Vanilla relationships and monogamous relationships are perfectly acceptable.  However, these things are NOT my interest and are not for me.  While this site is a bit limited in orientation, I identify as a dominant sadist.  While I can enjoy sex occasionally, I tend to require kink as an aspect of my relationship.  I am also an ethical non-monogamist, and require that any partner\playmate be accepting of that. Really, I'm looking for a good person who's understanding and reasonable who I can sexually destroy and finish the evening with hot tea and cartoons under a warm blanket.

  Your Negotiation Means Nothing If the Results Were Forged [CW: STI non-disclosure, predatory behavior, legal consequences, community safety] Let me paint you a picture. Someone gets a positive result. Instead of disclosing instead of doing the one thing that consent absolutely requires they go shopping. They find a friend. They swap names on paperwork. They screenshot someone else's results. They walk into your negotiation with fabricated proof and a smile, and everything you agreed to was built on a lie. Your yes was never real. You consented to a fiction. And now you're living with the consequences. This isn't just a community problem. It is a crime. And I want the people doing this to understand exactly what they're walking into because the law in these states doesn't mess around. FLORIDA Under Florida Statute §384.24, you don't even have to transmit anything. Knowingly having an infection, being informed you can transmit it, and sleeping with someone without disclosure is already the crime. Non-disclosure of most STIs is a First Degree Misdemeanor. Non-disclosure of HIV is a Third Degree Felony up to 5 years. A repeat offense escalates to a First Degree Felony. The statute covers gonorrhea, chlamydia, syphilis, herpes, and HIV. Fabricating test results to obtain that consent? That's fraud layered on top of the underlying charge. GEORGIA Under Georgia Code 16-5-60, there are criminal penalties for reckless conduct involving HIV and hepatitis transmission. Prosecutors in Georgia are aggressive about pursuing charges against those who fail to disclose their status to sexual partners. And for anything not specifically named in the statute syphilis, herpes, anything else a person can still face assault charges. TENNESSEE Criminal exposure to HIV in Tennessee is a Class C Felony that is three to fifteen years in prison and up to $10,000 in fines. Tennessee covers HIV, Hepatitis B, and Hepatitis C specifically under criminal exposure law. The burden falls on the defendant to prove disclosure happened, and proving disclosure is notoriously difficult because there is rarely documentation so it often comes down to whose word gets believed in front of a jury. ALABAMA Alabama's communicable disease exposure statute casts a wide net "contact" is broadly undefined, meaning a whole range of behaviors can be criminalized, and neither intent to transmit nor actual transmission is required for prosecution. Alabama has also pursued HIV exposure cases under general criminal law, including attempted murder charges where intent can be established. MISSISSIPPI Mississippi's felony exposure statute covers HIV, Hepatitis B, and Hepatitis C. Exposure without disclosure can result in felony charges. This is not a state where you want to test those limits. SOUTH CAROLINA South Carolina carries explicit criminal exposure statutes covering HIV, Hepatitis B, and Hepatitis C both misdemeanor and felony tiers depending on the circumstances and the infection involved. LOUISIANA Louisiana has been actively expanding its reach. Intentional exposure to incurable STIs without disclosure has been the subject of legislation targeting up to 10 years in prison and $5,000 in fines. Syphilis and herpes both incurable fall squarely in that conversation. And then there's civil court which doesn't need a criminal conviction to destroy you. If a partner knowingly infaspects you, you can file civil battery or negligence claims. Intentional, unconsented, harmful contact raises the damages recovered and can run alongside criminal charges simultaneously. A fabricated test result isn't a defense it's evidence of premeditation. A civil attorney will use it to light you on fire. Now let's talk about the test swapping specifically. Presenting falsified medical documentation to obtain sexual consent is fraud. Full stop. It potentially constitutes identity fraud, forgery, and fraud to obtain consent all separate charges that can stack on top of whatever STI exposure statute applies. You handed someone else's results to your partner. That's a paper trail. That's a witness. That's a case. What this means for all of us in this community We build our entire framework on the quality of the information exchanged during negotiation. One lie poisons the whole structure. Informed consent isn't informed if the information is fake. Ask for documentation. Ask about the lab. Ask about the date. Cross reference the details. If someone treats those questions like an insult if they get hostile, evasive, or suddenly defensive about you wanting to verify what they've handed you that reaction is data. Use it. Protect yourself. Know your rights. And if something has already happened to you talk to someone who can help you understand your options. You have them. Legal References Florida Fla. Stat. 384.24 Unlawful Sexual Intercourse / STI Non-Disclosure Florida Fla. Stat. 384.34 Penalties for STI-related violations Georgia Ga. Code Ann. 16-5-60 Reckless Conduct / HIV & Hepatitis Exposure Tennessee Tenn. Code Ann. 39-13-109 Criminal Exposure to HIV, HBV, HCV (Class C Felony) Alabama Ala. Code 22-11A-21 Communicable Disease Exposure Statute Mississippi Miss. Code Ann. 97-27-14 — Felony Exposure (HIV, HBV, HCV) South Carolina S.C. Code Ann. 44-29-145 — Criminal Sexual Conduct with STI Non-Disclosure Louisiana La. R.S. 14:43.5 — Intentional Exposure to AIDS Virus; pending expansion legislation Civil Liability Negligence & Battery claims available in all 50 states; no criminal conviction required https://www.nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/sexually-transmitted-diseases-stds-lawsuits.html https://www.hivlawandpolicy.org/state-profiles/south-carolina https://www.kevinkuliklaw.com/is-std-transmission-a-criminal-offense-in-florida/ https://www.legalmatch.com/law-library/article/liability-for-transmitting-a-sexually-transmitted-disease.html https://www.criminaldefenselawyer.com/resources/transmitting-std-florida.htm https://www.criminaldefenselawyer.com/resources/transmitting-std-north-carolina.htm  

The only people I judge are judgmental people themselves. OK, and people who've asked me to judge them. But that totally muddies the nice, clean quote. ;) I have kicked around this scene of ours for long enough that I remember when YKINMKBIOK was plain survival. Before the web got into every home, if you knew a few people in your area, who were into kink, you clung to them. It didn't matter that I was into the mental side of things, into D/s, while one of them was into sploshing, another into male masochism and the third was into vinyl. That there were three others who were just as weird as me was AMAZING. The huge growth of the scene, that we worked hard for, has been a huge blessing. But it's also given us so many others, that we can find so easily, it's easy to slip into judging others because, well, we'll have plenty of friends left. Don't like the way they do rope? Let's label them as wrong or dangerous. Squick over diapers? Let's call them freaks and borderline pedophiles. Don't like the way they do heavy mental play? Clearly abusers! And look how much better it makes our insecure selves feel about ourselves that we've managed to tear down others! That's not me. I can't do it. I'm not into Daddy/little. I'm not into diapers. Fifty Shades isn't my BDSM ideal. Mind you, I'm not a huge fan of O, or Gor, either. But I love that others are! I love that you freaks and perverts have  so much passion for the things you love. I think it's amazing, the really strong relationships you build around your interests. I am so deeply, deeply, happy that you can find peace in who you are. Your Kink Is Not My Kink But It's OK. It's more than OK. Not for me, but I love that it works for you and good luck to you!

On having no experience... My preference would be a partner with some level of real life experience. That being said, if you don't have a lot of experience, it's your job to properly educate yourself.  I'm not sure why so many male submissives think it's attractive to approach a FemDom and say, "I have no experience, but am eager to have you teach me and mold me." Personally, I find it lazy and an instant turnoff.  It's the same fantasy-induced fever dream, over and over again. I've spent 18 years in the lifestyle and when I first started out, I spent quite a bit of time learning and honing My skills.  Subs and slaves who want to be taken seriously do the same. There are several excellent books to start with for basic training skills. If you're on FL, I highly suggest following slave underscore mission. he's got ninety or so journal entries and it's a great way for any beginner to find a place to start. Beyond that, there are classes, workshops, snack and learns...seminars; etc.  Bottom line, if you want an experienced and educated FemDom, you're either going to need real life experience or be able to show that you've taken considerable time and effort to learn the basics. Of course, once under consideration to become Mine, I would train you to suit My specific needs. But it's the difference between training runners for a marathon who have only done a 5k vs trying to train people who can barely walk a mile. 

Tonight's top email -  "You know your getting rid of 55 to 60 of potential contacts by restriction in your second paragraph?" Well, first of all  - "you're." A contraction of "you" and "are."  Kinda tells me a lot right there. I wrote back and responded to what I thought he meant. But no. "Dimina its the political restrictions that throw out 55 60 of the potentials in line" Then second, it's not "Dimina" and third, its not the second paragraph. It's the 4th and 5th sentence. Further clarifies the kind of person writing. So I responded to THAT. "If the political restrictions are the problem, then they arent actually potentials. They would be incompatible with me on many deep levels, and compatibility is the most important thing to me. The fact that they might not consider it an incompatibility, and would want to approach anyway, just further illustrates the basic incompatibility. The bottom line is this it doesnt matter what someones kinks are, how much money they make, etc.  If I cant respect them as people, I dont want to be around them in any capacity. If I cant respect them as people, then I ABSOLUTELY dont want to have to spend the kind of time with them that is required for kink, intimacy, or a relationship of any kind. Its not politics. Its a basic test of character, intelligence and humanity. No one on that side of the table is going to meet my requirements in those areas. Or, to put it in the simplest terms if someone is in the same crowd as the  self- proclaimed Nazis and isnt leaving, I dont want to know them." Let me try to explain something here - If "liberal politics" is a hard limit, maybe don't contact people for whom fascism, libertarianism, and Drump are hard limits. Seems pretty straightforward to me. I mean, isn't a profile for finding common interests and weeding out incompatibilities? Contacting someone who you KNOW isn't interested in you, and who you know has qualities you aren't interested in, to complain that their hard limits keep you from approaching?  Whining is really unattractive, guys. Then again, maybe he WANTED to be humiliated.  So... merry christmas, random complainy dude?

  Do you have an all consuming foot fetish? If so, you could be the foot slave I am looking for. Duties to include full pedicures, moisturising, massaging and stroking etc. you may also be used as a foot stool should I so desire.  you must be be no further than an hour from me ( East Sussex ) as weekly visits will be required if not more. Shortlisted, you will be given my location and required to meet Me over coffee or wine, depending on my mood. Reply with FOOT SLAVE in the title and garnish me with why you should be considered. One line messages will be deleted. Stand out from the crowd.  M M 

second potenial ending to blend with majority of previous ending   Now exhausted from the day’s events, your precious body quivers, shakes lifelessly, just laying on the faux fur bed, hands still locked together, and your feet still in the spreader bar.  Completely war out from the whole day’s events that enfolded all before your eyes.  Twelve hours of pleasure, pain, excitement, desires being fulfilled, heightened arousals,  your deepest most rooted thoughts brought up to the surface for all to see.  Your path of fulfillment was laid out before Me, your strengths, weaknesses, everything was given to Me.  Now it’s my turn to reward you.   All your bonds have now been released, first your wrists, then followed by each ankle, and then finally the lock that held you to the chain, that of which held you so dearly still.  All that remained was the collar, the collar which now was yours to wear with pride.  This was my give / symbol to give to you, that you may now show the world that you are now loved, cherished, desired, taken, cared for, and belong to me.  All of that said in a simple fashion of a collar.   The reward, for your ever falling body, that is which, is slipping deeper and deeper into submission of sleep.  I place you down, now under the faux blanket; I place you on plush oversized huge pillows at the top of the bed. Silk lined sheets covered with soft rose petals.  A warm fire place glowing in the far corner; the corner that which was kept in the dark, hidden from your eyes the whole time.  (Slave went and started the fire while I was releasing your bonds.)   My, sweet baby; so sore and sexy, all at the same moment.  Looking at you with a new fresh pair of eyes, eyes no longer lusting but has contentment, restful, and happy.  I’m proud of what I have done and now own.   Sweetness I have a question for you, “are you truly happy?  Am I what you thought I would be?  All that you lusted for? Is this what you will forever be able to be?  My own, loved forever?”   As you slowly drift away to that sleepless state.

A recent message asked me to name "one experience thats shaped your journey in the BDSM world", and I thougt of this poem. It is about a scene I monitored in the early summer of 1999. The title is the name of the wonderful, beautiful woman, a friend, mentor, and so much more, to so many people over the years, and the sub in the scene. I miss you, "Mom".  Allena Beautiful golden hillside Lush with fine, silken grasses Trembling as he works his Mastery With every crack like thunder, Another crimson dewdrop appears; Meeting one another, dancing into rivulets, Until her hills and valleys run with ruby wine. Over and over, agony meets ecstacy; Mingling tears with sighs As she shudders with pleasure and pain. I shudder too, as I watch. Start at every strike; Feel each blow as it lands. I imagine I am there beside her; And for a precious moment...We are one. ©Khaos WolfKat 2001  

He settled into the chair as I stood in front of him. He instructed me to turn around a couple times. I tried to suck my gut in and squeeze my butt to lift it and made it look tighter. He noticed and told me that it is what he expected of me when I walk around naked. That my butt should look good at all times. I made a mental note of my position. I had a show roughly worked out in case he didn't provide his own instructions and began to show him my body. With each step he gave me instructions on how I could look hotter. At times he came up and ran his hands over me as I held still. With both hands I grabbed a rope that was dangling from the ceiling and feigned having my hands tied above my head. I bent myself over the bed. He gave me instructions as to how wide to open my ass and when he was happy had me hold still like that as he came over. He jerked his cock for a while and then ran his hands over my body, his fingers playing with my hole. At one point he approached me and kissed me. I held still and let him do it as he pleased, following his lead. I didn't think I'd like but I was surprised at how good it felt.  

before its asked or implied or suggested, no, i do not ignore my basic rules he knows i will not cause trouble or drama and i , do not go behind -MY R./T-bACK,lie to him, or disrespect him or shame my family in any way.    Y'all only get this one  warning and reminder and well, i have a really really  button pushing finger that i do not want to be tempted into taking Last memo i promise.   if ya are responding to me and i click open your mail and the first thing i see is a picture floating out of a close-up of your cock, you can pretty much accept your fate that you are instantly blocked and will not even exist on the same playing field as the others here regardless of their gender or energy level, or role identifier.    so simple unforgettable notice for you... 1 dick pic+1 ignorance of my rules or warning = -alarm bells guard dogs, sharpshooters and everything else turn you into dust to be cleaned up and mixed into the sand never to be heard or seen of again.  ---yes yes i know;...graphic and dramatic.. but pleads innocence since she is unsupervised currently with her other half in bed this fine dark night;I truly do look forward to any and all responses i might have to be honest.. you being there for me today just means the world to me as putting myself out there is terrifying for me in general.   *can not help the impish excitement of how many right now pigging out will even read the whole note and the panic sets in.   just as A team heads off for their camps.. in comes  B team who makes the realization not much got accomplished and something had to have happened...? maybe?. 

The desire to be dominated It's perfectly normal for men and women immersed in BDSM to have specific desires and fantasies, such as the desire to be dominated. The lifestyle encompasses a wide range of activities and dynamics, and it's essential to communicate openly and honestly with your partner(s) to ensure that everyone involved is comfortable and consents to the activities taking place. In the realm of the BDSM lifestyle, communication and consent are paramount. Before engaging in any routine activities, it's crucial to have a conversation with your partner about your desires, boundaries, and limits. Establishing a safe word is also essential to ensure both parties can stop the activities if necessary. Remember that BDSM should always be safe, sane, and consensual. It's essential to prioritize the safety and well-being of all involved parties. If you're new to the lifestyle or have specific questions or concerns, it's a good idea to seek out resources and educational materials, or even consider attending workshops or discussions within the BDSM community. Ultimately, your interests and desires in the lifestyle are personal, and as long as they are consensual and safe, it's a valid aspect of your sexuality. It's essential to find like-minded persons who can share your interests and engage in these activities with respect and understanding. If you have any specific questions or need advice concerning our lifestyle topics or anything else related to your interests, feel free to ask. I'm here to provide information and guidance based on your preferences.

When you decide to approach me for consideration and I trial you, your role & goal is to acquiese to MY lifestyle/desires.    That "previous training" is moot to me. I give subzero fucks about what's easier for you & how you used to do things. If you're just chasing the feeling you had with someone/something else then you're an addict, shifting the ideal from tacitly serving to satisfying your own urges and desires-- hence why you perpetually fuck up this elusive dynamic you long for. That will never be worth my time and/or effort.   It is MY WAY, no fucking 'or' involved... ever.

thesis statement activiated.       for years i've been studying this dynamic on a spiritual, esoteric, comsic, deep level. seeing so many little girls like me of various ages, genders, nationalities, all that. and yet something was always the SAME. the story kept repeating. it feels like being on a conveyor belt. pumped out trying to figure out the answer faster by dissementing us all..mostly the same with slight variables.       and it feels it's the same but different journey for the men who are daddy dominants. and bit more aloof at times for me to track because i'm not a man..but i've been tracking it too.       if curious, all my writings of this are now on reddit...some time i lost some of what i wrote when i gave up on this for a few years in the past. ask for my name if anyone stumbles upon it and wants to see. i'm divining this through spiritual messages, mostly music, sound, visual, sonic, pop culture media magic. a la goofy fellow little girl from harry potter professor treelawny style.       i don't usually want to write stuff down here. i see what people wrote here on collarME..because i was on here in my 20s when it was called that. and i go yeah that won't stick.       but i know this will for me. i cracked the code. and even if i haven't cracked my michael and our long term permanent phyiscal union as of this creation...i'm pretty sure that this will work.       check this out...as i play the song hidden sign by visage longer version is on..for those who are mystical you'll get what's going on.       i've already tested this with 6 other little girl friends from 20s-50s differen races mostly unmarried...we need to get better at this..how are we going to evolve into the new earth with so many of us continually seperated and too chicken shit to ride it out and face our individual storylines of insecurites together without running away at the first uncomfy hiccup.....come on everyone....but one or two married thank god. and they all checked. they all had uncanny things they forgot or didn't piece it together.       so i know i hit into it.       i at this point have probably 10 pages of this and growing.....and i know my breadth on here is already too long enough for most people's capacity. though i'd like to pass this esoteric knowledge on to the community on this true deepth path beyond physicalness, beyond fun, beyond roleplay, beyond a unawkaen sleep approach that's deeply tapped into the mission.       sailor moon and mamaoru aka darrien and serena, usagi and mamoru are this tale as well. ai no message..message of love for the good of the future.       so if anyones ready to dive deep of any gender and isn't being creepy weird or not serious about it hit a girlie up..i'll give you my reddit..and if you ask nice i'll give you the trascripits of this mystical message i unfolded.....with clear instructions on how to navigate these waters and more....but only if you ask nicely.       until then.....let's start with theis.....there are images to attach but collarme won't let me....so....images are on reddit.       i cracked the code for those that have been following my musings..i've been trying to fucking track this energy. the guy converybelt the girl converybelt........the synergy the unique qualities that keep repeating itself over and over and over and all the fucking over again. an endless journey.   i went deep into my professor treelawny divining....the tea leaves were tea leaving..the music was musicing..the channeling was challenging...the messages were messaging. and i was asking other girlies that i've been friends with..i found this out about me..and i know it's not ME it's an original collective thing..this happened to you too right..yes...okay..what about this in your life..shit when i was 5...of course....   WHAT ABOUT FUCKING THE DRAGONS THOUGH. CYBERPUNK 2077 MR. BLUE EYES...........SPACE...alot.   i'm holding off on my book/dissertation on it cause it's too big for now.   but i figured it all out.   what the fuck is the whole daddy dominant and little girl cycle that keeps happening? why are we humans so instinctively same carbon copy with only small minute changes......because in spite of what society says.. the age, the race, the location, the uniqueness..those are all the fucking details. i had a rando tell me one time that they were unique and i was like oh the things i could tell you about yourself and you don't even know me....unique only to a very finite extent.   welll...here it is.   this is the michael sophia code. i thought it was persephone/hades but that doesn't have the space not quite human life is foreign familiar but not familiar etheric/angelic/galactic thing going on. that was the rough draft.   i was looking for an image to finish this...the lesson isn't learned, the message isn't done...   FIRST FUCKING RESULT UNDER ARCHANGEL MICHAEL AND SOFIA   i'm going to still have go to back to the books for this......i'm still in research mode..how deep is this going to go cause damn...i already passed the twilight zone and the multiverse near the end of time.   this one has that trickster energy you can tell.     i have a penchant to the statue era...it was a vibe. it was a moment..it was a era.   it gives chris brown....one of yall for sure..vibes of   "I don't see how you can hate from outside of the club You can't even get in Leggo"     to be continued as i keep doing this doctoral degree on this shit. but damn i had to come to the surface to say i finally figured out the thesis.       case in point...as i finished verification string says ahshua.....found this       "Ahshua is not a widely documented term in mainstream esoteric, spiritual, or cultural traditions, but based on the pattern and sound of the word, it may carry roots in mystical or sacred languages. Here's some exploration based on its phonetic and spiritual associations:       1. **Hebrew/Aramaic Influence**: The term "Ahshua" could potentially echo the sounds of Hebrew words, particularly related to divine or messianic figures. For example, "Yeshua" is the Hebrew name for Jesus, and the similar sound of "Ahshua" might evoke an esoteric or mystical connection to salvation, divine intervention, or sacred naming traditions. In Kabbalistic teachings, names hold significant power and vibration, so it’s possible this name resonates on a mystical level, even if it’s more modern or personal in origin.       2. **Angelic or Channeled Knowledge**: Sometimes names like "Ahshua" emerge in the context of channeling or angelic traditions. If you're connecting with Archangel Michael or higher-dimensional beings, this name could be part of an energy or being that you are tapping into. Certain spiritual figures are only known within smaller or more esoteric groups.   &nb

I'm a loving caring Domme seeking her sub for ltr.   You: available, devoted, educated, professional, well-off, well-rounded, Caucasian, attractive, publicly alpha, privately submissive, faithful, non-sissy, cuckold (non-negotiable). Need cuckoldress to pamper, obey, serve, worship, support, suffer for emotionally and physically. Ideal Situation: long-term relationship leading to marriage in TPE/Cuckold situation where cuckold is subjected to long-term sexual denial and chastity, reduced to slave-husband status in permanent service to me. You have to earn the status of husband before being a slave. I am not a slave master. Me: Petite 5'3" 120 lb sexy curves, African American Dom, the boss, business owner, attractive, caring considerate person but to my cuckold husband, I will keep always wanting more and begging to please me. Must be good looking, in shape and health conscious. I am all 3 of those so you must be too. I'm self employed and the boss. I live in New Jersey and I'm not looking nor will entertain long distance relationships. Must be in the NJ, Philly, or DE .  I'm willing to do some variations of the above in the way of physical appearance.  Although if you're extremely over weight or unhealthy, I'm not interested.  I dedicate a lot of time to keeping myself in shape and eating healthy foods.     I really want a person that I care about who needs to be dominated more than I need someone to treat cruelly just for the sake of being mean.  I prefer you be over 40, mature, health conscious, as I really want someone in great shape but at least be healthy and HWP.  The more successful you are, the more I want to dominate you. When you respond let me know about you, your past experiences or anything that's significant.  Messages with pics will be answered first, if I choose to answer at all.  One liners or "how may I serve you" will be erased.  hotwife, domme, poly, cuckold, cuckoldress, hot wife, domination

Why sub men need to be feminist allies I firmly believe that any submissive man must, obviously, be a feminist. Feminism by definition is the belief that women are human beings with the same rights as any human being. (The idea that feminism is about female supremacy is propaganda created by misogynists to try to argue against women having any rights at all.) That said, submissives routinely insist that women are superior, and FemDom porn is some of the most popular BDSM porn out there. I would hope that to believe that women are superior would require that men first believe that they are equal. One of the biggest complaints I hear from subs is that there just aren't enough Dominant women in the world to go around. There's a very good reason for that. In the book I'm currently writing, I discuss how girls are raised radically different than boys. From our earliest experience, any hint of assertiveness is usually squashed as "bossy" or "aggressive" or "unfeminine" and then later as "bitchy." The terms a "good girl" is defined by are usually submissive, demure words, urging us to be quiet, polite, deferring to the pleasure of adults in general and males specifically. Blanche Black paints a very good picture of this in her Feminism 101 article, and the MetaFilter discussion "Where's My Cut" is literally thousands of women giving examples of how they were crammed into the role of caregiver with strong social, economic and even physical consequences for ing or questioning it. We are programmed from birth to be doormats, and are told we are genetically predisposed to be happy about it. To go from that upbringing to being an assertive adult is a massive undertaking. I know a majority of the women in my life never even realize that they are following roles and rules they never agreed to. It usually takes a huge life event to force that awareness on us, and then years of hard work re-creating our understanding of communication and relationships to learn to stop playing that part and instead to stand up and assert ourselves. To stop allowing others to demand and take and expect, etc, and instead start working toward taking care of ourselves first, demanding equal effort from our partners, being willing to be alone rather than be subjugated. To move into the confidence and self-reliance necessary to dominate ... that's a new world. I'm not talking about becoming a bitch who uses and abuses and negates the feelings and needs of others to get her way. I'm talking about being able to walk away from what doesn't serve us and require a higher level of interaction from anyone who wants to stay in our presence. I'm talking about being unwilling to tolerate poor behavior, from others, or from ourselves. That requires a sea change. A total re-writing of the base code that made us from our first memories. It almost never happens by accident. It almost never comes without great pain and sacrifice. It's almost always worth it. But it's always an uphill battle that never ends, because nearly the entire world we live in is still trying to tell us that we aren't being feminine, or desirable, or kind, if we aren't giving away whatever it whims to want. We are still being told that we'll be alone, that we are bitches or worse, sometimes it brings violence and poverty and suffering, because this world doesn't want women to be assertive, and it doesn't tolerate them being dominant. If you want to have dominant women, you have to start with allowing them equality. Not special privilege. Just the same privilege men have to think what they want, without being told they are failing as females. The same privilege to act for themselves and not just for others. The same choices and freedoms and safetys to exist without being attacked for it. If you want to have dominant women in the world, you have to be a feminist, and moreover, you have to be an ally. Aggressively so, because until feminist men outnumber and overwhelm the rest, you are going to have to counteract the bullshit message the rest are constantly putting out there telling us to SUBMIT! You, submissive male, must be the active agent that makes the safe space for every woman to express her thoughts and feelings and wants and to act on them without recrimination. You will have to stand up to other men, because they don't hear it when we say it. You will have to call out your friends when they catcall or mansplain or talk over a woman or _(insert male domineering behavior here____) to a woman. I'm not saying that every woman you do this for will become a Dominant Woman. I am saying that almost no women can without it, and if nothing else, you can make the first steps in that direction less of a battle for them. Go forth, and create the world that lets us first become people, equal and unencumbered, and Dominant Women will become ever more common, until almost every submissive male that wants one can find one.

"First Encounter" Inner thoughts of this dom. HIM:  "Today I'm about to meet this incredibly sexy submissive ive been coveting for a while. She a cute little thing that would be perfect to join my family. I wonder how quick she will succumb to my will? What and how far will she go to be allowed to orgasm?" These as many other stray and random thought rattled their way around my mind. The excitement mounting as we were about to meet real time after a very long period of online and phone chats as we each revealed ourselves to each other. Developing what we hoped would be a meet that would cause sparks to fly within us as the anticipation had grown that seductive. I meet you at a quiet little bar. There we introduce ourselves for the first time in real life. I feel like I know so much about you after the many weeks we have spent chatting online. You are even more beautiful in person. As I hug you tightly to my body the faint whiff of your perfume entices me. I slowly slide my hands down your back as out tongues dance in our joined mouths. Working down your firm ass I can't help but squeeze your cheeks. I slight moan escapes your lips into my mouth. I disengage our lips and bring my face against your neck. Once again inhaling your perfume and freshly washed hair. As I bring one hand up to your head to hold it in place as I nuzzle your neck my other hand slides up your short dress to make sure you followed my instructions and didn't wear underwear.  I pull your head to the side by your hair exposing your neck. Like Dracula I attack your neck. Nibbling and licking it as I work my way to your naked shoulder. My other hand openly caressing your naked ass for all to see. I am so proud of her. She passingly mentioned to me that she was never into PDA nor was she much for kissing. Yet here we stood locked together mouth to mouth for all the world to see. "If only she had gotten thus kind of affection more often. Would she feel differently?" I think to myself.  She feels the cool breeze against her naked ass as I intentionally expose it. I want to see her reaction to my actions. Will she deny my? If I am to be her sir surely she will comply. She knows if she passes the tasks I will bestow upon her over the next week that she will find shelter within my arms. Secure in the fact that I will help her grow and be there to catch her when she falls. For this she will give me her mind, heart and body but eventually I want to own her soul. The pilgrimage of that honor is my quest.   HER: Feeling you lift my incredibly already short skirt and the breeze on my ass, you feel my whole body grow warm, and see the bright red spreading across my skin, as i move my hand to cover my poor ass and gs every so quietly, in your grip i do my best to turn away from the other people near by knowing i wont get far i still wiggle and whisper a quiet "Sir, theres people looking" all the whole attempting to pull the skirt back down and cover myself.  As she tries to pull back her skirt feeling humiliated and embarrassed I quietly whisper in her ear. It ok baby girl. You are beautiful scars and all. I desire to show you off. Love yourself for me.  You feel my fingers sliding between the cheeks of your ass. Relieved that this action is allowing your skirt to begin covering your nakedness. Suddenly you feel my finger tip dip between your lips that are moist from fear and excitement. The action is quick and efficient. Only lasting a split second yet the feelings it created within you may last much longer. You quickly look around to see if anyone noticed your reaction and what sir is doing to you. There at the bar is a young man. He can't be any older than 22. A grin on his face as he quickly turns away when you look his way as if you wouldn't notice the lust within his eyes. You suddenly feel wanted and desired.  Here your sir wants you and is giving you the attention you've been longing for for so long. And a man who is so young looks at you like a cougar with lust. Willing to pounce on you if he could. All these thoughts are running freely thru your tangled mind. Mixed emotions running ramped like a freed feral cat. Yet your body is betraying you with its actions. You turn suddenly away from me pulling me towards the waiting booth in the darker corner. I see the flushed look in your face. The embarrassment I have caused you. It turns me on making my cock twitch even more. The wetness I felt when dipping my finger in you showed me how your body betrays your mind. Although embarrassed you are turned on. Is it because of my actions or because you were being watched. I glance at the young man who is once again looking. I look him in the eye with alpha male intimidation that has served me well all my life. Something earned taught and released from my primal interior being from the years I spent in special forces while in the military. Something about one who has seen things that show the ugliness of man is like an imprint. Although not visible it is detected in posture. My eyes show a certain sadness but also scream that I am not one to be reckoned with. The young man immediately turns away. He picks up his beer and goes to the other end of the bar. Interpreting the unsaid message given to him by just a glare by a man more than twice his age. That instant momentarily distracts me as I faintly hear something you said but didn't fully acknowledge.  I pull you back to me. Holding you tight against my body once again. I feel your breasts pressed against my chest. Our groins mashed together as if they already know what is to come later. Anxious to get started as my cock strains against the denim of my jeans held prisoner. I whisper once again into your ear. "It's OK baby girl. I want to feel you against me for another moment.  After all these weeks you are now flesh and not just words. I nip your bare shoulder lightly with my teeth.  My tongue then flicks back and forth where my teeth once bit as if to offer a healing moment.  Unneeded tho because of the gentleness of it. Putting the smile on my face that I use for the world, the one that doesn't necessarily reach my eyes but seems to somehow charm everyone that comes in contact with.  Feeling you slide into the booth next to me, I have to concentrate so hard. In a way that I do not tense up, but keep my body relaxed. In the way "he who must not be named" showed me at all times. Afterall, no man wants to cuddle a corpse Katey! Shaking the thought from my head. I relax and let my features fall soft. Warm and welcoming. I risk a glance up from the table where my gaze has previously been focused and catch his eyes. They're peering into mine! Why on earth does it feel like he's looking straight into my soul? No one ever notices this much or pays this much attention. I know I'm cute tonight. Hell, I'm always cute. Enough cleavage showing to capture the attention of everyone in the room that has a penis and even some who don't. Why is he so focused on my eyes?  Shifting nervously but trying so hard to stay relaxed. (No one cuddles a corpse Katey!) I can't help but freeze just a bit as he grabs my hand pulling it to his face. Please don't notice the sweaty palms I chant in my head. He's going to think I'm insane or unable to show love. SHIT! What if he thinks I don't like him?  Pushing the thoughts from my head again drawing my focus back to the moment. I realize he's speaking to me. Not hearing half the words, but his eyes capturing mine again like he seems to have a talent of doing. I see a soft side in there. Someone honestly gentle.  You've seen that before too Katey! Right before the black eye my brat pipes up. Shut up it's different this time try to have faith. I zone back into his words and catch something about being his pet for the night.  About being taught new things. This stirs the curious one, the fun filled one with the will to live inside me. She gets super excited bouncing up and down like a child seeing stars for the first time. Eyes shining bright. She loves to learn new things.  All this flashes across my face before the brat hog ties her and sits her back down in the chair. For once her and I agree. Now is not the time for you to surface we're still treading new waters here. Wondering if he saw the roller coaster of emotions going through my twisted broken mind before my face settles. Back to the factory style smile and shining blue eyes all the men seem to love. I relax into his touch trying to show I'm not a mutant. Afraid I'll come off robotic. The motions coming so natural they seem programmed ( No one cuddles a corpse Katey!)  Hoping this gets past him and smile briefly hearing him say, "Tonight I own you". I reply with a sweet, "Yes Sir! I can't wait." Looking into her eyes as he holds her hand for reassurance he sees inner conflict. A turbulent turmoil of emotions taking flight within. He understands these feelings all too well. Demons that he himself has wrestled with for most of his life. His innocence stripped away from him as a delusional teenager.  His mind flashes back to the day he graduated high school. Signing his life away for the next 4yrs. Gonna be a GI! Government Issued, warrior. Right the wrongs and save the world from evil.  Yeah if only he knew who the enemy really was. How evil is everywhere in so many shapes and forms. A delusioned man child at only 18 who thought he knew it all. Quickly his mind snaps back to her. He lays her hand on his thigh and holds it there. Mere inches from his inflamed cock. Swelling that she has caused. Yes she is cute. Those beautiful braless tits on display. Just as he had instructed her to show off. Her beautiful, wanting to please, features displayed on her face. Her body, in that short dress. This too he had requested. One that could have started wars centuries ago. Her freshly washed hair with a hint of fruity smell.  My God what I want to do to that body! But no not yet! Beautiful women are a dime a dozen. That's not what I am after. I want that inner beauty I know is there hiding in fear in the darkness. Perhaps behind one too many negative experiences.  He looks at her again. Tilts his head to the side and leans in. Plants a soft kiss upon her forehead. "This is to free your mind of evil thoughts.", he tells her. Then leaving her hand on his thigh he takes hold of her head. One hand on either side and draws it to him. He kisses one eye, as her eyes instinctively closed. Perhaps out of fear. Then he kisses the other. "These are to ward off evil visions and nightmares.", he tells her. As he releases her he notices her hand is right where he left it. Is it out of fear he wonders as he glances down. Then he sees her moving her hand. Rubbing his thigh. Almost as if she is giving him a non-verbal thank you. Thanking her lucky stars she's put on her trained face. Her body falling in line with the program. This scene all well to practiced in previous encounters with other men. Her body doesn't trip her up for once. It manages to stay relaxed when he reaches for her hand placing it on his thigh.  He keeps her hand trapped under his a few moments. A feeling she's used to. The pinned down feeling. But this time something is different about it. Maybe it's the soft sweet words coming from a reassuring mouth. Instead of the normal don't move whore she was used to. Maybe its the sweet soft kisses he's laid upon her forehead or eyes. She's never felt something like this in all her years experience with men. She finds it confusing. Yet comforting. Feeling that wonder child inside stir some more before the brat slaps her in the back of the head. This is why you stay locked down. Too eager and not enough caution.  The mix of emotions inside rolling over in her mind cause an automatic reaction. The smile softens on her lips. Eyes closing just a little before she peers up at him through her lashes. His hand has moved but two things occured. One she knows never to move from a spot youve been placed unless you want the belt. Yet, a stranger feeling she's not sure she's felt before. Of not wanting to move hand this time. In fear of feeling to stiff again she lightly brushes her fingertips along his thigh. Not out of habit this time but because maybe part of her actually wanted to.  Squeezing her thighs together she notices how wet she's become. She can't understand it. Pressing them tighter in fear of leaving behind a wet spot. She can't help but think, "Where are the drinks?" His relief at feeling her hand beginning to rub his thigh is a welcome relief. Although part of him wonders. Is this just a programmed response? Is she like the many other women he has spent countless hours with chatting, exchanging photos and erotica only to vanish after the session was over.  Almost as if, they, no different than what would be considered creepy guys. They used him to flirt and arouse until they achieved their level of sexual satisfaction and then disappeared. Leading him on like a cruel joke. No he says. That's why he reminds himself, it's not about the sex.  If not to toy with him then what would a beautiful young woman see in an older man like himself. The look in her eyes as she looks at him gives him strength. He sees so much of himself in her. Scars of hurt, rejection, pain and broken promises of lost love.  Yet here I am today he says almost out loud. Daring to take each step to move forward proud and strong. To never give up and to fight whatever battle comes my way. In whatever shape or form it manifests itself. His strength comes from his confidence. A weaker man would be shy and afraid to take a chance again for fear of once again being used and rejected. Tossed aside like left over scraps. But no not me. I am a WARRIOR! I want to believe that there are still people who can love out there the way I do. It keeps my faith in humanity from being irradicated. All this swims through him as his mind processes it all with the lightning speed of a super computer. Just like his training. Compartmentalize evaluate the situation and act. It has worked for him all his life. The long pause between them like a moment of silence causes some awkwardness between them. Then he feels her rubbing his thigh harder. More confidently as if by her own attrition and not a programmed response or expectational desire. It's as if she can see him go far away and is saying, "I'm here. I want to be here and you're ok". Once again he looks into her eyes and sees something that wasn't there before. A softness. A real glitter almost as if they were smiling at him. Wanting and desiring him. His already hard cock twitches. He feels it touch against her hand from the unexpected reaction she's caused. He feels a wetness against his bare thigh as he realizes he's leaking because of her! Thoughts are interrupted as the waitress finally arrives. He orders a Sprite for himself and looks at her and asks. "What would you like beautiful?" A gentle nibble and a kiss! Her coy way of showing affection is illuminating. Her cute sense of witty humor threw him off guard but breaks a grin on his face. She has the humor in her like I do he thinks.  He turns to her and sees her sitting there hands clasped together on her lap. Legs firmly held tight as if to ward off foreign invaders and protect her real-estate.  He slowly eyes her up and down. Her breasts he notices pushed out as if she is attempting to seduce him with them. Her heavy breathing pushing them in and out each time she takes a breath.  He notices how the dress accents her features and brings out the woman in her. Good choice he thinks to himself glad that he purchased it for her and had it shipped to her. Along with the garters that hold up those incredible stockings he liked so much. As he continues down he sees the cowgirl boots as well. He noticed how well the whole outfit fit her earlier but was too enthralled with other things to notice all the details till now. Even tho they are imprinted in his mind to remember forever. Their first meet and date which if leads to what he hopes and knows she desires may be a long term relationship. He brings his eyes up and looks deep into her eyes now. He made it quite obvious that he was checking her out. He looks at her hoping that checking her out and admiring her has pleased her. Perhaps even aroused her. He leans in and plants a soft and gentle kiss on her neck again. He loves necks and shoulders. Moving to her ear as the waitress returns with their drinks He whispers. "You are sexy as fuck. Even more beautiful in person than all the pictures and videos you sent me can capture. If only you knew how much I desire you right now." The waitress places the drinks in front of them smiling as she overheard his comment. She even noticed his tongue flicker across her ear. "Would you two like anything to eat tonight?" She asks. He looks at her and grins. "On our menu" she chuckles knowing what that grin insinuated. His Katey too giggled at that. Feeling more confident in herself knowing his desire was genuine.  He laughing says. Yes please can you bring us some menus.  You obviously know what I would like as my appetizer and dessert He says to the waitress knowing she has a good sense of humor. The waitress laughs with him. I don't blame you she says. I would probably skip all of that and just have her as the main course myself..... A chuckle from in his heart surfaces itself. It's audible sound to those within earshot turn to look it is that infectious and genuine. He wraps his arm around her neck as she cuddles into him for the first time. Feeling her warmth against him he wraps his arm around her neck holding her closer to him. Enjoying how she feels. He notices and feels her hand upon his thigh. This time voluntarily and with movement of its own.  "She's a firecracker isn't she" he half asks half states to the waitress. The waitress can't help but notice in the position she is in now with her head tucked into him, his arm around her neck asnif claiming ownership that she can see right down her dress. Her beautiful breast in plain sight and her nipples hard from arousal. She sees the woman's hand move to his thigh. The action of her rubbing draws her attention to it. She notices how hard he is and how his cock is running down the inside of his thigh mere millimeters from her hand. She notices what looks to be a damp spit on his jeans. She's is mesmerized by these two as she is hypnotized by their hidden affection and the energy radiating from them. She sees her run her finger along the length of his rigid cock. Slowly methodically with purpose. This little vixen knows exactly what she is doing as she looks up at her, stares into her eyes and grins. His cock continually twitching and pulsing from her actions. His voice draws her back to reality. "Whatever she wants tonight. We are celebrating our union" he says. Then he looks down at her as she lifts her eyes to meet his. A glimmer that sparkles thru his piercing blue eyes looking deep into hers. "What would my darling pet like to eat" he softly asks her. As he waits for her reply he can't help but feel a rush running thru his body. The way she's teasing his cock on her own. She may think that he didn't notice the pixy like smile she gave the waitress who saw her doing it. As he looks down into her eyes to ask her what she would like he too notices the plunging neckline of her dress is allowing anyone above her to see her tits. He sees her nipples standing out exceptionally far and hard from the soft roundness of her breast.  It excites him making him leak once again. He can feel the wet warmth released from the eye of his cock. After asking her what she would like he gently blows down the front of her dress. His breath running down her neck across her brwasr and to her nipples. He swears it looks like they just got bigger from that. He turns to the waitress noticing she saw this too. Her reaction is priceless. Her almost hypnotic state excites him. She TOO wants and desires his little pet nestled softly and safely against him as his strong arm holds her tight. He blinks his eyes several times. The light starting to creep its way into the room is almost blinding. He rubs them trying to get the sleep out of them as he looks around and then checks out the clock. Looking down at his crotch he realizes his cock is still hard. There's even a couple wet spots on his underwear. Clearing his head he slowly gets up to go make coffee. Wow that was one hell of a dream he smiles to himself remembering it.  

Hello.  Hi.  You happened by my profile.  I think I'm just an average woman who happens to not shy away from searching out what she desires.  Am I a sub?  Yes.  Am I a slut?  Yes I am that as well.  I happen to also have a slightly masochistic streak in me.  I am many other things but those are fairly irrelevant within the context of my purposes here.   I am real and sincere about what I seek.  I wonder if that's common?  Oh wait.  It's not that many aren't real or sincere they just seek attention and other things. Not actual experiences in real time.  Some do but many don't.  Which you find in droves both with women and men.  So I typically reply to those who have similar goals in being here. Have I been a sub before?  To be clear sexually I am naturally submissive and yes I've had a couple doms over the years.  A role I treasured because it is so difficult to find the right dom.   The right dom for me craves control.  Not the micro managing kind.  Not old school types with a bunch of rules and routines ahd (shudder) honorifics.  One who recognizes I am a fully capable woman who simply enjoys allowing you to use me to enjoy your own selfish and perverted proclivities. One that seems strangely foreign to men.  That's how it appears at least. My interests or what I will do are so vast.  There are certainly things I won't as well.  Your best approach is to simply share what you desire.  I won't demonize you for your desires.  I just may not always be the right person for them.  Keep in mind if you don't have any or cannot share them you don't need me.  Lol. Also the more basic and common they are to me signal too safe of a reply.   I have to run for now.  I'll add more later.        

You should be very careful throwing around terms like "true Dom/Master/sub/slave" or "real Dom/Master/sub/slave". What is real and true to me isn't necessarily what's real and true to someone else. A lot of times people throw out those terms and what they really mean is "someone who thinks exactly like me" or "someone who practices BDSM just like I do". Other times they mean "you have to agree with everything I say, believe and do, or you're not a 'real' Dom/sub/Master/slave". As far as I'm concerned, if you're willing to learn from others (regardless of which side of the slash they live on), you're kind, accepting, practice as safely as possible within you and your partners limits, you're respectful of others even if they have differing opinions/practices or beliefs, then you're as 'real' and 'true' as can be. I may not agree with you...I may not even want to spend time with you or associate with you, but I certainly won't malign you as being 'fake'.

I am tired of let people in....  I feell stupid for trusting.  I'm tired of finally letting my walls down, opening up and to someone who has such a special and major important role in my life.. only to be discarded at the slightest change of mood.  People just don't care what it does to a person.  My feelings.. matter.. I am who I say I am.. Some people want to just form a judgment and assumption of me unfairly and to disregard my truth because they find some created idea in their mind to be more legitimate.  So they pick manufactured fiction formed by their imagination... over the facts and truth from the source.. yeah.. that makes a whole lot of sense huh..   I think I need to learn that if someone wants to believe the worst about me, then they were looking for an excuse.  I just want to say these men who message me deep and all acting like they care for me or my well being and like they have my back and talk to me every day and block me over nothing??  Please do not put me through this and play games with me.. Please.  I have been through enough and you have no care for the emotional hell and self loathing and mind fuckery you leave me to stew in..  My mental health matters and there is no need to lead me on and let me drop.  I need to keep putting myself out there to find the right one for me, but the fallout from the disbelief and hurt and confusion.. It makes me feel an absolute fool for believing someone who seemed genuine with a real interest in me..  That's a mind fuck.  My psyche cannot keep taking this kind of unfair and immature mistreatment.     Please... I just want someone real, for once.  Not put on or an act or manipulation.  Just be real.  

Hello, I was bored so I took some time to go state by state and look at the basic category of profiles at appealed to me. There is quite an ecliptic number of very interesting people with truly Kink-based desires.  A thought-provoking side issue was that either the website is randomly broken or people who are in many cases requiring complete honesty are not quite providing it. There is a mileage indication on many of the profiles which is the distance from where I am located to where they are.  I'll use Dallas as an example, it is approximately 1300 miles from Los Angeles. Amazingly many profiles had distances in the low hundreds of miles to nearly double the 1300 miles.   It is thought-provoking that's for sure. 

Helping someone with a self-image problem can be a delicate and challenging task, but there are some things you can do to provide support and guidance: Listen actively: Let the person know that you are there for them and that you care about their feelings. Encourage them to express their thoughts and feelings, and let them know that you are listening to them without judgment. Validate their feelings: Let the person know that their feelings are valid, even if you don't fully understand or agree with them. Help them to challenge negative thoughts: Encourage the person to question and challenge negative thoughts about themselves. Help them to identify and replace negative self-talk with more positive and realistic thoughts. Encourage them to practice self-compassion: Self-compassion can help individuals to be kind and understanding towards themselves, rather than self-critical. Encourage them to treat themselves with the same kindness, concern, and understanding they would offer to a good friend.

 Phalanx86