There's something wrong with my calico, Luna, and I'm very worried. She's not acting like herself. She had a jaw issue the other day and ever since she's been drooling, hiding in the bathtub (she's not a jumper and never did this before), felt warm, acts restless, among other symptoms. She's 7. While not the norm, I've had cats last until 20. This is my familiar. Vet said her teeth look good but to keep an eye on her as she isn't eating the dry food, only wet. We did get her rabies shot done and I'm really hoping she's not having a reaction to it. Will call the vet in the morning and take her in asap. She didn't even fight being picked up, which she hates because she always thinks it's bathtime when she's picked up and usually will fight it and mewl so pitifully but she didn't do that this time. I tried to reach out to Bakayashu for help but he of course is still ignoring me. Whatever. I just hope I don't lose my cat, him, and have to send my kiddo back to her father in two days. I'm already battling horrible depression and barely keeping myself focused through it.  I feel so damn abandoned. Alone. And Baka's silence now just feels cruel.  I just want everything to go back to being good again. 

Requirements, not Expectations.   Respect My time Match My efforts  Keep your word Always be honest Stay consistent   Show up, be on time (words/actions) I will not work harder than you Your word is the honor you start with Omission is the choice you willingly make Consistency builds trust.   Start out being the best you can be and grow. Think about each of these: how to improve a relationship or blow it up by choosing not to do these things. 

I smiled, as I pushed you on the bed, seeing as your body hit the pillow top and sink into its softness.I felt you, as you body contorted when I ran my tongue over the hood of your clit, like a pace horse.I was turned on, at the way you looked at me ging when I slid between your thighs.I melted when you ease into your role as you were given direction.I got excited, as I felt you explode after trying so hard to hold on to that feeling.I am proud, as you walk away naked legs shaking like a newborn calf.I feel relief when you put your head on my chest with a wicked smile on your lipsI can be at peace, knowing that the morning will come and you will still be mine.

Awaken to gentle licks upon my labia and the tickle of your facial hair on my inner thighs  You knowing my body and realizing that sucking my clit is not what gets me going  But that gentle tongue massage on my lower lips causes me to softly moan and drip with wetness  I'm in the euphoria of emotional bliss  Slow intense grinding along with the need to run  I'm about to explode  What a way to wake up,  as the main course I've trained you well and you know how to please  Now, I will lay you back, tie you up, or leave you free  I know before I'm done you'll be screaming please!

Recently I decided to start looking for a Dominant/partner(s). I am Ethically Non-Monogamous and happily so. I am sure, with that hitch, that finding the Dominant I am looking for will be challenging. This July, after getting therapy for 2 1/2 years, I woke up one morning wondering if I had gotten it "wrong." This wasn't for the lack of trying. I've attempted a power dynamic four different times. What if I was attempting to fit myself into a container created by stereotypical spiel of what a submissive is? The spiel is that you must have a 24/7 relationship to be happy. And there was a sure way to do power dynamics and a specific way not to do power dynamics. During my time of hiatus in relationships, I've explored a lot. I've developed a sweet co-parenting kinky caregiver arrangement with two individuals, a sadomasochism connection with a good friend, and an exploration of what makes me happy. This week while I have been lying in bed thinking about missing having someone hold me accountable for reading and writing book reports. I was part of this dynamic a while ago in a recent relationship. I came to love the expectation and being expected to do this, but the connection was riddled with potholes and unhealthy manipulation. The slave practice of this is what a friend describes as an Academic Power Slave. I'm going to need to unpack this more. I have already had someone reach out and ask me what I am looking for right now. I can say that I am not looking to "hook up" with someone to get a perceived need met and fulfilled quickly. What I am looking for, what I do know, is that I am looking for four things. I am looking for someone(s) who wants to have a committed relationship with me.  Who is looking for non-traditional services, like a concierge and specialized services. Who has their mental health and ducks in a row and puts continuous work on themselves. Who is comfortable and affirming non-monogamy.

 One of the hardest things to learn as a Domme type because it goes against a lot of societal programing, is extracting obedience when there is resistance and things are going wrong. These rules from a military prospective should be kept in mind to help us. -You can’t expect obedience because someone owes you.-You can’t expect obedience because you have won a popularity contest.-You can’t expect obedience because it makes sense to them.-You can’t request obedience.-You can’t bargain for obedience. It is something you must command.

Smh at the multitude of bois within 50 miles that approach, engage,  insist they want to meet .. until we set a date and time, then backpedal and postpone or cancel with every excuse in the book .. Sooooo...I'm pretty much at the pt I don't wont cant believe anything anyone idk irl says cyber.   If you are one of the very rare pearls here that does want real-time Ds interactions come meet Me at the munch on Thursday 9 29 at Spins in Peekskill 6:30ish. It's an arcade with a bar in the back. I'm the One with long multicolored hair. .. restaurant upstairs is Fin and Brew if that's easier to goo gle Que sera .. or as history here proves, most likely not We.Shall.See

i'm always in a very weird place in my spaces on earth. in every sense of the word i'm 'in the worlds but not of it'.   when i connect with my mermaid and water being feminine people and try to befriend them and socialize, i'm often come across man hating retroic. men ain't shit. kill men. a mermaid would never be with a man. if you are wanting to be married by a man something is wrong with you. a mermaid is never meant to be tamed. brimstone and fire.   probably partly because of my virgo rising and partly because of my priestess nature i can't relate. in my heart of hearts how i approach romantic and sexual framework with men is  in a perfect world a sacred slavery mentality. honor, worship, respect, reverence, and deep feminine care and caressing and holding is how my dream is in my heart and my mind. in a perfect world i am always claimed by the mother ocean, but she is holding place and will hold my hand off in divine union and marriage to my master husband. this mermaid knows in a perfect world in my heart of hearts the divine masculine which would in a perfect world translate to a man in real life on earth in the flesh owns me heart, mind, body and soul. and it tends to express that most men that have attempted to date me tend to be on a soulmate level, some things die hard and my soul is built for a deeper cosmic way of loving and fucking than what most superficial people see.    in a alternative space group i saw a whack ass man proudly show his bdsm tools like a big inflated ego boy in a group that is clearly not just 18+  probably wanting some ego stroking saying just had a good session. it got lots of comments. i'm sure some womens panties were fulfilled by that. i looked at it as true goddess of devotion on a deeper moment. session? how does that translate to your world. your life. you packed it up and you closed it out. what about your next breath, your next step, your next hand hold, your next eye stare..the next intent of the energy you speak to her. how does your session carry out in your 24/7 lifestyle of devotion servitude mastery and slavery? dominance and submission? you can only hold it for  a session that is good and requiring or preferring some tools to achieve that ecstatic level of pleasure and absolute sinking into each other. that's cute. but what about the end goal, complete devotion and union. or is it just for a quick dopamine run and back to being vanilla lower cylinder working engagements between each other and life goes on. because if not we all know while in a perfect world it would include financial, cohabitating, family future planning generational security stability community elevating discussions between both parties as a power couple of house if it's multiple people involved......it doesn't have to be and can go on without cohabitating, without the legal contract change...though i still don't understand why most men want to own women but don't have the balls to legally take her as property and change her name to seal the full deal. so many come across, i haven't thought about that, there are ways of doing it without getting the law involved, we don't need the governmental intuition we have to operate under to know she's my property as long as it's in our hearts it's ok...always comes off as a cop out to me. but i know everyone is built different. tools can be fun but it's just like yoga, in the west anasa is so popular because we don't know how to get still inside to get to the real higher work of the various limbs of study and practice. and still doesn't have to be sitting, meditation is also dance movement and action. it's a stillness in the mind.   some of my dark goddess sisters both of the sophia original source encoded soul that are different copies of my own self....or others with a different original divine feminine soul encoded on them(sophia isn't the only form of the divine feminine, it's just WHO i am...so what MY mission is...MY journey..MY teachings...and my lived path to walk) continue the man hate. men deserve to die. nwords ain't shit. fuck a guy. i hate men.   i can't relate.   i've never had a man in real life protect, provide, or care for me. i've been in clubs by myself and have drunk men try to hug me, touch my arms, rub  up on my breasts and inappropriate get in my space. i've had to push men off  one, two, three, four times very visibly public. i've had to say loudly no, more than once. no bouncer at the clubs come. none of the men in the vicinity that can hear me(my voice is loud and piercings and energetic and many a person has said i talk too loud naturally) and they don't break from their girlfriends, wives, friend groups to come over and say stop bro. or to say are you okay? or is everything alright. they stay on the sidelines watching as i the dark goddess have to rise to protect myself.   i've dated men who see when i'm out and about other men try to approach me that i'm uncomfortable with and they've laughed it off, making me rise to the challenge to assert myself i'm with a guy and even if i wasn't this invasion of space is inappropriate.    i've been through so many daddies that want to inappropriately harness my overtly sexual little girl with no promise of provision, protection, guidance, care, and structure that the daddy dominant is supposed to provide. i've had them break me so much i've wanted to die when that carrot stick of the ultimate romantic mix of nurturing and strength and slightly sinister love gets taken away.   i've been assaulted in that way and when i told the man i was dating at the time, instead of being a righteous archangel michael divine masculine encoded self asked what was i wearing, what was i doing maybe i did something to provoke it. when i go through the questions and ask for them to come over to hug me, to reset my body my nervous system, to heal me from what their brother did and get myself reacclimated to what i have always known in my heart of hearts to be what the real masculine the true masculine is..i was rejected but he loved me.   and on and on...i have every experience to join the men ain't shit nword ain't shit kill men.....and i'm just not wired that way.   even recognizing the world isn't perfect, and that i wasn't born to be on the regular track where men in reality come to my rescue, show up for me, open the doors for me, hold me, watch me, make sure i'm okay, provide the stability, structure, care and support of just a regular vanilla way or an elevated power dynamic way....i don't' waver from the mission of 5d.. a higher cosmic love and union..i don't waver from the truth i've been seen.   there's the sauce of real life...and then there's the truth of what is beyond in the ethers.   and in the eithers.....i'm so divinely cared for and protected, cherished and loved. while the men in reality cannot hold the energetics of the transformative fiery goddess i am that will require them to constantly level up, to grow, to face their fears, be called out on their mistakes, be pushed to elevate, grow, emotionally stretch, touch feelings they could hide and side step from everyone else, and to always be tracked and seen energetically, spiritually, emotionally, mentally.....the divine form is always here.   and so while it's not a perfect world, i am incapable of losing the respect, the reverence, the worship, the care, the holding, the deep sense of devotion to the man in spirit. i don't have to receive a gift on a date,  i don't have to be asked out on a physical date, i don't have to have the door held open, i don't have have dinner paid for me, i don't have to receive an engagement ring, i don't have to re

LongTerm Chastity The waves of denial come and go.There are days when i forget that i am locked up, then a wave of reality hits and the feeling of helplessness and inferiority pound on my psyche.The need to be teased, aroused and denied as others enjoy their sexual freedoms intensifies..i started this journey out of curiosity and now i am overwhelmed with the need to be locked.i have gone back to my original device. It is open and i can keep myself clean without removing it.i am wondering if i should forgo any shaving, thus eliminating any reason for the occasional unlocking.Thoughts of making this permanent and irreversible have entered my mind. It would be easy enough to do: Hex button Stainless Steel screw, a tap, Locktite 266. (Don't forget to round out the Hex hole with a f=drill bit after it is tightly in place, to render the Hex key useless.) .Yes, the thought has crossed my mind..........a few times..

Any MALE OR FEMALE who wants to contact Me about a submissive male  servant or dominant male whom they met online, and wonder if they are a MONUMENTAL GAME PLAYER, is free to contact Me.  Once verified , I will gladly share the information I have and possibly save you valuable time and energy. Well, well, well... A very deep and sometimes disturbing subject indeed! I've had the need to take some time off.  I've been duped and while it is hard to admit that a woman of My age and intellect has been bamboozeled, I'm comforted knowing that this type of thing happens to many of us, most especially when we are vulnerable due to life circumstances or state of mind and that I shall be wiser for the game played.   While undertaking the supreme challenge of finding a right sub for Myself, I happened upon the GREATEST ONLINE MINDFUCKER that ever was and I discovered he has been playing around here and Fet for over 14 plus years and at least 31 profiles on CollarSpace to date!!! VICTORY!  I finally was able to find them out though I must say I was led on a not-so-merry chase full of intrigue and suspense, aliens, judges, the government, medical organizations and secret societies! LOL  It takes all sorts. After all, I have to laugh at Myself and how vulnerable My state of mind must be to have gone down that rabbit hole. I would not change the knowledge gained through the experience though I am seriously butt sore. NEEDLESS TO SAY, ANY DOMINANT SLAVE OR SUB MAN READING THIS WILL PROVE YOURSELF OR PASS ME BY. I have a phone, pictures, telegraph, google chat, skype and every other possible means of communication and verification including but not limited to a car! We chat, we verify, we meet or part.  

All set with game players and time wasters and dream killers.   I don't lie, cheat or steal. I am looking for the right slave.  Correction, I am looking for a right connection and a decent human being who knows how to treat a woman, and wants to explore together.  A right male is MORE THAN ENOUGH to be by My side and in reasonable good time.  I am looking for a live in relationship, not email, phone or text. I'm dominant and that isn't going to change.  I feel no threat from a man who knows his mind and has the ability to speak up for himself and be a team player.  Welcome.  We can co-rule our own little world together. My mother lives with Me and has Alzheimer's.  You serve Me, you serve She.  You are with Me, you are with her. Be real and ready to communicate effectively and get to know one another in the flesh.   Be terrific in your own right.  I require a man who is strong enough to champion Me and I offer nothing less in return.   DON'T WASTE  MY  TIME.  

stranger things I am absolutely, undeniably always attracted to the most random male attributes!. My body betrays any hint of ladylike grace and elegance when these are near:  some seem reasonable; denote strength, virility, ability to provide & protect, etc. -Infuriatingly, my train of thought derails immediately when a Tall Gentleman with a Commanding presence… presents. -Still waters run deep.  a thoughtful Man that makes the most of His words.. Oh good gracious, words escape me! -Large hands make my mouth water. Really. It’s a bit embarrassing actually. And for heavens sake, do Not point at me! My jaw drops. -Just don’t even get me started on a deep voicebc…. Well…. I’m a complete loss! Like a deer in headlights. And be still my heart if there’s the slightest hint of an accent?!😳. I just… oh dear These are characteristics of many a successful, beloved Leader! Totally ‘understandable’ right? But there are subtle nuances that make me especially attentive and forget what I was saying! -Like laugh lines. When a Huge Man is most comfortable with a Genuine Smile and wit, isn’t afraid to laugh loudly! I get this dorky smirk and stare unabashedly. -If He actually ‘gets’ my random 90s geekdom movie quotes or music lyrics.  I’m a goner. Princess Bride, Anamaniacs, Star Trek/Wars…. -when He Leads, Protaspects, Nurtures by nature a friend, employee, child, pet, good grief!  I just want to cuddle in like a tiny, lost bunny and nuzzle! -His preference is to connect and hold eye contact, with engaging conversation…. i can’t even. Just here, Take my Soul! -cargo pants. What’s with this one? As if he is ‘prepared’ at all times with some random macguyvery multi-tool to save the day?!  Swoon. (Utterly Humiliating!) -random facts and extrapolation that we can mull and discuss, I love to learn from Him!. I don’t know how I made it through academia without becoming a literal teacher’s pet?! -mechanically inclined- if He can fix things instead of treating every dang thing in life as disposable….Maybe there’s hope??? Stranger things have happened! (copied from my journal!)

Subtle Tease of The Day This one is simple. It requires no toys or even touching. You don't even need privacy. Every hour (or a feasible but consistent interval) complete this sentence: "I get aroused when I think of ... and I get wet when I imagine..." That's it. Take a moment or two to fantasize. You don't have to share your thoughts. They are welcome

Random (consensual) bondage fantasy:   The room is dark and quiet, lit only with some kind of blacklight, and maybe some creepy ambient bass-heavy background music is playing. The room is full of mirrors, which allows me to see both my perfectly done makeup and the bonds restricting my movements I'm bound by heavy rubber inflatable inner tubes from my chest (right below my bra) all the way down to my ankles, my arms pinned tightly to my sides and each ring fitting its respective section of my body snugly enough that I can't move an inch. They're also so thick once fully pumped up that my feet don't touch the ground. I'm left on the floor face down, unable to do anything except attempt to rock side to side or look in the mirror to see my pouty red lips wrapped firmly around my ball gag.  This whole time I can also feel the stretch of the buttplug that was put in me before I was put in the constricting grip of my inflatable bonds. My dom eventually enters the room, clad from head to toe in a heavy rubber catsuit and a latex hood that completely hides his face, saying little beyond asking if I'm ready for the load he's been saving all week, to which I affirmatively moan around the ball gag. He casually rolls me over so I'm lying face up, taking the ball gag out of my mouth before he unzips his crotch, pulls out his cock and kneels down and straddles my face.  He proceeds to slowly thrust into my mouth while I wrap my lips as tight as I can around his shaft, unable to do much more in my distended bonds, his movements gradually increasing in pace until he blows a huge load directly in my mouth, spurting one shot after another into the back of my throat while I do my best to hold it all in my mouth. He then pulls his cock from my mouth with a loud pop and tells me to open my mouth and show him the cum.  I open my mouth and show him the copious pool of semen in my mouth, playing with it until he tells me to swallow it all.  He then tells me he'll be back for more before he exits the room, leaving me still bound and unable to clean off any cum that may have spilled out of my mouth. He then comes back half an hour later, already ready to use my mouth again, but this time he props me sitting up against the wall so that he can get a better angle, and then proceeds to fuck my face again until he blows another load. He then leaves again, leaving me sitting slumped and bound against the wall. He eventually comes back one more time, brining me back to the floor turning me over so that I'm face down again and removing the inner tubes trapping my lower body in order to have access to my ass.  He slowly pulls down the back of my panties, takes out the buttplug and begins to finger me with a gloved hand, edging me with his fingers alone as he intermittently and quietly asks me questions about sucking his cock and about whether I want to cum, with me moaning and answering in the affirmative as he uses his edging to make me subtly beg.  He then pulls out his cock (and puts on a condom and plenty of lube) and proceeds to fuck me, using the inner tubes still binding my upper body as a makeshift cushion as his cock gets even harder and eventually swells and pulsates inside of me until I cum all over myself inside the front of my panties while he fills up the condom, finally spent once and for all. He helps me out of my bondage, never removing his mask or catsuit until I'm gone, going only by the pseudonym he gave me and the calling card he left for the next time I want to help him relieve some stress.

Reflection: Week 1 Well I would say that the first week has gone pretty well. I have worn my collar daily. I have used a plug all but one day. I will find some additional attire for around the house that will be acceptable. I have shared all of the messages with him that I have received since the beginning of the new year. It may be a small step but I feel like these things help maintain a good headspace for us bith and encourages intimacy on various levels. I will try to keep an ongoung update as time permits. Through reflection comes the opportunity for growth.

I'm surprised to see this site still exists. I've enjoyed BDSM lifestyle for numerous years. I'm not some mindless or spinelss door mate. I'm educated, a career professional and will always tempt you to be the best and most erotic Domiant possible. That my submissive purpose and desire. I had a play partner for nearly a years but went to work on a project in Europe for a while and lost a lot of US connections and friends. Earlier this year I crossed path with a Dominant female and it was intoxicating. She used and enjoyed me as her boy slut. All those submissive cravings and desires flooded my mind and body as she had unrestricted and unlimited use of me in very demanding and erotic ways. It made me realize how much I want and have missed this lifestyle. I've been used, shared and enjoyed as an obedient, submissive fuck toy. I love having my limits pushed and being used long and hard. This lifestle is best when the chemistry is free and mentally unrestricted. Trust that the Domme individual has the maturity level to forster an energetic and positive experience. I think a Domimant individual is at their best when not limited and mentally unrestricted to explore freely with a submissive. Trust is paramount.   

Communication is key: Make sure you are clear about your desires and boundaries, and listen actively to your partner's needs and limits. Respect boundaries: Always respect your partner's limits and never push them to do something they are not comfortable with. Safe, sane and consensual: Always practice safe and consensual BDSM, and never engage in activities that could cause serious harm. Learn and educate yourself: Take the time to learn about BDSM practices, safety measures and the different types of play. Be honest and authentic: Be true to yourself and your desires, and never pretend to be something you're not. Empathy and compassion: Show empathy and compassion towards your partner and always strive to create a positive experience for them. Be flexible and open-minded: Be open to new experiences and be willing to adapt your approach when needed. Take responsibility: Take responsibility for your actions and be willing to make amends if you make a mistake. Practice self-care: Take care of yourself physically and emotionally, and make sure that you are in the right mindset before engaging in BDSM activities. Have fun: Remember that BDSM should be enjoyable for both partners, so don't take things too seriously and have fun with it.

Sometimes physical things are not the heaviest things to remove.  Told that just now to a friend who recently lost their mother, and was tasked with cleaning out the house.  Sometimes i say things so deep, that i make myself pause and think. Last night, i was venting to one of the people in my RPG guild in ESO.  He was saying how he just needed reminders about posting stuff on the site and whatnot.  i told him i was done giving him reminders, and he asked why.  That was when a dam i hadn't known was ready to break, burst.  i told him, that if someone really wants to do something, they will do it.  They will do whatever they must, to ensure it happens. i reminded him that he has a wife, and a professional life, and he must be doing well enough to govern himself.  i asked him, who looks after me, who gives me reminders to do things? i reminded him, how i have -no one-.  i have sticky notes all over the place, a phone full of alarms and reminders, because my memory is crap... How is it fair, that i should have to hand-hold grown adults in the guild, to remind them and chase after them to look after their own characters.  Told him i was done, time people sink or swim. Of course, all that has ~nothing~ do to with the Lifestyle or genre on this site... Just another peek though, into my mundane life.    

I'm bemused by the number of people who ask me what I'm looking for on here, or whether they can locate or contact me elsewhere. The first should be fairly obvious, I'd think, to anyone who's read my profiles here. As for the second part... I'm quite easy to find. *chuckle* I've determined that after 29 years, I'm just not as interested in chatting online as I once was, and I find small getting-to-know-you talk tedious. I love getting to the meaty topics, though, which is why The F0rm exists.  If, after you've thoroughly read my profiles here (BlueFyre and BlueAngelFyre) and on Fet, and you'd still like to be considered for being in my service, peruse my writing on FL of "The F0rm - What TF and Why TF?!" Once you've completed a section or more, reach out to me and send your responses. After that, I'm sure there will be plenty to discuss. ;)   --Blue (=

I have now collared and own NJ Slave1010. It worships me without exception and without question. I have erased most thoughts from its mind, so all it knows is worshipping me, adoring me, thinking about me. I have inserted certain words in its head. So when It reads them or hears them or says them Its’ slave worm, which is now mine, goes to instant erection in honor of me. Only I can grant what is now mine release, not it anymore. And it suffers deeply for me has declared its undying slave love to me.. If any other slaves would love to be my slave and fall deeply in love with me. writing slave love letters to me. Then you can contact me here. You will worship me, adore me, and obey me. I will also instill a bouffant and salon fetish in you where you worship the bouffant Women Having their hair styled in exotic, full, thick. Updo bouffant hairdos and rollers or under dryers like the goddesses they deserve to be. This also goes for CDs who are into this also, I would love to have you worship me getting your hair done in large exotic hairdos under dryers and in large rollers for me.

I am having one of those days today, triggers are pushing me into grief. Things I am reading, elsewhere, and stuff on TV. When I took two grief counselling courses after my mum died, I found out about the fact that grief can pop up at any time, often a random trigger bringing it to the surface.  Well today I am feeling very sad over the passing of an ex submissive, she found me on here, and after messaging me, I wasn't here much then, on another kink site, we got together.  It was good for a long time, she had more experience, and I was a relative newbie, having only a years experience, still she consented to being mine. I learn't so much, and I will be forever grateful. After we separated, we stayed friends until I got involved with someone, who wasn't her, the friendship ended then. I had already tried once and another time would not have worked any better, so I moved on, but I guess she didn't.  I know we would never have been friends again, but I miss her, and the idea of the universe not having her in it, that's painful. I had hoped she would meet someone better suited to her, but that didn't happen before she passed. That breaks my heart.  The reason I am writing this, is, life is short, very short. It only seems like yesterday I was 20, and now there are fewer years ahead of me, than behind, and I wish everyone happiness, and fulfilment, including me. Thing is you never know the moment or the hour, people die suddenly, she did, my dad did and, well don't waste your life, live it fiercely, honestly, with care, consideration, and love.     Tain   

Can anyone explain to me why people's profiles under "actively seeking" can say: "Submissive female" but then can say   "Sub / Slave Male"   I clicked purely to investigate this, to "edit my profile", thinking "well, maybe one can now, unlike in the past, select any one of 4 varieties: 'submissive female', and/or 'submissive male', and/or "Sub/Slave female" and/or "Sub/Slave male" but saw only two options, same as old ones.Yet on people's profiles the above asymmetrical   Why force some to express interest in, and prevent others from expressing interest in, "slaves"? ?Or is that not the case, throughso it seems from just a quick glance. Anyone know? Post in your Journal.    

Here is the deal .  Just because you send Me a picture of yourself does not mean I have to send you Mine.  If I wanted My picture out there I would have it on My profile now wouldn't I ?   If I get to really know you and think that we might be a possibility I have no problem sending , picture, email and phone.    However and until then don't ask for any of that.   Understand I get several messages a day.   Some are ones from another country, some are just looking to " play"  some are only in a fantasy space in their heads, some are married , some have their own place and will never move.  There are many variations and reasons why I don't go farther with somone. But, those are the main ones.   Honesty seems to be quite rare on here.... First be honest with yourself. We aren't looking for someone perfect, loyalty, honesty and long term that is what I am looking for.  That is what I'm used to and like.  And men seriously ... use that little brain of yours. This site is getting more and more scammers of men posing as woman. They say all the "right things" and some of you believe it, then they ask for money. Wake up, it don't work that way. A 29 year old model with a stolen only fans picture is NOT  after you.  he/she/it want's your money thats it.  Don't be stupid and encourage  the scammers .  

My Daddy is gone After 2 years my Daddy has finally left 😔. I'm utterly devestated because he has been my everything and I feel so lost and empty without him. I know I can't be mad at him because I'm such a difficult person to be with and be around. I couldn't trust him with all my being no matter how hard I tried. I failed us both because I just couldn't get better and improve my life and just be happy. I really hope that he finds someone better because he deserves it. He had so much patience and did his best to understand me but I just couldn't deal with all my trauma and pain and it kept getting worse and worse. I know he had to leave to save himself and I don't know what to do. I don't know how to stop the men that I end up loving from leaving so maybe I just need to accept that I should be alone, so noone else gets hurt. It's the same reason that I haven't had children, I don't trust myself to not hurt them emotionally.

Her hands held the pen, the black ink swirling across the page as she signed the contract. The last time she would ever see her real name, the last time her date of birth would even matter. She paused, holding her breath in her shuttering lungs… and as the seconds ticked by like years, her lung’s released and the chime rang. The electronic paper instantly sealed the contact and the encryption code saved to the nanochip.A metal arm came from the wall, and in a quick second her eyes blinked, and the chip engaged.She was still her, her personality, her smile, her spirit, but her body now belonged to the New American Order. She fought as long as she could, the price of housing and food had risen so high she was living so poorly. They had removed all unchipped teachers long ago, uncipped could not work jobs that paid in NAObitcoin. She could only get paid in paper money which only unchipped could spend. The black market was dangerous and she knew the consequences.The government now allowed people to elect to be chipped as household wifes. They would live a normal life, raising children, and making their families a unit, and thus rebuilding the community which once made this nation strong.She was a beautiful women, her long auburn hair landed in near perfect curls, her beautiful eyes could sink the universe. She held a PHD and would make an excellent home school teacher for a man who had a large family.She sat in the chair, gripping the skirt if the dress, and staring at the wall. A screen came on and the host started talking.“Gentlemen of the NAO tonight we have a wonderful selection of wives. They have all signed in willingly so there are no confinement rules for these women. Lets get started.”The door to her room opened and she stepped in to the hall. She took the step and closed her eyes, her sister got a nice man, they are so happy. She was going to have the same, she knew it.“First we have this beautiful older model, she will bare no children, but she is sweet and caring. She has a good voice, pleasant demeanor, tested level 9/10 in cooking and house keeping, she scored 10/10 in intellect. As you know gentlemen she will be tested for sexual abilities, her current rating in the outside was 4.6 so definitely above average but those chipless have no idea.”The door opened at the end of the hall, she walked quickly to the door, she had watched this millions if times on the tele. It had become required viewing but the poor only got to see the limited view, they put so many propaganda commercials in the show it was hard to really understand what was happening.The men in the room were all high class government officials, they were all men who had created the order, and their first wives were probably in work camps, or dead from the war. The rebels attacked their homes and wives, so many ran to other countries at the end of the war. Now other countries were turned to watch as NAO rebuilt and became the world leader of technology and education.The days of the starving poor was over, well as long as you chipped up. If you were a normie your life didnt change except you had no rent, no bills, but you worked for the government and ate what the government gave you. It wasnt a horrible life, you married in your class, and lived happy. The problem came with people like her. She was smart enough to live with out the system, pretty enough to be a wife, refined and well skilled, and her date rating put her on their radar.She only signed up to find a match, she was sick of her lonely home. They just started letting nochips on the site and she knew better!When her rating hit its highest the rent in her area went up, the power for vehicles tripled, food prices doubled. She got a speeding ticket and that was it… she couldn’t pay her rent… and there Lacy was, to offer her a spot in the highest ranked tv show in the History of the planet. It was required watching in the NAO and many international countries allowed their citizens to watch and participate, part of the new Jenniva treaty.So here she was, the room was black, the ceiling back, the bed and everything painted in the darkest black. She stepped to the door and the door behind her shut.“Remove your dress and precede to the bed.” The audience wouldnt see anything, its black, there is no light, but there are speakers and they can hear everything. She pulled her dress off and sat it next to the bed. She was stark naked, her large breasts we’re hanging from her, her body shivered as her hair tickled her back. She crouched down and lay down on the bed.“Place your right hand on the board. Place your left hand on the left board.” Her arms moved and then click the magnet locked, they had implanted her with magnets and chips throughout her body. The lights clicked off. For a second she could hear movement and then the headphones clapped down on her head. Hands ran down her body and the audience cheered as the meter stared to rise. His hands found her face and he pulled her in to a kiss, his tongue darting about and dancing with hers. His other hand found her pussy, and he clamped his hand down. The meter went to 1.0, and then his finger slipped inside, her body wetting for him, his head tilted, and his eyes flickered in to the darkness. “Ohhh a fun one.” He whispered in her ear. His fingers began working her clit and her body responded, he rubbed and twisted and pulled as she moaned loudly. Her chip holding her back from orgasm but leaving her right in the edge. He paused, and his mouth found her breasts which made her moan loudly again as the meter kept rising 3.0,4.0,7.0. The crowd started to whisper as no one had ever gotten higher than 8 and she was just starting. He pressed his cock against her, his large head pushing hard, as her rating went higher, and then he pushed in, hard. His huge cock filling her and pushing hard against the top of her as she moaned loudly, the harder he pushed the rougher he got the more she moaned and flooded him. Her hips moved with his, drawing him deeper, harder as she ground herself in to him. He reached up and put his hand on her neck, the default for allowing an orgasm during testing and she came. Her vagina pressed in on him pulsating hard as he continued to pound her, she came hard over and over moaning loudly. He stopped for a second and stepped back. “Turn over.” Her wrists released, and she flipped over, she had not had sex like this in years, she forgot it was anything other than a glorious night of love. He gripped her hips and pressed his cock in to her ass, as she arched her back and moaned out loudly. He started to work her ass slowly and then harder and harder pounding her hard. She shook as his hips hit her ass with a force she couldn’t believe. It almost took her breath how hard and good it felt. He reached up and grabbed her hair and held it tight slamming in to her harder, his other hand found her clit. He wouldn’t let her cum, he had decided now she didn't get anymore, they were all his. He pressed harder and harder, her body sweating and her breathing rough he continued, as he came he slapped her ass hard. The number blinked on the wall 8.7 highest first test score. The room blacked.. the commercial started, and men whispered among themselves.“I think i might have enough to purchasing that one.” A tall dark gentleman spoke. The room fell silent, as a bell rang which meant a second test was requested. The testing fee was not cheep, but someone needed to know her limit.Two men with night vision glasses came in and helped her straddle a round saw horse, her leg magnet locking in place, her wrists, she could no longer move.“Its time for the maximum orgasm test!” The host spoke in an over excited tone, his own body reacting to the sights. The lights turned off and above her head a digital board read 4.“According to the chip she has already orgasmed 4 times, remember folks the highest score ever is 70, in 2hours and 10 min. Once we start this test we will continue the auction.She was cold, but as soon as she felt it the sensation went away, the chip overriding the warning. A buzz starts in the background and her body starts to prepare, the sound of a milker clicking away behind her also made her body react. The buzz and tick tick take her in to a trance, and her body relaxes. He inserts a large 1 inch dildo inside if her, he clips the vibratior clamp on her clit as she lets out a loud yelp.“Mute her please.” The host says quietly. The man hits a button and her moans quiet and she starts to orgasm.“Oh no not yet kitten we aren’t even there yet.” His deep voice echoed in her ear, as thr command found its protocol, her body slowed the orgasm, and then liquid squirts on her ass as he presses in and works a large plug, its vibrations start to sink with the dildo. Her entire body clamped down, which only made the sensation stronger as she orgasmed hard. "oh yeah I should… release." as the word echoed in her empty mind the orgasms rushed in..10,11,12,13… her biometric system counting orgasm after orgasm.He smiled in to the dark as the goat milker cups attached to each breast and turned on low, then higher and higher, as it sucked her 38h breasts deep in to the glass, 22,23,26.He stood there watching with his night vision , his prize will be a percentage of her price, 30,31,32. He grabbed a flogger and whipped her ass hard, a flood of orgasms came in 41,43,44. He spanked her again, 50."Gentlemen our special purchase has hit 50! can you believe that? alright next is 35, rating 4.5, cooking 6 but comes with optional upgrade option, overall sex rating 8 with a maximum daily use 3 times… the bidding starts at her debt to the NAO of 100 Naobitcoins. Let the game begin. " the host pointed to the screen where bids were flying in from all over the world."The timer has started… bids are up to 2,000… 2,300… 3,2,1. 2,600 NAOBC… And your name is Cynthia. congratulations and may you live in the peace of your submission. " the audience said along with the host."now were are we at with our live test… 67 in 30 min, 68,69,70! she beat the record! She sucked breath in to her lungs as her body just kept going, she was dripping with sweat, her body begging for help, her moans muted her voice box turned off as she cameover and over. The machines clicked off her body shivered, and the chip took over, her hands and legs released as she stood, her brain not fully functioning. She walked to the bed her legs shaking and pulled her dress on. A door opened to a bathroom, an entire crew of beauty and glamor experts stood there. They had one commercial break to make her look fresh. She was pushed in to a shower the water spraying up and down on her in all directions. The water turned to warm air as she stepped from the shower dry and clean, the stockings slid on and clipped in to a pink and black garter. the corset top clipped in to place and then tied tight. her dress was slid over her head, and tightened down. Her hair was twisted and twirled and her makeup went on fast, a blinking light told the crew it was time.“Gentlemen it is time. How much would you pay? The time starts now…..” the     

RAM - Forever And A Day I'll show you I love youI'll show you I careI'll tell you everything you want and need to hear I'll heal your sorrow as long as I'm hereI'll make you smile again so loud and clearWhen your daylight disappearsWhen the storm is coming nearWhen you feel like hope is gone, lean on me – I'll be strongLet it all out now, it will be okayCause I'm gonna heal you now, forever and a dayDon't you give up now, it will be okayCause I'm gonna fight for you forever and a day

I am finally in WV! It was a hectic past three months.  I don't know what I would have done without  my wonderful Dom, Tony! It has taken four days to recover from the stress of moving.  With the weekend packing, loading,  renting a huge cargo van, driving 6/7 hours, unloading and driving back for four weeks straight.  All while working and saying goodbyes.  Add to this, two parents having their separate issues, and projecting them...it's over! I'm in a cabin with my pets. Tony and I are working on adjusting. He trying to find a remote position, so he can come this way. Me trying to adjust to an area I have never been , and know not a soul here. Setting up utilities, , registering, making sure mail gets to me,  and all the things that go with a huge move. I'm still unpacking, and then I have to get the cottage ready to lease.  That will be a bit weird for me, I reeeeally like my privacy. But I need to set up passive income.   Lots to do, I miss you Tony💙💙   M.

Psst... It's secret time. Pinky swear you won't go and tell? I'm trusting you since we're journal friends. I follow two journals: 1. A delightful crotchety and humorous dominant man who shares brief opinions from time to time. He's clever and funny and doesn't really care what you think. I dig it.   2. An eloquent dominant female who shares song lyrics, poetry, and conversations over tea. She elevates this place. I would love to go into a used book shop with her.  Okay, here's the secret part where it gets a little weird. I do not follow but I look for two other journals. The first is a dominant male who I am pretty sure is certifiably mad. I won't officially follow him to ensure I stay off of his radar as a precaution- sacrificial lamb is not my kink. But you better believe I scroll the journals to catch any new entries.* The other is a dominant male who often posts. I think he is some sort of AI. Hear me out. All of the sentiments match to the point of being repetitive. With poor grammar. It's like riding a hamster wheel. Someone requested it, AI produced it, it was slapped in a journal, and there's a psychologist teaming with a scientist in the background monitoring to see who falls for it. I can't picture someone producing the same phrases over and over. Even the mad hatter doesn't do that. Has to be a bot.  No, I won't tell you who they are, don't ask. If you know, you know. And if you're the psychologist and scientist letting me know that I figured it out, do put a rush on that.  *My crotchety friend is also fascinated with the mad hatter's entries. I knew he was good people. 

Message to a new submissive/slave   So you love service. And you have discovered the great world of BDSM. Allow me to tell you a few things. I'm going to tell you what I tell every new person whether they are Christian or not. You have to find what works for you. If you are happy being a submissive then learn to be the best sub possible.    First find a Mentor. A good mentor is not a sexual partner. Mentorship is a personal developmental relationship in which a more experienced or more knowledgeable person helps to guide a less experienced or less knowledgeable person. However, true mentoring is more than just answering occasional questions or providing ad hoc help. It is about an ongoing relationship of learning, dialog, and challenge.* – Wikipedia I suggest a good mentor would be another submissive or slave. Not that Dominants/Masters can’t mentor a sub/slave, I do it all the time. But I just think someone who has been what you are going through would understand. I understand because I was trained from the bottom up. That means I started as a sub before earning my title of Master. Join groups. Fellowship with other submissives is a good thing. You do not want to isolate yourself. Hanging and talking will help you understand what you are and that there are others like you.   Ask questions. Questioning is a good thing and a good way to stay safe. A Dominant/Master should be willing to answer question. Ask other subs/slaves questions too   Also, just because someone claims to be a Master does not give them the right to start dominating you.  If a Master that you have not negotiated with, tells you that you are a sub or slave, therefore; you have to follow their orders, then it is a good idea to cut off communication with them.     Don’t settle for the first Master that comes along.  Think of this as a romantic relationship.  Do you marry the first man or woman that smiles at you?  Get to know more than one.  Until you are ready to make a commitment to a Dominant/Master/Mistress, you have the right to talk to several.   Also remember that your feelings matter.  In play a Dom/Master/Mistress might say that they do not, but this should only be in play.  In r/l your thoughts, emotions, desires, and even your health matter.   Ok let’s talk about power and power exchange. And remember the submissive/slave has all the power. Not the Dominant/Master/Mistress, we have no power except what you give us. The power exchange can be a beautiful thing when done right.     The foundation and corner stone of this lifestyle is consent. You have a right to consent. If someone does something to you that you do not consent to. Run away, don't walk.. run. Part of consent is setting limits. You have a right to set limits. Submissive will do this within the relationship. A slave should set her limits in negotiation. Yes slave you have that right. You should always negotiate with a Master. If a Master says you do not have that right, run away.  Remember these: SCC & RACK. The first SCC stands for safe, sane, and consensual. A Dominant/ Master/Mistress should keep you safe and play safe. The use of drugs or alcohol during play is not safe because they alter perception and dangerous mistakes can be made.    Although what we do looks insane to the outside world, it can be very sane, and the bottom line is consent. Every thing we do is with consent. You never lose the right to consent. Slaves, let me be very clear. You always have the right to walk away. If a Master tells you different, he is not a Master but an abuser.    Next is what I believe and that is RACK. The R stands for risk. There is risk in what we do. No matter whether it is BDSM, M/s, or D/s, there is risk. Which brings us to the A. the A stands for aware. A Dominant/Master should make you aware of the risk you are taking. C=consent or Consensual, again I can not stress this enough. It is the foundation and cornerstone of all we are. Last, the K is for kink. Yes we are a very kinky people and remember your kink may not be someone else’s kink. But that is OK.      Communication is essential.  Keep in mind, a potential Dom/Master/Mistress cannot read your mind.  If there is something that scares you or that you are uncomfortable with, tell them!  If they are unwilling to listen and talk to you about it, run away!  Keep in mind that when a person is a Dom/Master/Mistress they are also human.  They will make mistakes.      Respect should be earned I am not talking about common courtesy. Being polite always makes you look good. But respect is earned. And a Dominant/Master should never demand it. If a Dominant demands this you should run. We command respect by our actions. And a Dominant should be willing to earn that respect. One last thought on respect, you should respect yourself. Self respect is important. If you can’t respect your self how can you respect someone else?   Trust is also earned. If someone is not willing to earn your trust, or if they demand your trust, walk away. You need to trust to have a good relationship. But trust needs to be earned. A dominant/Master should be willing to earn your trust   This is a great way of life or it can be. But it can be dangerous. It is used by abusers to abuse. It is used by pretenders and predators also. We wrote this to help keep you safe.  .  

I want you to be my teacher. I'll wear a schoolgirl uniform with a really short skirt, top and skimpy panties. My hair will be in pigtails to make me look really cute.   Ill come in asking for extra credit to pass school and in order to get it you tell me exactly what you want while you pull out your ruler.   I then hesitate and say I've never done this before so its time for you to teach me.    I put the tip in my mouth and hate the taste but you grab my head you deep throat me, unloading everything in my mouth.   I end up coughing it out but you grab my face and tell me to swallow and I fortunately do it.   You tell me to take it or I fail and I cant afford to fail. You then grab me and bend me over a desk with my beautiful rear in full view.   I try to pull down my skirt to cover my rear but you grab my hands and tie them behind me forcefully.   Im helpless as you lift my skirt and pull off my panties to unveil my virgin pussy.   You then mess with me and tease my pussy with your fingers and tongue before you tell me im ready with your throbbing ruler in full view   I beg you to stop but you spank me for talking back to the teacher. You then shove your ruler in me to to grade my pussy.   I have no choice but to take it while you keep fucking me from behind. You then rip off my top to mess with my nipples and maybe even give me the honor ot stroking me to drive me insane   Eventually after some time you unload in me as I experience your load for the first time as I scream in pleasure.    You then tell me to clean you up as I lick every last juice from you magnificent body and ruler, while I hear you give me my final grade.   I cant wait for our next lesson    

I want something more then to be just someone's casual side piece. Ideally, I'm looking for someone who likes and wants power exchange, rope/shibari, bomdage, impact and can deal with a sassy brat. Now, when I say sassy brat; what I really mean is I'm sassy and I know how to use my brain. I will call you out and use my brain to work around or get out of things... so be careful what you say.   I want someone who knows what they are looking for or at least has an idea of what they want. Intelligence is a good thing to me and if I can out maneuver you... we're gonna have a problem, cause I will wrap you around my finger. I am a strong indepent woman and it takes someone similar to truly keep me in line.   I identify with many things like rope bunny, submissive, middle, brat, masochist, pet and on the rare occasion slut. I'm sure there is even more, but it would take someone I could truly learn to trust to bring it out in me. I want to explore and find out what I'm capable of, like, want and crave... even if it pushes me outside my confort zone.    I need something real and tangible; someone who can push me in my limits but not take it to far or go to fast. With me it's not always what I say but how my body or mind may react to something. I have a habit of putting things into neat little boxes and putting them in their spot. But I want someone to mess those boces up and make me rethink the way I see things.   If you think this could be you... feel free to message me :).   P.S. I should say I do have an age range. No offense meant... I don't generally play with people over 45 as they tend to remind me of my grandparents and it feels akward/weird for me. I also don't generally play with people under 25 as I tend to end up getting put into a teaching or mentor role and that's not what I am looking for.

Here are a few things that I should have added to my profile but didn't and I don't wanna wait forever for it to be approved again. 1. Do not message me if you are not in my state, it clearly says in my profile I am looking for a Dom in or around my area. This means in North Carolina only (maybe as far as SC but I am not willing to travel). 2. Do not contact me if you are a sub or slave male asking me if I want to own you and you be my so called puppy. I am NOT into pet play and I have a real life dog that is already challenging enough, I don't need a human wannabe dog. I am also NOT a Domme, my name clearly says that I am sub and my profile clearly points that out.  3. No I will not do online with you, my life is very busy as is and sending me a message that says "when are you available" as your first one as well as you having no profile except that you wanna be please orally then yeah you're not getting a response from me.  4. If you think that all subs should be sexual to be in a dynamic move on, I know plenty who are in nonsexual D/s dynamics and they have been going strong for years.  5. Do not tell me that you want to mentor me yet want to play with me. A mentor never plays with who they are mentoring, the person being mentored is looking to that person for advice. If you think differently then don't bother contacting me.  6. Yes I am married, yes he knows I am in the lifestyle and yes he does approve. I have written this in my profile but it seems like it goes ignored. Just because I am married is not the only reason why I am nonsexual, I have other reasons as well.  7. Please stop asking if I have kids. Just because I'm married doesn't mean I do and the answer is no I do not and never want them. If your first message to me is "what's your availability" and you have a virtually blank profile then you will more than likely be ignored.

It's so funny when a person contacts you and insist on doing things their way and ignore what you ask for. They were so insistant on "their" way that  I even told them they are probably dominant, they claimed that they were definitely submissive.... NOW, just a few days later; alllll of a sudden you get a message saying that they don't think that we are a match (what I told them in the first few emails   LOL) and block me for some reason. I was nothing but nice to them.  Hate to tell them I get a lot of emails so I had to look at history to even remember who the hell they were so the block doesn't really bother me  lol   was just going to wish them good luck and to stop by and say hello sometime..... yes I'm so evil   LOL and NOW allllll of a sudden they change their profile to Dominant.....LOL   Sounds like someone just wants to jerk off so now we are going to try Dominant since no one seemed to fall for the "I'm a poor pitiful submissive" routine  LOL   These people make me laugh   LOL  

Jesus's love for you is so deep as that of a father and child and so intimate as that of a husband and wife. Jesus and the angels celebrate you turning to him. Like that of a dear friend coming back, more missed than they had realized. Give him your burdens he will sustain you. He will not let the righteous be moved. He is nurturing and practical. He is like a supportive parent, a supportive lover. He is fair, trustworthy, and gives you clarity not impartially but fully. Be fearless and have the courage to pursue a relationship with Jesus Christ. It's a journey, through all the valleys and mountain peaks but he is faithful to never leave you. He carries you. He strengthens you. He cares for you. He sees you. He hears you. Some things happen quickly and some things require time. Perhaps time to build your character. Build your endurance. Build your spirit. Build your patience. Build your wisdom. Some things are not meant to break you but to make you so strong and unrecognizable to your old self. Even in the dark there is a light and the light has not been overcome by the darkness. It cannot be. 

I am well aware of the nature of this site. A place where individuals indulge in their wildest desires and fetishes. However, I cannot help but ponder on the intricacies of my own desires. I do not find superficial compliments or shallow attempts at flattery to be of any interest to me. I am not impressed by those who claim to have read my profile, only to immediately express their desire to engage in carnal acts with me. It is possible that I have come to the wrong place to satisfy my true desires. What truly ignites my passions is the ability to engage in a meaningful conversation with someone. Discussions that range from the trivial to the serious, the playful to the flirtatious, and even the melancholy. The back and forth banter that flows effortlessly, covering a wide range of topics, from our personal relationships to the state of the world. And, of course, the subtle glances and touches that make us lose all coherent thought. Is such a connection still possible in this digital age? I often find myself questioning if I am living in a fantasy world. But, then again, the mere thought of it ignites a fire within me. Perhaps, someday, I will find it once more.

Another essential book for many people on this site is Bruce Bagemihl, Biological Exuberence: Animal Homosexuality and Natural Diversity, St. Martin's Press, 1999.  I'll bet many of you didn't know so many animals were gay and lesbian; relationships with one male and one female are not all that common among most mammals and birds.  There are lots of rapes in some species (like mallard ducks), something of interest to BDSM people.  There are also a few transgenders among animals, either those looking like neither sex (like velvet-horn whitetail deer), or those just behaving like the opposite sex (like a class of male bighorn sheep that act like females and hang out with females all the time -- but don't have sex with the females).  I found it funny that PBS lin 2024 broadast a Ken Burns 6-hour documentary on preservation of bison, but didn't have time to once mention that male bison are primarily gay, something many native Americans knew but European settlers never figured out.  Since the documentary focused on efforts to preseve herds starting in the late 19th century, putting all the males and females together in one herd as was often done doesn't work too well when most males are gay almost all the time. 

I'm a Marionette By Abba performed by Ghost    You're so free," that's what everybody's telling meYet I feel I'm like an outward-bound, pushed around, refugeeSomething's wrong, got a feeling that I don't belongAs if I had come from outer space, out of place, like King KongI'm a marionette, just a marionette, pull the stringI'm a marionette, everybody's pet, just as long as I singI'm a marionette, see my pirouette, round and roundI'm a marionette, I'm a marionette, just a silly old clownLike a doll, like a puppet with no will at allAnd somebody told me how to talk, how to walk, how to fallCan't complain, I've got no-one but myself to blameSomething's happening I can't control, lost my hold, it's insaneI'm a marionette, just a marionette, pull the stringI'm a marionette, everybody's pet, just as long as I singI'm a marionette, see my pirouette, round and roundI'm a marionette, I'm a marionette, just a silly old clown"Look this way, just a little smile," is what they say"You look better on the photograph if you laugh, that's okay""You're so free," that's what everybody's telling meYet I feel I'm like an outward-bound, pushed around, refugeeI'm a marionette, just a marionette, pull the stringI'm a marionette, everybody's pet, just as long as I singI'm a marionette, see my pirouette, round and roundI'm a marionette, I'm a marionette, just a silly old clown

Sub thoughts for a Domme; What pleasure means to me ... as a submissive man, pleasure, to me, is knowing that i am making Her happy, providing a service to or for Her, filling the role that She wishes me to fill, for Her and Her pleasure.   I can do or perform acts that bring me pleasure, but it is empty if She doesn't derive pleasure, happiness, amusement or satisfaction from it. I am always hoping to make Her happy or to provide something useful to or for Her. A disagreement about what type of food to eat, what movie to see, what we are doing for the day .. the bottom line is She will have the final say, the Control to determine those things and to exercise that power when and how She sees fit.   I am happiest knowing that She is happy. To make Her smile or see the approving look in Her face is all the pleasure I need and anything further beyond that is simply icing on the cake.   I think what it means to the exchange between a Domme and Her sub/slave is mentioned in the above, but essentially it means that my pleasure only exists and should only be possible if i am pleasing Her .. it is Her desires and wants that need to be met, and my ability to assist or aid in that brings me great joy and happiness, and is the only thing that really pleases me.   Self-gratification is nice, but hollow and empty as i am not fulfilling the desire and yearning i have to know that i am pleasing Her. I exist for Her pleasure and that is fulfilling.   I look forward to submitting my ego and desires to Her, for Her to guide, shape, influence and control.

Read a profile tonight.  The dumbnant said that he is looking for someone he can tell "what a piece of shit she is even in front of others even her family".What ever happened to "don't scare the nillas"?Vanilla people didn't consent to be a part of your dynamic. Even other kinksters didn't consent.Who are you to do what we do in front of non-consenting people, especially if it can have consequences for your partner outside of bdsm circles?That just screams to me of someone who is an abuser, not a dom.Prove me wrong. For some reason, won't let me spell d-u-m-b-i-n-a-n-t right ..

Someone male on the other kink site was talking about dating as a market, and when the "dick is plentiful" comment came up as a point of why it doesn't "sell" he got a bit butthurt.  When someone else tried to point out that dicks are generally attatched to men, and so the problem wasn't the dicks but the men they are attatched to, the quality of which vary a lot, he said "In general, a shirt is not necessarily better than another shirt"Which granted, is absolutely in my wheelhouse to respond to with an informed opinion, so this was my comment.   "Actually, as someone with an education in fashion merchandising/design, and as a costumer, I can say that is not at all accurate. Quality is an easily defined set of properties, such as the tye of materials used, workmanship, colorfastness of dye, functionality of design, etc and varies HUGELY from one shirt to the next. Which is why a shirt from the dollar store may be good enough for a few months, but may soon start to pull apart at the seams, or fade, or wear through, or shrink and become misshapen, etc. whereas a shirt that looks similar from a better manufacturer may last for years and still look fine. I have several shirts my Dad wore for years before he died, which I have now worn as an overshirt for gardening, etc for the two decades since.  I have also bought similar looking shirts new at Walmart and they fell apart within a couple years.   Quality matters. Being an educated consumer matters. Learning to recognize quality, and what to look for before you purchase is the difference between having to replace said shirts frequently, vs keeping something you like for as long as you want it, and possibly even passing it on if you no longer need it.   The same can be said for partners.  So it's important to understand what quality is in people, as well as shirts, and learn how to spot it and the lack of it, and learn to take your time shopping to avoid buyer's remorse. Or even debt and bad contracts...   "Maybe there are fuckbois who one can easily replace if that's what your view of men on average is." Exactly. There are fuckbois, and posers, and trash toys, and upstanding quality men. There are men who do the work to become better, to do the right thing, to play fair and self-manage, etc, and men that just wanna get dat dick wet. There are pretty people, plain people,  low quality people, high quality people, people who are pretty and cheap, people who are less pretty but quality, and vice versa.  You either learn to appreciate quality over superficial properties, or you bounce from crap to crap to crap, always wondering why nothing is ever as good as it looks and everything starts SO nice but never lasts.   As to what market? Dating is advertizing, more than anything.  You have what you have, and they have what they have, and you have to figure out what you want, and how to trade what you have for what you want. Fortunately, you can add to what you have in lots of ways, if what you want is out of reach at a given time. Learn new skills - dancing cooking, massage, etc. Dress better, spiff your appearance. Read books on relationships. Hit the gym. But you have to find out what THEY want, figure out if you can provide it (or are willing to lie about it, as many do) and then learn to explain how what you have will provide what they want.   As someone once said - you don't sell shovels, you sell holes.  "A customer’s ultimate goal is not a product but a change and improvement to their life. "   A man should not try to sell his dick to a woman.  Dicks are EVERYWHERE.  There are literally stores full of dicks that don't even require another person.  No matter how amazing a guy's dick is, I can go buy one better, and not have to bother with having a guy and what he wants attatched.   So, what a man needs to sell is *orgasms*.  And if he wants to be more than just a one-off, he needs to sell the aweome fun before and after the sex.  A submissive man needs to sell how he will make a Domme's life easier and more comfortable. A Dominant man needs to sell how safe and valued his sub will feel.   Sell the value point - how having whatever you are selling will improve the potential buyer's experience. Will is lessen the workload? Provide pleasure?    Increase security? Create comfort? Ease pain? Improve something they already enjoy?    THOSE are what need to be in someone's profile and first emails if they want to find their "market share" and get what they want here.

Okay, what is with mens profiles on here?  Is this a matter of the Collar Gods not updating mens profiles or journals?  Is it a matter of too many of them to approve? I dont recall engaging with one man here whose age is accurate lol  And we are not talking a year or two off, but typically a DECADE or more some times!  lol At least if your profile is not accurate, the least one can do is update in the first contact email.  I should think this provides the appropriate degree of honesty upfront, while also reducing time wasted for you if the person does not like your stats. As for Me, I could care less how old or young you are, with the exception of 20 year differences.  Those kind of differences need a wee bit more considering to the extreme differences/challenges these may pose). Also, what is with dominant men contacting Me and telling Me they are submissive/slave types, but they have no such information in their profile?  Make another profile or have something prepared to share in your first email.  DEMONSTRATE SOME BLOODY EFFORT, YA LOUSE! Facts are, I have gone to considerable lengths to share quite a bit about My motivation and vision.  Still that is not enough for the energy hoards.  Send pics they say.  lol  How about you tell Me what it is that I have written which speaks to YOU about Me and how you see YOURSELF SERVING ME.  How about you lay out all the mundane shit you are just dying to do in order to get a wiff.  Instead many begin with pics!  I get it.  Yet if we don't even have the makings of something which will work in the REAL WORLD, how come we need to see one another?  I'm54, Rubenesque, full figured, strong like bull.  What else?  Height?  Weight?  I'm a little above the average on both and stronger than any women I've known.  I have good teeth, wear glasses, have allergies, am quite fair, and am letting My long strawberry dirty blondish grey grow out.  I've hazel eyes and freckles, size 9.5 shoe, D cup and a large ass.  I've never had a surgery or broken bone. Type O positive lol  I'm shaved or hairy all depending on mood and My shit stinks lol The list of things could go on and on and it doesn't matter one fig in the long run.  What matters is that I get you and you get Me and we want to get IT together.  This is discovered by YOU DOING WHAT I REQUEST and Me honoring what you have to share with Me.  From there we both get to determine our suitability. Oh yes, and what is with the supposed slaves offering theirself for ALL?  I really don't get it.  If you offer all, you should be here already not phone-finger fucking Me. I'll tell you how My first introduced himself, got a picture, every alais I've got and is on speed dial on My phone.... wait for it.... in his FIRST email, he quoted My profile, commented on it and said why HE LIKED ME.  Wow!  There it is folks, the slave told Me what he liked from My profile! LOL When he asked how to proceed, I told him we move to another chat venue (NOT PERSONAL PHONE LINES).  He moved so fast I got whiplash! We typed some words and after a few minutes things started getting convoluted -as TYPING THOUGHTS OFTEN DOES. I told him it wasn't working for Me and it wasn't going to work for Me if we didn't speak by telephone.  BAM! - he said I could call him ASAP.  I called him and the rest is, literally, history. IF YOU CANNOT SPEAK BY PHONE I AM NOT INTERESTED. No where to go and time is a ticking! Newsflash, I am not going to work overmuch to get you to submit yourself to Me.  I am not a salmon or a trout.  If you can't take the heat, get out of the kitchen and if you cant come off the porch, you can't play with the big dogs. And don't get your hopes up, My tongue is worse than My lash...unless you are beloved and then you will get your just desserts!  lol

I am a bit concerned over the mail I get here on Collarspace.My profile CLEARLY states that I am a very happily owned bisexual slave.  I have been owned for eleven years. So why do all these male subs, switches and Doms mail me about becoming either their pet or serving me? I just do not understand. My profile seems very clear and concise to me. Are there that many Trolls that just resond to my pictures without even bothering to read my profile? Are these men complete idots who simply can't Master the english language? I am polite to people but I find these folks to be annoying. Please stop

I've had to narrow down my profile considerably so ive popped it in the below. But I have been here before for many years. Boredom brought me back; "A Lion still has claws, and mine are long and sharp My Lord,as long and sharp as yours."-GoT-RoC "That which yields is not always weak." ** Gideon Falls.** SAPIOSEXUAL ♌ About the Delicacy ♌ "Always more" I know what I want & I know what I need. These kind of sessions are one per every other month. I am seeking intensity above all, not only physical, but mental ( Please ask about that). The below still more or less describes me well, with little to update there! Suits attract me, a good cologne stops me ,intelligence will ensnare me.- I am a sapiosexual, know this. Understand this. \~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I will always play fire with fire. There is no turning back when you reach me. We will touch, and we will ignite and then the dance of two flames will begin. For you are me, and I am you. I will collect your sin, and you will harbour my shame.We will bury each other alive. I will hate you and love you for it. \~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ There is something beautiful in yearning. In wanting the impossible. To reach out and almost have it; to feel it upon your skin like the petal of a rose, only to be pricked by the thorn of disappointment, or hopelessness. To desire, what you can never have. A dance of wills, a tango of conflicts. To be humbled, and brought low by the simple word "no". To endure nothing, but everything in A simple moment. Passion-Patior(patï)-To Suffer This is what I breathe.   Alpha-Predatory; It takes a special kind of man to make me kneel. I am alpha by nature; what do I mean by alpha? I mean controlled. Independent, strong willed motivated (most of the time).I hunt predators for fun,with a depraved and unrelenting hunger. They are my speciality. I answer to no-one, but my conscience. And do only what my conscience dictates. I am in full control of my life, and everything around me has a purpose. Without the purpose or organisation things would crumble. I like organised chaos. It may not make sense to you, but it makes sense to me-and that is all that matters. Hey, I'm a Leo. What can I say. In every day life, I am alpha. Neither sub nor dom. Just a mode of personality which evolves with the surroundings I am in. I am the type who always needs to be in control of a situation, if not, things become complex. This is more then likely what you will see and notice when you first meet me. If you happen to find me kneeling infront of someone, it's down to two reasons: a mockery or said special man (my dominant), is around and has requested it of me. I will only ever truly Kneel for one person. That is my rule.

July 14, 2024 - Coach get raped again       Coach came over for another visit. It was a Sunday evening after I had worked and I was exhausted. But I always have time for some hot sex.   He arrived right on time and since he has visited numerous times before, I didn't bother to meet him in the driveway. I just opened the garage door which was his signal to come in.   During one of his first visits, I had a milk carton crate out in the garage with a sign on it that said, "useless pieces of human flesh need to strip and put all their clothing in the crate before entering" (or something like that)   Even though the sign is no longer there, he's into the habit of stripping naked in the back of the garage before coming through the door into the family room. I don't even bother to close the garage door since he is getting naked in the far back corner of the garage. When he entered the family room I was sitting in my chair and I stood up and we headed straight upstairs for some fun.   I laid down on my bed on my back and started playing with my cock. He didn't need an invitation, he knew I wanted my cock sucked. He slid onto the bed from the bottom positioning himself between my legs and latched on to my cock. I laid back enjoying the feeling of his warm mouth on my cock. Honestly, I just dropped off into daydreaming while enjoying the wonderful feeling of my cock going between his lips.   Occasionally I would reach down and guide his head to control the speed or depth of my cock down his throat. Sometimes I would throw my leg up over his back to pull him down onto my cock. Sometimes both legs up over his back locking his head into place as a bucked my hips forcing my cock into his throat until he would choke.   After quite a while I started wondering if his mouth, jaws, or throat were getting sore... But then I realized, I really didn't care. I was enjoying myself too much. read the conclusion at http://www.SirKel.top  

Effort and Results There are at least two parts to a slave's existence.  Effort and results.1. Effort is up to the slave.  At all times the salve must exhibit, even live in, effort.  Always doing the best it can with whatever resources it has, mental or physical, to achieve total involvement in the work assigned it.  This effort goes beyond duty, it is life incarnate for slave.  Nothing in slave's cognition takes priority over effort to please its Owner.2. Results are the province of the slave's Owner.  In fact, results have nothing to do with slave except how the Master may determine.  To judge results is God like.  slave is only related to God through its Owner.  It may well be slave has experienced life without an Owner.  This 'Ronin' state is the worst possible existence a slave can have.  One of the reasons for this is the freedom the slave has when it has an Owner that takes possession of determining the quality of results. As the Bible indicates the only man (person) free of God’s judgement is a slave.  Thus the slave needs to live in gratitude for everything.  This grateful slave state can never be 'assumed,' but, must always be expressed outside slave's brain in every thing it does and says.  Living in gratitude helps slave apply itself to effort at hand.

August 14, 2024 - Multiple visits from Sextoy69       Sextoy69 has been coming around for a while.  He loves to be tied to the bed and throat fucked viciously.     Probably about a year ago before tying him to the bed and throat fucking him, I started telling him to get up on all fours so I could play with his ass. We both enjoyed it.  I would start with a single finger, applying lots of lube, eventually working in as many as three and sometimes four fingers.   A couple times he let me fuck him with my cock. But since he never cleans out because he comes straight from work, once my cock is in his ass I can't stuff it down his throat. It's one of his hard limits and I respect that.  Definitely not a problem.   So most recently when he gets here, we head upstairs, we both strip, and he gets up on all fours on the bed. I've been using wider and wider toys to open his ass up while reaching between his legs and stroking his dripping cock. I'm usually playing with my own cock at the same time.  We both enjoy it.   In fact I found, I'm enjoying it a bit too much. I get so excited, I'm so aroused playing with his ass and my own cock, it's such a mental rush watching him push his chest hard onto the bed while pushing his ass in the air.   I've learned that I get so excited, that when it's time to tie him down to the bed and throat fuck him I don't last very long. Usually within 5 or 10 minutes I'm shooting my load down his throat.   Two visits ago, I told him we were going to skip the ass play. And I must have throat fucked him for 30 minutes. He likes being tied down tight. And he likes being throat fucked extremely rough. Since my cock is down his throat a safe word doesn't work since his mouth is full.  He knows to smack his hand on the bed frame three times and that's the safe word, or safe action. This tells me to stop instantly.  Not that he has ever used the safe word or safe signal.   So two visits ago, after skipping the ass play, I tied him face up on the bed to the four corners. I tied him tight. He likes to struggle. I like to watch him struggle. But he never turns his head away causing my cock to pop out of his mouth. He just enjoys struggling.   I throat fucked him so hard. I was vicious. There were times my cock would get so rigid that I would push it all the way down his throat blocking his wind pipe. Normally I can hear him gasping for air around my cock and through his nose, but this time I couldn't hear any air going in or out of his body. That's how far my cock was lodged into his throat.   READ THE ENTIRE STORY AT WWW.SirKel.top  

I'm just back from holiday... and it's been a few days. I woke up this morning feeling exceptionally horny and kinky. I'm at work until 5pm, and can't cum till then. Give me tasks or dares to complete before then to keep me horny and busting to cum. Anything posted by males I will consider... anything posted by females is non optional and must be completed before I can cum. Keep me horny and on the edge of exploding! Only 7 hours to go...

I always find female dominatrix BDSM boring.... Well, to be honest, I find female dominatrix BDSM boring. I mean, don't get me wrong, I can see why some people might enjoy it(not me), but it's just not my thing even to talk or suggest. For one, for what I can see and feel very repetitive against males and paranoid .we males especially straight heterosexual are target by other genders as maniacs, perverts and worse not trustable which i always find very offensive even if there are many idiots doesn't mean we all the same but further more is the attitude of others gender want hunting down straight heterosexual males;in my life i never done anything not consensual . It's like everyone is following a predetermined set of rules towards males just to get credentials and reputations , which doesn't leave a lot of room for creativity or spontaneity. Another thing that turns me off is the extreme nature of want to show their supremacy (when, how and with who) . Overall, I think it's important for everyone to figure out what they like and what they don't like in their BDSM experiences. Furthermore, I think that the stigma around male sexuality and the perception of men as potential perpetrators of sexual violence is untrue as not everybody are! As a straight heterosexual male, I feel that I am often unfairly targeted as a potential maniac or pervert, which I find offensive. The idea that there is a generation of women who want to hunt down straight heterosexual males is deeply offended me, especially as I have never engaged in any non-consensual behaviour in my life.

playing without permission She lays there naked covered up with just a sheet right hand inching to her soaked pussy finger finds it way to her throbbing swollen clit legs spread she gently rubs it she lets out a low slow moan her left hand gripping the bed she speads up rubbing the throbbing swollen clit her moans gets louder shes playing with no permission she feels naughty thinking and day dreaming of his hand around her throat squeezing and releasing as he speaks am i understood she doesnt dare to make eye contact the day dream is going so well she cums without thinking she moans louder and no one can hear her

Master's Writings Fundamentals: What Turns You on is Good & The Struggle Against Social Norms Far too often I find individuals hung up on their internal permission to lean into what turns them on. They’ve discovered this or that excites them, but due to baggage from social norms, upbringing, or who knows what prior learning or pressures they experienced in their lives, they struggle to allow themself the space or freedom to explore this desire more fully. It tends to lurk in the realm of things taboo, and frequently causes them feelings of shame, guilt, or a need to closet this part of themself off from the world and hide. I was chatting with a submissive the other day, who was struggling with a kink, they clearly found exciting, but felt immense guilt each time they approached it. They were essentially stuck in this tug of war between internal acceptance and desire fulfillment of this new found pleasure. This causing significant anguish emotionally as well as guilt for liking this new thing but knowing it was “wrong” somehow. As a person and as a submissive, they were seriously struggling with this both as a person and as a submissive. I believe there are some fundamentals that I believe are core to this conversation, both for them as well as for others who struggle similarly: Note: I will preface all of the following thoughts with the limitation that I am referring to pleasures, fetishes, kinks and actions that are consensual and safe for all involved.   Life is short, enjoy it however you can. I recognize this is a hedonistic view of things but life can be hard at times, I believe we should find pleasure and enjoy it wherever we can. What feels good, turns you on and brings you joy should be enjoyed. Pleasure is a very personal experience and as is the internal permission to allow yourself to enjoy the sensation. Seek out those pleasurable things and allow yourself to let them bring you happiness. Life is short. What turns you on is good and Social Norms are just other people’s opinion. Regardless of what that is. If it floats your boat, its a good thing. Never let anyone else tell you its not. Most of us were brought up with social stigmas around sex, gender, nakedness, and so on. We were taught by parents, church, media what is what is evil or wrong. Social norms, prejudices, stigmas, and things designated as taboo are passed on by others. We are brought up believing them and because of that, they hold power over us and they are hard to shake off. Yet, I believe, so long as it does not impact another person, you and you alone have the right to determine what is right and good for you. You hold solvency over your mind, will, and body. As soon as you can see feelings of wrongness, taboo, or evil, as opinions conveyed to you by others. As soon as you begin thinking, evaluating and choosing for yourself what is right, good and pleasurable, you will be ready to embrace “what turns you on is good”, and you will be open to far more than you could imagine. The journey of self discovery is an essential one. I believe discovering what you like and why you like it, is one of the beautiful journeys we get to experience as we enter the lifestyle. If we can maintain an open mind, open heart, and free ourself from feelings of guilt, shame, self judgment as we take this journey, we can learn more than we ever thought we could about who we are in life. There is an entire world out there of kinks, fetishes, aspaspects and combinations that may excite you, intrigue you, turn you on, or turn you off. Discovering these is a beautiful journey that goes far deeper than whether or not you like a thing. Understanding the why and the how, exploring what it is about a thing that speaks to you, brings a deeper understanding of who you are in ways you could never imagine. Learning Acceptance for others builds acceptance of self. As we discover our own likes and dislikes, we learn that what turns you on is not always what turns others on. Accepting ourself and our own personal preferences requires us to embrace the idea that YKINMKBYKIOK (Your Kink Is Not My Kink But Your Kink Is OK). Here in the lifestyle community, we don’t judge, don’t condemn, or shame what others enjoy, just as we would never want to be judged, condemned, or shamed for what we like. The vanilla world is full of instances of non-acceptance and persecution, but not here. Accepting others perspectives and desires as different than your own, helps you find acceptance for yourself, and is a powerful thing. When you can step outside yourself to see the struggle and understand it for why and why it is, you will be able to free yourself to understand yourself deeper and truly explore. To this submissive I spoke to, and others why may read this, I wish you a healthy, positive, and guilt free journey in the lifestyle. I hope you can embrace your pleasures fully and allow yourself to revel in them. As someone wise once told me, when you discover your “Freak Flag”, that truth you’ve found about yourself, Waive it high and proudly.

WARNING:  POLITICAL RACIST SEXIST DEFAMATORY PROFANE STATEMENTS FOLLOW! Keep OUR laws off of MY body. Or be prepared for US to start making laws for YOUR body. The only reason why it is not the law of this land that a woman may do with her body as she sees fit, is because MEN do not stand up for our rights as WOMEN.  Don’t play games with Me and tell Me you are all about respect for women and women’s rights and you LOVE AND WORSHIP women and then tell us we don’t have what if farking takes to govern our own bodies!  Bloody hypocrites! Don’t tell Me it is the politicians, women, men, or any other such thing which makes the law so.  It is because of YOU and your primitive mind set and ideologies which remove My Sovereignty over My body.  I’m an independent.  I am prolife and prochoice, when it makes sense and does not infringe on another free person’s rights.  You don’t get to choose what is right for My body.  You and the law HAVE NO BUSINESS IN OR ON MY CUNT!   God gave this Power to women.  We are made for it and with this God gave us the ability to deal with this Power – without Men.  Just like Men are given their own Power and the tools to appropriately deal with it. Now, if you continue to come after My body and My rights, be prepared for Me to come after you and your body parts. Any sexual or domestic offense committed by a male against a female, automatic SNIP SNIP!  You don’t want Me playing around with your cock and balls without consent?  Then STAY OFF OF MY DICK! Men competing in Olympics, or women’s sports.  This is a no brainer people.  We are a tad more civilized than legalizing and celebration of the beating of women.  Come on!

Haven't written anything in a while, and I had a quiet minute between tasks, so I thought I would write about a recent experience I had out in the wild. I had done a pop in at a Dollar Tree. I hadn't done anything special that day - no makeup, no sexy clothes, just my vibrant magenta hair and my bright orange mirror sunglasses. Maybe my hand bleached mandala design tank top was cool. So when a very bald guy walking my way kind of leaned toward me and told me really liked my hair, I said thank you, and casually commented that I also had some hair loss and the bold color helps hide that. He apparently took that as an opening, and asked if I was married, and I said I have a partner, and that we are "complicated." He asked what that meant, and I asked if he knew what polyamory was. He gave a noncommital sound like he wanted to seem like he did, and I followed it with saying that we are always open to new playmates if they are compatible. So he asked me about going for coffee sometime. I said I was open to discussing it and offered him my business card. Now, I designed my own cards, for goth costuming and art and such. They are mostly black and purple and lacy with gothic lettering.  And they have QR codes on the back to my Etsy and Instagram and email, etc. No numbers. He looked at it, turning it over and back, like he had no idea what I'd handed him.  He said "Let's skip all that and you give me your phone number." I said no, I don't really do phone calls.  So he hands me back my card and says "So you aren't really interested. Good luck with all that" and walked away with this smirk like he'd caught me trying to trick him.  At this point in my life, I can look at the whole thing and laugh. This is so common in my expeirence, but its still amusing to watch happen.  I was pretty positive this wasn't going anywhere when he first asked, but I was willing to listen to his pitch. But interested? No, I was not "interested." This guy did not look like Jason Momoa. He didn't talk like a heavy intellectual. Nor did he dress like anything more than your average rando - tshirt, long shorts, etc. He hadn't said anything, either, other than asking for my attention. He didn't ooze seduction or ... anything other than averageness, honestly. He walked up to a total stranger, made the barest effort, divulged nothing of use or value in the 2-3 minutes we spoke, but expected... something more from me. Then when I didn't make up the difference for him, he bailed and wanted to act like I'd led him on somehow with my simple failure to be rude, and basic honesty.  He was *INTERESTED.*  He was not in any way *interestING* on the surface. So there was nothing to be interested IN at that point.   But he wanted to be butthurt that I wasn't equally interested in him. I wasn't even snarky about the phone. Just not insecure about saying no. And he tried to turn it into something personal. Weak men are everywhere. Here, at work, in daily life, etc. Men who want something, and sometimes will profess great interest in getting it, but at the slightest bump, they flail and pout and throw up their hands and play helpless. Well, except when they decide to get violent about it. Which is why I carry pepper spray on my keys and a stun gun in my purse.  There's a tictok video where a woman expresses her frustration with men who want to complain that women all want '6 foot, 6 figure, 6 pack' and all we REALLY want is for you to be nice to us and feed us tacos. She's not wrong.  And I have a whole profile outlining what I want, and what I don't want, as well as countless journal entries laying out how to avoid pissing off me, and every Domme I know. And yet... It doesn't have to be this hard, guys.  Just don't expect us to make all the effort for you. 

Not looking for a long term relationship right now. Although one can never tell how and when relationships develop over time. More interested in meeting Ladies of our ilk who would enjoy the backseat of a Harley while taking in the countryside. Plenty of beautiful roads here in New Jersey, and neighboring New York and Pennsylvania. Great time of the year now. You up for a ride?

I have not been writing much in this journal but hoping it might just perk someone's interest. I just moved back from Texas and now living in Northwest Indiana. About 20 minutes from downtown chicago and live in Schererville just across the Illinois border. I have been on this site for many years unsuccessfully and still hold out hope to finally achieve my goal of serving a strong, Dominant Woman. I can assure You am for real and today the first of Decmember once again spending another birthday allone. I am not evil, and have met some off the site which has not amounted to anything . I am on Fetlife under subndyer and started to branch to other  sites. I still hold out hope on this site. Am a single submissive which can be molded into a slave who has been off and on in the lifestyle for about 20 years. I have no children , no wife , girlfriend, hell dont even have a dog. But can assure You my loyality, respect, obedience, and You happiness is first priority. If I perk Your interest please drop me a line would not disappoint

 I am pleased  to be very strict highly Disciplinary controlling to a fault and an everyday spanker   all for a girl like you If you are true servant a service oriented woman  who does her best please and thrives in a strict  and demanding environment so my goal here is in  your Ownership   based on TPE protocols all taught to you within a relationship of apparent  domesticity  and normalcy but strict rules  you will abide by within rules governing  as many parts  of your life  as I wish to take  into my hands  and put under my authority     you will have domestic duties and household protocols such as  dress rules your clothing choices  will no longer  be yours to decide..  your demonstrable humility as you serve..  no huffing  no puffing  no eye rolls…    everything you  are given to do  will be carried out  with your  Respectful Obedience  as its base  and as its framework    you will be helpful  useful and a  very well Disciplined woman  my use of you  will make you  worth the time  it takes to  keep you  and train you   and pls understand  there will always  be the strap  for you to deal with if you don’t do things as you are  expected to thank you for reading    and if your profile  describes a very  nice girl needing  a new home… a good home…  and much further education? do say hello..  BMcB ---------------------------------     so I am revising my  profile here as I reconsider  my needs of the moment  the bedrock for me  is the slave I wish to Own  for the long term  to possess  to guide  and control  down to her smallest details  the one I am after is  obviously service oriented  maybe even genetically so  a born servant?  very likely as there are  born slaves in my experience  she is a girl needing to be found and collared  then trained  and put to work  learning the lessons of her submission  and her best slavery  and put to work in domestic ways  made to earn her keep  tending to chores..duties..  and my whims…  …daily work requirements  with strict oversight of  not only what she does  but how she does it  she will have tasks  to complete even  if it is decided to  allow her to work  outside her home  and she will complete them  and satisfactorily  before she is permitted  to sleep she will be a pleasant girl  in all she does  and certainly in carrying out  all her domestic things  no huffing no puffing no eye rolling  she will be monitored  and overseen  in her free time  as well  and in another epoch  she would be understood  to be a scullery maid  recently come down from  derry or belfast I believe where she would be  not so much  banished to the basement  as simply located there  where she would cook clean  and make tidy  the lives of those she  was Owned by… and again all my slaves work will be carried out  under strict oversight  and a good hard caning  of her bare ass  for any disappointments  she will be permitted  very slight unsupervised time  in addition she will receive  training in basic Obedience  with Disciplinary inspirations attached  to ready her for confinement and service  in her eventual TPE lifestyle  her submission will be intensely  exploited and can enjoyed at anytime  she is available for the pleasure  and gratification of her instructor  mentor employer Master care taker Owner pick one!  and any others she  might be given to  for whatever pleasures  they might decide  to use her for  her cooperation in doing  whatever she’s been told to do  is fundamental to her  successful Ownership  and her training and use are envisaged as providing  much pleasure for all involved  except for the slave herself  and before I forget  her slave pussy is going to be  closed for business  and will remain so for her foreseeable future  however she will be ‘teased’ daily  and very intensely with her orgasms properly denied ...this is btw only the initial training  of a slave in service…  -------------------------- MstrB writing from nyc I am here to find an appropriate slave and to Own that slave I will only consider full Ownership and complete authority over the girl I will decide most if not all of the slaves affairs her life her training her education and her uses these are mine to decide and I will use them I prefer to be strict with a slave and I am close to being a lifelong Disciplinarian who enjoys judging correcting Disciplining I am well aware that servants need attention sometimes words suffice but more often the strap needs to be brought into the conversation the slave will be taught to concern herself with being helpful useful and pleasing and above all Obedient she is going to be a very useful girl for me and never ever make my wonder why I took her into my life to begin with MasterB  

I recently sent this to a few people who DMed me: "Did you send this to me by mistake? It reads as though you are in the middle of a conversation with someone else."   As it turns out, people are referring to journal posts I have made days, weeks or even months in the past WITHOUT AN INTRODUCTION EXPLAINING WHY THEY ARE WRITING TO ME.    It does not take much to preface a message with, "I saw your most recent journal post here and I think ..." or "I was doing a deep dive into your journal here and I noticed ..."   I do not re-read my journal every time I log on. My DMs are not the comments section of my journal. Indeed, journal entries here are not like forum topics where the the context is already obvious.  So if you write me about something I posted to my journal and I have no idea what you are talking about, now you know why I sent you that type of reply.

Instead of getting mad at Me for knowing what I want, you should look at what you are doing. It is not a submissive's gift to project their fantasies onto a Domme. If you are unsure of what that means, feel free to ask. I'm not sorry if holding My Boundaries upsets you.

Time to put out another...message in a bottle.  If you are going to contact me;  Be polite. Politeness costs your nothing. And it shows manners.  Be consistant. If you want to know all about me, and ask questions, then reply to my responses in a timely manner. If you don't have further interest, kitten is a big girl and you can just say so.  Be honest. I don't want to have to ask you 50 questions to finally get you to fill in the bigger picture of your wants and needs, OK? We can be flirty and fun and joke around, but we both should have an appreciation for and skill in using direct honesty. Be informed. Did you read my profile and my journals before contacting me? Fantastic! That's the best place to start!  I will, of course, be the same! I'm looking for someone wonderful and sexy just like you!  Thanks in advance!   

one potential ending    Now, My darkest desires proceeded to being fulfilled.  SLAVE start the slow process of getting all the things needed.  You hear clanks, scrapes, thuds, grunts and painful cries.  What to make of all this, starts to run through you mind.  Locked up in bounds on the bed, pinned down, spread eagle, arms like a cross… completely vulnerable. The blind fold is placed back on, and you put up a little bit of a fight. But to no avail you loss, but then again you expected that. But just not as quickly, for there were a second set of hands that were helping with the blind fold.   The cbt is still on, and the pain is becoming more intense for you.  But I’m in no mood to give in to your whimpers.  I say, ladies next please.  Now you start to realize the fear that has begun to grow within you.  You hear the rustling of the girls; giggles and loud noise all of what is now making you try to free yourself from the bounds that hold you dear.   Now back on the bed, SLAVE lays down beside you, caressing you body, up and down, making you slip into a state or relaxedness.   Then while the moment of peace lasts, you hear a soft click and a rush of cold air; gliding up the length of your shaft for the cbt has been lifted off.  With a sigh of relief, like you just had the biggest orgasm you have ever had… little did you know what was coming your way next.  With that first sigh, that escaped from your lips, was the last time you were going to experience that feeling.     You hear some more giggling and some sharp sounds.  Then there is a light smell of something you could not place.  As your mind ponders what that smell may be, for its something you’ve smelt before.  Again, your mind wonder and ponders away but is quickly brought back to the present by the sucking sound you hear.   As your mind slips back to the moment, you feel this wet softness along your inner thigh. Kiss, nibble, licks, nibbles, and a bite, the sharp piercing pain shoot’s right up your body. You let out a yelp, sounding like a puppy, with a loud and crisp.  “Well, well, well, we can’t be having that now, can we?” I said.  With a load voice, almost chill defining.  SLAVE gets up and went into the back room and came back with a large ball gag.  Since you were blindfolded still, you had no idea what was going your way.  SLAVE lay down on the bed and began to caress your body.  Soft, slowly and methodically, she worked over your body piece by piece. Till she reached your face, then the touched changed, but still were soft and caring.  She caressed your lips with her fingers, carefully taking her time, centimeter but centimeter she glided her fingers over your bottom lip.  Lost in the moment, you begin to moan and lost sight of everything, time, space, reality, everything what was happening right in front of your body and soul.   Still confused by the feeling of SLAVEs fingers, which were warm, supple, loving caressing touch lingered in your mind.  Your moans and body language started to change.  Your heart was racing, breathless to speak or move. No words could be found or describe what you were feeling.   Next you fell something cool, wet, and soft. With you mind slowly drifting back to reality; you try to assess what the feeling maybe.  And with a blink of an eye it was over. The soft, luscious, lips of SLAVEs touched yours and it was a little taste of heaven in an instant.   Then in another flash there was shock, for now you felt the large ball of the ball gag graze your lips.  You instinctively opened your mouth, knowing full well that you shouldn’t.  Then the ball gag slipped in and the light smell of SLAVEs body sent could be smelled to your nose, carried lightly on a breath of wind. You fill your senses with that scent, as the gag is being fastened to you. The ball is almost too big for your mouth, but it what “I” want. I don’t want to have the world hear you moan, for what is coming next, so I state.  xxbeautifulxliexx 

I used to love whoring and slutting around. There wasn’t anything quite as fun as finding a new cock to play with – I was always thrilled at how fast I could get a guy hard and how hard I could make him cum with my mouth or my cunt. Fucking was the only time I felt genuinely confident in my 20’s. A lot of that came down to Kevin. I belonged to Kevin (on and off) for over a decade. He was my first D/s relationship, and his primary focus and kink was whoring me out. He loved having me be an absolute filthy fucking slut for him, and the confidence and power I felt in that role over time was incredible. Through him, I learned how much power a woman could have in herself by submitting to her own sexual desires. It wasn’t just that Kevin loved having me be a whore (as much as I wanted to think that was my sole purpose at the time), I fucking loved sex and I loved the attention and desire I felt from men in those moments. I loved the strength and confidence I gained from their desire; it was a strength that lasted a lot longer than the encounter did, that’s for damn sure. I didn’t need their reassurance or their attention after. I didn’t need them after, period. I got my reassurance from Kevin. His praise and enthusiasm for my behavior reinforced the strength that I gained and reinforced my confidence in my skills. I didn’t have shit for confidence walking down the street or walking into a party to be around strangers, but the second I was presented with a hard cock, it was Game. Fucking. On. THAT I knew I could handle with perfect confidence, grace and skill. And I fucking relished every moan, groan, sigh, gasp, and trembling muscle from the man I was with. In my 20’s, I was somewhere around 340-375lbs. I didn’t really get on a scale very often, so I honestly don’t know how much I actually weighed. What I do know, is that it was Kevin who taught me that my size didn’t preclude me from being desirable. When I moved to “the big city”, I had the opportunity for basically unlimited male attention, which was a first for me, having grown up in the middle of nowhere Nebraska. Kevin encouraged this exploration, but also gave me very distinct rules and boundaries (he’d more than learned by that time that I had no idea how to establish, let alone maintain, my own boundaries). He made me go to Planned Parenthood to get my birth control shot. He “gave me permission” to tell guys to fuck off if they didn’t want to use protection for sex; I could ‘blame my Owner’ if they were at all hesitant. Having all this attention from all these different guys, never having to go more than a few days without sex if I didn’t want to, god – it was fucking incredible! And in the background, was Kevin, telling me what a fantastic little whore I was. When it came to being with Kevin, it was an even bigger reassurance. He told me once, during a moment of extreme insecurity, “I don’t give a shit what you look like, Lisa. What I care about is control.” I knew I could give him that better than anyone, the question was, did he actually mean it? The short answer is, abso-fucking-lutely. When my stunning beauty of a roommate (who’d played with Kevin over the phone and online multiple times) joined us one night, I figured it was going to be game over for us. She was a knock-out compared to me and way better at everything sexual than I could ever dream of being. He was choking her with his dick and she freaked because he wouldn’t let her control the pace or how far down her throat his cock went. She jumped up and took off out of the room to go smoke a bowl and calm down and he called me over. Despite her naked self standing mere feet from him, perky ass and tits on full display, he was totally soft. The second I put his dick in my mouth and let him choke me to his hearts content, he was rock hard and having the time of his life. She eventually came back to the kitchen table where he was sitting while I sucked him off, and I remember feeling an unbelievable surge of pride as he praised me, telling me what a good girl I was, how much he loved choking me and making me cry, how pretty my tears were. And when he finally came in my mouth, I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that for some men…it really is all about control. And I was officially hooked. That was all I wanted from that moment on, and to a large extent, it’s still all I want. Especially when it comes to any type of D/s dynamic. I don’t fucking care about the sex, whips or chains…I want the man who gets rock hard simply because I love to obey, to give up as much control as possible. I want the guy who gets off leaving me a list of chores to do in the morning and is way more turned on by me having completed the whole list plus some, then having to “punish me” because I failed to do those tasks. I want the guy who’s dick goes soft because a girl tells him ‘no’ (and he would never dream of pushing her beyond that ‘no’), but he gets hard as steel, instantly, because where someone else says ‘no’, I say ‘yes please and thank you’. I don’t need gymnastics and props…they can’t do anything nearly as good as a hand in my hair and a deep voice whispering in my ear.