Vacation!  It's finally here. A time I can relax and enjoy ... And process my future. I'm so damn old and I'm trying to figure out if I should settle. Just call everything off or hell continue just talking the talk but never walking the walk. This is a sufficient approach but every few weeks to months I'm gonna crash out and spiral downward... Ok so maybe not... The alternative is to find at my old, big back age the lifestyle I thought I was gonna live. Actually, the more I think about it my bf was supposed to be that and it gradually grew into this platonic vanilla relationship we have now. But I get to play as much videogames as I like and smoke. So maybe it's a good trade off. 2 activities I refuse to give up. They're my precious hobbies. I dunno. I gave myself 2 weeks to really figure out my life because I feel like I'm at a crossroads: stay or seriously go. I don't mind being alone. Loneliness sucks but that's not a factor for me. .. Ok maybe a very small one. It's not like my bf and I are fucking. That's another reason why to go but also sex isn't... It is... It's very very important but I want bdsm much more than just fucking. I didn't mean porn and I don't mean sessions...I mean lifestyle. I call it sex because it's what my master and I do. But it was more than just sex. It was control, mastery, manipulation, force, molding, and so much more. I can find one night stands and I'm left needing more. So maybe I should settle? Gah! I just don't fucking know.

When punishing a girl, a discerning owner will not restrain her. The purpose of punishment is to teach a lesson and that lesson is usually one of helping her learn control. Sometimes of what she says, other times of what she does or doesnt do. She has to learn a better way, to understand the needs of the one she serves, and to behave accordingly. When I punish it is with a cane. The girl is bent over something like a bed or desk or chair, and allowed to get set into a position. My preferred place for punishment is over a desk, arms either outstretched in front or to the sides, legs spread but not excessively, and the girl's rear exposed. Then I use chalk to mark where her hands and feet are and we begin. The rules are simple. No outbursts or the count starts over. No lifting hands or feet or the count starts over. If the chalk lines are excessively smudged, the count starts over. She counts. She may ask permission for an interlude, but if she does so without good reason then the count starts again. If she cannot control herself when it is wholly to her benefit to do so, then perhaps this is not the world for her. If she can, then the punishment serves its purpose, she atones and life moves on to more pleasurable things. Either way, his will be done should be the mantra on every girls lips.

I'm going to use an anecdote to give a little insight about what I like. It may be a little long but bear with me. I had a Dom/friend, he's in Arkansas now, we met at a party & his then GF was yelling at him & he was yelling at her. Was ruining the vibe so I told her to go upstairs, and took him outside. Went up stairs, chatted with her: She didn't like him talking to other girls. Stupid nagging problems. Went downstairs. Talked to him out in the alley. He didn't like that she slept with his friends when she was mad at him. Which sort of ticked me off. Anyway we chatted and he gave me an out of the blue kiss. Then next day all day sucking/fucking. He liked playing the XBox while getting head. Watching porn and getting head. And having someone to rub his feet, his back. I told him his ex GF was a bitch & the worst kind - the one who sends pics of her fucking to him. He did love her and It made me want to please and make him feel special. I told him he could do whatever he wanted with me. He liked being complimented and thought of. I like his build & personality. He had some kinks like enjoying being rimmed, choking, verbal and I was always open for him when he needed to fuck. I liked it when he sat on my face and made me eat his ass while he relaxed and even when he put his foot in my mouth and had me worship his feet. I enjoyed him being at a desk with me under it, soft cock in my mouth. It'll grow until it was ready to fuck my face then after he came it'll rest in my mouth until he was ready again. We became pretty good friends. Discreet fuck buddies the entire time since the crazy Ex was still around & we both liked no one knowing our business. He moved out to AK closer to family but we both had a great time and I enjoyed being there for him and making him feel like a King. I knew my place, he knew my place and we both knew his place. - 2017

⛧ The Spiral Was Never His—It Was Mine ⛧ I was never taken. It wasn't required. I gave everything without a single thrust.   My silence was toyed with like it was rope, pulled it tighter until I moaned without sound. It was called control. But I called it study.   Because while my burn was being monitored, I was watching the stall.   And somewhere between the withheld rewards and the weaponized distance, I realized: My obedience was mistaken for blindness. But I saw everything.   I marked my skin with the phrases never said. I wore plugs to dinner parties, kept the ghost curled up inside me. Ownership was implied. My unraveling was seen as a result not of my own doing.   But no man who fears the full depth of a woman deserves to command her surrender.   I have danced naked at the edge of madness and begged for more. I have waited, soaked and starving, and still purred like prey. And now, I’m no longer kneeling. I’m watching.   If you find this and feel your cock twitch or your chest tighten—good. But ask yourself this:   Can you starve me properly? Can you devour me completely? Can you wield a submissive who already knows your tricks before you play them?   Because I don’t need another puppet master. I need a god who wants a feral offering.

For those of you who do not already know.. i have a medical condition called lymphedema, it affaspects my legs. The condition caused large ulcers to form on the backs of my legs six years ago!! my left leg healed up within the first or second year, however the ulcers on my right leg are still there. At one point it was one large wound, about the size of a dinner plate!! They are much smaller but still a significant size and depth. Anyway, my wound dressings are soooo painful!! i am currently using preion pain meds, extra strength fake Tylenol, concentrated cannabis, and cannabis gummies.. NOT all at the same time. Today i ate a large pineapple flavored cannabis gummy. i was told it was equal to 3 servings!! i was STILL in severe pain for more than an hour and a half!! Full on bawling my head off and big fat non stop tears. Should ANYONE have a suggestion.. please leave the information in my mail. Any help is GREATLY appreciated. Thank you all, so very much.

Last profile wasn't showing. So here we go, i am looking for 2 females for poly, those who can take or not but will take pain, also 1 for domestic chores. I have a illness, so i live with my brother, so that puts most off, but you don't try, you don't get. If you can see past that, then great.

Arousals continuing to build, she's craving to touch, to play and craving connection and interaction. Her sweet scent filling the room, permission to play, she places her puppy tail in along with her halter gag with a nice cock attachment which filled her mouth.. Her glass toy, clothes pins on her nipples and vibration wands in her hands.. The rain coming down outside her window send her mind into a relaxed state.. While she gives her body a taste of what it's been craving... Riding the waves of tease and denial. Find that edge, removing the vibe and the smacks of her hand to her cunt sending waves of pain mixed with sensations of delicious pleasures.. She begs and pleads .. wining into her gag, wanting so badly to cum... But that is not her choice.. she may only ride waves. Right to that edge once more.. denying what the mind and body both believe they want... Smacking and slapping those sensations away with baited breath.. Her body at the edge... Holding it as arousal floods her body and begins to crave more.

052426 Oy! Such fragility amongst some members.  Not ALL  men, but SOME men have been so PAMPERED, so sheltered in this life that they believe ALL WOMEN are there to serve their understandingS and expectationS.  I serve God, Me, Mum, and My cat lol  You are last on a loooooooooooooooooonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnngggggggggggggggggggg list. I am NURTURING, KIND and hold HIGH EXPECTATIONS.  You will work to be PHYSICALLY, MENTALLY, SPIRITUALLY 100% available in My presance or you will not be in My life.    If you are interested in serving Me, we will need to get to know one another through speaking by phone. I am available SUNDAY THROUGH THURSDAY AFTER 6PM EASTERN STANDARD TIME AND THROUGH BLOCKED PHONE, CHAT/MEET OR TEAMS, and WITH ADVANCE NOTICE. I dont sign in daily and sometimes not for weeks at a time.  If we speak once and then dont speak again for several months, WE ARE STARTING OVER. Keep it real people.  Keep it real.      

I was playing around and took the BDSM test.  Here are the results, even though I don't agree with some of them. == Results from bdsmtest.org ==  100% Rigger  100% Master/Mistress  99% Sadist  98% Voyeur  95% Dominant  90% Non-monogamist  89% Owner  75% Brat tamer  72% Degrader  68% Experimentalist  41% Exhibitionist  40% Primal (Hunter)  40% Masochist  38% Switch  29% Submissive  23% Rope bunny  20% Brat  19% Vanilla  15% Primal (Prey)  13% Daddy/Mommy  10% Pet  5% Slave  0% Boy/Girl  0% Degradee    0% Ageplayer   

ABOUT ME: I'm quirky, blunt, fun, wild, and just a little shattered. My days are sometimes too dark, sometimes too bright, and my nights are sometimes way too long. I am often strangled by my own insecurities as much as I am my over confidence. I require attention, long for passion and wish to be desired, to be lusted after, to be romanced darkly. I use music to speak when words fail me. but words are as important to the writer in me as the air I breathe. I am manic, overly optimistic and a dreamer who finds one beautiful thing about every day, no matter how bad it seemed. And even with all my flaws, even though I am difficult at times, I am worth every second.

Yes I'm here almost entirely for reading journals, the rare thoughtful empathetic intellectual exchange, and the rare opportunity to give support and make helpful suggestions to those relatively new, or looking deeper, who seek it and are appreciative of my time invested. Beyond *very* rare exceptions (none in a long time that appealed to me) I'm not here "looking" for relationship or sex or cybersex at all, and not in a long time any appealing online erotic correspondence. I'd update profile to say this more directly, but as others have said, the wait can be really very long before the profile is again approved.  So for above reasons I find myself returning to the website, and to look at this usually hidden part of the human mind and spirit, and and part present human society. For most of what I see, so much unnecessary hate and aggression but I don't need to write much about it here to condemn it..but then the gems, which don't have to be polished gems, just a person opening up, it could be non-BDSM, just writing on profile or journal about dealing with health, or dealing with the loss of life of a spouse..and you get glimpse of a human mind that's not through the usual filters. And on BDSM, or sexually in general,  similarly, being able to read glimpses of candor and the inner psychological world, an uncommon chance to read someone opening up..

In answer to an email of a Sir - perhaps others may find more of me too? Sir, I cannot limit myself to a list of check-off boxes, but I detest age play, cnc is something to be careful with and my nipples are simply pain 98%of the time. Water works in themselves aren't appealing to me, but being a slave, I've had bathroom privileges controlled, well, anything in life controlled, to varying levels. I'll obey, but telling me if I can piss or not will not arose me in the least. I'm pretty sure I outgrew roleplay at least a decade ago, but perhaps that wasn't just from a heavy kink community, but young kids.    I think I would be a real pressure on you, kink wise, as honestly, your list is very soft for me. I'm into REAL. I don't do structured scenes unless we're required to, I live my life with a kinky sstreak in all I do. I want a non-stop connection not just to love and laughter, friendship, lust, sex, and more - but to what we are D/s wise. Whether it be subtle like collar or chain, or overt like a controlled regimen or ritualized, it has to flow like the rest does. Not saying it won't ebb and flow, but like the ocean, it doesn't stop.    I need a man who's in the more aggressive and assertive edge. Controlling for his pleasure, but only to the limit of mine. there IS a line between use and abuse; I learned that the hard way. I am a heavy player, as my pictures on fet show. I provide that link very seriously because this website is far too "woke" for who I am. I'm very based, very raw, very tactile and serious. I walk my funny side hand in hand with my serious side and I'm careful of when to laugh or when to stop.    I am very cerebral, very into topics that interest me and I love a rousing argument just as much as I do a relaxed interaction. I get excited over things that others may not connect to other things I like and I slide between topics in a weave of conscious flow that can confuse many people. If you can't juggle 3 or more topics all at once, I'll wear you out intellectually.    Conversely, I'm an extroverted introvert and prefer my days at home, with a watch list of data, news, current events, 2a, political, historical, real crime, true events, etc - or with a book or three at a time.    Right now, medically, I'm pretty fragile, which I detest, but have to admit to. I am kajira, a slave, property such as a dog. I believe chauvinism is how 99% of the world should be and women in power its destroying things faster than men alone ever have. I cannot undo my slavery, no more than excise my brand. I will always see life through the rules of such. That means absolute honesty. I can be careful of how I come across, I can be selective of who and what I answer - unless it's my owner - but to lie by omission is still a lie. I will need help, literally, to get back to the ability to be physically active, in all ways. I don't know if my lungs, or my heart, will ever recover to the point where I will be free of the need for oxygen assistance and cardiac awareness. Right now, living alone (minus teenagers) I have to be careful not to overdo or I end up either collapsed or in the ER... or both. It's scary and mentally... devastating.    I hope this... helps you see deeper into who I am, all around.    Kimberly 

I have been on this site for years and see the same profile of ladies seeking a someone like myself. Contact is made, profiles viewed yet nothing. occassionally someone says hi and we exchange messages, and then nothing and i find that often times the dead air is asking for verification on where they live or interest that they have already posted in their profiles.  So many ladies want to be in charge, they advertise they are dominant seeking a male sub/slave, thye want to take the lead, yet nearly all wait for the guy to make first contact and when it happens they ghost or get upset that an I was not dotted or T not crossed. I realize the ladies may get slammed by a lot of players espcially on a freee site like this one. But if you reallyh want to be in control, ignore the players and seek out us real guys, make the first move and follow through. You seek perfectionn from the first hello but that is impossible for anyone including the ladies making contact.  We are two adults seeking to meet connect and build a relationship, if the only connection is BDSM the connection will be lost quickly. So my request is to stop searching for the ideal submssive and instead focus on building a relationship with said person and through your guideance and training help us /me to be perfct for you 

Having fun doing scheduling and booking all of the models for footnight event.  Always spending time researching and being sure the people who attend are true fetishists.  No fakes.  Getting some feedback on why we are so choosy.  Is this bad?  When learing of different fetishes and participating.  Never wanted to play as a fake.  Always wanted to be clear that a fetish is respected and the energy exchange is coming from a true place.  FN, being around since 2002, the fact that foot fetish is so open and mainstream now, we do try to respect it for those who are not just trying to make rent or pay their cell bill, but have a community that does not judge and understands foot worship.  Are we wrong?  I don't think so.  Respect and trust goes right next to consent. Don't you? FootNight Savage

Well, it is nearing the end of 2022 and since we are very limited to update profiles on the site… I figured I would get an update here.   Well, it is nearing the end of 2022 and since we are very limited to update profiles on the site… I figured I would give an update here.   I am 44 years old, still living in the Fort Lauderdale Florida area, and I have an open marriage.    Have an open marriage.   It is not so easy to correspond care, feel free to find me with the same name on fet. i've been involved in the lifestyle since about 2000 and I am only looking for real connections.   if you just want to chat and are too far away to meet. Please look for someone that is interested in the same things as you. That will not be me.   I still love to serve, love the smell of leather, and love hypnosis. Most other things are negotiable.   Thanks for reading.   thanks for reading. Becca

I read another dominant women has been having similar experiences to me. As a dominant women I am being approached by men ALREADY in a relationship with another women, and the women is submissive. Simply because the man wants to encourage a FFM situation.  Completely ignoring the fact I am after MMF. What is scary is the investment these men will make to talk, to get to know me and ask me about my ambitions and ideas and intrigued I have a brain and what they are after is the same FFM.  I spend my day dedicated to my work so I am not bitter about minimal time wasting and have not invested much time other than the odd evening having the page open in the background while watching the BBC but it worries me that some NOT ALL men are just carbon copies of the same idiot 5 minutes before.  I have a new respect for trans women, they were once men with an original unique thought and evolved into a women, there is something ironic about the whole butterfly transformation. Also while I am ranting, can dominant men stop asking if I wear a certin type of shoe.  I own 30 pairs shoes including trainers, I have a lot of lingerie but if you want a women to wear a particular brand or type, I suggest you just make yourself available on a weekend and I will happily spend your money buying the shoes and lingerie you want me to wear and watch your satisfaction that you spent your money on La Perla and Jimmy choos.  FYI if your obsessed about shoes you have a foot fetish!  

A little poetry?  Sure, why not.   In realms where love unfolds its gentle sway, A man finds bliss in night and sunlit day. Within the dance of hearts, a truth revealed, In female-led embrace, his joy's congealed.   Beneath her gaze, a beacon burning bright, He revels in the tender, guiding light. Her strength, a fortress that he gladly seeks, In every whispered word, the solace speaks.   No tyranny, but harmony they find, A partnership where hearts and souls entwined. He cherishes the power she bestows, A union blossoms, like a fragrant rose.   Her laughter, like a melody divine, Resounds within his heart, a sweet design. Together, they traverse life's winding road, In tandem, love's enchanting episode.   She leads with grace, a compass sure and true, He finds his purpose in her eyes of blue. Her wisdom shapes their journey through the years, A symphony of joy, dispelling fears.   He revels in the kindness she bestows, Her love, a river, steadily it flows. He willingly surrenders to her care, In tender moments, love is everywhere.   No shackles bind, but freedoms they unfold, In her embrace, a sanctuary bold. A partnership where balance finds its place, He celebrates the joys of her embrace.   In shared delight, their spirits intertwined, He savors every moment, love defined. A male perspective on this blessed path, In her-led love, he finds eternal warmth.  

  I need you to innocently move in close while I am talking to you -- your touch on my hip like it belongs there. Drift your fingers under the fabric, lean in and murmur "I'm still listening." Make my voice falter, my words scramble, my mind tangle, and deliberately distract me. Then, casually, make me answer your soft questions, like nothing is being done to me. But increase the pressure. Make my mind melt. Make my thoughts b lur. Make me forget the point in all of this.Make it so that speaking my mind becomes hard, and that giving you my body becomes the preferred expression of my opinions.

How to find a Female Dominant aka Domme/Mistress? (Helpful hints for male subs) The first thing you should realize is that it is going to take time. Do not rush it or be inpatient. Dominant women are much sought after and will be very very picky. You have a lot of competition. So, what can you do to make yourself stand out? Know thyself! What do you need from a D/s relationship? Are you a service sub? Keep an open mind but know your hard limits. If you are new and inexperienced then state you do not know your limits yet. A Dominant will doubt your sincerity if you say you are a no limits sub. Examine what you can offer a FemDom. What skills to you posses?  Are you a good cook? Learn the art of massage perhaps. Have a variety of interests. Be well read. Brush up your conversation skills. Also, your personality and the ability to stimulate a Dominant's mind will get you further than your cock Appearance is important. You do not have to be an Adonis but take pride in yourself. Be well groomed with clean clothes and good hygiene. Improve your level of fitness. It takes a lot of energy and physical strength to be bound for example. Stand up straight, walk tall, and be proud that you are submissive.  Devotion and loyalty are a must. You must demonstrate that you can be loyal to HER. You are not hitting on every FemDom in the room. It is incredibly sexy for a man to openly express his devotion especially through body language. Are you standing at her side but looking at others? Being a slut to any FemDom is not respectful. Being her own personal slut alone is perfect. Have some self-respect. Confidence is sexy. You can be confident and submissive. Who wants someone who thinks they are worthless. Know that you have value! That your submission is a gift that you do not bestow willy nilly. It makes it more special and interesting to the Dominant. Learn about service. Not sexual service. Be prepared to do things for her that have nothing to do with your kink. Offer to help make life easier for her. Run errands for her. You can clean up her house or mow her lawn without having to be naked or wear a maid's outfit. Get involved in your local BDSM community. It shows you take the life seriously. You are trying to experience it first hand. Make friends in the community so that you have a support system as well. You may not meet your dream FemDom right away but the friends you make may introduce you to others Your profile needs to be a representation of you. Remember you never get another chance to make a first impression! Spell check, spell check, and spell check! Punctuation and proper grammar go a long way. Avoid text speak. Be concise but at least a few paragraphs about you as a person (not just as sub). List your main fetishes and dislikes in other words keep it simple. Enough to pique interest but not so much as to bore the Dominant to tears. Quotes that are reflective of you or your beliefs are interesting. A nice picture is worth a thousand words truly. No cock shots. If a Female Dominant wants to see your cock then she will ask.

Absolutely. This topic has teeth, and the core point is strong enough to carry the whole post. Tenacity Is Not Submission: When Persistence Becomes Pressure There is a particular kind of message that some people mistake for devotion. The repeated check-in after being told no. The “just seeing if you changed your mind.” The second profile after the first one was blocked or ignored. The email after the site message went unanswered. The insistence that persistence proves sincerity. It does not. Persistence can be admirable when it is used to improve yourself, honor a commitment, or follow through on something consensual. But when persistence is aimed at wearing down someone else’s boundary, it is not devotion. It is pressure. And in BDSM, pressure is not submission. A submissive who cannot obey a boundary is not showing devotion. He is auditioning his disobedience. That may sound blunt, but it needs to be said plainly. Submission is not measured by how many times someone keeps coming back after being told no. Submission is measured by respect, self-control, honesty, and the ability to listen when the answer is not the one he wanted. “No” Is Not a Negotiation Invitation One of the biggest red flags in early BDSM communication is the person who treats “no” as the beginning of a negotiation. No, I am not interested. No, that dynamic does not work for me. No, I am not available for that kind of play. No, I do not want to continue this conversation. Those are complete answers. They do not require a court case. They do not require repeated follow-up. They do not require the other person to justify their boundary in a way the rejected party personally approves of. A respectful person may feel disappointed. That is normal. Rejection stings. But an emotionally mature person accepts the answer and steps back. An unsafe person keeps pushing. “But I’m Just Being Persistent” Persistence is often romanticized, especially by people who do not want to examine their own behavior. They frame it as loyalty. They call it determination. They insist they are proving how badly they want to serve. But there is a difference between being consistent and being invasive. Consistency says, “I respect your pace.” Pressure says, “I will keep appearing until you give me what I want.” Consistency says, “Your boundary matters.” Pressure says, “Your boundary is an obstacle.” Consistency says, “I can accept your no.” Pressure says, “I only respect your answer if it benefits me.” That distinction matters. A submissive who wants access to a Dominant’s time, attention, authority, or body needs to show that he can be trusted with limits. If he cannot respect a simple “not interested,” why would anyone trust him inside a more intimate or vulnerable dynamic? Disobedience Does Not Become Cute Because It Is Wrapped in Flattery Some people try to soften boundary-pushing with compliments. “I’m still interested.” “You’re exactly what I’m looking for.” “I just can’t stop thinking about serving you.” “I know you said no, but I had to try again.” No, he did not “have to.” He chose to. And that choice reveals something important. Flattery does not erase disrespect. Desire does not override consent. Interest does not create entitlement. A person can use all the submissive language in the world and still behave in a way that is controlling, invasive, or manipulative. Calling someone “Mistress” while ignoring her boundary is not submission. It is cosplay with bad manners. Real submission requires discipline. That includes the discipline to accept disappointment without turning it into someone else’s problem. Early Behavior Predicts Later Behavior The beginning of communication is not separate from the dynamic. It is part of the screening process. How someone handles a boundary early on tells you a lot about how they may handle limits later. If he argues with your preferences now, he may argue with your rules later. If he ignores your disinterest now, he may ignore your safeword later. If he creates new ways to reach you after being blocked, he may escalate when denied access. If he treats your “no” as temporary, he is telling you that consent is only meaningful to him when it can be changed in his favor. That is not a small thing. In BDSM, trust is not built by intensity alone. Trust is built by repeated evidence that someone can hear a boundary, understand it, and honor it even when they are disappointed. Submissive Does Not Mean Helpless There is also a pattern where some self-identified submissives act as if their desire excuses their lack of self-regulation. They present themselves as overwhelmed by need. They act wounded when they are not chosen. They imply that a Dominant is cruel for not giving them attention. They confuse emotional dependency with devotion. That is not service. A Dominant is not responsible for managing the emotions of every stranger who wants access to her. A submissive still has adult responsibilities. He is responsible for his conduct, his reactions, his expectations, and his ability to leave people alone when asked. Submission is not an exemption from emotional maturity. In fact, submission requires more emotional maturity, not less. When Persistence Becomes Pressure Persistence becomes pressure when the other person has already declined. It becomes pressure when contact continues after interest has been clearly refused. It becomes pressure when someone changes accounts, platforms, or methods to get around being ignored or blocked. It becomes pressure when the person being contacted feels they must manage, explain, soften, or repeat a boundary that was already clear. It becomes pressure when the goal is not connection, but access. That is the moment the behavior stops being flattering. It starts feeling desperate. Performative. Entitled. Unsafe. And no one owes continued politeness to someone who repeatedly ignores a boundary. The Better Response A submissive who receives a no has one correct r

Piercings Piercings can be incorporated into BDSM play as a form of body modification and enhancement of sensory experiences. However, it's important to note that piercings are a personal choice, and engaging in any BDSM activities involving piercings should be based on informed consent, safety, and proper aftercare. Here are some points to consider: 1. Informed Consent: Consent is vital in any BDSM activity, including piercing play. All participants should have a clear understanding of the risks, implications, and intentions behind the piercing. Open and honest communication is crucial to ensure that everyone involved is comfortable, informed, and consents willingly to the activity. 2. Safety and Hygiene: If piercings are involved in BDSM play, it is essential to prioritize safety and hygiene. Sterilization of piercing equipment and following proper aftercare protocols are vital to minimize the risk of infection and other complications. It's advisable to consult a professional piercer who adheres to strict hygiene standards and has experience in BDSM-related piercings. 3. Sensation and Aesthetics: Piercings can provide unique sensations and aesthetic enhancements during BDSM play. They can be used as points of attachment for restraints or other bondage accessories, adding an element of control or vulnerability. Sensory play involving piercings, such as gentle tugging or stimulation, can also be explored within negotiated boundaries and consent. 4. Healing and Aftercare: It's important to consider the healing process and aftercare of piercings. Certain BDSM activities may put stress on freshly pierced areas, hindering the healing process. Adequate time should be allowed for healing before engaging in any activities that might disrupt or damage the piercing. Following proper aftercare instructions provided by a professional piercer is essential to minimize complications and promote healing. 5. Emotional and Psychological Impact: It's crucial to recognize that piercings can have emotional and psychological significance for individuals. Engaging in BDSM activities involving piercings requires understanding and respect for each participant's feelings and boundaries. Regular communication, check-ins, and aftercare are essential to ensure the well-being and emotional support of all involved.   As with any BDSM practice, piercings should always be approached with caution, consent, and a focus on safety. Educating oneself, seeking guidance from professionals, and engaging in open communication with all participants are vital to creating a consensual and enjoyable experience.

Why language matters. Or, Darmok and Jalad. angeldmort 57F Domme I had a reminder this week, (not that this week is that unusual, but some cases are more extreme than others) at how important it is to have a common language in any interaction we have with others. Most of our lives, the average American at least walks around hearing English, speaking English, reading English, and assuming they understand what other people are saying. And vice versa - they assume they are understood. And yet, so much of our attempts to communicate end in misfires.   Often, it's because we don't really care enough about the interaction, and we glide along on autopilot, comfortable in the status quo quality of our interactions. We are usually getting enough of what we need out of it that we often don't even question it. Often, if there's a problem, we make a scene to make it clear that no, that's NOT what we meant, or that isn't what was said to us, etc but unless we feel slighted, or it leads to the loss of something we DO value - a comment made here that loses us a promotion, or a question not answered loses someone's interest, or a tone of voice makes us concerned for a possible loss of status- unless it's serious, it's just anger and fuss and it's over. THEN, it may become a real issue, worth some thought, but by then, it's really too late. The miscommunication has happened, the thought process it started it under way, and a feeling has been had, etc.   Stick with me here.   At it's most basic level, language is how we express a thought. It's pretty common to believe that most of the time, other people from a similar area have similar thoughts to our own about a general variety of things. We expect that they want the same basic things, because we are all human, and most of the people we deal with were raised similarly, and had similar experiences. And that they will use the same words as we do to describe them. That's where the screeching halt comes in.   "Most adult native test-takers range from 20,000–35,000 words." That's a decent vocabulary. It should mean that most of us that speak English will have plenty of words in common to have a discussion and be understood with enough clarity to make it through most common joint activities.   That said, most people don't tend to think too deeply about words themselves. Which means when you start to want more than just "enough to get by" conversation, things can get a bit complicated. And in cases where you need to negotiate something VERY specific, in depth, such as the fine details of kink or what our limits are... suddenly, your vocabulary will not only need to grow, but become very precise.   I'm not seeing that as often as I would expect from the letters I receive. In fact, the majority of people that write me seem frustrated by the need for words at all, and irritated by the requirement that we spend some time talking about anything that isn't a description of a sex act. Which baffles me... if you are wanting someone to tie you up, do ... THINGS ... to you, while you are helpless, etc, wouldn't you REALLY REALLY want to make sure that the things they want to DO are the same things you want DONE? Wouldn't you be DEEPLY interested in making sure they are the kind of person that honors your Safe Word, or who shares your definition of "honest," or who won't just walk off with your wallet and DVD player while you are tied down, or who won't turn out to be straight up batshit nuts?   I've had another rash of "own me" messages. Interspersed of course with the regular "total sub" offers.   The topic at hand isn't the "I'm a TOTAL sub!" who responds to "ok, go read this for me and tell me what you think" with "What? That's not what I want! I'm a SEXUAL submissive!" Or even the "i want to be ur slave" that can't obey enough to respond to an email on time.   This topic is about the problem that causes that problem in the first place.   I received one this week from a very pretty dick pic with an empty profile that did read enough to call me Domina, but obviously nothing else, so I sent a link to the "First Impressions" thread, and followed with "Consider Your Target Audience." You can guess how it went. Before he got to "Bye, Bitchhhhhh!" he told me he wanted me to "own" him. And he referred to himself as "very kinky like to be watched ! Masterbaiting live turns me on" (Yes, that's how he spelled it.) Meh. No great loss.   Later, sissy under consideration asked if I was at all interested by Dick Pic Guy. Aside from the obvious stunted mentality of thinking his naked dick somehow mattered, he was a good tool to explain the problem of common language/vocabulary.   While being turned on by being watched is very common, and whatever floats your boat, etc that he described himself as very kinky based on that was a VERY clear indicator that we weren't even speaking the same language in regards to kink. Much like the majority of the people that write me, he had an interest in something, and had set out to pursue that, and as it wasn't mainstream, they thought it must mean they were REALLY out there crazy kinky. (Hell, ex-husband number two thought anal was the height of twisted and kinky.) Now, obviously, there was no actual interest in submission, or desire to actually be owned, so there was no point in even considering trying to have a conversation.   However, if there actually HAD been interest, if he had just been a newbie and without clue, there would have been this huge gap of vocabulary to fill in before we could have ever tried to talk about anyth

My best friend has self terminated on Jan 26.I have always been one to put my best face forward, but I am not sure how I am going to be able to do that in the days to come. I had no warning, and I cannot understand why he has not reached out to me. To talk to me. I feel that if he had reached out to me I'd have talked him back from the ledge. I was supposed to buy him a beer when I saw him next, and him to buy me one in return. We were supposed to talk about the old days. Is this what growing old is?  To take all thsoe who you love, and those who love you in return? If so, I do not want to grow any older. I am done. I'd rather sleep a thousand years and hope that the passage of time deadens the pain in my heart. I am in my 40's and should not feel this pain. I should not be feeling this pain. I feel it is too soon. Family.... I get it.... but my brothers in arms.... It's too soon. 

CFNM Couples Tea Party 14th September 2024 4pm prompt  After many requests for couples to attend the AcadaMay CFNM Ladies Tea Party I have decided to heed your call!! Dominant Ladies are invited to bring their submissive partner to join the the Tea Party on 14th September for an afternoon of tea & wine with lashings of decadence. The submissives will be there solely to serve and cater to the ladies' every whim. You will never want to go to a vanilla tea party again!  This is NOT! purely for male/female couples, ladies who wish to bring their female submissive are also encouraged to join the party. And, as usual, single ladies and gentlemen are also very welcome to attend. Ladies, this is your chance to be served by submissives and objectify them in a group situation. Whilst CFNM includes activities that are not exclusively orientated towards female dominance and superiority, a modicum of humiliation and punishment to submissives not behaving according to protocol would be expected, nay, encouraged! Submissives, (whether male or female) ,this is your chance to parade and display yourself proudly in an elegant social setting, to have the opportunity to serve and make yourself compliant to the request of any lady present without demur or backchat. If you wish to have this experience, come and join the ladies for an afternoon of CFNM. The AcadaMay events/CFNM is also extremely inclusive and an absolutely safe and comfortable environment for single ladies attending on their own who wish to explore alternative scenarios in situation where they will be supported. All guests (both male and female) at the Tea Party will either need to be known personally by myself or will need to contact me with some brief details about themselves and a face photo so I know who they are. All in the strictest confidence and with the ultimate of discretion ;)  If you wish to attend send me a message!

On Being Felled, Temporarily   I have been absent. Those of you who follow closely will have noticed the silence and drawn your own conclusions. The conclusion is this: my body staged one of its more dramatic rebellions in the form of a kidney infection serious enough to take me entirely off the board for the better part of two weeks. I do not get sick quietly or briefly, apparently. When I go down I go down with the full commitment I bring to everything, which I would find more admirable if it were not so thoroughly inconvenient. I am on the other side of it now, or near enough to be upright and writing, which I am choosing to count as a victory. While I was ill, someone broke into my home. I want to let that sit for a moment because I am still sitting with it myself. I was sick, my children were unsettled, and someone decided that was an acceptable time to violate the space where my family lives and take what did not belong to them. They took the children's gaming system, which in the grand accounting of what could have been lost is not the worst possible outcome, and I know this, and I have said this to myself many times. It does not make my children's faces easier to look at. The specific devastation of a preteen who has had something taken, not misplaced, not broken accidentally, but deliberately stolen from their home, from the place that is supposed to be safe, is its own particular kind of heartbreak to witness as a mother. They were crushed. I was furious on their behalf in the way that only a mother's fury operates, which is to say completely and with no available outlet. I handled it alone. As I handle everything. And this is where I find myself needing to say something I do not say easily, which is that my resilience, that quality I have always counted on, felt genuinely shaken this past week. Not broken. I want to be precise about that because I will not be imprecise about myself even when honesty is uncomfortable. Not broken. But shaken in the way that a foundation shakes when too many things hit it simultaneously, the illness and the violation and the children's hurt and the daily weight of a life I carry without assistance, all of it arriving at once while my body was already at its limit. I had hoped, by now, to be in a different chapter. I had hoped, genuinely and specifically, to be in conversations about sharing a home with someone actually prepared to show up for this life. Someone whose service was not theoretical, not a future intention, not a beautiful idea that dissolves on contact with the reality of what showing up actually requires. Someone who would have been here during a kidney infection that left me barely functional. Someone whose presence would have meant my children came home from school to a stable and managed household rather than to a mother running on empty and a space that had been violated. That person does not currently exist in my life, and the disappointment of that is not small. It is not something I can dress up into acceptance without first acknowledging that it is a genuine and specific grief. I built a vision. I know what I deserve. I know what this dynamic looks like when it is real and functional and inhabited by someone with actual capability and actual commitment. The gap between that knowledge and my current reality is something I feel most acutely on the weeks that ask the most of me. I am resilient. I will return to myself completely, as I always do. But this week the crown was heavy. I wanted to tell you that honestly, because this space has always been about the full truth of this life, not only its beauty.   More soon. I am still here. I am still unserved. I am still waiting and wanting. 

Good Morning Ladies and Gents- well it's a great morning anyway,  here in the hills of East TN.  Had a great time in Illinois this past week, looked up some old friends, and partied a bit.  I was sorry to hear that my old friend Paul C of Paul C Leathers had passed away early this year.  I have been out of touch with the Chicago LGBTQ community.   Enjoyed being invited to my friend Carlas'  Bed, Breakfast, and Bondage weekend.   Thanks to Carla, Bob, Travis, Julie, Jessica, Hanna, and  Amanda for the love!  Happy LOCKtober! Well, I'm growing closer to 71 now, had one Hell of a great run thus far, but am slowing down a bit. Where are all the lovely women around my age?   Getting too old to build your dungeons anymore so don't ask me to.  I do have contacts that can help if you can afford it. The damn hurricane did much damage to Places such as Greenville, Sevierville TN, but especially the Ashville area of North Carolina. :(    My God Interstate 26 is closed!   As a practicing Christian, Man, I pray for the lost and the survivors.  The older I got the less time we seem to have to get things done. I have been wanting to upgrade my journal for some time.   Thanks for reading!      

  New Year After a brief discussion this morning we have agreed on a few things to try and get the most out of 2023. wearing my daily collar more often (as permitted by job, etc) more butt plugs less underwear more outfits with access when home more use of the belt more opportunities for us to explore with others Happy New Year!

i really feel badly over what transpired this past week. i have enjoyed many rewarding experiences in r/l and sometimes talking via this site can open up minds and really get minds thinking towards a r/l meeting. there have been some special people i have met and they are exactly what i expected. i think i need to step back from this site. it hasn't happen in sometime, but i think someone has ghosted me, i guess they were not up to coffee or a meal. i do not play on my first meet. that is just dangerous.  so my mind closes again until someone is clever enough to open it. this world is not bs to me, but maybe vanilla is the answer....

Tree of life and tree of knowledge were not actually trees. The tree of life was God and the tree of knowledge was the devil. The devil was actively talking to Eve in the garden about how he felt towards God. Eve was believing him and started talking to Adam about it who wasn't sure but eventually sided with his wife Eve. They wanted the devil to rule over them instead of God. It was the devil who told them they were naked. It was the devil who said they weren't getting what they truly needed from God. When God came to the garden they hid from him thinking he was the bad guy that the devil made them to believe. They were clothed with leaves. God questioned this and asked who told them they were naked and they told them the devil did. God then asked them what else the devil said. God then gave them a choice to worship him or follow under the devil's care. They chose the devil. God kicked them out of the garden and explained to them they would die one day because they were leaving the tree of life behind and they would no longer have access to it. They would have to learn from their choices. 

Ich + Ich - So soll es bleiben   Ich warte schon so langeAuf den einen MomentIch bin auf der SucheNach hundert ProzentWann ist es endlich richtigWann macht es einen SinnIch werde es erst wissenWenn ich angekommen bin Ich will sagenSo soll es seinSo kann es bleibenSo hab ich es mir gewünschtAlles passt perfekt zusammenWeil endlich alles stimmtUnd mein Herz gefangen nimmt Wenn es da ist, werd ich feiernIch weiß, da ist noch mehrEs liegt noch so viel vor mirIch lauf noch hinterherBis jetzt fühl ich nur die HälfteVon allem, was gehtIch muss noch weitersuchenWeil immer noch was fehlt Ich will sagen:So soll es seinSo kann es bleibenSo hab ich es mir gewünschtAlles passt perfekt zusammenWeil endlich alles stimmtUnd mein Herz gefangen nimmt Ich weiß nicht, wo du bistOder wo du wohnstAber eins ist sicherDass es sich lohntIch bete jede NachtDass ich dich finde Und du sagstSo soll es seinSo kann es bleibenSo hab ich es mir gewünschtAlles passt perfekt zusammenWeil endlich alles stimmt So soll es seinSo kann es bleibenGenau so ist es gutAlles passt perfekt zusammenWeil endlich alles in mir ruht Yeah...Oh...Yeah...Oh...Yeah... So soll es seinSo kann es bleibenSo hab ich es mir gewünschtAlles passt perfekt zusammenWeil endlich alles stimmtUnd mein Herz gefangen nimmt    

DISAPPOINTED-  There is a difference between presence and performance. When we meet in public, energy speaks louder than words, and truth has a way of revealing itself without effort. I pay attention to alignment — between actions and intentions, between spoken language and written expression, between who you present yourself to be and who you actually are. Lately, something feels off. The version of you I encounter in person does not fully match the one you portray through your writing. Words can be crafted, polished, and arranged to create an impression — but authenticity cannot be manufactured. It either exists, or it does not. Our recent meeting here in Folsom raised clear red flags for me. What I observed in person did not align with the image presented through your words. When behavior, tone, and presence do not match the story being told, it signals inconsistency — and inconsistency erodes trust. We live in a culture saturated with illusion — curated images, rehearsed personas, half-truths, and quiet deception both online and off. Masks have become normal. Pretending has become easier than being real. But I am not interested in illusions, performances, or carefully edited versions of truth. Transparency matters to me. Consistency matters. I value what is real, even when it is imperfect, over what is carefully constructed to appear a certain way. Facades are exhausting to maintain, and eventually they crack. When they do, truth stands on its own — calm, clear, and undeniable. I am direct, observant, and grounded in what is genuine. What you see is what you get. I do not perform, and I do not pretend. In a world full of filters and deception, I remain authentic — as real as you will find. Be real. I can see through what is not.

Many messages- let's addres and be clear and concise.  So many have this aversion to Dominants who are interested in transactional ects of this lifestyle and so many have been taken advantage of, hurt, scammed. I am so sorry you've put yourself in such position, except- own it and wear a helmet. If youre that desperate but only wish to live bi-curiously through your online persona, behind the security of a screen and your cowardice; please do not judge and condemn those of Us who truly are committed to who We are as dominants.  This may not be the absolute truth, it is simply My experience in over fifteen years in this particular site, lifestyle and walking in My truth and acceptance as a Dominant Woman, you seek leadership, direction, guidance, for someone else to take the responsability (often times, the burden) of where you are and guide you to be the best you can be, to serve Us. Power exchange is not, at least for Me, a kink. It is My identity, in every ect and area of of My life. So, approach with humility, accountabilit and honesty to your own self, to who and what you say you are. Do not, however, message me with aimless superficial comments, idle or vain conversation or the worst- requests as though you are pulling up a drive thru window topping from the bottom making requests and commands.    Infinite question?-" How does one earn a spot at Goddes' feet?"   Through committed, consistent actions. Bdsm aside, that’s how a man, woman( however it is you identify as)who knows who he/she is/ they are, what he/she/they is/are doing, what his/her/their purpose is and what he/she is /they are willing to be or become to get it knows the price for anything is actions for it speaks of who he/she is they are, his/her character and value. Values are simply what W/we value most above all else. Values are Priorities. The higher the priorities, higher the standard- My standards. The higher the price paid in any power exchange is and will always be submission and sacrifice of who you are through your actions, not words.  sacrifice of your time, commitment and honest and consistent actions and communication. That in itself is money, is the kind of money, finances, many here do not have  because as subs or slaves the are simply not it or are not at the level I and many dominants deserve. All is well, so lukewarm and flakes or those who revel in nice ideas and words but are not in a covenant and commitment towards who they are. Many are not even aware they are required and must take ownership of their identity. Who it is you, as a sub or slave, at best are mediocre, and at worst are cowards. so they’re filtered away by their limitations and mediocrity. Many of you discarded and ignored to continue to repeat the same level, course, process, lessons over and over and over because you are completely comfortable in your discomfort, victim hood and mediocrity whilst continue to complain why you are where you are, why you suffer, for you do not see that is you who limits yourself. Without said self revelation and acceptance, there cannot be space for the discipline and obedience to your own self as a submissive, slave. Taking ownership, accountability and responsibility of this self awareness is to be committed and loyal to who it is you are at your core and pay whatever price necessary; whether it is parts of yourself, to be transformed, upgraded, or simply let go and let die so your true self can be liberated through deed. This is one very finite answer to what I mean by “earn a spot at Goddess’ feet”- at any dominants feet quite frankly.   We are what W/we give and in return what W/we are and give is also what is returned to U/us ten fold. To serve is a privilege that requires sacrifice and courage, to give is also to receive. Both are one and the same. For Me? This is the standards I adhere and live by- so whatever is done for Me I know is the minimum for I know who and what as a sub or slave with trust, committed actions and guidance My subs have flourished and transformed into their own personal and professional lives. 

I could Not update my profile without risking a long approval period, so I am updating here! my age is 47, not sure why that never updates. I am Heterosexual not pan sexual (not sure how that got changed). I am worth the time and effort, a one of a kind woman, who is not soon forgotten.  Looking for a male Dom in my area for real time. I am a sub, I will NOT send you dirty pics. Please be single and available, please be real, please be honest, please have your life together, as I do.  I am again looking for real time, would prefer a HOH type arrangement or relationship. Please be ready to verify who You are and meet within a reasonable timeframe! I am a loyal sub, I am kind and understanding, and mostly obedient ;).  I do not play games and expect you wouldn't want to either.  I like to travel, read, go to the beach, and write. I can hold a conversation. I hope you can as well!  I am passionate about this lifestyle and see it as a way of life, not a bedroom game.  thank you for looking at my profile! 

My dog clogged the toilet.  Okay, technically, I am the one who flushed the wipes, but it was all her. You know those treats that fit into some sort of holder and are meant to occupy the dog for quite some time? She ripped the holder and instead of it taking hours to eat the treat, she ate it in a matter of minutes. Everything seemed fine. And then I woke around 2:30 to her trying to eat a great big pile of mush that had just come out of her butt. Gross. So what do I do? I grab flushable wipes to clean it up. And then I flush them. And then the toilet revolted. Thank the lord I have more than one because I forgot about it until I came back upstairs and it's still unuseable. I looked up how to fix this. There is no magic solution to pour in there and dissolve them. The plunger is most definitely not working. I cannot call a plumber and tell him the dog clogged the toilet. This is just another problem for Tomorrow Me. And probably Middle of the Night Me. And that's not even the end of the story, but that's all I've got left to give tonight.  *Update*  I FIXED IT!!! I seriously thought I was going to have to explain this to a plumber. I just spent a lot of time plunging. And um, then I had to pee. So maybe I had the magic solution because right after I tinkled, flushed, and plunged, it worked. Natural plumber, at your service. 

    I'm 5'9 160lbs and have a smooth/waxed body with a large smooth bubble butt. Dick comes in at a thick 7 inches and is circumcised with low hanging balls. I'm pretty happy with my package. Lean submissive. Little bro/son Or beta for an Alpha type.   Generally more passive or submissive in my friendships and relationships. I enjoy fitness, cooking and meeting new people when I go out. Enjoy breath play particularly during oral as well as being an overall submissive. Not only just in the bedroom but with him in general; taking notice of his interest and hobbies. Using that to find ways to please him until he feels satisfied with the disappearance of nuance stresses that plague all of us everyday. Having a Dom relax and not worry what he does or says and takes a breather without having to refocus on his sub and their needs is what I like. I get along well with confident dominant types. Getting to the point where I lower my inhibitions and use my body to bring out the gratification he deserves. To the point where I relax and allow myself to be taken under his control. I'm a sub male in general. I workout towards a tone fit build over big muscles to have more of a streamline body.

Well, I finally decided to unhide my profile after several years of isolation due to the pandemic.  Thought I might be able to find a good slave boy just in case we ever have to go back into a lockdown situation so that I am not left all alone without a sub/slave to use.  Nice to see there are fewer scammers, but seems there are less profiles, too.  BUT apparently the head games and b,s, have not changed much!  Guys, ghosting anyone is rude and unacceptable!  It reflaspects poor character when you make a date or agree to submission and then just disappear without any word!  Why would you lead someone on for several weeks and tell them how much you adore them, only to ghost and block them??  Hell, make up a viable excuse, but don't burn your bridges!  At least show some consideration and that you can be responsible for your actions!  And what is up with the old pics on profiles?  Some of you have not updated your age or profile pic in the last 10+ years that I have been on this site!!  Didn't you know you can change your personal stats without needing approval from Admin??  I realize pics need approval, but not to update your stats!  Up to this point, I have tried being socialable and understanding, but there comes a time when the Dom in me has to come out one way or another. If you cannot take a bit of verbal abuse and corporal punishment, you are in the wrong place.  While I may enjoy levels of intimacy at times, I will not be your boyfriend.  There are other sites for finding those types of guys. This old troll will crawl back under his rock now! 

I found the start of this made a few changes... A partial list of subby duties we are looking for... - Able to laugh, giggle, roll eyes, face palm or any combination thereof to my horrible jokes and bad puns.- Have a personality and brain of her own and able to give an opinion, respectfully of course.- Help in my efforts and quest for world domination.- Be an appreciated, non-imaginary friend who just enjoys being around.- Have quirks and perhaps a bit of crazy in the right doses.- Puts up with snuggles while watching a movie-or any time.- Suck, but not in a bad way.- Put up with being protected and adored.- Be sweet and innocent but oh so dirty.- Can handle being used for sexual teasing and Sensual Domination.- Who cries sometimes when she’s happy- Is willing to do a strip tease to the song “Itsy Bitsy Spider” while doing all the motions.- Who appreciates that sometimes Master just needs physical release and you are there for that.- Suffer through a nice candle light meal full of conversation.- Enjoy new adventures.- Who celebrates Master’s enjoyment whether she is the source or not  - Understand, put up with and even enjoy a bit of sarcasm.- Will be slightly embarrassed when I open the door for her.- Enjoys getting dressed up, and dressed down for her Dom.- Can enjoy breakfast for dinner.- Able to stand having her neck kissed for no other reason then it was within reach. Oh there will be lots of service, duties, kinks and sex too, but We wanted to mention the really important things first. So if you still have an interest, send a message -- we'd enjoy talking to you.

 Things that excite Me in a slave Addiction Infatiuation Obsession Devotion Worship Providing Me Attention Sacrifice Restriction Whimpering Obesiance Surrender Dedication Persistence Patience UNREQUITED LOVE Come, darlings, step into Goddess' world.  Find your true self in My Control.  Be Amazed by Me.  Revolve yourself around Me.  

I'm so happy to be back on Collarspace. This is where it all started for me....about 10-ish years ago when I was just finding out about BDSM and really exploring my kinks (which is currently still evolving)...With that being said... being here is so nostalgic because I've met some amazing people here over the course of years. I'm especially excited to run into some old friends here. So a quick story time....years ago when I was here one of my friends from MIDDLE school found me on this site (not really sure HOW) but we had really good conversations and he talked about the way I use to treat him in middle school as far as being very bossy, dragging him around, TELLING him that he was my boyfriend made him KNOW that he was meant to be a sub/slave. It really put a lopt in perspective for me too because it showed me that this was in fact a n inherent part of my personality....to dominate...to take control...to be the boss...and it came to me so easily...so long short, I'm hoping that i run into this guy here again that would be amazingggg... either way I'm looking forward to the connections I foster this time around. 

"So into you" or why ob- ject -ification is not as flattering as some guys think it is The subject today will be centered around ob- ject -ification, and how lack of the right actions is getting in the way of what you want. Recently my day was spent prepping for Mom spending the night, which mostly meant me continuing to organize, clean and just generally improving the space in my sewing room, (the only real spare room) which has a futon, and most importantly, DOORS, so she can have privacy and quiet from my cats. Now, being ADD, I work better with music and company, so I put music on that she and I can both enjoy- a Pandora station based on the Doobie Brothers I started just for her. And being who I am, I tend to listen to lyrics, and then often find myself analyzing them. Usually, I'm specifically analyzing the relationship failings described in them. It doesn't always stop me enjoying the music, but sometimes I recognize the stalkery mindsets that filled our airwaves when I was young and impressionable. As were the guys who were listening. It's not surprising that we all grew up thinking these kinds of unhealthy behaviors and expectations were normal, and even romantic. Songs like Boston's "Let me take you home tonight," where a guy is explaining to a woman he's never actually met before that he's basically been stalking her and built a strong fantasy and expectations about who she is, and now he feels that she should absolutely feel both flattered, and obligated to have sex with him. "You must understand this, I've watched you for so long, that I feel I've known you, I know it can't be wrong," and goes on to say "I'm dreamin of your sweet love tonight, let me take you home tonight." So… he's been watching her for a long time without talking to her, decided who she was without ever having a single conversation, and, of course, imagining sex with her. A lot. And he tells her so, over and over and over. Let me do this thing I want. Let me do this thing I want. Let me do this thing because I want it. Because that's always what is really going on there. Always the focus and end focus. Nah... that's not creepy AT ALL. Geesh. Today, it was "So Into You" by Atlanta Rhythm Section. Different band, different song, same thought process - I saw you, I was attracted, I've decided who you must be, and I can't think about anything except sex with you - only this time, they seem to want to make it her fault. Now, at first, what struck me was "could not catch your eyes" and "stand here helplessly hoping you get into me." Which just makes me ask 'What did he actually try?' I end up envisioning Toothless in How to Train Your Dragon 2, dancing around like a lunatic and freaking out the of his affections. Let's hope it wasn't like that. But honestly, it sounds like he really didn't try much. He admits that he's 'standing helplessly' rather than walking across the room and saying hello. Which sounds a lot like complaints I've heard from guys before. "I don't know how to talk to women" and that's where it ends, rather than trying to solve that. I mean, there are classes, there are workshops, there is therapy, etc. There are options. Why would someone not even try to fix the thing that keeps them from finding companionship if they are stating that they want it? Passive is not a good look. Or as has been said "faint heart ne'er won fair lady." Unfortunately, the closer we look at the lyrics, the creepier it gets. All this woman did was walk into a room. Suddenly, he's obsessed. He "can't think of nothing else." He says "Love the things you do" when so far, all she's done so far was exist in the same room. She's "driving him crazy," "thinking about how it's going to be" and he's "Gonna love her all over, over and over." So he's not really thinking about getting to KNOW her. He's focused on this fantasy he has of who she is, and what he wants to do to her. She's a beautiful woman. But somehow, she's not really a person. I mean, he's impressed by her, and he wants something from her. But not enough to make the effort to interact with her as human being. So he's "helpless" and "driven crazy" and "captured" but is just standing around "hoping." Worst part is that I really do like the song. Musically, and I like his voice, and the moody, kinda slow jazz feel to it. Shame about the message. I do get it - sometimes you see someone who just looks so cool it's hard to figure out how to approach so that they will be as impressed by you as you are by them. I was told that I'm intimidating... decades before I knew that Dominant was a thing. And the problem isn't that he thinks she's beautiful with "voodoo in the vibe." It's that he's turning that into something SHE's doing - "driving him crazy," and turning his insecurity into "helpless." And the entire thing is portrayed as flattering, and romantic, and a compliment to her. Because isn't that what women are supposed to want? For men to desire them? For her beauty to give her power somehow? For her appearance to add to her value to men? Because "The Male Gaze" is always supposed to be a woman's focus. And what a man feels when gazing is her responsibility. And anything a man might do because of that feeling when gazing at her is her fault. And that is the message. In song after song. "I saw you, I had a feeling, I have a want, I am thinking about you, I am having lots of thoughts about you, I'm having a fantacy about you, I'm deciding that the fantacy is a true representation of who you are, so now I'm building hopes, and I'm building expectations, and now I'm going to approach you , and you should share all my fantacies and fullfil the hopes and expecations rather than view me as some total stranger who's making weird sexual demands." (We won't even START discussing murder ballads. That came up recently too...) That is the message young guys get when they are first thinking about asking girls on a date. That this is how it happens. That this is normal. So when they do it, they are shocked and confused by the girl's reaction. Then again, young girls get this too, so plenty of times when a guy is inappropriate, before they've learned to be afraid of guys and their reaction to rejection, they belive they are supposed to be flattered that a guy is paying attention to them. Even if she doesn't like him, having a guy want you is important, a measure of your value as a woman. So rather than seeing a red flag for later, more aggressive poor behavior, they see it through the lens of "romance." They feel pretty and special and don't recognize healthy behavior when they see it elsewhere because this is how it happens, and what is normal. It's right up there with "he must like you if he punched you" in grade school turning into "he didnt mean it, you know he loves you" later when he beats her bloody later in life. Hell, I literally had this just yesterday. "Hello beautiful, I’ve always wanted to meet you , I love that hair , your so beautiful, I’m in (my town) until Jan 30th Love spoil you and finally get to actually meet you , I only been dreaming for years to do some sissy sessions with you " Never read a single line of my profile in all those "years." So he literally only knows that I have a nice picture. I point that out. (It's a thing for me...you may have noticed.) He responds "I know I need proper training but I know you can teach me !" Because of course, that would be my goal - to spend time and a lot of energy giving someone what they want when they couldn't spend 5 minutes reading my profile. I point out that he STILL hasn't read it, or addressed my reply, and that it was kind of insulting.  He pushed on, though - "We can go get coffee or meet at a munch or anything your up for , I’m only here to next Sunday , but after we meet and greet , I know you would always enjoy my company"  Because obviously, women enjoy men who they feel have insulted them. Especially when it's the BDSM equivalent of a one night stand.  Yes, I blocked him. He obviously wasn't going to catch a clue, even when smacked with a clue-by-four, so there was no point letting him keep messaging me until he got nasty.  He told me I was beautiful, so it automatically followed in his mind that I would immediately want to be alone, up close and personal, providing him his desired gratification, in a session with him, a total stranger, on the first meeting. And that his idea of "spoil" would be the same as mine. Or "proper training." He belived knew me, what I'd want, what I enjoy from my company, etc, without having to read a word I wrote, because he'd looked at my picture and had a feeling and built a fantasy and then expecations. And that who I was beyond my face (and hair) didn't matter.  Because I was not a person to him.  I was an object he desired... a fetish vending machine into which he felt he had put the appropriate coinage - a compliment on my looks. And he wasn't going to be desueded from that with reality or actual human interaction.  This is the world women live in. This is what "The Male Gaze" actually means. If we are attractive, we have value, but not humanity. If we are not attractive, we have no value, and are dehumanized.  You'd think men who want to be Dominated would behave at least slightly different, show at least surface respect to a Dominant Woman, but on average, they don't. And yet, right now, in several groups, there are guys going on about how hard it is to find a Mistress, by guys with the same empty profiles and dick pic avatars and tons of 'do me' groups. The same complaints, the same confusion, the same helplessness and yet the same refusal to make the efforts that would make it possible for a Dominant Woman to want to interact with them.  They are standing helplessly... hoping... being driven crazy... not understanding why we aren't "getting into" them.

Unleash Your Desires Are you ready to explore the depths of your desires? Are you seeking a connection that transcends the ordinary? If so, this message is for you. Introducing an extraordinary chance for a woman who is self-assured and possesses a unique understanding of her own needs. I am looking for a submissive woman who craves a genuine and profound connection. In a lifestyle where a true connection is often elusive, I assure a safe and respectful relationship where your desires can be fully embraced. My foundation is built on trust, communication, and mutual consent. Imagine a relationship where your deepest fantasies can be openly expressed, without judgment or reservation. A sanctuary where your needs are cherished and your desires are honored. I am a compassionate and experienced Alpha, ready to embark on this journey with you. Together, we will explore the boundaries of pleasure and submission, unlocking new levels of intimacy and fulfillment. If you are a strong-willed woman who seeks a safe Dom who embraces your submissive desires, I invite you to contact me. Let us create an extraordinary connection, where trust and exploration intertwine.  Take a leap of faith and discover a world of fulfillment you never thought possible. Contact me today and begin your journey toward a profound connection.

Edit     So the looser of our little game is now in the position of being constantly aroused at the thought of so many folk seeing one of her pictures, and as she has no control over further posts. Its hard to tell which is arousing her more, the loss of control or folk seeing her pictures. So today we have a fresh picture to review, feedback welcome.

Don't give up my first journal. Hi I'm mistress muse and I am dominant to my wolf.  If there is one thing that being on the scene has taught me, it would be to never give up. I spent so long in fruitless vanilla relationships that although, true, filled with love and all the nice things that people claim to experience in these things it also carried with it a weight. It was like a brick in my chest, a wrong feeling, an alone feeling, a dark hopeless feeling, a sinking if you will. Which in a way was true I was drowning I was drowning in self doubt I was drowning in a sea of misunderstandings and depravity. The love I craved seemed so taboo it almost seemed impossible to obtain. I may have been looking in the wrong places but even kinky people I've known for years on the scene would often look baffled if I piped up some of my perversions. I then met someone I had known in a completely vanilla setting... So vanilla in fact even he hadn't really noticed me before... a friend who knew of his kinks thought we would be quite suited. Looking back now I find it amusing that both him and I scoffed at the idea but Kinky curiosity got the better of us. There was this feeling everytime we spoke... A feeling of understanding... A good feeling... A weightless feeling soon combined with a feeling of want. I wanted this man... I was fucking getting him. On the scene for years he has been known as z3ro (zero) but ladies gents and pets let me tell you this he is anything but a zero so from the very beginning I have refused to use this name for him. He became my Wølf, my alpha bitch, my sub, my friend, my mirror and my PARTNER. I have used this term quite freely in the past but with him it's different. He is my partner in crime he is my play partner he is my intellectual chewing gum. He turns my head and the way my brain works. I never thought it was possible to find someone to just get me and be able to match my sadistic evil streak. To find someone on the same interlectual level as me. For me to find someone just as twisted as me. For this I am grateful and this is why my wisdom(me) for the day is this.... JUST DON'T GIVE UP

  This is, I think, my first Journal Entry. I have written responses to several profiles posted by women on this site.  I have never included a "laundry list of activities", but rather simply presented myself as a submissive male in search of LTR with a lady who desires to take the lead in a relationship. I have had little luck with this approach, having actually met 2 women, one of which judged me too old (76 then) and still under 80 now.  I have read many profiles posted by dominant women here, not a few of which express frustration about subs "who want to top from the bottom" and a like number who seem to not like for sub men to say what they  want in the way of activities.  At the same time some women have an exhaustive "laundry list" of actiities in which they are interested, Recently, I responded to such a profile and before doing so, I printed a 3 or 4 page laundry list of activites from the lady's laundry list.  I responded by giving information about my knowledge, inteest, experience, like or dislike, or opinion of each item on the list.  Because CS system doesnt seem to like really long responses to profiles, I broke it down in 4 or 5 diffeent messages.  To my surprise, the lady read them all, whch is the opposite of my experience with most of my other responses.  She sent me a not telling me she liked the  detailed responses to her laundry list, even thanked me for it.  Of coursel I was rejected, but it was better than beilng ignored. So, tell me please, ladies, do you really want such detailed responses to you profiles on the first contact?  Or, is the problem more about being between 76 and 80, is just too old to begin with?? with respect, dachastesub

WARNING:  POLITICAL RACIST SEXIST DEFAMATORY PROFANE STATEMENTS FOLLOW!   Keep OUR laws off of MY body. Or be prepared for US to start making laws for YOUR body. The only reason why it is not the law of this land that a woman may do with her body as she sees fit, is because MEN do not stand up for our rights as WOMEN.  Don’t play games with Me and tell Me you are all about respect for women and women’s rights and you LOVE AND WORSHIP women and then tell us we don’t have what if farking takes to govern our own bodies!  Bloody hypocrites! Don’t tell Me it is the politicians, women, men, or any other such thing which makes the law so.  It is because of YOU and your primitive mind set and ideologies which remove My Sovereignty over My body.  I’m an independent.  I am prolife and prochoice, when it makes sense and does not infringe on another free person’s rights.  You don’t get to choose what is right for My body.  You and the law HAVE NO BUSINESS IN OR ON MY CUNT!  God gave this Power to women.  We are made for it and with this God gave us the ability to deal with this Power – without Men.  Just like Men are given their own Power and the tools to appropriately deal with it. Now, if you continue to come after My body and My rights, be prepared for Me to come after you and your body parts. Any sexual or domestic offense committed by a male against a female, automatic SNIP SNIP!  You don’t want Me playing around with your cock and balls without consent?  Then STAY OFF OF MY DICK! Men competing in Olympics, or women’s sports.  This is a no brainer people.  We are a tad more civilized than legalizing and celebration of the beating of women.  Come on!

Some of us are born to serve.  I sought out alpha males online as a horny porn obsessed boy. One of those Daddy's began to use me and fill me after weeks of convincing and guidance as I ackwowledged i wanted to get fucked not fuck and that I like the idea of having my pussy filled. Daddy Mark suggested household suppiies to penetrate my hole.  I began to jerk off with my clit over my mouth. I came into my mouth. I ate my cum. Daddy Mark wanted to meet. After limited resistance Daddy Mark drove to my neighborhood late at night where I snuck out and met him in a quiet area a few blocks from my home. He directed me to wear only a tshirt and shorts and to approach his van. When he opened the door he told me to get in and remove my clothes and hand them to him. I did as told.  He filled both my holes. He fed me poppers as he showed me porn of twinks being bred.  I left knowing that I'd never do that again.  Two weeks later I did that again. This time in my youth baseball uniform. He filled me with my jock strap on.  "You're made to be a bottom bitch," Daddy Mark said. "You're the most eager bottom I've ever had." Meeting 3 saw me sink deeper. I told my parents I'd be spending a weekend at a friends house but instead rode with Daddy Mark to his house, where a sex swing, basement playroom and two Daddys waited to make me their bitch.  I've slowly accepted I want to be a slave. Owned, taken, shaped, used. I'm a sissy. Open to relcation, few limits, TPE and life free to be a slave.  

Among the minority within the class of submissives to whom slavehood is a vocation and slavery the ultimate goal, many are happily collared. Many, many more, however, are not. They are still waiting for their One, the master or mistress to whom they can give their lives completely, their submission totally, and their consent unconditionally. Commendable though this patience might be, the waiting can appear more than just a little frustrating at times. What does one do when every fibre of one's being is screaming for submission, while one has not yet found the person to whom such total submission seems right and natural? If you belong in this group, or if you are simply biding your time for any one of many perfectly legitimate reasons, there is in fact something you can do. You can spend the waiting time "preparing" yourself. Note the quotation marks, however. There is a distinction here that is vitally important to make. You are not doing this for "the One to come", you are doing it for you. Why? Because if you do it for "the One to come" you run the very real risk of ending up worshipping an idol of your own creation with which no dominant, no matter how good, stands a snowball's chance in hell of competing. Instead of preparing yourself for "the One to come", consider it improving your own marketability. Most of it is a matter of common sense. You probably already know what dominants generally tend to look for. Some of it you'll have down pat. Ignore that and get the other areas up to specs, then work on improving the whole. 

We are looking for female, male or couple who are submissive, are under 175 pounds, preferably around 160 pounds. Who wish to be dominated, fully controlled, mentored, guided and helped to be the right ones for us, with the very possibility of being so called owned by us. This female is somewhat sub but can also Dommme. She is open to also be  Dommed by either of the selected. The male is the head of the house and thus has the final say on all. You must be drug, disease free, non alcaholic and preferred no smoking but open to that. No tattoos, no piercings and very little body hair to non. We can shave you if needed. You should appear to be the every day clean cut, guy or girl and be so. If this fits you and you are serious, Note that we are looking for on going, long term relationship with us and spending all or most of your time day and night with us. You should live close to us or be able to travel. We can travel within shorte distances.

The artist Nas once said that life is a bitch and then you die. I agree wholeheartedly. That is why I try to live life to the fullest everyday. Several things occured over the past two years that have significantly changed my life. Im not writing this post to complain about those things but to reflect on how those things have influenced my choice to fulfill a long time fantasy that up until this point in my life seemed unrealistic.  Tomorrow, I have a realtor coming to my home to list it for sale. I will be selling my home and moving in with my submissive so that we can build our 1950s household. She lives in Philadelphia so this will not only be an opportunity to live out my fantasy but it will also be a fresh start in a new city. The circumstances that created this possibility were not desireable but I am happy that they pushed me towards fulfilling one of my long time fantasies.  Life is a bitch and then you die.....so you may as well make the best of it while you can.    

Some fellow in late Dec 2021 posted a Journal entry: "I see a still-surprising number of profiles which, in summary, go something like this:  'Fuck you in advance for wasting my time, because you are all fakes and losers, and also, I'm lonely and looking for someone, so please respond, but respond pretty fucking carefully.' " Rings true, but my own personal reaction to too many profiles (and more than a few journal entries on this site) can perhaps be summed up very briefly as: "What you say about others might well be true; but how you say it, speaks volumes -- about you." Gosh, that even rhymes, and with equal number of syllables.  On the positive side, it's a sort of Public Service Announcement, that "how it's said", alerting others (including even those of us looking just for friendship at this time) what style  to expect (sooner or later) if we make contact.

I wonder if there any service submissive guys right now who just enjoy being useful to a a Dominant Woman without expecting a list of actions in return. I also wonder if there are any polite adult gentlemen submissives left.  In his heart is he sad and needs glee, Seeking to be helpful to a Dominant Woman such as me, Drive together for meals out and joy, Where he craves to be my long term boy.  

A Masochist's Dream   She does not speak at first. She doesn't need to. The silence is the command.   I'm already trembling before the first touch, but it’s not fear — it's worship.   Her fingers are the storm before the pain, tracing the outlines of where I will break, where I want to break, where I need to break… just to be remade again beneath her will.   The first strike is a kiss I’ve waited my whole life for. It lands not only on skin, but on soul — and I open to it, gasping, grateful.   Every mark she leaves is a word written in a language only we speak: a dialect of fire and obedience. My moans are not protest — they’re prayers. My tears are not weakness — they’re offerings.   And when she stops — when her breath slows, when her eyes soften but her grip stays firm — I lie there undone, not broken… but finally whole.   Because in the ache, I feel seen. In the bruises, I feel known. And in the surrender, I am free.

Guys, women are not looking for disembodied body parts. Your abdomen alone in a mirror shot is NOT sexy. No matter how ripped, it's just a random body part. Posting random body parts just shows that you have not bothered to read or listen to anything women have ever said about what they want. We look for a PERSON. Not a body. Certainly not an isolated body part. Any body parts. Especially dicks. Body parts on their own without a personality attached are almost exclusively a GUY THING. No, posting a body part is not "full disclosure." We did not ASK for a body part. If that's your avatar, most likely any woman will just click past it. You're killing yourself just by choosing a bad pic instead of showing some personality. We aren't passing you by because you have a belly, we're passing you by because you seem to think that's the most important aspect of you. That would make us as shallow as you are. Once again, act like a whole person. Not a generic title for a nickname, a generic body part for a picture, and a generic request for what you've seen in porn as a relationship. Grow up.

I know this sounds harsh but due to all the players it has to be said... dont bother to message me if you are here for a quick hook up, mind games, players, people that have no idea what BDSM is and even ones that think you may know ...first I am in a monagamous relationship and it will stay that way. Ive been here for years. i know all the games and the attempts at control and topping from the bottom or pretending to be whatever to get what you need ...i am real and i have real friends. I also have great knowledge about bdsm in all ects and have experience. I am not seeking to partake in the lifestyle with anyone else other than who I am already in a relationship with. Im not here because i need anything other than just to be here. my reasons for being here have nothing to do with trying to be with anyone else. REAL convo is hard to find and most people pretend and as soon as they find out they cant get anything from me that they need they stop talking.   Im here im not leaving the site . I want to be here .    what really gets my attention is honesty and real ...no masks... just real honest open people who are not trying to get what they can out of another person with no care about them what so ever  ...    

  I am curious. I asked this question of several submissive men who responded to my ad; do you have a kinky resume?  This is exactly like a normal resume but instead details your kinky experience. I was told no; they did not have one.  Because my group is D/s oriented, we took on an Owner's Manual and Kinky Resume for our group.  Wow, the responses and excitement were awesome. As a group, we decided the work put into both of these items would help either side of the sash get to know their partners on a deeper level, and if triggers were set off, we each could handle them better.  This ramped up negotiations to a new level.  As one of the co-moderators for the event said, every car we own comes with an owner's manual, so why not one for us, like a car, we have moments when our "lights come on," or the shit hits the fan.  This is something I want to see. Everyone claims experience, but what classes are they taking to be good at XYZ?  What events do they attend, and so on.  What do you think? 

Cowards?  Dolts?  Flakes?  Predators?  Time wasters?  Inconsistent at best. Its weird to have people request a time for speaking, give you their phone number and then close their account before the appointed time.  Such odd behavior and it certainly gives one pause when engaging here.  Then there are those whom you have spoken with many times, shared video chat, Q & A, moving towards a meeting, only to - never contact you again once you request a meeting. You are not sincere and genuine. Where have all the cowboys gone - the one with social graces, honor, integrity?  There are a few here of course and they are greatly appreciated but the rest ...need relationship therapy. Thank GOD there are a few men here who are moving in the right direction!  I fear I would lose all hope if not for their persistence and welcome demeanors.

stranger things I am absolutely, undeniably always attracted to the most random male attributes!. My body betrays any hint of ladylike grace and elegance when these are near:  some seem reasonable; denote strength, virility, ability to provide & protect, etc. -Infuriatingly, my train of thought derails immediately when a Tall Gentleman with a Commanding presence… presents. -Still waters run deep.  a thoughtful Man that makes the most of His words.. Oh good gracious, words escape me! -Large hands make my mouth water. Really. It’s a bit embarrassing actually. And for heavens sake, do Not point at me! My jaw drops. -Just don’t even get me started on a deep voicebc…. Well…. I’m a complete loss! Like a deer in headlights. And be still my heart if there’s the slightest hint of an accent?!😳. I just… oh dear These are characteristics of many a successful, beloved Leader! Totally ‘understandable’ right? But there are subtle nuances that make me especially attentive and forget what I was saying! -Like laugh lines. When a Huge Man is most comfortable with a Genuine Smile and wit, isn’t afraid to laugh loudly! I get this dorky smirk and stare unabashedly. -If He actually ‘gets’ my random 90s geekdom movie quotes or music lyrics.  I’m a goner. Princess Bride, Anamaniacs, Star Trek/Wars…. -when He Leads, Protaspects, Nurtures by nature a friend, employee, child, pet, good grief!  I just want to cuddle in like a tiny, lost bunny and nuzzle! -His preference is to connect and hold eye contact, with engaging conversation…. i can’t even. Just here, Take my Soul! -cargo pants. What’s with this one? As if he is ‘prepared’ at all times with some random macguyvery multi-tool to save the day?!  Swoon. (Utterly Humiliating!) -random facts and extrapolation that we can mull and discuss, I love to learn from Him!. I don’t know how I made it through academia without becoming a literal teacher’s pet?! -mechanically inclined- if He can fix things instead of treating every dang thing in life as disposable….Maybe there’s hope??? Stranger things have happened! (copied from my journal!)

A fantasy of mine..."My internal world is rich with wicked fantasies, and I know the feeling of a tortured existence when those fantasies and desires are not fulfilled. If you’re looking for a girl who is willing and eager to open herself up to your darkest desires and most erotic dreams, then please read further.  Have you ever had a desire to see an eager, willing thing serve your every whim? Or fantasised about being tied up and chastised, told you’re a naughty boy whilst your mistress tells you just how she ought to punish you? Or perhaps you may have thought about a night out for some discreet public play, toy in you or your partner whilst the other holds the remote? Whatever your fantasy, I’d like to make it a reality.  I derive immense enjoyment from fulfilling another’s needs and desires, thus, their interests become my own. So, if you are yet to take that first step into the delicious world of sex and needing a friendly smile and eager attitude to illuminate the path, have a fantasy that you are dying to explore, or have an interest in exploring various kinks to discern what tickles your tail feather, I’m offering my body and oh-so excited mind to bring those desires to fruition.  So boys and girls, if you feel our interest may align please message me for, what could be, a wild and delicious ride. "

test results... I don't necessarily agree with all of these amounts though. Updated March 2022 == Results from bdsmtest.org ==100% Rigger100% Sadist100% Owner100% Master/Mistress94% Dominant93% Switch90% Non-monogamist90% Primal (Hunter)83% Pet81% Brat tamer71% Experimentalist67% Primal (Prey)63% Voyeur62% Degrader61% Rope bunny57% Submissive47% Masochist37% Brat14% Exhibitionist11% Daddy/Mommy2% Vanilla0% Boy/Girl0% Degradee0% Slave0% Ageplayer

Just want to make a few things clear about n my profile: S eeking only a heterosexual, monogamously-minded male. Mild feminization is a great tool to humiliate a male sub.  But I am seeking a male, not a man seeking to be a girl or woman. (Nothing wrong with that, just not for me.)   You also don't have to be a "manly man" for me to find you appealing. 😉  If you require a lot of online messaging before you feel safe talking by phone, I don't want to waste your time or mine because I would rather hear the inflections in your voice than see your words on a flat screen.  Be both should be cautious because there are scammers on both sides.  But I want to voice verify that you are not a minor or in another country before we discuss details of out proclivities. I am absolutely NOT interested in a man who is married or in a serious relationship, no matter what your situation.  Please close your doors before knocking on mine .  Time is precious.  Let's NOT waste even a second of it if there isn't a chance from the get go because we aren't a match. 

It will be OK Two drifting people on different ways,Living limited lives from distant days.Surrounded by many, yet still alone,Both in houses, but neither at home.A chance encounter - light, no more -Stirred something deep in each to the core.Old memories woke, a future appeared,New beginnings whispered where caution had steered.One stepped forward, the other stepped back,Too much to carry, too much to track.Too deep for one heart to sustain,And early joy gave way to pain.Like moths to flame they circled still,Neither yet ready for the bitter pill.Until at last he spoke his truths,Releasing both back to their roots.They dared to dream - and will again -Just not together.That much is plain.

So since I'm starting to look again for someone to bring into my dynamic i've had a few questions and statements as to why I am the way I am. I have PTSD for a few reasons. 1 relates to this lifestyle we arranged a hotel meet when the Mrs was still alive. We met what we thought was one person in a hotel room. It turned out it was an ambush and 2 other men were hiding in the toilet. I was beaten unconcious and they took turns on the wife without lube or protection. Then when I was out and they had finished with her they went to work on me. I was left with internal bleeding, left for dead and issues with my backside shall we say. So if I'm asking for patience or seem to take a step back, it probably has nothing to do with you as I do have flashbacks every now and again. If we do arrange a meet it would be somewhere safe first and there will be safe words and someone around just making sure everything goes ok, they will leave when I feel comfortable. If it ever does go to a 24/7 or prolonged meets, you may notice I do wake up in night terrors, it is to do with the above. I'd ask until I fully wake up just let me come around naturally.

Who are You? Ladies,   Do not be afraid to call it out:  Manipulation-- Had a conversation with another dominant.  We're both romantic and,sapiosexual.  In the morning he wishedme "good morning." The next thing I knew, he wrote ,"if thats all it meant to you"   Yeah, that totally manipulative.  We had a conversation.  You didn't cross the Mason Dixon and save me from slavery.  Fantasy conversation: Homeboy starting talking about his cruise and staying a few day to spend time with me.   Who are you and what are you talking about about? Drive Thru Order: I want a woman to peg me.  (Has no clue who you are,but thinks you're a menu item.) There are a few ways to respond.  1) This isn't a drive thru.  Otherwise, you'd be  paying for your Happy Meal at window 2.  2) People in Hell want ice water.  Are you volunteering?. Home delivery:  Dude asked if I traveled to Vegas. "Yes, I travel, but I don't deliver.  I'm not pizza.  Call Uber Eats for front door delivery.      

== Results from bdsmtest.org ==100% Rope bunny100% Masochist98% Submissive82% Boy/Girl70% Experimentalist69% Brat66% Non-monogamist65% Exhibitionist64% Ageplayer64% Slave62% Primal (Prey)56% Degradee41% Voyeur33% Vanilla19% Pet

It appears part of our profile is missing our instructions for applying to be our slave so here is the first step again   TO BE CONSIDERED THE FIRST STEP IS TO GIVE A LITTLE INFORMATION ABOUT YOURSELF SO ANSWER THE FOLLOWING   WHAT PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE DO YOU HAVE IN THE LIFESTYLE? WHAT SKILLS DO YOU HAVE TO BRING TO THE HOUSEHOLD? ARE YOU EMPLOYED? IF NOT YOU WILL GET A JOB. DO YOU HAVE ANY HEALTH ISSUES?  WHAT ARE YOUR VANILLA INTERESTS? WHAT ARE YOUR KINKS? DO YOU HAVE AN ISSUE WITH SERVING IN A POLY HOUSE WITH MULTIPLE SLAVES BOTH FEMALE AND MALE?  DO YOU HAVE ANY LEGAL ISSUES TO SORT OUT?  ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS AND ONCE YOU DO WE WILL GO FROM THERE ANSWERING NONE TO Q1 OR YES TO Q4 DOES NOT HINDER YOUR ABILITY TO BE OUR SLAVE IT IS JUST THINGS WE NEED TO KNOW FOR YOUR SAFETY AND WELLBEING 

so i must tell everyone i have found a wonderful Mistress.  She is stern, focused, reasonable, and a great trainer.  since i have been with Mistress, she and her assistant have seen me naked more time than i could hope for.  Mistress has done all of the following to me, each one is the first time the person has ever experienced this:  anal play with plugs, masterbating (2X) in front of Mistress and her assistant while assistant beat my balls and cock, trying on female outfits with wig, hose, apron, shoes, etc.  but the one thing Mistress did which i was not ready for, but the envelope was pushed, and i complied, was SUCKING ON A REAL COCK.  what an experience.  i enjoyed it as my Mistress was my teacher.  having Mistress see my me bob up and down, taking that massive cock in my mouth, kissing his ball sac, and fondling his balls while sucking.  he did not cum, which was too bad, but my Mistress will find anotheri am sure of it. so submissives, if you want a Mistress which will respect and train you come to my Mistress.  she is for real but you need to be also.

Well life is different. After 12 years of being owned almost 1 year being Free and looking to step foot back into things again. I am looking to start with a play partner or so and work my way up. Vetting will be a must. I am not going to just drop to my knees at first meeting we need to get to know boundaries limits likes dislikes each other etc. Play parties with local hosts and munches can and will be enjoyed. why things failed from my perspective. Rose colored glasses came off when I was the one putting 99% of the effort into the relationship. I stayed faithful throughout but he cheated. He stopped putting effort in first as a dom then as a partner yet still married him. I was trying to hold onto the spark we had in the begining and the man I saw so full of potential. I cooked I cleaned I provided I got forgotten. No birthday christmas mothers day nothing. I had to on many occasions buy my own presents. Even when he picked them I then had to pay for them (we were both working) I made his dreams come true he wanted to own this kind of vehicle sure thing. a motorcycle here got ya set up for one. Hey you need a motorcycle club to join I networked and found one that I thought he would mesh with. I got the day after christmas chocolate covered cherries on clearance and the only kind i didnt like (theres 2 major kinds i didnt want the creme ones) I wanted to be touched loved fucked beaten and i got ehh nothing. I made him a little jealous by going to a kink party without and he came the next one but the flogging just didnt have his heart in it and i could tell. My platonic play partner did a better job than my spouse. He had Poly Pride tattoeed on his person so I asked to find a girlfriend and he blew his stack at me screaming calling me all sorts of names and even by his ex wifes name. Gaslight me about his sexuality that he had told me years ago he was ace (nope never said that) Tried to gaslight me on that argument and broke some of my boundaries that night. I asked him to go to therapy and find couples therapy. He went a couple times then quit. I tried to hold on hope until my kid said mom your not happy dont wait for me to graduate go be happy. So Now thats what I am.  

Nothing has really been right.  Though realistic to know that can't provide.  Hence would only really fit into relationships that are LTR resulting in ownership or some kind.  Its like men who get married that stay home as the so called house husbands.  Not really a person who likes to travel.  Female Led Relationships are even in the Manga that will cover or gravitate towards.  Around 2K thought things might work out with Miss Kriss. Though she lapsed into cocaine problem again causint schisms or issues. Really it was wanting to pierce or hang from hooks or things that don't really work with somebody having Anemia. Finding somebody whose interests are realistic is probably best.  Really the type of person who will gravitate towards whta the other person is into. Feet was something that noticed at an early age where would not be into Heels or Boots or Stockings in the least. Though as got older Shoes or Boots especially certain types could be interesting if somebody is into that.  So can't really enjoy anything unless the other person is.  Its like feed on that energy.  Not into anything related to food or feeces hehe.  Puking or Piercing among other things I probably listed in the profile. Really don't think things will work out for me or most in life.  Those who have wealth really are who should be owning people instead of finding somebody to provide.  As its a clear difference in class or standing.  Glad they least brought back journlas. Wish LittleReaper would give me another chance to speak to again.  Things were pretty complicated was having issues with medication reaction and phone ;).

this site doesn't want me to be great. it keeps cutting off my piece i'm trying to share and it's not even as lengthy as other works i've written. oh well, can't stop won't stop. is the 5th upload attempt the charm instead of the 3rd? let's see if it cuts it off in this format.   Wavy Baby: Sirenade, The Lullaby of Power, Love, and Connection this song is excellence. it provides nuturing in such a cool and curated vibe. it's an updated lullaby in a song. it's a shh shh shh whisper hug in an art deco haute couture framework. this song could be so many versions. it could be a connection to spirit and the water goddesses since it is sirenade...serenade as a siren.....it could be a song for women connection to other women. but my focus here is always about the power dynamic. in that context i hear it in two ways..it could be the submissive woman singing to the man. in the first part...it could be then the man reciprocating in the other half after the mermaid season breakdown. it could be a segment i don't talk about often due to my complete inexperience of being able to attempt this to happen for me but what exists, the daddy through the dominant woman...be it a more butch or masculine or gender fluid et all woman....or a femme woman...because similar to submissive daddy men, the feminine presenting and aligned woman that is a daddy is often overlooked...but they have and do exist for long periods of time as well.... i feel contextually given the singer is a woman it makes more sense for it to be sung for the submissive woman straight up from the dominant daddy woman's perspective in that relationship. but i feel all those apply. her cover says love is war and i've experienced that. but something in me knows it doesn't have to be...and while not getting there can be emotionally, mentally, spiritually hard..the actions of avoiding it being a war are quite easy. be ready to burn everything and anything that doesn't serve your highest good for the good of the third energy, the relationship. burn like a phoenix, shinier, brighter, more you, and more elevated. over and over between the dance of you and your beloved. claim them and hold on for the ride knowing your life partner is there along with you birthing this new you this new union.....the rollercoaster inside will eventually subside and when you don't make love war, you always have your emotional/mental/spiritual/sexual/physical/financial partner there with you step by step into the challenges of life by you. i see and have only experienced what happens when the other person can't go through the fire. and i have experienced only the love is war. but i see it in others all around me online, offline, before social media, after social media. love doesn't have to be war if both parties or if polyamorous all parties don't let it. "Wavy, baby Baby, baby, baby Yeah" iamddb says, 'urban jazz'...but it sounds vocally like 'harbinger'...and that mishear nuance the way she pronounces it adds another layer to this chicly crafted lullaby. "har·bin·ger/ˈhärbənjər/nounnoun: harbinger; plural noun: harbingers a person or thing that announces or signals the approach of another."witch hazels are the harbingers of spring"Similar:heraldsignindicatorindicationsignalpreludeportentomenauguryforewarningpresageannouncerforerunnerprecursormessengerusheravant-courierforetoken ›