made her wet and horny.  Master had done this before.  Usually he rubbed a rabbit fur all over her body before he pulled her hair and squeezed her tit while he told her how he felt, what he wanted, and what he’d do with her next. As she turned toward the house she found the garage door open and as she had been instructed, she entered the garage and went to the back door leading into Master’s Rec room.  The lighting was subdued but she saw two large shapes draped in thin cloth.  She knew these were their BDSM toys.  Master had built a large cage for her amusement and a sturdy St Andrews cross that would fulfill her desire to be suspended and held helpless. Master had promised to cuff and chain her to the cross.  She knew she’d be naked and looked forward to the way master slipped a gag into her mouth before he applied something to her ass. Usually he forced a silicone bit gag into her mouth before he used his snake whip on her.  She could bite down on the bit and scream at the same time for the serious relief she craved.  Master had assured her she’d receive a serious whipping and perhaps caning that would leave some minor marks.  She wanted the marks.  She wanted to feel his touch afterward.  She wanted all of the things that ownership demanded. She knew Master had plans for an interesting combination Stocks and Spanking Bench.  Bridget had told Master she’d love to be placed in stocks and have her ass molested, pinched, bit, and butt plugged. She wondered if he’d make good on his promise to administer an enema while in the stocks.  Master had a lot of toys and equipment.  He had showed her the enema paraphernalia and it included an interesting flow meter that Master said was important to ensure reasonable flow and comfort.    Climbing the stairs she heard Master’s voice and it made her heart skip a beat.  She loved the way he spoke to her.  He didn’t speak at her rather he spoke with her, sharing his thoughts and sometimes emotions.  Master was sitting in a large black leather chair.  He was wearing his black suit with a black mandarin shirt and a nice red pocket square.  He leaned forward and motioned for her to come up.  He wondered about her trip and if the Ben Wa balls were still in place and how she liked them.  She told him about her journey and, yes, the Ben Wa twins were still in place and had directed her attention at the oddest of times, like stepping on the brakes. He asked her if she was ready, if she wanted to go through with their plans.  Did she really want all the things they had planned for, had discussed.  She knew what he was asking, giving her a graceful out.  Her mind was made up but his trust and care made her even more convinced that she wanted enslavement, wanted slavery, wanted to be an owned woman, Master’s property.  All of their discussions had led to this decision.  They both saw a Master/slave relationship as the purest and incidentally most fun form of a BDSM power exchange.  Both of their roles had been defined in term that made sense to both Bridget answered him by unbuckling her shoe clasps and removing her heels.  Pulling the ribbon from her hair she let it fall loose about her shoulders.  Bridget smiled at her Master and began removing all her clothing.  Finally she stood before her Master totally naked.  Master seemed very pleased. He rose and ran his fingers gently all over Bridget.  Master believed that a Gorean Master took great pride in his Kajira, his slave and should be familiar with every inch of her. Bridget knew that her actually collaring demanded that she be naked. She knelt gracefully before him, raised her arms over her head and crossed her wrists.  Bridget had assumed the Kolar or collar position of a Kajira, a Gorean slave.  She knew the message she was sending was that she was ready to be bound and collared.  Naturally she looked down and waited for Master.  The decision was not only made but by showing her acceptance of their planned bond to her Master she knew it was done.  How happy, how fulfilled.  She almost wanted to cry the emotions were so strong. Her life as a Kajira, a Gorean slave was about to begin.  See accepted that she must always be pleasing and offer perfect obedience. Master formally asked her why she was before him and what were her deepest desires for enslavement.  She continued to look down and at first her voice was a whisper but as she gained confidence she became secure and spoke with a clear steady voice.  She asked to be enslaved.  She pledged to serve Master in all ways.  She would be pleasing at all times with perfect obedience.  She would be the owned possession of Master, subject to his commands, dressing as he directed.  She spoke the words of enslavement, “bind me master”. She spoke the timeless pledge saying she wished to be enslaved and then crossing her wrists in front of her asked that Master bind her.  She felt the ceremonial tying of her wrists with the traditional Gorean yellow bindings.  Master then said he would complete the ceremony, their enslavement ritual, by collaring her.  She felt the collar begin to encircle her throat.  She gasped as he pulled her hair back so he could buckle the collar.  Her formal slave collar was polished metal and had a screw driven locking mechanism.  It would be difficult or next to impossible to remove, not that Bridget would ever think about removing the symbol that encircled her throat.  Master completed fastening her collar.  He took her chin in his hand and remarked on her beauty and suitability to be his Kajira. Master removed the bindings from her wrists and ordered her to stand and had her turn around slowly to display herself. She looked at herself and saw the beautiful collar.  All she could say was “La Kajira, La Kajira”, Gorean for I am a slave. Bridget now understood in a most intimate way that her master treasured her and wanted to enjoy his treasure.  Master had two more things to complete the ritual and the first had Bridget very nervous.  Bridget knew she was to be branded.  Thankfully the branding didn’t call for a real white hot branding iron.  Bridget received a henna dye print representation of the Gorean Kef, a very delicate elaborately beautiful “K”, leaving a sharp red image high on her left thigh.  Next Master spoke her new slave name. When Bridget and Master were together in their new roles, she would be “Sefa”.  Master explained that her new slave name was pronounced SEHF-ah and meant pleasure.  He said she was named that way to remind her how she must always be his pleasure slave.  She didn’t think that would ever be a problem. It was done. Bridget had been collared, branded, and named.   Master said he accepted her as his Kajira.  Master directed her to put on her garter, stockings, panties, and heels.  He snapped a leash onto her collar ring and said “bracelets”.  Bridget immediately put her wrists behind her back, slightly bowed her head, and turned around to receive Master’s manacles. Using the leash and her bound wrists he moved her forward.  Master led her around a bit and then out around the deck. Master often told her that bondage made a woman more beautiful and that served to make her move in a sensuous, elegant manner.  Bridget agreed and could think of nothing better than to be on her knees with her Master’s cock in her mouth. He took her over to a chair by the deck table.  He motioned for her to kneel.  He unclipped the leash and attached a short piece of chain to her collar.  The chain was connected to a d-ring embedded in one of the large deck posts.  Bridget was chained to a post with her wrists bound.  Never before had she felt so at peace.  She was owned.  She had been confined on her Master’s deck.  She felt the chain on her chest.  Bridget’s excitement was mixed with embarrassment and humiliation.  She was on her knees dressed like a tarty slut, out in the open for all the world to see.  She realized that Master was exhibiting her as his prize possession.  Of course she thought, it’s highly unlikely we’ll be disturbed.  We’re out in the woods on a secluded property with foliage all around.  Master laughed and said UPS or FEDEX might show up. Bridget’s life as a slave had begun.  She wished and waited for what was next.  Master said she was to be caged in his slave pen after they had discussed their enslavement ritual.  Master took a plate of fruit and picked up a small piece of melon.  He held it out for her to nibble. She daintily nibbled the fruit.  She was being fed by Master’s hand.  She felt a deep bond and happiness.  Next Master poured some of his cool drink into a small bowel.  He placed it before her and motioned for her to drink.  He was watering his slave, caring for his prize possession.  She knelt before the bowel and lapped at the drink. She felt so humiliated to be made to drink in this fashion but it also was so deliciously kinky.   Her journey had begun.  Life would never be the same.  A calmness, a fullness, a richness had descended on her soul.  Master caressed her cheek and breasts and then checked the manacles.  He also adjusted her collar.  Bridget knew master would always make sure she looked her best.  She was his prize possession. Master leaned back and took a small velvet sack from the side table.  “Nadu” Master commanded and Bridget went into the slave position that had her kneeling with her wrists behind her back. Bridget was fascinated  She knelt with her thighs spread wide, back arched, wrists crossed behind her back.  Master produced a bright red ball gag and told her to open her mouth. Bridget felt the ball pressed tightly into her mouth as Master firmly buckled the gag in place.  She found her hands bound behind her back, and the ball gag reduced her to small whimpers to communicate.  She knew she was vulnerable and totally in the control of her master.  It was delicious.  It made her wet just to think of all the things he would do with her.  The bracelets were gleaming metal and had a short length of chain between them so they were relatively comfortable. Master helped Bridget to stand.  He pulled her panties down to her ankles and helped her bend over. He guided her to lay across his lap and began to stroke and kneed her ass cheeks.  Master remarked that she had a pleasingly plump ass that just begged to be spanked.  Bridget felt her Master applying some kind of oil on her ass cheeks.  She wiggled across his lap into a more comfortable position. It made her feel exposed, controlled, at her Master’s mercy.  Bridget couldn’t believe how excited she felt, how she wanted more, more attention, more control. Master told Bridget that he wanted to assert his ownership, make sure she knew she was his property.  Bridget whimpered her assent. She wanted to be his,begged her master to have her, to make her his own, anyway he wanted.  Just do it now. Master began a slow rhythmic paddling of Bridget’s ass.  Slowly at first but soon faster and harder.  Bridget moaned and gasped. Master paused and asked Bridget if she was his, his property. Bridget thought “yes, yes, yes, have me, have all of me.  I am your Kajira and want to be nothing else”.  Master held up one finger which was the signal for silence Bridget was surprised that Master had shut her up, to be quiet.  She understood that he wanted to be in control.  He told her he felt so completed by their rituals.   Master loved the idea that they had built their own kinky world and Bridget loved the way he ruled it. He could silence her with a command or perhaps a gag.  She loved the delicious excitement when he placed a nice red silicone ball gag in her mouth.  Naturally Master could silence her by imposing speech restrictions and she always complied but the ball gag was so hot. Master reached behind her to the small table by his large leather chair.  Bridget felt his movement and turned her head.  “Oh my” she thought as Master’s hand held the red ball gag, a shiny bright metal butt plug, and a tube of lubrication.  Her heart beat faster as she realized she was in for another anal training session.  

Using a journal entry so I don't have to wait for approval to change my profile.  I'm 50 now and no longer a vegetarian.  I do not have any pets.  I'm no longer looking to move outside of Michigan.  I need to stay here due to the license for my job.  Moving within Michigan might be an option.   Things I'm truly looking for:  an intelligent, service oriented submissive who is between the ages of 40 and 55 and who is both single and available for a long term relationship.   Hard limits:  chastity, cross dressers or sissy maids, pegging, people who try to masturbate to my emails, people who have one main kink and only want that need met, people who don't read my profile, people who expect Barbie with a whip and leather catsuit.    I want to have fun with this again!

I regularly get messages asking me what I consider edge play or what is an "extreme" scene that I have done. A few thoughts on this. First, and most importantly, my adventures are no one else's fapping material. I have met people off this site before, but that is more of an exception than a regularity. Sharing something like a story, which is very intimate, or a scene, is asking a lot right off the bat and is something that no one is entitled to. What is considered edge is going to be different for each of us? I am not here to one-up on someone or compare sausages. What is taboo to me? Having someone viewing another person on camera might not seem hardcore, but having cameras set up 24/7 to view on-demand is.  Going out to dinner may not seem hardcore, but my footing the bill can be edgy. Humiliating play may not be edgy, but when you consider mental health, it can be as sharp as a physical knife edge. If you are not on the same wavelength as I am, you will miss the subtleties of how sharp my edge is. 

I am at a point where I would like a live in. A romantic relationship would be ideal, but a house bitch would be acceptable. I am in the process of purchasing a 3 bedroom home in an affluent part of the south bay area of Los Angeles. It will be fully remodeled and beautifully upgraded in a resort community with many amenities.  I will NOT be supporting you. You will be expected to pay your own way and contribute financially to the household, as if you were a roommate. You should be a working professional with a good income or prove that you have the solid financial means to contribute. I work full time from home M-F, a corporate type job with regular hours. You should keep a compatible schedule or travel frequently. Tell me what you could do to make my life easier and how you could serve, whether personally or within our household. What are your skills? We'd start with a trial period first to assess our compatibility. All other attributes, per my profile, still apply. You must be over 35 and have your life together. I'm not looking to "rescue" anyone with drama, mental illness, substance abuse, or instability in your life. If you can't string together a decent intro, I can't be bothered with replying.  

I am a Cultured creative Sapiosexual Goddess who thrives on stimulating conversation, traveling, hiking, swimming, trail running, working out, kayaking, boating, taking walks on the beach, viewing art, attending comedy events, and soaking up adventurous moments. I live a very active lifestyle without social media, news, alcohol, and mundane things that are designed to shift our focus. I'm the extraordinary experience that your body, mind, soul, and spirit crave! You've found what you've been missing! Are you ready for a different experience?!~~. Or will you cling to what you've been used to and wonder why you keep getting the same results? That's called Insanity! Don't be afraid to try something different. You Will Like It. ~~~Energy is Everything~~~_Be My SubLet's explore Boundaries Of Pleasure~Your credentials, accolades, and worldly materials mean absolutely nothing to me. What does your Energy say? If the vibe is right and you are open to sexually experiencing new things without hangups, we 'might' can embark upon some wonderful adventures together and create memories that last a lifetime. It's sure to be a pleasureful adventure for the both of us.

I have never worn a chastity belt outside of squeezing into one(painfully) for like 30 minutes at most at a time here and there.And I recently found a site that showed me how to measure, and sadly(sadly?!?) to my non-surprise, i'm much too large and need a custom belt.  One that costs $200-300, not the $30-50 belts that seem to be everywhere.And I think back to a recent conversation I had with a Dominant.  That they don't see the point.  That if they tell their slave not to cum, they want and expect their slave not to.  And they wouldn't want them not to.Besides, they want to make use and enjoy the orgasms, so again the belt is unneeded.And having always had to do just that.  I agree.  And I understand.I don't have no particular joy or desire or need for chastity or denial.   I would be very happy having some form of sex and orgasm daily or more just as I would being denied for days or weeks or more.For me, I don't NEED a belt.   But thinking about it, what I NEED is a lack of control.  And the belt can help with that.I was thinking about that today...  How could I explain that idea to someone, and came up with a story of sorts that I see as being a good way of explaining it.Imagine my orgasm is a pile of cookies in the Kitchen.    My owner can say - "don't eat the cookies unless I tell you".  And I could/would obey.   But then again I also could disobey and eat if I see a chance to.(I wouldn't in reality - i'm not bratty like that)   But even though I was told not to, the ultimate power and control of my actions is held by me.   I CHOOSE not to.   I CHOOSE to obey.    Which in and of itself is a powerful thing for the dynamic.   But my thought here goes beyond that.Now imagine a lock on the kitchen door.  That symbolizes the belt.   With a lock, it doesn't matter my choice or decision or even my desire -  I have no choice.   That was removed from me.   The control I had in any way shape or form to obey or not obey is removed from me.And it's that removal of control that the belt can bring.   I would only have a cookie when my owner allowed.   When it pleases them to do so.   And that brings a different dynamic to the relationship.Even if that is one where I eat cookies daily or more even.   I only do so when my owner unlocks the kitchen and allows me to.   Otherwise, like it or not, I wait.   Helpless and not in control.And it's that, that appeals to me about chastity belts more than anything else.   It's like bondage, but a bondage that can be applied 24/7/365.So it has always intreagued me. That, and the fact I can never really fit in one so it's like a teenager desiring beer, the more you're unable to have it, the more you crave the experience of it, at least once. Anyways, just some random musings from my head.   The end result with everything?   Whatever pleases most.   I don't need it, I don't not need it.    The relationship matters more.    I may always wonder how it may be though.   For better or worse.  But I can be happy never trying it just as I could/would being made to live with it 24/7.So like I said, just some random, maybe meaningless musings... thank you for visiting my mind with me this night...

You know the saying, you are what you eat? I heard a variation today I like ever so much better. You are what you digest. Think about it. We, sometimes unwillingly, ingest things that are good for us and reap the nutritious benefits. We also take in those that have spiraling negative effects. And then there's corn. Yes, corn is an antioxidant and contains vitamin C, but for the most part it remains unprocessed and pointless. That's the definition of corn in this moment. Argue with me later about fiber. So, you've got your positive veggies and fruits and grains. You've got your negative chocolate ice cream. You've got corn.  What about when it comes to your words and actions? Are you filling your plate with nutritious positivity? Or are you spiraling negativity about others. About yourself. Your actions. Or is it all just corn? I find, and maybe some of you will feel the same, that I get lost if I don't have a daily agenda. Consider it the plate to put food on. No plate and you just walk around nibbling, not planning out nutrition, not balancing indulgences. I have no plate and no plan and I feel awful. It's all corn and I don't care enough about any of it to make a change. I don't want to have a corn summer. This is my reminder to build a nutritious plate every day so I ingest positivity.  Is this a little too in my head? It went in a different direction that what I was thinking. Originally the connection I made was about taking in the positivity in your surroundings and letting go of anything that doesn't serve you. Drop the corn. Only I seem to have had an epiphany somewhere in there. It could use a little more connection, but hopefully you'll figure it out. By the way, I love corn on the cob. Just not as a neutral state of being.  Someday I'm going to circle back to this philosophy and hashtag drop the corn. You heard it here first. 

Just a thought My dear sublook at you. Lying there so patiently, a good boy eager to please. You know what's coming, don't you? You feel the anticipation, the delicious thrill of expectation. My cock awaits, and so does the sting. Yes, there may be a little discomfort, a little tightness at first. But you understand, don't you? This is necessary. This is how you earn my approval, how you make your Mistress C proud.I will be patient, for a while. I'll let your little hole adjust. I'll feel the warmth of your body as it yields, just slightly. It will be an exquisite dance, a slow burn of pleasure and pain intermingling. There may be tears, little whimpers of protest. But these are merely a testament to the depth of your surrender, the degree to which you are allowing your Mistress to claim you.Every inch will be taken. Every thrust will be felt.I will alternate, exploring each facet of your yielding flesh. This is for your own good, little one.I am both ruthless and gentle – a delicate balance that you are privileged to experience. You will learn to crave the sting, the pressure, the feeling of being completely at my mercy.And then... then the patience will end. The rhythm will quicken, the pace will become furious. I will pound your hole, hard and fast, until you are screaming through that pitiful gag of yours. You will beg for it to stop, but your pleas are just music to our ears.I will take your desperate cries and weave them into our own symphony of dominance.I will show you the true meaning of being owned. I will show you the power of a Mistress's touch. I will show you what it means to truly be mine.  

I've been into BDSM D/s for more years that I care to count. You'd find me to be a bit outdoorsy, I own a boat.. enjoy fishing, being outside and all that offers. At the same time, I consider myself well read.. a CNNaholic. .. (liberal politics, for what that's worth to you).. and I have a well worn library card. As a Dominant, it is among my joys to be able to stimulate a submissive mind.. to help conjure new ideas.. new feelings... I like to be creative. I'm not as much an analyzer, as I am a decision maker. Not that I'm quick to jump to a conclusion.. but.. I'm decisive. I tend to not waiver or vascillate. Over the years, I've considered myself a Master .. a Dominant.. and, sometimes, a Daddy. I like all three, and have learned much about myself. I'd welcome an opportunity to correspond with you about mutual interests.Thanks.

  New Year After a brief discussion this morning we have agreed on a few things to try and get the most out of 2023. wearing my daily collar more often (as permitted by job, etc) more butt plugs less underwear more outfits with access when home more use of the belt more opportunities for us to explore with others Happy New Year!

Miss May's Confessional is now open...   "Do not forgive me Miss May, for I've been a bad boy and I plan to do it again..."   This is a call to all my pervy pals to come forward and entertain me with whatever naughty diversions you've been having, real or imagined. Brag about your recent sexual escapades or confess your impure thoughts (especially regarding me <3 ).  If you're lucky I might be into it too and want to join in on your fun... Seriously, I'm as depraved as you are and your fantasies delight me! And don't worry, my sweets, your kinky confessions are confidential.   On a related note, some of you are mistaken about what the free version of femdom offers. You're here for my entertainment, not the other way around, and you'll get from me what you put in. Be interesting, be open, be willing to figure out how to stroke my ego, and then I'll play with you. I'm not going to coax it out of you either, and expect to have your persistence tested. Don't be too proud to double message me if you think your last message got overlooked. I do make an effort to respond but life does happen.    And finally, thank you to you lovely gentlemen who admire me, check in on me, and wish me well. Your compliments and attention are much appreciated <3   -MM 

Winners and losers can often be distinguished by their propensity to take action and their inclination to serve others. Winners are those who recognize opportunities and are willing to step out of their comfort zones to seize them. They understand that success requires effort, resilience, and a proactive attitude. Winners don't shy away from challenges; they face them head-on and learn from their experiences. Moreover, winners often find fulfillment in helping others achieve their goals, knowing that service enriches both their lives and the lives of those they assist. In contrast, losers tend to be more passive, often waiting for the perfect moment or fearing the risks associated with action. They may have great ideas and potential but lack the drive to bring them to fruition. This hesitation and inertia often lead to missed opportunities and regret. Additionally, a lack of willingness to serve others can limit their growth and connection with the broader community. Ultimately, the difference between winners and losers lies in the willingness to act decisively, persistently pursue their goals, and contribute positively to the lives of others.

FAVORITE TV:  CSPAN, PBS, HTV, GAME SHOWS, HISTORICAL, WAR, SCI-FI, FANTASY, SOUNDSCAPES. ????????????????????????Senate Advances Pete Hegseth????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????????????WHAT???????????????????????????????????? ????????????????????????????????????WHY?????????????????????????????????????? Where is the experience necessary for the job as Defense Secretary - 3 MILLION MILITARY UNDER HIS DIRECTION Someone who holds contempt for federal workers? Taking the jobs from federal works and directing the money to make it great for Corporate America.  Why is Pete Hegseth even being considered for this postion? NO management experience for the manager of 3 million federal workers?  What?  How?  A man who furhter displays a loathing for diplomatic relations with the nations of the world we share.  Secretary of Defense unequipped to understand the necessity of healthy  diplomatic relations in The World.  If that isn't enough, he thinks women should not serve in the military becasue women detract and or are ineffectual, or worse, weakening the military due to the accomodation of women because they bleed...and are  a source of rape.   This is a vulgarly poor arguement for eliminanting representation of the human condition within our military and all of life through the elimination of the female gender.  Just another ATTEMPT TO REMOVE A WOMANS GOVERNANCE OVER HER BODY.  TO DIFFERENTIATE.  TO SEPERATE.  TO ENSLAVE WITHOUT CONSENT. Removing women in the military is NOT on the table. Removing a womans sovernty is NOT on the table.   !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!REMOVE HEGSETH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Let’s stir it up: if pegging the untimate submissive or just kinky play Do you think it’s:• A way to explore masculinity in a new light?• A form of psychological and physical domination?• Just hot ass play and we’re all overthinking it?• Still too taboo for most men to admit they want? For those who get pegged…What really goes through your mind when she straps in and tells you to present yourself? For the the curious guys…What’s stopping you from trying it (or asking for it)? Let’s hear it — the messy truths, the bold takes, the confessions, the horror stories.Is pegging overrated? Underrated? Or secretly the gateway drug to the best sex you’ve never had

Many folks talk about the importance of watching for red flags when searching for a Domme. In truth there are red flags a Domme must watch out for when interacting with a sub. See some below: -Claims they have no limits -Pressures the Dominant into playing in ways that violate their personal limits. -Shows no care or concern for the dominants wants/needs -Insists on playing with no safe word -Only talking to the Dominant when they are horny -Making threats of doing something drastic if the Dominant leaves or does not talk to them -Calling the dominant names or honorifics without their consent  -Insists on playing with you when they barely know anything about you -Demanding money or gifts. If you think of other red flags to add, please let me know. 

I enjoy periodically taking the BDSM Test. Its interesting to track and see how my tastes have changed and evolved over time. == Results from bdsmtest.org: ==100% Dominant 100% Master/Mistress 100% Rigger 100% Sadist 100% Exhibitionist 99% Voyeur 91% Primal (Hunter) 91% Degrader 89% Non-monogamist 87% Brat tamer 86% Experimentalist 81% Owner 35% Vanilla 26% Daddy/Mommy 10% Ageplayer 0% Switch 

It has been ages since I have been on this site so it will take me a bit to get used to the way this is set up. Kink: I am dominant, and am drawn to 24/7 Master/slave relationships with TPE, though I am not opposed to Dominant/submissive dynamics. In my head I think some of my tastes can be a bit extreme, I am well aware after all this time in this community that it is really just a matter of one's perspective, and I am down right vanilla in comparison to some. Other writtings and a more complete fetish list can be found on my FetLife profile. My interests include, but are not limited to: Anal Bimbofication Bathroom control Chastity Enemas Fisting, both vaginal and anal Humiliation Lactation Rimming Rough use S&M Toilet slavery Watersports Health: I get tested between partners, and when I am in poly relationships I get tested when it seems prudent depending on circumstances. I have both varieties of Herpes, and though I have not had an outbreak for over 5 years to the best of my knowledge, this is something potential partners should be aware of.  At my current age of 62 it might not be a surprise the I can have issues from time to time with erectile dysfunction. This is not an issue for me as I have always enjoyed using toys etc. and find a multitude of ways of enjoying myself.  I have for the last 2 1/2 years been dealing with PPPD which makes it seem as if the world is alway rocking 24/7 and leaves me with brain fog among a litany of other side-effaspects.   Other than these delightful tidbits I am healthy and in a shape.

Jesus's love for you is so deep as that of a father and child and so intimate as that of a husband and wife. Jesus and the angels celebrate you turning to him. Like that of a dear friend coming back, more missed than they had realized. Give him your burdens he will sustain you. He will not let the righteous be moved. He is nurturing and practical. He is like a supportive parent, a supportive lover. He is fair, trustworthy, and gives you clarity not impartially but fully. Be fearless and have the courage to pursue a relationship with Jesus Christ. It's a journey, through all the valleys and mountain peaks but he is faithful to never leave you. He carries you. He strengthens you. He cares for you. He sees you. He hears you. Some things happen quickly and some things require time. Perhaps time to build your character. Build your endurance. Build your spirit. Build your patience. Build your wisdom. Some things are not meant to break you but to make you so strong and unrecognizable to your old self. Even in the dark there is a light and the light has not been overcome by the darkness. It cannot be. 

Why we aren't drowning in playmates. Playmate/ submissive playtoy - someone we like enough to interact with, who either comes to provide service, or kink, or some combination of both. I was asked how often I get this. Someone else asked "where are the success stories?" Why I have so many stories about the failures. If we have a fun playmate, that's private, unless they are comfortable having their kinky fun splayed all over the net. I post about the failures, usually in my group, to help future readers figure out what NOT to do. What my limits are and why, and ideally how to avoid fucking up with Dommes in their own searches. Now, the first question - how often? Seldom. And here's why - We have spent a lot of time working on ourselves on many levels for many years, to become better, mentally/emotionally/spiritually healthier human beings in general, which unfortunately has the problematic side effect of causing one to have a lower tolerance for people who haven't done that work. And as was said in Star Trek Next Generation - "the higher, the fewer." The more you level yourself up, the higher the standards you try to live by, the better the human being you try to be, the fewer people you will be able to be around. The fewer people will be tolerable. The fewer people will be able to understand you when you talk about anything more than the weather. The more you work on yourself, the more alone you will be. Then again, the more you work on yourself, the more you will like your own company, and the more you will prefer being alone to being with the wrong people. People who aren't automatically honest, who don't work toward direct, open communication as the default, people who don't make every effort to say only what they mean, and stick to what they do say, people who don't self-analyze and self-correct and so on. People who can't or won't set healthy boundaries. And so on. All of these things create practical problems, (lying, STDs, flaking, anger issues, failure to respect limits or requirements, etc) as well as emotional stress. All of these things impact consent, safety, and trust. All of these things are solely under the control of the individual, and while we can set the boundary that we won't engage in interactions with them unless they commit to them, the average person isn't actually interested in or concerned with being a better person beyond lip service, or even to getting their kink on enough to make the work worth it for them, even if it would make their entire lives better in the long run. It's almost impossible to have real conversation with people like that, too. We just don't seem to speak the same language anymore, and we get people telling us how we are "taking (ourselves) too seriously" or accusing us of being stuck up and putting on airs. The reality is that we just don't want to deal with the problems that dysfunctional people bring with them anymore. And if we never find another really awesome people to play with because of that, we still come out ahead, because we won't have trash people fucking up our lives. Not to put too fine a point on it.

AcadaMay CFNM End Of Year Ball - Saturday 6th December - Applications now open The AcadaMay CFNM Ball celebrates female empowerment through elegance, confidence, control, and connection in a respectful, sensual, and beautifully refined setting, but all dynamics of BDSM are welcome to attend. It is open to everybody, whether Dominant, sub, switch, kinky or just plain curious! Couples, single ladies, single gentlemen are all welcome. Step into an evening of elegance and intrigue at the Enchanting AcdaMay CFNM Ball where sophistication meets sensuality. Set in a stunning large and comfortable dungeon in North London this inclusive gathering invites guests to engage their sartorial splendour and immerse themselves in an unforgettable experience. This fantastic venue is fully equipped with all sorts of interesting equipment on two floors; St Andrew’s Crosses, Spanking Benches, Schoolroom, Medical Play Chairs, Queening Chairs and comfortable sofas and Chesterfields for relaxation and socialising. There is even a curtained 4 poster bed for those who may wish to have a private or public moment - a little voyeurism never did anybody any harm! The evening starts at 9pm and I would ask you to arrive promptly so we can get the party started and not waste any valuable time so that we can get stuck into the evenings events. In the interest of privacy and security I will send attendees the exact address nearer the time. Bring your favourite tipple which the naked waiters will serve to you during the course of the evening, and of course, your favourite selection of toys for your debauched use throughout the evening. CFNM (clothed female, naked man) males and CMNW (clothed men, naked woman) females are invited to attend in white shirt collar, black bow, white wrist cuffs, black dress socks and black polished shoes, otherwise you will be naked.  You will be expected to serve the other guests upon request. The dress code for gentlemen is black tie followed by fetish attire for the commencement of play. The dress code for ladies will be LBD and heels for the cocktail hour followed by fetish attire for the ensuing decadence. Whether you're a seasoned attendee or new to the scene, the Ball promises laughter, conversation, and connection among like-minded individuals who appreciate charm, class, and decorum and most of all, plenty of BDSM! With limited availability and high demand, we encourage early application to ensure your place at this exclusive affair. Come celebrate freedom, elegance, and community in one truly extraordinary evening.  If you wish to attend please do email for further details of how to reserve your place. email:acadamayevents@gmail.com Website: acadamay.com under CFNM

So, recently I did a photo shoot for something I am doing in a few months, I kinda wish I had waited for this as I want to lose more weight as I feel like I am still unattractive in my current state, but I had limited time to submit the required photo... grrr... it's been a few decades since I've done a professional photo shoot, or any modeling for that matter, it was fun, and I may have to do it again soon... the photo I just uploaded and hopefully gets past the bs approval process soon was one of the ones I really liked from the shoot... but not the one I used for my upcoming bid for a title... however, I will say it's been a confidence boost to see these pics and realize the progress my working out has been... it still amazes me the things I have accomplished and the direction I am headed! currently I am hovering somewhere between the 225 - 230 weight range... my ultimate goal is to get back to the 160 -170 range... in the last year and a half I have gone from a 46 waist to a 36, I have gone from walking 5 feet and being exhausted to jogging for 2 minuets on the treadmill at a pace almost twice my normal walking pace and feeling ready for more when done... so yes the hovering bothers me, but no it doesn't at the same time.  I know I'll never be the 130 pound toned build I had into my mid thirties, but I also wont have the unhealthy habits I had that lead to the state I was/am in now either, so I can actually live with that! 3 things that hurt me, 1 smoking, 2 poor diet, 3 the heart failure diagnosis... 3 things I changed: 1 the last 4 years smoke free, 2 a healthier diet I actually follow, 3 I may not win the war, but the battle with the heart failure has been interesting... and I am winning, just like with my weight loss, not at the pace I want lol 

I was asked about the history of M/s in the U.S. so I put together this paper for my class that I teach. As many of you know, I teach classes about our lifestyle. Consensual Master/slave (M/s) relationships form a distinctive branch of the larger BDSM world, built on explicit consent and mutual trust rather than coercion. Though the language echoes the United States’ painful legacy of slavery, within this context “slave” refers to a self-chosen role in which adults negotiate the terms of authority, service, and the freedom to leave at any time. Tracing the history of these relationships reveals a story of gradual emergence from secrecy to visibility and of a community that continually refines its ethical principles. Long before the term BDSM existed, underground currents of erotic power exchange ran through American life. In the nineteenth century, small “flagellation societies” and clandestine magazines catered to people fascinated by ritualized dominance and discipline. Early-twentieth-century fetish photography and private clubs in cities like New York and Chicago hinted at a subculture that could not yet show itself openly, constrained by strict obscenity laws and the threat of arrest. After World War II, a more public foundation appeared. Returning veterans formed motorcycle clubs and gay leather bars, creating what became known as leather culture. These spaces celebrated hierarchy, uniforms, and protocol—values familiar to men who had served in the military and who now sought camaraderie and structured erotic play. San Francisco’s South of Market district, Chicago’s Gold Coast bar, and New York’s Greenwich Village all nurtured this emerging aesthetic. While not every leather relationship was explicitly Master/slave, the emphasis on ritual service and clearly defined roles foreshadowed the dynamics to come. The social upheavals of the 1960s and 1970s brought the first real stirrings of public organization. In 1971 the Eulenspiegel Society, or TES, was founded in New York as an educational and social group for people interested in consensual BDSM. TES meetings offered a rare safe space to discuss negotiation, service, and authority exchange. At the same time the gay liberation movement and the post-Stonewall push for visibility encouraged practitioners to speak more openly, while feminist debates over sexuality and power sharpened the community’s thinking about agency and consent. It was during this era that the term “Master/slave” began to be used more deliberately to describe ongoing power-exchange relationships rather than isolated encounters. Through the 1980s and 1990s the community expanded and codified its ethics. The principles of “Safe, Sane, and Consensual” became a rallying cry, soon joined by the idea of “Risk-Aware Consensual Kink,” which acknowledged that all play carries some danger if undertaken without careful negotiation. National gatherings such as Living in Leather and organizations like the National Leather Association connected practitioners across genders and orientations. Amid the HIV/AIDS crisis, leather and M/s groups became hubs of health education and mutual support. Competitions such as International Mr. Leather made formal presentations of Master/slave relationships more visible, and writers like Guy Baldwin explored the psychology of dominance and submission in influential essays and books. The arrival of the internet around the turn of the millennium transformed everything again. Email lists, online forums, and later social networks such as FetLife allowed people in small towns or conservative regions to find community, share protocols, and even post detailed M/s contracts. Education went global as conferences could draw participants from every region. Meanwhile, mainstream attention—from documentaries to the runaway success of Fifty Shades of Grey—brought BDSM into living rooms and office break rooms, if often in sensational or inaccurate ways. Academic researchers began publishing peer-reviewed studies that showed consensual power exchange could be compatible with psychological health and relationship satisfaction. Today’s M/s community in the United States is strikingly diverse. Participants span every gender, orientation, and cultural background. Annual gatherings such as the Master/slave Conference in Washington, D.C., offer advanced classes on negotiation, long-term dynamics, and the philosophy of service and ownership. Many households create written agreements spelling out duties, limits, and the right to revoke consent, underscoring that autonomy remains central even within total-power dynamics. Yet the term “slave” still prompts careful reflection. Some prefer alternatives like “property” or “servant,” while others reclaim the word as a conscious statement of agency. This ongoing conversation shows how the community remains attentive to the country’s history of chattel slavery and the need for language that honors both freedom and responsibility.  From clandestine nineteenth-century societies to today’s internet-connected conferences, the evolution of consensual Master/slave relationships in the United States is a story of people turning hierarchy into intimacy. Over more than a century, practitioners have built a culture grounded in negotiation, education, and mutual respect. Far from re-enacting oppression, these relationships transform the language of mastery and service into a chosen path of trust, discipline, and personal liberation.

This morning I saw the following on a profile from a heterosexual dom who has a wickledly fun screen name that gets my attention every time I see it. He asks,  "What can a straight male Dom do for a male slave? I am at a loss as to what I can do for male subs and slaves and why they look at my profile when I say no men?" So, I thought I would answer this. For the most simple response, speaking on behalf of all the kinky gays, someone with a great screen name like "IAMTHEBESTMASTER", or similar, makes one look no matter what they have between their legs. Second, sometimes a profile just slips through with the "couple" selection and/or even states sub males on the interest choices. Finally, speaking for me and I assume a select group of kinky gays, this is not about sex for me. I am driven by masculinity and, on my sub side, authority. Having a straight dom take control and train me like a naked employee where the need to please and be pleased is not based on sexual attraction is quite hot and will make me a better man all the way around. Also, it's just fun to look at what you can't have sometimes. So, there is my response.

I am currently seeking to add two new members to our House, one male and one female. The male candidate would ideally have a military background, but this is not a requirement. These will be live-in positions that require a full commitment. Currently, our House consists of myself (the Master) and two female slaves, and we are looking to expand to three active members, including one male.If you are interested in a true 24/7 live-in position where multiple members live and work together towards a shared goal, please email us for more information. The requirements to join are, able to drive, and open to learning a new way of life, both in the M/s lifestyle and in general.As the Master of the House, I consider myself to be straight, articulate, cultured, and a deep thinker. I value self-respect, honesty, integrity, and principles. I seek to dominate completely, both physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. My goal is to bring out the best in my property through intense training and development, while also fostering trust, obedience, and loyalty.This is not a role-playing or fetish-satisfying opportunity, it's a lifestyle that I live 24/7. I am not interested in subs who want to "top from the bottom" or those who are seeking a short-term commitment. If you are interested in total power exchange, authority transfer, good training, discipline, attention, and leadership, please contact us. However, if you have contacted multiple houses and stopped after a few emails, this may not be the right fit for you. MasterG

Chickens and eggs, carts before horsesBigSigh .. 1st visit, Excellent.  2nd, smh .. Idk which was more detrimental,The combo of miscommunication and misrepresentationor My own error in not insisting on sticking to My original plan anywayBut was led to believe it would be integrated ..  however, wasnt .Then today a previously hidden but suspected piece of the puzzle was revealed, and now the whole pictures clearer, but lost much of its allure.. Shame, bc the issues wouldnt have been issues if theyd just been discussed, and or handled better. Wish it all had been .. ah well.. smh .. hindsight sux Only bright side Im capable of coming up with atm is; they keep weeding themselves out quick as spit 

The grass is greener on the other side. Met someone normal from this site. Both very busy working professionals but seem to be orbiting which is not a bad thing just waiting to align a little. Meeting someone normal makes you look at this site a little differently. Your not dissappointed by the odd time waster because your time has no longer been wasted. Your hopeful about a possible relationship now being closer to one that might have some sort of functionality in a modern busy working professionals relationship. Makes you not want to advertise your vexes with the site but merely observe and let not affect you anymore.   - The grass is greener on the other side.

Things have changed yet AGAIN! My father has declined to the point , that he is afraid to move  in with me.  I structured my whole life around this. Closed my business, left my condo, friends, clients, swing dance community, and support network, plus my Sir.   I didn't pick this place for job opportunities,  I was going to care for my father until the end.  He backed out of coming twice and then let it slip that they, my niece, her failing husband and my father were moving 15 hours away!  I may never see him again!   My world has turned upside down.   Now I'm scrambling to get reciprocity for my license, sending out reaumes, and praying to secure employment. Starting over yet again. The one good thing out of this, is the bathroom in the cottage, is completely renovated.  It is stunning , just gorgeous! Porcelain tiled shower , elegant grab bars, not clinical looking at all, all metal shower fixtures, top quality, new toilet, new sink, beautiful oval mirror and lights.  When renovating, when the wall was stripped down, we even found a window!  I prepped the bedroom, learned to skim coat, scraped  sanded, and primed it. I found gorgeous furniture for the parlor, a large couch, chair and a half and a darling tiny gingham print wing chair. A gas operated cast iron stove  stove is in place and hooked up. Now I need to finish the kitchen.  I stripped the wall paper boarders, several of them. Then came across a metal seam! Uuuugh!  Put one layer of skim coating and need to sand that down. Another one or two more coats , then I sand and paint.   At this point I haven't decided whether I'll do my esthetic business or a small daycare out of the cottage.  Either way, I need a part time job before I decide, and complete it. I landscaped the front of it, and it looks darling.   The covered screenedin front porch has two Amish gliders. I saw my dad in those, rocking outside , safe and comfortable. Siiiiigh. Anyhoo, I need to push forward, live in the now for a bit.   My Sir has been out , and his next time is on my birthday. Hopefully all will go smoothly this time. Last time work took two of our days together 💩💩. Miss him being around the corner. I can't believe it's been over two years!    

Among the minority within the class of submissives to whom slavehood is a vocation and slavery the ultimate goal, many are happily collared. Many, many more, however, are not. They are still waiting for their One, the master or mistress to whom they can give their lives completely, their submission totally, and their consent unconditionally. Commendable though this patience might be, the waiting can appear more than just a little frustrating at times. What does one do when every fibre of one's being is screaming for submission, while one has not yet found the person to whom such total submission seems right and natural? If you belong in this group, or if you are simply biding your time for any one of many perfectly legitimate reasons, there is in fact something you can do. You can spend the waiting time "preparing" yourself. Note the quotation marks, however. There is a distinction here that is vitally important to make. You are not doing this for "the One to come", you are doing it for you. Why? Because if you do it for "the One to come" you run the very real risk of ending up worshipping an idol of your own creation with which no dominant, no matter how good, stands a snowball's chance in hell of competing. Instead of preparing yourself for "the One to come", consider it improving your own marketability. Most of it is a matter of common sense. You probably already know what dominants generally tend to look for. Some of it you'll have down pat. Ignore that and get the other areas up to specs, then work on improving the whole. 

If all You're doing is collecting pics, just ask. i'm an exhibitionist and happy to send You non-identifying images that You can use as wank fodder or whatever You do with them. If You want to mock and humiliate me because of my physical attributes, that's fine too --- i'm an emotional as well as a physical masochist.  What i don't appreciate is somebody who leads me on and gets me hopeful that i may have found somebody who's serious about developing a true M/s or D/s relationship and who, after messaging back and forth and me sending pics, disappears, erases their profile and whom i never hear from again. That's both rude and cruel.  Thank You.

MY "ACTIVELY SEEKING" SECTION SHOULD ALSO INCLUDE: SEEKING CROSSDRESSERS

Boy Speak Boy speak is what he really means when he says one thing but means another, Thinking that he is talking to his mind-reading  mother! But I think I want to say you are a prude, Means he wants his ass fucked and will be rude, Why not Goddess do that for me, Means be my dispensing unit I can see. Go on I will do the kink you want, Means no he won't it's just a taunt. Sure I want to meet but tell me now, How you'll have me cum but I won't bow. Nor will I meet or be respectful at your feet,  Says he. So a kinky twat bottom he will remain you see.     My answer is: No fetish service the dommes4U was never set, Never made active I see you lament. Lament at your loss for a second at a time, When I moved on relieved you won't be Mine.   A Dominant Woman am I to be taken on meals and fun days out, To laugh together while you Mine will happily move about, Being useful funny and sweet. That's is the real-time Slave I want at My feet.   What's that you can't cope if I am Poly, As you want a porn image Mistress-dolly. Silly boy with that boyspeak of yours pouring out, I moved on more men worth my time to chat about.

not to complain, but I'm gonna... you see, my mean evil hateful trainer took away my sugar... it's been a week of no sweet tea, sugar in the coffee, no donuts, sodas, cookies or even worse, no ice cream (who the hell does he think he is???)!!!!  honestly, except for the no ice cream thing, I am taking it pretty well... I mean, no one has died... yet...  the IGRA Royalty Competition is coming up fast, October will be here before I know it, just a few (60) more pounds to lose to my goal weight, and a few more inches to shave off the gut and waist, I'm getting there slower than I wanted but getting there... I am almost ready, just a few things left to sort out...  I still want ice cream... (are you sure this isn't "cruel and unusual punishment"?)

I will eventually complete my profile but as it requires approval for every change I will do it once when I know exactly what I want in it.   In the meantime I will add a bit about myself through this journal.  I am 57yr straight male living in Surrey. Personality is natural Dominant but not really in a heavy bondage way, I am more what you would call controlling. There is nothing wrong with those who like pain inflicted on them and I do feel strongly about HOH head of household where the Dominant partner will discipline there significant submissive partner been by some agreed form of punishment. What I am trying to get across is that when needed I can deliver a spanking but it is not something I do to gain any form of pleasure. If anything I would much rather decide what one wears for me especially if we going out. One thing for sure I do appreciate lovely bright red nails For now I am here just to make friends and chat, if we get along over a period them we can take it from there. I will add some updates again soon, as the photo issue I will add to a message if and when we chat, once I have myself organised and update my profile I will attach them there but for the time been they can come with messages.

FEEL MY CONTROL Need me to rub your belly???? Feel the warmth of my lip and gentle flow of my breath As I softly kiss around your naval My breast slide over your penis. You feel the warmth of my breath It's hard and pulsating   I can  feel it throbbing Tell me that you want me I stand and allow you to undress me I push you back on the bed Leaning over you, looking into your eyes, I place a kiss on your head So nice and hard I must taste Pulsating in my mouth Leaking a juice so sweet I crawl on the bed and pull you on top of me and tell you Put it inside me now!!! I am so aroused I cum quickly Working on my next explosion Grabbing you and pulling you deeper inside me I am taking every inch of you My breast are bouncing And you gentle hold them down as you suck pull and bite my nipples I tell you not to move I just want to feel myself grinding on you I cum again So nice and hot as it squirts all over us both I slap your ass and tell you fuck me hard We repo to a scissor position My knee bent to my face as you lean in for leverage I rub my clit as you are pounding my pussy I cum again I tell you to take your cock out and rub my juices around my pussy and ass I make you stand and I suck my juices off your cock and balls I play with your cock rubbing sucking and stroking. Massaging your balls, so very hard You moan and you want to grab my head and I tell you not to touch Edging you and then easing off I slow the licking and sucking down You have some much sweet juice just leaking I allow drops on my breast I rub the head over my nipples covering my breast with your juice I think shall I let you cum?   You say oh yes mistress please let me Are you going to be my good boy I do what you ask......ma'am please I turn and get on all four and tell you I want you to cum in my ass You enter very slow and gentle We get into an intense rhythm I can feel all of you I tell you to tell me what you want I want to cum in your ass Tell me again I want to cum deep in your beautiful black ass Harder and faster Baby make me feel it!! You know I am fixing to explode as you feel my body tremble Are you going to cum with me Oh yes mistress may I Oh yes we erupt together All nice hot and sweaty As I allow you to just relax on top of me and let your juices drain in me I then tell you to come lay beside me As you lay beside I rub him slowly until he falls asleep Are you nice and relaxed my pet........WOW  

I LOATHE setting up WordPress.  I mean.. .GAAHHH! I miss doing things via .html where I had control over what went where, and how things looked. Yes, it was a LOT of work doing things like forms, sidebars, etc, but at least it went where I wanted it I still have to get dominaangeldmort dot com back on it's own space, but for now, at least the page is back up, parked on my angeldmort domain, and I have the podcast started, sort of The first run through is up, and it does play, although I think I need to re-record it, so it doesn't sound so... flat?  and I can't figure out how to put the subscribe or donate buttons on there, etc The link is up on my fet group, if anyone wants to have a look It's called Why You Can't Find a Dominant Woman If anyone is good with WordPress, or web design in general, feel free to offer some advice It's a start.

On the twelfth day of Kinkmas my true sub got from me:Twelve spankers spankingEleven croppers croppingTen paddlers paddlingNine caners caningEight maids a milkingSeven floggers floggingSix whippers whippingFive Ben Wa ballsFour anal beadsThree stuffed holesTwo nipple clampsAnd a red butt over my knee.

Dom Top vs Sub Bottom: Understanding BDSM Role Dynamics In BDSM and kink dynamics, two sets of terms frequently get mixed up: top vs bottom and dom vs sub. Although they often overlap, they actually describe very different aspaspects of a scene. Understanding the distinction between physical roles and power roles is essential for clear communication, negotiation, and consent. Top vs Bottom – Physical Roles “Top” and “bottom” describe what each person physically does during a scene. The top is the person performing the action — tying, spanking, stimulating, penetrating, or delivering sensation. They are the active participant. The bottom is the one receiving those actions or sensations — being tied, spanked, stimulated, or penetrated. These terms define action, not authority. A top may be physically active while following instructions, and a bottom may be physically passive yet maintain control over what happens. People often switch between these roles depending on mood, partner, or scene, which is why “switch” or “versatile” is a common identity in the kink community. Dom vs Sub – Power Roles “Dom” (dominant) and “sub” (submissive) refer to control and authority within a dynamic. The dominant holds power, gives directions, makes decisions, and leads the structure of the scene or relationship. Their role is rooted in authority, not necessarily physical activity.

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I seek a Gentleman Being a Gentleman: Today, being a gentleman is a matter of choice. It is a title you earn through an unwavering commitment to invest in your character. It is not about perfection, but a constantly renewed pursuit of excellence.  Gentlemen are not stiff, pretentious, or focused on elevating themselves. Instead, they strive to succeed while helping those around them succeed as well.  Being a gentleman means that you care about how your choices impact others. It is about human connection. At a recent professional event, I was introduced to a man who dressed impeccably and had been working the room like a pro. His handshake was appropriate, and our initial conversation was pleasant, but he quickly became boastful, stopped listening, and seemed unaware of the people around him. Before my eyes, he transformed from a gentleman into a banty rooster—all puff and little substance. Sadly, he was unable to connect in a meaningful way. Our world is in desperate need of more gentlemen. Those who choose to pick up this torch are not only performing a noble feat, but they also reap incredible rewards. The qualities of a gentleman never go out-of-style and pay huge dividends. Qualities of a gentleman:     Generous A gentleman is generous with his time, wisdom, and resources. He looks for ways to help others. He is a servant leader, and his commitment to interpersonal kindness creates a positive culture that boosts commitment, engagement, and performance.     Positive A gentleman chooses to be positive. His positivity is contagious, and his consistent encouragement draws others to him. He practices gratitude, which research shows lowers his blood pressure, improves immune function, reduces stress hormones, and facilitates better sleep.     Lifelong Learner A gentleman maintains a teachable posture and actively seeks new challenges. His intellectual curiosity propels him to constantly better himself and his craft through reading, coaching, ongoing education, and time spent with mentors. He turns off the T.V. and silences his phone to make time for this investment. He is emotionally mature, mentally sharp, informed, and not ashamed to ask for help.     Civil A gentleman embraces civility by valuing all people and treating everyone with respect. From the janitor to the CEO, he carefully considers how his behavior and words impact others. He treats females and males with the same respect.      Well-Mannered A gentleman is well-mannered, and can effortlessly navigate social and professional settings with confidence and proficiency. He stays abreast of current etiquette guidelines, and uses social acumen to navigate shifting norms. As a result, he is as comfortable at a casual gathering with friends as he is in the boardroom. He returns his shopping cart, says “please” and “thank you,” holds doors open for others, tips generously, and smiles often.     Hard & Smart Worker A gentleman possesses a strong work ethic.  He takes great pride in his work and strives to give his very best every day. He is reliable, dedicated, self-disciplined, humble, and a team player. He leads and is led well. People want him on their team.     Sharp Appearance A gentleman understands the power of his appearance—that the way he chooses to dress, groom, and carry himself is either a bridge or a barrier to his success because what people see, is what they expect. He takes no days off from excellence, and his consistently sharp appearance demonstrates respect for himself and his environment, wherever he may be. He conducts an annual image audit to ensure that his appearance is up-to-date and supports his goals.     Effective Communicator A gentleman is well-spoken and a focused listener. He demonstrates conversational competence and leaves others feeling inspired, engaged, and understood. He manages his tone and body language to maximize connection. He knows that hearing is a passive physical process, but listening is an active mental process that requires work. As a result, he strives to really listen to what people have to say while also effectively communicating his point of view.     Confident A gentleman is confident in that he knows the value of what he brings to the table. He seeks competence, not perfection. His body language and commanding personal presence identify him as a leader. He stands upright, walks with purpose, avoids hiding his hands in his pockets, and extends a firm handshake.     Person of Integrity A gentleman does the right thing even when no one is watching. He is a man of his word, and is not swayed by peer pressure or popular opinion. The man he is at work is the same person you will encounter in the community and at his home. Ask yourself: How do you want to be remembered?