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Alliteration, my ass. i invented it. |
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submission
Fly to Fly through Fly beyond it like it didn't exist.
But then it did a twist somehow ending in itself - a pretzel. The ouroboros to my temple.
~dirtydarling |
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The sunset is rapid i will miss the intensity of blazing orange and rusted yellow. Hints of glorious red and hued pinks dissapearing; retreating fast the orb. Just one blink and half a century was lost behind the soft slopes of purple hills. Now, only a few clouds speak of what was once here. Their imperfect shapes reflecting a blaze of fire that hides in silence.
i cannot handle Your silence. i will faithfully wait for You to rise and return.
~ dirtydarling |
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Misty mornings may multiply Bringing bashful beginnings before The tainted teasings Of our ocular Eyes. Everything else evolves, even Life. Love listfully lingers like lust... Bursting bubbles beneath boiling bases Of our ocular omens: Misty mornings. May i idle in idolization Of You
~ dirtydarling |
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i know You didn't fathom my affinity, or maybe couldn't or wouldn't face the fabulous fabrication of my feelings when i fumbled over You.
But i know You saw me. And that was enough in myself to feel like flying.
~ dirtydarling |
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Growing out of touch With myself - This is me; trying to stay afloat and trying to stay on this boat and cling to a motivational quote and a big fat jolly emote. Trying to put on my sugar coat and Keep this sicknote in my tote, as i deepthroat Another dose of this world's useless antidote.
But then this is me when You touch me; i sing notes in octave C And become a born again devote to your lifeboat of keynotes, And i realize all along my scapegoat Was an incredible sinking u-boat.
~ dirtydarling (8.27.23) |
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You say You are concerned when i say i am cornered in my thoughts, crafted by cornerstones of my sins and demons and shadows. You say it is cold in here when i say the fire still claims the corners of our house. You say You are going for a walk when i can't even find a door. You say i need to be tucked in when i am concerned about You never returning, taking my heart with You tucked away and forgotten in Your pocket. You say that time will heal me when i say that this time was my last time, for this life time. You say i will be just fine when i say you are my world.
-dirtydarling |
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I know what I know that you will know how, because...
I know what I feel when all songs lead back to you, slavery is real.
-dirtydarling |
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September 2022
Please forgive me when I lie awake at night thinking about my plight that seems to exist between the cracks.
A setback. A throwback. A monumental slight to my almanac of what it ought to be between you and me.
What does it mean when you say you forgive... but then do not give back to me the place at your feet.
It feels like heat. If feels like exile on Main St. It feels like a heartbeat that is nearby incomplete and stews bittersweet nothings into the backseat.
Is it defeat?
~dirtydarling
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Love degrading, deeply separating My distances of dark pride. Daring This daggered being to a death of Identity. Damn me. May the dawn Draw dyed lines of words upon my Dunes. May You, God of my dragons, Declare me as Your dirty darling. Where decadence decades these Daymares of independence Where You define my worth, for this Dance of ours deepens our freedom Day and night, dusk into dust. Divine Dreams. - We finally begin to exist.
dirtydarling |
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Tell me like it is, like a lover, what it is you long to discover. Tell me what is your inspiration, where it is you find heart to listen. Tell me where you go, understanding, when you find a space while philand'ring. Tell me when we go, go like passion, how we go, go like flame so brazen.
'cause I come into this place eager to recieve your peace I come with my kindled heart burning to recieve your part on my knees to your altar so proud of this one collar
So tell me about the raw darkness; Your teachings and the path of service, about dreams and deep irations, and all about tall fascinations. Tell me how you want to strip me down, hold me down, decrown, and help me drown
myself in your grand splendor, where I am in surrender To your profound, splendid mind. And in submission I find myself in absolution, freedom and transformation.
~dirtydarling |
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You are a set apart, State of the art, Work of art. That is written into my birth chart, To be your sexpot. To bask in your sunspot And become empty like a brain fart. To exist as your pleasurebot; Drive your applecart Into my fertile seedplot. Every single body part Is tailored to be your playspot. I yearn for your cum shot Into my honey pot, And for the squeeze of a slipknot That will sting like Cupid's dart And for the most important part To be unto you a decadent slave heart.
~dirtydarling |
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I am not afraid of being buried alive. I am only afraid of being buried alone. |
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The sun shining subtly on a side of this sin is like a sound in my insides that shimmer with silence. Silence that strain to see the stars. And soon this season will shift away, and my sadness will slither southbound with these strenuous sufferings. I may bask in the sun, but those stars sing my song. Someone may scoff at this small bird, but I dare souls to reveal their sub scrip tions. I might be seized in a straightjacket and my sex deprived, my song stolen, and my stimulation snuffed. But this sum is still greater than most dull lives. This is how a songbird thrives. But lo, this is no ordinary songbird. This is a phoenix, singing its pleasure behind a mask of silence, and setting aflame her significance in favor for ashes.
~ dirtydarling |
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Adieu
Yes, maybe it is true. Yes, maybe it is true that maybe i am blue. maybe i am blue, and maybe it is because of you. You were on the venue. i took the cue, and gave what was due, but you didn't follow through. i was at your pew, face to your shoe, You left me like a whoop-de-doo; You didn't renew, You didn't rescue, my confidence in you has flew, askew. There will be no break-through, no rendezvous, no well-to-do point of view. This is World War Two, thank you, and i wont argue how bitter i stew, or how i feel a devalue in your discontinued virtue. Because now, i see you now at face value. And now i cling to my own Bellevue - my own worldview - And i shall paint her deep blue, because yes, maybe it is true, maybe it is true that maybe i am blue, and maybe it is because of you, mind you - my dear Safeword, Adieu.
~ dirtydarling
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I saw a comet flying by. I reached up to touch its excellence and it answered me. I am forever a changed creature. 8/9/22
~ dirtydarling |
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drown it once drown it twice drown it a third time hope it stays down this time this is what i do when i think about you on this day and everyday and everyday since You've left the imprints of your ghost. i always said you were not like most.
~ dirtydarling |
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I'm sorry to my lover. I'm sorry I'm so unrefined; to leave all the things we had behind. No one has a smile For a ship sinking a mile, Or a satellite gone astray. So I say. I sow sorries. Across these distances; I should have stayed in your embraces, liberating me. I know you wanted to save me and hold me - wash my sins away. But I run away. So you say. No one can be our witness, No one can understand us. And when we misunderstand each other we become pointless. I am not saying I know why. I am not saying I can justify or rectify a goodbye. But I already miss you and these sorries are bearing a cost. I am so lost without you, And feel my sorries are pointless, too.
-dirtydarling |
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I have eyes only for You. They say that is how it ought to be for a submissive like me. So they say...
They also say You misunderstood me. They say You didn't see me. They are saying You were wrong. That Your patience ran dry. ...You are only a man. ...You gave up on me. ...You failed me. ...You abandoned me.
But I still have eyes only for You.
damn me. |
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Maybe it could be That You could spoil me By putting me on my knees. And just maybe, give me A lovely reward of a weighty load And drown me in Your Honey. And then, don't let it end, but Find ourselves on the bed, With kisses and caresses and Kind declarations, with 'Keep me close' promises, and whispered wishes. Make me sigh, make me fly, make me swoon so close to You That i melt and fall for You. Even split me apart, Oh yes! Open my secrets, Invade my hot depths and ram me with a sequence of wild screams that wont leave my dreams. Maybe it could be That You could spoil me Just like this, my Lover, and somehow do what You do that drifts me out to discover the hidden, undercover delights of a bottomless sub-space. Because feeling my place is a state of grace, gifted most favorably. Maybe it could be That You could spoil me by setting me free.
~ dirtydarling
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A Wild Blue Yonder Found her soul, Mapped it with stars, And called her beautiful - She knew she was. But not everyone knew. So little child of wild blue Wanderings drifted quietly Along, Dawn by Dusk. Waiting to be discovered. Longing for her Lover.
And Wondering if Wolves Loved the stars;
Loved them enough to Leave the Moon
And take adventure within The zodiac of her soul. For that is all she ever wanted; A Wolf to howl at her beauty - and by His ravenous Love, A Wolf to set her free.
~ dirtydarling |
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They say you are bad and They say I am blind, But we are hotter than a fantasy. They say I am a trophy and They say you are a gentleman, But we burn it down at night. They say you like it dark and They say I like my hair down, But they have no idea, really. They say I like it intense and They say you like taking chances, But they all dream about being us. So, What is she to you? What is she to you?
~ dirtydarling
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I need something real Because I feel too fragile; Too pieced together and Stretched out a mile that Anyone can chip away at This glorified, mucked up bile.
Maybe it is about time I am reconciled To this lifestyle of Us.
~ dirtydarling
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He said write a poem about poems, and what can I say about that? I don't search for poems. Poems come and find me. I take heart to listen; To their branches at night, Their Forgotten wings, Their substance in nonsense. They stir my soul and I am compelled to seed their notions of beauty. So I answered and said I shall write a poem about You then, my Love. You came and found me. and since then I've been doing nothing but listening to Your beauty; Of the words in Your silence My need for Your guidance The life in Your Darkness. You are a Poem That stirs my soul, And I want nothing more Than to love You more. You are my Poem So I shall write about You. Most passionately.
~ dirtydarling |
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Keep me precious like a secret weapon. Keep Our secret safe, and keep me close to You. Because I see the day when those planets align; - when the time is ripe, and when Your Kingdom comes - that I will alight the world on fire and burn it all down to dust. All in Your Name, and All for Your pleasure.
~ dirtydarling |
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There is thunder between Us and between the skies when We come together. when I'm on Top it doesn't stop. My eyes drink in Your depths, My hands devour Your hair, My lips lock with Yours, My soul is in Your soul. And for eternity We remain like this, as One. We just want One Another. And as selfish as We are, We take what We want. We take Our time. I grind with Your control, You feed on My surrender. Each Release is accented by bursts of lightening, - by cracks of thunder. And only then... We decide to taint lowly souls in the Eclipse of Our Love. Because no one else matters when lightening shatters and thunder quakes the skies between Us. When We come together.
~dirtydarling |
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There are no need for words right now because i have melted into You. All that is left to do is to watch everyone else melt into You. |
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Many may love You, but i was created to. |
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i dream of You all the time. Even when i am with You. Even when i am with You i am dreaming. i am caught up in the swell of clouds where rainbows are birthed. where the air is thin. where thunder is king. where the wind is Your plaything. i dream of You all the time.
~ dirtydarling |
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Don't call me attractive. Instead, call me HOT. Don't call it sex. Call it rape. Call me Your doormat, Because I am more then a slave. Call me Goddess, Because only You can keep me in chains. Don't call me alpha. Instead, call me First. Don't call it abuse. Call it love. Call me Secure, After I have tasted abandonment. Call me Your Victim, After I have been secure. Don't call me beneath You. Instead, call me WITH You. Call me Your slave, and then call me Your wife. Don't call it selfishness. Call it entitlement. And as Your eyes call me Love, Be sure Your voice calls me Cunt.
~ dirtydarling |
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Lay me at the throne of Your heart. Because, Like no one before...I love You more.
~ dirtydarling |
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This night will be eternally Ours. Love - We bestow down on each of Us, below. Our souls infuse; ever strong Serpent, and ever rising Phoenix, This will be Our dynasty. We will grasp this night as Ours for eternity. Because eternity belongs to You, and what is Yours is Mine to embrace. No need to race, Let's just stay in this place with each Other's face graced with kisses and reminisce how bygone and eternity can serve Us everlasting tranquility. Forever.
~ dirtydarling
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i need a friend, who wont make things complicated. but i don't want a friend.
sounds complicated?
Well, it is. |
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It will be 5 shades past yesterday, midway through a holiday and away beyond latter-day Before You weigh in my dismay. Even my dolce foray, my gourmet lingerie, and my gay obey - everyday - You will downplay. A foundation will mislay Between U.us, someway, a causeway will sashay seaway Because a hurt like this is a slow decay. And one workday on a Thursday, as You concoct a soufflé for Friday eve, i will be in a flyaway Chevrolet head'n down a straightaway to get away. and i will pray That You can/will partway the milkyway to bring back to You my heart, gone astray.
~ dirtydarling |
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i doubt Your sincerity. i doubt Your genuinity. i doubt Your ability with longevity. But i am reminded when i doubt You How much i am nothing without You.
~ dirtydarling |
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In the brisk of the night, in the heat of Your lust, in the stillness of the dark; when Your eyes glance over the stars above; i do pray, please pause. Feel my ghost, and think of me. For my own blue eyes see the same bright stars, and my heart is beating for You.
~ dirtydarling |
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Do understand He ushers me into a life of absolute surrender. Should i take a stand against His hand He will never fuck me again. Then enters fear. Imminent pain; strain on my heart at becoming apart from Him. This is my ball and chain. Now, knowing this...it is half my battle. The other half lying somewhere with some self-righteous act. He knows this too. He knows this too well. He works me against myself. He plays me, with power and control, and i get so fucking wet at feeling His hands on my soul, taking me for a stroll, His mind in my glory hole, making me feel so whole. So just fuck me again. Rape me asunder. Choke me with a ball and chain because i am going under into a life of absolute surrender.
~ dirtydarling |
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Submission is born of strength. Surrender is born of weakness. Submission is a choice. Surrender is a lack of options. Submission is the beginning of peace. Surrender is the end of war. Submission means pain can begin. Surrender is only meant for pain to end. Submission is freedom. Surrender is to be controlled beyond your will. Submission is given to someone you love and respect. Surrender is give to someone you loathe and fear. Submission is active. Surrender is passive.
~ source unknown |
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'to remain in God's heart for too long is to court destruction' He said.
'i know.' she said. 'Permit me this dance?'
For there was no other path in the heights of her sight, Nor anything that had ever felt so right. |
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i have no words for this poem. The words i need do not exist.
i searched the sky for something to describe Your high Magnitude; for something intense, like the mood of the altitudes as they collide in their blues; subduing chartreuse, and stripping her nude in such lewd, singing preludes.
i searched the heavens for something comparable to Your Majestic Deity. For something golden, like the fealty of the Trinity, or the anxiety i feel at the promise of eternity, royalty, and virginity.
i searched the universe for something close to the grandness of Your Nova. For something deep like the aroma of a black hole, or the pulsing cornea of a nebula.
i even searched hell. i searched for something akin to Your dark nature; like the vapor of a stagnant glacier bearing down across an acre of strangers. Your cold razor of abuse - my Creator and Maker.
i just have no words for this poem of worship, love, and praise.
i will just spend my days, amazed.
i will just be still, silent, and in awe, and listen to my knees seesaw the ground as You pound my mind.
i will take comfort in the sounds of slurping; my mouth wrapped in a bind about Your Cock. my world in shock.
And i will hope my silence is enough testimony of deep worship and awe... i will hope that my silence and service is enough to pleasure You, a God.
~ dirtydarling |
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It is good to have this distance between U.us, right now. Because if W.we were face to face...
i would SLAP You. As hard as i could, right across Your cold, hard face.
i would slap You for hurting me so deeply, i just want to hurt You back. i would not even think twice about doing it. It would just happen.
And then i would stand my ground hotly - and plea with my inner demons - Search Your eyes for a soul, Search Your face for an answer, and feel my mouth quiver as it suddenly realizes i slapped You, my Love.
That would be about the moment when You would grasp my neck in Your palm. Squeeze. Slam my back against a wall. Jam Your knee between my legs. Bruise my breast with an aggressive squeeze and...
Kiss me like never before. Kiss away my hot anger. Kiss me, overwhelmingly. Kiss me because i am Yours.
Then rape me, and help me remember that i don't need answers for the hurt You've caused. i only need to be used and abused.
But this is no Hollywood - and i have no one to slap, right now.
~ dirtydarling
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Shades Of A Valentine Crises
Why must the flames Burn as red? i have never hated Anything so much. Is red a shade of pink? Is pink a shade of red? i don't care. Not my affair, anymore. i will strip you. Ban you from my heart. In fact it has already been done. Goodbye pink heels. Goodbye pink skirt. Goodbye pink gloves. i will turn up the heat Turn your red into icy-hot white, Turn you from my sight and leave, love undone. i will not shed a tear. your ashes will go everywhere. i will burn you alive. Why? Because the hurt is enough to burn down the world. the hurt is enough to start anew And forget about you.
Now if only memories would melt. I might then find some strength to pick myself up from where i've knelt.
That is the problem with Him, He made Love feel so grand. Even satan WANTS his victims. i don't understand.
why i am not wanted. It is a good thing i can remain sane, otherwise i'd put aflame much more than just plain, pink undies
~ dirtydarling |
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When i saw you i thought He would like you. you, i thought, would make Him want me. you and Him are meant to be. you and Him on me how fun this would be, i thought. i never thought when i saw you that He would not want me. He just doesn't want me.
So now when i see you i ask why doesn't He want me? me, i thought, in you would be a nice gift. But now it wouldn't be so nice if He just doesn't want me, would it? So i will just cancel you, receive my refund, and think about those days when i thought He liked me and when i thought He would like you.
~ dirtydarling |
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There is no other way to cope with a Monster then to just lay there and take it.
~dirtydarling.
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It is humanly impossible, my God, to believe in Your lies and crave Your sadism. This is why i pray for You to dehumanize me, and create in me a creature who can.
~ dirtydarling |
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"Sometimes you need to bleed in order to realize this is your life." |
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Respectfully, Newton's Law of Gravity 'what goes up must come down' seems not to apply towards my Master's Cock, Ego, and Predatorial Hunger. |
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i am a girl that is pretty dumb towards football. Right? But even to me, it is obvious that the Kicker is a different breed of a football player. i can imagine how different the football game is to them (their preparedness, training, approach, mentality) compared to everyone else. And should a Kicker have a conversation with an Offensive Tackle position, are they even on the same page with each other?!
Gee, i feel so disconnected when i have a conversation with someone who is obviously a bdsm kinkster and not a bdsm lifestyle[r]. No matter how hard i try, i just cannot connect with them. And i've realized i don't even try, these days! i am coming to a conclusion based upon experience that kinksters are just a different bdsm breed.
What are Y.your thoughts? |
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excuse the profanity please, and the randomness, but i just fell on my ass and it fuck'n hurt. |
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i wonder if i am smart enough to disappear and never be found. |
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'Cause you're a sky, 'cause you're a sky full of stars I'm gonna give you my heart 'Cause you're a sky, 'cause you're a sky full of stars 'Cause you light up the path
I don't care, go on and tear me apart I don't care if you do, ooh 'Cause in a sky, 'cause in a sky full of stars I think I saw you
'Cause you're a sky, 'cause you're a sky full of stars I wanna die in your arms 'Cause you get lighter the more it gets dark I'm gonna give you my heart
I don't care, go on and tear me apart I don't care if you do, ooh 'Cause in a sky, 'cause in a sky full of stars I think I see you I think I see you
'Cause you're a sky, you're a sky full of stars Such a heavenly view You're such a heavenly view
~ Coldplay
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When it rains look for rainbows.
When it's dark look for stars. |
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Dear Mrs. Hillary Clinton,
....among the list of other things i disliked - women were never meant to rule a Nation.
my sincerest, dirtydarling
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Everything in the world is about sex except sex. Sex is about power.
~ Oscar Wilde |
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You can have obedience without submission but You can't have submission without obedience.
i would think that submission is greater, by definition.
BUT, just because something is greater doesn't mean something is needed. Many have told me that obedience is all they need. Therefor, they believe, obedience is greater.
Do You Dominate by love, or by fear? The pattern follows; those who Dominate with love believe submission is greater. Likewise, those who Dominate with fear believe obedience is greater. Either way is neither right nor wrong.
So which works for Y.you?
Personally, i need both love and fear; the 'submit by love' for all those reasons that seem right, and the 'obey by fear' for all those reasons that seem wrong. |
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when others fall one enthralls, each protocol heralds me into a glory hall where venus' throne is above all - others call for You, little tatters may cum, but venom festers a landfall of rot. And, if it is zero what is me? Infinity. A huntress robbing hope, faith, and bliss. recall the rue in this truth; don't miss, a thorn stuck deep in dump. away all chicks and dicks - fade before nyx. And that playboy toy, maidlyn the Barbie, will never be as true as Your joy in me.
~ dirtydarling
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Enter this exhibit, dear Serpent; - it exists to be enjoyed. Upon these eyelashes eggs Your empire. - expanding evermore, Empower these equators, dear Serpent. They endure Your exotic embrace. They quake, exalting. They explode, embalming Your path. They exude, endearingly. Exhausted they expire. Evening oust excellent Serpent. Edible ears enveloped in Your snares my my, eager echoes... Rape enough elementary enterprises to evangelize, evil Serpent, please... Then let's do it again.
~ dirtydarling
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Her opinions no longer matter; not because they have been degraded away, but because they simply are not Master's opinions. Her feelings no longer matter; she has learned they will lead her astray. Her fears no longer matter, not because she has conquered them, but because she knows Master will see her through them. Her inabilities do not matter because they have no face in light of Master's instructions. Her dreams, hopes, and interests no longer matter. Master defines her dreams, possesses her hopes, and encompasses her interests. She has thoroughly realized that anything from 'self' does not matter. Master is ALL, and everything that matters comes from Him. she is Owned, and there is no greater bliss to be found for a slave's soul. Thank You, my God.
~ dirtydarling |
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You can't pour from an empty cup. |
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tonight my flesh is fair so burn me like You don't care.
make alive all my fears, tonight my blood stains in tears.
tonight my soul dies; You have darkened my skies.
tonight i will worry - is this the end of O.our story?
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I wrote You into my stars so that I could forever gaze upon You. You abide between the grand dipper and the mighty Orion; above the northern star and just below the grace of the swan. my heart beats for Your clarity in this time of dark confusion. You do not shine tonight though because i've lost You. i've lost You. i've lost how to gaze up. i've lost my way. But i know You still abide up there, so please don't give up on me; please don't loose me. I know that You've wrote me among Your servants - please don't stop looking down. |
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Today my fortune cookie said "you will be surprised by something titillating and frightening but you will accept it." |
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The past two years i have been experiencing a depression, which comes and goes, and which has become devastating to me. There is no reason at all for my depression. my life is good. i am not sure what triggers it. Lately when it hits me i have thoughts that i no longer want to be alive. This is not like me at all.
i was thinking the other night how i have searched for a bad boy all of my life; one who can mess me up and rip me apart. But now, i have been needing a hero. |
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Didn't realize so many people paid attention to my journal! So, new question that i have been pondering... what is more important; obedience or submission? ~dirtydarling |
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What is the point in Owning a masochist if You are a Sadist? Doesn't that kind of defeat the purpose? i mean...how can You enjoy hurting someone if who You are hurting enjoys being hurt? Feel free to send me Y.your comments. ~dirtydarling |
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"In reality, Love is Grand. Love is Pure. And Love will forge people through fire. There is nothing wrong with a Dominant loving His/Her submissive. A bond between T.those who Love each O.other can be just as strong as any! And i have nothing against those who have built their D/s relationships upon Love. But for U.us, Love is only a weak emotion that belongs with the slaves. Love implies dependency, sacrifice, and unselfishness - all of which weakens the Power, Authority, and Supremacy of a Master/Mistress AND gives the slave leverage. A slave should never possess any leverage. As a slave i understand the need to be loved, yes! Although i accept that He does not love me, and i will never assume or estimate that He does, i still desire love from Him. Because i am fragile; He breaks me, messes me up, makes me fall,... it is only an animalistic nature to reach out and grab any leverage that i can! But the greatest gift Master has given to me is not leverage, but is instead a solid foundation upon which to bust my ass on. ;) i fervently love Him, but He does not love me in return. This is righteous for a slave's soul." - dirtydarling |
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"i used to believe that my submission would save me from Him. But now i know the truth. Even as i submitted His favor turned against me. The only thing that saves me from Him is the value He sees in me. And because His value comes by His grace alone, i am now ever more the pathetic slave deeper in love with Him." - dirtydarling |
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i don't want Someone who knows how to be a Gentleman.
What i want is a Gentleman who knows how to stop being a Gentleman. |
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"A submissive chooses how and who she serves; a slave simply chooses who." ~ BurlyDom |
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"Even if the opportunity did arise, a slave is not a true slave in her heart if she considers making accusations of kidnapping or rape. You asked for it, now deal with it. And likewise, a Master is not a true Master if he is fearful of such accusations." ~ dirtydarling |
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"Having met your Master you should feel as far from being perfect as you ever have. This is righteous for a slave's soul." ~ dirtydarling |
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"Take me as Your lowest so that i may strive to be Your highest." ~ dirtydarling |
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"The hand of Dominance is not to bestow happiness, but to give a submissive the grace to work out happiness for herself." - dirtydarling |
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"Be a lamp in His dungeon if you cannot be a star in His sky." ~ dirtydarling (revised) |
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i drew a circle that shut Him out,
but He and Trust had the wit to win;
He drew a larger circle that took me in.
~ dirtydarling
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"If You seek to Own then be difficult to please; not because Your standards are high, but because You refuse to settle for less. And if you seek to BE Owned then be difficult to submit; not because You are a fake, but because your surrender runs deep." - dirtydarling |
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"It is in loving [your Master], not in being loved [by your Master], the heart is blessed; It is in giving [to your Master], not in seeking gifts [from your Master], we find our quest; Whatever be your longing or your need, that give [to your Master]; So shall your soul be fed, and you indeed shall live." - unknown |
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If you are the lowest slave in God's kingdom, what does that make you to those outside God's kingdom? ~ dirtydarling |
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Another day, another breath,
Another chance to pray for death.
Give myself and give it all,
Open deep and embrace a fall.
Surrender now like never before,
This is how on wings i soar.
Let the Serpent take His bite -
Set on course this phoenix's flight.
~ dirtydarling
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He has found me, lost
in despair and detachment,
bitterness and hopelessness.
This is why; in the frost
of the moment, He has tossed
my weaknesses at no cost:
He is my God. Where
He has taken weaknesses
and has done like no other -
never telling me He won't
suffer the faults of another's hand.
He has exploited, rather,
these weaknesses and used
them to bind this bruised
slave closer to Him. Abused
and infused with His brand;
He is my God, because
He transcends the faults
of all others and uses them
to bring about His right of hand.
This is why He is my God.
~ dirtydarling
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God said, "you are forever Mine. But if you stray from the path I've set before you than I will abandon you."
slave asked, "But God, how can You abandon me if i am forever Yours?"
God said, "when you've submitted to My right to abandon you, than I shall forever be yours."
- dirtydarling |
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"If you want to know where your heart lies, look to where your mind wanders." -unknown |
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Say goodbye,
As W/we lie with our demons tonight.
Don't you never give in,
In the end,
Don't You never hold back.
Left to stand one more time.
Left to withstand lies in Your eyes.
Say goodnight, tonight
I believed in You.
Open my wounds one more time,
Watch me bleed in despair.
- You said You'd be there -
Say goodbye,
Time to say goodnight.
Tonight W/we shall lie
with O/our demons so bright.
~dirtydarling
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I confess:
You may be found respecting no
bounds and you may forcedly
surround my flailing sounds but
that is where you'll find me too,
bowed and bound, drunk like a
clowned up slut with that
dumbfound grin. I'll be crowned by
your pounding then ordered to
the background by the rounding of
your foreground. I crave the holy
compound of your essence,
earthbound God. Astound me, and
then treat me like your fairground.
~ dirtydarling
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One Master is worth an eternity of men.
~ dirtydarling |
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Bad advice for a slave;
"Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option." |
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Slipping away. I pray
do not allow this Bliss
unless by nearby you
remain as mine. Divine
Love, above reasons, rein
me like you thirst; first
my seasons, than standby
and break treasons. Take
this ravine between destiny
and Bliss away. Miss not,
Less my heart may tear apart.
If this you choose to refuse
I shall pray away anyway;
Do not allow this Bliss
unless by nearby you
remain as mine, Valentine.
~dirtydarling
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Time brings the weather
my soul will forge through;
tether to the wind,
curfew by the sun.
Time brings the weather
my soul will endure;
discipline by the storm,
undone by the calm.
Yet now - my God
my soul will look to you.
Time to be transformed.
Time for me to realize
lying there in your eyes
is where I can forever
predict the weather.
~dirtydarling
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Allow me these knees, please.
May you grace my prayer.
In my highest and purest devotion
are still found sins against you.
I pray,
stray not from perfecting me.
I ask,
unmask my soul through fire
where I may be found as creation,
please.
Where here on these knees
the discovery of a foundation -
You as my God.
May you become my world,
both today and tomorrow,
that I may find unfurled
strength to carry on.
Today and tomorrow
I pray,
stray not from forgiveness.
I ask,
task me with faith.
And here on these knees, please
May you find me in adoration.
For a slave such as myself
will never be worth
a God such as yourself.
~dirtydarling |
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Sadistic Master,
i never thought to find
sanity in Your chaos.
~ dirtydarling
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Longing Like lovers
listless in their cells
of loneliness; Your
laurels will never
grace my likelihood.
Learning to live like
this calls my soul into
luxury – so fake;
So shallow and lean
that even lifeless
laurels would lull how
ludicrous i am.
Allow me this leap.
i will believe in
Your deliverance;
Your liberation,
Simply because we
are legitimate
lovers longing for
the likeness of each
other. Surely dreams
do come true. Surely.
~dirtydarling
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Like a drum
Hum over these wounds
‘you are mine,
dine in this moment.’
Like a flow
Bestow strength in pearls
over this path on knees.
Tease this soul
Like a devil,
Dishevel these towers
Whisper ‘I am God
Abroad your horizon.’
Like a saint
Acquaint these eyes with
Your ways that i might
Ignite the darkness.
~dirtydarling |
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Your power
Know just the right touch
And exactly where to place it.
Like haunting
A commotion within
My vessel, squirming to feel.
Your power
Delve into this soul with
Driving force of destruction.
Like aflame
A smoldering need
My vessel, regenerates.
Your power
Take over with authority
Leaving acquiesce in wake.
Like desire
A design everlasting
My vessel, bend to obey.
Your power
Hold onto my life with
A jealous possession.
Like awe
A being now with purpose
My vessel, becomes possessed.
Your power
Above all strength now calls
my vessel into life worth living.
~ dirtydarling |
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I Am: underneath Your eyes,
my identity meshed into Your mold;
i am the freed flower that cries,
Because You break and You hold
The frailty of my body, foretold
How surrender can become so bold.
I Am: a queen of all deep love,
You my God of unconquerable pain;
Know that my soul quivers above
Clouds of abandon, and never restrain
Your darkest depths from my yielding heart
For our dance was never meant to part.
I Am: lover of this vein Deity;
gifting purpose and a colorful life,
i, an object of groveling depravity
suffering beneath His muse; cane or knife,
i am ever thankful for this secure place;
His feet, His eyes. Forever embrace.
~ dirtydarling |
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