Menewa

This site has been a part of my life since 2009. 

I have grown and went through many life changes. 

My Husband is My Master. We rarely go into Master/slave mode but when we do its what we need. 

I realize real serious bdsm is a lifestyle not play and Him and I are far from vanilla. We are deeply spiritual and energy aware so even if we are not practicing what most view as bdsm we have a deep dynamic. 

We have been hit with many things over the years . There is always wave for every person. Ours seemed giantic lol but we are together. 

I was owned by a Master for ten years in the past. I can see clearly now so many things about that time in my life. There are regrets but we cant go back. It was never meant to be something I could have as a real life in all ways. I wish I would of known myself more but it led to what I was suppose to find. It taught me many things. There were times I thought that It was not safe and I never trusted. I wish I could talk to him but I dont think that will ever happen. I understand why. I really think He thought I was something that I never was . The mind web was so layered I will never know. I rarely wonder anymore because I know I will never get answers. 

So I am here...I am just here . I have a few friends here and there that log in. 

My theory is you can't just walk away
It's all about balance in the spiritual realm

You have to choose a side
Once you choose a side you are trapped like in hunger games but on a higher level on a spiritual level

No matter what side you choose the other side's going to come after you

The only way out of it is to just go into the dark shield and exist no more but you can't do that either because you'd feel guilty because of all of your loved ones it's all part of the higher level of mental bondage

.. Wouldn't this make a great movie

And as far as men goes it always starts out great in the beginning but all the stuff they tell you is hardly ever true it's just setting the trap

"life is full of endings that you never know are coming until they already pass"
I wrote that quote in high school. Some of us learn and grow and im grateful that many things have been learned. Some answers will never be known for sure from my journey here in this lifetime.

A new chapter is starting and perhaps the last chapter . Today i finally got to start moving things to a new home . A home that I feel will be my last but things are never certain and I have learned you have to live in the moment and ride each wave.

I feel the shift of energy in the earth but I also know that things must shift so they can heal and balance. My Master Mate and Husband and I have been through many things in these last three years. We have grown and we intend to keep growing together.

I have learned about the light and the dark. I have learned about walking paths. I have learned about consequences for actions. I have learned about addiction . I have learned what vanilla mindsets are like and how many of those could just things that are spiritual and misunderstood. I have definitely learned and experienced Dominance and submission through mind body soul spirit and energy.

We cant protect people from all pain all we can do is try to guide but some lessons must always be learned by the being.

It feels good to write, its been awhile since I sat down and let words flow.

There is always new beginnings

I am so very happy the Journals are back on collarspace. 

Music..... Dont fear the reaper 

FIRE.....................