Hello my fellow kinksters.   I am so glad that this site brought back the ability to add new journal entries.   Today's rant boys and girls is...   Does no one want to be an exceptional submissive or slave anymore?   All I get are young gamers who want to escape their pathetic life that they created and live in a basement somewhere. WTF!   Or old guys who were cross dressing back in the day that now list themselves as " Trans" because they think it's cool to do that now.   News flash..just because your fat ass found a dress to squeeze into doesn't make you automatically a Trans.   Being Trans is way more than that and the Trans slaves slaves that I have had and Trans friends I have would tell you the same thing.   It seems like everyone in the lifestyle only wants to have casual play and sex.   They want fantasy instead of the reality and hard work that this lifestyle requires to have a long lasting relationship.   Ok, old man lecture over.   Well for now anyways!

Bridget Choses Enslavement   Bridget’s emotions were running wild.  The ride up to Master’s gave her ample time to reflect on this special occasion.  Bridget was to be enslaved today.  Master had often told her that all women secretly wanted to be possessed and owned by a dominant master.  Collared.  Be an enslaved slut.  Bridget had embraced her inner slave and wanted the delicious certainty of being a strong Master’s owned property.  What a glorious feeling to have no need to carry on with the soul killing charade of denying her sexuality, her submission, her needs and desires. Bridget was so sure.  She couldn’t wait for their special ritual.  The ritual was ordered by her Master but she had made adjustments and additions that had delighted Master.  She knew Master treasured her and all of her. He often remarked on her intelligence and how it drove her kink and also drove his passion to be her owner.  Master always said women with a desire for the collar, for enslavement were usually the very intelligent ones.   Before she left home Bridget paid attention in the shower.  Her shaving was meticulous. Her legs, arms, and pussy were smooth as possible. She thrilled at the thought of the way Master would cup her smooth, oiled pussy and run his hand back and forth as she squirmed and moaned. She knew Master loved to lick and kiss her clit.  He also like to use his Hitachi and a soft makeup brush on her.  He’d alternate the vibrator and brush on her clit.  Sometimes he’d just stop and listen to her breathing.  Bridget loved it when he chained her wrists and ankles in his bed and made her come over and over until she screamed.  He’d gag and blindfold her and make her come some more. Master had learned early in their play to put a towel under her.  The wet spot was something to see. Bridget’s enslavement ritual outfit was all white and had been her idea.  Master had suggested adding long white gloves and she agreed with relish.  Once out of the shower, at Master’s direction, she installed two Ben Wa balls in her pussy.  They went in nicely.  When she walked around she could feel them as she moved.  She wondered if walking in heels would accentuate the sensation.  Oh well, she’d find out soon.  Bridget loved Master’s toy collection.  He had a veritable fleet of vibrators including a very useful remote controlled beauty.  Master said he was shopping for an internet controlled vibrator for some long distance fun.  He also had a selection of nipple clamps, some fun and some she feared.  There was a lot more and she was sure the list was growing After carefully pulling on her white stockings and attaching them to her sexy garter she slipped on her skimpy white panties.  A curvy white push up bra completed her underwear.  She had a nice white blouse with a plunging neckline that accentuated her cleavage. Her brief white skirt would expose her slim legs and white stockings.  Finally she slipped on her white high heels with thosecute sexy little ankle straps.  Naturally she added accessories like a string of pearls and a bright red lipstick.  She decided she’d add her fragrance and put on the white gloves when she arrived at Masters. The miles rolled by.  Her heart sang.  She had made her decision.  It felt so right.  All the things she wanted to experience would be hers in a safe and protected place.  Master would help to explore all the dark kinky places she dreamed about.   The highway intersection appeared on her GPS. She had to turn north.   It was time to call Master.  She heard the phone ring.  Her emotions ping ponged.  Master answered with a pleased voice.  She was close.  He could almost sense her.  They both reveled in the joy of anticipation.     Master remarked that he was looking forward to draping her with his new 1/8” stainless steel chain.  Perhaps chaining her breasts with a nice halter.  When he mentioned that he’d like to chain her in Sirik Bridget’s was incredibly turned on.  The thought of the chain running from her collar to the chained wrist manacles and finally ending on the ankle manacles.  Sirik chain bondage allowed movement but served to remind her that she was owned, protected property.  Master loved everything Gorean and spent a lot of time finding ways to practically adapt the mores of Gor to earth.  A significant Gorean notion is that bondage enhances a woman’s beauty.  Bridget agreed but also concluded bondage made her horny as hell. The rural setting, the trees, the quiet appealed to her.  Here’s the driveway.  Turning right and pulling up the long driveway she found herself next to Master’s car and she knew, the beginning of her life changing event was close at hand.  She put her car in park and applied the parkingbreak.  She felt that she also applied a break on her normal, vanilla life.  She would enter the BDSM Sea.  Enter it as one of the more exotic and nuanced denizens.  She would be a slave girl, specifically a Kajira, a Gorean slave.  Bridget and Master had discussed many aspects of enslavement, slave protocols, sexual ownership, and what they each wanted.  She agreed with Master that after all, it was at its heart, an exotic adult game.  They both knew few could play the game, few could accept their role, and few could adhere to the rules and enjoy them with intense satisfaction.  Bridget loved her role and while their private play was so satisfying, she looked forward to their forays into various forms of public play.  Public Play involved exposing part of her BDSM life to the vanilla world.  Bridget always found it surprising.  She couldn’t believe the naughty sense of excitement she felt when she was exposed.  Was it humiliation, she wasn’t sure but it was very kinky indeed. She applied the bright red lipstick.  She loved the color and loved that her Master had told her he loved bright paint on her lips.  He said she was so attractive and luscious and he wanted her lips prominently displayed for him.  Next her fragrance, chosen because it was both understated and exotic.  At last she pulled on the long white gloves that came up to her elbows. Bridget and Master had discussed how she’d wear the long white gloves and he’d hogtie her and use his ball gag.  The picture in her mind of the helpless position always made her wet and horny.  Master had done this before.  Usually he rubbed a rabbit fur all over her body before he pulled her hair and squeezed her tit while he told her how he felt, what he wanted, and what he’d do with her next. As she turned toward the house she found the garage door open and as she had been instructed, she entered the garage and went to the back door leading into Master’s Rec room.  The lighting was subdued but she saw two large shapes draped in thin cloth.  She knew these were their BDSM toys.  Master had built a large cage for her amusement and a sturdy St Andrews cross that would fulfill her desire to be suspended and held helpless. Master had promised to cuff and chain her to the cross.  She knew she’d be naked and looked forward to the way master slipped a gag into her mouth before he applied something to her ass. Usually he forced a silicone bit gag into her mouth before he used his snake whip on her.  She could bite down on the bit and scream at the same time for the serious relief she craved.  Master had assured her she’d receive a serious whipping and perhaps caning that would leave some minor marks.  She wanted the marks.  She wanted to feel his touch afterward.  She wanted all of the things that ownership demanded. She knew Master had plans for an interesting combination Stocks and Spanking Bench.  Bridget had told Master she’d love to be placed in stocks and have her ass molested, pinched, bit, and butt plugged. She wondered if he’d make good on his promise to administer an enema while in the stocks.  Master had a lot of toys and equipment.  He had showed her the enema paraphernalia and it included an interesting flow meter that Master said was important to ensure reasonable flow and comfort.    Climbing the stairs she heard Master’s voice and it made her heart skip a beat.  She loved the way he spoke to her.  He didn’t speak at her rather he spoke with her, sharing his thoughts and sometimes emotions.  Master was sitting in a large black leather chair.  He was wearing his black suit with a black mandarin shirt and a nice red pocket square.  He leaned forward and motioned for her to come up.  He wondered about her trip and if the Ben Wa balls were still in place and how she liked them.  She told him about her journey and, yes, the Ben Wa twins were still in place and had directed her attention at the oddest of times, like stepping on the brakes. He asked her if she was ready, if she wanted to go through with their plans.  Did she really want all the things they had planned for, had discussed.  She knew what he was asking, giving her a graceful out.  Her mind was made up but his trust and care made her even more convinced that she wanted enslavement, wanted slavery, wanted to be an owned woman, Master’s property.  All of their discussions had led to this decision.  They both saw a Master/slave relationship as the purest and incidentally most fun form of a BDSM power exchange.  Both of their roles had been defined in term that made sense to both Bridget answered him by unbuckling her shoe clasps and removing her heels.  Pulling the ribbon from her hair she let it fall loose about her shoulders.  Bridget smiled at her Master and began removing all her clothing.  Finally she stood before her Master totally naked.  Master seemed very pleased. He rose and ran his fingers gently all over Bridget.  Master believed that a Gorean Master took great pride in his Kajira, his slave and should be familiar with every inch of her. Bridget knew that her actually collaring demanded that she be naked. She knelt gracefully before him, raised her arms over her head and crossed her wrists.  Bridget had assumed the Kolar or collar position of a Kajira, a Gorean slave.  She knew the message she was sending was that she was ready to be bound and collared.  Naturally she looked down and waited for Master.  The decision was not only made but by showing her acceptance of their planned bond to her Master she knew it was done.  How happy, how fulfilled.  She almost wanted to cry the emotions were so strong. Her life as a Kajira, a Gorean slave was about to begin.  See accepted that she must always be pleasing and offer perfect obedience. Master formally asked her why she was before him and what were her deepest desires for enslavement.  She continued to look down and at first her voice was a whisper but as she gained confidence she became secure and spoke with a clear steady voice.  She asked to be enslaved.  She pledged to serve Master in all ways.  She would be pleasing at all times with perfect obedience.  She would be the owned possession of Master, subject to his commands, dressing as he directed.  She spoke the words of enslavement, “bind me master”. She spoke the timeless pledge saying she wished to be enslaved and then crossing her wrists in front of her asked that Master bind her.  She felt the ceremonial tying of her wrists with the traditional Gorean yellow bindings.  Master then said he would complete the ceremony, their enslavement ritual, by collaring her.  She felt the collar begin to encircle her throat.  She gasped as he pulled her hair back so he could buckle the collar.  Her formal slave collar was polished metal and had a screw driven locking mechanism.  It would be difficult or next to impossible to remove, not that Bridget would ever think about removing the symbol that encircled her throat.  Master completed fastening her collar.  He took her chin in his hand and remarked on her beauty and suitability to be his Kajira. Master removed the bindings from her wrists and ordered her to stand and had her turn around slowly to display herself. She looked at herself and saw the beautiful collar.  All she could say was “La Kajira, La Kajira”, Gorean for I am a slave. Bridget now understood in a most intimate way that her master treasured her and wanted to enjoy his treasure.  Master had two more things to complete the ritual and the first had Bridget very nervous.  Bridget knew she was to be branded.  Thankfully the branding didn’t call for a real white hot branding iron.  Bridget received a henna dye print representation of the Gorean Kef, a very delicate elaborately beautiful “K”, leaving a sharp red image high on her left thigh.  Next Master spoke her new slave name. When Bridget and Master were together in their new roles, she would be “Sefa”.  Master explained that her new slave name was pronounced SEHF-ah and meant pleasure.  He said she was named that way to remind her how she must always be his pleasure slave.  She didn’t think that would ever be a problem. It was done. Bridget had been collared, branded, and named.   Master said he accepted her as his Kajira.  Master directed her to put on her garter, stockings, panties, and heels.  He snapped a leash onto her collar ring and said “bracelets”.  Bridget immediately put her wrists behind her back, slightly bowed her head, and turned around to receive Master’s manacles. Using the leash and her bound wrists he moved her forward.  Master led her around a bit and then out around the deck. Master often told her that bondage made a woman more beautiful and that served to make her move in a sensuous, elegant manner.  Bridget agreed and could think of nothing better than to be on her knees with her Master’s cock in her mouth. He took her over to a chair by the deck table.  He motioned for her to kneel.  He unclipped the leash and attached a short piece of chain to her collar.  The chain was connected to a d-ring embedded in one of the large deck posts.  Bridget was chained to a post with her wrists bound.  Never before had she felt so at peace.  She was owned.  She had been confined on her Master’s deck.  She felt the chain on her chest.  Bridget’s excitement was mixed with embarrassment and humiliation.  She was on her knees dressed like a tarty slut, out in the open for all the world to see.  She realized that Master was exhibiting her as his prize possession.  Of course she thought, it’s highly unlikely we’ll be disturbed.  We’re out in the woods on a secluded property with foliage all around.  Master laughed and said UPS or FEDEX might show up. Bridget’s life as a slave had begun.  She wished and waited for what was next.  Master said she was to be caged in his slave pen after they had discussed their enslavement ritual.  Master took a plate of fruit and picked up a small piece of melon.  He held it out for her to nibble. She daintily nibbled the fruit.  She was being fed by Master’s hand.  She felt a deep bond and happiness.  Next Master poured some of his cool drink into a small bowel.  He placed it before her and motioned for her to drink.  He was watering his slave, caring for his prize possession.  She knelt before the bowel and lapped at the drink. She felt so humiliated to be made to drink in this fashion but it also was so deliciously kinky.   Her journey had begun.  Life would never be the same.  A calmness, a fullness, a richness had descended on her soul.  Master caressed her cheek and breasts and then checked the manacles.  He also adjusted her collar.  Bridget knew master would always make sure she looked her best.  She was his prize possession. Master leaned back and took a small velvet sack from the side table.  “Nadu” Master commanded and Bridget went into the slave position that had her kneeling with her wrists behind her back. Bridget was fascinated  She knelt with her thighs spread wide, back arched, wrists crossed behind her back.  Master produced a bright red ball gag and told her to open her mouth. Bridget felt the ball pressed tightly into her mouth as Master firmly buckled the gag in place.  She found her hands bound behind her back, and the ball gag reduced her to small whimpers to communicate.  She knew she was vulnerable and totally in the control of her master.  It was delicious.  It made her wet just to think of all the things he would do with her.  The bracelets were gleaming metal and had a short length of chain between them so they were relatively comfortable. Master helped Bridget to stand.  He pulled her panties down to her ankles and helped her bend over. He guided her to lay across his lap and began to stroke and kneed her ass cheeks.  Master remarked that she had a pleasingly plump ass that just begged to be spanked.  Bridget felt her Master applying some kind of oil on her ass cheeks.  She wiggled across his lap into a more comfortable position. It made her feel exposed, controlled, at her Master’s mercy.  Bridget couldn’t believe how excited she felt, how she wanted more, more attention, more control. Master told Bridget that he wanted to assert his ownership, make sure she knew she was his property.  Bridget whimpered her assent. She wanted to be his,begged her master to have her, to make her his own, anyway he wanted.  Just do it now. Master began a slow rhythmic paddling of Bridget’s ass.  Slowly at first but soon faster and harder.  Bridget moaned and gasped. Master paused and asked Bridget if she was his, his property. Bridget thought “yes, yes, yes, have me, have all of me.  I am your Kajira and want to be nothing else”.  Master held up one finger which was the signal for silence Bridget was surprised that Master had shut her up, to be quiet.  She understood that he wanted to be in control.  He told her he felt so completed by their rituals.   Master loved the idea that they had built their own kinky world and Bridget loved the way he ruled it. He could silence her with a command or perhaps a gag.  She loved the delicious excitement when he placed a nice red silicone ball gag in her mouth.  Naturally Master could silence her by imposing speech restrictions and she always complied but the ball gag was so hot. Master reached behind her to the small table by his large leather chair.  Bridget felt his movement and turned her head.  “Oh my” she thought as Master’s hand held the red ball gag, a shiny bright metal butt plug, and a tube of lubrication.  Her heart beat faster as she realized she was in for another anal training session.  

In a galaxy far, far away, Where aliens come out to play, They landed on our planet green, The funniest beings ever seen!   Their heads were shaped like flying saucers, With eyes as big as water courses, Their skin, a shade of vibrant blue, Looking like they just stepped out of a zoo!   They had antennas on their heads, Glowing neon in bright shades of red, Their language was a mix of beeps and whirs, Making us laugh, and our ears go berserk!   They danced in a style quite bizarre, Wiggling their bodies in an alien spa, Their moves were funky and oh so wild, Doing the moonwalk with an extra-terrestrial style!   They tried to imitate our human ways, Wearing clothes in mismatched craze, But their fashion sense was out of this world, With belts made of cheese, and hats, unfurled!   Oh, those aliens, they were quite a sight, Bringing laughter and joy, day and night, They taught us to embrace the strange, And how to giggle, even in the grimmest of days.   So remember, when you think of space, And those quirky creatures you may chase, Aliens are friends, just a little bizarre, Our cosmic pals, from a distant star!

Well the fuckery is working like it should. I am beyond exhausted now. My physical body is shutting down hard. Rheumatoid arthritis is the new possible diagnosis. The other options are MRSA (which I have ) and /or osteomyelitis. So my options are crappy so time to rest and heal. I really appreciate all the help from everyone out there I wish people would read my journals before they message me.   time to rest and heal .   

  I am curious. I asked this question of several submissive men who responded to my ad; do you have a kinky resume?  This is exactly like a normal resume but instead details your kinky experience. I was told no; they did not have one.  Because my group is D/s oriented, we took on an Owner's Manual and Kinky Resume for our group.  Wow, the responses and excitement were awesome. As a group, we decided the work put into both of these items would help either side of the sash get to know their partners on a deeper level, and if triggers were set off, we each could handle them better.  This ramped up negotiations to a new level.  As one of the co-moderators for the event said, every car we own comes with an owner's manual, so why not one for us, like a car, we have moments when our "lights come on," or the shit hits the fan.  This is something I want to see. Everyone claims experience, but what classes are they taking to be good at XYZ?  What events do they attend, and so on.  What do you think? 

Secret Room "They met, irregularly, at the secret room and at his apartment in the Haight. She had the feet of a ballerina and the temperament of a harpsichord, and she possessed a certain willingness to be cold." -Lindsay Hill, Sea of Hooks    

== Results from bdsmtest.org ==94% Submissive91% Rope bunny90% Voyeur71% Exhibitionist70% Primal (Prey)66% Experimentalist 60% Non-monogamist58% Slave44% Masochist 43% Boy/Girl40% Brat 37% Switch36% Vanilla30% Pet17% Ageplayer 16% Degradee

Be local, because I want to touch you I get that there’s a desire for online play, and that a lot of people are into it. That’s fine. People want what they want, and there’s nothing wrong with that: it’s how they go about getting it that’s the issue. I specifically request that my potential suitors be local because I’m not interested in online relationships. I want to meet you, get coffee or something, go for a walk, see your expressions while I hear your voice, evaluate your demeanor, feel if there’s any spark between us. If that spark exists, I want to touch you. I can’t do that online. Appreciation from afar is okay - I suppose, but unless you’re local or at least have already booked a visit to Seattle, I’m not interested. Visiting the Seattle for business or pleasure? Great. Hinting that it might happen if I give you enough online attention first? Nope. There are people here who are looking for online relationships. Feel free to talk to them, as they’re who you’re looking for. If that’s what you’re interested in, you’re not looking for me.

Do you like that?/ I keep his throat in my pocket/ He tries to bite back/ I'm sleeping deep in his lungs/ He wants to deny that/ He's on the edge of his seat/ And he's trying not to break, but I give it 'bout a week/ I'm made of linen and salt, my blood is made up of feathers/ He runs on language and laughter, he's made of leather and pepper/ Our limbs walk over to each other, the bodies are shoving/ And I grab him by the tie and, oh god,I think he's blushing/ And the tactics, accents, rip my seam/ He's a hopeless, focused, fucked up dream/ And he's trying not to crawl, 'cause he won't say he needed me/ And he's trying not to sleep, 'cause all he does is dream of me/ His family's scared of me 'cause the concept of sex is stronger than the concept of god/ And when he's missing on Sunday, they know who's at fault/ And I'll return him home, sick with a fever/ 'Cause his still on the ground, on his knees, in a theatre/ 'Cause I'm the backyard heathen/ The girl he's dreamin'/ I'll bend him over backwards, give him something to believe in/ No end, no completion/ He says stop teasing/ We'll play the game, both go insane, and then we'll call it even/ 'Cause his chest is heaving/ His knees got weakened/ All strong and rough and tough, but I ruined that in an evening/ I sunk my teeth in/ And by next weekend/ You're admitting I'm the only god that you'll ever believe in/

  Why Most Online Relationships Fail After Exchanging a Few Emails In today's society, online relationships have become increasingly common. Whether it's through dating apps, social media, or online forums, people are connecting with others in ways that were not possible just a few decades ago. However, despite the convenience and accessibility of online communication, many of these relationships fail after only a few email exchanges. In this essay, I will explore some of the reasons why this is the case.  One of the primary reasons why online relationships fail after only a few emails is the lack of genuine connection that often accompanies online communication. Unlike in-person interactions, which can allow people to connect on a deeper level, online communication can be superficial and lacking in emotional depth. As a result, people may quickly lose interest in each other and move on to other options.  Another factor that contributes to the failure of online relationships is misaligned expectations. People may have different goals for the relationship, such as casual dating versus serious commitment. If these expectations are not communicated clearly, misunderstandings can arise, leading to conflict and ultimately relationship failure.  Catfishing and deception are also common reasons why online relationships fail. Catfishing, or the practice of pretending to be someone else online, can lead to a lack of trust and ultimately undermine the relationship. Similarly, any kind of deception, whether it's lying about one's age or using outdated photos, can create a sense of distrust that can be difficult to overcome.  The issue of not truly knowing what a person wants out of a relationship is another important factor that can contribute to the failure of online relationships. In some cases, people may enter into online relationships without a clear idea of what they are looking for. This can lead to confusion and uncertainty about the future of the relationship, which can ultimately cause it to fail. Additionally, people's desires and expectations may change over time, leading to a mismatch between what each person wants from the relationship. Without clear communication and a shared understanding of what each person wants, online relationships may struggle to thrive and may ultimately fail.  Finally, the ease of finding alternative options is another reason why online relationships often fail after only a few email exchanges. With so many dating apps and websites available, people have a seemingly endless supply of potential partners to choose from. If they don't feel a strong connection with someone after just a few emails, they may quickly move on to someone else.  In order to increase the chances of success in online relationships, it is important to take steps to build a genuine connection. This may involve taking the time to get to know each other better through online messaging or video chats before meeting in person. Additionally, it is important to be honest and clear about expectations from the outset, in order to avoid misunderstandings that can lead to conflict.  Another important strategy for increasing the chances of success in online relationships is to be mindful of the issue of not knowing what each person wants. Before entering into an online relationship, it can be helpful to take some time to reflect on what you are looking for and what your goals are. This can help ensure that you are on the same page as your potential partner and can avoid confusion and uncertainty down the line. Additionally, it is important to communicate openly and honestly about your desires and expectations throughout the course of the relationship, in order to ensure that you are both on the same page.  All of the factors discussed above can contribute to the failure of online relationships, but it's important to note that they are not unique to online relationships. These same issues can arise in in-person relationships as well, and many of the strategies for building a successful relationship are the same regardless of whether the initial contact was made online or in person. One key strategy for building successful relationships is to prioritize communication. This means being open and honest about your feelings, desires, and expectations, as well as actively listening to your partner and taking their feelings into account. In online relationships, where there is often a lack of in-person interaction, it can be particularly important to prioritize communication in order to build a genuine connection. Another strategy for building successful relationships is to take things slow. While it may be tempting to jump right into a relationship after exchanging a few emails, it's important to take the time to get to know the other person and build a foundation of trust and understanding. This may involve spending more time talking and getting to know each other before meeting in person, or taking a more gradual approach to physical intimacy in order to ensure that both people are comfortable and on the same page. Ultimately, the success of any relationship depends on a variety of factors, including communication, trust, and shared values and goals. While online relationships may face unique challenges, they can be just as successful as in-person relationships when both people are committed to building a genuine connection and working through any obstacles that arise. In conclusion, while online relationships may seem more convenient and accessible than in-person relationships, they often fail after only a few email exchanges due to a lack of genuine connection, misaligned expectations, catfishing and deception, not knowing what each person wants, and the ease of finding alternative options. However, by prioritizing communication, taking things slow, and being honest and clear about expectations, it is possible to increase the chances of success in online relationships. Ultimately, the key to a successful relationship, whether it is formed online or in person, is building a foundation of trust, mutual respect, and genuine connection.

Some vanilla history: I had given up on dating in the lifestyle after the end of a 7-year D/s relationship back in 2022. In 2023, I met My ex bf on a vanilla dating app and he said that he initially thought I was a catfish. He had been messaging with Me "casually" for a few weeks and when it started to feel like it just wasn't going anywhere, I attempted to end communication. Apparently, that piqued his interest and he planned an actual date. When I stepped out of My car, it took him a few minutes to compose himself. He seriously was expecting someone else I guess and didn't know what to do when it wasn't. I was thoroughly entertained by the whole thing and honestly couldn't stop laughing at the situation. I gave him a one arm hug and he was shaking! It was adorable. And of course, over the 18 months or so that we dated, I loved telling his friends that story and how he almost blew it being so nonchalant in the beginning.

Master's WritingsCreating a DynamicThe dynamic I want to create has its foundation in trust, open communication and pure honesty. These pave the way for how we relate to each other, how much of ourselves we will give and let go within the dynamic, and how safe we feel to be owned or to own another. The greater the foundation, the deeper the dynamic, and I seek genuine, tremendous depth.The best dynamics allow both kink and vanilla elements to flourish. Even in a total 24/7 dynamic there are vanilla elements that impact and are necessary to the health of the greater dynamic. To ignore this is to ignore the human you wish to create the dynamic with.Dynamics must be flexible and ever evolving. They are living breathing things when done correctly. They require nurturing, maintenance, and love, just as those who live within them do. As individuals, we all have needs. We evolve. We grow, and so too must dynamics. There must be flexibility to bend to whims of the moment, grow as the tastes and needs of the individuals evolve, and be reborn when people, situations and events take us off track.Finally, dynamics must reflect all participants. I seek a collaborative development of a dynamic where each has an appropriate voice, with opportunity to step outside of roles as needed for essential conversations to ensure none are forgotten as we build and rebuild our dynamic over time.Creating this dynamic has been my dream for longer than I can remember. But no one person can create this on their own. It requires another who feels this need as greatly as I do. 

2/13/23 Hey everyone just wanted to make an update to my profile with this Journal.... My profile pics are from 2017 but I am always willing to send newer ones. Some new developments in my life are: I am no longer owned cause My old daddy moved away, I found out I also like being a sissy baby but if your not into thats okay Its not something I have to do. I also am willing to relocate! So if you are looking for a prissy sissy slut like me msg me. Thanks for reading this, Love Sissy Amber

What do I seek in a submissive? The submissive I seek is between the ages of 18-40. Body type well proportioned. Not model status, but pleasing to the eyes. I'm sorry but I just don't have an attraction to BBW or SSBBW type of women. Ideally I would like to be able to lift my sub up in my arms, or throw her over my shoulder even. Though I am not opposed to women that are thicker than normal if they take care of themselves. A woman that is not completely indecisive and has an idea about what she wants in any manner of her life. Often times it does not matter to me what choices she makes, just as long as she make a choice. She should be masochistic, enjoying spankings, paddlings, floggings, roughness, bites, and bruises on the ass, to name a few things that I enjoy to dish out. These are just things that come to my mind the quickest and are by no means completely set in stone. I am willing to make some exceptions based on the mind and personality of the submissive, that WOW factor if you will. I do not have a desire for long-distance relationships, so any inquiries should be made by a submissive in the same state as me. However distance does not matter if you just want to be friendly and chat me up for fun. Nothing wrong with making new friends.

Creating My household - Chat. Meet. Do. Lifetime position - Primary care attendant for My mother with Mid/late stage Alzheimer's.  Google it.  36 Hour day.  Live it. Under My ownership, mother shall be your charge and responsibility going forward.  Requirements:  Genteel.  Never use harsh words or swear.  Affectionate.  Exceptional grasp of the English language. Knowledgeable and amenable.  Must like dogs.  Short day trips - movies, lunch, thrifting.  Ensuring proper daily exercise.  Naughty nice school boys to the head of the line.   This position works well for someone who likes to be in the home and on hand, actively engaged in domestic duties, preparing meals and calmly engaging mother with leisure activities.  I will be responsible for My mothers personal and grooming needs until such time as a slave is well and thoroughly installed.  Personal services may then be granted.    

Why are humiliations beneficial for me? Humiliations help me develop humility by reminding me that I am not perfect and that I have limitations. Facing them with serenity strengthens my patience and my ability to endure punishments or training calmly. Additionally, it is an opportunity to practice forgiveness towards those who humiliate me and to develop greater compassion towards them. Receiving humiliations helps me let go of my ego and the need for recognition or approval from my Teacher. These experiences, seen as tests or challenges, contribute to my growth and the strengthening of my character when they are overcome. They also prompt deep reflection and self-examination, leading to greater self-awareness and understanding of my own weaknesses and strengths. Accepting humiliations strengthens my dedication and trust in my Teacher, recognizing that everything happens for a reason and has a purpose in her plans.

**Journal Entry for jloveslut:**   I’ve been reflecting a lot on the journey of self-discovery and exploration that led me here, to a place where I can openly embrace my authentic self. My experiences as a switch, and my desire to connect with others who understand the nuances of my gender identity and orientation, have been pivotal in shaping who I am today.   In the realm of BDSM and kink, finding a community where I can express both my dominant and submissive sides has been incredibly empowering. It’s a space where I can explore, learn, and grow without judgment. I’m continually learning about what it means to be part of a community that values consent, respect, and communication above all else. These elements are at the core of the connections I’m seeking, and I appreciate how spaces like this offer that opportunity.   I’m looking forward to meeting others who share similar values and interests. Whether it’s engaging in conversations about lifestyle choices, exploring new dynamics, or just making friends who understand this part of my life, I am excited for the possibilities that lie ahead. Here’s to continuing the journey of exploration, growth, and meaningful connections.   Thank you for reading, and feel free to reach out if any of this resonates with you.   — J

It's odd to me that some men don't understand why there are women on here (and in general) who don't want to do what they want.  Men who contact women dick or fetish first, either visually or through words, and are peeved that the women aren't ready to immediately engage with them the way they expected.  "Hey, lady, if you don't want to do what interests me, why are you even here?!  Since I find you attractive, you have to find me attractive, too!"  How terribly disappointing for them to discover that women have their own interests and come here (and anywhere else) to pursue what they want.  Like, a xxx69MasterChode69xxx or a MrSirDomPencilDick4Lyf are really under the impression that women have been online just waiting for when they would contact them.  There's no other reason a woman would be online.   I know I certainly don't have my own interests and kinks.  Of course not.  I've just been waiting for another pic of an utterly forgettable male member in an endless onslaught of utterly forgettable male members or a lame headless torso, or worse yet, a vanilla guy who thinks a sloppy bj qualifies as "kinky" on a kink site.  I'm interested in pursuing my own kinks with the people who interest me.  I don't care what a guy wants.  I didn't ask about his fetishes.  I don't request pictures, so I'm not trying to see someone's face, body, or dick.  And unless my curiosity has been piqued enough that I'd be open to pursuing anything with a guy, none of those things are relevant to me.  I am here for my reasons, my kinks, my sexual pursuits.  They don't have to be the same as yours.  I am not going to pander to what a guy wants just because he wants it.  

Wow. Looks like this is my first journal entry in almost 9 years. Guess life got busy in that amount of time. The world has changed since then on many levels.  I will save many of you some time. I've read everything I've written on my profile and journal so far. It is all more true re my opinions today as it ever was.  Also, I am what many consider to be an open-minded, arch liberal. How could I not be?  In order to be unapologetically who I am in this lifestyle, a free thinking approach is needed. So it follows that if you are set in your ways, hate the current president, detest liberals, have maga swag, and own any let's go Brandon paraphernalia, save us both some time and move on to the next profile. There are plenty of women who feel like you do. No need to feel I can, or should be, convinced. Could I have convinced you to vote for any democrat much less Hillary Clinton? I didn't think so. I don't want to spend time on this site having political discussions  And since Im looking for serious play partners, I felt it best to leave this note here   Its better this way. More politically conservative males can click to the next profile and I won't have to read so many message. LOL I wish each of you the best. Happy hunting! Roxanna

NEW!!  THE MEDIEVAL DUNGEON - ITALY The Medieval Dungeon is fully equipped with suspended bed, stocks, St Andrew’s Cross and full length spanking bench and bondage table and more. There is plenty of opportunity for play, pleasure and pain! The Medieval Boudoir is also available with two beds should you wish to chill out away from the Dungeon area. There is even plenty of space on the grounds for BDSM outdoor play and camping if it's your thing freedom and privacy guaranteed. The Medieval Dungeon is available to be booked for long decadent weekends or you can tailor your retreat to suit yourself by arrangement from the end of March. BDSM * CFNM * Domination * Flogging * Discipline * Corrective Therapy * Bondage * Spanking * & much more…bondage table so there will plenty of opportunity for play, pleasure and pain! IM HERE TO BOOK YOUR TIME IN THIS BEAUTIFUL RETREAT I shall be inresidence from the 26th March should you wish to visit me.   

She ponders, feeling nthe excitement and possibilities and the diving deeper in the world she craves. She can not help herself... She hits the button. It's been ordered... As her mind starts rolling with different scenarios, the fun.. helpless playful puppy she will be.. As she closes her eyes and drifts to sleep.. She's taken to the day her package arrives, so excited and thrilled for this New adventure. As she open her package, she realizes it will take more than her to but it on. Flustered, she sends him a pic of it.. she can feel he's excited for this play as well, they've only talked about it for years.. and now is the time. She takes it out, lays it out... Excited.. wanting to try it out, her attempts fail.. As she's packing her bag she packs in her suitcase, dressed as ordered wearing a plug, and vibration toy all locked up in her belt.. The key is on its way to him.. the question of what if it gets lost in the mail begins to pop up..How would it feel to be locked up and unable to escape his tortures? The feelings of excitement flow through her, she can stop the help less feeling of being locked up and unable to let herself free... As he has the key.. he holds the power to her pleasure, pain, her denial and her release. As she arrives to his place, she discovers a note on the door.. "Strip and kneel" She anxiously looks around, no neighbors outside, can she do this?? Her hearts beating out of her chest. She wants this... After a couple she takes a deep breath in and begins to follow his instructions, she removed her clothing but the belt and such stay in place. She forces her mind to shut off the thoughts of neighbors seeing, watching... Moments feel like house kneeling at his door... Awaiting. He calls her phone - "good girl" Thank you ,Sir she speaks softly.. What was that girl, speak up.. Her voice raises.. Thank you, Sir Sir- Much better girl Thank you, Sir Now - when the door opens, you know where to go and you will crawl to get to that space, there is to be no speaking. Is that understood, girl? Yes, Sir Moments later- the door opens and her head stays casted down, not sure what she's getting herself into. She arrives in that space, kneels in waiting legs apart, hands behind her back and gaze straight ahead. He brings in her play case.. lays things out before her.. she goes to grab for them, his commanding voice... Did I tell you to move from position, girl No, Sir.. That's right girl.. you are to keep position until I tell you other wise. Yes, Sir Now... Put your penis halter gag on, hood and your tail where they belong, hands behind back once done. He leaves the room, she does what's he's asked and back into waiting position. Her drool beginning to build, her cunt is nice and soaked and her scent is filling the room. Very good girl, speaking nas he enters the room and places her new gear in front of her. She blushes... Both with excitement and nervousness. He looks down at her, his first rule You will not speak.. unless given permission In fact you may only bark..1-bark yes2- barks no3 or more.. my puppy needs special attention Is that understood, Girl? She tries to speak with her mouth full... What was that girl.. she tries again.. All 4's girl, she gets into position, and he beats her ass... Puppies don't talk, do they girl... She's quite for a moment.. whap! Again she cries out .. whap.. Do puppies talk girl... She barks twice.. good girl.. Back on your knees girl. Remember this girl .. your days of control are over, this will become your day to day life.. Are you ready ?? In acceptance.. she barks once Quick learner I see, very good. Now... On your back girl.. He placed a blind fold over her eyes, the world around disappears. She's hears the sound of the straps and the smell of leather, she feels the leather sliding into place, and then the straps tightening in place.. he works her legs and then her arms... Or rather paws. Now girl, up on all 4s.. It takes her a couple of tries, but she gets it.. Very good.. She feels cold metal slipping around her next.. it's her training collar with points poking her neck.. a reminder to be the little obedient bitch is becoming. He walks out of the room.. with one word.. Stay.... To be continued...

Requirements, not Expectations.   Respect My time Match My efforts  Keep your word Always be honest Stay consistent   Show up, be on time (words/actions) I will not work harder than you Your word is the honor you start with Omission is the choice you willingly make Consistency builds trust.   Start out being the best you can be and grow. Think about each of these: how to improve a relationship or blow it up by choosing not to do these things. 

Demons We all have them .Just some are better at hiding them. Or think they are.WE choose what to do with the ones INSIDE us.The ones we see everyday.You can't hide them for long.We learn to deal as we get older and perhaps they go away. O just find a better hiding spot That not just little things make them show there ugly horns.Perhaps Our loved ones help with keeping the triggers away. Who really knows.Till you've tried on the shoes make sure that you can walk in them ESPICALY if there NOT your shoes.The demons in ones head can choke a priest.Med ya say? WHY I say?Groundings oneself can help. Meditation can as well. BUT do the demons ever go away completely?Sure when one is dead and gone maybe.How we deal is what makes US STRONGER.Take my hand and I'll help all I can.Without hurting myself of course .May the goddess and gods guide and help you be at peace within oneself.( By KA) me

Janitor of lunacyIdentify my destinyRevive the living dreamForgive their begging scream I was told last night by a coworker that I remind them of Clementine from Eternal Sunshine of the spotless mind... That was the best compliment ever... Clementine was so misunderstood.

Surviving Dead by Daylight:   In the shadows, I roam, chased by dread, In "Dead by Daylight," where hope hangs by a thread. Heart racing, I evade, my breath but a sigh, Survivor in this twisted game, never ready to die.   Through the fog and the fear, I must find my way, Trapped in this nightmare, where I cannot stray. With every heartbeat, a killer draws near, But I must persevere, conquer my fear.   Pallets crash, windows shatter, as I make my stand, Against the darkness closing in, in this cursed land. Alone or with others, we fight side by side, In this deadly game where survival is our pride.   Generators hum, a beacon of hope in the night, Guiding me towards dawn, towards the light. Though hunted and haunted, I refuse to yield, In "Dead by Daylight," my fate is sealed.   So I'll run, I'll hide, I'll do what I must, To escape this fate, to rise from the dust. A survivor, a warrior, in this never-ending fight, In "Dead by Daylight," I'll cling to the light.

  Anyone interested in sharing ideas, thoughts and experiences on self bondage, good, bad, or unusual.   i have little experience in area but intriguied

I tend towards being an opportunistic slut. I would also love to find an ongoing partner but that is like seeking a needle in a haystack. I really like to fuck. Feeling cocks inside of me feels good. Stranger dicks even better. I say opportunistic because I don't fit into the classic mold too well. I am not a tease. A game men seem to like. I am not an attention whore or classically an exhibitionist. I do not do the hair, makeup, etc...what a waste of time. I am also a tad dense and oblivious. I like assertive men and really you have to be because it will go over my head. I have different interests.  Some blend into each other but others can operate independently. When I am a slut I am not your sub unless I am your sub and you choose to use me as your slut.  Does that make sense?  Men tend to forget that.  They also mistakenly believe that sluts will fuck anyone and exist solely to please them.  That's what whores are for.  Which I am not.  I am in it for MY pleasure.  If I do not reply or opt out it is because I either do not foresee my needs being met OR that I don't share the interests that you desire. Ultimately I'd like to find that needle in a haystack.  One whose drive matches my own and has enough compatible freedom and time for something ongoing.   A dominant needs to recognize I am a slut. I'm not a little or a bimbo or brainless.  In fact I'm quite capable of being a fully functional adult. Lol  I don't need "help".  What I do want is a dominant who likes control and enjoys fulfilling his primal and sometimes twisted desires with a sub who will defer to his whims and needs. So what are my interests?  I would say I have a core set and additional ones that arise with someone I may meet. I like nipple/breast play/torture.  I like being restrained.  I like a swollen pussy and marks.  I like anal.  I have a decent pain tolerance and I do enjoy some types.  I am not what one would call a pain slut.  Pain for me is correlated to pleasure.  I would love to be shared.  Use me wherever and whenever.  I love wearing cum.  Throat fuck me, gag me...you can be pretty brutal.  I am not into cock worship or endless oral.  Youve heard of lactose intolerance?  I have a semen intolarance so I cannot drink it down.  <----100% true.  I cannot change that and the side affects are identical.   I am open to so much more but I am not bi.  No women or couples.  No scat.  Don't even mention eating pussy because no you won't make me like it.   Clearly this is a sexual type relationship.  I am married as ive stated so looking for those who need someone more for their own perverted/kinky fun. Other questions?  Ask.  

The Lesson in the Red Chair T.L. Duncan He showed up trembling. Not from fear—at least, not the kind he admitted—but from the anticipation he’d been drowning in for weeks. Every message he sent dripped with eagerness, with that hungry little please he tried to hide behind politeness. I opened the door before he had a chance to knock twice. “Inside,” I told him. He obeyed instantly, the good ones always do. My living room was dim, lit only by the soft glow of the salt lamp and the single, deliberate spotlight shining down on the red leather chair in the center of the room. That chair wasn’t decorative. That chair was ritual.

 vixenmoon