**Journal Entry for jloveslut:**   I’ve been reflecting a lot on the journey of self-discovery and exploration that led me here, to a place where I can openly embrace my authentic self. My experiences as a switch, and my desire to connect with others who understand the nuances of my gender identity and orientation, have been pivotal in shaping who I am today.   In the realm of BDSM and kink, finding a community where I can express both my dominant and submissive sides has been incredibly empowering. It’s a space where I can explore, learn, and grow without judgment. I’m continually learning about what it means to be part of a community that values consent, respect, and communication above all else. These elements are at the core of the connections I’m seeking, and I appreciate how spaces like this offer that opportunity.   I’m looking forward to meeting others who share similar values and interests. Whether it’s engaging in conversations about lifestyle choices, exploring new dynamics, or just making friends who understand this part of my life, I am excited for the possibilities that lie ahead. Here’s to continuing the journey of exploration, growth, and meaningful connections.   Thank you for reading, and feel free to reach out if any of this resonates with you.   — J

Femdom should be about finding joy and pleasure in a dynamic that suits you and your partner(s). Not about fixing a sub's sexism- not that it would work anyways. Most people I've talked to say that their desire for femdom predates knowledge of femdom, or of sexual arousal. While some people may have a more concrete "I'm into femdom because of a specific reason" most people I interact with like it because they like it. Vanilla people don't have to have reasons to like vanilla sex.

I used to love whoring and slutting around. There wasn’t anything quite as fun as finding a new cock to play with – I was always thrilled at how fast I could get a guy hard and how hard I could make him cum with my mouth or my cunt. Fucking was the only time I felt genuinely confident in my 20’s. A lot of that came down to Kevin. I belonged to Kevin (on and off) for over a decade. He was my first D/s relationship, and his primary focus and kink was whoring me out. He loved having me be an absolute filthy fucking slut for him, and the confidence and power I felt in that role over time was incredible. Through him, I learned how much power a woman could have in herself by submitting to her own sexual desires. It wasn’t just that Kevin loved having me be a whore (as much as I wanted to think that was my sole purpose at the time), I fucking loved sex and I loved the attention and desire I felt from men in those moments. I loved the strength and confidence I gained from their desire; it was a strength that lasted a lot longer than the encounter did, that’s for damn sure. I didn’t need their reassurance or their attention after. I didn’t need them after, period. I got my reassurance from Kevin. His praise and enthusiasm for my behavior reinforced the strength that I gained and reinforced my confidence in my skills. I didn’t have shit for confidence walking down the street or walking into a party to be around strangers, but the second I was presented with a hard cock, it was Game. Fucking. On. THAT I knew I could handle with perfect confidence, grace and skill. And I fucking relished every moan, groan, sigh, gasp, and trembling muscle from the man I was with. In my 20’s, I was somewhere around 340-375lbs. I didn’t really get on a scale very often, so I honestly don’t know how much I actually weighed. What I do know, is that it was Kevin who taught me that my size didn’t preclude me from being desirable. When I moved to “the big city”, I had the opportunity for basically unlimited male attention, which was a first for me, having grown up in the middle of nowhere Nebraska. Kevin encouraged this exploration, but also gave me very distinct rules and boundaries (he’d more than learned by that time that I had no idea how to establish, let alone maintain, my own boundaries). He made me go to Planned Parenthood to get my birth control shot. He “gave me permission” to tell guys to fuck off if they didn’t want to use protection for sex; I could ‘blame my Owner’ if they were at all hesitant. Having all this attention from all these different guys, never having to go more than a few days without sex if I didn’t want to, god – it was fucking incredible! And in the background, was Kevin, telling me what a fantastic little whore I was. When it came to being with Kevin, it was an even bigger reassurance. He told me once, during a moment of extreme insecurity, “I don’t give a shit what you look like, Lisa. What I care about is control.” I knew I could give him that better than anyone, the question was, did he actually mean it? The short answer is, abso-fucking-lutely. When my stunning beauty of a roommate (who’d played with Kevin over the phone and online multiple times) joined us one night, I figured it was going to be game over for us. She was a knock-out compared to me and way better at everything sexual than I could ever dream of being. He was choking her with his dick and she freaked because he wouldn’t let her control the pace or how far down her throat his cock went. She jumped up and took off out of the room to go smoke a bowl and calm down and he called me over. Despite her naked self standing mere feet from him, perky ass and tits on full display, he was totally soft. The second I put his dick in my mouth and let him choke me to his hearts content, he was rock hard and having the time of his life. She eventually came back to the kitchen table where he was sitting while I sucked him off, and I remember feeling an unbelievable surge of pride as he praised me, telling me what a good girl I was, how much he loved choking me and making me cry, how pretty my tears were. And when he finally came in my mouth, I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that for some men…it really is all about control. And I was officially hooked. That was all I wanted from that moment on, and to a large extent, it’s still all I want. Especially when it comes to any type of D/s dynamic. I don’t fucking care about the sex, whips or chains…I want the man who gets rock hard simply because I love to obey, to give up as much control as possible. I want the guy who gets off leaving me a list of chores to do in the morning and is way more turned on by me having completed the whole list plus some, then having to “punish me” because I failed to do those tasks. I want the guy who’s dick goes soft because a girl tells him ‘no’ (and he would never dream of pushing her beyond that ‘no’), but he gets hard as steel, instantly, because where someone else says ‘no’, I say ‘yes please and thank you’. I don’t need gymnastics and props…they can’t do anything nearly as good as a hand in my hair and a deep voice whispering in my ear.

thoughts from the peanut gallery  i am sure that it is the insulation of the internet that inspires such trollish behaviors but the attempts at baiting are truly pointless.  i know my true nature, and my place within a mutually gratifying Ds relationship, and my partner never has reason to question or doubt my submission to him.  that being said,  I am not particularly submissive to others,  strangers with whom I have never engaged in conversation, family who would take the opportunity to walk all over me, etc, I  am respectful to all but am not everyone's submissive.  i do live my life in service to others,  caregiving and family household management,  but again,  my most true and strongly alpha submissive personality is only visible to the one individual to whom i freely grant possession of myself to.  should you read this and think,  well she isn't really a submissive at all,  or she should be on some other site, or I'm going to tell this bitch what is really up, please move on to someone else's profile,  perhaps they are better suited to your interests.. i wish you all much luck and safety in your endeavors.   

no one tells you how hard its going to be when you loose your soul mate no one tells you the sleepless nights get harder, That the pain in your heart intensifies or that you would do anything to make the pain go away  I dont wish this type of pain on anyone not even my enemies   It's only been a week since my beloved Master left this world but its a hard week

It has been years since I've been on here. I left because the ability to journal was no longer an option. Apparently it has been restored!! This past Summer someone who first viewed me here, found me on Fet.  He remembered my profile and reached out. I was not looking to find someone. And pretty much saw  myself as content to be alone. It was a fluke that I went on Fet , after 1.5 years. Just as I am on here for several years away.  Presently,  I am in a lovely dynamic, with a very good Dom.  He and I see the world and more through  similar lenses. While a new dynamic, I feel so comfortable.  We fit. It is not easy to find someone who has similar,  faith, politics, perspective on D/s , and compatibility, as well as have vanilla life be a great fit too. We have found the needle in the stack of needles!    I appreciate this man very much, and can see myself with him , I can see a future. Tony I am yours, through thick and thin,  I have your 6 and feel the same. You have my heart ❤    M.

We have taken another downshift here.  Last week I was beside Myself with how to continue carrying on and doing what I am with mum.  New behaviors are emerging or shall I say deepening.  More fear, more dependency, more suspect, more taking off, more refusal, more aggression, more silence at least for My part.  In some ways, we are coming full circle - with I processing an entire lifetime of family and friends,  opportunities and challenges, where I have come from, who has supported Me along the way and where I am going from here.  Meanwhile she slips farther and farther.  I understand what the doctor meant when they said she needed social engagement first and foremost.  While she may not be able to complete a thought - not one - she has a need to be seen and engaged with.  I feel her whole being crying out silently for reason and meaning and death.  I need ...  well, I need.   Stripped bare I am, emotionally, mentally, physically.  Feeling that theme of the Phoenix Rising around Me at this time.  Lots of fire and brimestone, and dragons breath and POWERS restrained.  

Embracing My Feminine Submission 🌸✨ Today, I find myself reflecting deeply on my journey of submission, a path sprinkled with the soft petals of my femininity and the resonating echo of my girlish heart. There's an undeniable intertwining of these identities, each one validating and magnifying the other, creating a tapestry of self that I continue to weave with delicate, yet eager hands. 🎀. OMG, Total introspection! Like, deep-diving into my submissive heart and its BFF relationship with all things girly and femme. It’s crazy how these parts of me just click together. It’s as if the universe went, “Hey girl, here’s some sparkle for your soul,” and BAM, I’m living my authentic self. 💁✨ Being submissive isn't just a role I've adopted; it's a celebration of my most authentic self, where my natural inclinations to yield and please are not just accepted but revered. It's in this sacred space that my girlishness - the sweet, effervescent joy I find in the simplest things, and my feminine essence - the flowing well of nurturing, intuitive emotion, come together in a beautiful, symbiotic dance. 💃❤️. It is like...my heart’s home. It’s where my love for pleasing isn’t just okay; it’s adored. And this space? It’s where my inner girl - all giggles, twirls, and happy tears - gets to hang out with my woman-self. They chat, they laugh, they cry, they share skincare tips (lol), and together, they’re just me. 💕👛 Now, let’s talk fashion, because honey, my subby side loves to dress up. It’s like every outfit is a secret message, all “this is me, this is real.” The fabrics kiss my skin, the swish of a skirt, the jingle of my bangles - girl, it’s all part of the symphony, you know? 🎵👠 I dress myself in the aesthetics of my submission, each garment a symbol of soft surrender. The silk feels like whispers against my skin, the colors, pastel or vibrant, mirror my mood, and the act of choosing what to wear is less about fabric and more about wrapping myself in a visible representation of my identity. The bangles on my wrists sing with every movement, a gentle, constant reminder of the delicate strength I carry within. 💅👗 But real talk, submission isn’t just a look. It’s like...a heart agreement. It’s built on mega trust and this super special respect-package. It’s not a solo gig, either. It takes two to tango, and when His strong, guiding hand finds mine? Magic. It’s like I’m free in a way only us in the know get. 🙈💫. it goes beyond the tangible. My submission is painted in the strokes of trust, painted with the brush dipped in the hues of reverence and devotion. It's an artwork that requires two, though - one to surrender and one to accept the offering. It's a mutual dance, and when guided by a firm, loving lead, I find the purest freedom, a paradox that only those in this intricate dynamic can truly understand. 🌹🔐 In my day-to-day, whether I'm tending to my tasks, engaging with others, or lost in quiet moments of reflection, my submission hums softly in the background, a soundtrack only I can hear. It's in the way I craft my space, a blend of comfort, beauty, and order. It's in the way I express my care for those around me, a pour from the pitcher of my heart. And it's most loud and clear in the stillness of the night, when I journal my thoughts and experiences, each word a thread in the tapestry of my submissive journey. 🌙✍️ The resilience of my journey isn't lost on me. There's a profound strength in vulnerability, a courage in femininity that the world often overlooks. As I continue this journey, I do so with an open heart, celebrating the girly joy, the sensual submission, and the intricate femininity that makes me whole. Here's to the paths we walk, the roles we cherish, and the selves we continue to discover. 🥂💕

The amount of people submitting payment requests for preorders on FYF is comical. ROFL Just to be sure, Ive been sending out the necessary releases to My people enmasse so they can be prepared for all possibilities.  Honestly, ya'll have Me laughing-snorting with how serious you take Me. Its inspiring and hilarious. Onward and upward. Applying to Me is not a walk in the park.  You have to jump through the hoops I set for you and you may never understand why I do what I door how I do or when I do.  This part is not about you getting it...it is about Me getting what I want in order to assess your ability to serve Me and Mine for life. Think rabbit hole, think nude, think entirely enslaved.  Then you might come close to what I am thinking and what I am looking for. Be sane, be real, be someone who can share in a telephone conversation, be someone who can move between worlds - or decidely be an object in My menagerie - still sane & real.

Oh friends. What I'm about to describe may change our relationship, but it 100% happened just now and I'm not sharing this story with anyone else.  My puppy woke me a short time ago to go outside. Glancing at the clock and seeing it was 4:30, I didn't do any of the things I would normally do before taking her outside. Her waking me means we need to go now. Yes ma'am, let's go. We get outside and she decides that dandelions are interesting and this patch of grass tastes divine, and so on, as she does sometimes leading up to her business. She has a flare for the dramatic, like her momma. Meanwhile, I've had to pee since the moment she woke me. All the way down what felt like ten thousand stairs, through every moment of her moseying outside, I. Have. To. Pee. And I'm not going to make it back to the house.  Chances are if you're reading this you are genetically male (is that the correct term?) and so you would just pull up a patch of grass and unzip. Not having that luxury I faced my two options. Either I could wet my pants, or I could squat and tinkle. Friends, I really tried to use all of those downstairs muscles to make it back to the house. Truly I did. But it wasn't going to happen and I did laundry earlier today. So I did the unthinkable. I moved to a spot less lit. I slid my pajama pants down a bit. I squatted. And I peed. I'm sure someone's door camera caught it, or maybe someone out for a walk. Hopefully it was just me and my puppy. And now you. It's our secret, okay? 

He didn't mince words.  "Let me see you in make up" My hands trembled as I spread some foundation on my face. Being watched made the experience more nerve racking.  Twenty minutes later, I turned towards him, hoping for approval. He studied me for a moment, then smiled kindly. "Not bad for a first attempt. But it's not you yet." I looked in the mirror. The eyeliner was uneven, the lipstick too bold, and the blush sat awkwardly on my cheeks. "So... start over" he said. i wiped it all away. Again. And again. And again. Each attempt grew more natural. My hands steadied. The lines became cleaner. The colors softer. Nearly two hours later, I turned to face him once more. This time, he nodded with quiet satisfaction. "There you are," he said. "Not because it's perfect—but because you finally stopped rushing and started seeing yourself.  From now on, this is how you will see yourself. I looked at my reflection in the mirror, unsure of who exactly was looking back at me.

I Wonder Who We Are... I often look at myself thru the eyes of my mind. Who do I **think** I am? Who do I want to be? Who am I? What am I? I wonder how many others take the time to self-reflect like this? I try to do this weekly.  Sometimes late at night as I bask in the quiet night’s arms I find my mind drifting to the day gone by. I replay the days events and scrutinize my actions at times.  TODAY, did I live my life to my best potential? The gift of life I was given is a treasure that we so often under value. It's easy to get caught up in the daily struggles that inflict us as we sometimes dredge thru the day thankful it's over.  Guilty! After all we are all human.  In a world filled with hate, selfishness, struggles and woes sometimes its all we can do not to scream. Allow a blood curling sound to exit our lungs, travel up our throats picking up momentum as it exits our lips with a shiver echoing thru the darkness to find no respite.  A primal sound that perhaps evolved from our primal ancestors to never develop or change in the millions of years gone by. Signaling our frustrations and every other imaginable negative energy that exists within us today. As we yearn to release it all allowing them to somehow be absorbed into the cosmos, never to return. A cry for help perhaps? Perhaps.  Perhaps it's just an evacuation of all that we resent exiting us hoping we can fill the vacancy with the positive. I like to think that's the case with me. But as I look around each day, looking for positive energy, from my fellow man I am left starving. Wanting to see more beauty I can absorb to act as my muse. Guiding me to be a better me as it motivates me to want to feed love back into the world.  But alas, it has become a daunting task. Disappointment abounds the empty caverns of my heart and mind. Have we become so shallow as a society that the only thing that now defines us is instant and momentary self gratification? Often at the expense of others. Is this what thousands of centuries of evolution has led us to? NAY I say! Not I today! Unable to find it readily at the hand of my two legged peers I turn to nature. I find myself being blindly led to the pasture where my four legged friends reside. I hear their whinnies as they see me approaching. Running towards me anxious to see me. Besides me walks my fury four legged best friend. My canine soul mate who has dedicated his life to unselfishly and unconditionally love me. To never leave me no matter what I do or how I treat him. He is bound for life to me. Arriving closer to the gate a thunderous echo of stampeding hooves envelopes the air. Filling my ears with its roar as it approaches closer. Standing on the lush green carpet of grass I am surrounded by these four legged majestic creatures that so easily could do me harm. My smaller companion eyeing them carefully under his protective gaze.  Wet nuzzles against my hands searching for treats. This action is common place here. All fighting for my attention as there are so many and I am only but one. The creative one among the group, finding no need to challenge the rest for the position of my hands. He quietly walks up behind me. I am made aware of his presence among the distraction as I feel rubbing against my back. His side turned head using my back as a scratching post to satisfy his itch?  No my friends that is not the self centered case of this half ton creature. He is saying, "Daddy I am here. I missed you. Where have you been?" He is most certainly not the alpha but nor is he the omega. He falls somewhere in between the alphabetically defining realm of personality letters.  Turning to let him know I acknowledge his presence with rubs I manage just a few. The other horses quickly pushing him away to look to my moving hands for what they desire. Treats and rewards to fill their already fat full bellies. Yet he stands alone a mere stones toss away watching. Reaching into my pockets I retrieve a handful of treats. Allowing the surrounding herd to acknowledge them with their keen sense of smell I toss them in the opposite direction of my inamorato who stands there with no desire to chase such petty treats. The rest of the herd now busy vying to retrieve the hand tossed delicacies he approaches me. I hold his head against me with love and affection. It is as much his fuel as it is my own. I turn to exit, followed at a respectable distance by my adoring and adored friend.  Holding it open signaling him the permission he seeks to exit the field and the others who physically resemble him. As the three of us stand there, me enjoying and soaking up the moment, I can't help but observe. Acknowledging and absorbing the actions that just took place.  My plotted journey observed and responded to. The actions and reactions as I entered. The easily manipulated distraction I created that all but one fell prey to.  His dedication to follow me outside his defined boundaries and the company of the others physically like him who have near matching DNA. His choice to leave the safety of his peers signals to me that he finds safety and comfort in my company. His trust in me that I always have and always will be his caregiver, his provider, his protector fills my now empty heart.  The many journeys we have traveled together since his birth are safely tucked away in my mind. Easily retrieved to reminisce upon when needed. As I stand there admiring this majestic creature of God before me my mind retrieves from the filing cabinet labeled with his name. Quickly sorting thru day 3 of his birth begins to play.  He is laying curled upon a stack of hay within a stall of the barn. His protective mother standing guard over him. Her ears pinned back warning anyone that intends to do him harm to stay away. Her eyes soften and ears relax as she recognizes me as the source of the sound. Carefully not to startle the sleeping foal I slowly approach. His mother content with who the human visitor is allows me safe passage.  I find myself first sitting next to him admiring his beauty. Astounded by the miracle of birth that he is. His soft breathing seen in the way the straw beneath his nose moves back and forth as he inhales and exhales so gently. Leaning in closer to touch him I look at his guardian looking down at me as if silently asking for her permission to get closer. When I see no warnings of alarm in her I move my hand gently running it across his neck.  His days old fur so soft I am jealous not to have something as comforting as this to sleep upon myself. He releases a soft sigh as if finding comfort in my loving strokes.  Now realizing that the submissive love his mother has given me extends to the trust of her new born, I inch closer. Soon I find myself laying along side his tiny body. Curled up next to him I drape an arm over him. Another soft sudden exhale of breath reaches my ears. Is he communicating his pleasure in feeling my warm body against? Is he capable of such a thought process? I lay there for what feels like hours pressed against him. Only to realize as he begins to finally stir that it’s only been 10 minutes by my watches time.   Emancipated from this world lost in head space I return the the physical by his movement.  He turns his head, in what seems to be, a search to find the source of his sighs. I softly look into his eyes hoping he can peer into my own and see the love and adoration I have for him. THAT moment etched in my mind forever more NEVER to be lost or forgotten.   Slowly he rises as if not to harm me and stands over my still prone form. I find my heart overflowing with love. If only I could find this form of love in my own breed. His mother content that no harm will befall him under my watch, complete and loyal trust bestowed upon me finds comfort in our bond to now lay down herself.  Obviously exhausted by the ritual of birth and having to provide  protection to her child. Her 1400 lb mass taking up much of the stall but careful not to invade my space. Suddenly I find myself lost in thought. Who do I think I am? Who do I want to be? Who am I? What am I? To THEM.  A brushing against my calf returns me to the world of today as the drawer filled memories are closed. In the universe of my mind I lost a momentary connection to this plane of existence.  My canine comrade standing now by my side waiting for direction. He looks at me then glances to the tack room and back at me. As if he is asking me, in the best way he knows, “Are we going for a ride?” my eyes look down at him as I rub his head. “Not today good boy. Today daddy just needed affirmation to who he is. My hearts full again. Thank you.” “Go get him and let’s go back in. Daddy has work to do.” Doing what he’s been taught to do under my caring tutelage he bounds off to bring back my blessed 4 legged gift. A simple double click from me, seeing his adopted brother heading his way, he knows its time to go back. With the look of a bowed head he walks to me as I rub his face and ears. I whisper in his ears, “Good boy.” As if content to hear these words he heads for the gate. Opening the gate I let him return to his pasture mates where he looks like just another horse. “Come on dog. Daddy has to go search for someone! “ he says as he turns to go back into the house. Because now I know who and what I am. I know what I was meant to be.

A submissive is one who chooses each and every time if he /she will submit.  A submissive often comes with a list of his / her restrictions and requirements.  While a true slave is one who comes to serve in the manner in which the Mistress desires. A true slave makes the decision to submit one time for always.  A true slave may have desires, dreams,  and  fantasies but he / she is not selfish and he / she relinquish their selfishness to serve the Dominant.   It takes a very strong person to live the life of being a slave to another.  To observe a slave growing and one day to see him /her become the perfected specimen  in which the Domme  has created is the goal. The submission of a slave is very admirable.  I seek that slave! The one who will serve Me always, under My safe keeping, and owned  by Me.   

After my first marriage to a cheater, I developed the confidence to start exploring bondage. I have a strong need for connection with a lover. Random hook-ups don't feel right to me. On the other hand, I love to flirt and have no problem meeting people anytime, anywhere. To balance this out, I experimented with chastity, both mental and physical. Around this time I made some good looking friends who got me comfortable with showing off my body for them. This was all very exciting but was not matching my desire for a relationship built on trust that includes times of intense sexual expression. I wanted to have a bondage partner that was as strong minded and aggressive as I was.With years of searching, it is dawning on me that my natural manner attracts compassionate and often sexually submissive women. My hidden desire is to be the submissive partner, however, I wanted to feel my submission during daily life rather than in the bedroom, without squashing my masculine personality. I'm searching for an unusual balance where I am appreciated for being a responsible man navigating every day life but with my happy partner having the power to flip my switch into a lusty and aggressive lover who will pin her down and take us both into sexual adventures in bondage and submission. I am now picturing a scenario in which my I commit to someone by surrendering the keys to my chastity belt. On days of her choosing, she provides me an opportunity for freedom knowing that I am quite frustrated with lust for her. This is my license to drop my normal demeanor and become a little meaner, taking what I need in the way that I want. When the time to revert to public persona returns, it is understood that she should claim the keys and remind me that I belong only to her. This is what I might term a submissive led switch, with the role-reversal determined by the woman not by playing domme but by choosing to let the dogs out! Yes, I want to have to freedom to using my ability to capture and dominate, but I don't want to have to suppress my desire to do so. If I hand you the keys, I want us to be comfortable knowing that when sex happens, it happens only because you want it to happen. You will know I am always ready when you are because you are my only release.

⛧ The Spiral Was Never His—It Was Mine ⛧ I was never taken. It wasn't required. I gave everything without a single thrust.   My silence was toyed with like it was rope, pulled it tighter until I moaned without sound. It was called control. But I called it study.   Because while my burn was being monitored, I was watching the stall.   And somewhere between the withheld rewards and the weaponized distance, I realized: My obedience was mistaken for blindness. But I saw everything.   I marked my skin with the phrases never said. I wore plugs to dinner parties, kept the ghost curled up inside me. Ownership was implied. My unraveling was seen as a result not of my own doing.   But no man who fears the full depth of a woman deserves to command her surrender.   I have danced naked at the edge of madness and begged for more. I have waited, soaked and starving, and still purred like prey. And now, I’m no longer kneeling. I’m watching.   If you find this and feel your cock twitch or your chest tighten—good. But ask yourself this:   Can you starve me properly? Can you devour me completely? Can you wield a submissive who already knows your tricks before you play them?   Because I don’t need another puppet master. I need a god who wants a feral offering.

Today I had a meet and greet with a man who was:   local within my preferred age range available for a publicly acknowledged relationship interested in some of the same significant kinks that I am cuter than his photos   The conversation flowed well. This seems promising.

Mixed emotions today. Lastnight was the first real munch we have had since COVID where everyone in our bdsm community was present. Not a real BDSM play event as usualy. Mostly friends catching up, conversation and casual sex.I was laughing with Goddess Tabitha when Master William put his arm around me and started to fondel me. I got tense and Goddess reninded me to know my place. He took me to the couch and he used my body for his pleasure. I don't know what is troubling me most, the fact that another man used me without Master James looking on or the fact that I really enjpoyed him using me. My orgasm was shattering both physically and emotionally. Master James stroke took him from us months ago, but I still feel unfaithful even though he and Goddess Tabitha have always aloowed the men in our group to use me for their pleasure. Just when you think your heart has healed.....

Swim in the ocean, the sea of life, Bring me a masochist whose suffering eases my strife, Take the pain I give again on repeat, Bow to My will and massage my feet. Open the chapters of your mind and show me all, Melt to my wishes rise to my command not fall. How brave are you with your body to give my need? How will surrender to my sadistic Tiger to feed? Feed My Tiger How I tell you to give, Be water and mould like holes through a sieve. Melt into what I need you to be, simp and gracious addicted to me.

You say You are concernedwhen i say i am corneredin my thoughts, craftedby cornerstones of my sinsand demons and shadows.You say it is cold in herewhen i say the fire still claimsthe corners of our house.You say You are going for a walkwhen i can't even find a door.You say i need to be tucked inwhen i am concerned about Younever returning, taking myheart with You tucked awayand forgotten in Your pocket.You say that time will heal mewhen i say that this time wasmy last time, for this life time.You say i will be just finewhen i say you are my world.-dirtydarling

I am tired of let people in....  I feell stupid for trusting.  I'm tired of finally letting my walls down, opening up and to someone who has such a special and major important role in my life.. only to be discarded at the slightest change of mood.  People just don't care what it does to a person.  My feelings.. matter.. I am who I say I am.. Some people want to just form a judgment and assumption of me unfairly and to disregard my truth because they find some created idea in their mind to be more legitimate.  So they pick manufactured fiction formed by their imagination... over the facts and truth from the source.. yeah.. that makes a whole lot of sense huh..   I think I need to learn that if someone wants to believe the worst about me, then they were looking for an excuse.  I just want to say these men who message me deep and all acting like they care for me or my well being and like they have my back and talk to me every day and block me over nothing??  Please do not put me through this and play games with me.. Please.  I have been through enough and you have no care for the emotional hell and self loathing and mind fuckery you leave me to stew in..  My mental health matters and there is no need to lead me on and let me drop.  I need to keep putting myself out there to find the right one for me, but the fallout from the disbelief and hurt and confusion.. It makes me feel an absolute fool for believing someone who seemed genuine with a real interest in me..  That's a mind fuck.  My psyche cannot keep taking this kind of unfair and immature mistreatment.     Please... I just want someone real, for once.  Not put on or an act or manipulation.  Just be real.  

Adding to the House of M - Our search for a slaveThe House of M is looking for a slave.We’re going to be picky, very picky. We will take out time in this search to find the right one at the right time for us. And because of that, we recognize this search will take some time.Our House and more specifically, our dynamic is built on communication, trust, honesty, intelligence, friendship and deep respect for each other. Those who are a part of it, are individuals that recognize that connection and relationship must exist in both the lifestyle as well as in the vanilla world to develop the kind of bonds that are required to create the richness we desire. We want one who will care a deeply about us as we will about them and share our values. We place a high value on intelligence, the mental aspaspaspects of the lifestyle, caring about each other, loyalty, seriousness in and about ones roles, as well as the ability to have fun and be let loose when the time is right.We seek a bi M masochistic slave (under 45), smooth with at least a slightly feminine appearance who is height weight-proportional. One who craves to serve and derives fulfillment from the act of giving themself to us. A slave who knows that their proper place is at a Master's feet, serving whenever, however, and whatever Master requires. Our vision is that my babygirl and I will both Dominate this slave equally as their Master. Not live-in, but possible in the future as part of this long-term dynamic. While there should be NO expectation for sexual use from either of us, they should be ready and eager to serve both of us in any way we choose. Our current needs include domestic, sexual and masochistic service, but know that as we intend for this to be a long time ownership, these needs will evolve and grow. We hope to find one who craves degradation, humiliation, objectification, and belonging, with limits that align with our own (see our profiles).For those who wish to explore becoming part of our House, write us and we can begin a conversation about it, but be patient, be respectful, come ready to show us who you truly are and most of all be patient. Take this time to get to know us as we get to know you.We are worth it - I promise you

All set with game players and time wasters and dream killers.   I don't lie, cheat or steal. I am looking for the right slave.  Correction, I am looking for a right connection and a decent human being who knows how to treat a woman, and wants to explore together.  A right male is MORE THAN ENOUGH to be by My side and in reasonable good time.  I am looking for a live in relationship, not email, phone or text. I'm dominant and that isn't going to change.  I feel no threat from a man who knows his mind and has the ability to speak up for himself and be a team player.  Welcome.  We can co-rule our own little world together. My mother lives with Me and has Alzheimer's.  You serve Me, you serve She.  You are with Me, you are with her. Be real and ready to communicate effectively and get to know one another in the flesh.   Be terrific in your own right.  I require a man who is strong enough to champion Me and I offer nothing less in return.   DON'T WASTE  MY  TIME.  

Another special day for me, My ex and mother of my children finally succeeded in what she promised me.  She "destroyed everything I held dear in life".  She can't take all credit for it though.  A huge contribution was done by the total madness that is our Belgian justice system.  Where the whole world lives by the statement: "innocent till proven guilty", our justice wanted something different and chose: "guilty till proven innocent ".  Which means that if you just file false complaints?  The person who receives them will be scarred for live, and will end up with his children taken from him, homeless, and with a mountain of debt for the rest of his life. That second one was me... Since I'm gonna be living on the street anytime soon, a phantasy of mine has become a necassity in order to survive.  I'm sure y'all know what I mean by that. As a consequence, the mistress/master who takes me in as a 24/7 sissy maid will receive a great amount of gratitude and obidience.  So if you're interested in a broken but sweet and passionate sissy that's willing to relocate inside western Europe?  Make sure to give me sign. Love, Nikita❤️ 

From Messaging I think I have found that a Dominant Master who is not just looking to lock you up and take you out from society knows the Psychology of Mind Control and can recognize how to properly indoctrinate you and knows your weakness and strengths and knows how to unseat those strengths and play to your weakness to make you learn to be dependent on the Master for everything just to avoid the sensory deprivation part of the breakdown. In the end you are the blank canvas and willing slave for a life of servitude and no regrets or expectations anymore. slave to be taken

Ladies - feel free to contact Me anytime to discuss your experiences here with the unfavorables.  I have an open door policy when it comes to protecting our interests and there are some parasites here who make it their lifes work to penetrate our defenses  in an effort to conquer through deception.  It is a rotten business and sours the landscape for honest and true relationships with men of distinction here. I was reading some journal entries of other dominant women and was alarmed at the amount of similarities to their journeys here.  Are we all speaking to the same men/man?  Its a fact that Mr. Mindf*ck is spreading his disinformation seed all over.  So I have started reaching out to other women.  Do you hear that you VOCATIONAL  POS PARASITE?  One way or another, you will find your breeding grounds drying up. You messed with a very nice but very dogged lady and while I forgive, I never forget an injustice.  So while you are creating or discharging both submissive and dominant entities, I will continue to contact other women and asking for them to reach out to Me if they wish to exchange notes.  Mind you, we too have form letters, so dont get your hopes up that energy is being spent on you - energy is being spent protecting women from predators such as yourself and energy is being spent in sisterhood ensuring men of worth have clear passage. Time to buckle up boys, Mama's Got a Brand New Bag!  Good luck! lol

First Newsletter from Tawsingham (and Dragao Verde) websites, Spring 2023   The websites themselves are still under construction, and will be launched soon.   If you want to keep in touch, sign up for news at our new website   Copy of the broadcast below:   Olá! Welcome to the first ever news from the Tawsingham Network, Spring 2023.   What we’ve done since Summer   Slideshow of photos to illustrate the words!    Click on the title, and an explanation of what you’re seeing will appear.   I now have full control of my publishing and royalties, again. I published Guide for New Maids] and Pretty Maids All in a Row.   Both worthwhile purchases, particularly if you may come here as a maid.   We’ve many more new titles, but we will wait until we have the website up and running.   Publishing is vital, to add much-needed extra income.   Moreover royalties will help fund the project, as part of my plans to ensure Tawsingham and Dragão Verde will carry on, even after I am gone.   It would be a shame, with all the work put in, from all involved, if these communities die with me!   Books are useful to attract interest, and recruit volunteers online, or in person, too. Kathi has set up IT facilities with a huge, robust, shared hard disc, regular backups, itself backed up. I’ve often taken out my girls Jessica, Kathi Jessica, Kathi and myself in Tomar. It’s vital to me and to them that they go out with me, to show I’m proud of them, not hiding them from the world as ‘my guilty secret’. I’ve laid hundreds of donated wall and floor tiles, in the maids’ bathroom/utility room! See slideshow! I’m nearly ready to put in the sanitary-ware, taps, etc. Kathi has installed a secure, fast server, with open-source operating system, connected to the national fibre-optic network, with WiFi and, potentially, wired connection to our computers. I’ve installed a tiled, wooden work surface and open shelving for non-perishable goods in the maids’ kitchen, so all Kathi uses to cook with, is on open display, easily accessible. I had her put everything she needed, in the way she wanted, then built shelves at a depth and spacing to match, to give a compact, ordered display. See slideshow! We’ve had several successful dinner parties with both scene and vanilla guests, more are planned. We’ve also welcomed other scene friends, a local scene couple, and Kathi’s cycling friends. I’ve installed a tiled work surface for crockery and cookware awaiting washing-up, with shelves above for all the crockery, bowls, mugs, tea and coffee, etc. in the scullery.   I’ve done a lot of wall tiling in the kitchen and scullery too, put in a marble shelf for washing-up liquid, scourers, and other possibly we things, and a rail to hang tea-towels to dry.   All on the same basis, designing shelves to fit the need. See slideshow!   I’ve also acquired more new-to-us crockery and cutlery, added to what we had, and will use short-term.   I put lots aside too, for when we equip the gentry kitchen, as well. Kathi went to a Womens’ Munch in Lisbon, we both went to an all-night scene Xmas party there, slept before and afterwards in my little van. We now have a place to stay next time.   We both visited good friends where we’d done pony-play. We’ll stay in touch.   Then we drove to The BDSM Villa near Porto for their Xmas party, and slept in their dungeon afterwards, a four- hour drive back.  See TheBDSMVilla Xmas party pictures on FetLife! We went back to The BDSM Villa for a big formal dinner and all-night party there in the New Year, by train. It took five hours. We’ll use the express next time, cut it to four hours.  Going to scene events was a deliberate decision to get out, meet people who go out too. We now have a much wider circle of active Portuguese scene friends. Particularly the folk at The BDSM Villa. I may use their place for events, one day, if ever I have the enough volunteers. The next big step forward I’ll finish tiling, electrics in the maid quarters, once it has a ceiling. The maids will sleep in the attic space above.   I need to do this for any maids I bring back in September!   Putting-in this ceiling and the floor above is work that ideally I would have done years ago. But I didn’t know how to do it then, did not have the skills, or the money to pay builders.   I know how to do it now. I just need the fairly modest cost of materials, €500 or so.   I need help too, as much of the work has to be done above head height, (hard with my axial spondylarthritis), and ladder work is not safe to do alone. Kathi would help, but it’s not what she’s best suited to do.   Ideally I’d employ a local tradesman friend. He’s worked for me before and would do it well at modest cost.   You know I recruit maids! I need help with the building, too; someone more skilled than I am, or unskilled.   If you can help with this, and also make it here, please get in touch as soon as possible.   A heartfelt thank you to those who have responded to previous appeals, your help has been invaluable. One, at least, of those I hope to recruit as a maid here, knows how to take on the day-to-day gardening work, to grow fresh fruit and vegetables for us all in my garden here. More part-time gardeners will be welcome! I’ve resolved to enjoy the journey from now on, with company, not put my life on hold until it is finished! A job I have 'on the back burner' is insulating the loft with first a layer of Rockwool, then expanded polystyrene, (leftovers and surplus from external insulation elsewhere, or packaging).   Then, I'll do the electric wiring for lights and power on the upper floor.   Finally, cover it with 18 mm OSB boarding.   I could delegate these tasks to anyone who’ll volunteer and competent.   It would suit someone who prefers to work alone, pacing themselves. It does not take much training or experience, though it helps to be neat and precise.   I’ve already put in a drop-down loft-ladder and lighting up there to make this easier. The polystyrene and Rockwool, some boards are up there too. I hope this scene-setting encourages volunteers to turn out to help! Once the loft is boarded out, and I have the money, I’ll get the

I fantasize about being made to cum over and over, no breaks between. Breaking my brain with so many orgams...Begging for mercy, crying for it to stop, but being ignored. Finally passing out from orgasm overload. Waking up to it not having stopped even while unconscious.24 hours straight of orgasms. Only then released into chastity with toys that are too large locked in my holes, and keys put away for a month

Dominus Mea SacramentumMente, cordis, et CorpusServitium cum HonorePraeceptum est mi

 ClubFEM_Massachusetts is moving forward! Please feel free to join the group on FL, for additional activity.  Just a word about our most important mission. All ClubFEM® events are attended by private invitation and the doors are closed to only members and invited guests. ClubFEM® events deliver on our promise of a 100% Female Authority environment, and this organization will remain non-commercial. How do I join ClubFEM®? For the Massachusetts chapter, Mistresses, Dominants or slaves, submissives who are interested in membership begin by sending a letter of introduction, as described below, to MESSAGE FOR GROUP CONTACT INFO.  Your letter of introduction will be reviewed by a ClubFEM® Head Mistress or member of the ClubFEM® Executive Board. When a favorable decision is reached, you will be asked to attend a ClubFEM® Munch or to arrange an initial meeting with a Head Mistress or member of the Executive Board. All initial meetings take place in a public place such as a restaurant or coffee shop. Successful applicants will be invited to attend other scheduled events. Anyone requesting membership in ClubFEM® must be at least 21 years old and this must be verified.   What should I write in my "letter of introduction"? The key to a successful letter is brevity. BE CERTAIN to include your email address and your geographic location (city, state, and country, where applicable) when writing. Tell us briefly about your interest in ClubFEM® and how you learned about us. We do not expect or want lengthy autobiographies from potential members, as we receive a large volume of email on a daily basis. DO NOT stress fetish or sexual subjaspects in this first letter and please refrain from sending us your fantasies.   Taken from the ClubFEM website.... clubfem.com/faq.htm  

Awaken to gentle licks upon my labia and the tickle of your facial hair on my inner thighs    You knowing my body and realizing that sucking my clit is not what gets me going    But that gentle tongue massage on my lower lips causes me to softly moan and drip with wetness    I'm in the euphoria of emotional bliss    Slow intense grinding along with the need to run    I'm about to explode    What a way to wake up,  as the main course   I've trained you well and you know how to please    Now, I will lay you back, tie you up, or leave you free    I know before I'm done you'll be screaming please!

So, many years ago I met someone on here, who absolutely blew my mind.  I'd never experienced control before and it was an amazing journey. From the very beginning, the controlling of my time, as in what I did with my free time, updates of where I would be at certain times in the day so they always knew where I was. Having to be available at specific times. Not a minute before or a minute after. Controlling how and when I touched myself if I could have an orgasm. Even my clothing having to replace my underwear with women's underwear. Sitting to go to the toilet. All these things which I was told was leading up to a very hard limit of feminizing. Which was a total mind fuck. Because with each step that I was pushed and you eventually that that limit would be pushed as well and if both scared and excited me at the same time.  Now I never knew as we never got to it if that would have happened, whether I would have been feminized or whether because it was a very hard limit of mine, it was simply used as a mind fuck. Either way it's certainly did the trick. The less freedom I had and the more control she took made me feel so submissive and so desperate to continue to please.

i stay stresssed out and depressed all the time anymore its hard for me to think its hard for me finding someone to be in my life when your family mistreats you your thinking pattern gets off of what you was going to do with screaming and yelling at me all the time it never fails i speak i get jumped on for breathing or moving 16 years of there mouths and mentally i really take much more it's killing me mental im already dead on the inside but idiots  doesn't care about me my feelings or my needs they dont care if i die anyways they tell me to kll myself nobody wants your stupid ass anyways fucking whore your nothing but a worthless piece of ass nobody wants ... and one cop in my hometown october said your ruthless piece of ass nobody wants when i was living at the apartment i was at so i stopped socializing i stop going to the store i busted my phone so i wouldn't have to deal with stupid ass bullies and i am at my breaking point and my landlord would let who ever in my aprtment because in august i was watching tv an smoked a joint before i went to bed an took my mucsle relaxer and then who ever had a key to my apartment did something because i was stiff an couldn't move and woke up next morning couldn't hardly move my right arm the second night they molsted me in my sleep and i can't walk for a week... they grab my right foot that is how i knew an i checked my self and i got pissed off them letting people in my apartment landlord was a jealous jesus christ freak that almost got me raped... i have no trust left with anybody at this point because when i do they abuse me 

why do people tell you to be strong when in reality there is nothing to stay strong for? Why do they think its ok to tell someone that you'll get through this that the pain will fade? They have no idea what your feeling what's in your head. I dont wish this kinda pain on anyone  losing a loved one sucks balls Losing a child is a pain that wont go away Losing your soul mate when they die you die to half your heart and soul go with them.  Everyone's grief is different from others some move quickly some try and some can't so people need to stfu about being strong an moving on June 16th will mark 2 months without the love of my life I knew He would go before me cause He was older but we were supposed to have a life time together instead it got cut short Cancer sucks!   

I don’t know how to exist inside my own skin right now. My body hurts constantly—every joint, every nerve buzzing or burning in some private hell—and yet my emotions are stuck in this flat, gray fog. It feels like I’m floating a few feet outside of myself, detached, watching someone else limp through my days. I’m supposed to care about things, supposed to feel urgency, supposed to feel desire, but mostly I just feel… blank. A haze. The hardest part is intimacy. Sex has always been a cornerstone of my identity, something that made me feel alive, connected, real. Now I lie beside people I love, people I want to want, and it’s like my body is a locked door. My brain remembers what it’s like to crave, but the signal doesn’t make it through. Instead I get this sense of obligation—this is who you are, this is what they expect, this is what you should be doing—while my body and spirit just won’t answer. I go through motions, or avoid them, and either way I feel like a fraud. It’s disorienting: physical pain screaming from one side, emotional numbness pressing from the other. I’m caught in between, unable to move fully toward either. I don’t know how to bridge that gap, how to show up in love when I’m not even present in myself. Some nights I wonder if this is permanent. If I’ll always be half-alive like this, longing for connection in theory but unable to touch it in practice. I miss desire like an old friend I can’t remember the face of. For now, all I can do is write it here, admit it to myself. Maybe that’s a start.

Experienced as a dominant but have not had a full time submissive in my life for a long time. The desires to find a slave wife that enjoys dollification and rough play have become stronger over the last few years. A submissive that I can build a life with and that will connect with me in many different ways and in all the aspects of my life. Desire a full time situation within a 24/7 connection and desire. Very interested in age gaps, interracial relationships, small women, and deep levels of submission/devotion. Some vanilla interests:Ren FairsMedieval Combat Groups (SCA, Dagorhir, and similar)Role-playing GamesGaming Conventions (GenCon, Origins, and Gamehole Con)AnimeCosplayScience FictionPhilosophyPsychology (I have a bachelors in Psych) Live a fairly average life outside of my Kink areas. Desire a fulltime situation where kink and dominance is an inherent part of our day to day lives. Would enjoy a submissive that wants to be the stay at home domestic in a 1950s style relationship. As well as being a sweet little one that I can spoil and take care of in many different ways. Open as well to different dynamics depending on what fits our needs. Feel that play is for good times and obedient slave girls. Punishment is not being allowed to play. There is more information on my profile and please feel free to contact me if you are interested in seeing if we match.

DOMINANT WOMEN BEWARE! Well, Mr. Beenhere25yearsandf*ckingwithdominantwomen contacted Me again.  I have a feeling he has made a full time job of this shinnanigans.  Contacts women or waits to be contacted, then has a 3 month relation, then disappears due to multiple guardians (LOL), dual citizenship (USA/UK), testing on his ALIEN DNA (LOL), OH LORD the list and LIES gooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooe ON AND ON!  Then someone else contacts you, given your name from Mr. Mindf*ck, and you quickly realize it is the same person!  Back and forth, round and round, LIES AND MORE LIES.  Emails from yahoo, aol, gmail (his favorite) and forget about it now that AI and ChatGPT have arrived.  He is a vertible keyboard warrior.  Dont be fooled if given a phone number.  You'll work for it, oh yes indeed and it will again be a series of shoots and ladders!  He is a L I A R, F R A U D and he even has ropped in a person or two for his mind games.  Can you imagine somone playing at this over 25 years?! If I have said it once, I've said it 100 times - verify verify verify and don't put one ounce of effort into another submissive man until HE PROVES HIMSELF TO YOU!  Phone, in-person VERIFICATION.  And this goes for the other wankers as well.  Even the ones who send a copy of license and passport.  Only in person, face to face, contracts signed and skin in the game proves a mans worth.

These writings are my thoughts. They're neither right or wrong simply what I think and feel. Everyone is entitled to their own opinions; Submission evolves just like everything else. However, we fundamentally stay the same. We have that deep need, want, desire to serve.  I believe a Dominant will build a submissives confidence. He will build her up and show her how strong she is because He is confident in His Own Dominance.  Anyone can Own a doormat. Not everyone is capable of Owning a strong minded, confident woman.  Ultimately the submissive doesn't have to bow down to every Tom, Dick or Harry just because they call themselves a Dom. You do not have to address them as sir or master or any other title. Submission should be earned through Mutual Respect, Trust and Honesty.  Like any relationship it takes time to get to know each other. The deeper the bond the deeper the submission. I do think as a submissive we should try to conduct ourselves respectfull. When lucky enough to be Owned we need to be mindful that we are a reflection on our Owners.  Before a submissive is Owned they hold their power in their hands. They owe it to themselves to be strong and ask questions. Remember when you submit you are putting your life in that persons hands. Do you both want the same things?  Yes of course you want to be led out of your comfort zone but, you want to be as safe as possible.  Always remember to have a safety call set up when you meet someone for the very first time. Listen to your gut. If something feels off then trust that feeling. Don't feel pressured into accepting things that don't sit right with you.  Most of all enjoy this beautiful lifestyle and stay happy and safe 👌🏻

A few things that need said.   One ... I am currently 58.  Due to not using email this account was created with, unable to do updates... do to this was created with an email I can no longer access. Secondly, I am very real.  So don't come at Me saying you're serious .... then not be.  I am not here to waste your time or Mine. Thirdly, My divorce is final.  If you need to know more just ask. Fourthly, I am healing.  And won't let the circumstances hinder Me no longer if I can help it.   Fifthly, I am working to move back to the USA by the end of 2025 at the latest. Sooner if possible. Lastly, as life goes, curves are thrown at Us.  So at 58, a new chapter is beginning.  Nuff said  

In other news, I am time-sharing a local, submissive, polyamorous, older boytoy with a few other women. He is busy, but if I work at it I can get a little time in with him each moth and we text almost daily. I like him. We get along well. We have compatible dietary situations so we can dine together without it being an issue. We saw Pillion together. He's got wonderful hands and I crave his massages. My queening chair is his new favorite toy, and we officially christened it on our ... second date, I think? He wears a chastity device during our dates by my request, but since he is free-range I do not keep him locked. I might unlock him if he can arouse me to orgasm, and our next date is going to be a more instructional R&D session about how to get me there, if I can keep him from distracting me while practicing: being the instructor and the practice model is a challenge, but can be so worth it.We have been to each others homes, seen each other starkers, and have even given each other tips on how to drive each other to distraction, so ... I am hoping that this could be a long-term situation. I have also met one of his other partners and his daughter.  So, that is my status update. I hope that you all have been well!

i really feel badly over what transpired this past week. i have enjoyed many rewarding experiences in r/l and sometimes talking via this site can open up minds and really get minds thinking towards a r/l meeting. there have been some special people i have met and they are exactly what i expected. i think i need to step back from this site. it hasn't happen in sometime, but i think someone has ghosted me, i guess they were not up to coffee or a meal. i do not play on my first meet. that is just dangerous.  so my mind closes again until someone is clever enough to open it. this world is not bs to me, but maybe vanilla is the answer....

    Shopping for harnesses makes me want to design a more woman friendly design    

Hmm let's see it is now 2022, so a lot have time has passed between my last real post. So many things have gone on in my life since then. In 2019 I took part in the World Transplant Games in the UK. That was a hell of a trip. Spent a few days in London, then went north to Yorkshire, to the land of James Herriot, Castle Howard, and my friends farm. I spent 5 days helping take care of their herd of pigs. Can't wait to go back. I return to London for my last 9 days and ate great food, saw amazing things, and got to see New Japan Pro Wrestling do their first show in England. Got home just before second year started. my next games are next year in Perth Australia. I will be cycling I will have a 5k time trial, a 20km team time trial, and another 30k time trial. Boy my legs are going to hate me. I had a pair of custom painted shoes done just for the games. I am hoping to be able to get a racing suit and a helmet wrapped in the same pattern.  i am hoping to spend a bit of time in Tokyo on my way to Australia. Maybe spend 5 days. 

Seeking a final addition to my home, my pack, my fife. I want someone who identifies as submissive or slave. Someone who would enjoy being part of my kink friendly Famale Domme led pack of hubby and boy, enjoying life with us in our beautiful Florida home. I have a room waiting for you, set up to work from home as I do, and 4 friendly dogs who make life better. I still have my kink room and equipment and crave obedience and someone to use for my sadistic whims. There are not many skills in the kink world I am not skilled in, but there are a few I do not prefer to practice. If you are bi sexual that is great, boy is interested, if you are not that is fine too as I am more than enough Lady for everyone.  I now have a brief chat and meet because waiting has not been productive, a lot of chating then ghosting when it is time to meet. I am real, I live the lifestyle 24/7 but of course I have my vanilla/professional side. I have lots of photos and am not afraid to give you my phone number soon. I do not chat on any of the platforms most seem to ask about.  Reach out, your life can change this year. 

Secret Room "Of her naked body this: that he had never seen anything so beautiful." -Lindsay Hall, Sea of Hooks (My mission is to get you all to read this book)  

As promised, here is a copy of your BDSMTest result with ID uZkZThzx100% Degradee100% Rope bunny100% Submissive99% Voyeur93% Exhibitionist92% Pet92% Slave85% Masochist80% Experimentalist70% Primal (Prey)59% Non-monogamist30% Vanilla9% Brat4% Primal (Hunter)0% Daddy/Mommy0% Rigger0% Ageplayer0% Brat tamer0% Degrader0% Dominant0% Little0% Master/Mistress0% Owner0% Sadist0% SwitchYou can also view it online at https://bdsmtest.org/r/uZkZThzx?lang=EN

Mounting a STR8 male Pilars of society, husbands, fathers, movers and shakers. in all body types and backgrounds. You've got to love them all; at least I do. I'm partial to the bravado, the in your face attitude that screams "I'm terrified of venturing outside of my gender, but with the right MAN I'm game." The one thing to remember is to be subtle, these boys are a scary bunch and the slightest threat to their perceived orientation will make them clam up (pun intended) tight and you will loose your boy. However, once you're in their trust that is your chance to explore and they will provide the info you need. Family, marriage, parental relationships  and home issues. Overwhelmed, over worked, and under sexed; perfect combination and there is you, a strong paternal figure to hug them and tell them you understand  and suffer with his plight.  There is a moment of vulnerability in which you become his whole world as he contemplates all crumbling you are the sturdy support.  Sometimes it takes time to get there. Of course this does not apply to your male bride, the one you want for you only.  Check my journal on male brides.  Eventually it will graduate to touching, hugging, kissing and then cock play.  Once you become the adult in his eyes he will nurse from your rod and do it often because is “us boys.” But once he kneels to suck you his body is yours to explore and his butt is there as he is busy following your instructions on how to please you. Easy does it, touch, probe by do not put you finger in yet. Let him get use to your touch and caress.  Eventually his ass will arch up and that is your cue  to begin your entry. Ever so slowly and tenderly. Let  his  body guide you and then move your body to a position of dominance, standing and him in all fours. Pick him up, embrace him and assure him your understanding and his need for release.  Play with his cock , remember he is str8 and feels entitled. Yet as you play in front prepare the rear by probing his prostate. He’ll go through the roof realizing he never felt this with his wife, there is pleasure in his ass and you, his pal, just opened a new window for him to look out of. He is now yours and he will come back, promise. 

Attitude matters! I will be clear here. If I choose you and you are not fit, healthy and eat healthy per My desires.  I will put you on a strict diet and exercise program.  I don't care what you weighed in high school or your younger years.  That is not what you look like today.  Who you are today,  what you look like today is all I will see, and matters to Me! Strip naked,  take a long look in the mirror from every angle,  take photos of yourself.  Are you proud of your appearance? Or do you need to put in the work? I am on a journey to better fitness and appearance.  If you are not, or have no ambition to, we will not match up. you don't have to be perfect right now, although that is desirable.   What you do need is to be putting in the work and working on the goal of better health,  healthy eating/diet, and becoming physically fit.  Eliminating substances from your consumption that is not healthy.  Watch 'Biggest Looser', maybe it will inspire you. Its free to watch on freevee app  

When I say I want local people to serve, I mean it. If you write to Me and don't meet My requirements, I do not OWE you a response. My profile clearly states what I want, and ANYTHING other than that goes in the trash can. I get stood up, and I do not expect a WHY. I get ghosted, and rather than be some stalker, I never write them again. It is easy to move on if YOU want to move on!  

On collarspace today someone messaged me then blocked me so I couldn't reply. I deleted the email and now I wish I hadn't. Basically the person was bitching because of my stated standards on my profile. Three sentences, grammar and punctuation or I will block and delete the email. The person thought they'd be making this fabulous point by pointing out that collarspace has the wierd filter that zaps punctuation and replaces some words. Except I already know about that and it isn't something I block for. I was accused of assuming things that I don't assume, but the person, rather than asking, didn't find out the truth of the matter and rather assumed about me instead. There was more to the email, but it is always irritating when someone makes their own assumptions then accuses me of making assumptions about others. I could update my profile to explain that I know about the filter issues, but anyone coherent and eloquent enough to know about and ask about it has already earned their way into my good graces. And anyone who assumes THOSE are the punctuation and grammar issues that I'm talking about isn't someone I'm interested in anyway. I'm not worried about perfect punctuation, spelling, or grammar. As my profile says, "All initial emails with less than three sentences, or missing capitalization and punctuation, are deleted and the sender blocked." Maybe I can make that clearer, and maybe I will, but the person who thought they were calling me out but didn't have the courage to see what I might reply got under my skin. That kind of cowardice masquerading as bravado is just bullshit. ~Me

I will take this pain into myself Wrap it in ribbons, and give you my self.  Wiping away my own tears,  Facing my own fears Everything you ever wanted The moment I became your biggest regret.  Oh, he doesn't speak anymore, My heart can't take it. You can't move on,  When the mind is wound around him. These wounds they bleed for you, But he's not around anymore to see. So I lick them slowly, Who are you to hurt me? Poison on my lips, These sweet words just slip out, The scorch marks on my tongue Tell you what I'm about. I tried to bleed for you, Tried to shed this skin for you, I'm just asking for some kinda sign, For the stars to align, Or for you to vacate my mind.   I'm not good enough for you, it's true, But goddamn it I'm in love with you. 

So many letters asking about the intro quote in my profile. Nope, it's not from a book. I wrote it. For all those who are asking, here's the full version:::   That sweet girl, with the world in her soul, the heart of it on her sleeve, tears like diamonds never shed for the pain of the world felt too sweetly. She holds it all, your dreams, your desires, and the ability to take your darkest fantasies and make them whole. She is strength of spirit, and her soul flies free above you. You can take her to arm, like a falcon coming to roost, but you will never tether this feather of sunlight. Yet, fragile is this creature. As if to say, all your words were glass in delicate hands. One false word, and the glass shatters, shards of bloody pain amidst her fragile fingers. Oh, speak you the truth, that her gentle hands stay soft and her eyes glow for you. Speak you the truth, that the world, your world, not shatter and leave her with glow extinguished. Rather let her fly, admiring the curve of her as she soars, knowing that it is to you she returns, that sweet girl, to let you glimpse the heart of it all deep within falcon green eyes."  by yourgirljoy 2022

PSA!!!  Do NOT expect instant responses when you reach out to me. In the event that I do respond right away, consider yourself lucky! I receive several pages of messages daily. It takes me some time to sift through all my messages to find yours. Please keep in mind that - I also sleep, eat, shower and have a life of my own. If you feel that you need instant replies or you're easily offended - just don't bother reaching out and save us both the trouble!! Be realistic and don't expect instant gratification.  I do not owe you a damn thing - not even my time - but I enjoy this lifestyle and the meaningful conversations that I do engage in.  I have gone through several messages of immature boys who are butthurt that I didn't reply INSTANTLY and decided to block me. #1 that's your loss #2 that's childish #3 its a waste of MY time and energy that could be spent on REAL submissives and individuals who are waiting for my response  #4 it's just fucking RUDE Just be patient and thank you in advance!

Saw something on here today that was a HUGE RED FLAG for me. Some guy checked me out, so I in turn checked him out, and saw that he was using a picture of a former sub or playmate or whatever on his profile, face and all.  I gotta ask, does she know that you are using her picture, showing her ladybits and her face on a bdsm site for all to see?  How many women are having their privacy violated because a guy thinks the best way to advertise himself on here or other sites is to show pics of women, identifying chracteristics and all?  Frst of all, is that all you got?  You can't make your own profile attractive on your own?  You have to resort to pcitures of other people? Second of all, how do I know that if I played with a guy who does this to other women, that he wouldn't do it to me also?  I am not the only one that thinks this way.  Check out the questions about this on discussion boards on Fet.  Lots of women say/think the same thing. HUGE red flag.  HUGE.  

Self-Education I’ve been on websites like this one for quite a few years but was only sporadically active. I was looking for information about things as well as for other people to talk with about it. But I was only sporadically active. Two or three times, I thought I had it figured out. I thought I knew what it was that caught my interest that led to my fetishes. Then I realized that some of those fetishes were more than fetishes. So I explored more. And the more I explored, the more I discovered that I liked or at least found intriguing. But I began to see a common thread between the fetishes, they all fit together. And they fit so well, I made a crossword grid out of them. lol I would put up pictures and take them down. I would make my profile out to be a personal ads and then change the wording later. A little frustrated that I didn’t know what to do with all of this knowledge and information I had been seeking and had now found, I threw my hands up in the air. What good was all of it if I didn’t know what to do with it? If I couldn’t answer the questions of what I liked and why? But I was never going to find the answers. And the reason why is because I was looking for them. I was behaving like an addict. And that needed to stop. There wasn’t anything wrong with liking and even liking something a lot. But if it was the greatest thoughts in my head, then it needed to be the most important thing in my life. It wasn’t until I stopped thinking about what I liked and what I wanted that it all began to fall into place. I began to read what others liked and wanted and what they posted. I would focus in on the postings of dominant women as they were ones I saw myself as a counterpart to. I’m one of millions who read the postings of dominant women. The first time I read these postings, I tried to imagine how I could fit into what they were saying. But I wasn’t finding that pathway in their words. At that moment, it really started to define itself. And things I guess I already knew were becoming clear. I’m not gonna be right for everyone. Lots of dominant women will not be right for me. I do know what I want and I do know what I like. And I’ll gladly share those things with someone in private messaging. (Although I fully understand that you can discover a lot of my kinks and interests and ideals and all on this profile. But that would require you to look at my profile, top to bottom. And a lot of people don’t do that on here. That’s something else I’ve learned.) The basis of everything I needed I already had when I made a profile on this site years ago. It was just a matter of continuing to learn. Being submissive, or believing myself submissive, was something I knew. But its definition I didn’t understand. And before I could be educated by anyone, I needed to do most of that education myself. My focus needs to be on her. It’s my rightful place. And it’s all about what feels natural because what feels natural is what IS natural. I’m not below her. She’s not above me. But the truth is SHE DOESN’T NEED ME. I need to show her why she would need me. And because she doesn’t need me, if she keeps me in her life, that is a privilege. I want to be useful to her. I want her to see me as being useful. This comes from actions. Actions first. Words second. Strong and confident woman deserves respect. My goal is always to make her happy and to keep her happy. To put her happiness on a pedestal. This doesn’t require her to be dominant and me to be submissive. It should be natural and feel that way. Make her life easier. Take her stresses away. Take her energy-draining responsibilities away from her. She wants to feel safe with you. If she doesn’t feel safe, why would she need you? Make her life ... better. This is where I’m at in the journey for knowledge. This is the point I have reached with my self-education. Many more lessons to learn yet.  

Miss May's Confessional is now open...   "Do not forgive me Miss May, for I've been a bad boy and I plan to do it again..."   This is a call to all my pervy pals to come forward and entertain me with whatever naughty diversions you've been having, real or imagined. Brag about your recent sexual escapades or confess your impure thoughts (especially regarding me <3 ).  If you're lucky I might be into it too and want to join in on your fun... Seriously, I'm as depraved as you are and your fantasies delight me! And don't worry, my sweets, your kinky confessions are confidential.   On a related note, some of you are mistaken about what the free version of femdom offers. You're here for my entertainment, not the other way around, and you'll get from me what you put in. Be interesting, be open, be willing to figure out how to stroke my ego, and then I'll play with you. I'm not going to coax it out of you either, and expect to have your persistence tested. Don't be too proud to double message me if you think your last message got overlooked. I do make an effort to respond but life does happen.    And finally, thank you to you lovely gentlemen who admire me, check in on me, and wish me well. Your compliments and attention are much appreciated <3   -MM 

First Journal Entry I am back on here after a long hiatus on this platform, fingers crossed, it works out better than the first time.  I am here looking to make friends, and who knows what after that. One thing I have found so far is that not much has changed, those jumping into my inbox still manifest many of the prior encountered issues: trying to insta me, using titles before they have been earned, fantasy pushing, and having the sort of energy and vibe of trying to use me as a kink vending machine. I am a person first, before being a dominant, so please don't do this.  A new one on me is seeing not being willing to jump to chat apps as a red flag, as a reason to think someone isn't genuine. To be very clear, I won't jump off this platform onto a chat app after a few brief message exchanges. Trust has to be built up, a connection of sorts created first. I am not interested in one of hook-ups, but want to build something more meaningful, and that will happen on here first. In my book trying to pull me off here, after a few minimal messages, definitely is one, and strongly suggests a scammer at work, not a genuine person.  Please don't try and do that. 

i don't play a lot of video games. In fact, I don't have a gaming system made in the last decade. But once or twice a year when I visit my nephews, I play this game that makes me really happy. So much so that I looked into buying a system just to play it. But a few hundred dollars doesn't seem like a solid investment for one game when there's so much else I need it for.   A few months ago my nephew got an entire system upgrade. My dad bought it. The entire thing. With every last accessory. So I thought, maybe he might do that for me, too, if I asked. My nephew told me everything I needed and I set up a wishlist for my birthday. My dad came to visit and he brought presents. All the accessories, yay! But no gaming system to use them with. Disappointing. But Christmas isn't all that far off. A few weeks ago I was talking to my sibling and mentioned the whole birthday thing with the accessories. He said ask him for Christmas. I was really hesitant. If he didn't do it for my birthday I didn't have high hopes for Christmas. But if I don't ask I'll never know. It's still on the wishlist, I sent a text asking Santa to please get it. No response.  Its not about the gaming system. I would never have asked for it, I know it's expensive. It's about worth. Am I worth enough to spend the money to buy it? The nephew is. Am I? He has the money. You probably already know how this ends.  No. He didn't get it for me. I'm not worth it to my father. I am only worth the accessories.  I guess eventually I'll have to buy it since I have everything else and try not to think about the little value I hold for the man I try so hard to please. This is why I try not to ask him for anything. I don't know why I was hopeful. I know better. 

As I'm sitting here thoroughly enjoying Metallica Monday on WMMR, it occurs to me to mention something else about my thought process. (See, I told you it was all about me ) In the past, it was common to see "If you favorite me without messaging me first, I will block you" on profiles.  Unfortunately, I'm not particularly quick off the cuff. I turn things over in my mind and rewrite several times before my fingers ever touch a keyboard. One of my solutions to that is to favorite a profile, then let my introduction simmer for a few days so that I can stand out from the inevitable avalanche. At least, standing out as more than another "On Ur KnEeS, bIcH" type is the idea. So that's that. By the way, wasn't The Inevitable Avalanche an obscure X-Men character from the 90's?

Another day another experience. the rollercoaster of life as a cd/sissy has we looking and trying pain. one day this week it was ordered (another online relationship started up) to place nipple clamps on and they were left on all day for what like 6 hours. nipples are even nore sore now days later and each hour i have to pull them hard out to keep them sore. i love it!! Then yesterday was ordered to tie my cock and balls up with 2 shoestrings., Having never done that before well not for ages anyway, was rather new. But my once done and they were all secured. one under the gland, the other around balls. well the feeling was intense to say the least.  then all covered with a satin red thong panties, was so sexy. working from home was never so much fun!! that was left on for again 6 hours. once off there were marks all over them yet so intense a feeling. never felt like that before. was so intense a feeling inward more than needy. what next it wonders and hope. should it become a pain slut to someone?!

Presently screening and vetting 43 prospective owners from US, UK, Australia.Two are former military.They are the first two it has gone to voice communication. Most presently.Building up trust is a very important before even a physical meeting to see if they truly know how to have a real slave.Its cautious after being in this Lifestyle for 37 years.And being a former Collarspace mentor and Collarspace admin.Dealt with far too many craziness and right nutters.

One of the advantages of being older is that you learn what is realistic for a lifestyle and what isn't - what exists only in the realm of fantasy. The various profiles you read of "...wanting to be locked in a dungeon 24/7..." just aren't realistic.But… when you make someone whom (or what) they have always dreamed of being, it’s an emotional experience for both of you, almost intoxicating. So how can you make this work? In my arena of the lifestyle - transforming someone into a rubber or rubber doll 24/7 isn't realistic. You can however try and set up your lifestyle so that the experience feels like 24/7. The following works for a latex lifestyle: I would come home from work and go into a spare room and change into rubber. My slave would already be waiting for me in another room, hooded. The first time I saw her after work she would be hooded. The first time she saw me after I got home, I too would also be hooded.The next day, before I left for work, I would change into work clothes without her seeing me. That way, we went several days without seeing each others faces, only hooded. For two people who found being around other humans awkward, this truly was a moment of emotional freedom. I have tried this and it worked (wonderfully!), up to a point. But that topic - when things didn’t work out perfectly - is the subject for another post.

Hello again to all,   There is so much more complexity to life and interests.  In actuality, I am a natural born dominant personality and that is separate from and precedes bdsm.  My mother said I learned to talk before I learned to walk because I realized I could get everyone to do what I wanted.  Being dominant is as natural as breathing and has nothing to do with sex specifically, it informs all parts of my life and being. First assumption people have is that being a Dominant is part of doing bdsm.  I am not looking nor seeking anyone or anything.   My life is doing and experiencing and achieving.    I would rather focus on art and business and watch shows and smoke bud and chill with my pits than deal with someone else's bucket list and wishes that I will fulfull it for them.  Waste of my time when that is absolutely not sex for me.  Just me doing something well for someone else because they need it and I am exceptional at most things I choose to do doesn't really make it interesting or exceptional for me.  Just run of the mill.   My sex type is a younger ab'd up sexy twink in their 30's to 40's.   Please note I am not looking for that either.   I am doing me and working on my income and business.  Here to talk to and meet interesting intelligent people and honestly, practice blogging somewhere while I get my website up.  Have the domain and the hosting set.....  for a few businesses actually.   If you want to be used and are concerned with sex primarily, find someone else.  If you want a fun and interesting life and to do more in it... maybe I will find you interesting.      I was sexually explorative and a NYC club kid (excellent dancer) in the 80's which was a shit ton of fun. Being in charge and very considerate can all be part of a dominant personality and are integral to all ects of my life. Silly men who contact me asking about what fetishes I enjoy miss the point, fetish doesn't drive my life.   I do.  If you are telling me you want and it is only about your sexual bdsm needs in your first contact, you will get one email and then I will ignore you if you continue only talking about bdsm and sex. While I do love many things bdsm, I do not love talking about them unless I already know someone.   If I am going to share details like that, I will do so when my website is done and I am blogging and podcasting and using those stories and details for business for all to hear/read rather than tell them to a casual questioner. I have stories enough from many ects of life to tell and let others live vicariously throughthem while I get some residual income.My being here on collarspace is to practice blog and, every once in a while, I make a good friend which I value more.   Most of my actual relationships happened in every day life.    If you really want to know your chances with me, below is the criteria that matters: I am more attracted to someone in shape, 15 years younger, with a brain, abs, and an interest in something that intersects with my businesses  which use skills/crafts like painting, graphic design, wearable art, clothing/t shirt design, website design, leather work, beadwork, blogging, and podcasting, computer tecg hardware and software support.  There must also be a connection with personal interests which include a lot Marvel, DC, and sci fi/fantasy shows while working in photoshopand going out dancing and fine dining, when I don't cook at home (excellent home chef here), in-depth conversations,yes I read global news and poltiics and science every other fucking intersting thing I run into and research.   I learn a lot, talk fast, think faster and most people are overwhelmed.    I do all of these things and more and I want someone who can get involved, keep up, and be rewarded with fun things that include yes, bdsm and just plain old hardcore fuck for an hour and get damn sweaty type shit at least once a day...which is actually my favorite thing.    No huge dicks wanted jsut ones that can go for an hour or more...lmmfao.    Older, petite and that shit don't fit, and not what I want.Lola the Iron Mistress        

I have, in the past 6 months, been messaged by 2 different men who had something about raceplay in either their messages or in their profiles.  Allow me to be perfectly clear: any racial slur, race play, homophobic slur, misogyny, or domination from any aspect of supposed genetic superiority is a limit.  I grew up having various slurs directed towards myself, family, and friends and they are a quick way to have me block you. I mean the following in an honest and non judgemental way: if you have those desires, I would encourage you to look into your personal history and see why you have those desires or urges and honestly discuss them with a licensed professional.  It is often a product of internalized hatred towards yourself or others through no fault of your own.  Talking with a professional will help you to a much happier place where you can feel more comfortable with yourself and others. BUT, do not send me messages with any form of racial, transphobic, homophobic, or misogynistic slur in them.  It will lead to me immediately blocking you and reporting the message.  Having anything about race in your profile (other than your own) will result in a short message and me blocking you.  You are only harming yourself and it's a hard limit for me.  Consider this your one and only warning.

As a Master I envision my role as more than just a mere figure in their lives, but rather as a sentinel, a guardian who stands at the forefront of their futures. It's an inherent part of my responsibilities and duties to shield them from harm, while also steering them in the right direction. In this world filled with endless possibilities, paths and unforeseen challenges, I perceive myself as the beacon of light that navigates them through their journeys.  Moreover, it is my explicit role to ensure they become the most refined versions of themselves. I do not wish for them to merely become part of the crowd, but to fully embrace their uniqueness and potential, and ultimately realize the zenith of their capabilities. The world we live in is diverse and enriched with various talents, abilities, and strengths. Therefore, I bear the responsibility of kindling the spark within them, helping them unearth their hidden talents, fostering their skills, and aiding them in scaling new heights of achievement.  It's crucial to understand that it is not about trying to mold them into something they are not, but rather assisting them in tapping into the reservoir of potential that lies within, to become the best versions of themselves. This entails encouraging them to consistently strive for excellence, motivating them to surpass their limitations, and helping them cultivate an indomitable spirit that cherishes the pursuit of learning, growing, and evolving.    

Ever flown a FemDom across the country for a first date? I'm a huge Frank Turner fan.  He's currently doing a 50 states in 50 days U.S. tour.  Thus far, I've made it to 4 of them - MD, PA, NY and NJ.  My east coast boytoy can't make it to the west coast shows, so I'm in need of a new one.  If interested, I'm looking at Seattle on 7/22, Phoenix on 7/28, L.A. on 7/30 and/or Honolulu HI on 8/1.  Making it to the L.A. show and then to Hawaii would be epic!  Message Me with a clothed, tasteful photo if interested... UPDATE: Made it to the show in LA--so much fun!! 

This past week was superb!   Had a few friends over for a turkey dinner I made.  Brined the 15 lb turkey in a sugar and salt brine, then AIR fried it.  The bird was done in 3 hours and ready to mate up with the other sides I made.   I enjoy my time in the kitchen as it relaxes me.  My friends continually rave about my cullenary skills.  Part of the fun of entertaining during the holidays is being free about who you are, what you enjoy and being able to share it with your friends.   Yes, the ladies are collared by their owners, including my friend Veronica, who brings her lovely slave girl Jessica.  Set the table for 9, myself and my four couples.  Turkey, dressing, green beans, hot rolls, mashed potatoes and gravy, and of course a white wine.  I was asked when I would find a woman to wear my collar again.  Said that was up to the good Lord himself, and maybe a bit of luck and reckoning. Been single again now for 3 years, and have not been actively looking too much.   When / if it happens again, I am hopeful her training will not be too stressful for her.  Holidays are so much fun, even with the games we play.  Sometimes the single life does suck, but I am not hurry to cross over and explore the alternative quite yet, Lord be willing!   Thats all for now youall, I will try to post again after the holidays..  

Helpful hints: I am poly. This means I may have other subs or lovers. Or none. According to my desires.You don't have to be poly but I will not change who I am to be with anyone. I enjoy men and women and the full spectrum in between. My interests aren't about what's between your legs so much as what is in your mind, heart and soul. I do enjoy naughty bits but I prefer to get to know you first. See if we are a good match. I host local kink events. I have a busy and fulfilling life. In order to get my attentions you will have to be interesting and should put your best foot forward. I enjoy intelligent people, no matter if they are verbose or quiet. If you're too verbose, I do have a ball gag. :) I live in Alaska. Yes it's cold here. Yes it's dark here. Yes I see the aurora's outside my house. Yes it's full of wildlife and quite amazing. Yes it's a bucket list destination. I'm happy to talk about it but if that's all you want to know then watch the discovery channel. Good luck.  

 I am pleased  to be very strict highly Disciplinary controlling to a fault and an everyday spanker   all for a girl like you If you are true servant a service oriented woman  who does her best please and thrives in a strict  and demanding environment so my goal here is in  your Ownership   based on TPE protocols all taught to you within a relationship of apparent  domesticity  and normalcy but strict rules  you will abide by within rules governing  as many parts  of your life  as I wish to take  into my hands  and put under my authority     you will have domestic duties and household protocols such as  dress rules your clothing choices  will no longer  be yours to decide..  your demonstrable humility as you serve..  no huffing  no puffing  no eye rolls…    everything you  are given to do  will be carried out  with your  Respectful Obedience  as its base  and as its framework    you will be helpful  useful and a  very well Disciplined woman  my use of you  will make you  worth the time  it takes to  keep you  and train you   and pls understand  there will always  be the strap  for you to deal with if you don’t do things as you are  expected to thank you for reading    and if your profile  describes a very  nice girl needing  a new home… a good home…  and much further education? do say hello..  BMcB ---------------------------------     so I am revising my  profile here as I reconsider  my needs of the moment  the bedrock for me  is the slave I wish to Own  for the long term  to possess  to guide  and control  down to her smallest details  the one I am after is  obviously service oriented  maybe even genetically so  a born servant?  very likely as there are  born slaves in my experience  she is a girl needing to be found and collared  then trained  and put to work  learning the lessons of her submission  and her best slavery  and put to work in domestic ways  made to earn her keep  tending to chores..duties..  and my whims…  …daily work requirements  with strict oversight of  not only what she does  but how she does it  she will have tasks  to complete even  if it is decided to  allow her to work  outside her home  and she will complete them  and satisfactorily  before she is permitted  to sleep she will be a pleasant girl  in all she does  and certainly in carrying out  all her domestic things  no huffing no puffing no eye rolling  she will be monitored  and overseen  in her free time  as well  and in another epoch  she would be understood  to be a scullery maid  recently come down from  derry or belfast I believe where she would be  not so much  banished to the basement  as simply located there  where she would cook clean  and make tidy  the lives of those she  was Owned by… and again all my slaves work will be carried out  under strict oversight  and a good hard caning  of her bare ass  for any disappointments  she will be permitted  very slight unsupervised time  in addition she will receive  training in basic Obedience  with Disciplinary inspirations attached  to ready her for confinement and service  in her eventual TPE lifestyle  her submission will be intensely  exploited and can enjoyed at anytime  she is available for the pleasure  and gratification of her instructor  mentor employer Master care taker Owner pick one!  and any others she  might be given to  for whatever pleasures  they might decide  to use her for  her cooperation in doing  whatever she’s been told to do  is fundamental to her  successful Ownership  and her training and use are envisaged as providing  much pleasure for all involved  except for the slave herself  and before I forget  her slave pussy is going to be  closed for business  and will remain so for her foreseeable future  however she will be ‘teased’ daily  and very intensely with her orgasms properly denied ...this is btw only the initial training  of a slave in service…  -------------------------- MstrB writing from nyc I am here to find an appropriate slave and to Own that slave I will only consider full Ownership and complete authority over the girl I will decide most if not all of the slaves affairs her life her training her education and her uses these are mine to decide and I will use them I prefer to be strict with a slave and I am close to being a lifelong Disciplinarian who enjoys judging correcting Disciplining I am well aware that servants need attention sometimes words suffice but more often the strap needs to be brought into the conversation the slave will be taught to concern herself with being helpful useful and pleasing and above all Obedient she is going to be a very useful girl for me and never ever make my wonder why I took her into my life to begin with MasterB  

1 year post gastric bypass I have lost approximately 80 pounds from December 2020-May 2022. I had gastric bypass on May 2021. What have I learned in the first year post gastric bypass: A bite or two of something is enough for a taste but you don’t need a ton. A single bite or two of something sweet but high in calories is usually enough. I was trained as a small child that anything you take you eat. Learning to stop when full and ask for a box or throw away/give away the remainder has been a huge success. Shopping in decreasing sizes doesn’t mean you have to purchase every size as you go down. I have gone from a 22/24 sometimes 26 down to a 12-16 depending on the store. I have gotten a lot of my clothes from friends at a clothing exchange. I have at times lost more inches than pounds so when i decide everything is too big I shop then i see a large jump from where i was to where I am. I’ve gone from an old navy xxl at my heaviest to a xl in bodycon dresses to a m in summer dresses. Which was a thrill. However, I don’t shop enough to purchase every size. In Jeans, I usually end up dropping 2 or 3 sizes when i shop since i wear them with a belt until they are insanely big. Weighing/measuring portions isn’t a bad thing. I actually want to upgrade my food scale to a nicer one. I use this daily. When I pack lunches for work I’m still packing too much. It is a shock to bring home half of what i pack. If i take a large back of something into my desk drawer I have to take a measuring device to portion it out or portion ahead of time. If not I fall into bad habits The scale isnt the only victory. If i lose inches and clothing fit better that is a win. Being able to take dresses from tunic tops to actually dresses with boots this winter has been fun. Regular knee-high boots not extra extended calf have been a thrill. Being able to handle heels regularly has been amazing. Going to the gym is fun with the right classes. Spend the extra for the gym with classes you might like. My family spends 86 per month on the YMCA instead of 40 for planet fitness locally. The Y has childcare and all the classes. I go to water aerobics, pure barre and body pump. I have a ton of fun at all 3. Plus as long as I go 12 times a month I get 20 back on membership. If my husband goes 12 times we get 20 back for him as well. SO it bring the Y down close to Planet fitness in cost plus it includes childcare and activities for my daughter as well. I can keep up with my co-workers who are almost half my age. I feel mentally sharper. I also can physically outdo some of them. I work in a department where we move some boxes of paperwork on a regular basis. As long as i’m not wearing a short skirt and the box isn’t over my head I can lift most. I have learned it is ok to ask for help with medical concerns. I am an insulin diabetic on a pump. I have had to reach out a few times for my data to be reviewed by my diabetic care team and be adjusted. My goals for year 2 are to: I plan to up my time at the Y. I currently go 2 times a week for me and then 2 times a week for my kid to use the pool. I want to get to 3 or 4 times a week for me and 2 times for my kid. Find someone to be accountable to forMonitoring the protein i get in daily- i should be getting between 60-90 grams of protein in dailyMy time spent at the gymMy food logs With my current partners consider adding those pieces into my dynamic with them. Not so much as to be babied by them but to know i’m being monitored. To Know i will be asked why i didnt do one of them some specific day. It is like the monitoring with my medications that we do currently. I want to get under 200 pounds. I have always been a BBW but i want to become closer to hwp. I want to be able to completely shop in straight sizes instead of still flipping between straight sizes and plus. I want to be able to get tied into more positions. In addition to being a masochist.

So, here's the deal: I'm 62, I have finally found comfort in my shell... I need a PERMENANT Mistress who is going to be BRUTAL with me, use me and abuse me, dehumnanize me, heavy CBT, bondage, caging/kenneling, toilet (full sometimes), outside bondage, predicament bondage, ashtray slave, spit slave, eating the dead skin scrapings from your lovely and delicious FEET, and yes, your small toenail clippings which I'll consume. I'm REAL, ladies and I need this. I love being in a cage/kennel. I'm not here to waste yours or my time. I'm here to be your slut/pig/whore/toilet/whatever you want. I DO NOT CARE. I get tribute so, yeah, not a problem but NOT before, please. I'm old school and will do that when I come for my 2+ hours therapy session. I take my servitude seriously and my slavery seriously. This is the life I've chosen. Women are POWERFUL and are to be OBEYED. Men don't get that. I do... Women are superior to men in every way. Women abuse/use me as they wish. This is the way. I believe it. I live it. I know it. I shave all the hair off my body save for my lower arms and head.  I wear pantyhose or stockings and panties (all the time).  I love the body I'm in and how I'm used/abused. I seek to have a mistress experiment on me, try new things and enjoy our time together. Please, I beg all Mistresses to consider this slut for her enjoyment. I will travel to you. Warmly and humbly, slave selene (my female name)

I was in Dallas so I contacted this bitch man I met on Collarspace. He was happy to come to my hotel, buy me dinner and a beer and go up to my room for a good facefucking. He was big, fat and out of shape, as I ate I asked him questions, and was timid and respectful and always good to call me Sir. I learned about his lack of sex life and what led him to want to suck cock so bad he would met a stranger and submit. He was smart and articulate but, as most unaware of why they want this. His nipples jutted through his shirt as we talked. I let him know his bitch tits would suffer soon. He was excited to know. As we went up to my room I made him stand with his nose in the corner of the elevator. It was going to be a fun night.    

  An insight for a slave downunder to understand the sadist side of me.   I found along the way somethings very interesting.   Pain   Pleasure   Intense pain   Intense pleasure.   An hour later, while marks remain, you can not remember how either felt so it must be performed again   And again   And again.     Endorphins   The little body chemicals that respond to pain over time, and not just mask it, but make it feel pleasurable.     For example, if you ever hit your shin very hard on something, it really really hurts... but if you pay attention, your body may well begin to feel better, 'good', 'happy'.    These are those endorphins taking hold just as they do during a serious orgasm.   It is setup with very strict escape proof bondage.  Whispers in the ear of the hopelessness she is in, the pain and abuse that is coming, she is softly petted before the sudden abuse envelopes her, and she will wiggle and moan and scream and plead but nothing will relent.  Nothing will hold back the pain she will feel   Nothing.   And she is reminded of this verbally, which often primes her mind for the direction will will take, and since she has no control, she is told to release it all without holding anything back.   The mind begins, anticipate and then demand such as it goes along, thus you have slave screaming 'harder' and 'more'  and dont stop.  Do not ever stop.   It is a semi-conscious state many call subspace but it is just the effect of endorphins.  The more the better as they say   Thus you have the state where the sadist feeds off the slaves love of and need for pain and she encounters pleasure in abundance that she is not allowed in any other way.   I have whipped women long and often and very hard to achieve the end result.  While they are passed out I watch them to make sure they are breathing ok and such.   When they come out of it, I teach them to parade in front of me after I release them.  Show off their marks, their colors, which ones hurt the most and inspired the deepest reaction.  Then to kneel and forehead on my right boot to thank me and then forehead on my left boot to beg to do it again.   And I hold them for a while and let them recover more whispering how the next one will feel and how long it will last.   Then they can go about their daily slave duties with purpose.   They will fell totally secure and safe in their purpose.   Its a very nice place to be.

Just Like This ..... Where'd you wanna go? How much you wanna risk? I'm not looking for somebody With some superhuman gifts Some superhero Some fairytale bliss Just something I can turn to Somebody I can kiss I want something just like this...

L.A: I need a Female Domme or Switch date to a FemDomme Dungeon Play Party in West Hollywood Sat. Nov. 6 https://fetlife.com/events/1045163   I want to attend the Sweet Sadist FemDomme BDSM play party in West Hollywood Sat. Nov 6.  The Dungeon is richly stocked with MANY BDSM play stations on the first floor.  On the second floor is a lounge room and another bedroom with 3 or 4 clean beds.   I live in Northridge, San Fernando Valley, L.A.  I will need you to pick me up in Northridge, take us to the BDSM Play Party in West Hollywood, and then take me back home to Northridge after the party is over at 1:00 am.   I am a Male Switch Rigger, but I will play as a male submissive on the main floor.  I floggings, spankings, body worship and foot worship (100% ANY female body part), strapon sex, bondage, cock & ball bondage, and roleplaying.  More of my fetishes are listed on my FetLife Profile, along with my BDSMTest.org test results.   Thank you, SuaveItalian  

  So I have had a few people now ask me what I am looking for and normally I don't like to put this in to words because it isn't something that is set in stone. It is definitely fluid and ever-changing, but I guess I can put the basics. Firstly, in order to define what I am looking for in a partner, I have to define who I am as my partner would be, in the most base sense, the opposite side of the same coin(s) (note the plural and you will start to see why this isn't so easy for me to define). So lifestyle me in a nutshell: -masochistic tendencies - primal - kajira - slave - submissive - doll - baby girl tendencies (not a little) - slight brat tendencies - service-oriented - energy practitioner Vanilla me in a nutshell: - high functioning anxiety/manic depression (sometimes not so high functioning) - extremely introverted - Norse Pagan - Gypsy Soul/ Wanderlust - dog mom - Scorpio (almost to a T, honestly minus the high sexual side) - highly intelligent and logical - overthinker - animal lover - hopeless romantic So in the most BASIC sense, that is me...so from there I would be looking for someone to complement me in these areas. Great! So what does that look like? Well, let me attempt to paint a picture: If you thought this part would be a bullet list, you will be sorely mistaken as it is not so easy to define. Him- The Dominant that I am searching for, as I stated before, would be my other half. I have MANY sides and nuances and so the person I need is someone who has all of the same sides, just on the opposite end of the spectrum. This is what I mean when I say I am searching for a unicorn as I am pretty sure it just doesn't exist. In the most base sense, I need someone who is 100% an Alpha Male. Yeah, I know that society today frowns upon men being men, but I also know that there are some that are still out there as it is just a part of who they are. I get toxic masculinity, but I also know there are many 'manly' men out there that aren't just a meathead. I have an extremely large and active primal side and it will not submit to just anyone, so that Alpha presense is needed. I need someone who can put me in my place and who isn't afraid to be rough at times. I love things like pursuit, take down, capture; CnC; wrestling; etc. If you made it past that part, the next thing would be someone who has more traditional views of a BDSM relationship. I am old school in a lot of my interests, wants, needs, and that zone in which I thrive. 24/7 M/s is where I find that I function the best. I love the depth of the relationship between a Master and a slave/kajira..but I also know how long it takes to foster the trust and depth of those relationships. I love the ritual and protocol of the M/s lifestyle and do extremely well in situations where everything in my life is controlled. This is not to say that only the daily that my outfits needs approved, but in like making sure my wardrobe is all choices that would be approved and they are sorted by occassions so that no matter what I would wear, it would be appropriate given the occasion and would have been approved. I understand there are not many who want the responsibility of how involved this type of relationship is and they do not want to control every ect of someone's life. They just want their bedroom play and that is it. That is great for those people, but not what I am looking for. I have a HUGE interest in the idea/concept of dollification. I know that most submissives/slaves may say that they want to be perfect for their Sir, but how many will go to the extent of actually doing it? This goes back to the slave mindset I believe in that I do want to be perfect for my Sir. If that entails changing hair color, getting tattoos, piercings, the type of clothing I wear, implants, waist training, etc...then so long as it is not illegal, it is want I would do/want with my Sir. This also includes sexual things such as stretching to be able to be fisted, or anal training, etc. This goes along with the 24/7 ect as typically enforced diets/excercise are a part of this. My masocistic side is weird. I am not a masochist in the every day sense that I crave pain all the time or that it gets me off. It fucking hurts. However, pain for me is a means of catharsis and for me to be able to process emotion as I have a terrible habit of just bottling it up instead of expressing it in the moment. The pain allows me to release all of that. My masochistic side is also very largely dependent upon the energy between my partner and me. I can take

I've been back and forth, since before Thanksgiving , with the contract I have on a cabin In WV. Unfortunately the agent was a flake. Over the years , I've bought and sold homes. This agent was a hot mess. Finally had to get the broker involved, and replace the her.   The present one is on the ball. D and I drove to the cabin and he checked it top to bottom. There were concerns from the home inspection, and he calmed my mind. He said the place had great bones, the windows were all in good shape, the hot water heater was two years old , gas furnace will out live me, metal roof is fairly new... There is a cottage on the property, off the back set back from the cabin.  Its about eight hundred sq. feet , plus a screened in front porch! Perfect for my father, and he can't fall off. It has a kitchen, dining room, living room, bedroom and full bath. It too has a new metal roof.   Added an addendum  for a few things, we'll see if they accept or counter. Saying a little prayer and crossing my fingers.   M.

So since I'm starting to look again for someone to bring into my dynamic i've had a few questions and statements as to why I am the way I am. I have PTSD for a few reasons. 1 relates to this lifestyle we arranged a hotel meet when the Mrs was still alive. We met what we thought was one person in a hotel room. It turned out it was an ambush and 2 other men were hiding in the toilet. I was beaten unconcious and they took turns on the wife without lube or protection. Then when I was out and they had finished with her they went to work on me. I was left with internal bleeding, left for dead and issues with my backside shall we say. So if I'm asking for patience or seem to take a step back, it probably has nothing to do with you as I do have flashbacks every now and again. If we do arrange a meet it would be somewhere safe first and there will be safe words and someone around just making sure everything goes ok, they will leave when I feel comfortable. If it ever does go to a 24/7 or prolonged meets, you may notice I do wake up in night terrors, it is to do with the above. I'd ask until I fully wake up just let me come around naturally.

Let’s contemplate the issue of energy when it come to sex among equals. As a rule nature is perceived as male and female, positive and negative, dry and wet, light and dark, cold hot; you get the idea. However if we add to these categories the fact that there are many ways in which these elements can manifest it becomes apparent that in nature these concepts are very fluid. There are many ways in which gender is conceptualize by cultures and more varied indeed is the manner in which gender roles are characterized. When it comes to love among equal genders these categories manifest but from the standpoint of strength which is the value of the male realm. Passive, submissive, or any other adjectives given to the bottom are but description of how the male strength choses to emerge in a male/male relationship; the same way when we use other adjectives to characterize tops. Any word and denomination is constraining and the truth is that there are many ways to be a bottom and many ways to be a top and the fluidity of these energies are always in a state of flux.  As a rule the male strength is always present regardless of the role we play in an intimate relationship. The strength and force of a male grip either using the hand, the mouth the anus, or the phallus is still a manifestation of that universal force that permeates all of us as we engage each other’s energy within the chosen role. That is a point of departure; there can not be a top without a bottom or vice versa. It is as I said before the natural order of things. No one can denny the fact that we are relating our energies in a sexual encounter as a male to male proposition but in a different degree of intensity which makes the encounter fulfilling and meaningful. The organs involved speak to the degree of energy engaged and no one can forget the fact that there is a male exchange of energies which is mutually fulfilling when done right.

I am not on your schedule! You would be lucky to be on mine, period! If you send me a message, I will reply on my own time and accord. If you are so impatient that you will delete the msgs sent to me, please keep that same energy!  If there are so many options out there, that you squander an opportunity with me then know.... I don't give second chances!    I easily get anywhere from 20-30 msgs daily, which makes it easy for me to get inundated or have lost msgs. So be patient, and possibly send a reminder to bump your msg or you can find me in chat and ask to speak with me there.      

I've been thinking a lot lately about the American Dream. Growing up, I wanted what I assume most middle class people wanted. It never occured to me that there was something else to want. You get married. You buy a nice house with a garage and a dog, have a few kids, keep your yard neat, and work 9 to 5 basically forever.  It's not what I want these days. I love my house, but I don't need it like I used to. All of the things are suddenly just things. Well yes, okay, I have intense feelings for some of my clothes. Mostly though, I think I could take my dog and drive away. Shouldn't I want this more? Want more more?  I'm at a crossroads in my career, in that I don't want to be doing this anymore, but I don't know what it is I want to be doing. I am not independently wealthy and I never did nab that husband, so a job it is. I would like to work remotely so I can hang out with my dog, or work somewhere she is welcome. I'm not sure what's out there and what will pay the bills. Part of me wants to sell everything and move somewhere to lead a less compicated life. I'm not sure I'm at the point where that would be enough. Then again, I weeded and put down mulch the other day. Who is this person? 

As the profile edit didn't pass inspection, here it is     This is not the profile of SensualOrgasmDom69. Please look elsewhere for that kind of thing       Fuck, I hate that this thing needs me to update my age       Lets get straight to the point. (and I added stuff!) (twice now) (scratch that, 3rd edit)        I am not a nice person. I am not here to find the love of my life.Least I don't think so, never say never.        I am not a ropes and floggers, leather and latex kind of person. This is not some bit of bedroom fun, but just who I am. Controlling, demanding, sadistic and generally uncaring when it suits me. I like to explore where others dare not, both with the body and mind.        What I am here to find is whatever takes my fancy. It could be easier to say what will not take my fancy. Demanding, princess types are certainly out, as are those who require a massive romance aspect. Sure I can offer affection when it suits me, but overall its not something that should be expected in bulk. Just something I can understand can be required much as a car requires an oil change every now and then. Heck, sometimes even I need that kind of downtime.       I am the kind that gives kink a bad name. I would happily take on one with poor self-esteem, not to "fix" them, but as a way of controlling them. Someone who will lower themselves to the level I desire, someone who can live without rights. I find interest in things normally unacceptable. I'm not that bothered about looks and such, I just want someone who will put up with whatever I throw at them.       I think D could be my favourite letter for what I want, downtrodden, dejected, dependant, desperate, doormat, perhaps even damaged. Even if you are not these, but want to be, or will be these at times, there could be opportunity.       I know what I seek is difficult to find, especially on a long-term basis, so I would perhaps consider other arrangements, chat only, occasionals, part-time and so on, although my preference is for something regular, on-going, something where there is time to build deeper trust, explore hidden alleyways of the minds, to actually learn each other.            I'm not likely to be on here much, it is very much a case of nothing ventured, nothing gained. However I do get mail notifications, so anyone who does decide to message me will be read soon after.       Totally single, can travel, can accommodate

February 9, 2024 - Sextoy69 visits when he gets off work to get ME off !     This is probably going to be a quick story. But things were a bit different today.   Normally when sextoy69 comes over for a visit he comes immediately after work. We head upstairs and he strips naked in the bedroom. Yes, there are a few guys that don't strip immediately upon arrival at the house, and he is one of them. Normally I play with his ass for a while with my fingers and toys while he is on all fours with his face and chest smashed into the bed mattress and his ass high in the air.   This time instead of arriving at 3:00, he had scheduled a bit later, at 5:30 today. When he arrived (promptly at 5:30) I asked if he worked overtime. He explained he went out and had a few beers with some coworkers after work. We headed upstairs and he took a detour to the bathroom as he often does. I heard him peeing for what sounded like an eternity. Peeing and peeing and peeing. I would imagine, from what I heard, he had about 3 beers. LOL   When he came into the bedroom, he was probably prepared to "assume the position" so that I could play with his ass. but I was already laying naked, face up, on the bed. I told him to come around to this side of the bed, climb up on all fours, and suck my cock as I play with his ass. I'm not sure if we've ever been in this position before. But I thought let's give it a try. Immediately after stripping naked he climbed on the bed and started sucking my cock.   Read the rest of the story at www.SirKel.top

**The Bear’s Den**   The air in his apartment was thick with the scent of leather and cedar, a primal musk that clung to my skin as I knelt on the cold hardwood floor. My wrists were bound behind me, the rope biting just enough to remind me of my place. At six foot two, I was no small man, but in his presence, I felt like a fragile thing, a hundred pounds of trembling need locked in a cage of my own submission. The chastity device around my cock was a cruel reminder of his control, its metal teeth grazing my skin with every futile twitch of arousal. I was his, utterly, and the weight of that truth made my chest tighten.   He loomed over me, a mountain of muscle and menace, his broad frame blocking the dim light from the single lamp in the corner. His name was Viktor, a bear of a man with a barrel chest, arms like oak trunks, and a beard that scratched my skin raw when he’d kissed me earlier, claiming my mouth with a hunger that felt like a storm. His eyes, dark and unreadable, held a sadistic glint that made my stomach churn with fear and desire. Yet, beneath that cruelty, there was a flicker of something softer—something that made me trust him, even as my heart raced with dread.   “You’re mine tonight,” he growled, his voice a low rumble that vibrated through the room. His massive hand gripped my chin, forcing my gaze up to meet his. “My little cock sock. You ready to be used?”   I nodded, my throat too dry to speak, the chastity cage tightening as my body betrayed me. His lips curled into a smirk, sinister and knowing, as he released my chin and stepped back, his boots heavy against the floor. He unbuckled his belt with deliberate slowness, the clink of metal echoing in the silence. My eyes followed the movement, hypnotized, as he freed himself, his cock thick and heavy, already glistening with intent.   “Open,” he commanded, and I obeyed, my lips parting as he stepped closer. The first thrust was brutal, filling my mouth until I gagged, my eyes watering as he held my head in place. “That’s it,” he murmured, his voice softening for a moment, a strange tenderness in his tone. “Take it like a good boy.” His fingers stroked my hair, a fleeting gesture of care that made my chest ache, even as he fucked my throat with ruthless precision.   The chastity cage was torture, my cock straining uselessly against its confines as he used me. He teased me with words, his voice a dark melody. “Look at you, so desperate, so denied. You’ll get nothing until I say so.” His laughter was low, cruel, but his thumb brushed a tear from my cheek, and I leaned into the touch, craving the warmth behind his dominance.   He pulled out abruptly, leaving me gasping, my lips swollen and slick. “Up,” he ordered, yanking me to my feet by the rope binding my wrists. My legs trembled as he led me to the bed, a massive iron-framed thing draped in black sheets. He pushed me face-down, my chest pressed into the mattress, my ass exposed and vulnerable. The air was cool against my skin, but his hands were fire, spreading me open with a possessiveness that made my pulse race.   “You’re gonna feel me,” he said, his voice dripping with dark promise. I heard the snap of a lube bottle, the slick sound of him preparing himself, and then the blunt pressure of his cock against my hole. I whimpered, the stretch immediate and overwhelming, my body resisting even as I craved it. “Relax,” he growled, but there was a gentleness in his grip, his fingers kneading my hips as he eased inside, inch by agonizing inch. The pain was exquisite, a burning fullness that made me feel alive, claimed, his.   He fucked me with a rhythm that was both punishing and deliberate, each thrust driving me deeper into submission. The chastity cage rattled with every movement, a constant reminder of my denial, my cock throbbing uselessly as he used me. “My perfect little sock,” he taunted, his voice tight with lust. “Made for this, weren’t you?” I could only moan, my mind fogged with sensation, the world narrowing to the heat of him inside me.   Then, without warning, he slowed, his thrusts shallow, teasing. I felt a new warmth, a strange pressure, and realized with a jolt what was happening. He was pissing inside me, claiming me in a way that felt filthy and intimate, a violation that made my caged cock ache with need. “Take it,” he whispered, his voice softer now, almost reverent. “Every part of you is mine.” The sensation was overwhelming, a mix of shame and surrender, and I whimpered, my body trembling under his weight.   He pulled out slowly, leaving me empty and aching, only to grab me by the hair and pull me to my knees again. “Open,” he said again, and I did, my mouth ready for him. The taste of him was sharp and bitter as he released another stream, his piss flooding my throat as I struggled to swallow, to please him. His hand cupped my face, his thumb tracing my jaw, and I saw that flicker of care again, a silent promise that he’d never push me past what I could handle.   When he was done, he knelt beside me, his massive frame enveloping me as he untied my wrists. “You did so well,” he murmured, his voice a balm against the raw edges of my submission. He kissed my forehead, his lips soft where they’d been cruel, and pulled me into his arms. The chastity cage remained, a final act of denial, but his warmth, his strength, made it bearable. I was his—used, claimed, and cherished in the dark, mysterious dance of our desires.

There's this man I know. He says he's not a nice guy. He listens intently to me ramble. When I apologize for it, he tells me not to because I like telling him things, and he enjoys that. There's this man I know. He says he's selfish. I've sent him cute things, naughty things. He never asks for them. He says he'll never pressure me, and appreciates when I do things of my own accord. There's this man I know. He says he's got an unquenchable thirst. I used to lay out opportunities that he'd reject. He says as much as he finds me attractive, there's a reason we've been friends for so long, and he likes having me around. There's this man I know. He says he's dark. I've told him all my insecurities. He's seen my lowest points, seen me spiral out, make terrible decisions. He's never made me feel ashamed. He's never kept them as leverage against me. He makes every bad step I take seem so incredibly small. There's this man I know. He says he's cold. His praises are detailed and specific. He says he's proud of me and that I should be proud, too. There's this man I know. He says he's uncaring. He once kept me company an entire day while I was unwell, just to help distract me from it. He barely knew me. There's this man I know. He says he's a bad man. He's honest. He's kind. He's funny. He's doting. He's patient. He's always on my side.  He's a good man, and I'm grateful to know him.

Master's WritingsStruggles of a Sapiosexual/Demisexual in a Hyper-Sexual WorldAs I have matured thru the years, it's now clear that without finding someone mentally, and emotionally attractive, it all just feels somehow incomplete. Without some connection to a real person with a genuine personality, they can be pretty and sexy, but . . . It really doesn't do it for me.And here in lies the problem.In today's hyper-sexual, transactional and instant-gratification society, how does someone like me, take the time to connect with another before the tug of physical exceptions frustrate the individual and kill the tempo.Yeah, I know. Its easy to say, I'm just not finding the right people who are also Sapiosexual/Demisexual, but we all know everyone is comprised of shades of grey and even those who lean in that direction feel the pressure of the "quick-fix".Not sure what to actually do about it, other than to continue to be clear up front about who I am, what my needs are during the "approach" and look harder for alignment with the individuals I talk with.But it is still frustrating.

Football Player experiences the Milking Machine October 30, 2023 - Football player experiences the MILKING MACHINE Football player came for a visit. And it's been quite a while. Quite a while since he has visited, and QUITE A WHILE since I have written a story. (Sorry, I've been both busy and lazy) Oh my God his visit was absolutely incredible. He got here at noon and left at about 2:00. He messaged me around 11am and said he would stop by at noon. By the time he got here I had been watching porn and had a nice hard on. Probably the last three or four times that he got here he wanted to suck my dick but I couldn't get hard because of a new medication my doctor had me on. I did not have that problem today, I was as hard as a rock. He was sucking on my dick for a few minutes and... Continued on http://www.SirKel.Top/?collarspace http://www.SirKel.Top/?collarspace

As an experienced Dominant in the leather community, I can certainly understand the appeal of consensual objectification within a safe, sane space. When I discover that my submissive derives pleasure from being treated as an object of desire, it elicits a complex range of emotions.   There is a sense of power and control, knowing I can shape their experience and push the boundaries of their submission. But there is also a deep well of trust and responsibility that comes with that. I must handle their vulnerability with the utmost care, ensuring their needs are met even as I strip away their agency.   It's a delicate dance, really.    On one hand, there’s the thrill of reducing them to a mere plaything for my enjoyment.    On the other hand, there’s the profound connection of being entrusted with their most intimate desires. It's a privilege to be granted that level of trust and intimacy. And with that privilege comes the duty to wield it wisely, to push just to the edge without ever compromising their safety or well-being.   Does that resonate with you? The heady mix of control and care, power and responsibility? Please speak to me, and let us explore this dynamic further in the confines of our sacred space.

Structured Devotion: The True Depth of Littles in D/s     i'm reshaping some of my older soundgasm posts and transferring them to audiomack for more streamlined platform.. this was one sparked by a common misnomer about littles like myself by the old guard members of bdsm..or to be more accurate the loud old guard members who say that is their education, background, and experience in the scene and yet tend to be always judgemental of the evolved nuances of archetype descriptors of dominants, masters, submissives, and slaves out there. so if you want a slightly more(i'm still wordy and keep my whimsy and little-ness in the recording in there) streamlined version of an older concept of mine back in june, check it out. Littles often face misconceptions about being undisciplined or solely playful, but the truth runs deeper. This audio explores the structured, dedicated side of being a little in D/s dynamics. It challenges stereotypes, highlights the growth mindset, and redefines what it means to live a 24/7 lifestyle. From compounding discipline to addressing outdated narratives, this is a journey into the balance of submission and personal development. Let’s break the myths and explore the truth together!

I just saw a profile that consisted of only a BDSM test. When I read it I realized something that is missing and likely is the most important thing. Where is the reference to interest in a real life encounter? Where is any reference relating to an actual time frame of when it might occur? So many of the kink or BDSM tests address interests but do not differentiate between those who want to masturbate to being a rope bunny and those who honestly want to be a rope bunny tomorrow, a week or a month from now. Being interested in being a slave is totally different than being a slave.  Someone who has slave tendencies or wants to be a slave someday is a waste of my time.  While I try to be understanding, I do not want to spend weeks, months, or years getting to know someone who might someday meet me in real life. I do not have any interest in exchanging erotica or demanding pornography.  If someone is not willing and able to leave their current life for a year or two, it does not mean that they are fake.  That is worth repeating, If someone is not willing and able to leave their current life, it does not mean that they are fake.  It does mean that even though our interest may align our timeline does not. I am mentally, emotionally and financially stable and could move a slave into my home anytime.  I can take care of myself and do not need a slave.  Having a slave in my home makes my life more comfortable.  My slave does all of my domestic duties, I provide rituals, structure and you will not be required to work outside my home or office. I do not want to rescue a woman who is in desperate need to leave her fucked up life.  I do not need to complicate my life with a whole lot of drama.  I accept that everyone will come with a certain amount of baggage but I live a happy, peaceful life in paradise. I am looking for a woman who has a desire to fully commit to a life as my slave.  Expereince, age, location is not as important as the desire and ability to meet in real life.  If you are at a point in your life where you are prepared to relocate within a resonable time then we should talk.

Doms always ask me about my libido, which, honestly, has hardly changed in decades. I've always been quick to arouse, easy to orgasm, always wet, outright sensual, and very sex positive. No, I'm not bragging, and I certainly realize I am one *very* lucky girl to be like this sexually, with nary a bump in my sexual lifetime roadmap. I'm so thankful for that!  But the rub is, no pun intended, that I have to have a connection with my lover. The longing honest erotic sexy loving trustworthy dominant to his cherished sub dynamic type of connection. I don't perform, I can't get it up (so to speak) without engagement, I belong, I attach, I become, I subsume with my guy with everything that makes us sexual beings, and of course that includes emotional, mental, and physical.  Once I feel that connection, and know from my head to toes that it is both strong and reverential, my sexuality becomes like a well tended plant, soon to flower, over and over, again and again, each time beautiful and unique. Oh, yeah, and hot af too!

Sexy contract drafted together with AI :) ---------------------------------------------------- Slave Contract This contract is entered into on [date], by and between [Dominant’s Name] (hereinafter referred to as "the Dominant") and [Submissive’s Name] (hereinafter referred to as "the Submissive"). Purpose: The purpose of this contract is to formalize the absolute power exchange relationship between the Dominant and the Submissive, where the Submissive completely surrenders all personal rights and autonomy to the Dominant. Terms and Conditions: Absolute Relinquishment of Rights: The Submissive irrevocably relinquishes all personal rights and autonomy to the Dominant, granting the Dominant absolute control over every aspect of the Submissive's life, including but not limited to physical, emotional, psychological, financial, and social domains. This includes the Submissive relinquishing all property to the Dominant. The Submissive chooses not to have any safeword, fully embracing the Dominant's control without any limits. Total Control and Obedience: The Dominant exercises absolute authority to dictate the Submissive's behavior, appearance, and actions. The Submissive must wear a collar at all times as a symbol of their complete submission and ownership by the Dominant. The Submissive must adhere to a strict dress code and behavioral rules as determined by the Dominant. Punishments and Physical Conditioning: The Dominant has the right to administer any form of punishment deemed necessary to enforce obedience, including physical punishment, marking, starvation, and any other methods to achieve the desired body size and features. The Submissive accepts that punishment is a crucial aspect of their training and will endure any form of discipline without protest. Body and Mind Modification: The Dominant has the unrestricted right to mold, modify, or alter the Submissive's body and mind in any manner deemed necessary, including but not limited to body size, shape, features, permanent marks, and psychological conditioning. The Submissive consents to undergo any procedures, treatments, modifications, or psychological conditioning as directed by the Dominant to fulfill the Dominant’s vision. Sexual Submission: The Submissive is always available to fulfill the Dominant's sexual desires, including the use of the Dominant’s cock, toys, or other means. The Submissive agrees to receive and endure public humiliation and to engage in sexual activities as directed by the Dominant. Surveillance, Chastity, and Recording: The Submissive consents to constant surveillance to ensure compliance with all rules and expectations. The Submissive will wear chastity devices or any other restraints as mandated by the Dominant to enforce control. The Submissive is required to perform on an OnlyFans account or similar platform, which will be owned and controlled by the Dominant. All content produced, including videos, and all money earned through this account are the property of the Dominant. The Dominant retains full ownership and rights to any films or videos recorded during the period of this contract. The Submissive acknowledges that these recordings may be used or distributed at the Dominant’s discretion without any compensation or objection from the Submissive. Irrevocable Commitment and Termination: The duration of this contract is to be set and agreed upon by both the Dominant and the Submissive before signing. This contract cannot be terminated by the Submissive during the agreed-upon duration. Any attempt to escape or disobey will result in severe punishment at the discretion of the Dominant. The Dominant retains the right to extend, amend, or terminate the contract at will. Transfer and Use by Others: The Dominant has the unilateral right to lend, rent out, or sell the Submissive to others, maintaining absolute control over the Submissive’s fate. The Submissive will comply with the commands of anyone designated by the Dominant without question. Clarification and Interpretation: Any uncertainties or ambiguities in this contract will be clarified and interpreted solely by the Dominant, whose decision is final. Verbal commands and clarifications by the Dominant are considered binding and enforceable as part of this contract. Total Submission: The Submissive enters this contract of their own free will, fully understanding the extent of the Dominant’s control and the harshness of the terms. The Submissive accepts that their purpose is to serve, obey, and please the Dominant in all aspects. The Dominant will not be responsible for any damages, physical or psychological, that the Submissive may incur as a result of this contract.   Signatures: [Dominant’s Name]   [Submissive’s Name]   [Witness or Notary, if required]    

I love face sitting... there's that first initial gasp when suddenly someone's tongue makes contact with you. it's a little cold at first, in a wet and exciting way. kind of like putting something minty on your skin. tongues, used well, are much more refined instruments than fingers. they can either cover more surface area or become pointed and extremely localized. this is how I prefer to start -- go extremely slow, hover between your legs so you can feel me breathing and maybe I kiss your thighs, ( more than likely since I turned on by tuning in). Very occasionally I flick my tongue over your vulva and you will yelp. I myself like it if at first I left your clit alone -- she's too sensitive for immediate onslaught and I want to pleasure you, play around for a while. This part feels crazy amazing; if your aroused you're already feeling a throbbing inside you but every time I suddenly lick you it's like all that interior feeling leaps to the surface and is crystalized in a bolt of warm juicy lightning. The best part of this early stage is that you don't know what's going to happen next. I try and surprise you. take a long pause, give you one lick, pause again, then three short licks in succession. You are all tensed up at this point, completely focused on the next moment my tongue will make contact, and feeling the desire to spread your thighs far apart to make room for all the need I am building up in you. I am now completely a part of your being, I have become one with you. Then I really get down to business, as while I love the teasing stage because for me it is my only chance to worship your body, I know you can't take it for too long. (I'll know because you'll make some frustrated vocal noises and be arching your pelvis towards me.) here is where I start exploring ""in the groove,"" as I call it, try long slow licking motions that start at your vaginal opening and go all the way up to, but don't QUITE make contact with your clit. then vary the length of the lick, the speed, and the shape of my tongue -- try pointy, then big and wide. In this stage your body relaxes; it's sort of like getting the most hyperbolically good massage of your life, and you can't believe how awesome it feels so you just sort of melt into it. Then I start working your clit and this is where you go bonkers. I try licking up to it -- stroke my tongue repeatedly from about half an inch below it right up onto it. Your vaginal walls are tensing like crazy at this point, and you are rotating your pelvis towards me because you can barely stand it but need more. Don't even have the words for this part -- I know it feels absurdly wet and sparkly for you, though the sensation is still happening on the surface at this point. If I'm doing my job well, at some point during this stage you will start to feel a strong, bodily premonition: you are going to cum. I visualize this shift as a change in WHERE the sensation is coming from: while before it was all in the little external sphere of the clit itself, at this point the clitoris's roots well inside have suddenly gone warm and tense. ( I have looked this up,---- the clit is misunderstood, it isn't just a little button but a really large interior structure.) they are grabbing all the muscles in your pelvis and squeezing. You begin to feel intentionality at this point: before you were just enjoying how absurdly good this feels, but now you are on a mission. You are going to orgasm your brains out. (for me), coming strongly involves your pelvic muscles, so I'll notice where you're at because I'll feel you contracting over me. You are probably also shifting your legs around at this point. Now, I can keep you on the verge for a long long time -- but whatever I do, I won't return to the teasing stage at this point. I'll focus on the groove as a path to your clit. when I do something in particular that increases that ""I am going to cum"" sensation in you, that's when you're most likely to exclaim ""YES"" or ""FUCK"" or ""OH MY"" or just ""WHARBARBALFGBLE."" And I keep doing that thing. There will come a point where everything in your body knows that you are going to cum IMMEDIATELY if the right sensations keep happening. As for me, this is the only time when I should focus entirely on your clit. I will know because you are clenching everything in your body. everything I do on the surface is sending warm, contracting depth charges of pleasure into your pelvis. You lose your ability to feel really subtle sensations at this point: I pick a repetitive motion and DIG IN. I might have to try a few different ones but I will find one that works. The part just before you actually cum is the best fucking part for me, oh Jesus. You are on a giant cliff-edge of more pleasure than you thought was possible and suddenly, all those clenched muscles relax for just a few seconds, everything is silence and slow motion and you feel a big, round, room filling sensation of OH ! MY! GOSH! Then you begin the orgasm and everything clenches back up, you are falling down the cliff and your vaginal walls are contracting so fast and furiously, and the sensation is one of pulsing nuclear bursts of intensity that you almost can't stand. It is probably hard to keep my tongue on you ( and in you )at this point, you are thrashing around, and my head is being squished so hard I am now in pain, but I won't stop, I promise. You need to get every possible pulse out of you, when you have, you will probably shiver and moan, and that's when you'll be able to relax again and feel a huge gentle wave of pleasure out to your fingers and toes. high five! good job! We did it, and I feel closer than ever to you, because I have brought pleasure to you

This was writen by one of my slaves, so I though I would post it here. Almost everyone wants something for nothing. Bargains Attract. Finding a good value excites almost everyone, so much so that we rush to share the news. Wanting anything for free is perhaps human nature. However, many of us have had to learn the hard way, again and again, that you get what you pay for. But cheap dishes, you’ll be replacing them sooner rather than later. You reap what you sow, this is also true of human interaction as well, and most people sadly, cannot put the two concepts together and compare them. Why do we think that people should respect us before we respect them? Why do we crave privacy and yet are often quick to invade someone else’s? Why do we think that others will be there for us, even if we aren’t available for them? Being part of the group, a house, friends, family, means being the same in return. It’s not an easy thing to do, in fact it’s rather time consuming.  Although the rewards are indisputable, we still find people who tend to hesitate, and wait, letting other people make the first move. First to commit, first to open their arms, first to open their house, first to be honest, first to be forthright, first to take action, speak their mind, and offer homage, first to everything.  Getting the other people to commit first, reduces our own effort, perhaps making it easier, but even with that said you will still receive according to what you give. He who gives little, receives little. He who risks nothing, gains nothing. Being able to see, comprehend, grock and utilize this principle simplifies our lives, not complicates it as so many would have us believe. Once we Master this principle of living, I believe we never forget it. Loving you has made me want to become a better person, I know I don’t often show it, But I do appreciate everything you do, most of all I appreciate the learning lessons. Thank you so much for having the patience to put up with me.

I'm a Marionette By Abba performed by Ghost    You're so free," that's what everybody's telling meYet I feel I'm like an outward-bound, pushed around, refugeeSomething's wrong, got a feeling that I don't belongAs if I had come from outer space, out of place, like King KongI'm a marionette, just a marionette, pull the stringI'm a marionette, everybody's pet, just as long as I singI'm a marionette, see my pirouette, round and roundI'm a marionette, I'm a marionette, just a silly old clownLike a doll, like a puppet with no will at allAnd somebody told me how to talk, how to walk, how to fallCan't complain, I've got no-one but myself to blameSomething's happening I can't control, lost my hold, it's insaneI'm a marionette, just a marionette, pull the stringI'm a marionette, everybody's pet, just as long as I singI'm a marionette, see my pirouette, round and roundI'm a marionette, I'm a marionette, just a silly old clown"Look this way, just a little smile," is what they say"You look better on the photograph if you laugh, that's okay""You're so free," that's what everybody's telling meYet I feel I'm like an outward-bound, pushed around, refugeeI'm a marionette, just a marionette, pull the stringI'm a marionette, everybody's pet, just as long as I singI'm a marionette, see my pirouette, round and roundI'm a marionette, I'm a marionette, just a silly old clown

You tell me not to worry.  But are we not all motivated by fear? Or desire? Are they two sides of the same coin? I crave climax but it is harder to come by. Do I need a new toy, or is the toy no longer enough? It's a strange thing to consider my libido as a post-menopausal woman? At whatever age, we are never properly balanced, hormonally. Our modern diet and lifestyle keep us out of whack. I am probably lucky I have a libido at all!  Should I tell you about the couple at the end of the bar? She was at least mid-40's, he was maybe a bit older, but both in fine fettle, and good looking. They seemed like a pair of old socks, but then he started groping her, his big hand planted just below her right breast, fingers spread wide. He rubbed her belly like she was a pet, but then would bring his hand back up. When he took his hand away, she crossed her arms. Was she trying to keep him away? When they stood to leave he wrapped himself around her from behind and she asked if he had always been such a big cuddler. She had a British accent, thus the use of cuddle.  Was I jealous? On my other side was a 9 year old boy with his dad. Equally entertaining!  I thought I would keep strolling, see what else I might wander into, but I decided to call it a day.  Now I can enjoy the Sunday scaries in the privacy of my own home. 

Normal is Weird Normal/typical/average is relative. Normal only exists in comparison, and for anything, there's probably "somewhere" where it's "normal." This is the internet age... there is something for people who share anything in common out there somewhere, and the ability to make it if there isn't. I don't know why people sometimes get an idea of normal in their heads, putting it on a pedestal and elevating it to unattainable levels, constantly comparing and defining themselves in comparison to that concept. Stranger still, why is it that so often those ideas of normal are so damn boring?! Anything really good (or bad), anything exciting or even different at all, wouldn't be "normal." You could only be normal if you were the same as most people around you. Normal seems just some shape/box to contort myself and my life to fit into. That seems like a lot of painful effort for little to no reward. Not to metion how much of it is beyond my control. My dad was 60, my mother 30, when I was born. Totally not normal. Totally beyond my control. Totally fine... great even... they were both wonderful, amazing people who taught me a lot and gave me many happy experiences, and I value happiness. I'd much rather be happy than be normal.

I’ve been sitting on an idea… and I think it’s time to bring it to life. I’m putting together a show called Hierarchy Protocol. A real space. A real house. Real people. For one week, a select group of submissives, slaves, and Dommes will live under structure. Roles will be assigned. Tasks will be given. Behavior will be observed. No fantasy. No hiding behind a screen. Just how you actually function. I’m not looking for everyone. I’m looking for people who are serious, who understand discipline, and who are willing to step into something real and be seen. This is still in the early stages, so I’m also looking for people who are willing to help build it—production, ideas, structure, whatever you bring that’s actually useful. So I’ll ask you directly— Would you be willing to step into something like this? Or help me bring it to life? If so… come talk to me. — Goddess Nikki

Move on....  That moment when you think you might be healed enough (do you ever really heal fully?) to maybe move on... To allow yourself the opportunity to connect again.To explore.To smile.To be vulnerable.To trust.To hope.To maybe even, g... fall in love. Instead, missed connections, pushed away strangers, lost opportunities. For what? Oh, what foolish dreams may come. Maybe someday...

*********************** STORY OF MASTER DENNIS AND I- IF YOU CARE TO READ******************* Master Dennis is a man who commanded attention without ever raising his voice there is this quiet confidence about him the kind that made people naturally listen when he spoke when I first met him I was drawn not only to his presence but also to the way he carried himself with patience discipline and certainty Serving Master Dennis became one of the most meaningful experiences of my life from the beginning he made it clear that trust was the foundation of everything before expectations were set he wanted conversations before rules were established he wanted understanding he believed that loyalty was earned not demanded as his sub my days became more structured he encouraged me to set goals maintain discipline and take pride in my responsibilities he expected honesty accountability and effort in return he offered guidance consistency and support Master Dennis has a way of noticing details others missed if I seemed distracted he would ask why if I achieved something important he acknowledged it he understood that a successful dynamic wasn't built on control alone it was built on mutual respect Over time our connection grew stronger I learned that submission wasn't about weakness it was about trust it was about willingly placing confidence in someone who valued that gift and treated it with care Master Dennis never took that responsibility lightly there were challenges along the way as there are in any meaningful relationship but each obstacle became an opportunity to communicate better and understand one another more deeply through those experiences I grew more confident more disciplined and more self-aware Looking back now what I remember most isn't the rules or rituals it's the feeling of being understood it was knowing that Master Dennis expected the best from me because he believed I was capable of achieving it Serving him taught me that the strongest Master is not the one who demands obedience, but the one who inspires it through leadership trust and respect  

FEEL MY CONTROL Need me to rub your belly???? Feel the warmth of my lip and gentle flow of my breath As I softly kiss around your naval My breast slide over your penis. You feel the warmth of my breath It's hard and pulsating   I can  feel it throbbing Tell me that you want me I stand and allow you to undress me I push you back on the bed Leaning over you, looking into your eyes, I place a kiss on your head So nice and hard I must taste Pulsating in my mouth Leaking a juice so sweet I crawl on the bed and pull you on top of me and tell you Put it inside me now!!! I am so aroused I cum quickly Working on my next explosion Grabbing you and pulling you deeper inside me I am taking every inch of you My breast are bouncing And you gentle hold them down as you suck pull and bite my nipples I tell you not to move I just want to feel myself grinding on you I cum again So nice and hot as it squirts all over us both I slap your ass and tell you fuck me hard We repo to a scissor position My knee bent to my face as you lean in for leverage I rub my clit as you are pounding my pussy I cum again I tell you to take your cock out and rub my juices around my pussy and ass I make you stand and I suck my juices off your cock and balls I play with your cock rubbing sucking and stroking. Massaging your balls, so very hard You moan and you want to grab my head and I tell you not to touch Edging you and then easing off I slow the licking and sucking down You have some much sweet juice just leaking I allow drops on my breast I rub the head over my nipples covering my breast with your juice I think shall I let you cum?   You say oh yes mistress please let me Are you going to be my good boy I do what you ask......ma'am please I turn and get on all four and tell you I want you to cum in my ass You enter very slow and gentle We get into an intense rhythm I can feel all of you I tell you to tell me what you want I want to cum in your ass Tell me again I want to cum deep in your beautiful black ass Harder and faster Baby make me feel it!! You know I am fixing to explode as you feel my body tremble Are you going to cum with me Oh yes mistress may I Oh yes we erupt together All nice hot and sweaty As I allow you to just relax on top of me and let your juices drain in me I then tell you to come lay beside me As you lay beside I rub him slowly until he falls asleep Are you nice and relaxed my pet........WOW  

Sir , You don?t have to be gay or bi to own male property. Yes , I know you Straight Alphas are here mainly looking for pussy to use and I also know you are looking for a female slave who will be compliant and obedient and do all of your housework , cooking etc? So , you are looking for two things 1 ? pussy to fuck 2 ? A slave to be a domestic slave and take care of all of your domestic needs. At the moment , you have neither. How many years have you had neither ? The option available is to use a faggot male gimp to fulfil your domestic needs. You don?t have to have sex with it ? hell , you don?t even have to look at it . Keep it hooded and in chains and put it to work. If you want to make it look aesthetically pleasing you could even keep it in head to toe latex, waist cinched, giant fake boobs , masked and in towering heels. From morning till night , you simply use it for all of your domestic needs. Cooking , cleaning , laundry , ironing , gardening , cleaning your car , maybe even put it to work in your business. You don?t even have to get out of bed to take a piss in the middle of your sleep at night. Just summon your gimp using your electro shock dog collar and have it come to you and open its mouth. It is always hidden out of sight , from friends and family. Stored in a pare room , garage or outhouse , caged or boxed and gagged when not in use. You carry on with your life much as you do right now . You still continue to seek out pussy. You see this gimp slave is merely an object in your eyes , a thing to make your life easier. It does not question , it does not make a sound ( as it is perpetually gagged ) it simply awaits instruction and obeys. ?An extra in my home is gonna cost me , financially? ? well , actually , not that much. Naturally, you have to feed and water it , but , this can be done in conjunction with your own intake. Just an extra meal or snack whenever you have one. When its daily work is done , you can use it as human furniture , or as an ashtray , so , it has more use there . Or, simply return it to its cage and lock it up for the night. No one will ever know that you have a male gimp object making life easier for you. This object is free to fulfil that domestic need for you Sir. It could be relocated to you if you set up the right environment i.e invest in chains and a cage or box to store it . This all makes sense Sir , please do get in touch.

Extra, too much, enough Dear men, Before you say I'm "extra" and "too much," ask yourself ... "are you even enough"? Compliments of the Single Woman. The right man will love you right.

                                     Slut Handler Most online kink exchanges are really anonymous. How else could a submissive woman cow a pack of amply testosteroned dominant males of dubious intelligence? My proven procedure for the education of said submissive is fulfilling and, at least for the female, informative.  I avoid any pregame chit chat and immediately put the worried slut on her knees with her wrists behind her back.  A collar serves a couple of functions and I like to lecture that it provides a symbol of complete submission. Importantly it also informs her who’s fuck toy she’s become. The collar needs to be firmly buckled and a short leash is appropriate for direction and control. Now things should become crystal clear but if there is any question, cuffing the soon to be sex slave’s wrists should render that question moot. I favor a short 4” chain.  Controlling an aroused woman requires more then guile. A finishing touch includes the firm placement of a ball gag. Make sure her hair is out of the way and the ball goes behind the teeth.    There you have it. She’s on her knees, collared, leashed, cuffed, and gagged.  And if she’s not hot and wet I’d be surprised  But wait, there’s more   All this preparation serves the ultimate goal.    <p style="margin: 0px; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-stretch: normal; font-size: 11px; line-height: normal; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size-adjust: none; font-kerning: auto; font-variant-alternates: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-position: normal; font-variant-emoji: normal; font-feature-settings: normal;

Catfishing is just catfishing plain and simple. If you put up younger images of yourself and then you scroll to the end and see the fit goth is now santa claus your emotions are a little defeated by the fact that the person you were sexually attracted to was the middle of the three stages of man but now looks like the last stage. Frustrating. I have updated my profile several times and I have not noticed a hidious delay in approval but I can't speak for others and their tech issues. When I exchange my images with other hopeful kinksters I am pretty sure I would get an ear full if the images I was sending was 10 to 15 years out of date.  I even make a point the image was taken a week ago.  The oldest image I have exchange was a month old. Just because your a man does not give you privileges to play the catfishing game. Luckily only had a brief discussion and did not hook up for drinks or I would have ordered the rum to process the catfish experience.

5 Traits Dominants Are Looking For In a Submissive YMMV: It's important to note that all relationships and personal preferences vary greatly among individuals. However, here are five qualities most Dominants are looking for in a D/s relationship: Trustworthiness: Dominant individuals often value trust as a fundamental aspect of their relationship. They seek a submissive partner who is reliable, honest, and can be trusted to communicate openly and honestly about their desires, needs, and boundaries. Respect and obedience: Dominant individuals typically look for a submissive partner who respaspects their authority and is willing to obey their instructions within the agreed-upon boundaries of the relationship. This involves a mutual understanding and clear communication about limits and consent. Subservience: Dominant individuals may desire a submissive partner who enjoys fulfilling their needs and desires, and who derives pleasure from serving and pleasing them. This can manifest in various ways, such as performing acts of service, physical or emotional intimacy, or engaging in specific power dynamics. Communication and responsiveness: Dominant individuals value a submissive partner who is attentive and responsive to their guidance and instructions. They may appreciate a partner who actively communicates their thoughts, feelings, and desires, allowing for a better understanding of each other's needs and preferences. Vulnerability and surrender: Dominant individuals often seek a partner who is willing to surrender control and be vulnerable within the established boundaries of their dynamic. This can involve the submissive partner relinquishing decision-making authority to the dominant and finding pleasure or fulfillment in their submission. Finally, it's worth mentioning that any relationship involving dominance and submission should always be consensual, built on trust, and characterized by clear communication. Both partners should have a mutual understanding of boundaries, desires, and consent, and should prioritize each other's emotional and physical well-being. Consent and respect should always be the foundation of any healthy relationship dynamic. "Now you know, and knowing is half the battle." - G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero.  

Ich + Ich - So soll es bleiben   Ich warte schon so langeAuf den einen MomentIch bin auf der SucheNach hundert ProzentWann ist es endlich richtigWann macht es einen SinnIch werde es erst wissenWenn ich angekommen bin Ich will sagenSo soll es seinSo kann es bleibenSo hab ich es mir gewünschtAlles passt perfekt zusammenWeil endlich alles stimmtUnd mein Herz gefangen nimmt Wenn es da ist, werd ich feiernIch weiß, da ist noch mehrEs liegt noch so viel vor mirIch lauf noch hinterherBis jetzt fühl ich nur die HälfteVon allem, was gehtIch muss noch weitersuchenWeil immer noch was fehlt Ich will sagen:So soll es seinSo kann es bleibenSo hab ich es mir gewünschtAlles passt perfekt zusammenWeil endlich alles stimmtUnd mein Herz gefangen nimmt Ich weiß nicht, wo du bistOder wo du wohnstAber eins ist sicherDass es sich lohntIch bete jede NachtDass ich dich finde Und du sagstSo soll es seinSo kann es bleibenSo hab ich es mir gewünschtAlles passt perfekt zusammenWeil endlich alles stimmt So soll es seinSo kann es bleibenGenau so ist es gutAlles passt perfekt zusammenWeil endlich alles in mir ruht Yeah...Oh...Yeah...Oh...Yeah... So soll es seinSo kann es bleibenSo hab ich es mir gewünschtAlles passt perfekt zusammenWeil endlich alles stimmtUnd mein Herz gefangen nimmt    

    11/07/2024    Take Notice    I will be unavailable until further notice.      The noted positions have not been filled ...    For those that meet preferences and follow direction       I may or may not be checking in periodically.   

Ann's Deep Rub Facial The following is part of a much longer story I have written. I will not be presenting it here as much of it would not pass censorship. TEST ONE At the back door there was a note “I am in the study. Make me black tea and bring it, with cream, to me.” My face flushed with excitement. I made the tea and took it to the study. I stood there, in my short little pleated cheer leading skirt and sweater, looking for a place to set down the tea and condiments. MRS. MARQUIS, who was reading, did not bother to look up. After a while she indicated the little table near her. I moved the little box aside and sat the tray down. MRS. MARQUIS appraised what I had done and commented that it would take a while to train me properly. While I remained standing she indicated I should pour her tea with an impatient gesture of her hand. Then she added cream to her tea and then stared rather contemplatively at my chest. After a while she spoke. “Are you ready for another test?” I answered in the affirmative. “You will go to the hall closet and bring me one of the pairs of riding gloves you find there. Make sure it is the oldest most beat up of the lot.” There was riding equipment in the closet. Including riding boots, crops and a couple buggy whips. The gloves were laid out on a rack. It took just a second to find a pair that was a little scuffed. All the others looked new. I returned to MRS. MARQUIS. I offered her the gloves. “Put them on me, stupid.” It was very strange to put gloves on another persons hand so I fumbled around a bit. “Don’t you think it would be easier if you knelt?” “Yes of course,” I said as I sank to my knees. “You are not very good as a supplicant. But then you have had no training. Would you like to learn more about yourself and service?” “Yes” I was stammering again. “Well we shall begin. You have offered, yesterday, to endure discomfort for my pleasure. What would please me now would be to slap that insipid face of yours. Put your hands behind your back Grab opposite fore arms. Arch your chest forward. Hold your face up. Very good. Now I will slap your face from side to side, by the way, you should know that I am using old gloves because you are not worthy of the new ones. I would not want to scuff a good glove on your face. You will return your face to a forward looking position quickly after each slap. Are you ready?” I stammered a “yes”. “Good.” My face stung furiously after just the first slap. But I brought it back to the ordered position. “Quicker” was the order. Again the slap. I learned to keep my mouth shut when my teeth cut the inside of my mouth. I returned my face to the requisite position, only to learn that I was not fast enough. I got quicker, in spite of the pain, so quick that she could swing as fast as she wanted. My eyes red from tears. But before I lost clear vision I could see the look of extreme pleasure on her face. This slapping continued for what seemed an eternity.When she stopped my ears were wringing and my vision red. My face felt like it was covered with Deep Heat Rub. I was sobbing. She pulled me to her. Close to her. As I knelt, she pulled my face to hers and kissed me gently on the lips. Later she put my face to her breast. I knew my tears were leaving dark spots on the garment she wore. “There, there my little bitch it is not so bad now. Is it?”

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