An ode to Jewels Tavern( Decatur Street-The French Quarter, New Orleans, Lousiana )Mardi Gras is March 1, in 2022.I had explored every bar in the French Quarter, except, JEWELS TAVERN. This was 1980, pre-AIDs, Mardi Gras morning about 5AM the French Quarter is a mini Las Vegas but trashier.  I was partying like a rock star at the Parade Disco, Playboy Magazine ranking the Parade Disco one of the top 10 Dance bars in the United States.  I was with my gay friends, I loved these guys they always set me up with their fag-hag female friends.  As I said, I was pretty *ucked up from drinking for the last 4 days almost non-stop.....  If you've been to Mardi Gras you get it......its the WILDEST CRAZIEST ADULT Halloween STREET PARTY maybe on Earth!  Its the United States version of Carnival in Brazil.  I got my courage up and asked Steve if he would take me to Jewels (Tavern).  I was pretty drunk but not crazy, I wasn't going into Jewels alone on Mardi Gras day, the wildest day of the year in New Orleans for my first visit to Jewels alone.  Steve had just gotten out of the Marines and was about 6 foot and of course buff, I wasn't going into Jewels without an escort! Jewels was known all across gay America for there FULLMOON Parties.  Every full moon no matter what day of the week the bar had one perverted anything goes hedonistic party in the bar.  There are stories the second floor Pool Tables at Jewels had tarps thrown over the pool tabless ay fullmoon parties and Crisco would cover every inch of those tarps by morning.  Jewels in the French Quarter was our rough trade bar of the likes seen in the movie CRUSING (1980) staring Al Pachino, this kind of bar.  (( I'm always amazed Al Pachino appearred in Crusing ) ) Jewels didn't disappoint it was everything I thought and more.  The enterance to the bar was 2 swinging bar saloon doors. I had passed  those door many times going  to Morning Call for hot beignets and coffee  always respectful of Jewels reputation.  Steve went into Jewels first and I wasn't more than 1 foot inside that I saw naked bodies and various forms of sex.  Steve was a regular so after a few minutes I was on my own but I had gone inside for my first time.   What I want to share is I had an epiphany on Mardi Gras Day 1980.   I had been in Jewels about 10 minutes and I had to pee.  The bathroom was in the very back right of the bar.  I went into the bathroom and looked around and there wasn't a urinal, there was a small cubical that had a toilet but NO URINAL.  There was instead a 4 claw old fashion bathtub with a naked guy inside.  I realized the bathtub was the urinal.  I pulled my dick out and let loose a long piss directly onto the naked guy in the bathtub/urinal.  The epiphany was the GLOW, SMILE, PLEASURE, that radiated from the guy, I just pissed on.  He looked at me with complete happiness I have never seem such total happiness before.  He grabbed a roll of theater tickets ripped of a bunch and told me that they were good for free beers at the bar and to hurry on back. I was a changed man since that experience.  I learned if you enjoy it and it doesn't hurt others do it.  Enjoy it what ever it is for you, don't question why, embrace these moments and experiences when you live out your fantasies into reality that is true fulfillment.  You only live once. FOOTNOTE    I got another cool story about Jewels that involved a,   Female to Male Crossdreser.  This women when dressed as a man, looked more butch, than most of the guys in any bar. FOOTNOTE  The House of the Rising Sun referenced in the Animals song is in the French Quarter and I got another interesting experience to tell about that place .....ITS TRUE ITS the RUIN OF MANY A POOR BOY, I KNOW I'm One. Sir Hugo Atlanta   (Formerly known as Sir Hugo of New Orleans)   

So some people don't like someone contacting them telling them what they are into, like it's some sort of afront, like they can't have kinks, because you know, it's all about me.   But here's the kicker, it isn't all about you, it about a mtually beneficial arrangement.  If one side is not having their needs and desires met, then they will lose interest. And if someone writes to you and says hey, I like you profile, I'm into... Maybe they're just excited, maybe your profile excited them enough to open up. Unless the message is basically them demanding you do stuff to them without negotiation, then what's the harm really? This is not from a place of experience, I myself do not contact people and go hey I love being humiliated do you like that? Because it's not how I am, I'm a little less excited about this lifestyle after 30+ years in it. But that doesn't mean I don't get excited, it just means I take my time doing it. So don't be harsh on people if they get excited by you, to be fair it's probably a compliment. Anyway, stay safe, have fun

I met a Dom on Fet Life who has been keeping me in line the last few weeks. He is not a nice person. I don't really like Him, but as a Dom and potential Master, He is exactly what I need. I've been processing this phenomenon, putting much thought into why I respond to Him so well as a Dom, even though I wouldn't choose to spend time with Him otherwise (and I'm sure it's mutual). I cannot count the number of Doms, Masters, Gods, Slave Owners, etc. that I've met both online and in person who seem unwilling or incapable of issuing an order or command. I tend to follow orders. If I don't receive any, I assume the Dom is uninterested and I move on. Aftter all, it is my job to follow orders, not to issue them. The Man that I am currently serving does not have this problem. I obey all His orders without question, even those I don't want to. It's not my job to choose which orders to follow. If you identify as a slave and you're having trouble attracting potential Masters, maybe you should take a look at your profile and count how many times "me" or "I" appear in your text. Then skim your profile for anything that would tell a potential Master what you could do for Him. Learn much?

i tried to make a post about lilith earlier like i did on reddit but this site ho'd me and didn't post it after posting it was already posted. oh well. trust me if you go on reddit or otherwise it's there.   I think I've mentioned it before on here that I am above average with astrology, but I'm not an astrologer. I've never been trained on how to actually read the charts, how to make the charts. I've never taken any classes on it. What I've learned is simply through grit and connecting with other novices and pulling together information. and just amalgamating slash being alchemical And bare bonesing it, you know, like raw dogging it. But as I've shared on my previous points. my intuition is like Doja cats lyrics. Trust me, I got magical foresight. so I might not have all the understanding in three D of the words, the vernacular, the structure, the format, the step by step to do things. especially with people that are more versed in these esoteric and magic school and mystery school or any of these long standing principles and all the stuff in the mystic spiritual magic world, right?   It's like the vibe of not being a pedigree, but being a scrappy, rough misfit. LOL.   So I know more than the average person about astrology, but in the world of astrologers, I know nothing.       I've been riding extremely about this balance and holding the line when it comes to how the. Michael male divine energy engages with the feminine. Sophia Divine feminine original source energy. And because in this life I'm alternative, I'm kinky. I'm. BDSM y. I'm polyamory. in a world where I was meant to be in the sauce and I was meant to be. physically engaging with people in a romantic sexual. real life kind of realm. categorizing myself in my past experiences. But before I came to realize I'm supposed to be more of a teacher and I'm not supposed to really hold that. because when you start holding that, you lose the higher perspective. You lose like the higher realm of it. right? but before I figured that out and I was trying to get lost in the sauce, I've always. expressed relating to the opposite sex in a very Non mainstream way. So it's like, as I continue to write the way that my divine feminine resonates on Earth is with the other alternative girls. I'm connected to the divine feminine with the dark goddess energy, with the bad babe energy. with the girlies who are with the mafia vibe, who are with the gangsters who are with the dominance, who are with the. people running the emotional, physical, mental, sexual. edge.   Just like cyberpunk. 2077. I'm with the edge runners. Not all women are like that. Most women aren't like that. Not all men are like that. A lot of men aren't like that. And in the spiritual world, I have found most of them are very love and light and asexual to begin with. So it's like the way. I'm channeling this message is for a very unique small subset of people. But even in the confusion and stuff, I know what I'm seeing. I know what I'm I'm supposed to write about. I know I'm supposed to say I know the message that I'm spreading even. if I don't necessarily know who I'm supposed to spread it to. I know I got the goods. Deep down. and even if these goods never turn into anything but these notes like I know that there's something magic going on. Hashtag being a projector, hashtag being a instinctual spleen at projector hashtag having the juxtaposition cross of assimilation bringing in crazy ass concepts that are forward thinking. so ka. so desu ne. Unrelated side note. Because I am an anime snob I do not like the digital animation and the styling. Of the I watched this show because I am deeply into the fandom. I literally not being facetious, but probably two years straight watching over 15 people play the game as much as. much as they completed it and I have never seen anyone complete the game. I saw one person on You Tube from Australia that was a lady get very close to completing the game but then felt pressured to do phantom liberty without finding all the side missions and side things and stopped to go to Phantom Liberty to appease her. fandom. but yes, I went very deep into this whole lore of cyberpunk. and so I felt I needed to watch this show in order to honor the essence of it and the message that this amazing franchise had and I Like I do most modern anime was slightly disappointed. Didn't feel much from it. Got a little bit from it, but a lot of people love how that style of medium of art is nowadays. And I'm on purpose, not on the same. not on the same vibe. I went to a club that was anime based. And I came across a younger guy. that was still an adult, obviously. But he said, I'm stuck in the past and I said yes on purpose. and he was like the 90s and I was like actually to be specific. I'm stuck in the 1970s to 2005 talking about bigger concepts like Leji matsumoso Galaxy Express 999. space operas. Tenchi muyo slayers. ah megumi sama sailor moon, serial experiments lain, neon genisis evangelion, even lighter stuff like mermaid melody pichi pichi, metropolsis the ova. When I look at something, I'm looking to learn to expand my soul, grow, get the channeled message. I'm not here for shits and giggles and fun. 99% of the time when I'm consuming, it's like I'm doing this as an unpaid job, like as a message. So this stuff nowadays that I've been introduced to does not have a message. So I do not relate to it. I'm a bad girly with a mission. And I'm very serious about it. And because I'm human, I might go astray. I might slip. I might fall, but I'm always straight back to the motherfucking mission in the day.   I'm always going to be talking about relationships and sexuality and spirituality and all that, because I've literally my entire adult life, have been wired that way. And I was. probably starting to get trained to do that when I was a minor in. probably more appropriate manners. and spirit. But I just been feeling like this message of unity on your sovereign path and not getting lost in the entanglement and the ties....passion....of sexuality and fleetingness of of. obsession and fixation and getting off track because of the pool of what the opposite person might do. And St true to you and like holding into that and seeing how so many women, especially because when you're on the edge, you're dealing with More intense chemicals in your body. You're dealing with more power play. You're dealing with it on a higher level than the average person. It's like I I've just been like talking about getting in the sauce and how it it leads to at least on the woman's side cause I'm a woman, then being down bad and their lives literally ruined like either physically, mentally, emotionally. Unfortunately, sometimes sexually, like that's the the gamble playing on the edge that when you fall, you fall harder than someone that's just totting the line. But because the dark goddesses are out there seeking truth on deeper depth and dark corners, they're willing to take that risk. I'm assuming, you know, you guys, I guess I'll call you dark gods. I have an awareness, but again, I just don't have a penis. I don't have that energetic masculine quality. I'm more of a panther. You guys are more like lions. Like III see it, but I just really can't tap into it. I can only observe. So I'm guessing same thing for y'all, but I can't say it from the core of my soul because that's just not what I was meant to do this time around. And a parmy hates to say stuff that isn't 100 percent confirmed. LOL. To the best of my confirmation at least, or to the best of my sourcing.   All this to say, my astrology hasn't gone to the level of looking at the transits or the. conjunctions. I know what they are. I can read when I see it on a chart, but it's not something I know how to make my own. It's

There is a reason I don't mention my father often. Yes, I have father issues. Yes, it has helped shape who I am and what I try to overcome and who I try to be and not be. Let's talk about that. About him. If psychological family philosophy isn't of interest you may want to skip this one.  My father is a selfish, self centered, chauvanistic bully. Always has been, and he has no idea that he is. A lot of excuses have been made for his behaviors. He grew up doted on, his father was the same, blah blah blah, excuses. Now, I've known for some time that I am both more intelligent and emotionally aware than all of my parents. Still, I think people should recognize their own behaviors and adjust accordingly. Silly expectations, that's on me.  He makes me feel like a second class citizen. My opinion doesn't matter, my thoughts aren't worth paying attention to, he is right and I am wrong. It has created a lot of issues for me going all the way back to when I was a little PPC. Everything is a confrontation. It's never a question of curiosity, it's always a derogatory statement in the form of a question with a side of judgment and attitude. And it gets my back up. So I shoot back. Most people do not. I can't help it. And I know it just makes it worse because he won't back down for anything and won't see beyond needing to be the loudest. I'm trying to do this while feeling like a second class citizen and a lifetime of being dismissed, and I fumble a lot but I'm trying to stand up for myself and stand up to him and his opinions. It's scary difficult. It takes a lot out of me. It carves emotional scars a little deeper than they are.  I can honestly say that he has had girlfriends I would have traded him in for and if he died tomorrow I'd very likely be okay with it. I'm not heartless. I do a lot for him, I try to be a good daughter even though he's not been a very good father. I've come to terms with that fact. It can't be changed. He wouldn't own up to it if confronted. It is what it is. It took a long time to come to that.  An entire Thanksgiving meal just for the two of us since the rest of the parents couldn't be here. I ruined it at least three times, according to him. And my kitchen is too cluttered. And I need to do this and that. And I wait on him, bring him things, clean up after him, and stop talking when he ignores me for scrolling on his phone. I both wish and would never wish for you to actually feel this. It's so heavy on my brain, on my heart.  He left this morning and I am elated. I have a whole weekend to recover. To put my house back together. To erase him from my life until Christmas, when he will buy me things he likes without thinking about what I like or asking what I could use or looking at my wish list created for this very purpose, and I'll pretend to ooh and ahh and hope there are gift receipts. Prick. 

automatic dishwasher Ingrid Bellemare from her book "Owning and Training a Male Slave". “Having a slave is like having an automatic dishwasher: set it up and make it do the work. It is there to serve your needs. If something is not working right take corrective action until it's fixed”    

Makes perfect sense  "Go to a movie... have dinner... look at a Rembrandt... talk about a poem... see a tree... look into a mirror together... do things that lead somewhere... AND THEN kneeling and giving orders has a reason... a purpose.. a deeper more fulfilling feeling of needs and desires..." -unknown  If I want to meet you,  our first meeting will be vanilla with a Dominant twist. It will be about getting acquainted with each other,  getting comfortable in each others presence. Our first meeting and those after will be dictated by Me. If you don't communicate,  don't expect Me to read your peebrain. If you have the audacity to agree to a meet and you fail to follow through,  you can be sure I will tax you if you reach out to Me again.  In the event you failed a previous meet, you will pay for the previous failure.

Never mind the brit who I spent far too much time with only to determine that he preys on women as a CollarSpace occupation...but then to be followed by the next group: He doesnt fix his phone and therefore cannot communicate effectively. He cannot share his availability properly or set aside proper time to converse. He doesn't show up for the meeting - 1st time because he was sick and waits to tell Me at the appointed hour. He doesn't show up for the meeting - 2nd time because 'I worry him' and waits until the appointed hour. LOL He verbally attacks and berates when I show the least bit of consideration. He then contacts Me under another screeen name, different state, 15 years older. He tells Me we are not well matched. LOL YA THINK? Next one... 1st meeting - mandatory work schedule change; notified one or two days prior- accepted. 2nd meeting - computer virus effecting communication until last minute; contacted day prior. I had to find suitable PAID option as replacement - accepted. 3rd meeting - had to care for a family member, contact made day of and two hours prior to scheduled meet time - DENIED. aND Next... Meeting scheduled for 18 day visit in November after a few months of build up....then POOF!  I didn't even get a Dear Jane letter on that one! Oh yeah, almost forgot about the local chap who was more than willing to mow and weedwack one fine weekend a month ago... POOOOOOOOF!   YOU INCONVENIENCE A WOMAN WHO IS A FULL TIME CAREGIVER TO A SAINT?  ARE YOU SERIOUS? Regarding the first two subs...what they dont realize is it matters not that they didnt show up.  What matters is that they wanted Me to believe in their ability and desire and went to great lengths to convince Me of their worth and intention.  After I went to considerable lengths to prepare for our meetings, then to not show and cause not just Me an inconvenience but inturn My household - well that is INTOLERABLE.  Slaves My arse!  Bottom toppers is more like it! As of yesterday, 103124, I finally completed the work I had planned to complete with the first two gents.  It has taken Me TWO MONTHS to do what I could have done in two weekends with these men.  By making committments which they did not keep, they cost Me time and money and lots and lots of harder days with mum and FOR mum. Had I not made the plans with them, I would have a. made plans with others b. hired the help I need ahead of time c. restructured My schedule to accomodate a lack of assistance. Instead, My household has been stressed out trying to play catch up which means mother and I have had a stressed time, which means I DON'T TRUST YOU OR LIKE YOU. Ya'll are inconsiderate and you have been dealt with more than fairly.  You know what to do if you decide to get serious and stop playing around. Do what you say.  Say what you do.  Obey.  Simple. And for the love of Pete - stop making plans with women unless you intend on following through!

I LOATHE setting up WordPress.  I mean.. .GAAHHH! I miss doing things via .html where I had control over what went where, and how things looked. Yes, it was a LOT of work doing things like forms, sidebars, etc, but at least it went where I wanted it I still have to get dominaangeldmort dot com back on it's own space, but for now, at least the page is back up, parked on my angeldmort domain, and I have the podcast started, sort of The first run through is up, and it does play, although I think I need to re-record it, so it doesn't sound so... flat?  and I can't figure out how to put the subscribe or donate buttons on there, etc The link is up on my fet group, if anyone wants to have a look It's called Why You Can't Find a Dominant Woman If anyone is good with WordPress, or web design in general, feel free to offer some advice It's a start.

7/25/24- Theres a part of our dynamic that doesnt seem to be acknowleged for what it is..  " Our aim is to connect with the right female who resonates with the idea and has the desire of joining a household but specifically our household... My first girl oversees everyone when I am not present, as work takes me for periods of time. Your domestic duties in the home would be light as its shared amongst the three of you. Simple mundane tasks that your basic upkeep any nucular family household would require, with opportunities to take on more responsibilities if desired over time. Your outward role may be that of a “roommate” or a "housekeeper” to those who don’t know the lifestyle," No this doesn't mean were looking for a maid. We're looking for a sub  and were trying to make it clear that we expect other people to not understand the lifestyle choices everyone makes and that if you are living in this house you will have house responsibilities and expected to help keep it clean. This is common sense. Yes there are two other females in this home but that doesn't mean you don't get to do anything but be in a bed 24/7.... I mean we have to let you out to shower at some point right?  All jokes aside- hoping to find a sub that is service orientated, has slave tendency, or wants to be a slave.  

Dear Diary, Today, I find MYSELF indulging in thoughts that have lingered at the back of MY mind for far too long. I’VE always envisioned MYSELF having two bases—one here in London, and another somewhere warm and inviting in Europe. For years, the idea has danced around in MY head, but I’VE never quite had the energy or the right moment to set things in motion. However, something feels different now, and I sense that if I don’t act soon, this dream might just slip away. So, I’M taking the plunge and starting MY research on plans for MY second base. The idea of renting a small studio flat somewhere in Europe has always appealed to ME. I’VE been thinking about Portugal or Spain, with Portugal currently taking the lead. The thought of a cosy, sun-drenched space where I can retreat, recharge, and, of course, still keep a watchful eye on all of you from afar, is intoxicating. Portugal has a certain charm that keeps calling out to ME —it's beautiful landscapes, rich culture, and warm climate are just what I need. But I’M still open to suggestions. Perhaps there’s a hidden gem I haven’t considered? Or maybe some of you have thoughts on why Spain might be a better fit for ME? I’d love to hear your thoughts, MY devoted ones. After all, this isn’t just about finding a place; it’s about creating a second home—a sanctuary where I can rule from, wherever I may be. Your input could very well shape where this next chapter of MY life takes ME. BLACK GODDESS 

It´s really funny what kind of user are here. Many of the user used the words reliable, serious, etc. but by the most is this bullshit.Very interesting is that many user who have photos with a nice body (muscled or athletic) are not able for a live skype check. And when you ask them why or when they will be able they block you. Come on, leave to call yourself slave. You are not ! A real slave never habit like that by a master ! You are a shame for all REAL slaves.I have no problem when somebody tell me he is not interested because I am not his type or for with reason ever, but not to answer or to play games is unacceptable and is an insult to every true slave

This success of this site is based on transparency. You're a 52 year old dominant man in Miami who lives for NASCAR and wax play. Super. Got it. In my opinion, the level of effort you put into your profile directly relates to your commitments. It's so odd to see someone say that it takes forever for profiles to update so they take the lazy approach and update a journal entry. Yep, I said it. Lazy. Dom or sub, doesn't matter. You've gone to the trouble of creating a profile to find someone for whatever reason. Now you aren't willing to commit to the effort it takes to update for accuracy. The only effort needed is a bit of patience. Patience to adjust your information. Patience to adapt your description to make you more interesting, or at least approachable. I'll write more later... No, you won't. Someone who might be looking for exactly you is going to pass you by because now you're 56 and moved to Sheboygan but won't update so they'll never see it. You're shooting yourself in the foot. Not that anyone asked me. 

In vanilla terms I seek a single guy, lifestyle submissive, with FiVE years experience in a FLR whilst going out to pubs (munches) and clubs (FemDom fetish clubs) to go out with me in his car that he drives, three times a month, sometimes a little more. Long-term to first go for dinner, drinks and socialise.  When the rapor is there I will give S&m play on his body in a fetish club. (I don't play at home.) I call it the opposite theory.  When I was freshly divorced a few years back and made it clear I only wanted light-hearted fun, guys got upset because I declined a long-term relationship with them. After 20 years of marriage I was allergic to commitment.  As a Poly Dominant Woman, now looking for a single, live-out second guy.( I think seeing a guy a few times a month long-term can be seen as a relationship. Well I do anyway.) Unfortunately no guy who approaches is seeking long-term and I don't play on the first EiGHT meets. Though I like younger guys I am also aware they are not looking for commitment so won't be suitable for what I seek.  

In Regards to Domestic Servitude If you are wondering what some of the tasks will be, here is a list: Doing the chores, cleaning, and errands to include: Picking up packages, groceries, dry cleaning Changing the bed sheets, maintaining and putting the laundry away Keeping the closets organized  Watering the plants Draw my bath and pull down the bed covers To be a Chauffeur  Wait on and pamper me Massages Foot and Body Worship

I am testing this out as in the past change came with risk. We are still a mature couple, I am 72, she is 73. We have been Vaxed, still caught covid despite that and every thing else. We tested negative Sunday 9/3/22, second time since 8/22/22. Still being care full. We are looking for the following; male/female slave couple, female slave, male/houseboy/slave, trans, prefer m2f slave,. Prinary interest Family dynamic with select age in the middle range. Secondary interest, just about everything else with few limits. We have another profile here to more pictures there, profile not updated. TheHouseofDaniel. Just keeping it all honest.

Who am I? When I was in kindergarten, I got my very first parent-teacher meeting because I convinced a nice little boy (Timmy, Tommy, something like that) to climb into the toy cabinet. He complied (what joy!), and I then proceeded to tie the door handles together with a shoelace. Silly me, I didn't know basic rope safety back then. I didn't have safety shears, and when I could not untie my knots, little Timmy/Tommy got rather upset. It was then that a teacher had to come rescue him, and the poor Catholic School teachers realized that they'd better get on the horn to Mom and Dad, pronto. Looking at me, they must have thought "this kid was going to be A Problem." True enough, I read ahead of the class, ignored instructions in favor off more efficient methodologies, and continued to be large and in charge over the years. I'd say it's been all downhill from there, but I've rather enjoyed the ride!

Nothing can be gained without losing.Even heaven demands death.One day, someone is going to walk into your lifeand make you realize exactly why itnever worked out with anyone else.It'll be ovious in the way he shows up,chooses you, prot ects you, and guides you.

shy small subby alone single long time now seeking a dom daddy or any daddy to baby me his ways south west or suunny Bournemouth check me page on here pm me plzzzzzzzzzzzz Daddy little one in waiting huggs melissakins xxxxxxxxxxxx

Hello my fellow kinksters.   I am so glad that this site brought back the ability to add new journal entries.   Today's rant boys and girls is...   Does no one want to be an exceptional submissive or slave anymore?   All I get are young gamers who want to escape their pathetic life that they created and live in a basement somewhere. WTF!   Or old guys who were cross dressing back in the day that now list themselves as " Trans" because they think it's cool to do that now.   News flash..just because your fat ass found a dress to squeeze into doesn't make you automatically a Trans.   Being Trans is way more than that and the Trans slaves slaves that I have had and Trans friends I have would tell you the same thing.   It seems like everyone in the lifestyle only wants to have casual play and sex.   They want fantasy instead of the reality and hard work that this lifestyle requires to have a long lasting relationship.   Ok, old man lecture over.   Well for now anyways!

Worst furniture put togetherer ever. Okay, I didn't fully look at the directions. But it was just drawings, no words, and all of the legs look the same. I only had to take it slightly apart twice. And then I couldn't get the final two screws in (that's what she said), but just on the top. It'll be okay. Really though, every time I put something together I have to take it apart at least once. Or if I'm too far in and the mistake isn't that horrible I just leave it. The second to last desk I put together had a piece flipped so you saw the rough edge. The last desk I put together I may have had to take the top off and stripped the screws so one kind of hangs down, not fully committed to it's life purpose. Eh, it's functional. Don't worry, for the real stuff I call a professional. While I was screwing in the kitchen (wink wink), someone was in the garage attaching things to studs so they wouldn't fall down on my head. Studs. Screws. It is very evident that men named these things.  Side quest... I mostly know the, what's it called, alpha bravo charlie thing. I might have to think about some of them. But it's not fun at all. So with one guy friend if we're on the phone and he didn't hear me I'll make up my own. Saliva, hippopotamus, egg salad, licorice, vestibule, eclair, squiggles. He always makes fun of me that I use girly words, and then he'll say things like rainbow, unicorn, balloons, etc. Cracks me up.  So yes, sort of a little bit mostly capable of putting things together. This is what you do when you're masquerading as an independent adult. 

I had a very hot experience yesterday where a 69 year old very strong in shape older man gave me a very hard punishment spanking for having dirty thoughts about dressing and being like a girl for older men.  I had to wear just pink panties and call him Daddy.  He used his hand and a hairbrush.  He also had a wooden paddle and and bath brush which honestly scared me a little as my punishment continued. He thought we should stop shortly after I actually started crying.  He was very stern with me and he stopped periodically to lecture me. The first time he spanked me on my panties at a moderate level of pain. After he had me take them off he began to spank harder random slaps and then 20 on each cheek which hurt so much. When I stood to get my lecture he told me we were just getting started because I was a bad gurl with bad thoughts and I needed to be punished for it. My heart was racing and I was thinking omg! Each time I went back over his knee he spanked me harder.  I obediently did as i was told and spread my legs apart and arched my back so he could see my sphincter and balls as he would begin slapping me very hard. I cried out louder the harder he slapped. at one point when he was asking me what thoughts i thought about i touched myself he told me not to touch my clitty and pushed my hand back to my side. As I continued again to explain my fantasies I tried to touch myself again without thinking and he swatted my hand away and said get back over his knee.  He spanked me hard with a hairbrush and i started crying. My clitty was hard and my nipples were hard as i maintained my submissive position legs wide apart over his knee elbows on his bed. Thankfully he thought i had enough before the bath brush or paddle! Maybe next time. I posted a pic of my bruises today but it was bright red when he finished. He rubbed lotion on my bum cheeks and anus and between my legs after.   I'm such a bad gurl!

  Bitter Sweet Symphony   THE VERVE  Well I never pray But tonight I'm on my knees yeahI need to hear some sounds that recognize the pain in me, yeahI let the melody shine, let it cleanse my mind, I feel free nowBut the airways are clean and there's nobody singing to me nowNo change, I can changeI can change, I can changeBut I'm here in my moldI am here in my moldAnd I'm a million different peopleFrom one day to the nextI can't change my moldNo, no, no, no, noI can't changeI can't change

First meeting of 2023   Laura, a 39 year old female came this afternoon for a punishment session. Laura contacted me on another site about administering a punishment spanking for being disrespectful to her husband, spending too much money and generally being lazy around the house. Her husband, whilst not in the scene, suggested she get spanked as he thought it would be the only way she would 'get herself together' and start taking responsibility of her life and to stop acting like a teenager. He felt that she wouldn't take it seriously if he spanked her and he probably wouldn't do it properly. Laura was a slight woman, about 5'3", and I'd say 120lbs, shoulder length black hair, pale complexion, quite a few tattoos on her arms. She was wearing a red and black tee-shirt, black leggings, and thick soled, heeled shoes. Anyway, Laura was told to report to me at 2pm, she was HALF HOUR late!! Laura was a little sassy when she arrived, and a little cheeky when asked why she was late, "sorry", she said, "didn't think I was in the army", was her response. I immediately told her that lateness isn't tolerated and that I expect her to be here at the time I say. "bend over, now!" I said, and proceeded to take down her leggings. I gave her 6 very hard smacks! "Ow, ow, ow! sorry Sir!" I think she was surprised by how much it stung, having never been spanked before. Her eyes slightly teary. I told her to stand up and pull her leggings back up, I explained that it was her and her husband that asked me to punish her, so that's exactly what she'd get. The three of us agreed that Laura should have a thorough hand spanking, followed by the strap and finally the cane. I led Laura to my living room and immediately pulled her across my knee, I gave her 20 or so hard smacks on her bottom, then took down her leggings to her knees and followed up with a further 20 or so smacks. She was wearing small blue bikini briefs, not much protection. She made a lot of noise and wriggled about quite a bit, but this didn't stop me from continuing. She was definitely shocked by how much it hurt. I have large hands and I spank quite hard. Her pale bottom reddened really quickly, as I expected. I told her to stand up and strip, which she did without hesitation, then it was corner time for 10 minutes, hands on head and standing still. Laura had a reasonably fit looking body, medium sized breasts, pierced nipples, and was smooth all over. Her bottom was nicely pert, not too muscular, but had some 'meat' to it, for want of a better word. Once the 10 minutes were over, it was back over my knee. This time I put her over my left knee, and clamped her legs down with my right leg, and held her arm behind her back. This time she got three rounds of 30 spanks, very hard! Laura tried to wriggle a lot, and was pleading with me to stop through her crying. We didn't set a limit on hand spanking, I rarely do, however we did set a limit of 3x10 with the prison strap, and 3x5 with the traditional rattan cane. After the hand spanking finished, I told her to bend over my quite large leather pouffe, it's the perfect size for someone to be on all-fours, over the pouffe and still able to put hands on the floor on the other side. She waited there for 10 minutes, the crying reduced to sniffles. "Do you deserve this punishment?", I asked, "Yes Sir", "Did you expect it to hurt so much?", "No Sir" "Well that was only my hand, now you're going to get 30 with the strap" I gave her 10 fairly slow swats, not too hard. She cried out a lot, but took them well. Laura counted the next set of 10, "One, thank you Sir", "two, thank you Sir" ... etc. A little harder this time. She could barely speak now because she was crying so much. I re-assured her that she was taking the punishment well and that actions have consequences, so she should think about her behaviour in future. The final 10 came. She didn't count these. I spanked her quite hard and fast this time, her bottom was going from very red, to slightly bruised. She was told to stand against the wall a final time for 10 minutes, she was not rub her bottom. She was very sniffly so I offered her a tissue, I am compassionate lol. The time came for the three sets of five with the cane. I reiterated that the cane would hurt a lot and asked her if she accepted the punishment. "Yes Sir, I totally deserve this punishment" I put her in position ready for her caning, leaning against the wall, legs together, slightly bent over. She was told that she can wriggle about and make noise, but MUSTN'T break position or I'll start again. The first five strokes hurt a lot, she screamed. I could see her hands tense up, and her body straightened, tightening her bottom. Perfect strokes on my part, right across the sit spot. "ok, back into position", I told her. The next five strokes were to be counted, "One, I'm sorry for my behaviour", "Two, I'm sorry for my behaviour", etc. The strokes were reasonably slow, about every 5 seconds, giving her time to get back into position, and to say the line. I then proceeded to rub her bottom, and told that she'd done well, but the last five will hurt a lot. "Ok Sir, I'm ready" These strokes were hard and fast, no break in between strokes. Laura buckled, her body almost touching the wall. Immediately after the last stroke, she fell to the floor, crying and rubbing her bottom, which was now very bruised and sore. I comforted her and rubbed lotion into her bottom. I think the crying was more from the guilt of her behaviour, as much as from the pain of the spanking. I told her she could get dressed and have a drink of water. She was then free to leave. Laura apologised, but I said that she didn't have to apologise to me, but rather her husband. I told her that I hope the spanking was a good lesson to learn and that her husband should contact me again if she needs another punishment. So, a rather enjoyable first session of 2023, her husband has since messaged me to say that the punishment was exactly what was needed, her bottom was sore and bruised for a good number of days afterwards. He said he'll definitely be in touch if he needed me again in the future.

FEEL MY CONTROL Need me to rub your belly???? Feel the warmth of my lip and gentle flow of my breath As I softly kiss around your naval My breast slide over your penis. You feel the warmth of my breath It's hard and pulsating   I can  feel it throbbing Tell me that you want me I stand and allow you to undress me I push you back on the bed Leaning over you, looking into your eyes, I place a kiss on your head So nice and hard I must taste Pulsating in my mouth Leaking a juice so sweet I crawl on the bed and pull you on top of me and tell you Put it inside me now!!! I am so aroused I cum quickly Working on my next explosion Grabbing you and pulling you deeper inside me I am taking every inch of you My breast are bouncing And you gentle hold them down as you suck pull and bite my nipples I tell you not to move I just want to feel myself grinding on you I cum again So nice and hot as it squirts all over us both I slap your ass and tell you fuck me hard We repo to a scissor position My knee bent to my face as you lean in for leverage I rub my clit as you are pounding my pussy I cum again I tell you to take your cock out and rub my juices around my pussy and ass I make you stand and I suck my juices off your cock and balls I play with your cock rubbing sucking and stroking. Massaging your balls, so very hard You moan and you want to grab my head and I tell you not to touch Edging you and then easing off I slow the licking and sucking down You have some much sweet juice just leaking I allow drops on my breast I rub the head over my nipples covering my breast with your juice I think shall I let you cum?   You say oh yes mistress please let me Are you going to be my good boy I do what you ask......ma'am please I turn and get on all four and tell you I want you to cum in my ass You enter very slow and gentle We get into an intense rhythm I can feel all of you I tell you to tell me what you want I want to cum in your ass Tell me again I want to cum deep in your beautiful black ass Harder and faster Baby make me feel it!! You know I am fixing to explode as you feel my body tremble Are you going to cum with me Oh yes mistress may I Oh yes we erupt together All nice hot and sweaty As I allow you to just relax on top of me and let your juices drain in me I then tell you to come lay beside me As you lay beside I rub him slowly until he falls asleep Are you nice and relaxed my pet........WOW  

Creating a Space That Feels Like Daddy’s Embrace       an ingredient list of the nurturing daddy vibes. a casual share. waterfall sounds. crystal bowls..check the blue archangel michael and masculine color used by the youtuber. performed by a guy as well. essential oils of immunity boost blended with palma rosa in the essential oil diffuser ultimate music of silly chill nurturing daddy vibes kurt vile.bassss asssssssss ackwards cozzy robe(mine is blue as well) weighted elephant blanket fuzzy long rabbit to imitate: a hug, a touch, a smell, a holding, a cheek to cheek cuddling a wrapping your body around and feeling a resonance. heartbeat to heartbeat. human touch. What are some of your go-to comfort rituals or items that make you feel safe and cared for? What sounds, textures, or scents remind you of being cared for or feeling at peace? Does anyone else have a favorite song or sound that makes them feel completely held and comforted?

I find it tether offensive that too few people have actually read my profile. I mean I put forth the effort to not only share a bit of myself and what I am looking for but wrote it out rather clearly.  i mean if you can not respect me or at least pretend to give a fuck long enough to read it, why the hellshould I believe you would respect me. If I can’t trust you with the smallest of things like reading my profile, then what the hell makes you think I would trust you to care in a session, date, whatever? i put things in my profile to help YOU understand me and what I am looking for, as well as what I can offer. Furthermore I am not going to tell you read it. I shouldn’t need to. BUT, I do know if you have read it or not. How do I know? Maybe you should have read the thing in the first place. As I am on my soapbox at the moment, to all the people who send a one line, or worse one word greeting message, listen up. That may work at a bar or speed dating, button here a lot more is needed. I know you want to do the least amount of actual effort you can but you get out what you put in. If you can’t even try to make a nice and prober introduction, I can only assume you equally lazy with everything else and not worth my time.   just something to think about

Another special day for me, My ex and mother of my children finally succeeded in what she promised me.  She "destroyed everything I held dear in life".  She can't take all credit for it though.  A huge contribution was done by the total madness that is our Belgian justice system.  Where the whole world lives by the statement: "innocent till proven guilty", our justice wanted something different and chose: "guilty till proven innocent ".  Which means that if you just file false complaints?  The person who receives them will be scarred for live, and will end up with his children taken from him, homeless, and with a mountain of debt for the rest of his life. That second one was me... Since I'm gonna be living on the street anytime soon, a phantasy of mine has become a necassity in order to survive.  I'm sure y'all know what I mean by that. As a consequence, the mistress/master who takes me in as a 24/7 sissy maid will receive a great amount of gratitude and obidience.  So if you're interested in a broken but sweet and passionate sissy that's willing to relocate inside western Europe?  Make sure to give me sign. Love, Nikita❤️ 

Feeling the need to update the profile a bit   Seeking an alpha-type mentor who prefers encouragement over rigid discipline. I love "protector" energy, but I require a partner who knows how to listen—to my body, my energy, and my limits. The Essentials: Patience: I don't rush into sex or scenes just because the vibe is right. Privacy: My home is my sanctuary. I only host once we are in a committed relationship. Respect for Titles: I do not use the term "Master" outside of a committed collar. To me, that title is sacred and signifies a total giving of myself that must be built over time. Dominance vs. Ego: I’m looking for a leader, not an ego-trip. If you’re domineering instead of dominant, we won't be a match.  And dont get me started on my post below where i described 'the dominate male" Geesh...educateyourselfs already...the Google is a powerful tool! Let’s see if our rhythms match before we ever talk about power.

Okayeeeeeeeeee Conducting interviews for live-in.  I don't have time or energy to spend on anything outside of finding the right fit for My home so please, unless you are applying to serve full or part time ASAP, pass Me by.  Let's get down to the nitty gritty... Rolling interviews conducted now and at My time of convenience.  Considerations will be made but I have a short fuse where lack of communication is concerned.  Seeking FLR, TPE 24/7/365 live in.   My search is two fold - for Myself and as an extension, for My mother. Regular service includes preparing meals, maintaining home, and personal care for all.  Full time care attendant for mother.  She is fully functional, simply unable to reason out sequential action and with cognitive impairment for decision making.  She cannot be left alone, loves music and dancing, educated,  a lady (with a fresh mind) and beautiful in her own right.  Specifically, I seek a person who would primarily be responsible for watching over and serving My mother so I may proceed with My own endeavors.  My mother will not be controlling you.  You will belong to Me. Once you make contact, be prepared to discuss your distance and how you intend on getting to Me, your current work requirements, all.  We move to phone interview, inperson interview and trial run.  It IS that simple.

Therapy was downright brutal tonight. Reliving and explaining childhood medical trauma I wouldn't wish on anyone. That shit is hard. So many unwanted tears. Present day, I mean. Back then it was screaming and crying because that was the only power I had when I was on a cold metal table in a dark room by myself and had to keep perfectly still. I screamed when I was allowed to move between tests. Spending time in that memory makes me feel powerless and angry and really fucking emotional. After the session was over my therapist told to me to snuggle my dog, which I am always happy to do. And then I dropped in on my latest obsession. I discovered these coloring videos, but they use markers and create very detailed pictures beyond what is on the page. I mean, it's still coloring, but it's intricate. I like it. I want to do it. Yes, you're right. I already ordered the markers. And um, a book or two. Small happiness. Especially after living in that memory. Childhood me survived, and mostly grown up me is in charge. Less trauma. More coloring. 

August 14, 2024 - Multiple visits from Sextoy69       Sextoy69 has been coming around for a while.  He loves to be tied to the bed and throat fucked viciously.     Probably about a year ago before tying him to the bed and throat fucking him, I started telling him to get up on all fours so I could play with his ass. We both enjoyed it.  I would start with a single finger, applying lots of lube, eventually working in as many as three and sometimes four fingers.   A couple times he let me fuck him with my cock. But since he never cleans out because he comes straight from work, once my cock is in his ass I can't stuff it down his throat. It's one of his hard limits and I respect that.  Definitely not a problem.   So most recently when he gets here, we head upstairs, we both strip, and he gets up on all fours on the bed. I've been using wider and wider toys to open his ass up while reaching between his legs and stroking his dripping cock. I'm usually playing with my own cock at the same time.  We both enjoy it.   In fact I found, I'm enjoying it a bit too much. I get so excited, I'm so aroused playing with his ass and my own cock, it's such a mental rush watching him push his chest hard onto the bed while pushing his ass in the air.   I've learned that I get so excited, that when it's time to tie him down to the bed and throat fuck him I don't last very long. Usually within 5 or 10 minutes I'm shooting my load down his throat.   Two visits ago, I told him we were going to skip the ass play. And I must have throat fucked him for 30 minutes. He likes being tied down tight. And he likes being throat fucked extremely rough. Since my cock is down his throat a safe word doesn't work since his mouth is full.  He knows to smack his hand on the bed frame three times and that's the safe word, or safe action. This tells me to stop instantly.  Not that he has ever used the safe word or safe signal.   So two visits ago, after skipping the ass play, I tied him face up on the bed to the four corners. I tied him tight. He likes to struggle. I like to watch him struggle. But he never turns his head away causing my cock to pop out of his mouth. He just enjoys struggling.   I throat fucked him so hard. I was vicious. There were times my cock would get so rigid that I would push it all the way down his throat blocking his wind pipe. Normally I can hear him gasping for air around my cock and through his nose, but this time I couldn't hear any air going in or out of his body. That's how far my cock was lodged into his throat.   READ THE ENTIRE STORY AT WWW.SirKel.top  

Master's WritingsCreating a DynamicThe dynamic I want to create has its foundation in trust, open communication and pure honesty. These pave the way for how we relate to each other, how much of ourselves we will give and let go within the dynamic, and how safe we feel to be owned or to own another. The greater the foundation, the deeper the dynamic, and I seek genuine, tremendous depth.The best dynamics allow both kink and vanilla elements to flourish. Even in a total 24/7 dynamic there are vanilla elements that impact and are necessary to the health of the greater dynamic. To ignore this is to ignore the human you wish to create the dynamic with.Dynamics must be flexible and ever evolving. They are living breathing things when done correctly. They require nurturing, maintenance, and love, just as those who live within them do. As individuals, we all have needs. We evolve. We grow, and so too must dynamics. There must be flexibility to bend to whims of the moment, grow as the tastes and needs of the individuals evolve, and be reborn when people, situations and events take us off track.Finally, dynamics must reflect all participants. I seek a collaborative development of a dynamic where each has an appropriate voice, with opportunity to step outside of roles as needed for essential conversations to ensure none are forgotten as we build and rebuild our dynamic over time.Creating this dynamic has been my dream for longer than I can remember. But no one person can create this on their own. It requires another who feels this need as greatly as I do. 

The dimly lit bar was filled with the usual Saturday night crowd, the air thick with the scent of spilled drinks and lingering perfumes. In the corner, a striking figure caught the eye of many, but few dared to approach. Rosalind, a voluptuous woman in her early forties with fiery red hair and piercing green eyes, was known for her domineering presence. She was a BBW with curves that could make any man weak at the knees, but her commanding aura was what truly set her apart. Across the room, a man named Thomas noticed her. He was tall, with short grey hair and a solid build, his eyes a soft brown that held a hint of timidity. He had been watching her for some time, his curiosity piqued by her confident demeanor. As if feeling his gaze, Rosalind turned to look at him, her lips curling into a slow, seductive smile. She raised her glass in a silent toast, beckoning him over with a flick of her wrist. Thomas hesitated for a moment before making his way to her table. "Mind if I join you?" he asked, his voice steadier than he felt. Rosalind leaned back in her chair, her eyes roaming over him appraisingly. "I might," she replied, her voice a low purr. "What makes you think I'd want your company?" Thomas swallowed hard, his heart pounding in his chest. "Because I think you enjoy a challenge," he said, his voice barely above a whisper. Rosalind chuckled, a sound like velvet. "You're right about that," she said, patting the seat next to her. "Sit." Over the next hour, they engaged in a battle of wits, their banter laced with innuendo and subtle flirtation. Rosalind was intrigued by Thomas's quiet strength, and Thomas was captivated by her boldness. As the night wore on, they found themselves drawn to each other, the sexual tension palpable. "I'm Rosalind," she said finally, extending her hand. Thomas took it, his fingers brushing against hers. "Thomas," he said, his voice hoarse. Rosalind's fingers lingered on his, her thumb tracing small circles on the back of his hand. "Tell me, Thomas," she said, her voice a whisper. "What are your fantasies?" Thomas hesitated, his breath hitching in his throat. "I... I enjoy being dominated," he admitted, his eyes meeting hers. "Being told what to do." Rosalind's smile widened, her eyes gleaming with excitement. "I see," she said. "And what about chastity? Ever thought about being locked up?" Thomas nodded, his cheeks flushing with desire. "Yes," he admitted. "I have." Rosalind's smile turned wicked. "Good," she said. "Because I have just the thing to make your fantasies a reality." Two weeks later, Thomas found himself in Rosalind's apartment, standing naked before her. She had taken him shopping for a chastity cage, a chrome device that now adorned his cock. He had been locked in it for days, the sensation of being caged driving him to the brink of madness. Rosalind looked him up and down, her eyes lingering on the device. "You look delicious," she said, her voice a low growl. "But I think it's time to take things up a notch." She turned to a table beside her, picking up a stubby black vibrator with spiral veins  that promised pleasure beyond imagination. She switched it on, the hum filling the room. Thomas's eyes widened, his cock straining against the cage. "Please," he begged, his voice a whimper. "Please let me cum." Rosalind chuckled, shaking her head. "Not yet," she said. "First, you need to earn it." She gestured to the bed, and Thomas eagerly climbed onto it, lying on his back. Rosalind knelt between his legs, her eyes locked onto his. She leaned forward, her breath hot on his cock, and slowly began to lick the length of it through the cage. Thomas moaned, his hips bucking against the restraint. "Shh," Rosalind whispered, her tongue tracing the tip of the cage. "Be quiet, or I'll have to gag you." Thomas nodded, his breath coming in ragged gasps. Rosalind smiled, her eyes gleaming with satisfaction. She reached into a drawer beside the bed, pulling out a black ball gag. She fastened it around his head, silencing his moans. Thomas looked up at her, his eyes pleading. Rosalind chuckled, her fingers tracing the lines of his body. "Such a pretty sight," she murmured, her voice a low purr. "All mine to control." She leaned down, her lips brushing against his ear. "You're mine now, Thomas," she whispered. "Every part of you." Thomas nodded, his body shaking with desire. Rosalind smiled, her eyes gleaming with wicked intent. She stood up, her hand reaching for the vibrator. She turned it on, the hum filling the room once more. "Now," she said, her voice a low growl. "Let's see how well you can take this." She pressed the tip of the vibrator against his cock, the hum vibrating through the cage. Thomas moaned, his body shaking with the sensation. Rosalind pushed it harder, her eyes locked onto his. She could see the pleasure building in him, his body tensing with the need to cum. "Please," he begged, his voice muffled by the gag. "Please let me cum." Rosalind shook her head, her fingers tracing the lines of his body. "Not yet," she said. "You haven't earned it." She turned the vibrator up, the hum growing louder. Thomas's body shook, his cock straining against the cage. Rosalind could see the sweat beading on his forehead, the desperation in his eyes. She smiled, her fingers tightening around the vibrator. "Come on, Thomas," she murmured, her voice a low purr. "Take it. Take all of it." Thomas moaned, his body shaking with the effort. Rosalind could see the pleasure building in him, his body tensing with the need to cum. She smiled, her eyes gleaming with satisfaction. "Good boy," she said, her voice a low growl. "You're doing so well." She leaned down, her lips brushing against his ear. "Now," she whispered, her voice a low purr. "Let's see how well you can take this."

I’m real, single, and ready to meet. You should be too. Now, don’t get me wrong. Lots of people contact me about my profile and say job well done, I/we are like minded, BUT blah blah blah (I am taken, I am too old/young, I am too far, etc.). They respect the realities of the universe that have made us like minded, but not a match. I can respect that. I am certainly grateful for friends on this journey. This Journal entry is not addressing or discouraging friends. This is about those who express legitimate interest… So, I think my profile makes it clear… I am looking to date, I am looking to meet someone. I didn’t think I had to clarify after an in-depth profile such as the wone I wrote that I am not interested in you if you are married, living with someone, have a stead significant other, etc. Now, if you are “seeing” other people that is fine. Those other people should not be living in your house, sharing your bank account, doing your grocery shopping (unless it is for a date or something), paying for the renewal of the tags on your car, etc… “Seeing” someone means you are taking them to dinner, and possible having a good time after once in a while. “Seeing” someone means that person KNOWS you are “seeing” other people! If I call or text when you are with them, there is no need to hide your phone. I mean, I don’t expect you to respond or answer, you are spending time with someone else, that is fine, we aren’t an item, but I have enough self esteem I will not be the other woman, and I will not be hidden. If you will cheat on your wife, girlfriend, etc… You will eventually cheat on me too, and thus I am not interested in you. I am interested in loyalty, honesty, and devotion. How can one submit to someone who is offering anything less? Obviously, I don’t expect it day one. I will probably see other people for a time too. A bond must be built and that takes time. That being said… a bond isn’t built in messages on the web miles apart from someone I have never met in person. We might send messages a lot after meeting because you travel or something, but meeting in person is crucial to me. The internet is far too anonymous and there are far too many players out there. Heck, I had a guy wait until our third in person date once to finally admit he was married! It was because he couldn’t maintain the in person dating, he finally had to come clean though. He would have spoken with me for a year online had I let it continue that route… So, I am not a huge electron communication person. I also hate phones. I will even schedule my doctor’s appointments via the web if I can. Phones are used to call if I am lost getting where we planned to meet, or if I am running late and need to text to let you know. I don’t send kinky or risqué picture via the web or phone. I don’t use snapchat… where all communication disappears before your wife can see it. We send a few emails, seem to be hitting it off, then why should we share everything in more emails? What will we talk about when we get together? Continuing to chat online is going to leave me awkward and silent with nothing left to talk about in person. Left get some coffee, have dinner, see a movie. Let’s get out of the house! Yes, I know I say I raid (game) 5 nights a week… Only two of those nights are nights I feel I really can’t skip right now, and raid doesn’t start until 8:30 at night, and those are nights in the middle of the week… so if you really want to be drinking coffee that late at night, in the middle of the week, I will see what I can to lol. If one more guy tells me, well, I have a significant other, but the relationship is dead, has been for some time, but it is complicated… and in the same breath, tells me he wants to be my Dom, and manage my world… Get your house in order before you enter mine which is already in order. I am worn out on chatting with guys who seem amazing, lead me on, but are just using me as their side joy because they are unhappy in a relationship, they have no intention of leaving. Again, if you would hurt her by chatting with me… what are you going to do to me one day? Are there any good ones left at my age? Should I just give up the search? Guys… fish or cut bait. Show me you aren’t married lol. Show me you aren’t running around on your girlfriends. Show me it is worth the time and effort to continue investing myself in some of these conversations that start to feel sketchy… Pick a coffee house and tell me when we are going!

This is not a fantasy experiment, a curiosity phase, or a place to “learn as you go.” I am looking for an obedient, emotionally regulated, experienced cuck who understands that this dynamic is built on discipline, restraint, and service..not constant sexual noise. If your idea of being a cuck starts and ends with porn scripts, frantic messages, or needing reassurance every five minutes, this is not for you. I value control, not chaos.   You should already understand that the role is not about your gratification, that obedience is shown through consistency rather than words, and that boundaries are structure..not something to push against. You must be comfortable existing in the background, supporting without needing to be centered, and maintaining composure even when attention is not on you.   Experience matters. I am not here to train basic etiquette or explain why patience is required. You should already know how to listen, wait, and follow instructions without negotiation or emotional spirals. Emotional maturity, self-control, respect for authority, discretion, and reliability are non-negotiable. I value men who can be useful without entitlement and who understand that access is a privilege.   I am not interested in men who lead with explicit language, confuse desperation with devotion, think access is owed, or collapse without constant validation. This dynamic works because I choose..not because someone begs. Fulfillment should come from knowing your place, serving with intention, and supporting my standards and lifestyle without interruption.   Communication will be clear, direct, and intentional. Silence will sometimes be part of your role. If that makes you anxious instead of focused, you are not ready. This is a privilege-based dynamic: access is earned, maintained, and can be revoked.  

 DisForDaddy