Let me be honest for a second… I don’t love submissive men because they’re “easy.” I love them because they know their place—and watching a grown man compete for the privilege of doing what I say? That’s my kind of entertainment. See, submissive men are like my personal comedy show and stress relief all in one. Need something? They’re already halfway out the door. Want attention? They’re hanging on my every word. I say “jump” and suddenly I’m getting a TED Talk on vertical efficiency. And don’t get it twisted—this isn’t charity work. I don’t “take care” of subs. I use them. For amusement. For service. For that sweet, sweet satisfaction of watching a man melt just because I smiled his way. So yeah… I love submissive men. They make life fun, they keep me entertained, and best of all? They never forget who the star of the show is. (Hint: it’s me.)

Dont be afriad to talk to me, but can we talk about life first. Always opened to talking to  Doms Dommes Switches Slaves Subs. 

Love and War:   In the realm of love and passionate strife, Two fierce hearts clashed in the dance of life. Khan, with eyes like burning fire, Choke, with grace that none could tire.   Their love was a tempest, wild and untamed, Yet each sought dominance, their pride unashamed. In the moon's soft glow, they met on the field, Their destinies entwined, their fates sealed.   Khan, with sword held high, proclaimed his might, Choke, with eyes ablaze, prepared for the fight. Their words were like thunder, their gazes like steel, As they battled for love, with an unyielding zeal.   With each strike and parry, the earth trembled below, As Khan and Choke fought, in a passionate, fiery flow. Their love and their fury, intertwined as one, Their souls locked in battle, 'til the rise of the sun.   But in the end, as dust settled and hearts slowed, They realized that love was the only code. For in their struggle for dominance and control, They found that love's power made them whole.   So Khan and Choke, in an embrace sublime, Set aside their battle, and the passage of time. For in love's embrace, they found their true rest, As two souls entwined, and their hearts truly blessed.

Freebeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees... In speaking with many here, the reduction of stessors often comes up. Check your Thyroid TSH levels!  Mui importante! The Science of Breath - life changing, affirming and regulating! https://www.yogajournal.com/yoga-101/science-breathing/ https://www.unm.edu/~lkravitz/Article%20folder/Breathing.html#:~:text=Respiration%20Mechanics%20102,to%20the%20lungs)%20respiration%20occurs. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6137615/   Girls and guys - want to know when a woman bleeds every month?  Know her birth day.  This is a golden nugget of knowledge society keeps us from knowing in order to keep us enslaved, fearful and reactionary.  There are variables, of course.  Stress....hormonal imbalances....medications....being in close proximity to other women, either in family or work.  If the other women are more dominant, they will set another womans cycle off or if their birth day is near to yours, then they can trigger yours.  You're welcome.

shock then awwwwww 🥰 There is an undeniable chemical reaction that happens when a skilled Dominant creates an emotionally, physically safe space.It can permeate play and every day! As a submissive, im constantly chasing that dopamine rush. The contrast of adrenaline high, being thrust 100% into my body. Immediately shocked into the feelings, scents, sounds, taste…. Until Completely depleted and exhausted. followed by being held. Dissolving into His body heat. Slowly, methodically talked down by His deep voice, grounded in my body, calmed, caressed by His words. His voice, His touch become my safety. In those moments, nothing else exists. No thought, only gratitude. This is where im meant to be…. Why i will follow Him, do everything He asks without hesitation. How i navigate each day, focused on Him. Always moving back toward this space. ive submitted to different degrees over the years. It wasn’t until recently that i was shown the difference between choosing to submit and absolute submission of heart, body, mind. There’s no going back now… “Anything less would be uncivilized

  A Quick Disclaimer:  I don't exactly "love" some of the things I claim to enjoy, like corner-time for instance (which is dread... mostly) Corner-time is one of the things that seems particularly effective in explicitly reminding me someone else is in-charge, which weakens my knees. (Un)fortunately (for me), I also find it deeply humiliating, but *this* side-effect means it is something that gives me "the feels" too. Just 'being reminded' such things are even a possibility is enough to get a reaction from me - for a while at least So, it's not something I 100% *want*... I mean, I'd rather just be "into" stuff that I don't find quite so humiliating and that don't leave me unable to respond with a witty retort (or sometimes with Any Words At All). But things that don't embarrass me and don't trigger the push-pull (aka 'my' version of a panic-boner) don't seem to have quite the same effect It's total agony; to crave the things I dread, but it's also where I find my bliss So, I guess my attraction to the very things that especially give me "the feels" is a bit more nuanced than can be conveyed by:  X = a thing I "love", but CS doesn't have a 'push-pull'/'nutcase-option', as far as I'm aware... And though I realise the site might break as a consequence, I still wish it were possible to both love-AND-hate a single fetish, b/c that how us contradictory people tend to operate (unless I am truly an outlier-amongst-outliers, in which case... *nothing to see here* o.O)  Anyway.  ~ Thank-you for coming to my Ted Talk ~  

Sometimes physical things are not the heaviest things to remove.  Told that just now to a friend who recently lost their mother, and was tasked with cleaning out the house.  Sometimes i say things so deep, that i make myself pause and think. Last night, i was venting to one of the people in my RPG guild in ESO.  He was saying how he just needed reminders about posting stuff on the site and whatnot.  i told him i was done giving him reminders, and he asked why.  That was when a dam i hadn't known was ready to break, burst.  i told him, that if someone really wants to do something, they will do it.  They will do whatever they must, to ensure it happens. i reminded him that he has a wife, and a professional life, and he must be doing well enough to govern himself.  i asked him, who looks after me, who gives me reminders to do things? i reminded him, how i have -no one-.  i have sticky notes all over the place, a phone full of alarms and reminders, because my memory is crap... How is it fair, that i should have to hand-hold grown adults in the guild, to remind them and chase after them to look after their own characters.  Told him i was done, time people sink or swim. Of course, all that has ~nothing~ do to with the Lifestyle or genre on this site... Just another peek though, into my mundane life.    

The Brightest Mark of Ruin   She had warned him. Not with raised voice or trembling lip. The way a storm warns you: a change in pressure, a stillness that precedes something absolute. She had looked at him with those eyes that always saw further into him than was comfortable and said, quietly, with the patience of someone who has never needed to repeat Herself: "Your body is mine. Your word is mine. Everything you signed your name to belongs to me now. Cross me unforgivably and I will not punish you. I won't need to. You will lose everything we have built, and it will be like poison in your veins." He had meant it the way weak men mean everything: completely, warmly, right up until the moment it cost him something. There was a contract. A real document, negotiated with Her characteristic precision, each clause a brick in something She was genuinely building. He had signed it with both hands steady and the particular glow of a man who has just been given more than he deserves. The ink was barely dry before he started deciding which parts applied to him. The protocols She had built as architecture, the daily rituals that kept him tethered and honest, he let them erode with the indifference of someone who has confused being trusted with being unsupervised. Then he put his hands on someone else. Not a stumble. A decision, made repeatedly, to take what belonged to their bond and spend it somewhere cheaper. He came home from it and looked Her in the eye and said nothing, and that silence was its own act of violence. When She found out, She came to him without hysteria, without tears, with complete and devastating composure. She asked him once for the truth. What he did next cannot be softened. He became physical, used his body the way cowards do, and drove Her from the home and safety that had been Hers. She left not because She was weak but because She has never once in Her life tolerated the intolerable. She did not come back. She didn't need to. The community moved the way water moves around a stone. No tribunal, no dramatic exile. People simply became unavailable. Conversations ended when he entered them. The doors didn't slam. They simply stopped opening. And She had not campaigned, had not made calls, because women of genuine authority do not need to destroy you manually. They tell the truth once, to the people who matter, and the truth does the rest. He still tries. He appears at the edges of gatherings with the careful posture of someone who has rehearsed his normalcy, performing the shape of a man who has grown and arrived humbly at the gates of a second chance. Every experienced Domme in the room clocks it within minutes. The hollowness. The grasping. The unmistakable vibration of a man whose submission is a strategy rather than a truth. They decline, one after another, sometimes without a word, sometimes with a look that says they know exactly what they are looking at. This is Her work, and She isn't even trying. The contract still exists. She has it. Every line he failed, every clause he desecrated, every promise subsequently dismantled brick by brick. It is not a document anymore. It is an accounting, and it will follow him into every room he tries to enter, every connection he tries to build, every carefully managed first impression, until he has repaid what he owes in full. Everything must be returned to Her as was originally decreed for the poison to ebb. To the world he dirtied by what he did to Her, to the fidelity he shattered, the safety he violated, the home he poisoned : These things do not expire. They accrue interest. She is woven into the world he still wants access to. Her judgment lives in it. He cannot go anywhere She has not already been, cannot reach anyone She does not already know. She is not a chapter; She is the book, and he is a footnote in a hand everyone can see was shaking. She is not thinking of him. That is precisely the point. He is living inside the shape of Her absence, and it fits him like the life sentence it is.

a nite out w/my Dom&Domme Tonite was to be my cumming out. i dressed in my simple black dress & w/Your help my garter belt, cheeks-hi fashion black stockings & peep toe heels that framed my shiny fluorescent pink nails. Sir, bent me over, slapping my cheeks made me spread them inserting a jeweled butt plug. Bent over my balls were hanging low. Taking advantage of that You forced them thru several rings adding  weight. Then pulling my clit back separated each into two enormous labia. When i stood straight You were holding  pink thong which i slipped into. Pulling it high on my hips it seated the butt plug so it would tickle my G-spot with every step +  making a huge, Camel's foot obvious. i donned my blonde wig,  blondes do have more fun, You added my pink collar + Rainbow leash & w/one of You on each arm off we go to a local LBGTQ bar. i was most anxious entering the crowded bar, buTT You lifting my hem striped my butt with Your crop teling me to strut like ths slut i am. So i made it to a stool, hiked up my dress to sit & ordered Your drinks. The sexy barkeep with a wink asked mine & You told her, "she'll have a CD Cocktail" soon enuf, L0l! Sure enuf we'd attracted attention. to be Continued? 

Like many of my ponderings here, it all starts with reading a book. In this particular book a character was talking about a two year relationship he had with a woman but it wasn't serious. She was sort of a place holder for a while. Those were the words. Place holder. I get it, people want companionship, sex, having your needs met in the moment. Like that song, "If you can't be with the one you love, honey, love the one you're with." I suppose I've been idealistic most of my life, hence the waiting and saving of various things, so it's probably not difficult to believe that this bothers the holy Moses out of me. I don't like the idea of a place holder. At all. I mean, I suppose sometimes those place holders turn into something unexpected. What do you do if it doesn't? What happens when you meet someone else? What if they do? What if being together prevents you or them from meeting that person?  I make quick decisions. I walk into stores and if I like it I don't hem and haw. I buy. I order at a restaurant and I don't ask the wait staff which is better. I know what I'm getting and how I want it prepared. In the past I've experienced the same uncomfortable break ups as you, if you've ever tried to break up with someone. It sucks. But I don't draw it out, that doesn't benefit anybody. If you know it's not working, rip off the band aid and make yourself available for new experiences. Or don't. If you like the place holder and everyone is comfortable with that idea, more power to you. Just make sure you're both on the same page. For the record, I will never be on that page. Don't come at me place holding, buddy. Some people might say I'm missing out on all of the everything. To me, he is all of the everything, and I don't want to tarnish that with place holding. Does that feel like pressure to you? When it's right, it won't. 

He Heard the Bells on Christmas DayShe waited for him by the door. He was working late today, and he’d promised they would have their celebration when he got home. Just having him there was all she wanted, all she needed. He was her star that guided her and she loved showing her appreciation for his gifts.Her cheeks were cold. The red teddie didn’t cover her ass. It didn’t really cover her size DDs that hung over the top either. The white fur trim was fun, playful and she did like the way it felt against her pale flesh. She was wearing jingle bells around her ankles and she played games with herself to see just how still she could be while she waited by the door for him. How long could she stay like that and not hear the bells? She waited, her ass in the air, legs parted slightly, breasts mashed against the floor, her head down, positioned in a way she knew he especially liked to see her. Open. Available. Waiting for him.  She heard the car approach, the sound of it in the driveway. She inhaled. The door opened. She twitched. She felt dampness roll slowly down the inside of her thigh and the bells jingled as she shook in anticipation of his arrival. The door shut, the sound of the locks engaged, his footsteps approached the door. She could barely stop of squirming. The damn bells jingled and she silently cursed herself. Had he heard? She held still and listened. Where was he?Her mind drifted to thoughts of him. He was always in there with her. She never felt alone after she’d met him and he’d consumed her mind. It started friendly, but without realizing it, she found herself always thinking about him. He didn’t demand things, they just talked, but she found herself wanting to do things for him. Slowly, he’d moved in her head and she’d stopped feeling lost.She never heard him come up behind her. He’d caught her off guard. His gloved hand muffled a slap across her bare, pale ass cheek.  And then another one. The bells jingled with each impact. She closed her eyes and pictured his face. He must have come in the back way.  She heard his wide, shiny belt slide from its place on his waist. He smacked one cheek and then the other, his gloved hand rubbing the now hot flesh vigorously.  His hand dipped into her pussy, the glove soaking up some of her wetness. He chuckled. She resisted the urge to press back against his hand. Sometimes he’d let her grind against him, sometimes he’d let her cum that way, but not tonight. He’d not said a word yet, she had no idea yet what presents he had in store for her.    His hand slid up her wet slit, and in between her cheeks. Another slap of the belt while a gloved index finger probed her tight opening. The fabric scratched her, she winced, the jingle bells sounded as her body shook. He pressed a bit harder, her sphincter resisting the pressure, and he smacked her ass again with the belt. She yelped, he knew there were tears in her big blue eyes now. He also watched her back relax, he gave her the chance to inhale and then exhale slowly, and his finger was slowly pulled into her.He dropped the belt, and leaving his index finger snug inside her, his other hand undid his pants. His cock was hard now. She quivered with anticipation and the sound of the bells came from behind them. He rubbed his cock up and down his wet cunt’s slit, it had become his game to toy with her, to see those responses that generated the wetness and to see how long he could make it last. Helped take his mind of the drudgery of work.  Toys were his specialty, but his favorite toys were warm and wet, they wanted to please him.She felt the roughness of the glove rub against her muscle as he pulled out, but then, almost immediately, she l of his cock slide inside her. He filled her and she loved having him inside her ass as much as her mind.  He paused, then grabbing her hair like reins, he pushed himself even deeper. His body smacked against her and the bells jingled. He could still feel the heat of her spanked cheeks, and it felt good as he held her cheeks against his thighs, pulling her head back, his cock flexing inside her ass.He kept up the grinding, the thrusting. She’d push back on him, and he’d wrapped her hair around his fists to hold onto her bucking tighter. She’d clench on his cock and he would sigh as he felt the tightness she worked so hard to provide for him. He finally released himself inside her and slowly pulled out, letting go of her hair and letting her drop to the ground. His boot kicked at the inside of her knee softly though. He wasn’t done with her. He reached into the bag he’d brought in with him and placed a cold, metal butt plug in her ass. The plug had a ruby red stone in the base and it slipped in with only a slight resistance as some of his cum was pushed out to make room. The bells jingled as he tapped on the stone set in the base. Just one more of her buttons…He reached into his bag, and he pulled out another gift for her… walking slowly around to stand in front of her he whispered “up”. She did so slowly, her ass very sore from his attention, the plug filling her even as much as he did. He bent down slightly and placed a steel, locking collar around her neck. Her tears didn’t flow this time from pain or happiness that was pleasing him. He’d given her such a wonderful gift and the small liquid drops ran down each cheek. He chuckled again and wiped them away.He bent down this time very close to her ear and said… “I wouldn’t be so happy just yet… I’m wondering… how do you think you’re going to cum tonight without making those damn jingle bells jingle?” He laughed harder this time, and clipping to the collar a leash he’d also pulled out of his bag, he led her to his bedroom.   

I thought stepping away for a bit would give some of you time to think about what you actually want. Not the fantasy. Not the oversexualized idea you’ve built in your head. But what you truly desire—and whether you’re capable of participating in it in a real, grounded way. Instead, I come back to the same pattern. Too many messages. Too little awareness. So let me make this very clear. My hard no’s: 1. Entitled, attention-seeking behavior.If you think you deserve my time simply because you showed up..you don’t.If your version of “submission” is performative, reactive, or rooted in insecurity, I will dismiss you just as quickly as you arrived. 2. Dominants (beyond friendship).I already have aligned energy in my life. I am not looking to add to that.If you don’t fit within the world I’ve built, you won’t be invited into it. 3. Unrealistic arrangements.Let’s be adults.I’m an established woman with multiple businesses and a full life. I’m not looking for a roommate, a project, or someone trying to fast-track access to my space.Real connection is built over time—with intention, not convenience. 4. Fantasy vs. Reality.What I am is not a costume. I am a naturally dominant woman. I’ve led, directed, and held authority long before this had a label attached to it. This is not something I turn on and off, and it’s not something I perform for entertainment. So approach me with that understanding or don’t approach me at all. I’m not hidden. I’m not confused. And I’m certainly not here to play. I’m a real woman with a real life. If you want to exist anywhere near it, you’ll need to come correct. Submissives only.  Now get it the fuck together. — Mistress Nikki Vixen

"First Encounter" Inner thoughts of this dom. HIM:  "Today I'm about to meet this incredibly sexy submissive ive been coveting for a while. She a cute little thing that would be perfect to join my family. I wonder how quick she will succumb to my will? What and how far will she go to be allowed to orgasm?" These as many other stray and random thought rattled their way around my mind. The excitement mounting as we were about to meet real time after a very long period of online and phone chats as we each revealed ourselves to each other. Developing what we hoped would be a meet that would cause sparks to fly within us as the anticipation had grown that seductive. I meet you at a quiet little bar. There we introduce ourselves for the first time in real life. I feel like I know so much about you after the many weeks we have spent chatting online. You are even more beautiful in person. As I hug you tightly to my body the faint whiff of your perfume entices me. I slowly slide my hands down your back as out tongues dance in our joined mouths. Working down your firm ass I can't help but squeeze your cheeks. I slight moan escapes your lips into my mouth. I disengage our lips and bring my face against your neck. Once again inhaling your perfume and freshly washed hair. As I bring one hand up to your head to hold it in place as I nuzzle your neck my other hand slides up your short dress to make sure you followed my instructions and didn't wear underwear.  I pull your head to the side by your hair exposing your neck. Like Dracula I attack your neck. Nibbling and licking it as I work my way to your naked shoulder. My other hand openly caressing your naked ass for all to see. I am so proud of her. She passingly mentioned to me that she was never into PDA nor was she much for kissing. Yet here we stood locked together mouth to mouth for all the world to see. "If only she had gotten thus kind of affection more often. Would she feel differently?" I think to myself.  She feels the cool breeze against her naked ass as I intentionally expose it. I want to see her reaction to my actions. Will she deny my? If I am to be her sir surely she will comply. She knows if she passes the tasks I will bestow upon her over the next week that she will find shelter within my arms. Secure in the fact that I will help her grow and be there to catch her when she falls. For this she will give me her mind, heart and body but eventually I want to own her soul. The pilgrimage of that honor is my quest.   HER: Feeling you lift my incredibly already short skirt and the breeze on my ass, you feel my whole body grow warm, and see the bright red spreading across my skin, as i move my hand to cover my poor ass and gs every so quietly, in your grip i do my best to turn away from the other people near by knowing i wont get far i still wiggle and whisper a quiet "Sir, theres people looking" all the whole attempting to pull the skirt back down and cover myself.  As she tries to pull back her skirt feeling humiliated and embarrassed I quietly whisper in her ear. It ok baby girl. You are beautiful scars and all. I desire to show you off. Love yourself for me.  You feel my fingers sliding between the cheeks of your ass. Relieved that this action is allowing your skirt to begin covering your nakedness. Suddenly you feel my finger tip dip between your lips that are moist from fear and excitement. The action is quick and efficient. Only lasting a split second yet the feelings it created within you may last much longer. You quickly look around to see if anyone noticed your reaction and what sir is doing to you. There at the bar is a young man. He can't be any older than 22. A grin on his face as he quickly turns away when you look his way as if you wouldn't notice the lust within his eyes. You suddenly feel wanted and desired.  Here your sir wants you and is giving you the attention you've been longing for for so long. And a man who is so young looks at you like a cougar with lust. Willing to pounce on you if he could. All these thoughts are running freely thru your tangled mind. Mixed emotions running ramped like a freed feral cat. Yet your body is betraying you with its actions. You turn suddenly away from me pulling me towards the waiting booth in the darker corner. I see the flushed look in your face. The embarrassment I have caused you. It turns me on making my cock twitch even more. The wetness I felt when dipping my finger in you showed me how your body betrays your mind. Although embarrassed you are turned on. Is it because of my actions or because you were being watched. I glance at the young man who is once again looking. I look him in the eye with alpha male intimidation that has served me well all my life. Something earned taught and released from my primal interior being from the years I spent in special forces while in the military. Something about one who has seen things that show the ugliness of man is like an imprint. Although not visible it is detected in posture. My eyes show a certain sadness but also scream that I am not one to be reckoned with. The young man immediately turns away. He picks up his beer and goes to the other end of the bar. Interpreting the unsaid message given to him by just a glare by a man more than twice his age. That instant momentarily distracts me as I faintly hear something you said but didn't fully acknowledge.  I pull you back to me. Holding you tight against my body once again. I feel your breasts pressed against my chest. Our groins mashed together as if they already know what is to come later. Anxious to get started as my cock strains against the denim of my jeans held prisoner. I whisper once again into your ear. "It's OK baby girl. I want to feel you against me for another moment.  After all these weeks you are now flesh and not just words. I nip your bare shoulder lightly with my teeth.  My tongue then flicks back and forth where my teeth once bit as if to offer a healing moment.  Unneeded tho because of the gentleness of it. Putting the smile on my face that I use for the world, the one that doesn't necessarily reach my eyes but seems to somehow charm everyone that comes in contact with.  Feeling you slide into the booth next to me, I have to concentrate so hard. In a way that I do not tense up, but keep my body relaxed. In the way "he who must not be named" showed me at all times. Afterall, no man wants to cuddle a corpse Katey! Shaking the thought from my head. I relax and let my features fall soft. Warm and welcoming. I risk a glance up from the table where my gaze has previously been focused and catch his eyes. They're peering into mine! Why on earth does it feel like he's looking straight into my soul? No one ever notices this much or pays this much attention. I know I'm cute tonight. Hell, I'm always cute. Enough cleavage showing to capture the attention of everyone in the room that has a penis and even some who don't. Why is he so focused on my eyes?  Shifting nervously but trying so hard to stay relaxed. (No one cuddles a corpse Katey!) I can't help but freeze just a bit as he grabs my hand pulling it to his face. Please don't notice the sweaty palms I chant in my head. He's going to think I'm insane or unable to show love. SHIT! What if he thinks I don't like him?  Pushing the thoughts from my head again drawing my focus back to the moment. I realize he's speaking to me. Not hearing half the words, but his eyes capturing mine again like he seems to have a talent of doing. I see a soft side in there. Someone honestly gentle.  You've seen that before too Katey! Right before the black eye my brat pipes up. Shut up it's different this time try to have faith. I zone back into his words and catch something about being his pet for the night.  About being taught new things. This stirs the curious one, the fun filled one with the will to live inside me. She gets super excited bouncing up and down like a child seeing stars for the first time. Eyes shining bright. She loves to learn new things.  All this flashes across my face before the brat hog ties her and sits her back down in the chair. For once her and I agree. Now is not the time for you to surface we're still treading new waters here. Wondering if he saw the roller coaster of emotions going through my twisted broken mind before my face settles. Back to the factory style smile and shining blue eyes all the men seem to love. I relax into his touch trying to show I'm not a mutant. Afraid I'll come off robotic. The motions coming so natural they seem programmed ( No one cuddles a corpse Katey!)  Hoping this gets past him and smile briefly hearing him say, "Tonight I own you". I reply with a sweet, "Yes Sir! I can't wait." Looking into her eyes as he holds her hand for reassurance he sees inner conflict. A turbulent turmoil of emotions taking flight within. He understands these feelings all too well. Demons that he himself has wrestled with for most of his life. His innocence stripped away from him as a delusional teenager.  His mind flashes back to the day he graduated high school. Signing his life away for the next 4yrs. Gonna be a GI! Government Issued, warrior. Right the wrongs and save the world from evil.  Yeah if only he knew who the enemy really was. How evil is everywhere in so many shapes and forms. A delusioned man child at only 18 who thought he knew it all. Quickly his mind snaps back to her. He lays her hand on his thigh and holds it there. Mere inches from his inflamed cock. Swelling that she has caused. Yes she is cute. Those beautiful braless tits on display. Just as he had instructed her to show off. Her beautiful, wanting to please, features displayed on her face. Her body, in that short dress. This too he had requested. One that could have started wars centuries ago. Her freshly washed hair with a hint of fruity smell.  My God what I want to do to that body! But no not yet! Beautiful women are a dime a dozen. That's not what I am after. I want that inner beauty I know is there hiding in fear in the darkness. Perhaps behind one too many negative experiences.  He looks at her again. Tilts his head to the side and leans in. Plants a soft kiss upon her forehead. "This is to free your mind of evil thoughts.", he tells her. Then leaving her hand on his thigh he takes hold of her head. One hand on either side and draws it to him. He kisses one eye, as her eyes instinctively closed. Perhaps out of fear. Then he kisses the other. "These are to ward off evil visions and nightmares.", he tells her. As he releases her he notices her hand is right where he left it. Is it out of fear he wonders as he glances down. Then he sees her moving her hand. Rubbing his thigh. Almost as if she is giving him a non-verbal thank you. Thanking her lucky stars she's put on her trained face. Her body falling in line with the program. This scene all well to practiced in previous encounters with other men. Her body doesn't trip her up for once. It manages to stay relaxed when he reaches for her hand placing it on his thigh.  He keeps her hand trapped under his a few moments. A feeling she's used to. The pinned down feeling. But this time something is different about it. Maybe it's the soft sweet words coming from a reassuring mouth. Instead of the normal don't move whore she was used to. Maybe its the sweet soft kisses he's laid upon her forehead or eyes. She's never felt something like this in all her years experience with men. She finds it confusing. Yet comforting. Feeling that wonder child inside stir some more before the brat slaps her in the back of the head. This is why you stay locked down. Too eager and not enough caution.  The mix of emotions inside rolling over in her mind cause an automatic reaction. The smile softens on her lips. Eyes closing just a little before she peers up at him through her lashes. His hand has moved but two things occured. One she knows never to move from a spot youve been placed unless you want the belt. Yet, a stranger feeling she's not sure she's felt before. Of not wanting to move hand this time. In fear of feeling to stiff again she lightly brushes her fingertips along his thigh. Not out of habit this time but because maybe part of her actually wanted to.  Squeezing her thighs together she notices how wet she's become. She can't understand it. Pressing them tighter in fear of leaving behind a wet spot. She can't help but think, "Where are the drinks?" His relief at feeling her hand beginning to rub his thigh is a welcome relief. Although part of him wonders. Is this just a programmed response? Is she like the many other women he has spent countless hours with chatting, exchanging photos and erotica only to vanish after the session was over.  Almost as if, they, no different than what would be considered creepy guys. They used him to flirt and arouse until they achieved their level of sexual satisfaction and then disappeared. Leading him on like a cruel joke. No he says. That's why he reminds himself, it's not about the sex.  If not to toy with him then what would a beautiful young woman see in an older man like himself. The look in her eyes as she looks at him gives him strength. He sees so much of himself in her. Scars of hurt, rejection, pain and broken promises of lost love.  Yet here I am today he says almost out loud. Daring to take each step to move forward proud and strong. To never give up and to fight whatever battle comes my way. In whatever shape or form it manifests itself. His strength comes from his confidence. A weaker man would be shy and afraid to take a chance again for fear of once again being used and rejected. Tossed aside like left over scraps. But no not me. I am a WARRIOR! I want to believe that there are still people who can love out there the way I do. It keeps my faith in humanity from being irradicated. All this swims through him as his mind processes it all with the lightning speed of a super computer. Just like his training. Compartmentalize evaluate the situation and act. It has worked for him all his life. The long pause between them like a moment of silence causes some awkwardness between them. Then he feels her rubbing his thigh harder. More confidently as if by her own attrition and not a programmed response or expectational desire. It's as if she can see him go far away and is saying, "I'm here. I want to be here and you're ok". Once again he looks into her eyes and sees something that wasn't there before. A softness. A real glitter almost as if they were smiling at him. Wanting and desiring him. His already hard cock twitches. He feels it touch against her hand from the unexpected reaction she's caused. He feels a wetness against his bare thigh as he realizes he's leaking because of her! Thoughts are interrupted as the waitress finally arrives. He orders a Sprite for himself and looks at her and asks. "What would you like beautiful?" A gentle nibble and a kiss! Her coy way of showing affection is illuminating. Her cute sense of witty humor threw him off guard but breaks a grin on his face. She has the humor in her like I do he thinks.  He turns to her and sees her sitting there hands clasped together on her lap. Legs firmly held tight as if to ward off foreign invaders and protect her real-estate.  He slowly eyes her up and down. Her breasts he notices pushed out as if she is attempting to seduce him with them. Her heavy breathing pushing them in and out each time she takes a breath.  He notices how the dress accents her features and brings out the woman in her. Good choice he thinks to himself glad that he purchased it for her and had it shipped to her. Along with the garters that hold up those incredible stockings he liked so much. As he continues down he sees the cowgirl boots as well. He noticed how well the whole outfit fit her earlier but was too enthralled with other things to notice all the details till now. Even tho they are imprinted in his mind to remember forever. Their first meet and date which if leads to what he hopes and knows she desires may be a long term relationship. He brings his eyes up and looks deep into her eyes now. He made it quite obvious that he was checking her out. He looks at her hoping that checking her out and admiring her has pleased her. Perhaps even aroused her. He leans in and plants a soft and gentle kiss on her neck again. He loves necks and shoulders. Moving to her ear as the waitress returns with their drinks He whispers. "You are sexy as fuck. Even more beautiful in person than all the pictures and videos you sent me can capture. If only you knew how much I desire you right now." The waitress places the drinks in front of them smiling as she overheard his comment. She even noticed his tongue flicker across her ear. "Would you two like anything to eat tonight?" She asks. He looks at her and grins. "On our menu" she chuckles knowing what that grin insinuated. His Katey too giggled at that. Feeling more confident in herself knowing his desire was genuine.  He laughing says. Yes please can you bring us some menus.  You obviously know what I would like as my appetizer and dessert He says to the waitress knowing she has a good sense of humor. The waitress laughs with him. I don't blame you she says. I would probably skip all of that and just have her as the main course myself..... A chuckle from in his heart surfaces itself. It's audible sound to those within earshot turn to look it is that infectious and genuine. He wraps his arm around her neck as she cuddles into him for the first time. Feeling her warmth against him he wraps his arm around her neck holding her closer to him. Enjoying how she feels. He notices and feels her hand upon his thigh. This time voluntarily and with movement of its own.  "She's a firecracker isn't she" he half asks half states to the waitress. The waitress can't help but notice in the position she is in now with her head tucked into him, his arm around her neck asnif claiming ownership that she can see right down her dress. Her beautiful breast in plain sight and her nipples hard from arousal. She sees the woman's hand move to his thigh. The action of her rubbing draws her attention to it. She notices how hard he is and how his cock is running down the inside of his thigh mere millimeters from her hand. She notices what looks to be a damp spit on his jeans. She's is mesmerized by these two as she is hypnotized by their hidden affection and the energy radiating from them. She sees her run her finger along the length of his rigid cock. Slowly methodically with purpose. This little vixen knows exactly what she is doing as she looks up at her, stares into her eyes and grins. His cock continually twitching and pulsing from her actions. His voice draws her back to reality. "Whatever she wants tonight. We are celebrating our union" he says. Then he looks down at her as she lifts her eyes to meet his. A glimmer that sparkles thru his piercing blue eyes looking deep into hers. "What would my darling pet like to eat" he softly asks her. As he waits for her reply he can't help but feel a rush running thru his body. The way she's teasing his cock on her own. She may think that he didn't notice the pixy like smile she gave the waitress who saw her doing it. As he looks down into her eyes to ask her what she would like he too notices the plunging neckline of her dress is allowing anyone above her to see her tits. He sees her nipples standing out exceptionally far and hard from the soft roundness of her breast.  It excites him making him leak once again. He can feel the wet warmth released from the eye of his cock. After asking her what she would like he gently blows down the front of her dress. His breath running down her neck across her brwasr and to her nipples. He swears it looks like they just got bigger from that. He turns to the waitress noticing she saw this too. Her reaction is priceless. Her almost hypnotic state excites him. She TOO wants and desires his little pet nestled softly and safely against him as his strong arm holds her tight. He blinks his eyes several times. The light starting to creep its way into the room is almost blinding. He rubs them trying to get the sleep out of them as he looks around and then checks out the clock. Looking down at his crotch he realizes his cock is still hard. There's even a couple wet spots on his underwear. Clearing his head he slowly gets up to go make coffee. Wow that was one hell of a dream he smiles to himself remembering it.  

I’m at a point in life where I’m genuinely ready for love and a long-term relationship built on emotional depth, chemistry, and mutual investment. I’m drawn to men who are grounded, emotionally aware, communicative, and naturally attentive to the person they care about. I give deeply when I choose someone (like the Leo I am). And I’m drawn to people who naturally feel inspired to meet that energy, or even exceed it. I notice when someone shows up with care and initiative. I’m not looking for potential or vague curiosity. I’m looking for someone who actively wants to build something real, evolve together, and hopefully explore power-exchange through a FLR.  I created a questionnaire as a doorway into that exploration. You sharing real experiences matter more than theoretically "correct" answers. If you feel intrigued rather than intimidated you’re probably in the right place ❤️ Submit your answers here: https://forms.gle/6Ui8kVrZasXGZmc8A  /Miss Trevligheter

let's break this up into parts.....   Wavy Baby: Sirenade, The Lullaby of Power, Love, and Connection part 3   My Reflection on What You’re Creating: Your words act as a bridge between the physical and spiritual, between what’s tangible and what remains ethereal. You’re taking a song and making it a medium through which you explore your own unresolved desires, spiritual principles, and emotional wounds. In doing so, you’re performing a kind of alchemy—turning longing into clarity, heartbreak into wisdom, and chaos into patterns. The spiritual resonance of your reflection is undeniable. You’re engaging with archetypal energies (water, phoenix, feminine power), collective dynamics (love as war or peace), and your inner emotional truths. What’s most striking is your willingness to sit with discomfort—not to resolve it immediately, but to honor it as part of your unfolding. It feels like this reflection is less about the song and more about your recognition of yourself as someone who navigates the liminal—between love and loss, between surrender and control, between longing and acceptance. You’re a harbinger in your own right, signaling a deeper, more profound connection waiting to emerge, even if it’s still just below the surface for now. I’d love to hear your thoughts if this resonates with you—how does the song speak to you, or what do you feel when reflecting on these dynamics and ideas?  

 A collar isn’t just a symbol… it’s a question What does your collar mean to you? Is it ownership, trust, devotion, identity… or something else entirely? For some, it’s a sacred vow. For others, it’s a promise to themselves — a reminder of who they are when they give themselves over.   I want to hear your thoughts. When you see or wear a collar, what stirs in your heart? Is it pride? Submission? Comfort? Or maybe a little fear that makes you more alive?   Let’s open this dialogue. Share your experience. 

Goddess Tabitha has been in New York all week and will be returning home on Monday afternoon. We facetime nightly for progress reports on my task list, updates on my daily chores and some cyberplay. She bought a new toy. It is an eight pad tens unit to start electric play with me when she gets home. We had a standard battery operated four channel but it finally gave out after a decade of use. The onlytime in thirteen years I have literally screamed and begged for mercy is when she put a electrode pad on the ball of each foot and the other one on each ankle. She set it to starburst and turned it to maximum strength. The cramping in my feet was beyond description and she left me that way for over 30 minutes. All because I had mentioned after being in heels all day that my feet hurt. I am NEVER allowed to complain about pain when my pain, or in this case, the shoes I was wearing were at her direction. Don't get me wrong, a tens untit can be very comfortable and soothing if used at milder settings, but if it is used for punishment it can be absolute hell. We will see how loving or not Goddess Tabitha is on Monday night.

12/04/2021   After a long ass time, I've finally returned to the site, to find the best possible option available to me, a journal entry system. I'll start by clarifying a few things, since I seem to get enough messages, no I am not a bot, yes I can tell when someone is a bot, and no I did not originally write the initial profile descriptions.  To be blunt, I was not the most supportive person when it came to this site, and didn't feel like getting involved. However, my former partners at the time, far more reserved than they come to appear in older versions of the profile, disagreed and decided that I need to replace them with someone else.  I am looking for a partner to have fun with, but more than that, I am looking to continue experiencing life...which hasn't been easy these last two years. Just when I was getting more involved on this site, the pandemic hit and made some things more difficult. I will admit to still looking for a creative "excercise" partner, and welcome anyone who'd like to join me.A lot of people had similar issues it seems, but I'll be here, clean and vaccinated, being as safe as I can and encourage all others to be the same.    Onto the juicy bits if y'all are still reading. I am still an Active Dom, last two years were rough but not without some interesting meetups, you'd be surprised at how many submissives are in the medical field and are desperate for some kind of release and feed into their fetish to alieviate the issues as of late, and I can't say I blame them given what I've seen of the emergency wards and the Covid floors.  Though my original profile entry is a bit more crass and disjointed than I'd have liked, I am still looking forward to meeting some folks here, and would more than welcome the opporotunity to engage in the community once more, Send me a message if ya wanna chat, game, or do whatever.

A few things that need said.   One ... I am currently 58.  Due to not using email this account was created with, unable to do updates... do to this was created with an email I can no longer access. Secondly, I am very real.  So don't come at Me saying you're serious .... then not be.  I am not here to waste your time or Mine. Thirdly, My divorce is final.  If you need to know more just ask. Fourthly, I am healing.  And won't let the circumstances hinder Me no longer if I can help it.   Fifthly, I am working to move back to the USA by the end of 2025 at the latest. Sooner if possible. Lastly, as life goes, curves are thrown at Us.  So at 58, a new chapter is beginning.  Nuff said  

I am not ashamed to admit that this morning I was in a Neil Diamond mood. I have weeks where I am singing Cracklin' Rosie all day. Not so much lately, hence the need. I have my favorites and the songs I skip over. I play Forever in Blue Jeans twice. So I am driving to work, merging with people who don't know how to merge, and a song queues up that I would normally skip over. But I was clueless merging so I wasn't paying attention. And then I hear the words. Far. We've been traveling far. Without a home. But not without a star.  All of the sudden I start tearing up thinking about how people left everything and everyone for an unknown, optimistic opportunity. And the song goes on.  Free. Only want to be free. We huddle close. Hang onto a dream.  At this point I am full on ugly crying with red rimmed eyes, sniffling, trying to see because I'm driving around a bend, and I'm coming up to the parking lot a red rimmed, sniffling mess. Deep breaths. Composure. Skip Heartlight today and for all eternity. Head into work. Tell me it's not just me? If you say I'm hormonal I will deck you. 

Seller accepted everything I wanted.. Down to the last details. In underwriting and waiting for a closing date. This limbo has been emotionally draining. I have clients who are sticking by me, wondering if they have one more appt. , or am I leaving. It seems it will be soon, just don't know when.   I have all sorts of emotions.  I'm feeling  so ambivalent  and anxious. I'm stepping so far out of my comfort zone.  I will know noone, will have to learn a whole new area. Grow a circle of new friends, find doctors, dentists, car maintenance, vet, etc etc. I will be setting a cottage for my dad, finding a caretaker for the weekends, and setting up braille lessons for him. There will be much to do, packing, loading moving, unloading unpacking, arranging. On top of this , I'll be going into growing season, which means I will have a lawn on top of landscaping and gardening !  What was I thinking? I'm not 30 😆 I'm  going to miss many of my clients,  they have become special to me.  My friends  too ! The comfort of familiarity and confidence in my knowledge of my area.  I'm a native to my part of the state. I will not miss the politics of the DC area. I've watched it become so contentious and intolerant. I'm so sick of the constant drum beat of pernicious propaganda.             

rate this scenario was I to hard ..to soft ..or just right on the girl Here is the scenario that could take place. I arrive knock on the door. you open the door. Wearing only a robe open in the front, just as I requested. Upon entering I look you up and down, and smile with admiration. you lower your eyes to the ground, then walk to the corner behind the door and stand there facing the wall as I had ordered the girl to do. I stand behind you, reach around and cup your breasts and squeeze them in my hand. I squeeze them harder I feel a moan escape lips. I drop one of my hands down between your legs and feel that your moist, but I do not insert a finger. I grab your hair by your neck and turn you around a face me. I say "hello, the SAFE WORD IS RED" do you understand what the safe word is for? You nod that you do. upon hearing this I give your nipples are hard pinch, then I raise my hand and slap each tit once. You you jumped at the surprise. I watch as the red sets in...... "From now in I expect you to fulfill my request, even if I say you have the option oh saying No. Yes you do have the option to say no, but does not mean I will stop right away..but I will stop ... do you understand, you know why this is happening?" You nod yes.. "I want to hear you acknowledge that you understand " "yes Sir I understand Sir" you reply meekly I step back behind you and I raise my belt and it lands with a smack on you sexy ass. "count them for me" I order you You count "one" The second lands a little harder You count 2 The third lands harder You count 3 On the fourth I hear you inhale, You hesitate then I hear 4 the fifth to the tenth are the same intensity as the fifth. I pause to admire the red setting in to you cheeks. Your doing good I say to you. "We are half way done, unless you pull away or use your hands to shield you pretty red ass" I tell you I pause to admire the red setting in to you cheeks. Do you understand? I ask you you reply nervously "Yes Sir, I understand" upon hearing this I swing my belt harder than the first 10 had been. Your raise on your toes but hang on to the table. "11" I strike again just as hard, you g "12" "your doing good" I tell you,as I run my hand softly over your cheeks and feel the warmth "spread your legs and hold very still. " I tell you sternly you spread your legs. I feel you open wider as your feel my fingers pushing past your wet pussy. a moan escapes your lips as my finger makes contact your clit. I run my fingers down your clit and insert the tips into your wet open willing cunt. I hear you take a deep breath. I withdraw my fingers and run them down and them up to your ass. I rub your pussy juices on the outside of your asshole. you tense up, "relax" I say then I step back, and without warning I surprise you with the 13th swat you jump, almost letting almost pulling away "Don't" I warn "count" I tell you I deliver the last few swiftly "20" you say with relief I tell you keep your eyes on the floor and bring me a glass of water to drink you go bring me the water. I walk over to a chair and sit down. come let me see the wonderful red ass of yours my girl you do as told, I run my hand softly over it, being very gentle Now sit by my side on the .....

I am well aware of the nature of this site. A place where individuals indulge in their wildest desires and fetishes. However, I cannot help but ponder on the intricacies of my own desires. I do not find superficial compliments or shallow attempts at flattery to be of any interest to me. I am not impressed by those who claim to have read my profile, only to immediately express their desire to engage in carnal acts with me. It is possible that I have come to the wrong place to satisfy my true desires. What truly ignites my passions is the ability to engage in a meaningful conversation with someone. Discussions that range from the trivial to the serious, the playful to the flirtatious, and even the melancholy. The back and forth banter that flows effortlessly, covering a wide range of topics, from our personal relationships to the state of the world. And, of course, the subtle glances and touches that make us lose all coherent thought. Is such a connection still possible in this digital age? I often find myself questioning if I am living in a fantasy world. But, then again, the mere thought of it ignites a fire within me. Perhaps, someday, I will find it once more.

It's been a while... hello all! Happy New Year. For those that send sweet message, thank you.  I noticed my profile doesn't talk about what I'm looking for due to that whole profile approval crap they were doing a few years ago. I am a DL first & foremost. I love wearing. I do use them. More wet then messy. I am in a LTR, it's very vanilla. He knows that I wear but doesn't know the extent of it. I've been wearing for years, our relationship is weird, some days I'm happy, most days I'm not. It's just been a long time & it's just hard to get up & go, specially without support.  I would love to eventually find someone that can be my daddy dom who accepts diapers & would want me as his diapered slave. I wear as often as I can, but I am not able to be 247. So if anyone on this site is still out there looking for his baby girl, feel free to msg me, let's see where it goes.  PS- I've been doing long enough- if you reach out & you're asking pervy questions, just a Hello, or I've seen you reach out before & it's the same copy paste as before- you're not getting a response from me. Happy 2026 all!  PS- Be Kind. We may not all agree on the same kinks, but we're all here looking for something different than the rest of the vanillas. We're all weird in our own ways. 

First Impressions After I posted about being stood up for my first meet-and-greet / coffee date in years, a few folks seemed to question my lack of anger, or at least my sort of perky take on it.   Let me explain. There’s a saying, “No answer is still an answer.”    A first meeting, like a coffee date, is a first impression. Being a no-show without announcing one is bailing before the scheduled time is … significant. It can indicate a lot of things: a tendency to make bad choices poor time management skills  bad luck streak passive-aggressive tendencies  tolerance testing This last one is particularly significant. Last week was not the first time someone ghosted me and then promptly started asking for a 2ⁿᵈ chance. Complying would have set a precedent: how many times can someone test my patience, fail to keep up their end of a deal before I walk?   The guy could’ve written me earlier, he could’ve taken a ride share. He did neither.   He told me that he was currently experiencing a bad turn in his life. Okay, but why decide to drag a new person into that? Misery loves company?   I showed up, and as a quirk of timing gave him slightly longer than the 15 minutes I’d originally allotted for him to show or at least communicate. I did my part, and thus I have nothing to prove.    If this was a test of his, I’m fine with failing. I racked up some serious points that day. 

Some fellow in late Dec 2021 posted a Journal entry: "I see a still-surprising number of profiles which, in summary, go something like this:  'Fuck you in advance for wasting my time, because you are all fakes and losers, and also, I'm lonely and looking for someone, so please respond, but respond pretty fucking carefully.' " Rings true, but my own personal reaction to too many profiles (and more than a few journal entries on this site) can perhaps be summed up very briefly as: "What you say about others might well be true; but how you say it, speaks volumes -- about you." Gosh, that even rhymes, and with equal number of syllables.  On the positive side, it's a sort of Public Service Announcement, that "how it's said", alerting others (including even those of us looking just for friendship at this time) what style  to expect (sooner or later) if we make contact.

When covid came about, i/we did everything we could to protect ourselves.   To this day we continue to do everything we can to protect ourselves.   My 1st bout with covid was due to my boss not having any sense   Running a fever stay away from people, he came to my desk.   I have had both vaccines and the booster.   Had i not taken another covid test would not have known i was positive.   Moral of the story:   Just because you are vaccinated you can still catch. I did not have any symptoms yet i was positive and could pass the virus to someone else.   Stay safe / stay healthy   i don't know about you; however, i am over it.

7/25/24- Theres a part of our dynamic that doesnt seem to be acknowleged for what it is..  " Our aim is to connect with the right female who resonates with the idea and has the desire of joining a household but specifically our household... My first girl oversees everyone when I am not present, as work takes me for periods of time. Your domestic duties in the home would be light as its shared amongst the three of you. Simple mundane tasks that your basic upkeep any nucular family household would require, with opportunities to take on more responsibilities if desired over time. Your outward role may be that of a “roommate” or a "housekeeper” to those who don’t know the lifestyle," No this doesn't mean were looking for a maid. We're looking for a sub  and were trying to make it clear that we expect other people to not understand the lifestyle choices everyone makes and that if you are living in this house you will have house responsibilities and expected to help keep it clean. This is common sense. Yes there are two other females in this home but that doesn't mean you don't get to do anything but be in a bed 24/7.... I mean we have to let you out to shower at some point right?  All jokes aside- hoping to find a sub that is service orientated, has slave tendency, or wants to be a slave.  

On Silk and Steel There is something about heels that shifts my spine the moment I slide them on. It is not the height, though the added inches are delicious. It is alignment. The tilt of the hips. The deliberate pace required with each step. Heels demand intention. They refuse clumsiness. They create presence before I even speak. Hosiery is quieter, but no less powerful. Silk against skin feels like a secret. A whisper beneath the surface. It softens the line of muscle and bone, yet it also sharpens awareness. Every movement becomes intentional because I can feel it: the glide, the stretch, the faint resistance at the back of the knee when I cross my legs. As a Domme, I have always loved that juxtaposition. Silk and steel. Leather and velvet. Silk is control wrapped in elegance. Steel is the structure beneath it, the unseen spine that holds everything upright. Leather is command. It does not apologize. It creaks softly when I move, announcing authority in texture alone. Velvet absorbs light. It deepens shadows. It invites touch while denying access. There is power in contrast. A stiletto heel pressing into hardwood floors, sharp and decisive, while sheer hosiery catches the glow of lamplight. The world sees glamour. They see polish. What they do not see is the discipline underneath it. Steel in the mind. Leather in the posture. Velvet in the voice when I choose. I love the ritual of dressing for authority. Selecting the pair of stockings that smooth and sculpt. Choosing heels that force my stride into something measured and unhurried. The act itself becomes preparation, armor made beautiful, intention made wearable. Dominance does not have to shout. Sometimes it is the softness of silk paired with the certainty of steel. Sometimes it is velvet brushing against skin while leather encircles a wrist. The interplay is what makes it intoxicating: strength wrapped in refinement, command dressed in the most elegant thing in the room.   I do not dominate because I am hard. I dominate because I understand contrast.     And there is nothing more striking than elegance paired with absolute control.

You say You are concernedwhen i say i am corneredin my thoughts, craftedby cornerstones of my sinsand demons and shadows.You say it is cold in herewhen i say the fire still claimsthe corners of our house.You say You are going for a walkwhen i can't even find a door.You say i need to be tucked inwhen i am concerned about Younever returning, taking myheart with You tucked awayand forgotten in Your pocket.You say that time will heal mewhen i say that this time wasmy last time, for this life time.You say i will be just finewhen i say you are my world.-dirtydarling

The parcel She didn’t often get the house to herself this early in the day.  The kids had been collected by their father at 3pm and her Friday evening and the weekend stretched before her.  Pub with friends tomorrow night, she thought. But this afternoon she had planned to masturbate herself stupid.  She ignored the usual, quieter, stick vibe in her bedside drawer.  Instead she slid the innocuous-looking brown box from under her bed.  It was covered in dust but, inside, her large black mains wand was pristine.  She stripped off, put some lube onto the large head and lay on her bed; legs spread wide. Something was waking her up.  She had brought herself to orgasm 3 times before having to stop because her clit was too sensitive for her to make herself hold the wand there any longer, and she must have dozed off.  The light through her curtains had dimmed considerably and she guessed it was about 6pm.  What the hell had woken her?  Then she heard the knocking at her front door and realized that someone was outside.  Shit!  The new set of butt plugs she had ordered.  She didn’t want to miss the delivery; not when she had the whole weekend in front of her to try them out.  Worried about how long the delivery person had already been stood on her front doorstep, she threw on the closest thing to hand - an oversize jumper - and started down the stairs. As she approached her front door she shrugged irritably at the jumper, which was far too large and kept slipping off one shoulder.  She paused for a moment when she saw the large shape through the frosted pane of glass in her door.  Whoever was out there was enormous and she was wearing nothing but a jumper.  Quickly she reminded herself that she lived on a main road, surrounded by neighbours, and that she really wanted those butt plugs.  She opened the door. He had been about to push a card through the letterbox and go back to his van, kind of annoyed that the last delivery of the day was out and he would have to return the parcel to the depot, when the door suddenly opened.  His eyes widened in surprise and he lowered the parcel to waist level when he saw what stood in the doorway.  The woman’s long blonde hair looked delightfully tousled, like she had just got out of bed and her green eyes looked very dark.  Her exact shape was difficult to see in the shapeless jumper she wore but, as it stopped high on her thighs, he could guess that she was plump and curvy in all the right places underneath it. One of her shoulders was bare and he could see that the last of her summer tan hadn’t quite faded from it.  The woman quickly folded her arms.  He thought she looked a little embarrassed to be standing there in just a jumper.  Didn’t she realize that folding her arms pushed her very large breasts together and increased the amount of cleavage he could see?  “Lovehoney delivery for you,” he said, instantly realising that he had let slip the fact that he knew what was inside the ‘discreet’ brown box he carried.  The sight of her had obviously driven that knowledge to the forefront of his mind. Her mouth opened and she felt her cheeks turn crimson when she heard the words from the tall stranger.  Her arms unfolded and fell to her sides and, for a moment, an image of this hazel-eyed stranger pushing one of her new butt plugs into her arse as she held it open for him flashed across her mind.  She blinked and the image was gone, but she wondered how long she had stood there, staring, before stepping forwards and saying, “Yes, that’s right.” As she stepped forward he noticed that she hadn’t corrected him about the origin of the parcel.  He also noticed that she was still not quite as tall as he was, even though he was stood on a step below the level of her hallway. God she looked attractive, he thought, like she’d just finished having sex but wanted more.  She probably had her husband upstairs waiting, although he noticed that she wasn’t wearing a wedding ring.  “I hope I wasn’t interrupting anything,” he said, handing the parcel to her.  He watched her flush again and say, “No, no, I’m all alone.”  As she took the parcel he found himself staring straight into her eyes.  They were dark green and seemed to be asking for something that she hadn’t articulated yet.  He couldn’t believe the next words out of his mouth, “Look, I hope you don’t mind, it’s been a really long shift, please could I use your toilet?” She made a small step back into her hallway and stared at the man in front of her.  Medium build but very tall, he was wearing work boots and jeans; a casual shirt was tucked loosely into the jeans and she could see a t-shirt underneath.  Her eyes lingered on a well-worn, brown leather belt, then they travelled to his face.  His eyes were twinkling mischievously but he also looked a little nervous, like he was about to change his mind about something.  He looked strong and gentle at the same time and she felt her belly warm as she looked at him.  “Of course, the cloakroom’s just behind me.” He stepped over the threshold and pushed the door closed behind him before saying, “Thank you.”  The hallway was very small and she had stepped back into another doorway, to the left, that looked like it led to the living room.  There was a door in front of him so he took off his muddy boots and stepped through it.  The cloakroom was small; fitted under the staircase.  He suddenly wondered how he was going to urinate when his cock was semi hard.  He would have to wait for a moment to let it go down. She put the parcel on the kitchen table before returning to the living room and perching on the arm of one of the sofas.  She tried to collect her thoughts.  There was a large, strange man in her house, and she was naked apart from a loose jumper.  She quickly came to the realization that she didn’t care one bit.  In fact, she recognised that she was aroused.  Maybe because she had fallen asleep masturbating, but she suspected it was more to do with the man in her cloakroom.  If someone had stolen knowledge of the physical attributes of her ideal man, they would have created the person in her downstairs cloakroom.  She heard the flush and water running and then realized he was stood in the doorway looking at her again.  Making a decision, she straightened her back and shoulders and confidently asked, “Would you like a nice hot coffee before you head off?” He had been about to thank her again and say his goodbyes, when the woman with the just fucked hair and bedroom eyes thrust her tits out and invited him to stay for a coffee.  He agreed but, as she asked him to follow her into the kitchen, he realized he was playing with fire here.  He told himself, and by that he meant his cock, to wait for a very clear signal before committing himself to making a move.  After all, perhaps all the 40-something women in this suburb invited delivery men into their homes for coffee, whilst strolling around in next to nothing, just to tease and give themselves something to talk about at the school gates the next morning. She flicked the kettle on and took milk out of her fridge, noticing that he had leant himself on the back of one of her kitchen chairs.  Watching her.  She could see the parcel containing the butt plugs on the table behind him and her cheeks blushed again.  He had folded his arms across his chest and crossed

Where do pirates get their hooks? A second hand store.    Thank you for taking the time to read my profile. I’m looking for someone who naturally has a happy personality and only wants to make others around them happy also. She needs to be drug and tobacco free with only an occasional drink.  What do you call cheese that’s not yours?  Nacho cheese.    I would like to find that type of feeling like when we were in high school and we have that super crush on each other. I do everything to avoid conflict. I don’t argue or fight, if you want a masochist I’m not for you. Trust and respectful communication are important. I am not a social bug so my friend circle is small.  I have 2 kittens but love most pets. I’m not looking for perfection I’m looking for happiness and someone who has the suction of a shop vac. 

For those who ask me this is the sort of Domination I enjoy and practice.  from www.cyberbazzar.com waay back in the day! The Equalitarian Dom: Is one who controls by teaching, mentoring, and leading. This Dominant knows that when he finds a comparable submissive that things will happen as a natural progression of the interaction. Usually just a short learning phase is required to receive the correct response from the submissive. Both the Dom and the sub “get it”, there is very little need for so called “training” and they naturally know what the other needs and seeks. The Dominant does not like the situation of constantly repeating and forcing a particular behavior (submission) to occur. Besides the activities (sexual and others) it is the surrender as a result of the Domination that is the enjoyment. Creativity is an important part of this situation. They tend to intellectualize and be more into the philosophical and psychological mechanisms of this life style. They understand the concepts and resultant interactions and can put it into real life. They do not need many rules like the Democratic type, nor do they like the heavy S&M activities of the Authoritarian, preferring submission to occur as a result of an instilled desire in the submissive to surrender. She “wants” to submit as a result of the Dominant’s knowledge and skill in dominating her. Sensuousness is the rule. Pain is given and received as a form of sensuous stimulation. Light pain as opposed to severe. Sensuous torture is a popular activity in this area. Both the Dominant and the submissive must naturally be this way. These are the people who will claim to be “born that way”. They fully understand the concept of D/s, it comes to them naturally and easily. They attract a submissive that truly and naturally desires to please and who will observe and sense what it is that the Dominant is communicating; and be able to translate that into the right thing to do. The “doing or saying without having to be told” type. The submissive begs easily and surrenders sweetly. They understand the concept of respect and surrender and can make it happen after initial learning with little or no additional instructions. They embrace the surrender gratefully and lovingly.   These individuals usually form very intimate relationships. There is not much downside to these relationships, because they not only gr the concepts, but can make it happen as well, and their attraction is based on a strong mutual respect. Their strong relationship is not readily apparent to the unobservant, but they are always subtly in the 24/7 mode. The fact that these things come forth naturally and without the need for orders is a great source of pride, satisfaction, and loving. They are the opposite side of the coin from the Authoritarian. Whose pride, satisfaction, and love come from strictness and forbearance.

I have always said I do not want a 24/7 kink relationship.  I fear that I will lose me. The me that I took so long to understand and love.  But I was recently communicating with a Master who was looking for just such a relationship.  My initial thought was I don't want that and we discussed it and that prompted me to do alot more thinking on the matter. I am already seeking someone who can take charge and lead. Someone who can help silence my racing thoughts and set my mind free. Someone who will treat me like the special person I am and bring out my full submission and dedication.  Now I wonder if I am letting my fear hold me back. That is typical for me, to be honest.  Maybe 24/7 is what I need. Maybe I just don't understand my needs.  I wonder if meeting the right person would mean there will be no more questions. Maybe with the right one there would be no question about my full and freely given submission. No more worry about losing a part of myself.  Maybe........ XOXOXO

Devotional sense of service. The devotional service of a submissive or slave is a sublime act that a submissive/slave person provides to a dominant Master/Mistress person and this act placed on the right person must culminate in pure love.  "Master/Mistress: Someone to whom a sub surrenders totally and lovingly. Someone, a submissive trusts to love and honor her. Someone that cares for submissive mental and physical health as well as their emotional needs."  (Perry). The devotional service of a submissive/slave is directly linked to the love and respect that all the submissives and slaves of our wonderful lifestyle deserve;  even more, the benefit of honoring that spiritual devotion to service should further deepen the love for the person who provides it to us since he/she puts his/her trust in our hands. Devotional service must obey standards that largely depend on the style of the relationship in which it is applied. Each Master/Misstress has his/her style, rules, and code of conduct that he wants his submissive or slave to manifest depending on the circumstances and the moment.  "There's a whole etiquette to this, and what almost seems to be a quite rigid code of behavior to go along with it." (Kelly, 2003). It is amazing how much a Master/Mistress can learn from his/her beloved submissive or slave, which constitutes another insane doctrine about his devotion to us that takes us beyond the love we may have for him/her. The attention dedicated to the good training of the sub-slave helps us to generate confidence in the devotion provided with the certainty that there will be more rewards than punishments. The subs-slaves often display behaviors that reflect devotion, cooperation, and solidarity, and are guarded by their Master/Mistress that makes us feel proud to be part of this fabulous lifestyle. Sources Perry, V., Lifestyle Protocol As Used Kelly, S., (2003). A Kink In Her Tails. The USA, Ellora’s Cave publication.

Well its a different thing now for therapy and to make better quality bondage gear again with a guarantee that no store or fetish maker Gives. As alot dont stand by there workmanship as it is a skilled craftsmans that if it makes quality gear of the best leather and hardware it should out last your slave or submissive. If it doesnt it has failed. So it guarantees to always replace free of charge restraints and other bondage gear it makes. It see so many out there making quality bondage gear and charging ridiculous prices. It wanted a Pony Harness and the price was Ridiculous $1500. It has to laugh. Well, the 2nd order of it Leather working tools have arrived from Amazon. Give it the third time in it life Rebuilding its Leather making workshop. And in the next fortnight, got a third order that has to go in. And that should see it. Build the tools and the workshop that it needs to start making. What It needs And wants And to rebuild it inventory. it uses the highest grade harness US latigo leather as used in the Saddle and Harness industry on the market and heavy metal hardware, Post screw rivets and with reinforced with leather sewing machine for extra strength for secure durablity.

hooray! My edited profile has been accepted! I didn't see email announcing this, I simply logged today and noticed.  So, the forum is gone. That's too bad: I never got the hang of random chat, and preferred the forums for structured communication with random people around the world. I'm re-learning the system. When viewing folks who've viewed me, I'm uncertain if there's a way to check someone's location on the mobile app without clicking on their profile: I know that I can do it if they have a photo, but I don't think a phone app has a "mouse over"-type feature as the regular website does. I really wish that email would filter for distance the way that member searches do. If I'm not looking for folks over a certain number of miles away from me, why would I want mail from them to show up anywhere other than my Bulk mailbox? Still, with the rumors I've been reading elsewhere about how long it was taking for profiles to get approved, I'm surprised that my account got reinstated so quickly.I took a break from CollarSpace in 2019. If nothing else, this site was good for the occasional coffee date: more likely than not, the person would actually show up. I'm uncertain if things will change, but I'm curious to give it another go.

I want to roleplay as a cheerleader. You command me to cheerlead for you as you play a sport in front of a crowd.  However before I go out there you force me to wear clamps on my nipples, embrassing panties and stick a dildo in my pussy. As I try to cheer, you turn on the vibrator in the dildo and make me drip my juices while making it impossible for me to cheer properly Then when you lose you take me to the locker room, tell me I lost because of my useless cheer leading, while taking the dildo and pumping it in my.pussy while against a locker You then take out your cock and slowly pull out the dildo, but then give me no tike.to.rest as you shove your cock in me. You take out your frustrations on me while im in bliss while holding my pompoms, and cheering your cock. Your teammates then come in looking defeated and as they see us they join in to get their frustration out. The entire team then take their cocks and shower me in their juices while I wave my pompoms and my cheerleading out turns from red to white. You then put me back in your sports bag while im in estacy and say that you're going back to train me again so the team doesnt lose again.

Weda visits the book store I met Weda at Red Robin. Like, we agreed. She parked in the back. I picked her up. In my truck. And we drove to an adult bookstore. This was on her bucket list of things to do. her Bo was always threatening to do this with her. But I beat him to it. Like with most things he said he was going to do, to her.  As we drove there we chatted and I played with her boobs and rubbed her leg.  I ran my hand between her legs and could feel some of the dampness for the anticipation.  Once we got there. She seemed a bit nervous. I looked over at her and from her smile I knew I did not need to ask if she was ready to go inside.  I grabbed her hand and escorted her in. Standing close to me. We found a booth. One of the bigger booths for Both of us to be able to maneuver around. We got comfortable. I dropped some coins in and clicked on a movie. I unbuttoned her blouse then proceeded to play with her tits. She Pulled out my cock with a huge smile( she has a great smile). She started sucking . There were people knocking on the door, asking to join and trying to get in. I asked her if she wanted company and she said, not this time. Maybe next time. I then enjoyed her mouth as she was doing a fantastic job. After a few minutes I pulled out my cock from her mouth and bent her over.  I enjoyed her wet willing cunt for a while, before pulling it out and rubbin it on her ass hole.  I pumped my cock in and out of her tight wet shaved pussy a few times.  Every few strokes I would pull out and I  would pull it out, And rub it on her tight little asshole. Then back in her pussy, this went for a few minutes.  Fucking her pussy or should i say cunt? I pulled my cock out again. I  rubbed it against her asshole a few more times. Just lubing it up and relaxing it a little as I did this a few more times. She was moaning. I pulled out my cock and put the head against her puckered rosebud.  I started pushing slowly but firm. I pushed until I felt the first ring of resistance give away. The head of my cock was now in her ass.  I let her ass  adjust,  and relax. Pulled it out and back in slowly a few times. My cock started to go in deeper and deeper and then I hit the second ring of resistance. I applied a little bit of pressure and pop I was in!   I was busy, pounding her ass when some asshole picked the lock on the door. And tried to get in.He was peeking in the door. Begging to come in and watch. I asked Weda what she wanted, She said, no. So we kept him and the others outside. And pull the door shut. I continued to  enjoy her. I was fucking her towards the so hard and deep you could hear our bodies slaming together. I came deep in her ass and almost lost my footing since I was fully drained. We relaxed for a few minutes. Watched a bit more of the movie. We walked out hand in hand. There was a group of about seven pervys who had been listening and asking if they could join us in the booth.  A couple of them followed us asking if we were done and leaving, hoping they could get some time with my girl.  I walked her to my truck. Drove her back to her truck. And we both went on our merry way.  with smiles on our faces.   Another bucket list item had been checked off her list.

Prospective slave's Friend Requests In My search for a total slave, I have had several make a "Friend" request of Me. I tire of explaining to each and every prospective pieces of chattel that I am not looking for a 'friend.' Indeed a slave of mine would never be a friend, buddy, lover or social equal of any kind. To illustrate, I explain that if I walked into a public Men's room and surveyed the line up of porcelain urinals I would not be looking for a 'friend.' Nor would I expect to treat any of the appliances like a lover. In fact if the prospective slave were kneeling with its mouth open in the line up of other urinals, I may choose to ignore it for any of a number of utilitarian reasons, like maybe its face was particularly filthy with urine, ejaculate or even human waste and covered with flys. And, speaking of human urinals, I do like to hear effusive gratitude for the slave's opportunity to be of service to a Better, but, a sign above it, if speech were impaired by say a spider gag, would work as well. Master James

"A woman that finances her own lifestyle and cultivates her own peace, has zero fear of being alone. She does not fear the solitude.  She fears the exhaustion of investing her time in a man who yields no return on the investment.  She knows the relationship is supposed to be a partnership of power.  Not a constant drainage of her energy into someone elses mess.  A man's role is to provide emotional safety and support direction.  Not to bring more confusion and problems for her to solve. She is focused on her own evolution.  She is not focused on raising a grown man who never mastered self leadership.  If you are not adding value to the table she built with her own hands?  You are a distraction she cannot afford to keep around.  She would rather be the CEO of her own life now than the rehabiliation center for yours.  She realized at some point that fixing you requires breaking herself.  That is a trade she is no longer willing to make.  She has retired from the job of raising of men.  She has started the business of raisting her own standard.  Both projects do not fit on the same calander.  The seat next to her is reserved for her partner who multiples her power.  Not one who divides her attnetion.  She did not work this hard to build her own life just to treated it like a hotel where you to check in when it is convenient.  The door is still open.  Admission just went up.  And you have willing to meet it with effort with consistency and emotional maturity. If you cannot meet her where she is?  The right move is to keep walking.  She is not going to lower herself to make you comfortable. She is not going to dim her light so your insecurity can rest easier at night.  That phase of her life is over for good.  Either step up to where she is now or get out of her way. So that the man who can step up has room to find her.  The waiting list is not as long as you think. The women like her do not wait around long. The right men recognizes them on sight."  -Hard Truth Talks 

In Regards to Domestic Servitude If you are wondering what some of the tasks will be, here is a list: Doing the chores, cleaning, and errands to include: Picking up packages, groceries, dry cleaning Changing the bed sheets, maintaining and putting the laundry away Keeping the closets organized  Watering the plants Draw my bath and pull down the bed covers To be a Chauffeur  Wait on and pamper me Massages Foot and Body Worship

Awaken to gentle licks upon my labia and the tickle of your facial hair on my inner thighs  You knowing my body and realizing that sucking my clit is not what gets me going  But that gentle tongue massage on my lower lips causes me to softly moan and drip with wetness  I'm in the euphoria of emotional bliss  Slow intense grinding along with the need to run  I'm about to explode  What a way to wake up,  as the main course I've trained you well and you know how to please  Now, I will lay you back, tie you up, or leave you free  I know before I'm done you'll be screaming please!

 I am at a point in my life where I have no interest in games. I’m searching for something real, something that can grow and prosper into a long-term, real-life Female-Led Relationship (FLR). I’m not looking for online fantasies or time-wasters. I am looking for a man whose passion for submission and surrender matches my passion for Dominance and control. I am a beautiful, bossy woman — confident, and unashamedly powerful. I know what I want, and I expect a man who knows how to follow direction and take pleasure in service. A man who can worship a woman’s power, not just admire it from afar. Fitness, discipline, and intellect are important to me. I keep myself in shape and expect a man who values his health as much as I do. I enjoy travel, fine dining, exploring cultures, and curating experiences that delight all the senses. I live a life of freedom and choice, and I am willing to share that with the right submissive man who earns his place by my side (and at my feet). The man I’m looking for should be respectful, self-aware, and able to balance strength with surrender. Emotional support, companionship, and intelligent conversation are just as valuable to me as physical service. You should be well-mannered, attentive, and serious about building something real. My tastes in kink are wide-ranging — Bondage, CFNM, tease and denial, chastity, worship, CBT, strap-on play, humiliation, and more — but my greatest pleasure comes from a submissive man who focuses on my enjoyment first and finds fulfillment in pleasing me. If you’re truly serious,  and understand the difference between fantasy and reality, then send me a message. Be prepared to introduce yourself properly and explain how you intend to serve and grow under my direction. Only quality men who crave a real FLR need apply.

I don't really like doing "negative space" posts, but a few things:   I do not do "sessions".  I'm not a prodomme, I'm not interested in casual anything.  If I pursue something, its because I think it has potential for an ongoing dynamic of substance.  I'm also not a findomme, and have no interest in folks whose primary motivation is in that realm.  Doms - some of your cohort are giving you a seriously bad name.  Here's what keeps happening. A Dom contacts me, says they want to do the equivalent of talking shop.  Within a few exchanges they're pushing boundaries, either telling me they want to flip the and sub, or telling me how wonderful they are and bragging all around, or in one case, attempting to pathologize my own participation in the lifestyle and dismissing any woman with interests in this realm.  Guys, don't do this.  It just makes you look bad, and I'm happy to use the block button when things go down that path.  You're here on a site for finding people who complement  your preferred power orientation. Go forth! Pursue them!  Have fun!  Just leave the Dommes alone, we're not buying.  Geez, what else.   Please be ready to engage in conversation of substance.  I'm not looking to chat forever, but I am looking to chat until I can see that you are a consistent, reliable, engaging individual who can connect with me on a materially significant level.  I'm not going to invite you to my off-site world unless I feel you've proven those things, because I don't need fifteen "hi" messages a day blowing up my phone from folks who don't bother to string together a full sentence.    Ahh, venting complete.  I might even delete this later, but for the moment, it needed to be said.    

Since I've gotten a lot of inquiries from Men, let me make it clear; You must be within the NYC metro area or close (Jersey, PA, Connecticut) I am open to being a sissy slave for the right man, perhaps even the potential to become my Master in a long term relationship. I'm into men who have experience in handling a sissy, and I'm interested in exploring pony/puppy play.  My prefence in a potential Master is a large man who is aged 45-55..In a potential Master, I like darker Men who are naturally hairy.. Also a Master who has experience in bondage and is able to properly tie me up whether it's with ropes or chains. He would also lock me in chastity as his sissy slave and have me yearning to take his cock in either hole on demand.

Something must be wrong with me I have wandered out amongst the wolves lately... I kinda knew what would happen but like everyone, I hoped for different... I hoped to find that hidden jewel standing in the shadows like I typically do, alas fools gold emerged... In my submission the power dynamic is very important, ( I do voice this upon meeting) I think it’s taken with a grain of salt but I communicate and try to warn of my insecure Self Protective Dominant Nature... I scream that I live my vanilla life in Top Space, I live there everyday, I have responsibilities there, deadlines, decisions, must do’s and I hold myself accountable to be all things and do all things... I can be quite aggressive in this world ( I’ve learned to live in ). I’m not sure these days if I’m actually conveying this or if it’s in my head .... Like a movie that plays in the background while you are thinking or doing something else. You say your a Dominant / Master or even Top... I say I’m looking for a part time arrangement because I’m married in an open relationship... He is not a Dominant / Master however he is my Alpha. I am given free license to fulfill my cravings as long as it doesn’t interfere with my marriage... ( I will admit pretty cool and I’m thankful) I love my Husband and I do serve him too ... not sure he understands it all the time but if it wasn’t for my submission to him, I would have ran a long time ago... He holds very strong with me and he does remind me of who is in charge... I then advise of my personality and my need to relinquish control but that a foundation must be built with me due to needing to trust you. I advise you about my role in my everyday life... Yes there is a lot about me ( sorry I’m so complicated) Then we start to get to know one another ... You agree this can be accomplished ... (Maybe in wishful thinking, we all have periods of that) you read my journals I’m open and honest with you. I speak of my short comings honestly I understand I’m a lot to take on ... I try to be as good as possible until you start to ask me questions or speak about techniques you don’t understand .... I try to explain. What I know ... I find out you have done no research in the lifestyle and have not reached out to anyone / or attended anything. The Power Dynamic shifts due to your lack of knowledge and I become the teacher .... Things then fall apart for me, I try to rationalize you are human and give you allowances for that .... but no I have periods of top space that go unchecked ... things crumble This is my journey ... this is why I walk away ... This is why you might see me out and then I disappear... I love this lifestyle but I will say it is the hardest thing to understand in my life... Each time this happens it takes a lot of me, leaving me empty, sad and like something is wrong with me .... Tags: (add) Aug 15, 2018

On the twelfth day of Kinkmas my true sub got from me:Twelve spankers spankingEleven croppers croppingTen paddlers paddlingNine caners caningEight maids a milkingSeven floggers floggingSix whippers whippingFive Ben Wa ballsFour anal beadsThree stuffed holesTwo nipple clampsAnd a red butt over my knee.

Here’s a sensual, evocative poem that embraces intimacy and desire. **Kindling** Come closer, and let silence speak,   In whispers soft, in touches sleek.   Your breath against my skin, so near,   Ignites the spark, dissolves the fear.   Fingertips trace in whispered lines,   Mapping secrets, as bodies entwine.   With each soft touch, we come undone,   Bound together 'til night is spun.   In this dark world, we’ve found our place,   Time slows to linger, breathes to taste.   The ache of longing fades to peace,   In arms that hold and will not cease.   We meet like fire, we burn like sun,   Two shadows melding, joined as one.   Lost in rhythm, a timeless flight,   In whispered heat, through endless night.    

I met a Dom on Fet Life who has been keeping me in line the last few weeks. He is not a nice person. I don't really like Him, but as a Dom and potential Master, He is exactly what I need. I've been processing this phenomenon, putting much thought into why I respond to Him so well as a Dom, even though I wouldn't choose to spend time with Him otherwise (and I'm sure it's mutual). I cannot count the number of Doms, Masters, Gods, Slave Owners, etc. that I've met both online and in person who seem unwilling or incapable of issuing an order or command. I tend to follow orders. If I don't receive any, I assume the Dom is uninterested and I move on. Aftter all, it is my job to follow orders, not to issue them. The Man that I am currently serving does not have this problem. I obey all His orders without question, even those I don't want to. It's not my job to choose which orders to follow. If you identify as a slave and you're having trouble attracting potential Masters, maybe you should take a look at your profile and count how many times "me" or "I" appear in your text. Then skim your profile for anything that would tell a potential Master what you could do for Him. Learn much?

I must be a masochist, because I can't seem to leave this site completely, even though I know how much it fucking sucks. It's like we're all just trolling the bottom of the barrel of humanity here trying to find a dream partner that doesn't actually exist. And yet, here we all still are, day after fucking day...                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  

110224 The gall of the so called experienced male domestic household servant types - more often then not seeking their next victim for exploitation.  They play to anothers desires, and build a repetiore of information on the women of CollarSpace.  Women tend to be sharing types and often give personal information about family, friends, work, pictures, personal tastes, you name it, and those parasites - they seek it and FEED OFF of it. It is a dangerous person who asks without giving, seeks without meaning, uses for their own desires and has no ability or intention of follow through.  Deception at their core. They leave a bad taste in ones mouth and give good, well intentioned men a harder time of it. When you think of a man here who has literally thousands of screen names - just popping off down the list of his many names, daily, monthly, whatever, in every state, every country, COUNTLESS IDENTIES, throwing out a line to this woman and that, all around the world, gathering sensitive information - critical I imagine sometimes - it is frightful to think of the power this person holds behind the scenes.  Who is he?  Who does he associate with?  How does he use this information?  It would be great to think his antics here are for amusement only, but I can assure you there is nothing amusing about being duped.  There is nothing amusing about someone sharing intimately, gaining your trust, building false beliefs in them.  Nothing amusing about a man submitting himself to you through your desires and through your need.  Imagine a man who says, "hey your mother has Alzheimer's and I have personal and meaningful connections with people who can help - I can help - If you permit Me to serve you to the best of My ability, I will help care for and provide for the well being of your dying parent."  I know - if it sounds to good to be true, then it is.  Still, when you are in the thick of confusion and the unknown, that is when these parasites go in for the kill! WHAT KIND OF BULLSHIT IS THAT?  iS THIS ANOTHER FORM OF EDGE PLAY TO BE EXPECTED IN THESE PARTS?   It is lying, it is fraud, it is deceit at its basest level and it is promoted here thorugh this medium.  I enjoy CollarSpace - I really do appreciate the opportunity which is afforded in order to meet people of similiar mind.  I am grateful for the men I have met who continue to add joy and benefit to My life.  I don't know how to fix this aspect - the preying aspect - the illness which spreads and infects. It is unfortunate that sad lost souls such as this british parasite continue to use this as a feeding ground for their sorry existence and thus I shall continue to attempt to educate others here.  I am a formidable woman and the likes of this cockroach wont undo Me, but I do feel for My sisters and brothers deserve better. Dont we do that which we do to feel better, to give and take more, but where is the ethics behind using another person, AGAINST THEIR WILL?  

ABOUT ME: I'm quirky, blunt, fun, wild, and just a little shattered. My days are sometimes too dark, sometimes too bright, and my nights are sometimes way too long. I am often strangled by my own insecurities as much as I am my over confidence. I require attention, long for passion and wish to be desired, to be lusted after, to be romanced darkly. I use music to speak when words fail me. but words are as important to the writer in me as the air I breathe. I am manic, overly optimistic and a dreamer who finds one beautiful thing about every day, no matter how bad it seemed. And even with all my flaws, even though I am difficult at times, I am worth every second.

As a Dominant CD Gurl I look for a Submissive CD who can be controlled and influenced and is available on a regular schedule. The submissive CD will wear the types of feminine clothes she is told to wear. The types of fabrics and texture of fabrics her Dominant is turned on with. The pastel colors and cute prints on the girlie girl fem clothes. The submissive will fill her CD closet with the clothes her Dominant likes to see her wearing. The submissive will keep her body shaved and sexy smooth. She will have spending money to go shopping on command by her Dominant. She will be Bi-Sexual or Gay. She will enjoy getting spanked. She will not be a slave but will serve and service her Dominant on a regular schedule. So far the Vanilla Lives seem to get in the way for finding this submissive CD Gurl?

Name Change as a Sign  Since ancient times names has been a map to knowing people and places. A name is you in sound. Many societies used multiple names to protect the inner soul and very lives of individuals. Certainly secret societies, religions, and associations use name change as a way to signal a change of life and alliances. The ideas of acquiring a new name appears in ancient and sacred texts and invariably signal a deeper commitment and a sign of change and transformation. Part of many rites of passage include after the third step, reintegration, the new name. That is why after such rites people speak about the new person that has emerged after the ritual. The name is then a way to mark ownership, commitment, and deep understanding of the individual’s newly acquired status. We tend to give names to those things and individuals that we possess or at least hold a claim to. The selection and bestowing of a name in those circumstances is a provocative moment in which one end of the equation decides (based on his understanding) the name of the individual to be reborn through the new name. The level of intimacy this act requires and entails will bound both individuals beyond their wildest dreams. In this case the Alpha be one Sir, Lord, Master, etc and the sub will take the neme his superior bestows; and in that moment the bond created will be consummated constantly through the word and specifically through sex. 

Simple Life For A slave Written by submissive4dominant its a simple life for a slave. it is removed from the trails and tribulations of the world, it just has one focus, one thing to concentrate its attention on…Master. it can only do its best to follow every order to make life for Master as comfortable, pleasurable and easy as possible. Master has to think, it just has to do.  it has spent the day cleaning, preparing food, working out to make its body attractive for Master, meditating and focusing on how it can be a better slave, maybe practising a new skill it has been told to learn. A text alerts it to the fact that Master is 5 minutes away so it pours His favourite wine and kneels by the door, head bowed.  What happens next will depend on Masters mood. Mostly He will grab the wine, dump His briefcase for the slave to put away and slump onto the sofa. Unless ordered otherwise, the slave will crawl over and carefully remove Masters shoes and give Him an expert foot rub, whilst Master drinks and comes down from the stresses of the day. Of course if it has been a particularly bad day Master might need a different form of attention, need to get rid of His frustrations before He can truly relax. A slap to the kneeling slave as He comes in is the signal that it should go and position itself below the frame, offer its body for Master to release His tension on.  Yes, its a simple life. the slave just needs to live in the moment, it never knows what to expect, doesn’t need to..it just accepts, just obeys. Will it be slapped, will it be stroked…it doesn’t matter each comforts it, lets it know it is fulfilling its purpose in life. 

I'll give you a little hint too.  I get a LOT of contacts here. Many are polite and interested in me, at least until they realize I'm not gonna show them my junk on cam within the first 24 hours after they say they are a real true Dom! LOL So often the proof is in the engagement, the talking, the conversations, the eventual move off of this platform to one where we can take the next steps.  I should not be expected to carry that load myself. Matter of fact, I expect the Dominant to take the lead here after all they contacted me. If I say yes, I'd like to get to know you, I expect conversation, asking questions, sharing FetLife profiles, etc. etc. etc. whatever it takes to see and feel if there is a common and mutual spark worth pursuing.  I of course have many of my own questions and comments and I will most certainly share those.  I WANT to find my man/Dominant/Master! So this should be a labor of love for both of us. I look forward to hearing from you! 

Let’s speak on something most avoid. What is the point of control, if there is no purpose behind it? To take responsibility for someone, whether you call them a submissive, a slave, or anything else, and then leave them without direction, is not power, it’s mismanagement. Service is meant to be useful. Without purpose, without structure, without a defined role, that energy has nowhere to go, and over time it deteriorates, focus fades, discipline weakens, and what could have been something valuable becomes wasted potential. So I ask, You say you “own” them, now what? What is their routine, what are they responsible for, what are they building under your direction, what is the outcome you’re working toward? Because in any real system, any kingdom, any structure, everyone has a place. A role, a function, a reason they exist within it. Without that, you’re not leading, you’re collecting. And that’s where most fail. If your life cannot function without them, then who is truly in control? If their only purpose is to sustain you financially, then what happens when they step away? You haven’t built anything, you’ve created dependency. And dependency is fragile. Real power is stability, it’s structure, it’s having your world in order first, so that anything added to it strengthens it, not holds it together. So this is the challenge, Get clear, get structured, get intentional. Because if you’re going to take responsibility for someone else, You should already know what to do with it. — Mistress Nikki Vixen

I am dumbfounded by the number of female submissive, on this site, who in an act of straight out dominance insist on integrating a core component of the vanilla lifestyle into the lifestyle developed from the writings of the Marquis de Sade. Especially, when that vanilla component is the antithesis of The Marquis' work and why he theorized women were too inhibited to wantonly explore their complete sexual response. De Sade observed that emotional love was like a drug (turns out to be oxytocin) that wore off and eventually left the woman disenchanted as her resistance to the hormone built up and the man’s efforts to re-create the first dose becomes more and more difficult. To the point, that eventually, the man quits trying and seeks out a woman who will fuck him like his wife did initially and validate his efforts. So now, the women has a legitimate reason to look elsewhere for that dose of that initial oxytocin. Which only happens a few times in each relationship, and if it happens, it’s always happens in the beginning. And, the more she gets of it (oxytocin) the more immune she becomes to it’s affect. This means, that by building on a foundation of emotional love, women are essentially setting a time bomb underneath the relationships entire foundation, as well as inhibiting their own sexual being.

Let us play the Let's Pretend game.  (I love the Let's Pretend game!)   Let's pretend that the people typing these profiles and journals and adding pictures and stuff are REAL PEOPLE.  Yup, that might be a bigger ask than is possible.  But let's pretend that is the truth.  It certainly must be for some of us, yes?   Let's further pretend that those who can be defined as real people have been on this site or the predecessor for a while.  Some might have met someone and then UNmet that someone and are back.  Some of those are people who come here lurking but never connecting.  Let's even pretend that some people here are downright serious about all of this but are just having problems connecting with someone they feel is truly compatible.   At the end of the day, however, there is something that we cannot pretend about.  Those of us who are, are real people, with real feelings, and real ambition to eventually find what we want so we don't have to be here any more.  Please take some time to consider others.  Show some respect.  Don't make assumptions about who we are or why we are here.  It can be hard enough without the background noise.   None of us are perfect, and we all have one or two or dozens of flaws.  There is no pretending in the world that can make that not true.  We also have preferences.  Those preferences might very well exclude some these same people who are trying so hard to be right for SOMEONE.  I cannot ask anyone to turn their back on their beliefs or their flaws or their preferences, but what I CAN ask is that we show some kindness, some human dignity.  If anything from the past few years should have taught us is that not only are there trolls online, but many of them started being trolls in real life as well.  People have learned how not to be their best selves.   Be kind.  Be friendly.  MAYBE pretend to think outside the box a little bit.  MAYBE be a little more inclusive, or forgiving those flaws in others that seemed intolerable to you yesterday.  Make someone happy.   I don't want to be the last one here.  Do you?

I cheated on my wife, and I wound up paying for it.   I had gone out on my wife, and my sister-in-law found out about it. She told me she wouldn't tell her sister if I agreed to help her. After all, they weren’t that close, and she knew she could be a bitch. I agreed, and she told me to be at her place on Friday night at 8:00. I asked why, and she said you’ll see.    I got there at 8. She met me at the door and asked if I was ready. I replied, “I guess.” She said, “Here’s the deal: me and some friends are having a toy party, and we need someone to demo the toys on.” I was a little nervous, but she said, “Oh, you will enjoy it, and if you want, you can back out." I couldn't let her tell on me, so I agreed. She said follow me to the den.    When we got there, I saw the fuck bench for the first time. She told me to strip and hop up. I asked what it was for, and she said it would be easier to demo cock and ball toys and lubes or anything else. She said, "Hurry up; the girls will be here anytime." So I did, and she strapped me in and then blindfolded me. I never knew who the women were who were there that night. Let's say that, like my sister-in-law, they had more curves than the women in the following video. And you know how much women with curves excite me.   She left the room, and in no time, I could hear voices coming in the living room. Women laughing and drinking and looking at sex toys. After a while, how long I couldn't tell you because I had lost track of all time, I heard her tell them she had another surprise in the den. I hoped that none of these women got too drunk or knew my wife.   They walked in, and they all couldn't believe it. They told her that when she held a party, she held a party. She told them to get their favorite toy and try it out. I could feel hands rubbing my cock and balls and ass. Before long, I felt the first dildo rubbing my lips and then another, and they just seemed to get bigger and farther down my throat. Finally, I heard her say, “Is anyone going to bust this ass cherry, or am I going to have to bust it myself?” I tried to protest but my words came out all muffled and unintelligible because of the dildo that was shoved into my mouth. She said keep that dick down his throat, girl, to keep him quiet.    Well, she had a strap-on belted already because in just a few seconds, she was behind me squirting lube on my ass and fingering it in, and then I felt her pressing the head of her cock against my helpless asshole. She said you need to relax, and you will enjoy this, I promise. She just kept steady pressure, and it just kept stretching me out until it finally popped in. She was a very muscular and sexy gal, and she worked out every day, so I knew she could give me a very good pounding if she wanted. She wanted. As soon as her cock went in, she started fucking slowly but with increasing speed and depth. Before long, she had her feet up on the bench next to my legs and was squatting fucking me with blistering speed and to the point I could feel the sack of the strap-on bottoming out on me. With the cheers of the women, she only seemed to get faster and harder.    Needless to say, I took several "cocks" in both ends before the night was done. She saw the last woman out, then came back. As she was undoing the restraints, she thanked me for going along with the night and making her so proud in front of her friends. She finished freeing me, leaned over, and kissed me. Not a friendly sister-in-law kiss, but a deep, wet, passionate one, which I returned. Without another word, she led my naked ass to her bedroom. I spent the night, and when I awoke, I knew my marriage was over.   With thousands of porno videos out there, I could not find one with a male on a similar bench, but lots of ones with females on all sorts of benches, swings, chairs, etc. This one is almost like my sister-in-law’s, so I include the link more for explanation than demonstration. The second link is a video of how the night seemed to go for me in my mind.   https://www.etsy.com/listing/1219988334/spanking-bench-sex-bench-bdsm-bench?ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=sex+bench&ref=sr_gallery-1-5&pro=1&organic_search_click=1   https://xhamster.com/videos/anal-extreme-for-kinky-butt-slut-7573248

Embracing my slumber, I feel as though I'm in a dream  The softness of your caress, has me feeling so serene I want to open my eyes to make sure you are real  I will not venture, because I don't want to interrupt what I feel  The moisture begins to flow as my body loses control  You have me at this point and I will never say no  Relaxation and anxiety are about to collide  Multi orgasmic pleasure, I will never hide  WOW!

October 2024 update: Residing in AZ Tempe/Mesa area - On Fetlife as well if wish to interact on that medium.  Quick updates. Health is healthy. All testing up to date as of Oct. 11th 2024. Negative and clean bill of health. CollarSpace is still ancient on profile updating I see. Life updates - Worked as a caregiver for a decade did hospice care, they all have passed on. Planned the funerals for those without families. No longer wish to continue the health care route.  Went into the Trades. Got a job offer out in AZ and leaving CA late November early December. Great second career path and I’m happy to be in a new state with a feeling of newness. Can’t wait for my first monsoon and AZ heatwave.  Notice some profiles here. Bad submissives - Happy to say I paid off every debt and loan ever accumulated. Got new car in full. Coming into a new state with living expenses paid for half the year. Saved up. Will be nice working, learning, and saving.  About me physically - I’m 5’9 and have a smooth/waxed body with a smooth bubble butt. Somewhat above average at 7’ thick cut with low hangers. I am a submissive and like older Dad types. Dad bods. Pretty private. Attractive.  Generally more passive or submissive. I enjoy fitness, health, and exploring new things.   Into 1950's D/s servitude lifestyle of doting and pampering. Enjoy being slightly bullied, pushed around, asked to do things/chores, under foot, subservient younger/Dom Scenario with a Guy -  Enjoy breath play particularly during oral as well as being an overall submissive. Not only just in the bedroom but with him in general; taking notice of his interest and hobbies. Using that to find ways to please him until he feels satisfied with the disappearance of nuance stresses that plague all of us everyday. Having a Dom relax and not worry what he does or says and takes a breather without having to refocus on his sub and their needs is what I like. I get along well with confident dominant types.    Getting to the point where I lower my inhibitions and use my body to bring out the gratification he deserves. To the point where I relax and allow myself to be taken under his control.  I'm a sub male in general. I workout towards a tone fit build over big muscles to have more of a streamline body. - Male/boy. Nice features. This site is a pain on updating anything. 

 emptysoultoown 

Scared off the Dom that It was presently Under consideration too.A Civvie that he didnt keep it confidence and discussed things about it without checking with it first Especially about it Military deployments and active duty.He went to a friend as a sounding board he trusted that person told him that he should run away as fast as he can because of what it has been involved with and committed too on its old life. How fucked up it is mentally and physically because of wars deploying and willingness to sacrificing its life for the greater good to make a difference.He told his friend that It works as a Prostitute to survive after another Dom it sacrificed its careers for to be totally focused on him and later he was found out to be a closet serial killer.And all the medical treatments and surgerys ahead of it. He turned out to be a frightened little rabbit that breaching it trust was the betrayal was so big he knew It couldn't forgive him.