Since updating profiles takes so long, I will do journals instead. I could have died last week.  I spent 5 days in the hospital and the doctors told me if I hadn't gone in as quickly as I did, it would have been a lot worse.  Maybe too late.  It gave me a lot of time to think and a lot to think about.  It really brought home that I am 66 years old, and people my age die all the time and that life expectancy for men in the USA is only 72.  Of course there are a lot of factors that go into that and that is an average of all male babies born, and when I factored in all my personal info it came out to 95 years.  And I take good care of myself and eat mostly the right foods and watch my weight.  Still, this last week made me truly think about my own mortality and that for all that I don't think of myself as old, shit happens.  And the older you get, the more likely it is to happen. So I thought a lot about what I truly wanted to do with the rest of my life.  I have already achieved a lot of my goals.  Nice house.  White picket fence, well it's red brick wall, but still counts.  My kids are grown and independent.  I have friends, hobbies, plenty to keep me busy.  My retirement is funded and I can live comfortable for well past those 95 years.  The real question is what do I want to do with those years.  And being a slave isn't it.  Well it is, but not all of it.  I want to live those years.  Travel, go to events, experience.  And I don't want to do it alone. I want to do it with you.  I just don't know who you are yet.  I know you are wickedly smart, have an engaging sense of humor and value integrity as much as I do.  Trust has to be 100 percent in both directions.  99.99 percent isn't good enough.  And you have to be a total perv.  I mean make the average perv blush.  And yes, of course with informed, consenting adults only.  I'm perverted, not evil. You should enjoy geekery.  An old girlfriend used to call me the elder geek.  I was a geek before it became pop culture.  You should have ambition.  I am not a sugar daddy.  Though if you are still on your way up, continuing your education or just starting your career or business, I can shoulder the load until you can hold your own. I acomplished more before my 27th birthday than most people do in a lifetime.  I deserve the best.  At least the best for me, and I won't settle for less.  And I seek a woman who also seeks the best for herself and won't settle for less.  Remember the first Rocky movie?  Rockie talking to Paulie about himself and Adrian? “She's got gaps, I've got gaps, together we fill gaps.” Let's fill each other's gaps.  No match is perfect. Every relationship requires work for all involved.  Both to build and to maintain.  I'm willing to put in the time and energy if you are.  

As an experienced Dominant in the leather community, I can certainly understand the appeal of consensual objectification within a safe, sane space. When I discover that my submissive derives pleasure from being treated as an object of desire, it elicits a complex range of emotions.   There is a sense of power and control, knowing I can shape their experience and push the boundaries of their submission. But there is also a deep well of trust and responsibility that comes with that. I must handle their vulnerability with the utmost care, ensuring their needs are met even as I strip away their agency.   It's a delicate dance, really.    On one hand, there’s the thrill of reducing them to a mere plaything for my enjoyment.    On the other hand, there’s the profound connection of being entrusted with their most intimate desires. It's a privilege to be granted that level of trust and intimacy. And with that privilege comes the duty to wield it wisely, to push just to the edge without ever compromising their safety or well-being.   Does that resonate with you? The heady mix of control and care, power and responsibility? Please speak to me, and let us explore this dynamic further in the confines of our sacred space.

:'( :"""( :"( :""(  wish i had someone to be here care ease my pain a little comfort hold me something. so hurting down used cheated on lied to hurt never good enough so much bad in life and hurt

As M and I take our search for a bull more serious I would like to give you a little background on me. The following is my very abbreviated true life story and an explanation of how M and I ended up here.    As a young girl, I was always fascinated with sex and the power of what I knew was different from what others were into. I grew up in the middle of New Hampshire on a small farm and knew nothing of pop culture. My mom cut my hair, and her own willow switches. Both felt like their own brand of punishment. I was often bullied in school. Always by the boys. The girls tended to ignore me as I was bookish and weird. I will never forget the very first time when, backed into a corner, I finally kicked my aggressor in the balls. I felt a rush of power. Instantly I went from simply wishing they would leave me alone to read my book in peace, to looking forward with anticipation to the daily assault I would give them. Looking back now, I realize that some of them enjoyed the power exchange. By high school, I was a sexual demon. I didn’t know there were names for the roles I enjoyed. I just knew that sex was power, and I needed to feel that rush as often as possible. During my last year in college, I finally found a name for those roles. I started working at a fetish and fantasy house in Manhattan in 1998. I started there as a switch, and enjoyed it as a learning experience, but I quickly found myself drawn to playing the role of the Dominant Sadistic Goddess. Always with a wicked sense of humor. This was a great place to explore my kinky sexuality and fostered a lifelong love of the kink and BDSM community. But soon enough – I outgrew that space. I moved to San Francisco and spent the next 8 years as an independent professional Dominatrix. It was the way for me to explore myself and the world. I traveled all over the world to visit devotees. I put myself through law school, which became my “real career”. Turns out, I could not stay away and returned to my love of being a professional Dominatrix and BDSM educator in my limited free time.  In 2012, while visiting the East Coast, at a scene night in a Manhattan club, I saw a young man standing alone in rather vanilla clothing. He looked so helpless; it was clearly his first event. I saw not only a potential client, but someone I knew needed help. This young man turned out to be M who would later become my husband. We spent years building a relationship through sessions and dates that would follow. It was a slow process but we started involving each other more and more in our separate lives. Eventually my work outside BDSM brought me back to the East Coast. My relationship with M blossomed even more at that point, he was no longer a client. We were getting very close and were no longer exploring his interests, we were exploring mine. I decide to stop seeing clients and we moved close to each other. I turned my free time attentions to coaching women in BDSM and kink. After so many years of catering to the fantasies of men, I was captivated by women’s sexual journeys and helping them name and realize their own deepest desires. My experiences learning from other women confirmed what I had always suspected – that toxic masculinity is bad for EVERYONE’S sex life and I bring that ethos to my marriage and my life. M and I were married in a private ceremony in SF in 2016. I have stopped teaching in my free time and have focused all my kink energy in creating the exact lifestyle marriage I have always dreamed of.  Potential bulls, f you have questions and would like me to elaborate please don't hesitate to ask.  K

So a lot has changed really, a profile update will be written soon. The biggest change really, in myself, is the stretching (quite literally i guess, pun not intended) Previously the only hole penetrated by a Dominant was my mouth (mostly with fingers but the odd strap on/vibe/dildo/phallus), but i am currently being trained anally and urethrally (is that even a word). i have never enjoyed the experience of even the smallest digit oenetrating me anally and would scream the place down through a gag if anything bigger than a pinkie finger up there. As i write this i have had a 4" butt plug in now for around 18 of the past 24 hours. Do i enjoy it? Not really. I have got to the stage where i can, for decent lengths of time, forget about it as it feels normal but only really when not moving about. i can also insert it myself when ordered to do so, not a feat i would previously have thought possible.   The story of how this, once hard limit, along with urethral sounds, were accidentally, on the same day no less, is one for another day but i thought, after many years on CM and now CS, i would make use of my journal to record my anal training journey so others may learn what they might expect. 

Phew and thank god!   I nearly forked out just under £500 on the wrong specimen: 1. £295 for harness gear - custom made still lush 2. £50 for the application in 2 sizes 3. £95 rope bondage lesson but getting discount as the teacher is an old friend of mine   Will still spend for myself but if I ask a man questions it means I am investing time to understand how to give you what you want. You can't give me a second, ok, harness yourself.   I am good.   Still investing in the supplies just finding a worthy destination. Some people like to talk forever and not act on their impulse I was thinking lets act on the impulse not just talk about it.

I want a truly submissive, Female Supremacist who is acquiescent to their core and craves pampering a Beautiful and Dominant Goddess. I am bored of being approached by porn sick sex focused faux-subs who want to use Women to fulfill their kinks and "domestic shlubs". Cleaning My toilet is not an act of submission. Worshipping any sexual parts of my body is not an act of submission. Understanding your role as a male and sub in the order of My World is an act of submission. Begging to know how you can be of use, cater to Me and relieve Me of stress or woes is an act of submisoon. I am a dream Woman by all standards. I expect any sub who even attempts to approach Me to have a "how can i tangibly make Your day better, Goddess" attitude. Enough with the sex and domestic crazed bs. It's lazy, patronizing and patriarchal. The only sub I'll accept is one who hired a cleaning service to work while I'm enjoying a spa day that they arranged for Me. Afterward, they will prepare a delicious meal for Me, then I let out My pent up stress on them in a corporal manner, or have My feet massaged and kisssed...whatever mood stirs Me.

Be who you are—fully, unapologetically, without hesitation. Not the version shaped by expectation. Not the version softened to be accepted. But the one that exists underneath all of that—clear, aligned, and undeniable. Let what no longer fits you… fall away. All the expectations that were never yours.All the identities you outgrew.All the roles you kept playing out of habit, not truth. Release them. Allow everything that isn’t aligned with you to dissipate naturally—without force, without resistance. What’s meant for you doesn’t need to be held together artificially. Free yourself from what no longer exists. And then… build again. With intention. With clarity. With honesty about who you are and what you need. If matriarchy is your path—walk it with confidence.If servitude is your language—speak it without shame.If structure, devotion, power, or surrender call to you—answer fully. There is nothing wrong with becoming who you were meant to be. The only mistake is refusing to. — Mistress Nikki Vixen

Cowards?  Dolts?  Flakes?  Predators?  Time wasters?  Inconsistent at best. Its weird to have people request a time for speaking, give you their phone number and then close their account before the appointed time.  Such odd behavior and it certainly gives one pause when engaging here.  Then there are those whom you have spoken with many times, shared video chat, Q & A, moving towards a meeting, only to - never contact you again once you request a meeting. You are not sincere and genuine. Where have all the cowboys gone - the one with social graces, honor, integrity?  There are a few here of course and they are greatly appreciated but the rest ...need relationship therapy. Thank GOD there are a few men here who are moving in the right direction!  I fear I would lose all hope if not for their persistence and welcome demeanors.

Some of us are born to serve.  I sought out alpha males online as a horny porn obsessed boy. One of those Daddy's began to use me and fill me after weeks of convincing and guidance as I ackwowledged i wanted to get fucked not fuck and that I like the idea of having my pussy filled. Daddy Mark suggested household suppiies to penetrate my hole.  I began to jerk off with my clit over my mouth. I came into my mouth. I ate my cum. Daddy Mark wanted to meet. After limited resistance Daddy Mark drove to my neighborhood late at night where I snuck out and met him in a quiet area a few blocks from my home. He directed me to wear only a tshirt and shorts and to approach his van. When he opened the door he told me to get in and remove my clothes and hand them to him. I did as told.  He filled both my holes. He fed me poppers as he showed me porn of twinks being bred.  I left knowing that I'd never do that again.  Two weeks later I did that again. This time in my youth baseball uniform. He filled me with my jock strap on.  "You're made to be a bottom bitch," Daddy Mark said. "You're the most eager bottom I've ever had." Meeting 3 saw me sink deeper. I told my parents I'd be spending a weekend at a friends house but instead rode with Daddy Mark to his house, where a sex swing, basement playroom and two Daddys waited to make me their bitch.  I've slowly accepted I want to be a slave. Owned, taken, shaped, used. I'm a sissy. Open to relcation, few limits, TPE and life free to be a slave.  

Reflection: Week 1 Well I would say that the first week has gone pretty well. I have worn my collar daily. I have used a plug all but one day. I will find some additional attire for around the house that will be acceptable. I have shared all of the messages with him that I have received since the beginning of the new year. It may be a small step but I feel like these things help maintain a good headspace for us bith and encourages intimacy on various levels. I will try to keep an ongoung update as time permits. Through reflection comes the opportunity for growth.

Collaring It's come to my attention that a lot of Dom's don't have any formal collaring ceremony and tend to awkwardly wing it. There's nothing wrong with that, we all started somewhere. I'm writing this for those Dom's who need a "Step 1" since you can't exactly go to chatgpt and ask for this. This comes after vetting, after ensuring compatibility and establishing limits. Couple things to know about my dynamic before we go further. First, every girl has their "enterance name". Something simple like little one or pretty girl, generic. Then this is when they get both their collar and their slave name. In this case the girl is going from "pretty girl" to "princess". I begin: The room is dim, but there are a few candles lit, casting a glow. The applicant (as I call the new girls) kneels next to Puppy, jewel of my harem, which is a mix between a den mother and a mother superior. I slowly settle into my chair across the room from those two and look directly at the new girl who instinctively lowers her eyes, but lets out the slightest hint of a smile. "Lower your forehead to the floor, and begin crawling towards me," I tell her before she slowly obeys. I begin to recite as she crawls towards me and away from puppy: "For as long as man has walked beside animals he has used collars for a simple reason: To mark his possessions. To control them via means of a leash or just holding the collar. To show that they belong to someone. A collar tells others that this one is not stray, or unclaimed. A collar says something. Pride. Identity. Belonging. But above all that? It shows you are owned." I then reach down, and wrap the collar around her throat. she still hasn't looked up, her forehead still pressed to the floor. I gently lift her chin and smile, and look into her eyes. "Hello, pretty girl. My name is Master, and yours is Princess" Usually there's a soft "hi" and a smile. What you do after this is completely up to you, but I usually turn my personality all the way back on and say something akin to "OK get your ass over here" and wrap her up in a bear hug. Couple notes: I paced myself, matching my cadence to her speed and being careful to finish as she approached. If need be take a moment to tell her to slow down or speed up. Do so with swiftness and command. Something like "I'm sure your more eager to receive your collar than that. you can move a little faster." or "This isnt a race, you will slow down, breathe." I maintain a strict "sir" only name until this point. I am a random dom, therefore I am sir. Its only after she's collared that its official and she can call me Master, Daddy, or whatever was decided upon. The name she was gonna call me was established long ago. I've got a whole post called "Whats in a name?". Take this, modify it to your own needs, critique it, and enjoy.

I’m at a point in life where I’m genuinely ready for love and a long-term relationship built on emotional depth, chemistry, and mutual investment. I’m drawn to men who are grounded, emotionally aware, communicative, and naturally attentive to the person they care about. I give deeply when I choose someone (like the Leo I am). And I’m drawn to people who naturally feel inspired to meet that energy, or even exceed it. I notice when someone shows up with care and initiative. I’m not looking for potential or vague curiosity. I’m looking for someone who actively wants to build something real, evolve together, and hopefully explore power-exchange through a FLR.  I created a questionnaire as a doorway into that exploration. You sharing real experiences matter more than theoretically "correct" answers. If you feel intrigued rather than intimidated you’re probably in the right place ❤️ Submit your answers here: https://forms.gle/6Ui8kVrZasXGZmc8A  /Miss Trevligheter

Apparently it's time for a much needed journal entry, because my inbox is flooded with messages. A lot of nice messages from nice people with whom nice contact has already arisen, but unfortunately there are also a lot of people out there with (sexual) frustrations or worse. To make things clear to everyone who seeks me out to have a chat, if you have an extensive wishlist as to how you would like to be handled, kept or be treated, I am probably not for you. Submission derives from to submit! This essentially means that you follow and submit to Me and I decide where and how I am going to submit you. Being a slave, means to give up ones free will and give up his or her freedom. Eventhough this is in the BDSM way of life and completely voluntary, it does still mean that I get to kick you out to the curbes if you don't uphold our agreement. In other words, we've made a deal. You become my slave and I get to do with you however I please and you get nothing in return. Your reward lies in being My slave. Then a footnote for some nutcase I came across who felt he needed to fill my mailbox with his pedantic little finger. Nobody is forcing you to send me a message, nobody is telling you or forcing you to become my slave (it is a privilage and certainly not one for you to receive). A footnote in general: I literally receive 30 emails an hour. I am not at your disposal, but those who are chosen by me are at my disposal! Very important difference. This means that I will not respond when and how it suits you, but if and when it suits Me! That will do for now. If you reach out, either be polite or f*** off!  To all others, it is fun getting acquainted with you and talk to y'all soon. Greetings Mrs B.

I've been on and off this site for a long time, and last time I tried, getting a profile write-up changed - was impossible.  Rather than go through that process, I'm writing a Journal Entry.  I've attempted a couple of relationships the past five years and I have to say that I'm exhausted by emotionally unavailable Doms who only want to play on the internet.  If that's all you want, I'm not interested.   Yes, I can relocate.  That part of my life has changed.No, I'm not going to redo my entire profile write-up.  If you want to know about me, ask.  I need someone in my life who is a good communicator and this is a great place to let me know you are willing to fill that need. As of 2026-03-13 I am 65 years old.  I'm in pretty good shape for my age and I have some arthritis issues that can be worked around.That's what I have for today.  Who are you? J  

This success of this site is based on transparency. You're a 52 year old dominant man in Miami who lives for NASCAR and wax play. Super. Got it. In my opinion, the level of effort you put into your profile directly relates to your commitments. It's so odd to see someone say that it takes forever for profiles to update so they take the lazy approach and update a journal entry. Yep, I said it. Lazy. Dom or sub, doesn't matter. You've gone to the trouble of creating a profile to find someone for whatever reason. Now you aren't willing to commit to the effort it takes to update for accuracy. The only effort needed is a bit of patience. Patience to adjust your information. Patience to adapt your description to make you more interesting, or at least approachable. I'll write more later... No, you won't. Someone who might be looking for exactly you is going to pass you by because now you're 56 and moved to Sheboygan but won't update so they'll never see it. You're shooting yourself in the foot. Not that anyone asked me. 

him on 8/17/25 at 10:54 AM: Would you talk to older, retired submissive, man?   him  on 10/10/25 at 2:03 PM: I would love to be captured by you, trained as a slave, and sold into the slave market to a forceful dominant couple   Me on 10/10/25 at 2:07 PM: Thats nice. Id love to have applicants for my submission that were actually writing ME, the human, based on their reading my profile and writings and figuring out our potential c ompatibilities rather than randos who copy and paste messages to every pretty picture.   him on 10/10/25 at 2:09 PM: Im sorry maam, but that was direct nothing was copy and pasted. It was just one of my many fantasies to give up control, but that was an actual message not copy and paste.   him on 10/11/25 at 9:01 AM: You are very pretty and very powerful   him on 10/11/25 at 2:39 PM: God, you are beautiful   Me on 10/11/25 at 2:40 PM: Do I strike you as someone who is susceptible to flattery?   him on 10/11/25 at 2:44 PM: I only know that you are very attractive to submissive men   him on 10/11/25 at 2:51 PM: I sincerely apologize if I insulted you him on 2/6/26 at 10:43 AM: Would you be interested in dominating a older, white submissive, male wishing to be trained anyway, that you wish and to be your servant to be used abused, and even loaned out if that’s what you wish   Me on 2/6/26 at 1:28 PM: Here's the problem. You are so focused on what you want, that you have yet to bother to consider what *I* want. You have now written me EIGHT times, yet literally failed to the one one single thing I asked in the first fucking line of my fucking profile, even after I EXPLICITLY stated that's something I require. You know - the thing that tells you who I am, beyond just the "pretty" and "beautiful" picture you seem to obsessed with. You want to be "trained" and "dominated" but you have already shown yourself to be lazy, self-absorbed, and utterly unsuitable for anything I might want to use you for.  

tonight i miss you   19 years and counting. i still don't know your name. i still don't know your face. but you have to be out there.   i miss you every day. but nights like tonight are harder.   things are rough right now....big jess is worn and little jess is despondent. just for tonight if only i could see you, if only i could hear you, smell you feel you.   maybe if you could hold me and tell me somehow this will all work out i could keep going better. but i can't.   tonight i hit another wall another moment where the adult me has to push and the little me hides more and more, it's not safe to be out.   daddy i don't know why you've been gone for so long but i really wish you could hold me right now and talk to me and just for one night we could go to sleep together. even if it was just a moment and the stars and spirit took you away from me again...just one moment would fill my juice cup so big.   someone told me it sounds like a good country song, "19 years of looking and he's still not here". every day i feel your absence. but tonight is one of those impossible nights.   tonight i miss you.

To all who intend deceit and to take advantage of others, and whose joy is in playing games that cost others , please stop. A cut and paste message that says nothing personal about me or why you wrote to ME specifically suggests you are another of the many deceitful people who do not seek relationship, connection nor reality. your ignorant message says a lot about your parents failure in how they raised you and confirms what others who know you in person already think, you are as much of a failure as your parents. Some people should not be allowed to breed as they produce lower life forms that lack souls, morals and positive intentions. A rattle snake lives its nature people like you choose to be deceitful and poisonous      

Sexual ownership and use is a crucial part of what I look for and what I need. I know some look down on that, but I have my reasons. I am searching and seeking and hoping to find something I had a long time ago, a complete sense of ownership and sexual use with no say in how or when or why I was used. It was very, very sexual and I was completely at the whim of a stronger person who could take or do anything to me at any time. They did not take certain liberties, but they could have and they made sure I was very well aware of their power over me. Because that experience was the very thing that unlocked the door of servitude for me, sexuality and sex is a very crucial part  of what I need. I am not talking about my own gratification. If someone so chose, they could provide that, but that would totally be up to them. I am talking about their use of me...however THEY choose...to make THEM happy. When they are done, they can put me back in the closet, in a cage or where ever they choose. Female or male, black, white, hispanic, oriental...matters not to me as much as the opportunity to be used as an outlet for their sexual frustrations, pleasure, whatever they choose. Ask me about the experience and I will tell all about it. When I am contacted by a straight male dom, I'm never quite sure if I'm what they're looking for and often I am not. More often than not they're looking for "worker slaves" and while I am open to that and no stranger to working hard, it would not fulfill me as a slave to simply have that ect explored. Sound odd? It probably does....but my early, early experience left its mark on me forever.

It was way too soon to be sodomized the first time someone tried.  I just couldn't take it.  It hurt so much that I avoided anal sex until I was in my early 50s.  Realizing how many years I wasted being afraid turned me into the eager slut I am now.  It's true.  I can't speak for anyone else but I have heard this happens to a lot of betas.  Anymore when anyone fucks me I lose all sense of manhood and experience a surge of femininity until they finish, sometimes even longer now.  It feels so right but it doesn't last like I want it to.  I'm sure the day is coming when I'll remain a gurl permanently. There are Doms and Dommes here who want submissives like me to feminize and control.  I might be the ideal one to serve you long term and live-in. So, please tell me, how can I serve you?  How do you see me fitting into your household and improving your life?  

So its 2022 and I have been here a long while. Still no one claiming to be Dominant and willing to prove it has come my way in this time, will this be the year it happens, probably not. I think most people have given up on this site delivering them a submissive or slave that can fulfill their needs, as much as they fulfill theirs Of course my needs are simple, I would like a Dominant man or couple, who want a relationship which can migrate from a one night stand, to many nights together, and days. But will it happen, I doubt it I am fed up of having to be the assertive one, I am supposed to be asserted upon, Doms on here too afraid to approach someone because others have been such a let down, well, that concept is also felt by many subs and slaves who arrange to play with Dominants who aren't real. So be assertive, sweep me off my feet, treat me with some respect, remember your goal is to want me to spend my time serving you, so if you come at me like a total moron, I'll treat you like one.

The vow of a slave:   I met her in the shadow’s call, A Mistress strong, unyielding, tall. Bound by fate, though not by choice, A forced path, a silenced voice.   At first, I raged, defied, denied, Met steel with fire, stood in pride. Yet every lash, each measured word, Cut through walls I'd never heard.   Then one night, through softened eyes, I saw her break, I heard her cries. Not steel nor whip, but fragile pain, A soul beneath the cold domain.   I made her laugh, I found the key, A bond unshackled—yet bound was me. Not by chains nor cruel demand, But by the touch of knowing hands.   She spoke of honor, of my name, That my defeat would bring her shame. A slave to her, but not to fear, She made my purpose crystal clear.   No loss allowed, no second place, For I was hers—a pure embrace. With every strike, with every fight, I bore her will, I claimed my right.   And so I swore, through time unkind, She holds my heart, she owns my mind. Not just in flesh, but in my soul, For she had shaped me, made me whole.

"First Encounter" Inner thoughts of this dom. HIM:  "Today I'm about to meet this incredibly sexy submissive ive been coveting for a while. She a cute little thing that would be perfect to join my family. I wonder how quick she will succumb to my will? What and how far will she go to be allowed to orgasm?" These as many other stray and random thought rattled their way around my mind. The excitement mounting as we were about to meet real time after a very long period of online and phone chats as we each revealed ourselves to each other. Developing what we hoped would be a meet that would cause sparks to fly within us as the anticipation had grown that seductive. I meet you at a quiet little bar. There we introduce ourselves for the first time in real life. I feel like I know so much about you after the many weeks we have spent chatting online. You are even more beautiful in person. As I hug you tightly to my body the faint whiff of your perfume entices me. I slowly slide my hands down your back as out tongues dance in our joined mouths. Working down your firm ass I can't help but squeeze your cheeks. I slight moan escapes your lips into my mouth. I disengage our lips and bring my face against your neck. Once again inhaling your perfume and freshly washed hair. As I bring one hand up to your head to hold it in place as I nuzzle your neck my other hand slides up your short dress to make sure you followed my instructions and didn't wear underwear.  I pull your head to the side by your hair exposing your neck. Like Dracula I attack your neck. Nibbling and licking it as I work my way to your naked shoulder. My other hand openly caressing your naked ass for all to see. I am so proud of her. She passingly mentioned to me that she was never into PDA nor was she much for kissing. Yet here we stood locked together mouth to mouth for all the world to see. "If only she had gotten thus kind of affection more often. Would she feel differently?" I think to myself.  She feels the cool breeze against her naked ass as I intentionally expose it. I want to see her reaction to my actions. Will she deny my? If I am to be her sir surely she will comply. She knows if she passes the tasks I will bestow upon her over the next week that she will find shelter within my arms. Secure in the fact that I will help her grow and be there to catch her when she falls. For this she will give me her mind, heart and body but eventually I want to own her soul. The pilgrimage of that honor is my quest.   HER: Feeling you lift my incredibly already short skirt and the breeze on my ass, you feel my whole body grow warm, and see the bright red spreading across my skin, as i move my hand to cover my poor ass and gs every so quietly, in your grip i do my best to turn away from the other people near by knowing i wont get far i still wiggle and whisper a quiet "Sir, theres people looking" all the whole attempting to pull the skirt back down and cover myself.  As she tries to pull back her skirt feeling humiliated and embarrassed I quietly whisper in her ear. It ok baby girl. You are beautiful scars and all. I desire to show you off. Love yourself for me.  You feel my fingers sliding between the cheeks of your ass. Relieved that this action is allowing your skirt to begin covering your nakedness. Suddenly you feel my finger tip dip between your lips that are moist from fear and excitement. The action is quick and efficient. Only lasting a split second yet the feelings it created within you may last much longer. You quickly look around to see if anyone noticed your reaction and what sir is doing to you. There at the bar is a young man. He can't be any older than 22. A grin on his face as he quickly turns away when you look his way as if you wouldn't notice the lust within his eyes. You suddenly feel wanted and desired.  Here your sir wants you and is giving you the attention you've been longing for for so long. And a man who is so young looks at you like a cougar with lust. Willing to pounce on you if he could. All these thoughts are running freely thru your tangled mind. Mixed emotions running ramped like a freed feral cat. Yet your body is betraying you with its actions. You turn suddenly away from me pulling me towards the waiting booth in the darker corner. I see the flushed look in your face. The embarrassment I have caused you. It turns me on making my cock twitch even more. The wetness I felt when dipping my finger in you showed me how your body betrays your mind. Although embarrassed you are turned on. Is it because of my actions or because you were being watched. I glance at the young man who is once again looking. I look him in the eye with alpha male intimidation that has served me well all my life. Something earned taught and released from my primal interior being from the years I spent in special forces while in the military. Something about one who has seen things that show the ugliness of man is like an imprint. Although not visible it is detected in posture. My eyes show a certain sadness but also scream that I am not one to be reckoned with. The young man immediately turns away. He picks up his beer and goes to the other end of the bar. Interpreting the unsaid message given to him by just a glare by a man more than twice his age. That instant momentarily distracts me as I faintly hear something you said but didn't fully acknowledge.  I pull you back to me. Holding you tight against my body once again. I feel your breasts pressed against my chest. Our groins mashed together as if they already know what is to come later. Anxious to get started as my cock strains against the denim of my jeans held prisoner. I whisper once again into your ear. "It's OK baby girl. I want to feel you against me for another moment.  After all these weeks you are now flesh and not just words. I nip your bare shoulder lightly with my teeth.  My tongue then flicks back and forth where my teeth once bit as if to offer a healing moment.  Unneeded tho because of the gentleness of it. Putting the smile on my face that I use for the world, the one that doesn't necessarily reach my eyes but seems to somehow charm everyone that comes in contact with.  Feeling you slide into the booth next to me, I have to concentrate so hard. In a way that I do not tense up, but keep my body relaxed. In the way "he who must not be named" showed me at all times. Afterall, no man wants to cuddle a corpse Katey! Shaking the thought from my head. I relax and let my features fall soft. Warm and welcoming. I risk a glance up from the table where my gaze has previously been focused and catch his eyes. They're peering into mine! Why on earth does it feel like he's looking straight into my soul? No one ever notices this much or pays this much attention. I know I'm cute tonight. Hell, I'm always cute. Enough cleavage showing to capture the attention of everyone in the room that has a penis and even some who don't. Why is he so focused on my eyes?  Shifting nervously but trying so hard to stay relaxed. (No one cuddles a corpse Katey!) I can't help but freeze just a bit as he grabs my hand pulling it to his face. Please don't notice the sweaty palms I chant in my head. He's going to think I'm insane or unable to show love. SHIT! What if he thinks I don't like him?  Pushing the thoughts from my head again drawing my focus back to the moment. I realize he's speaking to me. Not hearing half the words, but his eyes capturing mine again like he seems to have a talent of doing. I see a soft side in there. Someone honestly gentle.  You've seen that before too Katey! Right before the black eye my brat pipes up. Shut up it's different this time try to have faith. I zone back into his words and catch something about being his pet for the night.  About being taught new things. This stirs the curious one, the fun filled one with the will to live inside me. She gets super excited bouncing up and down like a child seeing stars for the first time. Eyes shining bright. She loves to learn new things.  All this flashes across my face before the brat hog ties her and sits her back down in the chair. For once her and I agree. Now is not the time for you to surface we're still treading new waters here. Wondering if he saw the roller coaster of emotions going through my twisted broken mind before my face settles. Back to the factory style smile and shining blue eyes all the men seem to love. I relax into his touch trying to show I'm not a mutant. Afraid I'll come off robotic. The motions coming so natural they seem programmed ( No one cuddles a corpse Katey!)  Hoping this gets past him and smile briefly hearing him say, "Tonight I own you". I reply with a sweet, "Yes Sir! I can't wait." Looking into her eyes as he holds her hand for reassurance he sees inner conflict. A turbulent turmoil of emotions taking flight within. He understands these feelings all too well. Demons that he himself has wrestled with for most of his life. His innocence stripped away from him as a delusional teenager.  His mind flashes back to the day he graduated high school. Signing his life away for the next 4yrs. Gonna be a GI! Government Issued, warrior. Right the wrongs and save the world from evil.  Yeah if only he knew who the enemy really was. How evil is everywhere in so many shapes and forms. A delusioned man child at only 18 who thought he knew it all. Quickly his mind snaps back to her. He lays her hand on his thigh and holds it there. Mere inches from his inflamed cock. Swelling that she has caused. Yes she is cute. Those beautiful braless tits on display. Just as he had instructed her to show off. Her beautiful, wanting to please, features displayed on her face. Her body, in that short dress. This too he had requested. One that could have started wars centuries ago. Her freshly washed hair with a hint of fruity smell.  My God what I want to do to that body! But no not yet! Beautiful women are a dime a dozen. That's not what I am after. I want that inner beauty I know is there hiding in fear in the darkness. Perhaps behind one too many negative experiences.  He looks at her again. Tilts his head to the side and leans in. Plants a soft kiss upon her forehead. "This is to free your mind of evil thoughts.", he tells her. Then leaving her hand on his thigh he takes hold of her head. One hand on either side and draws it to him. He kisses one eye, as her eyes instinctively closed. Perhaps out of fear. Then he kisses the other. "These are to ward off evil visions and nightmares.", he tells her. As he releases her he notices her hand is right where he left it. Is it out of fear he wonders as he glances down. Then he sees her moving her hand. Rubbing his thigh. Almost as if she is giving him a non-verbal thank you. Thanking her lucky stars she's put on her trained face. Her body falling in line with the program. This scene all well to practiced in previous encounters with other men. Her body doesn't trip her up for once. It manages to stay relaxed when he reaches for her hand placing it on his thigh.  He keeps her hand trapped under his a few moments. A feeling she's used to. The pinned down feeling. But this time something is different about it. Maybe it's the soft sweet words coming from a reassuring mouth. Instead of the normal don't move whore she was used to. Maybe its the sweet soft kisses he's laid upon her forehead or eyes. She's never felt something like this in all her years experience with men. She finds it confusing. Yet comforting. Feeling that wonder child inside stir some more before the brat slaps her in the back of the head. This is why you stay locked down. Too eager and not enough caution.  The mix of emotions inside rolling over in her mind cause an automatic reaction. The smile softens on her lips. Eyes closing just a little before she peers up at him through her lashes. His hand has moved but two things occured. One she knows never to move from a spot youve been placed unless you want the belt. Yet, a stranger feeling she's not sure she's felt before. Of not wanting to move hand this time. In fear of feeling to stiff again she lightly brushes her fingertips along his thigh. Not out of habit this time but because maybe part of her actually wanted to.  Squeezing her thighs together she notices how wet she's become. She can't understand it. Pressing them tighter in fear of leaving behind a wet spot. She can't help but think, "Where are the drinks?" His relief at feeling her hand beginning to rub his thigh is a welcome relief. Although part of him wonders. Is this just a programmed response? Is she like the many other women he has spent countless hours with chatting, exchanging photos and erotica only to vanish after the session was over.  Almost as if, they, no different than what would be considered creepy guys. They used him to flirt and arouse until they achieved their level of sexual satisfaction and then disappeared. Leading him on like a cruel joke. No he says. That's why he reminds himself, it's not about the sex.  If not to toy with him then what would a beautiful young woman see in an older man like himself. The look in her eyes as she looks at him gives him strength. He sees so much of himself in her. Scars of hurt, rejection, pain and broken promises of lost love.  Yet here I am today he says almost out loud. Daring to take each step to move forward proud and strong. To never give up and to fight whatever battle comes my way. In whatever shape or form it manifests itself. His strength comes from his confidence. A weaker man would be shy and afraid to take a chance again for fear of once again being used and rejected. Tossed aside like left over scraps. But no not me. I am a WARRIOR! I want to believe that there are still people who can love out there the way I do. It keeps my faith in humanity from being irradicated. All this swims through him as his mind processes it all with the lightning speed of a super computer. Just like his training. Compartmentalize evaluate the situation and act. It has worked for him all his life. The long pause between them like a moment of silence causes some awkwardness between them. Then he feels her rubbing his thigh harder. More confidently as if by her own attrition and not a programmed response or expectational desire. It's as if she can see him go far away and is saying, "I'm here. I want to be here and you're ok". Once again he looks into her eyes and sees something that wasn't there before. A softness. A real glitter almost as if they were smiling at him. Wanting and desiring him. His already hard cock twitches. He feels it touch against her hand from the unexpected reaction she's caused. He feels a wetness against his bare thigh as he realizes he's leaking because of her! Thoughts are interrupted as the waitress finally arrives. He orders a Sprite for himself and looks at her and asks. "What would you like beautiful?" A gentle nibble and a kiss! Her coy way of showing affection is illuminating. Her cute sense of witty humor threw him off guard but breaks a grin on his face. She has the humor in her like I do he thinks.  He turns to her and sees her sitting there hands clasped together on her lap. Legs firmly held tight as if to ward off foreign invaders and protect her real-estate.  He slowly eyes her up and down. Her breasts he notices pushed out as if she is attempting to seduce him with them. Her heavy breathing pushing them in and out each time she takes a breath.  He notices how the dress accents her features and brings out the woman in her. Good choice he thinks to himself glad that he purchased it for her and had it shipped to her. Along with the garters that hold up those incredible stockings he liked so much. As he continues down he sees the cowgirl boots as well. He noticed how well the whole outfit fit her earlier but was too enthralled with other things to notice all the details till now. Even tho they are imprinted in his mind to remember forever. Their first meet and date which if leads to what he hopes and knows she desires may be a long term relationship. He brings his eyes up and looks deep into her eyes now. He made it quite obvious that he was checking her out. He looks at her hoping that checking her out and admiring her has pleased her. Perhaps even aroused her. He leans in and plants a soft and gentle kiss on her neck again. He loves necks and shoulders. Moving to her ear as the waitress returns with their drinks He whispers. "You are sexy as fuck. Even more beautiful in person than all the pictures and videos you sent me can capture. If only you knew how much I desire you right now." The waitress places the drinks in front of them smiling as she overheard his comment. She even noticed his tongue flicker across her ear. "Would you two like anything to eat tonight?" She asks. He looks at her and grins. "On our menu" she chuckles knowing what that grin insinuated. His Katey too giggled at that. Feeling more confident in herself knowing his desire was genuine.  He laughing says. Yes please can you bring us some menus.  You obviously know what I would like as my appetizer and dessert He says to the waitress knowing she has a good sense of humor. The waitress laughs with him. I don't blame you she says. I would probably skip all of that and just have her as the main course myself..... A chuckle from in his heart surfaces itself. It's audible sound to those within earshot turn to look it is that infectious and genuine. He wraps his arm around her neck as she cuddles into him for the first time. Feeling her warmth against him he wraps his arm around her neck holding her closer to him. Enjoying how she feels. He notices and feels her hand upon his thigh. This time voluntarily and with movement of its own.  "She's a firecracker isn't she" he half asks half states to the waitress. The waitress can't help but notice in the position she is in now with her head tucked into him, his arm around her neck asnif claiming ownership that she can see right down her dress. Her beautiful breast in plain sight and her nipples hard from arousal. She sees the woman's hand move to his thigh. The action of her rubbing draws her attention to it. She notices how hard he is and how his cock is running down the inside of his thigh mere millimeters from her hand. She notices what looks to be a damp spit on his jeans. She's is mesmerized by these two as she is hypnotized by their hidden affection and the energy radiating from them. She sees her run her finger along the length of his rigid cock. Slowly methodically with purpose. This little vixen knows exactly what she is doing as she looks up at her, stares into her eyes and grins. His cock continually twitching and pulsing from her actions. His voice draws her back to reality. "Whatever she wants tonight. We are celebrating our union" he says. Then he looks down at her as she lifts her eyes to meet his. A glimmer that sparkles thru his piercing blue eyes looking deep into hers. "What would my darling pet like to eat" he softly asks her. As he waits for her reply he can't help but feel a rush running thru his body. The way she's teasing his cock on her own. She may think that he didn't notice the pixy like smile she gave the waitress who saw her doing it. As he looks down into her eyes to ask her what she would like he too notices the plunging neckline of her dress is allowing anyone above her to see her tits. He sees her nipples standing out exceptionally far and hard from the soft roundness of her breast.  It excites him making him leak once again. He can feel the wet warmth released from the eye of his cock. After asking her what she would like he gently blows down the front of her dress. His breath running down her neck across her brwasr and to her nipples. He swears it looks like they just got bigger from that. He turns to the waitress noticing she saw this too. Her reaction is priceless. Her almost hypnotic state excites him. She TOO wants and desires his little pet nestled softly and safely against him as his strong arm holds her tight. He blinks his eyes several times. The light starting to creep its way into the room is almost blinding. He rubs them trying to get the sleep out of them as he looks around and then checks out the clock. Looking down at his crotch he realizes his cock is still hard. There's even a couple wet spots on his underwear. Clearing his head he slowly gets up to go make coffee. Wow that was one hell of a dream he smiles to himself remembering it.  

November 4, 2024 @ 4:35pm  Hello Everyone,  I understand this profile is a little confusing to some, let me clear things up for you all.I will always be an Domme first, then second I am an Alpha submissive only to Sir Silverback G which is my life partner. I hope this Clears up any confusion. Have a wonderful Morning, Evening, Night.  SG 

When we kiss When we kiss Bears and boulders Vibrate through the air i will probably do a whole post on laura veirs. her songs are little girl and softcore approved. but this song when i heard it over 10 years ago..this is love. just a simple share.   When you sing When you sing Stars fill up my eyes   Galaxies Pour down my cheeks Galaxies   Galaxies They flood the street Galaxies   When we dance When we dance Eels and sea grass float on by   I? m ten thousand leagues Beneath the sea Ten thousand leagues   Ten thousand leagues Beneath the green Ten thousand leagues   When we kiss When we kiss Bears and boulders Vibrate through the air   Gravity Is dead you see No gravity   All I need Is beating red No gravity   No gravity No gravity   No gravity No gravity   No gravity No gravity  

New year... Same sweet, smart-assed, serious and silly, socially-awkward sadist!  Big news for the new year: I've gotten a bunch done around the house on my own! For the first time in months, I've been able to move small things without fumbling around with braces and splints on each arm. *happy dance* The progress isn't hugely noticiable yet, but the fact I can do any of it has been exhilarating, and I want to do so much more while I can! That means I still need help. Especially because... I'm likely going to be returning to an old job soon. It's exciting, yet I also know it's a big responsibility that will have me away from the house more often. Upside: if I have a sub/slave/helper at that point, they can assist. It'll be a lot of fun. With a bit of luck, I'll find out in a few weeks whether my hands require surgery, and maybe I can get back to physically torturing willing souls sooner rather than later. I will be paring down The F0rm in a way that is better fitting for folx who are interested in being part time, or even simply live-in, with minimal or no D/s etc. There's rumor I may have a cage coming. *polishes halo* (Wait, shouldn't someone be polishing that for me?! LOL) May your 2023 start on a delightful note! Best wishes to All!   ~Blue (=

Hey, guys. Just so you know, this ain't my first rodeo. I was experimenting with S&M activities long before I was legal, or had actual sex. And so I call BULLSHIT on your "D/s is mainly mental" blah, blah, blah. A solid D/s relationship is a 3 legged stool of mind, body, and spirit. Each leg is equally important, and MUST be equally developed in order for there to be balance and harmony in the power exchange relationship. This is not optional, and you don't get to change the D/s laws of the universe just because you live 3000 miles away, or are trapped in a boring marriage. Mind. BODY. Spirit. For a masochist, one of these things MUST take place in person. So regular face to face meets are NOT optional. Smacking myself online while you watch does NOT count. And if you live more than 100 miles away, I'm not driving, or flying, to your place every week. It is what it is.

O/our marriage ceremony has finally taken place - my adored Wife & Mistress has solemnly sealed Her Female Domination (: She has granted my humble request and taken possession of me as her devoted property. She accepted me plighting my irrevocable troth to submit myself unconditionally to Her will and wishes and to be at Her service at all times. In a ritual inspired by the “Cybelian Marriage”, She has affirmed Her vision for O/our relationship, how She wants to use and arrogate Her devoted property in the future and how She wants to be lacking for nothing.i have to report on the ceremony and the new dynamic that has entered O/our relationship here in the coming months and have to be available for Your feedback and answers.my adored Wife & Mistress sends her warmest regards to A/all those who live Female Domination and those who are subordinate to her! U/unsere Ehezeremonie hat endlich stattgefunden - meine angebetete Ehefrau & Mistress hat Ihre weibliche Herrschaft feierlich besiegelt (: Sie hat meiner demütigen Bitte stattgegeben und mich als Ihr ergebenes eigentum in Besitz genommen. Sie hat mir das unwiderrufliche Gelübde abgenommen, mich Ihrem Willen und Ihren Wünschen bedingungslos unterzuordnen und Ihr jederzeit treu zu Diensten zu sein. Sie hat in einem von der "Cybelian Marriage" inspirierten Ritual Ihre Vorstellungen an U/unsere Beziehung bekräftigt, wie Sie Ihr ergebenes eigentum künftig nutzen und benutzen und es sich an nichts fehlen lassen will.Über die Zeremonie und die neue Dynamik, die in U/unsere Beziehung Einzug gehalten hat, habe ich hier in den nächsten Monaten zu berichten und für Reaktionen und Fragen zur Verfügung zu stehen.meine angebetete Ehefrau & Mistress lässt alle, die weibliche Herrschaft leben und alle, die ihr untergeordnet sind herzlich Grüßen!  

Well, it is nearing the end of 2022 and since we are very limited to update profiles on the site… I figured I would get an update here.   Well, it is nearing the end of 2022 and since we are very limited to update profiles on the site… I figured I would give an update here.   I am 44 years old, still living in the Fort Lauderdale Florida area, and I have an open marriage.    Have an open marriage.   It is not so easy to correspond care, feel free to find me with the same name on fet. i've been involved in the lifestyle since about 2000 and I am only looking for real connections.   if you just want to chat and are too far away to meet. Please look for someone that is interested in the same things as you. That will not be me.   I still love to serve, love the smell of leather, and love hypnosis. Most other things are negotiable.   Thanks for reading.   thanks for reading. Becca

I'm not quite sure how this site works or where this post will show up, but I'm up late and wondering....another post got me thinking, and I'm off on a tangent. I guess I'm trying to make a shift from my vanilla life to this new and exciting life. The vanilla life is easy, I guess, kinda, I can have sex, yay, it's easy, I can lie and say I like it, I want to be with you, and have a relationship. But all the time my brain, and penis, knows better, I'm thinking how I can convert you to be my perfect kinky partner. I CAN'T. I KNOW! FU#K! So now what? I'm tired of lying, feeling guilty. Virginisinism sounds good for now I guess.

Just a note — I'm probably not going to gel very well with other sub trans girls, but I'm happy to share pics and chat about our desires, so please don't hesitate to contact me if you like what you see in my profile.   Also, again a note for trans Dommes — I like Mommy Dommes who know that D/s goes both ways. I will happily fluff your ego and make you feel great about yourself if you can treat me like a baby girl who needs pampering, attention and love just in the same way. I will be as obedient to you as I can without doing anything immoral or illegal, of course, and I'll flatter, obey, pump up your ego, and be sweet and submissive to you just like a subbie baby girl or DMlg sub should be.   Same applies if you're an exceptionally good Daddy or Mommy cis Dom/me. I see so many selfish and egotistical profiles from most Dommes which are a huge turn off — the lecturing about throwing away your ego as a sub will work out long-term when you're ready to throw away your female or male ego as a Dom/me, and realize that you're serving your subs needs like they serve yours. They're your priority too, and you need to make them feel good about themselves serving you if you want them there forever. A young and horny boy or girl will serve you to get their needs for some sexual satisfaction fulfilled, but they'll be tired of your galaxy-sized ego saying that you're always right and they're always wrong just because of your relationship dynamics.A similar idea for subs: Please don't ever neglect the need for aftercare for Dom/mes too. They need it as much as you, and they're probably less confident, powerful and in control than you think. It's still a roleplay in a sense, and they have the same doubts as you about their performance. Before or after you get confirmation from them that you were a good boy/girl, be sure to puff up and stroke their egos too and tell them how you loved serving them, that they're a great Daddy/Mommy, etc. Please use your imagination. If your owner isn't good at communicating this back, be sure to ask them for an ego boost and validation as well. Don't stay with them if they become selfish and demanding, though, this is not a one-way street. You have valid needs and you need to ask for them to be fulfilled, too.

Master does not chat with prospective slave property before inspection.   Exception: I will offer a picture of Master and the opportunity to ask limited questions to potential slave property that completely fill out My questionnaire. it may request the opportunity to complete the questionnaire any time after a firm date and time for inspection has been established.   Some slaves may find the questionnaire too invasive. In the process of taking a slave property into My domain I will sooner or later know everything about it. It is just a matter of timing: tell Me now or tell Me later. Send its email address when requesting questionnaire.  I prefer to use email for this exchange.   Reading all the material Master has here on offer will divulge much about what slave may expect as property.

Having spoken to you for a few weeks now, we understand each other. Our face to face meeting is at hand. I know what motivates your need to serve and please your man. In the vanilla world, you have confidence - or at least a veneer of confidence you maintain - but internally you feel yourself unsure, uncertain and that sometimes you just want to run away. I pick you up, dust you down with warm encouraging words, embracing you as you feel the strength of me and know I give you care and comfort. I know you. I know your thoughts, I know your experiences and I know what you need from me. I know your hard limits and the agreed safe signals.  We share a strong connection already. We have an emotional bond and an excitement between us as we plan to become a unity, planning our homelife and talking about our values of partnership and family together. I value your intelligence, your feminine elegance and your utter submission to me, only me. Your devotion, loyalty and eagerness to please whilst still maintaining your vanilla pride and confidence - I respect that and appreciate those qualities. You enjoy the guidance I give you, my mentoring, the boundaries that I give you and my affection.  Soon, you will arrive. We have discussed this many times. We know what to expect of each other, and yet, there is still that excitement. I hear footsteps approach my front door ... 

After talking with someone on here recently I've done a lot of thinking about my desire to submit and be bound. I had never really thought about how long I've felt that way or why. Looking back on my teen years I think I've always had a fascination with restraint. My first sexual dream revolved around me getting "caught" and bound up. Looking back I have a few memories where even when I was younger there was something about being restrained that appealed to me. Now, as an adult, I think my feelings now are rooted in my desire to be helpless. I'm fortunate enough to have had a safe life, and I've never been in a bad scenario where I was in significant danger, and I suspect that may have something to do with it. Regardless, I think my root desire is to be helpless, forced to trust another person and do what they say. Something about giving into that power and giving up total control is what I really want. i don't know fully, just been thinking about it recently and these are my first thoughts. Thanks everyone for teaching me more and helping me explore these feelings!

  Profile update with a journal entry vibe.    I have been hesitant to give a profile update because I don't know. I am still figuring it out. I'm not new, but things change. I still have a lot of the cravings, both for lifestyle and the kink, but I have changed, and so have my cravings. I'm sure, with the right partner, they will continue to change into something different than what they are now. I don't think vanilla will ever be something for me to return to, but the things I value in a BDSM relationship are changing.  I don't really care for the "alpha" chest puffing in the 24/7. Kink, though, that's a different story. I'm also not a slave. I am attracted to wisdom and knowledge, and not the kind that is faked by pretending to know everything, the kind that also isn't afraid to admit he might occasionally be able to learn from his sub, especially if he has found the right match. I want a connection where even if everything else fades, the kink, romance, there are two people who vibe well enough, that at the core of it, there is still a connection and bond of friendship. I still crave a power exchange, don't get me wrong, but I am looking for more of a mentor type relationship dynamic than a master type. I think the closest category that fits might be DDLG, but I admit, I also don't feel quite like little fits.  As I write this, I am coming up on a year of being single. A relationship that started with lifestyle, but no kink, faded into something more like a vanilla friendship, and had a bit of a rocky ending. My point in sharing this, though, is that although I am not new, I spent years in a relationship lacking of kink. My tolerance, both in kink and in 24/7 is low again. My cravings may grow as strong as they once were, one day, but I also feel like I have done a lot of growing up over the years, and I have developed some vanilla cravings. It's no longer healthy for me to give all of myself until it's gone, as one example. These are the things I am still trying to sort out. How the remaining kink and lifestyle cravings fit in with what I no longer want. I am hoping to find someone who aligns with what I am craving at the moment, who wouldn't be afraid to do a little growing, both as a person and as an exploration of kink, but this person is going to need to be someone who is comfortable with boundaries and limits while I figure this out.  For now, this is where I am.  Edit to add 1-1-2026   I am not willing to relocate outside of traveling distance. I am not a person who does well with big changes, so this one is a big boundary. I am not close minded to something long distance, but it would reqire a lot of negotiating and trust. I am past the age where I want to start a family, living with a partner isnt that important, but other things are. So distance isnt a disqualifier, it just takes a lot of communication and some extra work. But I won't relocate. 

I cheated on my wife, and I wound up paying for it.   I had gone out on my wife, and my sister-in-law found out about it. She told me she wouldn't tell her sister if I agreed to help her. After all, they weren’t that close, and she knew she could be a bitch. I agreed, and she told me to be at her place on Friday night at 8:00. I asked why, and she said you’ll see.    I got there at 8. She met me at the door and asked if I was ready. I replied, “I guess.” She said, “Here’s the deal: me and some friends are having a toy party, and we need someone to demo the toys on.” I was a little nervous, but she said, “Oh, you will enjoy it, and if you want, you can back out." I couldn't let her tell on me, so I agreed. She said follow me to the den.    When we got there, I saw the fuck bench for the first time. She told me to strip and hop up. I asked what it was for, and she said it would be easier to demo cock and ball toys and lubes or anything else. She said, "Hurry up; the girls will be here anytime." So I did, and she strapped me in and then blindfolded me. I never knew who the women were who were there that night. Let's say that, like my sister-in-law, they had more curves than the women in the following video. And you know how much women with curves excite me.   She left the room, and in no time, I could hear voices coming in the living room. Women laughing and drinking and looking at sex toys. After a while, how long I couldn't tell you because I had lost track of all time, I heard her tell them she had another surprise in the den. I hoped that none of these women got too drunk or knew my wife.   They walked in, and they all couldn't believe it. They told her that when she held a party, she held a party. She told them to get their favorite toy and try it out. I could feel hands rubbing my cock and balls and ass. Before long, I felt the first dildo rubbing my lips and then another, and they just seemed to get bigger and farther down my throat. Finally, I heard her say, “Is anyone going to bust this ass cherry, or am I going to have to bust it myself?” I tried to protest but my words came out all muffled and unintelligible because of the dildo that was shoved into my mouth. She said keep that dick down his throat, girl, to keep him quiet.    Well, she had a strap-on belted already because in just a few seconds, she was behind me squirting lube on my ass and fingering it in, and then I felt her pressing the head of her cock against my helpless asshole. She said you need to relax, and you will enjoy this, I promise. She just kept steady pressure, and it just kept stretching me out until it finally popped in. She was a very muscular and sexy gal, and she worked out every day, so I knew she could give me a very good pounding if she wanted. She wanted. As soon as her cock went in, she started fucking slowly but with increasing speed and depth. Before long, she had her feet up on the bench next to my legs and was squatting fucking me with blistering speed and to the point I could feel the sack of the strap-on bottoming out on me. With the cheers of the women, she only seemed to get faster and harder.    Needless to say, I took several "cocks" in both ends before the night was done. She saw the last woman out, then came back. As she was undoing the restraints, she thanked me for going along with the night and making her so proud in front of her friends. She finished freeing me, leaned over, and kissed me. Not a friendly sister-in-law kiss, but a deep, wet, passionate one, which I returned. Without another word, she led my naked ass to her bedroom. I spent the night, and when I awoke, I knew my marriage was over.   With thousands of porno videos out there, I could not find one with a male on a similar bench, but lots of ones with females on all sorts of benches, swings, chairs, etc. This one is almost like my sister-in-law’s, so I include the link more for explanation than demonstration. The second link is a video of how the night seemed to go for me in my mind.   https://www.etsy.com/listing/1219988334/spanking-bench-sex-bench-bdsm-bench?ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=sex+bench&ref=sr_gallery-1-5&pro=1&organic_search_click=1   https://xhamster.com/videos/anal-extreme-for-kinky-butt-slut-7573248

Okay. Okay. I need to get some things off of my chest. Now that I have had some conversations, met a few people, I just want to say that I have standards and I would want my Dom to also be a person of standards. What do I mean by that? I make the effort to always be clean, smelling nice, looking pretty, etc. The bare minimum should be that my Dom takes some care of himself. I like when a man has taken the time to get a haircut,I like it when I can smell cologne on your skin, and after 11 years of trying to change a person, I realized that I indeed changed. We didn't want the same things and I got so tired of trying to convince someone to take care of themselveswhen I'm a fucking mess myself. Like, I need, absolutely crave Daddy but I haven't found him yet. If you're serious about something 24/7 and this is not strictly a kink for you, we might have some things in common. I've noticed some red flags one is that the people I was communicating with, they always want to be called Daddy and like, no. You're not my Dom, I don't know you like that, things take time to develop. Also, if you're weird, Do not bother. For example, I'm not into pantyhose and for one person, that was a deal breaker. Good. Keep that shit away from me. I'm trying to find my perfect match on every level. Also, I don't want your money, I have my own. It might not be a lot but I am not interested in any weird financial stuff. I'm trying to get my shit together in the real world. And all I want is Daddy. I don't think anyone understands how fucking primal that urge has become for me. But please don't come on too strong. Give me time. I'm thinking about a normal conversation here, then on text. Then the phone. Then a video call. You see what I'm doing here? Look if things went well maybe I fly out for a fun weekend. I don't know but I'm open.

To clear up some answers before you reach out. I am a Bigger Person. I am around 290 in weight and have put a lot of energy, time, and effort into myself. I go to a nutritionist every other week, stick to my meds, and have no issue with my size. If you are not into me at 290 (about 30 pounds lighter than earlier this year), then I will not be into YOU when I am lighter than 290.  I am biologically female, Assigned Female At Birth, and identify as non-binary. I am no longer in a power dynamic. I am looking for people interested in a non-traditional service submissive with particular specialties. I have realized I am more of an alpha personality because if there is too much drama/ multiple alphas, I will back off and do my own thing. I am loyal as fuck but independent as well. I am looking for Sadists who enjoy physical, emotional, and psychological play while being aware of their mental and physical health. I am aware of my mental health; I expect you to be mindful of yours.  

Waitress the Musical is in theaters for a few days, in case you were not aware. I saw it twice. I have been listening to the soundtrack for quite some time so while I'm familiar with the music and the story, it was nice to put it all together. It gave it more meaning, and definitely endeared several songs and characters that I had quickly dismissed prior. I highly recommend it if you have time tomorrow. Last day.  There is this one character, Dawn. She works at the diner and is quite quirky and loveable. She has a song that is entertaining, and in my opinion, extremely heartbreaking. There are two lines that hit me: What if when he sees me, what if he doesn't like it? What if he runs the other way and I can't hide from it? What happens then?What if when he knows me, he's only disappointed? What if I give myself away only to get it given back? I couldn't live with that. I feel that so much. That feeling of not being sure, thinking I'm not enough. That I'm not worth the effort. It's something that resurfaces in rocky relationship times. And sometimes for no reason at all. To drown it out I need to be loved out loud. Consistently. To quote another song, this one sung by Dawn's also quirky beau: I love you like a table. Cover me in stuff and I will hold it up, strong and stable. I love you like a table.  I'm a lot of work. I know this. I also know that somebody out there won't mind. 

Kids dog was trying to cough something up and was acting really odd. Called the vet for an emergency trip. Turns out it was a good thing. The dog has Gastric dilatation-volvulus (GDV) and is having emergency surgery UPDATE  Dog is ok, $1,500-$2,000 out to the vet who did surgery at midnight. Doggie is home sleeping it off. Poor poor baby though, looks so sad. The vet and her hubby had to carry her out to my car and she weighs just under 100 pounds. We however could not carry her in the house. After a lot of gently leading got a sleepy dog into the home and into her bed. Poor thing was still so out of it, she pooed over herself and had to have an outside cold bath at like 5 am. Poor Poor puppy

When it comes to phallic worship I am the altar and the sacrament. I begin by washing thoroughly and I cover my body around my phallus leaving the phallus and the testicles exposed after the person who is to worship bathes, perfumes his body and   approaches slowly with the sight on the vision I am offering him. He kneels, and anoints the phallus with honey, almond oils, sweet oil, (all edible) and prays. No touching at this moment just gazing. Slowly he extends the offerings to the testicle, the reservoir of universal power and caress them requesting permission to approach the phallus. At this moment there is no touching, kissing or tasting the phallus, just caressing and enjoying the testicles as the source of power. Eventually I allow him to caress the phallus and anoint it thoroughly but not to masturbate. This phase is a phase of discovery and joy. Since I am uncut this is the time to begin retracting the skin to reveal the glans and to taste whatever comes from it. This process will take time and no sexual play is allow, its prayer time. The session can end there and after a while it while after washing the phallus and anointing it with oils and essences the worshipper is allow to commune with the phallus orally. If the ministrations are right and he deserves, I will allow the climax for both of us. If not he must come back until he is worthy of the nectar that creates the universe. Now I have my own rituals to initiate those who worship before allowing them to approach the altar and the sacrament.

The Lesson in the Red Chair (part one) T.L. Duncan He showed up trembling. Not from fear—at least, not the kind he admitted—but from the anticipation he’d been drowning in for weeks. Every message he sent dripped with eagerness, with that hungry little please he tried to hide behind politeness. I opened the door before he had a chance to knock twice. “Inside,” I told him. He obeyed instantly, the good ones always do. My living room was dim, lit only by the soft glow of the salt lamp and the single, deliberate spotlight shining down on the red leather chair in the center of the room. That chair wasn’t decorative. That chair was ritual. “Shoes off.” He complied. “Phone on the table.” Another instant reaction. Good. His training hadn’t even begun and he already understood offering control. I circled him slowly, letting silence do the work. The air between us tightened when I brushed a strand of hair behind his ear—not to comfort him, but to claim space. His breath hitched, and that was when I knew: he’d fall beautifully. I stopped in front of him. “You said you wanted structure,” I said. “Discipline. To feel owned for one hour.” His gaze dropped to the floor. “Yes, Ma’am.” “Look at me.” He obeyed again, the word Ma’am still warm in the air. I placed a finger under his chin. “Then you’ll start by kneeling.” He sank to the floor so fast I almost laughed. Not cruelly—just with the quiet satisfaction of someone who has seen this dance a thousand times and still enjoys every second. “Knees apart. Hands behind your back. Shoulders straight.” He adjusted three times before he got it right. Nervous boys forget how their bodies work when they’re desperate. I walked behind him, lifted his hair, and inspected the vulnerable line of his neck. “So sensitive,” I murmured. “If I pressed my thumb here, you’d melt.” He swallowed hard. I didn’t touch him yet. Not physically. Instead, I moved to the red chair, sat down, and crossed my legs with deliberate slowness. “Crawl.” He hesitated, only for a breath. Then he placed his palms on the floor and moved toward me like he’d been waiting his whole life to be commanded that way. His breath shook with every inch he traveled. When he reached the foot of the chair, he stopped and waited. “Good,” I said, letting the approval slide over him like warm oil. “Now put your head on my knee.” He rested his cheek against my thigh as if it were a pillow he’d spent years searching for. His exhale was a confession. I stroked his hair once—reward, not affection. “You crave rules because the world expaspects you to be strong,” I said softly. “But here, strength is mine. Obedience is yours.” “Yes, Ma’am…” “And you take direction beautifully. That’s why I chose you for tonight.” His whole body trembled. I slipped my fingers into his hair and pulled his head back—not harsh, not gentle, but precise. His lips parted, surprise and need blending into something addictive. “There are three things you’re going to learn,” I told him. “One: listen when I speak. Two: obey the first time. Three…” I leaned in, my breath barely brushing his ear. “Never make me repeat myself unless you want consequences.” A shiver shot through him so sharp it might as well have been an orgasm. I smiled. “Now,” I said, loosening my hand but not releasing him. “Your lesson begins.” His head was still in my lap when I slid my hand from his hair to the back of his neck. He froze. Not from fear—no, he was far past that—but from the realization that he had no idea what would happen next. Good. Uncertainty is the first tool of sensory play. “Hands flat on your thighs,” I instructed. His palms landed instantly, but I tapped one with a single finger. “Softer. You’re not bracing for impact. You’re waiting for permission.” He corrected himself. Obedient. Attentive. Hungry. I reached to the side table, slowly enough that he heard my bracelets shift but not fast enough to interpret the sound. His breathing changed—shorter, quicker—as his imagination sprinted ahead of me. Let it. The first thing I picked up was the silk scarf. Not to blindfold him. Not yet. I simply let the fabric glide across his forearm. He inhaled sharply. “Too sensitive?” I teased. “No, Ma’am. Just… unexpected.” “Good. That’s the point.” I drew the silk back, then traced the same path with my fingertip—cooler, firmer, more precise. His skin twitched under the contrast. “Tell me what you feel,” I said. “Soft… then colder. Like my body’s trying to guess you before you touch me.” “Your body doesn’t get to guess. It gets to react.” He shivered, a subtle ripple that traveled from shoulder to knee. I reached again—this time to the small wooden wand, smooth on one end, textured on the other. I let him hear it roll across my palm. His breath caught; he recognized the sound but couldn’t place it. Perfect. I touched his wrist with the cool, rounded end. He sucked in a breath. Then I flipped it and dragged the textured side down the same line. He gasped—quiet, but the kind of sound a man makes when his brain can’t decide between pleasure and restraint. “Overwhelming?” I asked, lifting his chin with the wand. “Yes, Ma’am…” “Too much?” “No, Ma’am. More.” “Then you’ll stay still for it.” He nodded, and I rewarded him by letting the wand trail up his inner arm—slow, deliberate, circling closer to the bend of his elbow. He swallowed. He always swallowed when he was fighting the urge to

I've been lurking on this site, wondering whether to contact anyone and realising that I'm not sure what I'm looking for in many ways. I'm torn between wanting a committed 24/7 D/s relationship with a wonderful Domme, or osmething more casual because I'm conscious that I'm looking at transitioning, that I want to do a PhD, and that I have a load of books I want to write. I don't want to present myself as something I'm not, and I don't want to be with someone who seems intent on denigrating me from the off (and so a lot of Dommes' profiles have me backing away because of their tone).  I must admit too, that even though I think of myself as a decent writer, I'm coming up short with what to actually say to people. A simple introductory message feels like it could be fraught with danger, and yes that does seem incredibly stupid to say.  Anyway, I thought I would put something here just because "I ain't dead" as Granny Weatherwax from the Discworld books would put it. 

FINALLY A NEW STORY !!! May 31, 2025 - Football player takes a load then wants to have two orgasms! Sorry I have not written a story in quite some time, but this winter has been rough on me. I think I went through a dark place for a while but I'm feeling much better now that the weather is warming. Thursday was my birthday and Friday I got a message from football player saying he wanted to come over. For quite some time we've been trying to get him to orgasm twice during one visit. Well, we tried again today. When he first arrived, I was already in my birthday suit, completely naked relaxing in my easy chair with a hard-on. He came through the door and immediately began to strip his clothes off as always. He looked over at me in the chair and mumbled, "I've really needed this for a while." He started sucking on my cock. It was fantastic. As usual, as I looked down at his broad shoulders, the shoulders of a football player, it only made my cock get harder. He would alternate taking his time on my cock, deep throating it, and sometimes devouring it like a starving person at his first meal in weeks. I don't like to orgasm this quickly, I like to go to the basement, play for a while and finally drop a load in his ass. But after about 10 minutes of such a wonderful blowjob, even with his mouth full, I heard him say... "I've needed to swallow your load for the longest time." That was enough to put me over the edge. I tried to hold back a bit longer, but thinking how much he wanted my creamy, salty, sweet cum in his mouth was too much for me. I figured, why not? Maybe today is the day I will have two orgasms. I put my hands on his wide shoulders and felt myself getting closer and closer to the edge. As he deep-throated me once, and I felt my cock getting lodged in the back of his throat, it was too exciting. I started making the grunting noises so that he knew I was about to fill his mouth. He pulled off my cock almost completely leaving just ahead in his mouth. He wanted to taste everything. And I did not disappoint. I let him have a huge load. I felt ribbon after ribbon of cum squirt into his mouth. He swallowed, and kept sucking. He was definitely attempting to drain me completely dry. My cock was still hard so I just let him keep sucking for a while until he had every last drop out. Then I said, let's head downstairs and take care of you now. We went downstairs and he hopped into the sling. I put his ankles in the stirrups. There was no need to tell him to scoot down in the sling so I could access his hole more easily, he's done this enough times that he was perfectly positioned. His cock was still hard, and his ass puckered for me. I put a pair of rubber gloves on and started to lube up his hole.  TO READ THE ENTIRE STORY VISIT  https://www.sirkel.top/?collarspace

It will be OK Two drifting people on different ways,Living limited lives from distant days.Surrounded by many, yet still alone,Both in houses, but neither at home.A chance encounter - light, no more -Stirred something deep in each to the core.Old memories woke, a future appeared,New beginnings whispered where caution had steered.One stepped forward, the other stepped back,Too much to carry, too much to track.Too deep for one heart to sustain,And early joy gave way to pain.Like moths to flame they circled still,Neither yet ready for the bitter pill.Until at last he spoke his truths,Releasing both back to their roots.They dared to dream - and will again -Just not together.That much is plain.

On Jealousy in the Master/slave Dynamic Jealousy is a corrosive force within a Master/slave relationship. It is the enemy of structure, the destroyer of authority, and the betrayer of trust. Where jealousy exists, leadership falters. A Master’s role is to stand as the embodiment of certainty and command, yet jealousy undermines this by planting insecurity where strength should reside. Insecurity breeds suspicion, suspicion breeds resentment, and resentment fractures the very foundation upon which the Master/slave bond is built. A jealous Master ceases to lead with clarity. Instead, he reacts from fear, clouding judgment and weakening authority. The slave, whose role is to serve in confidence and devotion, becomes hesitant. Obedience shifts into caution, and devotion turns to apprehension. A slave cannot flourish under the shadow of jealousy, for it suffocates the freedom of surrender and replaces it with doubt. This is why jealousy cannot be tolerated—it disrupts the natural order and erodes the respect upon which all dominance rests. Furthermore, jealousy is weakness exposed. A Master must be the anchor, the standard, and the pillar of certainty. To be consumed by envy is to show the slave that his authority has cracks. When a slave perceives these cracks, reverence diminishes, and the Master’s position is compromised. Authority that bends to jealousy is no true authority—it is performance without substance. A Master ruled by such impulses becomes no more than an equal to his slave, which destroys the hierarchy. Correcting Jealousy The cure for jealousy lies in discipline, self-mastery, and reinforcement of order. Several steps must be taken: Uncompromising Honesty – Communication must be enforced. A Master must demand full truth from his slave and give unclouded truth in return. Jealousy thrives in silence and shadows; it dies when exposed to the light of direct speech. Reinforcement of Structure – Protocols, rituals, and rules must be upheld without compromise. When order is maintained with precision, the framework leaves no room for insecurity to grow. Clarity in expectations eliminates confusion, and clarity weakens jealousy’s hold. Practice of Self-Mastery – A Master must control himself before he can hope to control another. Jealous impulses must be recognized, acknowledged, and dismissed without indulgence. This requires discipline, reflection, and the will to remain above base instincts. Methods such as journaling, meditation, or ritualized reflection may be employed to strengthen the mind. Seeking Counsel – A wise Master does not fear counsel. Speaking with experienced Dominants or mentors provides grounding and perspective. No Master diminishes himself by learning; he diminishes himself only by refusing to correct weakness. Commitment to Strength – A Master must remember at all times that jealousy is beneath him. It is weakness, and weakness cannot lead. The slave must see strength that does not waver, for respect and obedience are born only from confidence in the Master’s unshakable command. Final Teaching Understand this: jealousy is incompatible with mastery. It is a betrayal of the title “Master” itself. Where jealousy reigns, authority is false, and leadership is hollow. Only through discipline, honesty, and unyielding strength can jealousy be eradicated. A true Master confronts it, defeats it, and stands as the anchor his slave requires. Let it be known: a jealous Master is unfit to lead until he masters himself.

There's something wrong with my calico, Luna, and I'm very worried. She's not acting like herself. She had a jaw issue the other day and ever since she's been drooling, hiding in the bathtub (she's not a jumper and never did this before), felt warm, acts restless, among other symptoms. She's 7. While not the norm, I've had cats last until 20. This is my familiar. Vet said her teeth look good but to keep an eye on her as she isn't eating the dry food, only wet. We did get her rabies shot done and I'm really hoping she's not having a reaction to it. Will call the vet in the morning and take her in asap. She didn't even fight being picked up, which she hates because she always thinks it's bathtime when she's picked up and usually will fight it and mewl so pitifully but she didn't do that this time. I tried to reach out to Bakayashu for help but he of course is still ignoring me. Whatever. I just hope I don't lose my cat, him, and have to send my kiddo back to her father in two days. I'm already battling horrible depression and barely keeping myself focused through it.  I feel so damn abandoned. Alone. And Baka's silence now just feels cruel.  I just want everything to go back to being good again. 

Under your feet-- On top of the world In my place I never get bored With a delicate touch, your tension I ease To pamper and please from heels to knees Gracefully you let me kneel in prayer As you sit before me with dignified airs Commanding respect, admiration; no flaw In humble submission I follow in awe The final touch in quiet repose A purple coat on each royal toe  

Being a submissive means being: Honest  Obedient subservient  Courteous Respectful Committed Disciplined Accepting Willingness Mindful Humility Eager An Asset Being Challenged More than a sex object  Willing to present:  Mind                                         Body                                         Spirit                                         Soul                                         Self  

PLEASE READ CAREFULLY DO NOT SEND DICK PICS OR NUDES NOT INTERESTED IN SEXTING I DO NOT WANT A SUGAR DADDY I DO NOT HAVE AN ONLYFANS ACCOUNT NOR DO I WANT ONE I'M NOT LOOKING TO MAKE CONTENT WITH ANYONE I DON'T WANT YOUR MONEY I'M NOT HERE TO TRADE PICS OR VIDEOS I AM NOT LOOKING FOR FWB NOT LOOKING FOR OR WANTING HOOKUPS. DO NOT CONTACT ME REGARDING HOOKUPS PERIOD. I DO NOT SUB OR PLAY OVER THE INTERNET. I'M NOT HERE FOR SEXTING I'M NOT INTERESTED IN BEING PART OF A COUPLE/POLY RELATIONSHIP MY HARD LIMITS AND BOUNDARIES ARE ANYTHING ILLEGAL, ANAL, ANIMALS, DRUGS OF ANY SORT, ANYTHING TO DO WITH HUMAN OR ANIMAL WASTE. DO NOT PUSH MY LIMITS/ BOUNDARIES OR YOU WILL BE REPORTED AND BLOCKED. ADDITIONAL HARD LIMITS/ BOUNDARIES FACE FUCKING, GAGGING, HUMILIATION,VOMIT, THIS WILL BE UPDATED WHEN AND IF I FIND MORE LIMITS AND BOUNDARIES.

So since I'm starting to look again for someone to bring into my dynamic i've had a few questions and statements as to why I am the way I am. I have PTSD for a few reasons. 1 relates to this lifestyle we arranged a hotel meet when the Mrs was still alive. We met what we thought was one person in a hotel room. It turned out it was an ambush and 2 other men were hiding in the toilet. I was beaten unconcious and they took turns on the wife without lube or protection. Then when I was out and they had finished with her they went to work on me. I was left with internal bleeding, left for dead and issues with my backside shall we say. So if I'm asking for patience or seem to take a step back, it probably has nothing to do with you as I do have flashbacks every now and again. If we do arrange a meet it would be somewhere safe first and there will be safe words and someone around just making sure everything goes ok, they will leave when I feel comfortable. If it ever does go to a 24/7 or prolonged meets, you may notice I do wake up in night terrors, it is to do with the above. I'd ask until I fully wake up just let me come around naturally.

November 15th, 2024 Back on collarspace!   November 4th, 2020 I had not been online for quite long. I just come to update my profile and to reply all those kind and gentle messages from my contacts. My life changed quite a lot and those days when all was fun and BDSM and long gone. I became a mother of two beautiful boys and with all the Covid19 situation, my life is reduced to motherhood. I love my family and do not regret it but I miss those days when I was never worried, I was always sitting pretty, dressing like the queen I am and being served by female and male subs. Perhaps some day that will happen again? )UPDATE  Yes, life evolves and keeps going!I moved to Belgium, I am in the process of divorcing but I am still in a poly relationship (that has not change). This is my second week in Belgium and I am hoping soon to be ready to get involve in the local BDSM scene.I would love to get to know people around here and know how things work around. It would be great to get a domestic slave and an assistant, a Lady is always in constant need of attention...............................................................................................................Relocating soon to Belgium...

Slave's Supplications or devotions Slave's Supplications or devotions: I beg you to use me for your pleasure. I desire nothing more than to be an that you can use for your enjoyment at any time. I beg You to allow me to please you. I beg to be made to live to worship you. Make me give you thanks when you honor me with punishment at your hand. My real punishment is having failed, and having disappointed you I would not deserve your attention. My body and mind are your property, now and until you may decide you have no further use for me. I beg you to make me feel your ownership of me everyday. Please, make me feel Your power over me, and Your total control of my life. I submit willingly to your power and domination. Please, make me feel my submission and your control throughout my day. I want to obey, serve and please you. Please allow me the privilege of calling you Master. I realize my sexuality and my orgasms are now your property, allowed to me as a special gift. I beg you to punish me severely if I ever have an orgasm without permission. I choose willingly to be treated as your property. I beg you to own me utterly and completely. I beg you to make me behave, and be a good boy/girl. Please allow me the privilege of your discipline when I misbehave. I beg you to control my clit/cock. When I may touch it, when it may be excited and when it may come. I know my cock/clit now belongs to you. I beg to be your property. Please help me become your greatest treasure. Living in Your Grace, my Master my God.

Her hands held the pen, the black ink swirling across the page as she signed the contract. The last time she would ever see her real name, the last time her date of birth would even matter. She paused, holding her breath in her shuttering lungs… and as the seconds ticked by like years, her lung’s released and the chime rang. The electronic paper instantly sealed the contact and the encryption code saved to the nanochip.A metal arm came from the wall, and in a quick second her eyes blinked, and the chip engaged.She was still her, her personality, her smile, her spirit, but her body now belonged to the New American Order. She fought as long as she could, the price of housing and food had risen so high she was living so poorly. They had removed all unchipped teachers long ago, uncipped could not work jobs that paid in NAObitcoin. She could only get paid in paper money which only unchipped could spend. The black market was dangerous and she knew the consequences.The government now allowed people to elect to be chipped as household wifes. They would live a normal life, raising children, and making their families a unit, and thus rebuilding the community which once made this nation strong.She was a beautiful women, her long auburn hair landed in near perfect curls, her beautiful eyes could sink the universe. She held a PHD and would make an excellent home school teacher for a man who had a large family.She sat in the chair, gripping the skirt if the dress, and staring at the wall. A screen came on and the host started talking.“Gentlemen of the NAO tonight we have a wonderful selection of wives. They have all signed in willingly so there are no confinement rules for these women. Lets get started.”The door to her room opened and she stepped in to the hall. She took the step and closed her eyes, her sister got a nice man, they are so happy. She was going to have the same, she knew it.“First we have this beautiful older model, she will bare no children, but she is sweet and caring. She has a good voice, pleasant demeanor, tested level 9/10 in cooking and house keeping, she scored 10/10 in intellect. As you know gentlemen she will be tested for sexual abilities, her current rating in the outside was 4.6 so definitely above average but those chipless have no idea.”The door opened at the end of the hall, she walked quickly to the door, she had watched this millions if times on the tele. It had become required viewing but the poor only got to see the limited view, they put so many propaganda commercials in the show it was hard to really understand what was happening.The men in the room were all high class government officials, they were all men who had created the order, and their first wives were probably in work camps, or dead from the war. The rebels attacked their homes and wives, so many ran to other countries at the end of the war. Now other countries were turned to watch as NAO rebuilt and became the world leader of technology and education.The days of the starving poor was over, well as long as you chipped up. If you were a normie your life didnt change except you had no rent, no bills, but you worked for the government and ate what the government gave you. It wasnt a horrible life, you married in your class, and lived happy. The problem came with people like her. She was smart enough to live with out the system, pretty enough to be a wife, refined and well skilled, and her date rating put her on their radar.She only signed up to find a match, she was sick of her lonely home. They just started letting nochips on the site and she knew better!When her rating hit its highest the rent in her area went up, the power for vehicles tripled, food prices doubled. She got a speeding ticket and that was it… she couldn’t pay her rent… and there Lacy was, to offer her a spot in the highest ranked tv show in the History of the planet. It was required watching in the NAO and many international countries allowed their citizens to watch and participate, part of the new Jenniva treaty.So here she was, the room was black, the ceiling back, the bed and everything painted in the darkest black. She stepped to the door and the door behind her shut.“Remove your dress and precede to the bed.” The audience wouldnt see anything, its black, there is no light, but there are speakers and they can hear everything. She pulled her dress off and sat it next to the bed. She was stark naked, her large breasts we’re hanging from her, her body shivered as her hair tickled her back. She crouched down and lay down on the bed.“Place your right hand on the board. Place your left hand on the left board.” Her arms moved and then click the magnet locked, they had implanted her with magnets and chips throughout her body. The lights clicked off. For a second she could hear movement and then the headphones clapped down on her head. Hands ran down her body and the audience cheered as the meter stared to rise. His hands found her face and he pulled her in to a kiss, his tongue darting about and dancing with hers. His other hand found her pussy, and he clamped his hand down. The meter went to 1.0, and then his finger slipped inside, her body wetting for him, his head tilted, and his eyes flickered in to the darkness. “Ohhh a fun one.” He whispered in her ear. His fingers began working her clit and her body responded, he rubbed and twisted and pulled as she moaned loudly. Her chip holding her back from orgasm but leaving her right in the edge. He paused, and his mouth found her breasts which made her moan loudly again as the meter kept rising 3.0,4.0,7.0. The crowd started to whisper as no one had ever gotten higher than 8 and she was just starting. He pressed his cock against her, his large head pushing hard, as her rating went higher, and then he pushed in, hard. His huge cock filling her and pushing hard against the top of her as she moaned loudly, the harder he pushed the rougher he got the more she moaned and flooded him. Her hips moved with his, drawing him deeper, harder as she ground herself in to him. He reached up and put his hand on her neck, the default for allowing an orgasm during testing and she came. Her vagina pressed in on him pulsating hard as he continued to pound her, she came hard over and over moaning loudly. He stopped for a second and stepped back. “Turn over.” Her wrists released, and she flipped over, she had not had sex like this in years, she forgot it was anything other than a glorious night of love. He gripped her hips and pressed his cock in to her ass, as she arched her back and moaned out loudly. He started to work her ass slowly and then harder and harder pounding her hard. She shook as his hips hit her ass with a force she couldn’t believe. It almost took her breath how hard and good it felt. He reached up and grabbed her hair and held it tight slamming in to her harder, his other hand found her clit. He wouldn’t let her cum, he had decided now she didn't get anymore, they were all his. He pressed harder and harder, her body sweating and her breathing rough he continued, as he came he slapped her ass hard. The number blinked on the wall 8.7 highest first test score. The room blacked.. the commercial started, and men whispered among themselves.“I think i might have enough to purchasing that one.” A tall dark gentleman spoke. The room fell silent, as a bell rang which meant a second test was requested. The testing fee was not cheep, but someone needed to know her limit.Two men with night vision glasses came in and helped her straddle a round saw horse, her leg magnet locking in place, her wrists, she could no longer move.“Its time for the maximum orgasm test!” The host spoke in an over excited tone, his own body reacting to the sights. The lights turned off and above her head a digital board read 4.“According to the chip she has already orgasmed 4 times, remember folks the highest score ever is 70, in 2hours and 10 min. Once we start this test we will continue the auction.She was cold, but as soon as she felt it the sensation went away, the chip overriding the warning. A buzz starts in the background and her body starts to prepare, the sound of a milker clicking away behind her also made her body react. The buzz and tick tick take her in to a trance, and her body relaxes. He inserts a large 1 inch dildo inside if her, he clips the vibratior clamp on her clit as she lets out a loud yelp.“Mute her please.” The host says quietly. The man hits a button and her moans quiet and she starts to orgasm.“Oh no not yet kitten we aren’t even there yet.” His deep voice echoed in her ear, as thr command found its protocol, her body slowed the orgasm, and then liquid squirts on her ass as he presses in and works a large plug, its vibrations start to sink with the dildo. Her entire body clamped down, which only made the sensation stronger as she orgasmed hard. "oh yeah I should… release." as the word echoed in her empty mind the orgasms rushed in..10,11,12,13… her biometric system counting orgasm after orgasm.He smiled in to the dark as the goat milker cups attached to each breast and turned on low, then higher and higher, as it sucked her 38h breasts deep in to the glass, 22,23,26.He stood there watching with his night vision , his prize will be a percentage of her price, 30,31,32. He grabbed a flogger and whipped her ass hard, a flood of orgasms came in 41,43,44. He spanked her again, 50."Gentlemen our special purchase has hit 50! can you believe that? alright next is 35, rating 4.5, cooking 6 but comes with optional upgrade option, overall sex rating 8 with a maximum daily use 3 times… the bidding starts at her debt to the NAO of 100 Naobitcoins. Let the game begin. " the host pointed to the screen where bids were flying in from all over the world."The timer has started… bids are up to 2,000… 2,300… 3,2,1. 2,600 NAOBC… And your name is Cynthia. congratulations and may you live in the peace of your submission. " the audience said along with the host."now were are we at with our live test… 67 in 30 min, 68,69,70! she beat the record! She sucked breath in to her lungs as her body just kept going, she was dripping with sweat, her body begging for help, her moans muted her voice box turned off as she cameover and over. The machines clicked off her body shivered, and the chip took over, her hands and legs released as she stood, her brain not fully functioning. She walked to the bed her legs shaking and pulled her dress on. A door opened to a bathroom, an entire crew of beauty and glamor experts stood there. They had one commercial break to make her look fresh. She was pushed in to a shower the water spraying up and down on her in all directions. The water turned to warm air as she stepped from the shower dry and clean, the stockings slid on and clipped in to a pink and black garter. the corset top clipped in to place and then tied tight. her dress was slid over her head, and tightened down. Her hair was twisted and twirled and her makeup went on fast, a blinking light told the crew it was time.“Gentlemen it is time. How much would you pay? The time starts now…..” the     

Things have been very rough this last few years. In the middle of the horror I discovered my exact needs and desires. All are leaning to 24/7. A TRUE EXPERIENCED Dominant. One compatible of course. One with similar interests as we need time together outside of just bdsm. I need fully trained. Supervised. Someone who pays attention when I think I can get away with something though I try my best to be a good girl. Someone to nurture me. Guide me. Ensure I hydrate and eat properly.  I need the rules. The punishments. The after care and the sincere love. I am in a vanilla relationship and beyond unhappy.  I have had limited human contact in years. The vanilla is too old. Impotent and zero desire. We live separate lives. I am more of a care giver.  I am willing to move almost anywhere but as a full time submissive.  I'm too poor to use what little I have to move in and find out we aren't compatible.  So meeting 1st is a must. I am fine with a hotel or cabin or even fly to you but trust must be established.  I will accept nothing other than EXPERIENCED. I am not switch. I'm fully submissive.  I want 24/7 but also would like a little loosening on my chain to feel semi normal. Yes I expect completely your knowing my comings and goings at all time. Mutual interests are time well spent. What are you looking for in a submissive?  

She will spend her days at home nude … She will sleep in a cage unless she is being used by me at night. She will cook and clean and keep my home immaculate. In public she will dress slutty and be on display. She will call me Master in private and Sir in public. She will be very flirty and sweet to every man and boy. In public no bra or panties. She will exercise daily in the nude. She will shower daily as needed and shower with me every day. She will keep her body perfectly smooth and shave often. She will sit nude at my feet when I watch tv. She will speak to me in third person at all times and accept punishment when she makes errors. I will attach a permanent collar that she cannot remove, engraved with my name. I will have a tattoo placed on her left thigh, near her pussy. The letter “O”, for master obsidian, so all will know she is my property.

You know what I’ve noticed? A lot of you want to be owned—but none of you want to earn it. You slide into my inbox like you’ve already been claimed, like we’ve built something, like I even know your favorite color or what your voice sounds like when you’re trying not to moan. Spoiler: I don’t. It’s always the same—some lazy “hey gorgeous,” followed by a picture of your dick like it’s a résumé. You call it confidence; I call it laziness with bad lighting. You don’t build devotion through shock value. You build it through discipline, consistency, and showing up without needing to be begged for it. You want intimacy? You want that mind-melting, breath-stealing connection you fantasize about when your hand’s between your legs? Then stop treating Me like a vending machine for your kinks. You don’t insert your fetish and press D for Domme—that’s not how this works. You think you’re ready to be used, but you can’t even send a respectful message. You think I’ll give you access to My energy just because you find Me attractive? Cute. You’re aroused—and that’s supposed to be My problem? Flattery doesn’t earn you obedience. Desire doesn’t earn you access. And your dick definitely doesn’t earn you attention. You say you crave to serve, to please, to surrender—but you don’t understand that real submission requires something from you. Time. Effort. Patience. . Always sacrifice. You want to be worship? Earn the privilege. You want Me to care what you crave? Show Me why I should. Otherwise, you’re just another noise in the crowd—nameless, forgettable, replaceable. Because when you finally understand how to build intimacy, that’s when the real reward comes. That’s when a Domme looks at you and thinks, “Yes. He’s worth My time.” That’s when your devotion becomes currency—and it starts buying you experiences no instant message ever will.   Until then, keep your dick pics, your “hey sexy,” and your entitled fantasies. You haven’t earned the 

My late wife whom I lost 10 years ago, loved bondage in many forms. On a trip to vegas I setup a situation to totally driver her mad..... We went out to a nice dinner very well dressed and a show. She attired as follows for it..... thigh boots well heeled, stocking with garters PVC Garter belt, a steel chastity belt no plugs, all under a leather mini skirt, tight strong pvc under bust corset well laced, pvc string bra, covered with a white satin blouse. She was my arm candy for the night. Needless to say she was whispering in my ear delicious thoughts, needs, desires, and beggings to be used. Being so bound and restricted via the chastity belt meant she was not able to effectively finger herself in the booth as we ate and had to endure the knowledge that I controlled her sex and its release. When we retired after some gambling and teasing by both of us, once in the room she seductively stripped her shirt and begged me to release her, i made her spread against window in the hotel room and released her chastity and held her firmly by the hair and ravished her to my pleasure..... that evening she stayed booted and corseted and skirted but bound at the feet and wrists... I took her 2x more that night and she crawled on me begging for cock and talking about how much she was made into a object of sexual pleasure.

Noone Owes You A living In the last few weeks, I've learned a lot of painful lessons. Top of the list is learning that no matter how solid you may think something is, no matter how well built and diligently assembled you may feel it is, no matter how recently it's solidity was tested and found good and true, that something can fail with breathtaking speed. Literally here today, gone tomorrow. As a consequence, I find myself amazed that I STILL have to learn not to put too much reliance on one thing. We all need supports, we all need things and people in our lives that matter to us and who we matter to, but the lesson is that such things and people must, by virtue of necessity, be a plural. If we become too reliant on a single support then we run the risk that, should that support fail us then we fail with it. The collapse can be dangerous mentally, emotionally and physically because not only is so much of our structure built on that support, but there's not a huge amount left to work with when it's gone. So spread the load, don't put too many eggs in one basket and, whatever you do, don't put all the eggs in one basket. Secondly, and equally surprising that I STILL haven't learned it, is that as much as we want to be good for others and to show them love and support and kindness, we have to also do that for ourselves. We must remember to be an advocate for and believer in ourselves before we attempt to do those things for another. I feel this is for two reasons. Firstly, if we cannot be for ourselves what we seek to be for others, how much value does what we offer actually have in our own eyes? How can we offer ourselves to another if we don't think we have much value and, in truth, don't actually want or like our self? Isn't that basically re-gifting the shitty present you got for Christmas or a birthday, and if it is what kind of a way is that to treat or see either ourselves or the person we offer ourselves to? Aren't we essentially saying that we hold them in such high regard we want them to have something we don't value or like or have a use for? Secondly, assuming we do value our own love and support and kindness, we must always keep a personal stash of it just for our use. We must do this  otherwise we risk the damaging, diminishing effaspects of someone taking those valued parts of ourselves and, instead of giving us the best of them in return, suddenly deciding they've had their fill and they're moving on. We are left not just lacking in the resources we need to function in their absence, but also knowing that we only have ourselves to blame for assuming that just because we wanted the best for them doesn't mean they're obliged to want the best for us. And if they did once, we have no right to assume they will continue to do so just because we want them to. The third lesson is simple; people change, and nothing changes people like other people. We are all dynamic, constantly evolving and constantly discovering new places we want to go and new people want to be with and new people we want to become. And if that holds true for others then by definition it can and should hold true for us. We are not who we were, we are not really who we because really we're just constantly becoming who we will be. In the face of that, stability is an illusion and the only person we can and should truly depend on is ourselves. Everything and everyone else is temporary in our lives. We are permanent. And the last lesson is a cliche. If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, its yours forever. If it doesn’t, then it was never meant to be.

Instead of updating the profile and having it be down for months, I am using the journal to note changes.  I have collared a slave and it is serving in My home 24/7/365 I continue to train and develop other slaves that need experience serving, learning protocols, developing pain tolerence or just want to provide pleasure to a Master I am also looking for a second slave for a poly household. Mine is a Leather Family and I have many friends in the world Leather community. I have a process for evaluating a slave for ownership, if there is interest I can explain further. The new Dungeon Barn has finally been built. This 3 level dungeon is an all season timber frame barn built on a stone foundation. The interior is being finished and then equipment installed. Completion scheduled for winter 2021. Summer months We/we reside at our camp. Cothing optional, men only, with a complete dungeon there as well

Ladies - feel free to contact Me anytime to discuss your experiences here with the unfavorables.  I have an open door policy when it comes to protecting our interests and there are some parasites here who make it their lifes work to penetrate our defenses  in an effort to conquer through deception.  It is a rotten business and sours the landscape for honest and true relationships with men of distinction here. I was reading some journal entries of other dominant women and was alarmed at the amount of similarities to their journeys here.  Are we all speaking to the same men/man?  Its a fact that Mr. Mindf*ck is spreading his disinformation seed all over.  So I have started reaching out to other women.  Do you hear that you VOCATIONAL  POS PARASITE?  One way or another, you will find your breeding grounds drying up. You messed with a very nice but very dogged lady and while I forgive, I never forget an injustice.  So while you are creating or discharging both submissive and dominant entities, I will continue to contact other women and asking for them to reach out to Me if they wish to exchange notes.  Mind you, we too have form letters, so dont get your hopes up that energy is being spent on you - energy is being spent protecting women from predators such as yourself and energy is being spent in sisterhood ensuring men of worth have clear passage. Time to buckle up boys, Mama's Got a Brand New Bag!  Good luck! lol

  Enjoy breath play particularly during oral as well as being an overall submissive. Not only just in the bedroom but with him in general; taking notice of his interest and hobbies. Using that to find ways to please him until he feels satisfied with the disappearance of nuance stresses that plague all of us everyday. Having a Dom relax and not worry what he does or says and takes a breather without having to refocus on his sub and their needs is what I like. I get along well with confident dominant types. Smooth/trimmed body with a large smooth bubble butt. Thick 7in circumcised with low hangers. Into 1950's D/s servitude lifestyle of doting and pamperingEnjoy being slightly bullied, pushed around, asked to do things/chores, under foot, subservient younger bro/Dom Big Scenario with a Straight Guy - Happened over time when my straight friends noticed I'm passive with them. Sometimes I open up and they roll with it. Nothing too crazy when we're out and about but they say its nice to know I'm the bitch in the room.

i don't play a lot of video games. In fact, I don't have a gaming system made in the last decade. But once or twice a year when I visit my nephews, I play this game that makes me really happy. So much so that I looked into buying a system just to play it. But a few hundred dollars doesn't seem like a solid investment for one game when there's so much else I need it for.   A few months ago my nephew got an entire system upgrade. My dad bought it. The entire thing. With every last accessory. So I thought, maybe he might do that for me, too, if I asked. My nephew told me everything I needed and I set up a wishlist for my birthday. My dad came to visit and he brought presents. All the accessories, yay! But no gaming system to use them with. Disappointing. But Christmas isn't all that far off. A few weeks ago I was talking to my sibling and mentioned the whole birthday thing with the accessories. He said ask him for Christmas. I was really hesitant. If he didn't do it for my birthday I didn't have high hopes for Christmas. But if I don't ask I'll never know. It's still on the wishlist, I sent a text asking Santa to please get it. No response.  Its not about the gaming system. I would never have asked for it, I know it's expensive. It's about worth. Am I worth enough to spend the money to buy it? The nephew is. Am I? He has the money. You probably already know how this ends.  No. He didn't get it for me. I'm not worth it to my father. I am only worth the accessories.  I guess eventually I'll have to buy it since I have everything else and try not to think about the little value I hold for the man I try so hard to please. This is why I try not to ask him for anything. I don't know why I was hopeful. I know better. 

I ran over a headlight. Not a bulb, no that would be too easy. I ran over a whole headlight kit. Set. Contraption. Whatever that entire piece is called. I ran it over. But not with a wheel, oh no, that would have been too easy. It got lodged under my car. I had to pull over and get on the ground in a dress and push and pull this thing to get it loose. Yep. I think my car is okay? It didn't blow up.  You know how things happen in threes, right? The two hour tour I took the other night was one. This was two. I didn't have long to wait for three. About an hour later I drove to not one, but two wrong pizza places to pick up my order. That's right, ladies and gentlemen. I have lost my mind. In trying not to jinx myself I won't mention this being over or what else could possibly go wrong because I still have two whole days to this week and I need to make it through without calling a mechanic. And I still have to try to fix the kitchen fan, did I tell you that one? A balloon wrapped around it and the whole thing is dead. The lights, the fan, an outlet on that side of the kitchen. I know, I checked the circuit breaker. That's not it. Life is hurling adulting fast balls at me one after the other and I'm trying not to strike out. I'd settle for a walk as long as it isn't because my car stopped working because I ran over a fucking headlight. 

Doms always ask me about my libido, which, honestly, has hardly changed in decades. I've always been quick to arouse, easy to orgasm, always wet, outright sensual, and very sex positive. No, I'm not bragging, and I certainly realize I am one *very* lucky girl to be like this sexually, with nary a bump in my sexual lifetime roadmap. I'm so thankful for that!  But the rub is, no pun intended, that I have to have a connection with my lover. The longing honest erotic sexy loving trustworthy dominant to his cherished sub dynamic type of connection. I don't perform, I can't get it up (so to speak) without engagement, I belong, I attach, I become, I subsume with my guy with everything that makes us sexual beings, and of course that includes emotional, mental, and physical.  Once I feel that connection, and know from my head to toes that it is both strong and reverential, my sexuality becomes like a well tended plant, soon to flower, over and over, again and again, each time beautiful and unique. Oh, yeah, and hot af too!

Things I listen to when I'm alone  Black Lab - This Night LP - Muddy Waters Bishop Briggs - Like a River edIT - Ants Plastic Bertrand - Tout Petit La Planete Dead Can Dance - The Host of Seraphim Trance Mix Helium Vola - Omnis Mundi Creatura Switchblade Symphony - Clown Collide - White Rabbit Nine Inch Nails - Closer Stabbing Westward - Inside You VNV Nation - Illusion Assemblage 23 - Damaged Marilyn Manson - Sweet Dreams  Depeche Mode - Stripped K's Choise - Virgin State of Mind VNV Nation - Beloved Afro Celt Sound System - Release Me Jilala I - Nocturnal Ritual · Moroccan Spirit Reinhardt Buhr - almost anything he does works Raphael - Healing Dance

We get email from people often enough that I'm going to clarify something. This does not apply to every Dom/Domme on CS, but something to consider before emailing a Dom or Domme. We understand if you wish to address us by a title. But before you use one that might get you in trouble with who you are speaking to, ASK for their desired form of address. This seems obvious when you consider all who wish to be addressed by their desired gender but missed when addressing a Dominant. MissRhyme prefers to be addressed as Miss or MissD. Not Goddess or Mistress. She does not like (understandably) the connotations of those terms. I prefer to be addressed as Sir or Master depending on the preferred service of the submissive. Not Daddy, for the same reason. ViperXTC and MissRhyme  

Where do pirates get their hooks? A second hand store.    Thank you for taking the time to read my profile. I’m looking for someone who naturally has a happy personality and only wants to make others around them happy also. She needs to be drug and tobacco free with only an occasional drink.  What do you call cheese that’s not yours?  Nacho cheese.    I would like to find that type of feeling like when we were in high school and we have that super crush on each other. I do everything to avoid conflict. I don’t argue or fight, if you want a masochist I’m not for you. Trust and respectful communication are important. I am not a social bug so my friend circle is small.  I have 2 kittens but love most pets. I’m not looking for perfection I’m looking for happiness and someone who has the suction of a shop vac. 

Wow! Got a lot of postive feedback from my last journal entry.  So here's a follow-up with more stuff about me... Here are some of the questions I have gotten: Before we get started, as directed by my dom, I am required to tell you that as I write this, I, subMeghan, am completely naked, except for my dog collar...   Do I have a job?  Yes, I have a regular 8 to 5 job.  Boring stuff.  Basically it's data entry kinda job.  Not going to say to much more about that.  There are no sexy stories to tell here... Have I ever been raped?  Yes, but I don't think I'm going to talk about this... How did I get into this "lifestyle"?  I suspect that I've always had a desire to be dominated in some way.  (see my previous journal entries about my fantasies.)  However, I'm going to have to say that one of my early boyfriends was the one who officially got me into bondage.  Prior to him, everything was just in my head.  He was the first person to tie me up during sex... Do I live in a cage/dungeon? No, I live in a normal house.  We kinda use our garage as a makeshift "dungeon".  (Not really a dungeon, more of a playroom).  Nothing very wild, just a few eyebolts in one of the overhead beams for bondage purposes... Am I a whore/prostitute? No, I am not.  That said, in my "wild" high school days, I did kinda trade sex for help on some homework assignments.  It was with a fellow student and we sorta dated for awhile.  But mostly it was a relationship of convenience.  My reputation in high school was way worse than my actual life... Well that's all for now.  I hope you all have a great weekend.  I look forward to hearing from you.  Until next time, this is subMeghan signing off.

NEW CRUSH ALERT!!!! Michele Morrone from the 365 days movies   I'm cheating on my Winter Soldier   LOL

A note for those who choose to message me:   I’m not interested in sexual résumés or exhaustive lists of past experiences as an opening introduction. Depth, discernment, restraint, and self-ownership matter to me far more than explicit history.   I pay attention to how someone lives their everyday life — work ethic, accountability, emotional intelligence, time management, and their ability to carry responsibility. Submission, as I define it, comes from stability, conscious choice, and integrity — not self-erasure, obligation, or performance.   If you are currently uncollared and reaching out, this is the appropriate time to show who you are now: how you manage your work life, how you contribute within a household or structured environment, how you balance ambition with discipline, and how you envision your future. I am interested in alignment, not nostalgia.   It’s also worth stating plainly: as we age, bodies change. That is reality, not failure. Physical limitations or changes — including erectile issues — are not disqualifiers to me. What matters is confidence, honesty, self-awareness, and the ability to live fully in the present rather than clinging to a past version of yourself.  

 SaltLifeFemDom