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Looking4boy2own

Looking4boy2own

Looking4boy2own - photo 1
Looking4boy2own - photo 3
Looking4boy2own - photo 5

Friends:

SEEKING A BOY BETWEEN THE AGES OF 18 TO 40 TO TAKE ON AS A SUB OR SLAVE.

I want a boy that knows and accepts that he will be kept locked in collar and chastity, as well as diapered 24-7. Despite being diapered, boy IS NOT a baby, just kept diapered for humiliation! he knows and accepts that he will be used sexually, and that he is property of his owner. he will have daily chores and responsibilities, and will be rewarded for good behavior, and punished for bad.

I HATE to have to include this bit but:

  • SERIOUS ONLY NO MORE FUCKING GAMES!
  • Don’t bother if you’re just looking to get your jollies… I’m not gonna feed your fantasy…
  • PLEASE respect my age limits, I have my reasons for them
  • NO, I WILL NOT BE SHARING MY BOY OR OUR ACTIVITIES WITH MY FRIENDS…
  • ALSO, if you cannot or are not willing to relocate, don’t bother… It’s annoying and discouraging to get …I wish we were closer…messages
  • Cross dressing and sissies do NOTHING for me… not interested…
  • If you’re not interested, politely say so, I will understand… blocking for no reason is childish…
  • No married, couples, open relationships etc..
  • NO DRUGS

Okay that being said, I will never neglect, abuse, harm, mistreat, intentionally cause bodily injury, mame, dismember, or otherwise cause distress to my boy. I am strict but fair, all I really ask is that the boy does as told and follows the rules.

Boy will be used for domestic service, chores and such, as well as sexual usage, I would also prefer to use him as a urinal from time to time…

A better explanation of how my appointment went:

So my previous echocardiogram results were interpreted at under 20, my cardiologist said that he interpreted them differently at around 35 which is obviously better but carries a 50% fatality rate with in 5 years if left untreated, there’s a muscle that’s supposed to meet another muscle when pumping and it’s not doing that. (probably the same mischievous fucker that started all this…) 

Doc then showed me that vs one from 2021, and the difference was OBVIOUS so a few tweaks to the diet, a bit more meds and a couple changes in the exercise routines and I should be good by my next appointment in October he believes…

cardiology follow up this morning, doc says I'm doing okay, function closer to 35% than 20... so I assume that's good... I mean I know it is but still ugh... he says with all these lovely new meds (5 I think... maybe more) I should be much more improved with in 6 months... only time will tell


sometimes I just feel like giving up cause I feel like it's hopeless, I've lost friends and a boyfriend to this fucking condition and it does take a toll, it's not just physically painful and exhausting it's mentally as well... however my desire to beat this is greater than my ability to resign so I think I'll torment this mud ball for a few decades more...

First I'd like to say thank you to everyonw who has messaged me offering support and sympathies over my recent health decline, it's been very helpful to feel the support and encouragement!


I have an appointment in a few days with cardio, so hoping for better results when I go in then ... 


on the other hand, the shop is going well we have 24 listings on ebay currently and we're excited to keep adding to those listings


I do have to say, I hate having this heat failure, I hate days like today when I am so congested and have no energy, I hate when I feel weak, but it makes me appreciate the good days so much more! Take nothing for granted and enjoy life with good vibes!!!!

one word: DEVISTATED!

my recent Echocardiogram came back worse than expected I went down the slope as opposed to climbing... I'm wrecked and not happy about it, understandably... It's almost back to where it was when the condition was caught and I was hospitalized... so NOT GOOD !!!


it feels like all the work I have done has been for nothing and I feel defeated... having a terminal condition sucks...


Some good news though, looks like my record shop will be a reality sooner than later, I got all my LLC etc filed and done so, look at me trying this adulting thing! lol This I am excited about!



I don't feel 49... 

Been a while, lots going on! Some really exciting prospaspects coming up so ready to see where this path goes!

 

on the journey, I'm down under 220... I feel infinitely stronger than I was before and I think I'm going to just have to keep this up! lol I set a new personal record on snatches at 165 for 3 reps! I don't think I could lift that over my head even when I was younger and in good shape so yay!

 

on the search for the right boy... well let's just say flakes abound and I'm almost over it... oh well...

 

 

on an extremely personal level i had something I never expected to happen happen to me (advice appreciated)... I spent 16 years wondering who my birth father was, 3(ish) months trying to build a bridge between us, and 32 years trying to forget... a little over 2 months ago he reached out to me (first time ever) three weeks ago it was "hey really wanna meet with you, just say when and where and I'll be there..." so I told him Monday 1pm at my bar...  *crickets* 

I haven't reached out or anything but I really wanna be petty and post how I feel while tagging him since he reached out to me via facebook... I'm turning 49 in just over a week, ive survived this long with out him... maybe I should give up and walk away? Any thoughts?

Well it's been a while since I updated any of this...

 

weightloss journey: grrrrr the working out is working so is the dieting... but the consistency hasn't been there this past month or so... gotta work on that stop letting work etc get in my way

 

the whole heart failure thing... okay I'm probably gonna get flavk for this but I haven't been to cardiology nor on meds for the past 2 years when I moved from MO to KS I lost my insurance and was dropped instantly by cardiologist- I felt so... devalued like I was just a dollar sign not a human with a treatable condition... now I'm ba k in MO about to get my insurance back and will be going to the doctor again, perhaps at a different facility...

Wow... so stupid,passed on because I refuse to get skype or or anything else... my guess, I didn't miss much...

I seriously question why people complain about their search not going well while pulling stunts like this...  

"I love everything about your profile! You have Skype? No? Well good luck"

I guess ya didn't like it enough to talk with me through the available mediums...

why do people play these stupid games... I thought I had an interested (local) sub that wanted my ideal D/s relationship... well... he decided he's "...too pretty to be a sub, and wants to go to California to get with a modeling agency..." I didn't tell him that I used to model and stilll have connections... why should I? I thanked him for leading me on and blocked him on all media...


Okay that's over... was back at the gym today for the first time in a bit, lot's going on and been sick so BOO!!!!! Did dead lifts for the first time in a long time (maybe 2-3 months?) 235 pound, 5 reps... not bad still not back up to my record but not bad! Left the gym, went to the grocery store (I see enchiladas in my future...) and came home only to find myself bored... I made my drag performer friend a mix, then decided today was a good day to make BBQ Sauce... oooops... 3 kinds... BBQ, Sweet & Spicy, and Hot... my son came by as I was just starting so I had him help... he's jealous that he can't take any home with him... oh well... time to find my next project... maybe I'll go out back and get that firepit started...



Well it's been a bit but I'm still here... I know, darn! Lol

I've been busy the rodeo royalty competition was a bust and very anger inducing not because I lost, because the individual who won used a racial slur against another person in the competition and was not only allowed to continue the competition but won?!?!?!??!!!! Yeah... you can see where this doesn't set well...

I've been nominated for the vice president position of my association but don't think I want it... I'm debating a hiatus, I think I'm due the break...

the working out has been not as steady no thanks to illnesses and injuries but regardless I am still working out 3-4 times weekly...

yeah I'm still determined 

right idea... wrong compatibilit... oh well

looks like I may have met a good local boy who really wants to be with me, I am okay with that, but could use any advice on how to work with someone autistic in this capacity...

New house is almost completely set up and unpacked... this makes me happy! Could have went better with a good boy to help do it all but I'm all moved and comfortable!

There's a full basement that is half finished, maybe if I get a boy we can make a play area down there 😈

Why does moving suck? Sure could use a good boy to help make it easier lol 

I

i just

i just wanted

i just wanted to

i just wanted to take

i just wanted to take up

i just wanted to take up some

i just wanted to take up some space...

 

I dunno, feeling goofy! MAHNA MAHNA!!!

oh what progress I have made... I can't believe that my working out is well, working... oh me of little faith... lol I'm down from 3XL to XL (and even those are getting bigger on me...) From a 52" chest 45" from a 46 waist to an almost 36 waist... I'm developing tone and muscles, to be honest it's kinda exciting!


More progress to come... 

I'm still trying to process tonight... somehow I don't think I'll be able to... 

not to complain, but I'm gonna... you see, my mean evil hateful trainer took away my sugar... it's been a week of no sweet tea, sugar in the coffee, no donuts, sodas, cookies or even worse, no ice cream (who the hell does he think he is???)!!!! 


honestly, except for the no ice cream thing, I am taking it pretty well... I mean, no one has died... yet... 


the IGRA Royalty Competition is coming up fast, October will be here before I know it, just a few (60) more pounds to lose to my goal weight, and a few more inches to shave off the gut and waist, I'm getting there slower than I wanted but getting there... I am almost ready, just a few things left to sort out... 


I still want ice cream... (are you sure this isn't "cruel and unusual punishment"?)

Good luck with your life kid... smdh

I try very hard to get along with everyone, however when I'm not interested take it as that don't try to insult me for it, I'm sure there have been people you weren't interested in as well so get over your pushy fake self and move on... I so seldom use the block feature, but I did today... all because they tried to attack instead of accept... smdh 

So, recently I did a photo shoot for something I am doing in a few months, I kinda wish I had waited for this as I want to lose more weight as I feel like I am still unattractive in my current state, but I had limited time to submit the required photo... grrr...

it's been a few decades since I've done a professional photo shoot, or any modeling for that matter, it was fun, and I may have to do it again soon...

the photo I just uploaded and hopefully gets past the bs approval process soon was one of the ones I really liked from the shoot... but not the one I used for my upcoming bid for a title... however, I will say it's been a confidence boost to see these pics and realize the progress my working out has been... it still amazes me the things I have accomplished and the direction I am headed!

currently I am hovering somewhere between the 225 - 230 weight range... my ultimate goal is to get back to the 160 -170 range... in the last year and a half I have gone from a 46 waist to a 36, I have gone from walking 5 feet and being exhausted to jogging for 2 minuets on the treadmill at a pace almost twice my normal walking pace and feeling ready for more when done... so yes the hovering bothers me, but no it doesn't at the same time. 

I know I'll never be the 130 pound toned build I had into my mid thirties, but I also wont have the unhealthy habits I had that lead to the state I was/am in now either, so I can actually live with that!

3 things that hurt me, 1 smoking, 2 poor diet, 3 the heart failure diagnosis... 3 things I changed: 1 the last 4 years smoke free, 2 a healthier diet I actually follow, 3 I may not win the war, but the battle with the heart failure has been interesting... and I am winning, just like with my weight loss, not at the pace I want lol 

So a bit ago I posted about my weightloss and gettting back in shape journey with a new record for myself, 2 dead lift reps of 265 pounds... well, today I beat that record with 285 pounds for one dead lift.


for those just joining, this is only impressive because I have heart failure and was told I'd never be able to do this...


It's actually impressive that I am even doing this as I never saw myself doing let alone enjoying it...

Yesterday was an amazing day for my weightloss journey... I did 2 reps dead lifts at 265 pounds my most ever, I weighed myself out of curiosity 227 pounds... I'd say this is really working!

it can only keep getting better, right?!?

Today has sucked ass... hurting and not sure how to handle all of it

in my last entry I talked about how I feel better blah blah blah how my weight training has heped me yadda yadda yadda... I got some feedback about it and I gotta say I wasn't expecting that so nice surprise...

now all that is going well, however the diet, while it has MASSIVELY improved, I feel it is still not the best... I still like my ice cream and sodas apparently and though I am trying, larger portions are still my standard... ugh... I welcome suggestions, and recommendations on foods etc.

In Januaury of last year I started a path I never saw myself doing... I hired a trainer and started working out 4 days a week... I feel like there should have been a betting pool, or something, because I NEVER expected to be on that same path a year and four months later...but here I am, healthier, at least 40 pounds lighter, and feeling so much better, physically, mentally, emotionally and about myself.

I constatnly amaze myself with things, like how four years ago my doctors said I'd never lift more than 10 pounds... last Wednesday, I did dead lifts at 205 pounds for 5 reps... or how they said I would never be able to handle running again, I started jogging on the treadmill (supervised of course) and have a total of 5 minuets over 2 days, not bad for something I haven't done in over 20 years, and for someone with "heart failure"...

In the last 20 years of my life, I've gone from an active live to inactive, a 30 waist to a 46, now back down to a 38, inching (get it?) closer to 36 actually... and all I can thinks is "Wow! I really like doing this!"

You see, when I was a kid, it was the "jocks" the weightlifters, the football ogres, I mean players, that bullied harrased and made me feel insecure about being gay, if only they tried that today... anyhow, I never figured that this training I do now would be enjoyable because of that. Actually it's more than enjoyable.

I get out of bed in the mornings with energy, ready to conqure my day and all that it throws at me! All because one day, I decided I wasn't gonna let heart failure win. Because I decided to be a healtheir, better me. And because I literally dared myself to do it! Who knows, maybe in a few weeks I'll give a progress update...

another year older, and yet I still don't feel it... ouch that hurt, help me walk... lol

It's annoying as fuck how many of you have not updated your profile age: 22 been on here since 2007... really? Is it that hard? or are you just that lazy?

who knew it was possible to have so much spam mail on here... an eternity later my bulk box is empty...