The M/s lifestyle is an extreme form of structured relationship, and what makes it powerful is that it’s built on choice and consent. The surrender of power by the slave and the assumption of responsibility by the Master isn’t casual—it’s intentional, serious, and often lifelong. At its best, it creates a dynamic where both roles are deeply fulfilled: the Master gains purpose through leadership, structure, and control, while the slave gains purpose through service, clarity, and the comfort of being fully owned.   What stands out to me is that it magnifies truths about human connection that already exist in all relationships: people crave trust, guidance, being seen, and being valued. M/s strips away the pretense and makes those elements explicit, codified in rules, rituals, and expectations. It’s not easy—because maintaining authority and surrender 24/7 in a modern world takes enormous honesty, discipline, and commitment. But when it works, it creates a bond few other dynamics can match, one that is both practical and profoundly emotional.

Compelled  compelled to Dominate Men. No matter how much she tried, no matter what she wore, her mirror, overwhelmed her with Dominant Femininity. An aura of command perfumed the atmosphere. Exotic, clinging, rising upwards from her hips. Intoxicating any man foolish enough to look in her direction.   With greater frequency and intensity the Dominant Cravings filled her heart with glee.   Experience taught her that the less she cared about her object of submission, the greater her excitement and consequently her satisfaction.   By encasing the object in a leather or rubber hood, it became a flesh and blood pleasure unit. A thing to torture. A quivering, drooling, grunting and sweating thing. She panted with laughter at the thought of her wicked ideas becoming reality.   She had but to dial the phone to summon a pleasure unit. Satisfying to be sure, however, not nearly as much fun as putting a vanilla subject under her heel.  

What can we get from this chapter of the bible symbolically?    Edom: Kingdom of Esau (carnal mind/flesh) Jacob: Tribe of Judah (spiritual mindset)   Well we can see throughout scripture that the Edomites were disregarding the spiritual things and had a carnal mind. They took things by force and lacked patience for cultivation and growth. They were prideful and they held grudges and were hateful.  God pronounced judgement on them for their pride and for them not letting Israel pass through safely. He said because they say who can bring me down that He would bring them down and have them despised.    Edom stood by when strangers took captivity of Jacob's army. Edom was a brother to Jacob who is in the Tribe of Judah. Yet Edom acted like the strangers which took Jacob's army into captivity. Do not gloat, rejoice, speak arrogantly, or stand at a crossroads to slaughter the escapees when the Tribe of Judah is attacked because the day of the Lord against all the nations is near. The way you treat others will come back on your own head. There will be no survivors of the house of Esau and the house of Jacob will become a fire to set the stubble ablaze and consume Edom. The kingship will be the Lord's. The ones who care about their spiritual health and have a relationship with the Lord will be safe but those who continue in the flesh will be wiped away. There is more to life than fleshly desires and carnal things.    Those who are in Zion and left over in Jerusalem will be called holy. The survivors whom the Lord calls. Zion can refer to the "pure in heart". Jerusalem means city of peace and holy. Jerusalem is also used as a symbol for the redeemed state of humanity and also signifies a place of deep religious connections, divine presence, and the pursuit of peace.    Get in Jesus while you can and remember to be loving towards everyone. Don't be fleshly carrying out the desires of the flesh. Have a spiritual appetite for the spiritual things. And remember don't gloat or rejoice in someone's downfall. Love your enemies it's commanded and judge not. Be encouraging with one another lifting each other back up. If you love Jesus you will observe his commands and he will love you back. Faith without works is dead. Come on!! It's time to wake up from our slumber and cultivate a relationship with Jesus. He's coming back and coming soon. Will you be fo und ready? 

How I Think About This Life There's a difference between Dominants and Masters that most people . Dominants and submissives live this episodically, in scenes, in chapters, in hungers that get fed and return. It's something they do. For those at the deeper end of the pool it goes further than that. It is fundamentally different. It is woven into who they are. It can't be set down because it was never picked up. It is simply there, part of who they are.  When they aren't living in alignment with it, they feel something is missing. If you've done scenes, found satisfaction, and then felt the hunger return unchanged as if you'd fed the wrong appetite entirely, sit with that. It may not mean something was wrong. It may mean you've been reaching for the right thing in the wrong form. That isn't to say that a lifestyle that's built around playtime scenes is wrong or lesser, just that if it isn't scratching the itch you feel fully, mere domination may not be what you need. From my perspective, dominance is about the application of power in a given moment. Mastery is about depth, about how completely you're committed to understanding and fully expressing a woman's unique nature. I use dominance as a tool of Mastery, not its definition. What I'm after isn't the performance of control but its reality, to shape a willing partner into their deepest perfection as I see it. Dominance is the moment. Mastery is the journey. That journey begins with genuinely knowing her. What moves her. What holds her back. What she hasn't yet given herself permission to want. What she doesn't yet understand about herself. I hold what many people today would call an anachonistic (and often misogynistic) view of a woman's nature and her place in a dynamic. It is not a lesser place, simply a different one.  A hammer and a screwdriver serve different purposes, and each performs terribly as the other, yet they are both equal.  Dominance and submission is a response, in many ways, to how our society has tried to homogenize the roles of men and women in a way no different than demanding we accept hammers and screwdrivers as being equaly capable of fulfilling each other's roles.  I believe far too many women today struggle with happiness precisely because they have accepted society's rejection of traditional gender roles socially and sexually. I've seen women who feel peace and gratification when they submit in the bedroom, then can't understand why they're angry and frustrated when they live the rest of their lives trying to pretend to be the same as men.  Some women can navigate society's definition of "equal" just find, but submissive women need a place to express something core to their being that isn't satisfied in that space of equality.  For some, submission in the bedroom fills the need adequately, but if you're still feeling that hunger to submit, if scenes aren't fully feeding your need, I believe that's why. Do not mistake me: I do not see women as in any way lesser than men, only different. There are highly compentent women in every field and skill; I simply believe that a woman need not sacrifice her femininity, nor a man his masculinity, for the sake of equality, and that society's attempts to do so are why so many women (and men) are dissatisfied today.  It is mind-boggling to me how so many people can recognize the fundamental difference between equality and equity in relation to (for instance) disabilities, yet contend that equality between men and women is natural.  If you have a womb and I don't, equality isn't possible, period.  Equity, however, is. I don't apologize for those beliefs and I'm not interested in debating it. What I mean by that isn't contempt. It means I think femininity carries something specific and profound and inextricably linked to submission.  A something that goes to one's core, and that a woman who understands and inhabits that space rather than arguing with it is capable of a submission that most people in this life never actually find. I find that kind of woman extraordinary. Truly a priceless masterpiece to be treasured, and conformed to my vision of their perfection not harshly, but with firm confidence. My approach has always carried a 1950's quality to it, in the best expression of that era (which most certainly wasn't always its reality). The structure of domestic life has always served, for me, as an expression of the dynamic.  That particular kind of submissive femininity that finds meaning in service and in the rhythms of a household held to a standard, the rituals of daily life weaving the texture of the dynamic. The aesthetic matters to me as well: a woman in a well fitted A-line dress over stockings and a garter belt, moving through a home with intention and grace is, to my mind, one of the most beautiful things there is. It is simply where my sense of how this life is lived most fully has always landed. It certainly isn't for everyone, and I"m not saying it is better, only that for those for whom it fits I believe it is most satisfying.  I'm drawn to a woman who makes pleasing me her partner her quiet art, whether we are in a relationship or not.  I love enging with a woman who wants to be formed and shaped into her most fully realized self, who finds in that not diminishment but the truest expression of what she is.

Collarspace guidelines prohibit "trans exclusionary hate speech, consensual non-consensent, things which are unlawful, othering, culturally insensitive or hurtful". This and similar is common across social media. It's as if PC Principal has invaded and occupied our online spaces: https://youtu.be/Vvc1nxlJb-o?si=Jn3aS5FR-HX_E-8F

I've been back and forth, since before Thanksgiving , with the contract I have on a cabin In WV. Unfortunately the agent was a flake. Over the years , I've bought and sold homes. This agent was a hot mess. Finally had to get the broker involved, and replace the her.   The present one is on the ball. D and I drove to the cabin and he checked it top to bottom. There were concerns from the home inspection, and he calmed my mind. He said the place had great bones, the windows were all in good shape, the hot water heater was two years old , gas furnace will out live me, metal roof is fairly new... There is a cottage on the property, off the back set back from the cabin.  Its about eight hundred sq. feet , plus a screened in front porch! Perfect for my father, and he can't fall off. It has a kitchen, dining room, living room, bedroom and full bath. It too has a new metal roof.   Added an addendum  for a few things, we'll see if they accept or counter. Saying a little prayer and crossing my fingers.   M.

As required by my Dom, I publicly declare the following: I am subMeghan, and as I type this this, whenever I am here on CollarSpace, I am to remain completely nude, except for my dog collar and glasses… Today’s Journal Topic Is: I Am Now On CollarSpace Chat!   One of many fantasies my Dom/Hubby has for me is to be a webcam model.  He just loves the idea of me being completely nude in front of an unseen audience of men who I interact with and ultimately masturbate for them.   For a variety of reasons, that is simply never going to happen. Neither of us want to actually make that a reality.  However, we did come up with a way for me to come as close as I can to doing this. For the past few months, I have been playing around with CollarSpace’s chat rooms.  The first few times, I would only pop in for a few minutes, see what people were talking about, then quickly exit. The first time someone requested a private chat with me, I freaked out and exited the chat altogether.  I was such a wimp!  LOL However, over time, I’ve gotten used to it and have had some really enjoyable conversations with some of you all.   A couple observations so far. 1> Collar Space chat can be really buggy.  Getting booted out happens a lot! 2> Chat users are way more nice to me than I expected.  (I’ve previously written about how abusive some of the messages I receive can be.) 3> More often than not, users are more interested in chatting than roleplaying. 4> Male subs seem to be quite needy.  (This is just an observation, not a judgement.)   My Dom’s chat guidelines for me are as follows: 1> Of course, I am always to nude at all times.  I am to disclose that I am nude if asked or appropriate. 2> Be gracious, courteous and friendly. 3> Answer all questions honestly.  However, I may decline to answer any question that I deem to be inappropriate. 4> There are no taboo or inappropriate topics. 5> I do have to tolerate rude, abusive users.  I have the discretion to terminate any conversation that I am uncomfortable with or deem to be unacceptably rude or abusive. 6> At my discretion, I may engage in any roleplay scenario that I feel comfortable with. 7> During roleplay, I am allowed to submit to other online Doms.  However, my Dom’s/Hubby’s rules/limits always supersede any other online Dom’s commands. 8> During roleplay, if possible, I am to attempt to physically implement whatever I say I am doing.  For example: If I say that I am putting clothespins on my nipples, then I need to actually put clothespins on my nipples, etc. 9> No webcam, no video, no photos.  Sorry, not going to happen.   I do not plan on having any kind of chat schedule.  If I’m there. I’m there.  If I’m not, I’m not. If you see me on chat, feel free to just say Hi.   subMeghan  

MstrB writing from midtown been looking for one decent slave for some time now it will be well trained for a variety of domestic services and hopefully for the slaves sake it is able to learn from its corrections …even better if it already knows exactly what it’s good for!  ...all its further educating will be done with a strap kept very close by.... it will be made to understand it has no rights no privileges no freedom to come or to go without asking for and receiving  express permission  so much in life is correctly forbidden to a slave  and it must be reminded of this consistently if not constantly slave has no secrets no privacy or much time alone and certainly no participation or place in any considerations or discussions about things going to be done with the slave in fact it has no say in much of anything slaves Owner will have full authority over the slave and its affairs and will use that authority very strictly I am understanding of slaves condition I am sympathertic to its plight and always give a slave what it needs but allow very little of what it wants this is both an Owners prerogative over the slave as well as an extension of a kind of parental authority therefore no disrespect or disobedience will be permitted ...ever! MrB   ------------------------------------------------------------------------       I use…and enjoy very much using… real discipline- isolation- humiliation-lots of busy work in the home...all to train a female to a level of acceptable domesticity…sort of housebreaking the slave…teaching both the need for her focused Obedience and the necessity to perform with humility and accuracy whatever is demanded from her chores chores chores…so much to be done….so many things to attend to... upon collaring slaves pussy will be immediately closed for business as her chastity must be clearly established for the oversexed sluts own good...she will have no orgasms until permitted ..her hands fingers etc will be kept from her vaginal area except for purposes of good hygiene and then only under direct supervision...
 rule of thumb...a slave will be fully given what she needs and very very little of what she wants. so I am here seeking full Ownership of such a woman and she would do well to have a real slave personality....certain qualities will be emphasized in her training as more wanted than others...humility for instance...a highly prized quality that can't be stressed enough and that is wholly attractive to see when presented with sincerity …she will be shown how to provide service as the Obedient intelligent servant she was born to be… she will complement my life and basically make things easier for me in whatever way she is called on…as a relationship develops between Owner and slave she will come to appreciate more and more the kinds of support and guidance given to her... she will learn to approach her Owner with nothing less than demonstrable Respect under all circumstances… her training in how to properly submit herself will never really end so her attention will be directed to intellectual things I will insist she consider and think about...adult slave lessons on a cerebral level… she will be stripped, anally plugged and put into a submissive position on her knees or perhaps ordered to freeze on her tiptoes... she will then be closely questioned about these things…her answers are required and truly valued… she must be responsive and forthcoming to all questions about her feelings her moods and her progress in becoming more servile and useful..the point being to make her a better servant and a more responsive slave....these interrogations and her confessions of her feelings will be a ritual she will learn to anticipate and expect …the reasons for them are simple..I want her to be fully aware of her condition in this lifestyle and in my life most of all…she belongs to me as my property and she is subject to my discipline my control my desires and decisions for her… I want her to learn to accept and in the end embrace the benefits she enjoys thanks to me because I do what I think is best for her… I will do whatever needs to be done to turn this woman into the best slave she can possibly be …I am a sexual sadist all my life and knew this when I was about eight or nine though I had no idea of the implications…
I use many forms of personality and behavioral techniques.. real discipline, humiliation, isolation, very tight bondage, sensory dep... whatever I find has the greatest effect on her emotions.. I will happily enforce her Obedience until she learns to respectfully offer it...one way or another I will get what I want from her…she will be trained to domestic service of various kinds...she will be watched closely and fairly judged on how well she performs these tasks and she will be unfailingly punished when she fails to do them as instructed...her good service is a pure reflection of her Respect for her Owner and her place in his life... her Obedience is the essence of her slave self....to be useful in all ways and show that she knows her place at all times is one of her many goals as the slave she is.... and her training will center heavily on perfecting her attitude as she is carrying out the tasks given her ...no matter what the work or activity is, it must be performed with a pleasing attitude...with humility... and if not?...
so many reasons a woman offers to give her a memorable correction…as though a reason were even needed.  I am open for discussion of all issues which will come up and need to be addressed to keep things balanced and harmonious between Owner and slave…she will be safe and protected from as much of the outside world as she wants to not have to deal with... I welcome the amazing emotional connections that come from a successful M/s relationship and take full responsibility for what I do !... not everything can be solved with a strap but for a true slave? nothing else will do……McB  

Deal or No Deal?Deal breaker is, 'no sense of humour!'I will put up with a lot of stupid shit but thats a hard limit for me lol! This profile is written wiith some tongue in cheek humour, as we spell it in the former UK. Readers need to 'get it' and take that onboard. Put another way Good Sense Of Humour (GSOH) is required to have dealings with me. And as it says on my FL profile, "Please note: taking the piss is only enacted in the context of consensual humiliation, degradation and taking the piss play, I hope that's clear!" Now read on lol..☠️☠️☠️

I am finally in WV! It was a hectic past three months.  I don't know what I would have done without  my wonderful Dom, Tony! It has taken four days to recover from the stress of moving.  With the weekend packing, loading,  renting a huge cargo van, driving 6/7 hours, unloading and driving back for four weeks straight.  All while working and saying goodbyes.  Add to this, two parents having their separate issues, and projecting them...it's over! I'm in a cabin with my pets. Tony and I are working on adjusting. He trying to find a remote position, so he can come this way. Me trying to adjust to an area I have never been , and know not a soul here. Setting up utilities, , registering, making sure mail gets to me,  and all the things that go with a huge move. I'm still unpacking, and then I have to get the cottage ready to lease.  That will be a bit weird for me, I reeeeally like my privacy. But I need to set up passive income.   Lots to do, I miss you Tony💙💙   M.

A trip to the vending machine   I'd like to share this little experience I recently had the honor of partaking in with a willing local masochist friend. If she happens to read this and recognize herself in the story, knowing her, she would love the extra humiliation :)   We were spending some time in a hotel room together when I informed my friend that I have an exciting and cruel ordeal planned for her today. First I ordered her on all 4 on the floor at my feet and removed her butt plug before placing it in her mouth. Next a hose and with a funnel was placed in her ass and I emptied my full bladder completely in her rectum. This warm piss enema was plugged with an inflatable plug and her ass inflated. Next I ordered her to stand and clamped her nipples painfully, finally a humming dildo slid into her pussy which was already dripping wet. I began to dress her slowly, soaking up her discomfort as the bra went over her clamped nipples and the jeans zipped up in place over the dildo and butt plug. Her eyes never left me the whole time, the butt plug still in her mouth where I had left it, I saw her pupils widening as I finally began to apply the face mask over her mouth and nose and it dawned on her that not only is she leaving the hotel room retaining a piss enema, double plugged and clamped, but she'll also be sucking on her used butt plug the whole time.   "Here are your instructions, fucktoy, now that you're properly outfitted for a walk. I am thirsty and I would like a soda from the vending machine. The bad news I have for you is that there aren't any on this floor, so be a good girl and walk up the stairs, grab me a coke and yourself a drink, then hurry back-here is my card. I don't want you using the elevator,  only stairs, and when you are back kneel at the door, knock and wait to be let in" She nods quickly in the affirmative as she begins to shuffle towards the door trying to reconcile the various sources of ovetstimulation.   I watch her with excitement as she disappears slowly down the hallway towards the stairs, each step full of anguish for my sadistic pleasure. When she returns and  I see her waiting for me obediently kneeling at the hotel door, a huge smile spreads across my face as I step aside holding the door for her to crawl in with our sodas.   I lean forward and pick her up in my arms, whispering "good girl", as I set her on the bed, pulled her jeans down and placed my tongue directly on her twitching clit, licking and sucking until she exploded under me. 

Picture it Feb 14, 20?? (to protect the innocent). A friend of mine was getting married. I always had a little crush on his girlfriend but I would never do anything to jeopardize their relationship. Little did I know that she felt the same way about me, and I was about to find out. The day before of the wedding she called me up and asked if I could help her with a few things.She gave me the address and told me to stop by. When she opened the door she was wearing a robe and holding two wine glasses. She invited me in and we sat on the couch. We started talking about tomorrow's events and she said her feet were killing her from practicing walking around in the high heel shoes. She asked me if I could give her a foot massage. I rubbed her feet and I could tell she was really getting into it. She was at the nail salon earlier and didn't want to chip a nail and asked me if I could help her at a shower. So we went into the bathroom and she took off her robe. Now up to this point we only gave each other hello or goodbye hugs, and now she is standing in front of me naked. I am trying not to stare but she is in great shape. She told me to get undressed and into the shower with her. I washed & conditioned her hair, washed her body, shaved her airpits, legs, and pussy too. She asked me why I never made a move on her and I told her I didn't think she was interested in me. She said that's too bad, after tonight it is going to be to late and I will never have this chance again. We kissed a litttle, I got her dried off and into bed and I went home. I saw her the next day at the wedding and she was beautiful. The wedding went on with no problems and as far as I know, my friend has no dea how she spent her last night as a single woman.

Dear Diary Tonight, the air is electric, charged with the power of MY presence. As the moonlight bathes MY skin, I feel the pulse of the universe within ME. Every beat echoes with the knowledge that I AM the embodiment of strength, beauty, and authority. To MY devoted submissives, know this: when you serve ME, you are not just serving a woman—you are serving a force of nature. Your obedience is the tribute you offer to the divine energy that flows through ME. Each task I set before you is a test, a ritual that draws you closer to the essence of your purpose: to please and honour your GODDESS. When you kneel before ME, you are not just submitting your body, but your soul. Your surrender is sacred, a powerful exchange that binds you to ME in ways deeper than flesh. In your submission, you find liberation. In your obedience, you discover the true meaning of devotion. Remember, MY desires are not just commands; they are opportunities for you to prove your worthiness. Every whisper of MY voice, every glance from MY eyes, is a call to action—a call to show ME the depth of your loyalty and the extent of your adoration. So, listen closely, MY devoted ones. The night is ours, and in its darkness, your true nature will be revealed. Serve ME well, and you will find the fulfilment that only the Black Goddess can offer. BLACK GODDESS 

It's so funny when a person contacts you and insist on doing things their way and ignore what you ask for. They were so insistant on "their" way that  I even told them they are probably dominant, they claimed that they were definitely submissive.... NOW, just a few days later; alllll of a sudden you get a message saying that they don't think that we are a match (what I told them in the first few emails   LOL) and block me for some reason. I was nothing but nice to them.  Hate to tell them I get a lot of emails so I had to look at history to even remember who the hell they were so the block doesn't really bother me  lol   was just going to wish them good luck and to stop by and say hello sometime..... yes I'm so evil   LOL and NOW allllll of a sudden they change their profile to Dominant.....LOL   Sounds like someone just wants to jerk off so now we are going to try Dominant since no one seemed to fall for the "I'm a poor pitiful submissive" routine  LOL   These people make me laugh   LOL  

¡Hola! Publiqué una nueva entrada en mi blog... ¡y no es una receta de cocina! ¿a quién le gusta el jengibre? https://amaasht.art.blog/2022/10/05/figging I just made a new post in my blog... and isn't a recipe... who likes ginger? 😈😈😈❤❤❤https://amaasht.art.blog/2022/10/07/figging-english-version/

PLEASURE MOMMY!!!   I raise my leg and pull the leash placing your face up against my mound.  You can feel the warmth as I grab the back of your head pushing your face up into my pussy.   I tell you to open your mouth so you can taste my sweet nectar.   You love that taste your nasty little slut!   While holding your leash tight I tell you to lick me slowly and then tongue fuck me till I tell you to stop!!   Moving my hips from side to side slapping you with my thick thighs........I pull you in closer   BITE ME YOU SLUT MAKE MOMMY SCREAM!!! I cum so hard I fart in your face and you never miss a lick.   I grab your chin and bend over to lick my juices off your face.   I slap your face!!   Then push your head back and straddle your face so you can continue to please me.   Finger my ass while you tongue fuck me!!!!...................WOW

As a Master I envision my role as more than just a mere figure in their lives, but rather as a sentinel, a guardian who stands at the forefront of their futures. It's an inherent part of my responsibilities and duties to shield them from harm, while also steering them in the right direction. In this world filled with endless possibilities, paths and unforeseen challenges, I perceive myself as the beacon of light that navigates them through their journeys.  Moreover, it is my explicit role to ensure they become the most refined versions of themselves. I do not wish for them to merely become part of the crowd, but to fully embrace their uniqueness and potential, and ultimately realize the zenith of their capabilities. The world we live in is diverse and enriched with various talents, abilities, and strengths. Therefore, I bear the responsibility of kindling the spark within them, helping them unearth their hidden talents, fostering their skills, and aiding them in scaling new heights of achievement.  It's crucial to understand that it is not about trying to mold them into something they are not, but rather assisting them in tapping into the reservoir of potential that lies within, to become the best versions of themselves. This entails encouraging them to consistently strive for excellence, motivating them to surpass their limitations, and helping them cultivate an indomitable spirit that cherishes the pursuit of learning, growing, and evolving.    

PLEASE READ CAREFULLY DO NOT SEND DICK PICS OR NUDES NOT INTERESTED IN SEXTING I DO NOT WANT A SUGAR DADDY I DO NOT HAVE AN ONLYFANS ACCOUNT NOR DO I WANT ONE I'M NOT LOOKING TO MAKE CONTENT WITH ANYONE I DON'T WANT YOUR MONEY I'M NOT HERE TO TRADE PICS OR VIDEOS I AM NOT LOOKING FOR FWB NOT LOOKING FOR OR WANTING HOOKUPS. DO NOT CONTACT ME REGARDING HOOKUPS PERIOD. I DO NOT SUB OR PLAY OVER THE INTERNET. I'M NOT HERE FOR SEXTING I'M NOT INTERESTED IN BEING PART OF A COUPLE/POLY RELATIONSHIP MY HARD LIMITS AND BOUNDARIES ARE ANYTHING ILLEGAL, ANAL, ANIMALS, DRUGS OF ANY SORT, ANYTHING TO DO WITH HUMAN OR ANIMAL WASTE. DO NOT PUSH MY LIMITS/ BOUNDARIES OR YOU WILL BE REPORTED AND BLOCKED. ADDITIONAL HARD LIMITS/ BOUNDARIES FACE FUCKING, GAGGING, HUMILIATION,VOMIT, THIS WILL BE UPDATED WHEN AND IF I FIND MORE LIMITS AND BOUNDARIES.

Your Rage Is Somebody's Business Model   You keep complaining that you're stuck. Ugly, broke, invisible, cursed by genetics and bad luck and women who won't "settle." You've screamed this at length to anyone who will listen, usually right before explaining why nothing about it can change. Here's a question nobody in your feed is going to ask you: who's paying their mortgage off your misery? Think about how a dating app actually makes money. Not from you finding someone and leaving. It makes money from you staying on it — swiping, scrolling, almost-matching, checking back tomorrow. A user who finds a partner and deletes the app is a lost customer. The entire design, the whole dopamine architecture of the thing, is built to keep you engaged, not satisfied. Satisfied people log off. Now look at your podcast feed the same way. Every morning you feed forty-five minutes to a guy with a microphone and a jawline and a "no BS truth-telling" thumbnail. He tells you women are hypergamous liars, the deck is stacked, you were born on hard mode, and there's nothing to be done about looks or the "sexual marketplace" except maybe buy his supplement stack or his $2,000 cohort program that will fix it. You nod along. You feel understood. Then the video ends, nothing in your actual life has moved one inch, and tomorrow you'll be back for the next episode. That's not an accident. That's the retention loop. A guy who gets better stops showing up. He works on his social skills, gets a therapist, stops insulting the people he wants to interact with,  builds a life, and — shock — starts dating. He unsubscribes. He's cured, and cured customers don't renew. So the incentive of anybody monetizing your despair points one direction: keep you engaged enough to need tomorrow's episode, never healed enough to close the app for good. Compare that to an actual doctor, who wants you well and gone, whose whole ethical structure is built around making themselves obsolete to you. None of the guys selling you "alpha mindset" seem to want that. The diagnosis never changes. Only the product line does. This is the same principle as the Emotional Bank Account, run backwards — instead of somebody making deposits into your life, they're renting you a story where you're the permanent victim of a rigged system, and charging a subscription to keep hearing it. You're not paying for solutions. You're paying for permission to stay exactly where you are while feeling smart about it. It's a genuinely brilliant business model, credit where due. Feminism is Cancer, the wall, hypergamy, 80/20 — none of it requires you to do anything except watch, agree, and maybe buy the branded protein powder. Compare that to "go to therapy, work on your listening skills, get comfortable being told no sometimes, build an actual personality outside your grievance" — which is boring, slow, occasionally humiliating, and does not have a thumbnail. You already know what outcome you want, presumably. You just haven't asked whether the people supplying your information also want you to have it. Their KPI isn't your happiness. It's your watch time. If you genuinely want a partner — Dominant, submissive, vanilla, whatever — the first, least sexy, most necessary step is auditing who's been telling you it's impossible, and asking honestly whether that person profits from you believing them.

Well I have been asked why my Profile says Dominant. I think most all CD Gurls have both Dom and Sub persoanlities. Sometimes a CD Gurl just needs to be able to stand up for herself and yet other times when feeling very fem, likes to flirt and enjoys being sexually chased. Been many times very frustrated dealing with the Dom personality and has considered to become a Switch and taken by a Slave Master. Again, this poses some special issues. Nobody I know wants to impose a death sentence on themselves but to be taken, broken and retrained for servitude as a slave seems very appealing and might solve issues of needing to be always making the decisions. Being a slave means you most likely become an "IT" as owned property and you no longer get to choose anything. Everything is chosen for it by the Owner/Master that it is bound to. As a CD, Domestic Servitude seems very attractive while flitting to and from it's chores, dressed in something fem and cute and of course Sexual Servitude is without saying, a very real life situation as a slave. CD Gurls do not fear this because most all are Bisexual   and retrained as a Gay Slave is only a slight change. One of the main changes is a sexual slave provides sexual satisfaction to it's Master without expecting any of it's own, except the learning to be satisfied that Master is satisfied. A slave might never experience another orgasm for the rest of it's life as a slave? A slave will need to learn Master's protocols for everything and expect punishments when it does not perform to Master's standards. A Master may want to brand His slave. He may want to have slave pierced in many areas of it's body. Many Gay Masters want the slave to wear a permanent metal collar so can never be removed by slave. They also want slave to be nude, rather than clothed. This would be a hurdle a "former CD gurl" would need to overcome or be constanly thinking of fem clothing and how it felt to be wearing these girlie girl garments and enjoying the fabrics and texture of fabrics and array of colors and prints in fem clothing.   And this most likely would cause it's Master distain and cause Master to punish slave more frequently and harshly with whippings, rather than just spankings. From messaging with slaves and former slaves, it finds out it would need to learn to appreciate punishments from Master and thank Master for his guidance. All of these things are perplexing and need to be considered before taking that "One Step Beyond" into a new life style and forever leaving the past behind. Once it enters Master's Dungeon there is no going back or returning home. Some Masters require male slaves to be castrated to make them more mellow and permanently change them so they are even more, less likely to think of escaping in those beginning months of training and breaking slave down to a blank canvas for it's life of servitude. Simply stated, a Submissive is someone who "chooses" how to give pleasure and enjoy receiving pleasure with a more Dominant person. A Slave has NO choices. A Slave does what Master says and goes where Master takes it.  

Don't give up my first journal. Hi I'm mistress muse and I am dominant to my wolf.  If there is one thing that being on the scene has taught me, it would be to never give up. I spent so long in fruitless vanilla relationships that although, true, filled with love and all the nice things that people claim to experience in these things it also carried with it a weight. It was like a brick in my chest, a wrong feeling, an alone feeling, a dark hopeless feeling, a sinking if you will. Which in a way was true I was drowning I was drowning in self doubt I was drowning in a sea of misunderstandings and depravity. The love I craved seemed so taboo it almost seemed impossible to obtain. I may have been looking in the wrong places but even kinky people I've known for years on the scene would often look baffled if I piped up some of my perversions. I then met someone I had known in a completely vanilla setting... So vanilla in fact even he hadn't really noticed me before... a friend who knew of his kinks thought we would be quite suited. Looking back now I find it amusing that both him and I scoffed at the idea but Kinky curiosity got the better of us. There was this feeling everytime we spoke... A feeling of understanding... A good feeling... A weightless feeling soon combined with a feeling of want. I wanted this man... I was fucking getting him. On the scene for years he has been known as z3ro (zero) but ladies gents and pets let me tell you this he is anything but a zero so from the very beginning I have refused to use this name for him. He became my Wølf, my alpha bitch, my sub, my friend, my mirror and my PARTNER. I have used this term quite freely in the past but with him it's different. He is my partner in crime he is my play partner he is my intellectual chewing gum. He turns my head and the way my brain works. I never thought it was possible to find someone to just get me and be able to match my sadistic evil streak. To find someone on the same interlectual level as me. For me to find someone just as twisted as me. For this I am grateful and this is why my wisdom(me) for the day is this.... JUST DON'T GIVE UP

Today I had a meet and greet with a man who was:   local within my preferred age range available for a publicly acknowledged relationship interested in some of the same significant kinks that I am cuter than his photos   The conversation flowed well. This seems promising.

Christmas '23, and what is it like ? I've mostly healed up. Added 4 yards of topsoil in front of my recently aquired home in Lacey. Planted a lot of bulbs. Mix of native wildflowers. And blueberries, raspberries, strawberries and grapes. My compost heap is better than yours, professionally managed by the songbirds lured there by the cleverly placed feeder. Cleared the path from the back gate to the bike trail. Blackberries are tough in this area, so that is a project to finish later, when I hope to add some cedar trees back there, and a lot of wildflowers. But it's mostly blackberry, now, and vines don't vanish when you cut them, that's just the start of the job. It's good to have a hobby. The neighbors have signed off on the new mailbox thing I want to make. Half whisky barrels, 2x2 cedar arbor, Wisteria or grapevines, undergrass irrigation, and a pair of big mailboxes.  My '80 Triumph convertable made it as far as the garage. Needs a lot of work. Old gasoline and 45 year old rubber, everywhere. It's cute, though, even if it bites my fingers every time I get a tool anywhere near it. 20 year old Ford spent 10 days at the dealer. Alternator, battery, the cable in between. Came back with belt squeek-eek-eek-eek. Which is really annoying because it's the loudest thing on the truck. Wonder if I can fix it. The tool shed has gone all electric, so the gasoline is now 'something I have to get rid of' where before it was an essential hazard to life & property that smells bad. The mower made me do it. It ran about half speed last time, and is too rusty to work on. An important part of the next dump run. And romance? Sadly, no. I blame the pandemic... Perhaps the new year in my new place doing my new thing will bring some relief. Perhaps my new, noticably smaller, trowser collection will help some. But what I really need to do is get out more. So, call me.

March 13th 2023 - football player tells me this was his most powerful orgasm ever I'm going to tell you the ending of the story before I even start the story. In fact the title has already told you the ending. Football player tells me this was the most powerful and extreme orgasm he's ever had in his life. So here is what happened. He came over and as usual showed himself through the garage and came into the house through the garage door. He said, "hello, how have things been" and was being cordial as he stripped naked without me needing to say a word. As usual he already had a hard on. In case you're a new reader, he's not an actual football player, but he has the build of a football player. Big broad shoulders. Beefy thighs. Strong muscular arms. He's got a nice beard and mustache that is always nicely trimmed. The hair on his head is cut short and always looks great. And he shaves all his pubes. He's wonderfully smooth everywhere. Sometimes he drops to his knees, if I tell him to, and sucks my cock. But I'll be honest with my readers, my doctor started me on a new medicine and things aren't working downstairs right now until my body gets used to the new medicine. But that doesn't stop me from having fun, and clearly didn't stop him from having the best orgasm in his life. So we headed straight downstairs and he jumped up into the sling. He's been in the sling enough times he didn't have to ask any questions. He just hopped up and threw his legs in the air so I could attach them to the loops around his ankles. Sometimes I put a blindfold on him, but not today. I wanted him to watch in the mirror above us. And I noticed instantly his eyes were staring into the mirror. He likes the smooth feeling of a rubber glove on my hand as I assault his hole, and I was watching his eyes look into the mirror as I put the gloves on my hands and put lube on my fingers. His hands were holding onto the chains near his head that hold the upper side of the sling in the air. He was gripping The chains rather tight today, this just made his biceps bulge even more. Mmmmmmmmm. As soon as I was gloved and lubricated I instantly started with a finger up his ass. It slid in with absolutely no difficulty. With that one finger I pushed in deep and rotated back and forth then pushed a little deeper and found his prostate and started to play with it. He was still watching in the mirror as he let a moan slip out of his lips. Soon I had two fingers in his ass. Spinning them around. Twisting and shoving. I applied some more lube. I had mixed up some powdered J-lube. I mentioned to him that we were using a new type of lube today. He corrected me and said, "I remember that stuff, it's very slippery." My bad, I don't remember using it with him before but we must have. I quickly worked in four fingers coating my hand and his ass with J-lube. I twisted back and forth. I wanted to get my fist in him today if possible. I was on a mission. I kept working my fingers into his ass, twisting around stretching him more and more. His cock was so fucking hard it was incredible. Read the REST of the story at http://www.SirKel.top

December 9,2023 - Coaches first visit       First visit with "The Coach" today. I'm not sure, but I think the Coach is the closest thing to a completely straight guy that I've had visit me in a quite a while.   I seem to attract the bisexual guys who are dominant in their work but desire to be submissive to another male. And I think that was the case today.   Coach and I messaged on FetLife for a while, determining what he wanted and what his limits were. Then we set up a time for his first visit. It was going to be just after he had coached a game, so I was sure he would have a good mix of testosterone and adrenaline for his first visit.   The time wasn't exact since he didn't know when the game would finish. Around the time expected, he messaged me to let me know he was going to be on his way soon. I kicked back and watched some porn until his arrival.   Being his first visit, I met him in the driveway so he knew he had the correct house. I was wearing my long brown hooded bathrobe. His mind was probably already racing wondering what, if anything, that I was wearing under the housecoat.   We came inside and took a seat and instructed him to strip. As we had previously discussed as he stripped each article of clothing off he folded them neatly by his shoes next to the door.   He had a nice physique and I knew we were going to be having some fun. He was wearing a small cock cage. It appeared he was already straining against it. I remembered that I had instructed him to wear the cock cage during the game. I didn't verify if he has followed directions, or had put it on after the game. I walked over to the couch and grabbed two velcro wrist restraints. I grabbed one of his wrists and extended his arm and attached the velcros cuff. Then the other wrist, as I wrapped the velcro restraint making sure both cuffs were secured around his wrists. Then I retrieved a dog collar from the couch and put it around his neck. This at first, but then I loosened it a notch or two so it was fairly loose. I had plans, and wanted it a bit loose, almost comfortable. But I wanted him to remember, while he was here, he was property. A sub for my use.   Although I had warmed the house a bit, as I wrapped my arms around him from behind him and played with his nipples, I felt him quiver. I'm sure it was a combination of fear and anticipation causing him to quiver, not the temperature of the room.   Normally and make notes when someone leaves, but during today's visit I forgot. So my memory might not be 100% accurate on our activities since I'm writing this story over a week later.   Normally at this point, I sit back in my rocking chair and have they guy suck my cock for a while, but I remember that didn't happen today. And honestly, I don't remember why. Either something we had talked about, or something in my mind cause me to change things and we headed straight upstairs.   When we got up to the bedroom stripped the bathroom off. I was completely naked. I laid back on the bed and told him to come over between my legs and suck my cock. Without hesitation he climbed on the bed and latched on to my cock.   Although one part of me thinks that he is 99% straight, good Lord was he a great cocksucker. It makes me wonder if I'm correct or not. But during the conversations on Fetlife, that was the impression I had. But now that his mouth was on my cock, I was questioning my assumption.   I'm not sure what the hell he was doing with his tongue on my cock but it was incredible. Something about the combination of sucking and swirling and licking at the same time was great. In fact, it was too good. It had been a week or so since I had hooked up with someone and this felt so good, I felt that I could orgasm at any moment. So I told him to lick my balls.   Although I enjoy having a guy lick my balls, in this case the main reason I was having him lick my balls was to prevent me from having an orgasm. How sad would it be for him to arrive and not more than 5 or 10 minutes later have an orgasm and send him on his way.   So he licked at my balls for a while as I raised my right leg putting my knee in the air to give him greater access to my balls and taint. He was good at that also, but not as good as his cock sucking skills. Soon using both of my hands on the sides of his head, I lifted him off my balls and lowered him onto my cock again. The feeling was sensational. I just remembered that I kept murmuring, "oh fuck, oh fuck that feels great."   I grabbed his head and started pushing him deeper onto my cock. He gagged which made me chuckle. I think I growled something like, "oh yeah choke on Daddy's cock."   Part of the time I watched him bob up and down on my cock, part of the time I just threw my own head back enjoying the moment. I looked down and could see his cute bubble butt over his shoulders which only made my cock harder. I was planning to fuck that ass before he left tonight.   I wrapped my right leg over his shoulder onto his back. That just pulled him down onto my cock a bit more. With my hands on the back of his head and my right leg over his back I could force him onto my cock until his chin rubbed my balls. He was choking on my cock, completely under my control, completely submissive, doing exactly what I was telling him to do. I was giving him the fantasy that he was wanting.   I remember being quite verbal that day. Repeatedly calling him… daddy's little cocksucker, calling him… a good little fagot, but at the same time rewarding him by telling him what a good job he was doing sucking cock. Each time he choked I would give him a compliment like, "good Boyyyyyyyy" dragging the work out like I was rewarding a family dog. I watched as his head continued to bob up and down on my cock.   He would deep throat my cock until it was all the way in the back of his throat, then he would pull almost completely off and suck hard on just the head of my cock, swirling his tongue around, poking his tongue in my piss slit, then go back to deepthroating and choking again.   But now I had reached my threshold of my orgasm. If I can keep from orgasming past the first 5 or 10 minutes, I'm usually good for an hour. I'm not quite sure what that is, but once I passed that 10 minute mark I'm good for a while. And at this point, I was past my mark.   I started getting a little more rough with him. I reached down and grab the collar and gave it a bit of a twist, tightening it on his neck. Simultaneously I pulled the collar down, pulling him onto my cock. This did a bit of breath control, or breath restriction, while he continued to suck my cock.   I kept the color twisted until his body language was telling me he was at his limit on breath control. So I released the collar and I just laid back on the bed enjoying whatever in the fuck he was doing with his tongue. Oh my God, it was incredible.   I remember him repositioning himself, I think to get up on his elbows a bit. He slid his hands under my legs almost cupping my butt cheeks whereas before they had been on top of my legs, his forearms almost resting on my chest toward my nipples. Now that his upper arms were under my legs, I took the advantage and raised both of my legs onto his back. I crossed my legs locking them and behind his back squeezed his head between my legs.   With my hands, I forced him deep onto my cock. Then I tightened the squeeze of my legs holding him in place. No longer

  New Year After a brief discussion this morning we have agreed on a few things to try and get the most out of 2023. wearing my daily collar more often (as permitted by job, etc) more butt plugs less underwear more outfits with access when home more use of the belt more opportunities for us to explore with others Happy New Year!

Alright......look... if I get a DM asking me to go to Google chat OR any other chat program BEFORE we get to know each other a LITTLE bit THAT is NOT going to happen. Much like that "take off your clothes" and/or "what  are you wearing"    Yes I want and NEED to find a Master OR Mistress and YES that this web page has been reckoned to Mos eisley spaceport, and I understand people have been hurt from their interactions. However:   *I* know that *I* am worth it, I'm worth the time AND effort that is required to claim me, this isn't going to be easy and IF it was then wouldn't you be more concerned? Perhaps, JUST perhaps the reason people get those type of people that are NOT "real" is because of the DM's that they receive? Take it for what it is...   SO the pictures of me ARE me.....the  text I wite (with spelling errors) ARE mine. i'm asking for you, to look deeper, take a chance to nuture a relationship with me,THAT is what will form a unbreakable bond, NOT "what are you wearing".....   With Love,   hope     

I bring it on myself, I know. I am a perfectionist overachiever and I do too much. Earlier I was taking a break watching tv, and a song came on. I don't even remember the song now, but I burst into tears for a good few minutes for no reason at all. Other than I have created a monster of a deadline that I am spending way too much time working on. No balance. But we knew this.  The other day I had a conversation with someone about pacifiers. Not just the what, but the why, and the stigma and labels, and how none of that matters. I bought two, they're purple. After a run through the dishwasher I tried one out the other day. I don't know that I feel anything, but I also don't know what it is I'm supposed to feel or if it has to be used in conjunction with a particular activity, like coloring. Which I hadn't done in that moment. Or this one. I kind of feel like Maggie Simpson. What I don't feel like is an infant, and I'm glad of that. Guess I'll continue my experiment another day when I can do more things with less stress. I'm still calling this progress in breaking down barriers. Oh, and I bought bubbles. Looking forward to a day when it's not a million degrees outside. 

Another day another experience. the rollercoaster of life as a cd/sissy has we looking and trying pain. one day this week it was ordered (another online relationship started up) to place nipple clamps on and they were left on all day for what like 6 hours. nipples are even nore sore now days later and each hour i have to pull them hard out to keep them sore. i love it!! Then yesterday was ordered to tie my cock and balls up with 2 shoestrings., Having never done that before well not for ages anyway, was rather new. But my once done and they were all secured. one under the gland, the other around balls. well the feeling was intense to say the least.  then all covered with a satin red thong panties, was so sexy. working from home was never so much fun!! that was left on for again 6 hours. once off there were marks all over them yet so intense a feeling. never felt like that before. was so intense a feeling inward more than needy. what next it wonders and hope. should it become a pain slut to someone?!

This is really difficult. And I don't mean being cute or pretty. I'm talking about trying to find somebody. I mean I kind of wanted a female, a woman, but I'm realizing, what would a woman want to do with me? I mean, unless she saw our relationship as some kind of lesbian relationship. But then why invest the time with me? Just get a woman. It isn't like I've been cuckhold now I'm just watching my last relationship have sex with men and we go and get our hair done together. That's a silly dumb fantasy. I don't really expect that ever. So it becomes kind of complicated. Being with a guy, I've been there. It never really works out. Most guys really have no idea. And I don't mean that in a mean way. And yes I've tried, thinking OK I'll be with a guy he can just go be a guy I'll be the girl I'll take care of everything that I need to to be cute and pretty. But oddly enough, it never seems to work out that way. I am submissive and really truly just want to explore more of a relationship as a submissive and feminine. I've done all the hard work myself. I am on estrogen and other feminizing pharmaceuticals. I've actually been surgically castrated, yes, have no balls. But yet I still can't find someone. And yet I still also feel more male than female. Is there really a woman out there that actually enjoys the art of emasculation? And also possibly feminization. I remember a long time ago I was at a bar out here in California, called the Oxwood Inn (I think that was it) and I saw a cute couple. a black woman, clearly the dominant, and a effeminate partner. I started a conversation with her, the dominant, basically asking about their relationship, and if she was together with her. I was quickly explained that yes, they do live together. She was working to turn him into a her in every way. This honestly fascinated me so much so that I still kind of looking for that same relationship. Now I'm sure there are men out there that might be able to do this? I've even gone so far as wondered if possibly I could pay somebody. Make some sort of long-term agreement because I'm sure this isn't gonna happen in a month or three months I would venture to say for complete transition, it's got to be at least a year? But then again what do I know? 

Here is a lil update:  You'd like to turn your ass all sorts of colors, pleasure you, control you,                         restrain you, explore you, use you and care for you.                         You want to fill your holes, devour you, make you cum repeatedly.                         If this is not a normal daily routine or something there in, then  I'm not interested in you being                          My Dom, My Daddy or anything of the sort. Simply not the girl for you. Ty

Adieu Yes, maybe it is true.Yes, maybe it is true that maybe i am blue.maybe i am blue, and maybe it is because of you.You were on the venue.i took the cue, and gave what was due,but you didn't follow through.i was at your pew, face to your shoe,You left me like a whoop-de-doo;You didn't renew,You didn't rescue,my confidence in you has flew, askew.There will be no break-through,no rendezvous,no well-to-do point of view.This is World War Two, thank you,and i wont argue how bitter i stew,or how i feel a devalue inyour discontinued virtue.Because now,i see you now at face value.And now i cling to my own Bellevue -my own worldview -And i shall paint her deep blue,because yes, maybe it is true,maybe it is true that maybe i am blue,and maybe it is because of you, mind you -my dear Safeword, Adieu.~ dirtydarling

I had a conversation with a friend.  He reminded Me how powerfully dominant I am.  Also that most boys cannot handle what I offer.  i asked him who he thought would be right for Me.  I was amazed he captured him purrfectly.  I am looking for someone at least 50 and up, athletic, handsome, intelligent, needs someone like Me.  He will have his life together and can give us a happy life.  All he needs is Me, after all I am a rare find.  My Friends description is below: I dont see you interested in someone thats a wimp You want an Alpha to give himself to you, and do so completely He will only do that with YOU, not anyone elseYou want him to freely hand over his mind, orgasms, and serve your EVERY whimIn public he will simply appear to be the most doting mate on the planet, bit mentally he will be completely enslaved to you. You both love it this way and wouldnt want it any other way

damn got it all wrapped up....this is talking about the imagery and also the real life of us that are dark goddess priestess vibes...those who either have their warrior/men of action dark dudes or who are holding out for theirs to come to them...and then girlies like me who are naga the serpent who ejected themselves from the entire equation.   this talksssss about mature topics of power dynamics, what the issues are on both sides, why opposition both in real life and in media keeps us seperate, what happens when/if one of us comes together..and the wildness of ladies like me who are on the roam by ourselves. sooooo warning placed.haha.   for this deep dive we are going back to the classics of anime. especially a classic that was brought to american back in the 00s.   gundam wing(i could've added gundam 08th ms team for that jungle vibe because the main couple is a similar vibe but i didnt)   and slayers   from there we are going to specifically look at three romantic couples that despite enough evidence or direct source material that shows these couples are romantic based the entire fandom tends to question if they are 'legit' or not.   we are talking about:   1.xellos and filla   2. zelgadis and amelia(this one grinds my gears to the end of time that the fandom continuously rejaspects them and falls for the okie dokie bait and switch that zelgadis deserves to be with the good easy docile girl??? we'll talk about that more..this is literally cannon...it's literally in the original work, this isn't fanfiction???)   3. heero and the queen herself relena    talk about a whole ass power couple of infinite strength and finesse that so much of the fandom just can't handle.   the finale person that is not in a couple that i'll be talking about is the one and only naga the serpent. as a young lady who matured physically very early seeing women with big breasts that were often sexualized, tried  to be shamed for how their body is, their innocent and playful and wild nature being taken advantage of, and their loud boisterous ways...and yet they always stand on top..they were confident, they leaned into the sexuality that naturally forms from a body like that and make it look good for them. they wielded the sexuality that was given to them in a way that the men and women around them couldn't stand. and only the bad bitch pack could handle it...the archetype of naga tended to never have a man..but if they did the man was a wild one that let her be free and didn't try to cage her and was the supportive ground to her wild nature.     OH HO HO.   and you know a bitch practiced that daily as annoying young otakus do and perfected it.    and you know a bitch practiced that daily as annoying young otakus do and perfected it.   now that the scene is set, we are going to discuss a few topics.....how ameila and filla are literally high priestesses and while they are the light, the are fiery spunky and have a dark goddess vibe.....they have a side of them that the love and light people are often shocked, embarrassed, and disgusted by. and naga is the straight up dark goddess.   we have the men zelgadis, heero. and xellos the man of action. the warrior men, the dark brooding dark gods on display. the men in the fuckin trenches who aren't sweet, who aren't tender but are highly emotional and empathetic due to how life has shaped them.   and then we have the whole juxtaposition.   all of these people are not average people..they are cosmic beasts. powerful, agile, stronger, and more competent than the average person in their world. and the men and women tend to be engaging in their flirting, push and pull, dynamic, and attraction in a subversive power play due to the intense immensity of them.   vanilla people cite that heero trying to kill relena is a reason they can't be a couple. every either part time, fantasy, or someone like me who is a innate lifestyler where it's apart of my natural personality knows that when relena looked at heero with that face they were simply flirting and we knew it was over for her. it was the combo of the thrill the intrigue and the emotional oh hey there good lookin. i'd say if anything besides the fact that vanilla people were looking at it in a normal romance context the clunk was that they were so young. give it time for heero to cook and he'll get that devious dangerous flirt more refined.   u/littletwinstarspeace - the power of 3 will set you free? 3 priestesses and 3 warriors get together..or do they? how does their union which can totally be romantic, but often doesn't, transform the world? how does this work out in real life? and what about the dark goddess who ejaspects herself from… u/littletwinstarspeace - the power of 3 will set you free? 3 priestesses and 3 warriors get together..or do they? how does their union which can totally be romantic, but often doesn't, transform the world? how does this work out in real life? and what about the dark goddess who ejaspects herself from… u/littletwinstarspeace - the power of 3 will set you free? 3 priestesses and 3 warriors get together..or do they? how does their union which can totally be romantic, but often doesn't, transform the world? how does this work out in real life? and what about the dark goddess who ejaspects herself from… and well naga being so powerful and without a dude is she realllllllllly running into those dangerous gangs of men where she usually gets some sort of kidnapped or tied up just for shit and giggles?   u/littletwinstarspeace - the power of 3 will set you free? 3 priestesses and 3 warriors get together..or do they? how does their union which can totally be romantic, but often doesn't, transform the world? how does this work out in real life? and what about the dark goddess who ejaspects herself from… so we'll be talking about their relationships as the man on the ground the dark goddess priestess, their power dynamic-y ways....why so many especially traditional people don't see these people as actual romantic husband/wife, boyfriend/girlfriend, lovers, partners, what keeps them separate, why even when they are clearly the pair they tend to be tempted by women who aren't on their level such as lena or distracted by the young lady in kingdom waltz, why it seems in spite of the obvious synergy between these that these men tend to end up with the more docile mismatched woman that they have sexual and fleeting passion for, what the challenge is for the woman, what the challenge is for the man, what happens when these power couples never get together and why in writing and story they do everything in their power including insert some mismatched woman that they usually end up with instead to keep them away, when someone like naga says fuck the system i'm ejecting myself from all this storyline and paving my own way   AND HOW THIS TRANSLATES TO REAL LIFE.   because for some of us bdsm and power dynamics are real.   magic is real.   esotericism is real.   there are real dark goddess vibes, high priestesses, knights, men of action, warriors, and though we don't see it as visual as the media we have our own magic that we wield. and these pairings and the entire thing is a very real real world issue. or situation.   my answer is riding with naga to all this conundrum, peace out and jump off the plane with no safety net or par

For a site supposedly so mindful of bigotry and/or transphobia (to the point that profiles languish in Purgatory to be "approved" for things as simple as updating your age), it really annoys me that in the "Seeking" section of your profile, "Switch Transgender" is not an option. And it's never been an option.  Apparently it's impossible to be a switch if you're trans.  Or, perhaps it's impossible to be trans if you're a switch.  How frustrating.  Paying lip service to these rather important concepts without even doing something as simple as acknowledging people who are switches, but who may not be cis, feels obnoxious, possibly like it's not much more than mere virtue signaling.  Good luck if someone is NB.  No, we certainly don't need more sites overrun with transphobia, but as such, yes, we do need to actually fully embrace all the options that are available to cis people being available to trans people on a site with so few options, anyway.  And maybe even work on updating that for NB people, too.  I'd love for the energy that's put into profile approval (especially when you're just updating things in provided dropdown menus, anyway) to be put into those basic updates in 2022 instead.  I know CS, as a whole, updates slowly (if at all), but that would still be lovely for a site that claims to be mindful of bigotry.  Sometimes bigotry isn't just what you say, sometimes it's also what you don't say.

What a maid should bring to Dragao Verde For your first visit, or if you have nowhere to store anything at home, I can probably lend you anything you have not yet acquired on your first visit, though I cannot guarantee it would be a good fit, flattering, comfortable, etc.! From top to bottom; Unless your hair is long enough to be styled in a credibly feminine style, you will want a wig. A long-hair hairpiece can look great, but will be difficult to keep it in good condition if wearing it daily. So I would recommend something that can be more easily maintained. I can offer one as a loan, but it may not be of good quality, the colour that suits you, or in tip-top condition. If all else fails, I will have you wear a snood cap over your hair and/or wig. I have something suitable. If you have pierced ears, small studs or sleeper-type earrings are fine; big dangly hoops are not. Or you can wear clip-on sleepers. If you want your ears (or anywhere else) pierced, I can probably arrange it. If you normally wear spectacles, try to have a pair in a gender-neutral or a feminine style, or wear contact lenses. (Sometimes when you buy a pair of glasses, they will offer an extra pair free, and you could have those in a suitable style.) If you want to show a bust-line, but don't yet have breasts, then you will want silicone breast inserts. No bigger than C cup, ideally. Definitely no bigger than D cup. It is hard to make bigger sizes look realistic. With a bra, and spare, to hold them in place. A chastity device, that you know you can wear for the whole period without pain or problems. My current recommendation for a chastity device is the custom Cherry Keeper. It is made to measure using 3D printing. You can choose the ring-size, cage-style, diameter, length, colour, and even finish.  See recent photos of Jessica's device in my Fet Life photos and read the captions and comments. I recommend an open-cage design, in white, and the minimum size you can get your flaccid penis into, to eliminate any chance of erections or chafing in the best possible finish. An anal plug, again, that you know you can wear for the whole period without pain or problems. Get one and some lube and try it. If too big, get something smaller, if you think you could wear something larger, get a larger one, and so on. A suspender belt and several pairs of black stockings. These are optional, but most girls like to wear them for evening table service. If one or more of your dresses is a pastel colour, not black, bring some in tan or nude. Black court shoes, modest heel, no more than an inch and a half for day wear. A pair of Crocs, or imitations, in a neutral colour, i.e. grey, white, black would be a less expensive alternative, the back stairs are very hard on shoes! Perhaps a second pair for evenings with a ~3 inch heel, but these are optional.  Maid dresses, ideally 2 or 3 to allow for laundry. Plain pastel colour or black, in cotton or polycotton, white collar and cuffs optional. I can loan you one or two dresses in your size, but it is better to have your own. The ideal would be at least two in grey, blue or burgundy or black. But anything similar would be fine. We look for a shared style, but not total regimentation with identical uniforms. There is an informal code on hemlines, above the knee for slave-maids who give sexual service, below the knee for those who don't, bondmaids. So everyone knows where they stand, or kneels. My rule is that the apron should never go below the hemline, but usually be quite close. Several white aprons, full and waist aprons, plain and fancy, ideally 2 plain in each style to allow for laundry. Again, I can loan these, if needed. If you have a fetish French-maid outfits or costume, whether in conventional fabrics, latex, PVC or whatever, bring that too, as you may be able to wear it doing table service at our kinky dinner parties. Makeup kit. Some practice in private beforehand will help. Wash-bag, toothbrush, paste, flannel, etc. (There may be some shampoo and conditioner available for communal use, e.g. left behind by other visitors.) Perhaps a skimpy, shortie nightie. If you have nowhere discreet to leave a uniform, you may store it in a plastic box in our loft until you use it again, though if it is there unopened for more than a couple of years we'll message you and ask if you are coming back. If not, we'll put it into stock.

Since I have been away for a while, have a writing entry!   There is just something about women’s eyes. The way that you can look down into them and see the arousal. You watch, never losing eye contact, your breath mingling with one another. You watch her eyes squint and then light up when your skin touches hers, the space between your bodies getting smaller. The way the hue hazes over with eagerness and need. The underlining knowledge that she craves it, the roughness, the love, the caring about her, just someone being obsessed with her, even if for those next moments spent together. The furrow in between her pretty eyes when she’s trying to concentrate on listening, the deeper furrow when she’s angry for not being allowed a release, the begging and pleading in the corners of such a beautiful color. A tornado of frustration in the depths of the pupil that send fire to her iris when she’s pinned against the surface below her, the teasing ensues. Her words match the storm you’re staring into, wanting all of the earth shattering pleasure those pretty eyes are about to give you. As her pretty mouth fixes for another vulgar attitude, you see the fireworks on the brim of exploding behind that tornado, her head falling back, eyes squeezed tight, urging the leg shivering to take over her body. Your fingers dance along her body, your mouth cascades her skin as those pretty eyes of hers start to well with the happiest of tears. Picking her head up, you let the sea of waves in her happiness wash over you, never losing eye contact as you use your tongue to clean your mess of a woman with such beautiful eyes.

Life can be very funny. Some conversations start with uncertainty but over time blossom into connections you treasure, while others can feel very good at the start but then feel as if something is off. I have been talking with a couple for some time. They were primarily a cuckold couple, with a development path of increasingly rough, forceful sex, but they had had one encounter with a professional Dominant sometime back, when she was flogged and evidently reached subspace without knowing what actually happened. Let's just say they understand the psychology and physiology much better now that we have been talking. Lately, there have been emerging signs that "he" is a sadist. "She" thinks she is a masochist because she has a high pain threshold, but she isn't. She is a hedonist who loves her husband. Turns out all they wanted was someone, me(?), to turn up and flog her arse mercilessly, driving her to sobbing hysteria on her way to subspace (hopefully). He wants her tears, crying inconsolably as she is beaten. I am not judging - each to his own - but it became clear that what they want is not who I am - not even who I might be. So today I told them. I was met with an "OK. Thank you. Goodbye." and was then immediately cut off from contact. They shared the account (I think) - of course, it could all be a sham - but I think it was "him" who did the terminating. Sometimes right is right and wrong is simply wrong. I do feel better knowing I stayed true to me, but I do wonder where they go next. Back to that Dom in Spain?

After talking with someone on here recently I've done a lot of thinking about my desire to submit and be bound. I had never really thought about how long I've felt that way or why. Looking back on my teen years I think I've always had a fascination with restraint. My first sexual dream revolved around me getting "caught" and bound up. Looking back I have a few memories where even when I was younger there was something about being restrained that appealed to me. Now, as an adult, I think my feelings now are rooted in my desire to be helpless. I'm fortunate enough to have had a safe life, and I've never been in a bad scenario where I was in significant danger, and I suspect that may have something to do with it. Regardless, I think my root desire is to be helpless, forced to trust another person and do what they say. Something about giving into that power and giving up total control is what I really want. i don't know fully, just been thinking about it recently and these are my first thoughts. Thanks everyone for teaching me more and helping me explore these feelings!

Hello to all of you who actually take the time to read my profile. Please, IF you contact me, don't just send me a one liner; I will not respond. Send me a real introduction to you as a person, not just you as a sub. ! I will not try to vet you through this site. Please be prepared to text! I have signal and telegram. Also, be prepared to send me real world pictures, you gardening, you going on a walk, etc. , be prepared to voice verify and video chat verify within a few days. You must also be prepared to travel to Parkersburg WV for a public, vanilla, in person first meeting.  I will discuss fetishes, interests, desires before we meet because this is a sex based relationship; however, I will NOT dominant, sext, role play, cam or DO anything sexual to you virtually until AFTER we have met in person and you become my sub! You ask, you will be blocked! If you want pics, go to my fetlife. I have over 120 posted and I post new pics regularly. A real sub will not hesitate to follow my requests and tbh, I'm not interested in you if you're not prepared to show me you in fact are real, committed and will show up, day after day, and not just when you're horny.

When covid came about, i/we did everything we could to protect ourselves.   To this day we continue to do everything we can to protect ourselves.   My 1st bout with covid was due to my boss not having any sense   Running a fever stay away from people, he came to my desk.   I have had both vaccines and the booster.   Had i not taken another covid test would not have known i was positive.   Moral of the story:   Just because you are vaccinated you can still catch. I did not have any symptoms yet i was positive and could pass the virus to someone else.   Stay safe / stay healthy   i don't know about you; however, i am over it.

Nothing can be gained without losing.Even heaven demands death.One day, someone is going to walk into your lifeand make you realize exactly why itnever worked out with anyone else.It'll be ovious in the way he shows up,chooses you, prot ects you, and guides you.

How can a str8 male fall in love with his Bull? This is a question that always calls my attention but lately it has become a surprising reality. For a Bull to pursue and obliterate any idea of str8 identity on a self proclaimed heterosexual male is a la or or of love. The Bull knows that this identity is misplaced but to convince the other male of this requires a deep knowledge of the male psyque.  Our society has done much of the work for us, str8 males (I said it before) admire sports figures to the edge of homoerotism. But of course that's admiration and it stops there. These males will follow a strong male to hell and back and allow any sort of intimacy with the leader of the band, actually they crave it. When they finally come to me I know there's a need a need that eventually could turn into love and that is a great feeling. However if one finds a male that is slowly falling in love not only giving you ownership of their bodies but also their feelings; that's a sacred charter that cannot be underestimated. Why? Because that male is into you and your dealings with him you are a model they can submit and surrender to. In short,  you've found a male bride and you must nurture that male and his feelings.  For the str8 male to acknowledge such feelings is confusing because is attraction, lust, respect, and the acknowledgement that he has fallen in love with the man and his phallus; but most of all the character and security it brings to his life. He is now realizing that the best place to be is anywhere his Man places him: between his legs, under him, or on his back awaiting the entry of the phallus that will change his life forever.  As a Bull you know he is yours  anyway you want that however, to the outside only him will feel your power and control. Even if he goes back to women which is an option if they still want to claim his str8 persona, he will mount them imitating you and doing it for you.    I had the pleasure of a baby named after me, and that’s the ultimate surender. It is his baby, now a teen, but every time he calls him he calls me. A male who loves you is a treasure to be had and a partner to nurture and possess beyond the physical.

I've been single for a long time and have been online here {and a few other sites} off an on over the years.  Always open to making frineds though if online only it can be hard to be active as life is busy. I would really like to explore submission to a Dom, Daddy, Master and local is best because it provides the opportunities to enjoy frequent time together and time for play.  Because my sexuality is intertwined with my spirit and soul, I cannot have just a physical relationship without first working on trust, admiration, enjoyment of the other person outside the bedroom also. Have been actrive in the local kink community in the past and would enjoy that again! PS I do have an exhibitionistic side and so attention is very much appreciated by this BBW!

Waitress the Musical is in theaters for a few days, in case you were not aware. I saw it twice. I have been listening to the soundtrack for quite some time so while I'm familiar with the music and the story, it was nice to put it all together. It gave it more meaning, and definitely endeared several songs and characters that I had quickly dismissed prior. I highly recommend it if you have time tomorrow. Last day.  There is this one character, Dawn. She works at the diner and is quite quirky and loveable. She has a song that is entertaining, and in my opinion, extremely heartbreaking. There are two lines that hit me: What if when he sees me, what if he doesn't like it? What if he runs the other way and I can't hide from it? What happens then?What if when he knows me, he's only disappointed? What if I give myself away only to get it given back? I couldn't live with that. I feel that so much. That feeling of not being sure, thinking I'm not enough. That I'm not worth the effort. It's something that resurfaces in rocky relationship times. And sometimes for no reason at all. To drown it out I need to be loved out loud. Consistently. To quote another song, this one sung by Dawn's also quirky beau: I love you like a table. Cover me in stuff and I will hold it up, strong and stable. I love you like a table.  I'm a lot of work. I know this. I also know that somebody out there won't mind. 

Him: I want to have a 1950s style relationship with you! Me: Then why did you contact me?  Him: I just said. I want to have a 1950s style relationship with you. Me: But you are white. Him: Is that a problem? Me: In the 1950s, it would have been illegal for us to have a relationship.  Him: So? Me: So, a 1950s style relationship between us would involve us not having a relationship. Him: Some people did it, didn't they? Me: Illegally, involving scandal and and the likelihood of violence and likely damage to at least one partner's class status. Him: It could not have been all that bad. Me: Loving vs. Virgina happened one year before I was born. Lynchings are still not unheard of. Him: . . .  Me: Toodles!

Ladies...You are welcome and encouraged to apply if you are honest and can obey.  This is a real home and a safe harbor.   I am not personally interested in women sexually, however I am not entirely adverse to the idea of shared intimacy with time.  Mainly, women have entirely unique qualities they bring to a home and to service which I can and do appreciate.  I respond well to women who are straightforward and even a bit tomboyish. On another note.... Some of you gents are real doozies.  The up side is that this has made way for some amazing men to move front and center.  You know who you are - you delight Me and inspire Me and your supportive nature and devotion make all the difference to Me and inturn to Mum.  Thank you. Further.... I see a foot slave...toilet slave...a humiliation slave, lets get real for a moment.  While I appreciate you all have your specialties and preferences, I have to wonder where are all the administrative slaves, the bookkeeping slaves, and refinishing slaves? lol  I'm looking for My own personal TEAM!  Trust in Me when I say, you will be a creative lot and busy busy bees!    

Minoan culture was nothing if not discerning when it came to training slaves. Whereas most societies historically associated with the trade usually treated slaves as mere goods and chattels, Minoa was very different. Examining Minoan art reveal a repeated them when it came to female slaves, often depicting growth and improvement, education and status in the products of their schools.  The difference came from the skill and application Minoan schools showed in selecting candidates, with each school looking for specific traits within candidates. Schools would frequently trade amongst themselves, exchanging girls discovered through each schools specific sources and resources that, whilst not suitable for the discoverer, could be a prime candidate for another. As far as can be told, such trading was done on the basis of benefiting the wealth and influence of Minoa itself rather than an individual school.  Girls would be evaluated purely on their merits, with every attribute considered, evaluated and set against the specialisations of individual schools. It was not unkown for some, older candidates to become assistants to educators at a given school and even to become educators themselves. A girl trained in a Miinoan school to train others to Minoan standards was much sought after. Nowadays, slavery os often associated with either sex or labor, and whilst those were aspaspects of Minoan doctrine, there were many other beside, and each identified trait need a specific plan to bring it to full fruition. Let's look at grace, for example. Grace is usually defined as elegance or refinement, usually of movement. Those considered graceful move with confidence that comes across as fluid and unforced. Grace can also be defined as a behaviour, such as how someone graceful may treat those lower in social status than themselves. Physical grace was a much coveted attribute within Minoan schools because it could become foundational to other skills, such as dancing or fighting. Grace as a behaviour, likewise, was much in demand because it offered pathways into reading a room, keys to seduction or a skill in mediation.  Once identified, a talent like grace then had to be assessed. Was this kind of grace natural or an affectation?  If a natural, latent talent how malleable was it or was it a focused aspect of the girl? For instance, was her grace in movement scalable, as in was she as graceful in the small movements as the large? If not, could she be trained to be? How far could the girls natural gracefulness be pushed, and when did it break down? Was the girl as confident and comfortable in high footwear as with low? Could she move with the same elegance if she were carrying something? How could tight and restrictive clothing affect her? What about on uncertain ground? If balance was lost, how quickly and completely could the girl regain it? If an affectation, how much control did the girl have over it? How well could she shape her gracefulness to a given situation? Could she read the room, tell what was needed and provide it? Could she draw the eye of a crowd or was she better 1 to 1? Could she moderate her gracefulness so as not to show up those of higher status? Could she move according to a role she had to play, as physically convincing as a courtesan as she was a harlot as she was a prized mistress? Did she compliment those she was beside, able to elevate them with the attention of others and not cast them in shade next to her?  Now consider other talents, natural or learned. Languages, sexual proficiency, diplomacy, seduction, fighting both defensively and offensively, offering comfort and counsel, surrogacy, teacher, wet nurse, inamorata... on and on the list goes and, for century after century, on and on went the Minoan schools and higher and higher went their prestige and status and wealth. Until next time.   Questions?

  I need you to innocently move in close while I am talking to you -- your touch on my hip like it belongs there. Drift your fingers under the fabric, lean in and murmur "I'm still listening." Make my voice falter, my words scramble, my mind tangle, and deliberately distract me. Then, casually, make me answer your soft questions, like nothing is being done to me. But increase the pressure. Make my mind melt. Make my thoughts b lur. Make me forget the point in all of this.Make it so that speaking my mind becomes hard, and that giving you my body becomes the preferred expression of my opinions.

Today, I’m open to something a bit more direct. A few of you may have the opportunity to speak with me on the phone. Understand this clearly, this is not casual conversation, and it’s not open access. If you approach, you do so with intention. The rules: You request—never assume.You ask for the opportunity. You don’t demand it, hint at it, or try to casually slide into it. You introduce yourself properly.Name, location, and what you’re seeking clearly and without filler. You respect my time.Be available, be prepared, and be concise. I’m not here for rambling or nervous energy. You maintain composure.No over-talking. No interrupting. You listen as much as you speak. You understand this is a privilege, not a right.Not everyone will be chosen. Most won’t. This is about presence. How you approach me before the call tells me everything I need to know about how you’ll carry yourself during it. Choose your words carefully. — Mistress Nikki Vixen

The Lesson in the Red Chair (part one) T.L. Duncan He showed up trembling. Not from fear—at least, not the kind he admitted—but from the anticipation he’d been drowning in for weeks. Every message he sent dripped with eagerness, with that hungry little please he tried to hide behind politeness. I opened the door before he had a chance to knock twice. “Inside,” I told him. He obeyed instantly, the good ones always do. My living room was dim, lit only by the soft glow of the salt lamp and the single, deliberate spotlight shining down on the red leather chair in the center of the room. That chair wasn’t decorative. That chair was ritual. “Shoes off.” He complied. “Phone on the table.” Another instant reaction. Good. His training hadn’t even begun and he already understood offering control. I circled him slowly, letting silence do the work. The air between us tightened when I brushed a strand of hair behind his ear—not to comfort him, but to claim space. His breath hitched, and that was when I knew: he’d fall beautifully. I stopped in front of him. “You said you wanted structure,” I said. “Discipline. To feel owned for one hour.” His gaze dropped to the floor. “Yes, Ma’am.” “Look at me.” He obeyed again, the word Ma’am still warm in the air. I placed a finger under his chin. “Then you’ll start by kneeling.” He sank to the floor so fast I almost laughed. Not cruelly—just with the quiet satisfaction of someone who has seen this dance a thousand times and still enjoys every second. “Knees apart. Hands behind your back. Shoulders straight.” He adjusted three times before he got it right. Nervous boys forget how their bodies work when they’re desperate. I walked behind him, lifted his hair, and inspected the vulnerable line of his neck. “So sensitive,” I murmured. “If I pressed my thumb here, you’d melt.” He swallowed hard. I didn’t touch him yet. Not physically. Instead, I moved to the red chair, sat down, and crossed my legs with deliberate slowness. “Crawl.” He hesitated, only for a breath. Then he placed his palms on the floor and moved toward me like he’d been waiting his whole life to be commanded that way. His breath shook with every inch he traveled. When he reached the foot of the chair, he stopped and waited. “Good,” I said, letting the approval slide over him like warm oil. “Now put your head on my knee.” He rested his cheek against my thigh as if it were a pillow he’d spent years searching for. His exhale was a confession. I stroked his hair once—reward, not affection. “You crave rules because the world expaspects you to be strong,” I said softly. “But here, strength is mine. Obedience is yours.” “Yes, Ma’am…” “And you take direction beautifully. That’s why I chose you for tonight.” His whole body trembled. I slipped my fingers into his hair and pulled his head back—not harsh, not gentle, but precise. His lips parted, surprise and need blending into something addictive. “There are three things you’re going to learn,” I told him. “One: listen when I speak. Two: obey the first time. Three…” I leaned in, my breath barely brushing his ear. “Never make me repeat myself unless you want consequences.” A shiver shot through him so sharp it might as well have been an orgasm. I smiled. “Now,” I said, loosening my hand but not releasing him. “Your lesson begins.” His head was still in my lap when I slid my hand from his hair to the back of his neck. He froze. Not from fear—no, he was far past that—but from the realization that he had no idea what would happen next. Good. Uncertainty is the first tool of sensory play. “Hands flat on your thighs,” I instructed. His palms landed instantly, but I tapped one with a single finger. “Softer. You’re not bracing for impact. You’re waiting for permission.” He corrected himself. Obedient. Attentive. Hungry. I reached to the side table, slowly enough that he heard my bracelets shift but not fast enough to interpret the sound. His breathing changed—shorter, quicker—as his imagination sprinted ahead of me. Let it. The first thing I picked up was the silk scarf. Not to blindfold him. Not yet. I simply let the fabric glide across his forearm. He inhaled sharply. “Too sensitive?” I teased. “No, Ma’am. Just… unexpected.” “Good. That’s the point.” I drew the silk back, then traced the same path with my fingertip—cooler, firmer, more precise. His skin twitched under the contrast. “Tell me what you feel,” I said. “Soft… then colder. Like my body’s trying to guess you before you touch me.” “Your body doesn’t get to guess. It gets to react.” He shivered, a subtle ripple that traveled from shoulder to knee. I reached again—this time to the small wooden wand, smooth on one end, textured on the other. I let him hear it roll across my palm. His breath caught; he recognized the sound but couldn’t place it. Perfect. I touched his wrist with the cool, rounded end. He sucked in a breath. Then I flipped it and dragged the textured side down the same line. He gasped—quiet, but the kind of sound a man makes when his brain can’t decide between pleasure and restraint. “Overwhelming?” I asked, lifting his chin with the wand. “Yes, Ma’am…” “Too much?” “No, Ma’am. More.” “Then you’ll stay still for it.” He nodded, and I rewarded him by letting the wand trail up his inner arm—slow, deliberate, circling closer to the bend of his elbow. He swallowed. He always swallowed when he was fighting the urge to

OK, so here's the second installment of my new profile: Still here? Still interested? Now on to the kink stuff...## ***Kink information***### **Things that i know about myself that i want more of in my life****my rubber self**I enjoy wearing layers of loose fitting full enclosure rubber, with a hood, gloves, gasmask, and socks. If you are dressed in any amount of rubber, that would be great. I'm happy to be with people wearing all kinds of clothing and gear, or nothing at all. I will be in full enclosure rubber myself.**My submissive self:**i am looking to become a rubber gimp or drone slave, i.e. used like a slave and stored like a gimp. i want to try out & test myself & to see if i do want to be a gimp slave in reality as compared to fantasy. i have lots of solo experience, but very little in-person real-life experience, so a lot of what i want to do is not informed my real-world experience.As your rubber gimp slave i want to to provide protected and safe sexual service to my dominant person while in layers of full enclosure rubber, gagged, blindfolded, leashed, cuffed, plugged and entubed & also some or all of the following: bondage, behaviour control, breath control, piss play, cart & dressage pony play, being controlled, financial domination & doing housework.my attitude is that bondage is about training and getting used to wearing rubber gear on a longterm basis, and so i am seeking to serve you by being forced into and kept in rubber gear, and learning to safely overcome the challenges that come with that. However more importantly, the full rubber gear is a means to an end where i can much better service You.i want to make Your life easier. i will pull my own weight by working in Your home or outside it while in rubber to earn income for the household. i am not no-limits rubber slave.---**As an equal:** I am into long sessions of mutual cuddling, kissing, body stroking in layers of heavy rubber. I am really interested to try living as rubber drones in a hive with contracts and rules that govern the behaviour of the hive and its members, such as these concepts and contracts by [Unit03](https://fetlife.com/users/8849164): - [The concept of a rubber hive: an introduction](https://fetlife.com/users/8849164/posts/6373426)- [Rubber Hive Contracts (or other kink between equals)](https://fetlife.com/users/8849164/posts/6412980)- [Model Short-Term Hive Contract](https://fetlife.com/users/8849164/posts/6413413)## **Limits**Explicit and enthusiastic consent is the sexiest thing. Don't fucking touch me without asking, even (especially!) if I'm in full rubber, naked or wearing something skimpy. Ask nicely and you might be surprised.My limits:-     no blood-     no needles-     no intentionally broken skin-     no scat-     no vomit-     no tickling-     no rimming (giving)-     no marks visible to the vanilla world-     no permanent marks-     no blows to the head-     no sudden neck/head movements-     no sudden loud noises-     no oral, vaginal or anal sex without a condom.## **Safer sex**Asking for (or assuming!) unprotected sex when we are new or casual play partners is a red flag.### **Things that i don't know about myself, and i want to explore to see if i want more in my life**i knew from an early age that i was into rubber. However, there are some bdsm activities that aren't easily compatible with rubber, and so i have never explored them. In 2023, i am realising that i want to try these to see if i also like them, and that if i want to try them, that i have to take off my rubber skin (which is a bit scary). This is what i'd like to try:- sensation play- impact play (whips, floggers, paddles, spanking)- rope bondage- wax play- high protocol- oral and vaginal sex with people of all genders

It's time for me to stand up and fight.  I changed my profile picture because I needed to, I had to.  As more time goes on, the more I see, the more our possible future scares me. This upcoming election, and heck up to next Jan 20th possibly, will possibly go down as one of the more important times in US history. And it scares me to the point that I'm being more political than ever before, to spread awareness, to educate.For myself, I've ALWAYS been independant.  I've always voted 3rd party.  I hate the 2 party system.  Every year I could.   Up to 2020, the first year I voted anything else. And again this year. In the future, when the threat has passed, I'll go back to it, but now is the time to stand up and fight.I'm a submissive/slave, and I'm not a passive one waiting for someone to provide orders.  But being a slave is my choice.  My freedom.  And I believe 100% in the freedom that everyone should have, to decide for them what is best for themselves.I believe in Science.  That experts in their fields know better than politicians, or really anyone else.I believe in equality.  It doesn't matter who you are, what you like, or what you do, we should all be equal.I believe in education. and in line with that:I believe in critical thinking. Children - everyone should learn, and should be able to learn, everything they can or want. And even more importantly they should learn that questions, and questioning is ok, to not believe everything that they read or hear and to actually use their brain to think for themselves.I believe in Books.  In line with education, nothing should be banned.I believe in morality. Both teaching it but also living it. Don't do as you are told, instead think for yourself and do as you feel is right. I believe religion is the most toxic thing that has ever been introduced to humanity, but:I also believe that people are and should be free to worship whoatever, whomever, and however they wish, with:I also believe that religion, thoughts, views, and desires should not be thrust upon anyone, as everyone should be free to make their own decisions, and shouldn't be pressured or manipulated into anything.With the above and more...   I believe that Donald Trump will destroy the US if elected again.I believe that project 2025 is real and that Trump is a part of it.I believe that many republicians are not bad people, in the end, but they believe the fake news, the lies, the fear-mongering and the manipulation they are being told, and do not have the skills, or experience, or education to use critical thinking to see through it all. I believe that I must help fight the hate, the lies, and stand up for what is right.I will speak with anyone about anything, if you wish to have a conversation, I'm open, however if you plan on voting for Donald Trump, it is a hard limit and expect nothing more than conversation.I will not be overly political here aside from this journal and the image, but sometimes a very little is all that is needed.I may or may not post other journals, but as of now I neither plan nor intend to, but as I said above, I'm going to stand up and speak for all, so that doesn't mean I won't.

Oh, George… bless your heart for writing me a whole novel about how you want to “look into a sadistic woman’s eyes” while she perverts you into anal bliss. Truly poetic. But here’s the problem: you’re out here asking for a woman to host you for a month like you’re some kind of kinky exchange student, and all you’re offering is sexual gratification—as if women are sitting around saying, “You know what I need? A strange out-of-towner living in my house for 30 days to eat my food, hog my bathroom, and tell me how multicultural he is in between begging to be pegged.”   You spent time in multinational corporations? Cute. I’m sure your old coworkers will be thrilled to know you’re now out here writing essays about “soft sensual erotic rape play” and “verification photos” like you’re running a BDSM HR department. And let’s be honest—if the highlight of your pitch is “I’m not into pro dommes, but please abuse me sexually,” you might need to realize… sir, you are basically asking for free labor with room and board included.   It’s giving: “Hi, I’m George, I bring nothing but my dick, my mouth, and a suitcase of sci-fi DVDs. Please ruin me, host me, and feed me while I explore my journey.” My love, women are not Airbnbs for your perversion vacations. You wanting someone to host you for a month and offering nothing but orgasms is like me telling Amazon Prime, “I’ll pay for my package with good vibes and a smile.”   So, George, no—no sadistic woman is out here waiting for a floundering consultant to move into her house for a month-long pegging intensive. But I truly hope you find someone on Collarspace who’s willing to take on your… dissertation of desires. Godspeed.

I sure miss the old Collarme site.. It has been a mess ever since and now with this new design layout it has stumbled downhill a few more steps!  The worst change is that it doesn't say when the last time someone was on here so I feel I'm wasting my time by writing to anyone.  Also most of these photos of me are old and before I even began transitioning. I've tried replacing them with new ones but that has got screwed up every single time and I just gave up.  I will gladly send you some recent pictures when I answer your message.  I also don't respond to single phrase one line messages. Please try and show some genuine interest and make me want to right back. Compliments are always nice but that doesn't guarantee a response from me, I am a very busy person so please understand that if I don't answer you right away.  I am primarily looking for a dominant male and I'm most attracted to larger tall mature men. I prefer men close to my age and at least 6 feet tall. I am looking for a TPE M/s or a 50s style household with me as Your submissive wife. I identify as a submissive and could possibly move to full on slave with the right Dominant man.  -Toni 

This is not a kink message but a human, normal message. Majority of us who put work first and mental health last, I appreciate now being told off and told you need to look after yourself or your can't look after others. I can literally feel the headache like someone is poking their fingers into my brain for fun. It is raining in London and I am taking a couple of days off but the rain is doing me some good, telling me slow down, rest, grill some sausages, pour some wine, enjoy your plants that are thriving, read a book and slow down. Forget wear and tear or getting older (in my 30s so not that bothered) but I can feel the life effort reaching overload. I love helping others but might be time to consider a sabbatical.    

what about kinks?   a lot of people are only spécialised in only one thing, or just have interest on 3 or 4 things at most.   im spécialised only on sadism, but, what is sadism?  sadism can take a lot of form, and to understand what a person love and why, you need to understand what gave him interrest in this. for myself, i like sadism because i have fascination about it, im litterraly in urge to find a new trick to gave pain, i have a huge curiosity about a lot of thing, and im very creative, this define my sadism.   why i have fascination about it? take an exemple,  totally out of this. when you see an abandoned build, you can see the plants growing, maybe how much time its on this state, the building certainatly was beautiful before but now declining. a person is the same, when she/he came first the state is good, and i will work to change it, to corrupt/deprave it into another state. the difference is a person turn into the first state again, and again, given you the possibility to do it differently, finding another way, maybe better, maybe even if you didnt thought about before. that's my way of sadism. but yes i concede, i like to hear scream, sound of pain too. like i said before my fascination about this include the visual and the touch, when i finish my session i like to see all the changes, and touch it, swelling, bruises, sensing the heat of the body. and when they come again, i know again this time will be different...

I have always said I do not want a 24/7 kink relationship.  I fear that I will lose me. The me that I took so long to understand and love.  But I was recently communicating with a Master who was looking for just such a relationship.  My initial thought was I don't want that and we discussed it and that prompted me to do alot more thinking on the matter. I am already seeking someone who can take charge and lead. Someone who can help silence my racing thoughts and set my mind free. Someone who will treat me like the special person I am and bring out my full submission and dedication.  Now I wonder if I am letting my fear hold me back. That is typical for me, to be honest.  Maybe 24/7 is what I need. Maybe I just don't understand my needs.  I wonder if meeting the right person would mean there will be no more questions. Maybe with the right one there would be no question about my full and freely given submission. No more worry about losing a part of myself.  Maybe........ XOXOXO

February 20, 2024 I've been speaking with Edgingfun23 for a while on FetLife. He came over for his first visit recently. He told me he was interested in getting a deep enema, and I explained that a deep enema takes time and it might not be necessary. So when he first arrived, as I do with all my guys, I met him in the driveway and we came inside. He was dressed straight from work. Usually guys that come for a visit wear jeans and a t-shirt, very relaxed looking. But edgingfun23 had clearly just come from a day of work. I sat back in my easy chair, looked straight into his eyes and simply said, "well… Strip!" I could tell that he was a bit nervous, but he started stripping his clothing off and putting them in the chair next to where he was standing. I just watched intently as he took off each article of business clothing. When he was naked, I just stared at him for a minute and he stood there wondering what would come next. I got up from my chair and went to the couch and grabbed a pair of wrist restraints. His hands were hanging down to his sides, and not recognizing these were wrist restraints, he did not extend his hands. So I grabbed a hand and pulled it out in front of him, putting the velcro restraint on his wrist. And then I put a restraint on the other wrist. Back to the couch I got a dog collar and put around his neck. I stood behind him and reached around playing with his nipples, groping his cock and balls, and tugging a bit on the dog collar. I told him to come to the bathroom where we were going to clean him out. I briefly explain the difference between a deep enema and a light enema. I told him we would start with a light enema but he would have to tell me when the water he was expelling into the toilet was clear. If it cleared up after a few cycles we would be done, if it didn't we might have to switch to a deeper enema. Apparently never having an enema before, he wasn't sure what to do. I told him to get down on all fours on the bathroom floor. When he was in the doggie position I smeared some Vaseline on my finger and slid it up and down the crack of his ass. I filled a small enema bulb with warm water, put some Vaseline on the tip of the tube, and using two of my fingers spread his ass cheeks so I could insert the tip of the enema bulb into his ass. As I squeezed all the water into his ass he didn't make a sound. I told him to stay in that position as I filled the bulb a second time, inserted it and added more water to his bowels. I smacked his ass and told him that I would leave the room to give him some privacy, and that he should take his time and expel the water. When he was done, he was to flush the toilet and as I heard him flush the toilet I would know it was time to come back in for the next round. I left the bathroom and closed the door behind me. It wasn't too long until I heard the toilet flush. I went back in and he was standing as I filled the enema bulb again. I told him to get back down on all fours. Two more bulbs of warm water filled his bowels before I left him to expel again. He learned quickly because the next time I came in the bathroom he was already on all fours. I think we went through four cycles of rinsing him out when I asked him how the water was. He said it was pretty clear. I think we went through one more cycle. I forgot to tell him on the last cycle to make sure he gets as much water out as possible. When we were done in the bathroom I told him we were going to head upstairs. He had previously told me he might need to work on his cock sucking skills so I thought the best place to do that would be upstairs. Although I knew he was extremely interested in the cow milking machine and the fuck bench, I needed my cock sucked first, so we were starting upstairs. We got upstairs and I briefly showed him all of the toys that I keep in the bedroom. Cock cages, ball weights, paddles and whips, and plenty of anal toys. I passed him a tight fitting cloth hood that has eye holes and a mouth hole. I told him to put it on. At first, as he pulled it over his head, I don't think he realized there were eye holes. I told him to pull it a bit forward that there were eye holes and we wanted to center the mouth hole so my cock had access to his mouth. After he made the adjustment to the hood I told him to climb on the bed on all fours. I wanted to check out his ass. I wanted to start playing with his hole immediately. Instinctively his ass rose into the air as his shoulders went down onto the bed. I think he has been in this position before. I grabbed some lube and squirted it on my finger as I rubbed it across his hole. I slipped my finger back and forth over his ass and then pushed a finger inside. Oh my god, it went in easily. I knew his ass was going to get a lot of play today. This was going to be fun. READ THE REST OF THE STORY AT   WWW.SirKel.top

Boy Speak Boy speak is what he really means when he says one thing but means another, Thinking that he is talking to his mind-reading  mother! But I think I want to say you are a prude, Means he wants his ass fucked and will be rude, Why not Goddess do that for me, Means be my dispensing unit I can see. Go on I will do the kink you want, Means no he won't it's just a taunt. Sure I want to meet but tell me now, How you'll have me cum but I won't bow. Nor will I meet or be respectful at your feet,  Says he. So a kinky twat bottom he will remain you see.     My answer is: No fetish service the dommes4U was never set, Never made active I see you lament. Lament at your loss for a second at a time, When I moved on relieved you won't be Mine.   A Dominant Woman am I to be taken on meals and fun days out, To laugh together while you Mine will happily move about, Being useful funny and sweet. That's is the real-time Slave I want at My feet.   What's that you can't cope if I am Poly, As you want a porn image Mistress-dolly. Silly boy with that boyspeak of yours pouring out, I moved on more men worth my time to chat about.

COCKSUCKERS PLEDGEby Jeremy C. Turnbull - As a Cocksucker, I realize that my place is at the feet of my Feeder; that my sexual fulfillment depends on the pleasure I give my Feeder, and his generosity allows me to gain nourishment from him. - As a Cocksucker, I realize that my only real sexual organs are my mouth, tongue, and throat; that my only need is to pleasure my Feeder. When I am at my true place between his legs, I have no need other than this.- As a Cocksucker, I solemnly vow, without hesitation or regret, to possess a willing mouth; to know I belong on my knees in the presence of a true Feeder; to accept my Feeder’s milk, his nourishment, his cum, in any manner my Feeder requires; to give my Feeder my best, because this is what he deserves for allowing me to nourish myself. - Furthermore, I vow to maintain such focus on his cock and his pleasure that it becomes the center of my universe; to suck, swallow, gag, stroke and choke when he expaspects it from me; to learn when he needs me to suck, swallow, gag, stroke, and choke without having him to tell me. - By this solemn pledge, I accept my place in the world; I love and embrace being a Cocksucker, as this is the only way I can perform to my Feeder’s satisfaction. I swear to make my Feeder moan. I accept that my Feeder is allowed to say whatever he wants or call me whatever he wants while I am pleasuring him. - I agree to show my addiction and need for my Feeder’s cock and cum by begging for it if need be, because a Cocksucker has no pride, he is a slave. I agree, obviously, to make my mouth a willing and anxious hole for my Feeder’s nourishing seed. And to be ready for my Feeder at any time, or multiple times. - It is my duty to learn every nuance of my Feeder’s cock and what pleasures him the most. I accept not to bite unless my Feeder desires it. I agree to surrender to deep throating, to face-fucking, to multiple cocks and being roughly used. I will never stop until my Feeder is finished with me and truly satisfied In conclusion, as a cocksucker, my sexual identity is tied to the cock of another Man. I know that in life I will only achieve fulfillment through the graciousness and charity of my Feeder and hereby vow with all sincerity to service my Feeder to the best of my ability and strive to improve my technique. The consequences in breaking this contract will result in my spiritual, sexual and physical starvation.

It's a soggy Saturday here in Essex, UK what's everyone up to?  My shopping was done, all domestic was done for me so I am relaxing today after working all week. With a few late nights working too today chilling listening to the rain under a cover works for me. Thinking about the show and tell mix of my edits in chapter 10 of 25.  I haven't written any songs for a while but I will. The art is flowing from me so the next stage to turn them digital will progressed once my edited manuscript goes to readers. Meanwhile I gather hand drawn designs and store them in a box folder.   

== Results from bdsmtest.org ==100% Rope bunny100% Masochist98% Submissive82% Boy/Girl70% Experimentalist69% Brat66% Non-monogamist65% Exhibitionist64% Ageplayer64% Slave62% Primal (Prey)56% Degradee41% Voyeur33% Vanilla19% Pet

7/25/24- Theres a part of our dynamic that doesnt seem to be acknowleged for what it is..  " Our aim is to connect with the right female who resonates with the idea and has the desire of joining a household but specifically our household... My first girl oversees everyone when I am not present, as work takes me for periods of time. Your domestic duties in the home would be light as its shared amongst the three of you. Simple mundane tasks that your basic upkeep any nucular family household would require, with opportunities to take on more responsibilities if desired over time. Your outward role may be that of a “roommate” or a "housekeeper” to those who don’t know the lifestyle," No this doesn't mean were looking for a maid. We're looking for a sub  and were trying to make it clear that we expect other people to not understand the lifestyle choices everyone makes and that if you are living in this house you will have house responsibilities and expected to help keep it clean. This is common sense. Yes there are two other females in this home but that doesn't mean you don't get to do anything but be in a bed 24/7.... I mean we have to let you out to shower at some point right?  All jokes aside- hoping to find a sub that is service orientated, has slave tendency, or wants to be a slave.  

All in the Name There are still many people on this planet who don’t know the acronym BDSM and what it stands for. Here’s one example of this: “A company is hiring someone for a Business Development, Sales and Marketing positionufpu

“A dominant man is” A dominant man is observant. He watches, he notices, he takes in the environment. He does this not only to monitor your responses, he does this to keep you safe. In the same way a lead on the dance floor should mostly be looking at couples around them, not on their follower. A dominant man is watching the environment so you can feel safe enough to let go. He is watching you to see what you aren’t saying. He observes. A dominant man is patient. He knows that as much as you might want to open up, it takes some time for your subconscious and your nervous system to catch up. You need to relax, you need to feel safe, and he needs time. To explore, to feel you, to gauge what you like and don’t like, he needs time with your body and your mind and he is patient enough to take it. And he is patient over and over again, not just once but many times, giving you the communication that he is steady and present and he will not leave you to flounder.”  

Suddenly he pulls away and your mind races with concerns that you did something wrong.  Without hesitation his mouth takes in one nipple warming it up with a gentle suction and flickering of his tongue.  The sucking stops and you feel his tongue passing through your cleavage to the other nipple to give it attention that it deserves. Again his mouth leaves your yearning breast and his tongue goes back to the valley between them. His tongue again started its journey down to your belly button making sure to circle it several times and finally penetrating it.  You suddenly realize his hands were cupping your ass cheeks but was too distracted earlier to notice their firm grip.     His finger tips now over the top of your lacy panties he again starts moving slower than molasses and begins to pull them down, while his tongue begins to wonder around.  Just as you think he’s going to take them all the way to the floor he stops halfway down to your knees and his tongue pulls away. Again you fret trying to figure out what you did wrong to make him stop. He places his forehead against you just below your bellybutton sending his heat all through your pelvic area.  His warm hands gently slide between your legs like a wedge or a person praying.  His hands now pressing on the most inner part of your thighs and his thumbs slide across your lower lips. You suddenly realize your  juices are gushing by now. Knowing his hands and your panties are dripping wet he pulls them off, hoping he doesn’t throw them towards a wall to see if they stick. He whispers in your ear, DON’T MOVE! and walks away,  now what runs through your mind. He returns and gives you another little kiss on the lips. As you’re standing there you feel a feather touching your right ear, it goes under your chin and back up to your left ear. It moves to your nose the down to your chest. The feather gently caresses around your left breast then over to your right breast.  The feather ventures to each nipple circling them several times.  Down towards the belly button it travels circling it several times.  The feather heads to your hip and then down the outside of your leg around your ankle and back up the inside of your leg cross up above your pubic hair carefully making sure not to get it wet.  He takes your hand in his and reminds you to keep your eyes closed. You recognize the way to your bedroom and he places you next to your bed. 

I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America and to the Republic for which it stands, one Nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all. Former US Army Chiefs of Staff chairman Mark Milley 4 Star General https://www.washingtonpost.com/nation/2024/10/12/mark-milley-donald-trump-fascist/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oFVuQ0RP_As https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9to_1UYH5rE https://www.c-span.org/video/?539560-1/joint-chiefs-staff-chair-mark-milley-discusses-us-national-security    

I could Not update my profile without risking a long approval period, so I am updating here! my age is 47, not sure why that never updates. I am Heterosexual not pan sexual (not sure how that got changed). I am worth the time and effort, a one of a kind woman, who is not soon forgotten.  Looking for a male Dom in my area for real time. I am a sub, I will NOT send you dirty pics. Please be single and available, please be real, please be honest, please have your life together, as I do.  I am again looking for real time, would prefer a HOH type arrangement or relationship. Please be ready to verify who You are and meet within a reasonable timeframe! I am a loyal sub, I am kind and understanding, and mostly obedient ;).  I do not play games and expect you wouldn't want to either.  I like to travel, read, go to the beach, and write. I can hold a conversation. I hope you can as well!  I am passionate about this lifestyle and see it as a way of life, not a bedroom game.  thank you for looking at my profile! 

**The Bear’s Den**   The air in his apartment was thick with the scent of leather and cedar, a primal musk that clung to my skin as I knelt on the cold hardwood floor. My wrists were bound behind me, the rope biting just enough to remind me of my place. At six foot two, I was no small man, but in his presence, I felt like a fragile thing, a hundred pounds of trembling need locked in a cage of my own submission. The chastity device around my cock was a cruel reminder of his control, its metal teeth grazing my skin with every futile twitch of arousal. I was his, utterly, and the weight of that truth made my chest tighten.   He loomed over me, a mountain of muscle and menace, his broad frame blocking the dim light from the single lamp in the corner. His name was Viktor, a bear of a man with a barrel chest, arms like oak trunks, and a beard that scratched my skin raw when he’d kissed me earlier, claiming my mouth with a hunger that felt like a storm. His eyes, dark and unreadable, held a sadistic glint that made my stomach churn with fear and desire. Yet, beneath that cruelty, there was a flicker of something softer—something that made me trust him, even as my heart raced with dread.   “You’re mine tonight,” he growled, his voice a low rumble that vibrated through the room. His massive hand gripped my chin, forcing my gaze up to meet his. “My little cock sock. You ready to be used?”   I nodded, my throat too dry to speak, the chastity cage tightening as my body betrayed me. His lips curled into a smirk, sinister and knowing, as he released my chin and stepped back, his boots heavy against the floor. He unbuckled his belt with deliberate slowness, the clink of metal echoing in the silence. My eyes followed the movement, hypnotized, as he freed himself, his cock thick and heavy, already glistening with intent.   “Open,” he commanded, and I obeyed, my lips parting as he stepped closer. The first thrust was brutal, filling my mouth until I gagged, my eyes watering as he held my head in place. “That’s it,” he murmured, his voice softening for a moment, a strange tenderness in his tone. “Take it like a good boy.” His fingers stroked my hair, a fleeting gesture of care that made my chest ache, even as he fucked my throat with ruthless precision.   The chastity cage was torture, my cock straining uselessly against its confines as he used me. He teased me with words, his voice a dark melody. “Look at you, so desperate, so denied. You’ll get nothing until I say so.” His laughter was low, cruel, but his thumb brushed a tear from my cheek, and I leaned into the touch, craving the warmth behind his dominance.   He pulled out abruptly, leaving me gasping, my lips swollen and slick. “Up,” he ordered, yanking me to my feet by the rope binding my wrists. My legs trembled as he led me to the bed, a massive iron-framed thing draped in black sheets. He pushed me face-down, my chest pressed into the mattress, my ass exposed and vulnerable. The air was cool against my skin, but his hands were fire, spreading me open with a possessiveness that made my pulse race.   “You’re gonna feel me,” he said, his voice dripping with dark promise. I heard the snap of a lube bottle, the slick sound of him preparing himself, and then the blunt pressure of his cock against my hole. I whimpered, the stretch immediate and overwhelming, my body resisting even as I craved it. “Relax,” he growled, but there was a gentleness in his grip, his fingers kneading my hips as he eased inside, inch by agonizing inch. The pain was exquisite, a burning fullness that made me feel alive, claimed, his.   He fucked me with a rhythm that was both punishing and deliberate, each thrust driving me deeper into submission. The chastity cage rattled with every movement, a constant reminder of my denial, my cock throbbing uselessly as he used me. “My perfect little sock,” he taunted, his voice tight with lust. “Made for this, weren’t you?” I could only moan, my mind fogged with sensation, the world narrowing to the heat of him inside me.   Then, without warning, he slowed, his thrusts shallow, teasing. I felt a new warmth, a strange pressure, and realized with a jolt what was happening. He was pissing inside me, claiming me in a way that felt filthy and intimate, a violation that made my caged cock ache with need. “Take it,” he whispered, his voice softer now, almost reverent. “Every part of you is mine.” The sensation was overwhelming, a mix of shame and surrender, and I whimpered, my body trembling under his weight.   He pulled out slowly, leaving me empty and aching, only to grab me by the hair and pull me to my knees again. “Open,” he said again, and I did, my mouth ready for him. The taste of him was sharp and bitter as he released another stream, his piss flooding my throat as I struggled to swallow, to please him. His hand cupped my face, his thumb tracing my jaw, and I saw that flicker of care again, a silent promise that he’d never push me past what I could handle.   When he was done, he knelt beside me, his massive frame enveloping me as he untied my wrists. “You did so well,” he murmured, his voice a balm against the raw edges of my submission. He kissed my forehead, his lips soft where they’d been cruel, and pulled me into his arms. The chastity cage remained, a final act of denial, but his warmth, his strength, made it bearable. I was his—used, claimed, and cherished in the dark, mysterious dance of our desires.

VOTED YESTERDAY!  Wow it feels good to know it is done. I've always marveled at the lost opportunity and lackadaisicle approach to citizenship by those who choose not to vote.  Indeed, they often are the ones with the most protests.  Chit or get off the pot I say!   Too many think it is their right to be born, right to have rights, right to complain without productivity.  Of course I agree, we do have the right to not participate, but that IS participation in and of itself though I tend to believe it is almost passive aggressive in nature and not courageous or dare I say honoring the priveledge we receive in this country and many others. I'm more of the mindset that it is our duty as Global Citizens, to do our part to contribute to the human condition positively and proactively.  I know, I've heard all the arguements and it still doesn't pass muster with Me.  Take Jehovah Wintnesses - they dont' participate in ANY voting as they believe mans laws have no place under God's laws.  Imagine that!  A whole section of society that profess not to partake in any governing over their lives.  While I can intellectualize their choices and appreciate their contributions as they are - it BLOWS My mind they remain silent so to speak. The examples go one and on.  At the end of the day - "IF YOU WANT TO MAKE THE WORLD A BETTER PLACE, TAKE A LOOK AT YOURSELF AND MAKE A CHANGE". Get out and VOTE!  Better still, go get yourself an absentee ballot and VOTE TODAY!

Hmm let's see it is now 2022, so a lot have time has passed between my last real post. So many things have gone on in my life since then. In 2019 I took part in the World Transplant Games in the UK. That was a hell of a trip. Spent a few days in London, then went north to Yorkshire, to the land of James Herriot, Castle Howard, and my friends farm. I spent 5 days helping take care of their herd of pigs. Can't wait to go back. I return to London for my last 9 days and ate great food, saw amazing things, and got to see New Japan Pro Wrestling do their first show in England. Got home just before second year started. my next games are next year in Perth Australia. I will be cycling I will have a 5k time trial, a 20km team time trial, and another 30k time trial. Boy my legs are going to hate me. I had a pair of custom painted shoes done just for the games. I am hoping to be able to get a racing suit and a helmet wrapped in the same pattern.  i am hoping to spend a bit of time in Tokyo on my way to Australia. Maybe spend 5 days. 

The Most Dangerous Woman in the Room Intelligence is non-negotiable for me. Not as a preference, not as a nice-to-have. As oxygen. The dynamic I crave lives and dies on the quality of mind across from me, and frankly, a dull submissive is the least interesting thing I can imagine. What would be the point of the subversion without something worth subverting? Because that is what this is, at its core. Subversion. And it is my favorite thing about my own dominance. There is a particular kind of woman the world has decided it understands. Beautiful, polished, old money in her bones and silver screen glamor in the way she moves. The kind of woman who makes a room recalibrate when she enters it, not loudly, but inevitably. The world looks at her and thinks it knows the story: the accomplished man beside her, the elegant life, the complementary pair. Matched. Balanced. Conventional, underneath the gorgeous surface. The world is wrong, and I find that endlessly delightful. He is, to every outside eye, exactly what he appears: successful, intelligent, the kind of man other men respect without quite knowing why. He carries himself well. He speaks well. He is, in every social context that matters to anyone watching, her equal, if not more. The couple that makes people feel vaguely inspired just by existing in the same room. And then the door closes. And he kneels. That gap, between the world's assumption and the private truth, is where the magic lives for me. It is cinematic in the way that only real things can be cinematic, because no one scripted it, no one performs it for an audience, no one gets to see it but us. It is entirely, privately ours. A secret folded inside the most publicly acceptable packaging imaginable. There is something about a genuinely powerful man choosing, with full understanding of what he is doing, to place himself at the mercy of a woman who will use that power exactly as she sees fit, that feels like the most honest thing two people can construct together. Not despite his strength. Because of it. Submission means nothing from someone who had nothing to surrender. The kneeling matters because of who is doing the kneeling. And I will not pretend the aesthetics are irrelevant, because they are not. The cut of a well-made dress. The particular quality of composure that reads as warmth to strangers and means something else entirely to him. The way the room sees two people and I know, with complete and unhurried certainty, exactly what is happening under the surface of every pleasant exchange. That knowledge is its own kind of power, and I wear it the way I wear everything: beautifully, and without explaining myself to anyone. The Trad wife trope exists as a container for a certain kind of woman. Lovely, accomplished on the correct terms, a complement to the man she stands beside. I find that container useful primarily for how satisfying it is to blow the bottom out of it, privately, completely, in ways the people who built it will never see coming and never get to witness.   That, to me, is what real magic looks like.

I am NOT a Pro Domme, but I use an app for texting called Telegram.  It is a free app. If you think it's a scam Look IT UP! Also, I'm not interested in games. If you are not sure if you're submissive, please don't bother contacting me. I am not intestered in "trying" to see.  I am also on Skype and fetlife.  Atomteacher for both. If you are local or willing to relocate feel free to send me a respectful message. I will NOT dominant you online, sext, role-play or watch you jerk off on Skype.  I will NOT send you pictures, videos or provide you material to masterbate to! There's plenty of porn online, use THAT not ME. I want a real person, a real D/s relationship! Please don't waste my time!    I require daily contact to properly vet you. If you are too busy to send me a text daily, then you are too busy for me. If you can watch YouTube on toilet for 20 minutes then I really think you give me that much time daily through the vetting process.      

lyrics Some lyrics from the song all the ways i can die by the band arrows in action Self sabotage is an old friend of mine self care just isnt worth the time

I'm going to use an anecdote to give a little insight about what I like. It may be a little long but bear with me. I had a Dom/friend, he's in Arkansas now, we met at a party & his then GF was yelling at him & he was yelling at her. Was ruining the vibe so I told her to go upstairs, and took him outside. Went up stairs, chatted with her: She didn't like him talking to other girls. Stupid nagging problems. Went downstairs. Talked to him out in the alley. He didn't like that she slept with his friends when she was mad at him. Which sort of ticked me off. Anyway we chatted and he gave me an out of the blue kiss. Then next day all day sucking/fucking. He liked playing the XBox while getting head. Watching porn and getting head. And having someone to rub his feet, his back. I told him his ex GF was a bitch & the worst kind - the one who sends pics of her fucking to him. He did love her and It made me want to please and make him feel special. I told him he could do whatever he wanted with me. He liked being complimented and thought of. I like his build & personality. He had some kinks like enjoying being rimmed, choking, verbal and I was always open for him when he needed to fuck. I liked it when he sat on my face and made me eat his ass while he relaxed and even when he put his foot in my mouth and had me worship his feet. I enjoyed him being at a desk with me under it, soft cock in my mouth. It'll grow until it was ready to fuck my face then after he came it'll rest in my mouth until he was ready again. We became pretty good friends. Discreet fuck buddies the entire time since the crazy Ex was still around & we both liked no one knowing our business. He moved out to AK closer to family but we both had a great time and I enjoyed being there for him and making him feel like a King. I knew my place, he knew my place and we both knew his place. - 2017

Communication Matters! Open,  honest,  forthright Communication is essential.  "He voluntarily and openly commits himself to serve the needs of the dominant partner.. . and by accepting, she fulfills his need to serve. Where things go from there will vary from relationship to relationship depending on the mutual desires and unique personalities of the partners."

pet store (1/3) you lead me into the pet store quietly, just smiling to yourself when i shiver from the cool air on my already wet pussy. you hold my hand as we walk through the store, but move to stand behind me when we get to the collars and leashes. you place your hands possessively on my hips and pull me back against you, enjoying the view down my top as my breathing speeds up. "it's time, baby," you whisper into my ear. "what kind of collar do you want?" i hadn't thought about helping you choose my collar. i had half expected to wake up one morning to find it around my throat, if i was being honest, and i was overwhelmed by the choices. i shake my head, and you feel the moment my trembling shifts from arousal to panic. you pull me closer and kiss the side of my throat. "you're not choosing," you remind me. "you're helping me, but this is not up to you." your voice is sterner now and i sink into it, letting you steady me. "clear?" "yes sir." you kiss me on the throat again, in a spot i know will soon be covered up by your collar, and i moan softly. "good girl," you murmur before letting me go. i watch you walk up the aisle before moving to the collection of leather collars. i lose track of you while i look through the rows of collars, touching the cool leather, feeling how supple or stiff they are, shaking them to see how much noise they make and how heavy they are. i turn back to you as you walk back down the aisle toward me. you pick up one of the training collars, a metal one with spikes on the inside, and hold it up, jangling it to make sure you have my attention. my breathing speeds up again and you laugh a little when i squeeze my thighs together and reach out to the wall of collars to steady myself, but you put it back on its shelf. "maybe next time," you tell me, and finish walking back to me. you reach out to touch the collar i was looking at with one hand, and the other slips under my skirt, trailing up and down the slickness coating my inner thighs. you trace those wet fingers over my lips and i greedily suck them into my mouth, moaning a little at the taste of us. you start to pull your hand away but i hold onto it, making sure i haven't missed anything and rocking my hips in time to my sucking. you laugh at my whine when you finally remove your fingers from my mouth. "such a desperate little thing you are, babe." you move to stand behind me, trapping me between your body and the wall of collars. "this one?" i don't know how your voice is completely steady, considering you have one hand under my skirt again and i can feel you getting hard. when you first brush against my pussy lips, i look around, making sure we're alone. "eyes ahead," you tell me, your fingers stroking up and down my wet cunt. "tell me why this one." "it's pretty. i like--" i stop, ging when your fingers find my clit. a light pinch from you brings me back. "i like that it looks delicate, light pink with little gold hearts." i'm trying to grind against your fingers now, but you keep them far enough away that i can't get any relief. "and?" i can't help the whine that escapes me when you slip two fingers inside me. i rock against your fingers as i continue. "i like the matching bracelet. i can wear that whenever i can't wear the actual collar. so i'm always collared. always yours." i barely squeeze it out before you're pulling your hand out from under my skirt and i whine louder. you step back and watch me as you bring your fingers to your mouth. i'm still braced against the wall, eyes closed, hips rocking against nothing. there's a trail of pussy juice dripping down my legs and i can't hold back all the little moans and whimpers. "look at you, my pathetic, wanton slut. we haven't even looked at leashes yet."

I am a Cultured creative Sapiosexual Goddess who thrives on stimulating conversation, traveling, hiking, swimming, trail running, working out, kayaking, boating, taking walks on the beach, viewing art, attending comedy events, and soaking up adventurous moments. I live a very active lifestyle without social media, news, alcohol, and mundane things that are designed to shift our focus. I'm the extraordinary experience that your body, mind, soul, and spirit crave! You've found what you've been missing! Are you ready for a different experience?!~~. Or will you cling to what you've been used to and wonder why you keep getting the same results? That's called Insanity! Don't be afraid to try something different. You Will Like It. ~~~Energy is Everything~~~_Be My SubLet's explore Boundaries Of Pleasure~Your credentials, accolades, and worldly materials mean absolutely nothing to me. What does your Energy say? If the vibe is right and you are open to sexually experiencing new things without hangups, we 'might' can embark upon some wonderful adventures together and create memories that last a lifetime. It's sure to be a pleasureful adventure for the both of us.

Slaves, I want you to hear the lesson of O. Many outside our walls see her story as nothing more than chains and cruelty. But those who look deeper understand: O’s journey is about love, devotion, and the freedom found in surrender. O was not forced into her role. She chose it. She chose to give herself, body and soul, as a gift. In that choice, she discovered a truth most people never will—that once you give everything, nothing can be taken from you. Fear has no power over a woman who has already surrendered all that she is. In her devotion, O found peace. No longer torn between the noise of society and the endless burden of decision, she embraced clarity. She was no longer scattered or divided. She was whole, because she knew her place and her purpose: to serve. This is what I want you to understand in this House. Your surrender is not weakness. It is not loss. It is strength, because you choose it. You choose to hand me the responsibility of your life and to trust in my guidance. That trust is not small—it is the foundation of who we are together. Symbols matter in this. O wore her ring and her brand, not as decorations, but as declarations: I belong. I am his. When you wear my collar, it carries the same weight. It is not a piece of metal or leather. It is your vow and your truth. It is the mark that says to the world: I serve Master G, and in that service, I am complete. This lesson is even more important in a House with more than one slave. Just as O learned to give herself first to René, then to Sir Stephen, so too must each of you learn to see beyond your own pride or fear. Service does not weaken when it is shared—it becomes stronger. Devotion to me binds you together. If you fight one another, you weaken the chain. If you stand as one in obedience, you strengthen this House. The world outside is full of choices, distractions, and chaos. Here, in this House, there is order. Here, you find peace through service. Here, you are free—not free to do as you please, but free to become who you truly are. Remember O’s lesson: by giving all, she became whole. By surrendering, she found herself. And so will you, if you embrace your place with obedience, humility, and devotion.   —Master G

Communication is key: Make sure you are clear about your desires and boundaries, and listen actively to your partner's needs and limits. Respect boundaries: Always respect your partner's limits and never push them to do something they are not comfortable with. Safe, sane and consensual: Always practice safe and consensual BDSM, and never engage in activities that could cause serious harm. Learn and educate yourself: Take the time to learn about BDSM practices, safety measures and the different types of play. Be honest and authentic: Be true to yourself and your desires, and never pretend to be something you're not. Empathy and compassion: Show empathy and compassion towards your partner and always strive to create a positive experience for them. Be flexible and open-minded: Be open to new experiences and be willing to adapt your approach when needed. Take responsibility: Take responsibility for your actions and be willing to make amends if you make a mistake. Practice self-care: Take care of yourself physically and emotionally, and make sure that you are in the right mindset before engaging in BDSM activities. Have fun: Remember that BDSM should be enjoyable for both partners, so don't take things too seriously and have fun with it.

What I seek is more than play/sex. Maybe if you get to know me as a human being you might have more luck. I seek that feeling of danger, but knowing I am safe from harm. He is in control of his life and doesn't have to beat his chest to prove his dominace. He doesn't beg for my submission, he proves himself worthy of it by consistency, that calm controled authority, and care. He may well be sadistic, but that is not what drives him.  He is playful and has a great sense of humor, but can tame my brat with a look, a growl, or a snap of his fingers. He is demanding, an asshole even, but he gives of himself freely. His time, his energy, his focus.  He has time for the mating dance and is dedicated to the process.  He is equally at home beating my behind or taking a romantic stroll down the beach He is not afraid of his inner sadist. I seek 24/7 tpe with the right one but I have learned that not everyone, in fact very few, are worthy of my submission. I cannot leave NZ perminantly.

7/31/2024 6:49:25 PM   A very warm and grateful send out to those who have contacted Me to share of their own story and their strength and well wishing.  This was quite unexpected and I appreciate the consideration shown and stories shared.  My very best to you and yours and thank you for the kindness, it means much and has indeed given Me some strength in carrying on.  xox

My story......Back in 2007 I filed for divorce divorce after 20 years of marriage. I got very tired of his narcissistic behaviors. There was one time that I should have called the police on him and I didn't and that's when my ex attempted to choke my oldest child, because she said something under her breath and he heard it. It was Israel also in 2007 that I was introduced to this lifestyle, by a doctor friend of mine. He was the one to train me so to speak and introduce me to it. I am very thankful for him.  in 2009, my divorce was finalized, the day before my 52nd birthday.  I have had many subs and slaves over the years. Mostly part time.  People have asked me why don't I have one now and that is because when I moved to Florida from Connecticut I released my sub/slave.  It's very difficult to find one that is not a "do me" type. I am looking for a very specific type. I am looking for one that will be able to mix vanilla and Ds. I'm also looking for a long term relationship. I'm not looking for a live in, at this time. Please be sure to read the rest of my journal entrie. 

Sometimes physical things are not the heaviest things to remove.  Told that just now to a friend who recently lost their mother, and was tasked with cleaning out the house.  Sometimes i say things so deep, that i make myself pause and think. Last night, i was venting to one of the people in my RPG guild in ESO.  He was saying how he just needed reminders about posting stuff on the site and whatnot.  i told him i was done giving him reminders, and he asked why.  That was when a dam i hadn't known was ready to break, burst.  i told him, that if someone really wants to do something, they will do it.  They will do whatever they must, to ensure it happens. i reminded him that he has a wife, and a professional life, and he must be doing well enough to govern himself.  i asked him, who looks after me, who gives me reminders to do things? i reminded him, how i have -no one-.  i have sticky notes all over the place, a phone full of alarms and reminders, because my memory is crap... How is it fair, that i should have to hand-hold grown adults in the guild, to remind them and chase after them to look after their own characters.  Told him i was done, time people sink or swim. Of course, all that has ~nothing~ do to with the Lifestyle or genre on this site... Just another peek though, into my mundane life.    

Its the girls weekend to play. An play we shall!! Ive be looking forward to this weekend.. Welcome to my Group of Dommes. Ms Rhonda from New Jersey.

Dear Diary, Today, I find MYSELF indulging in thoughts that have lingered at the back of MY mind for far too long. I’VE always envisioned MYSELF having two bases—one here in London, and another somewhere warm and inviting in Europe. For years, the idea has danced around in MY head, but I’VE never quite had the energy or the right moment to set things in motion. However, something feels different now, and I sense that if I don’t act soon, this dream might just slip away. So, I’M taking the plunge and starting MY research on plans for MY second base. The idea of renting a small studio flat somewhere in Europe has always appealed to ME. I’VE been thinking about Portugal or Spain, with Portugal currently taking the lead. The thought of a cosy, sun-drenched space where I can retreat, recharge, and, of course, still keep a watchful eye on all of you from afar, is intoxicating. Portugal has a certain charm that keeps calling out to ME —it's beautiful landscapes, rich culture, and warm climate are just what I need. But I’M still open to suggestions. Perhaps there’s a hidden gem I haven’t considered? Or maybe some of you have thoughts on why Spain might be a better fit for ME? I’d love to hear your thoughts, MY devoted ones. After all, this isn’t just about finding a place; it’s about creating a second home—a sanctuary where I can rule from, wherever I may be. Your input could very well shape where this next chapter of MY life takes ME. BLACK GODDESS 

The List of Red Flags--Profile Edition I'm back on Collarspace after a short hiatus.  As an experienced Domme, I see all the red flags before everyone else.  I know who arethe kinkiest: shoutout to Florida and Australia for having some of the kinkiest people on the planet.  There are a lot more creepy ass people on here than before, and a bunch of fantasy seekers and married men.  Its a complete waste of time.  LOCATION-- Ghost profile. If the profile does not state a location, they're not looking to be found.  Move on. No Kinks Listed: Someone new, inexperienced or fantasy seeker NO BDSM TEST RESULTS:  If you don't know who you are kinkwise, you lack self awareness.  This is generally a sign of a narcissist. NO PIC:  Not looking to be found.  Unless the account is new, there should always be a photo.   DICK PICS: Person is a dick.    If the picture is of someone exceptionally attractive, buyer beware.  Attractive people get attention.  They don't need an ad.

Here are a few things that I should have added to my profile but didn't and I don't wanna wait forever for it to be approved again. 1. Do not message me if you are not in my state, it clearly says in my profile I am looking for a Dom in or around my area. This means in North Carolina only (maybe as far as SC but I am not willing to travel). 2. Do not contact me if you are a sub or slave male asking me if I want to own you and you be my so called puppy. I am NOT into pet play and I have a real life dog that is already challenging enough, I don't need a human wannabe dog. I am also NOT a Domme, my name clearly says that I am sub and my profile clearly points that out.  3. No I will not do online with you, my life is very busy as is and sending me a message that says "when are you available" as your first one as well as you having no profile except that you wanna be please orally then yeah you're not getting a response from me.  4. If you think that all subs should be sexual to be in a dynamic move on, I know plenty who are in nonsexual D/s dynamics and they have been going strong for years.  5. Do not tell me that you want to mentor me yet want to play with me. A mentor never plays with who they are mentoring, the person being mentored is looking to that person for advice. If you think differently then don't bother contacting me.  6. Yes I am married, yes he knows I am in the lifestyle and yes he does approve. I have written this in my profile but it seems like it goes ignored. Just because I am married is not the only reason why I am nonsexual, I have other reasons as well.  7. Please stop asking if I have kids. Just because I'm married doesn't mean I do and the answer is no I do not and never want them. If your first message to me is "what's your availability" and you have a virtually blank profile then you will more than likely be ignored.

A record of a night out, recalled by the lady, written by me. Dinner. My phone warbled, from the tone I knew it was a text from Steve. ‘Blue’ was all it said. It was an instruction on what colour of underwear I was to wear tonight. That my lover had been thinking of what I should wear closest to the most intimate parts of me made an interesting diversion from a dull meeting and I took a moment to enjoy the prospect of what tonight held. 5pm arrived and I was out of the building like a sprinter, trailing my suit bag and case behind me! He had booked me into the beauticians for 5.30 and it was a cab ride away, luckily the station was only around the corner and a taxi was waiting in the rank. Leaning to the passenger window I breathlessly asked ‘The beauticians on Marchmont St as fast as you can please’. I jumped in the back and we took off as if he knew why I was in a hurry! On arrival I gave the Cabbie a £20 note and ran in through the black shop doors. The receptionist said ‘Ms Canning? booked in by Mr Mitchell?’ Yes I replied and was introduced to a middle aged lady who led me downstairs. Sitting in a consultation area she asked me a few questions that gave me some insight into what Steve had planned for this evening. I was going to be waxed, a Hollywood plus my legs, all my nails were to be done, a full facial and my hair was going to be worn ‘up’. My makeup was also going to be done, and a massage had been booked. I was going to be collected at 7.15 so time was tight. First I was waxed, it had been done before however this time all the hair was to be removed, including from my armpits, I was told to strip, and put on a dressing gown. I lay back on the white padded table, placed my lower legs in the cradles and tried not to seem embarrassed though the blotches on my throat gave my true feelings away away. As I had been booked in by a man they must have realised why I was there. I loved being Steve’s submissive however I still felt embarrassed if I thought people knew. Once she had started removing the faint traces of hair two women joined her and my finger and toenails were filed and prepared. They were finished before I had to turn over and kneel on all fours; they gently held my buttocks apart as she removed all vestiges of hair from around my anus. Once my eyebrows had been plucked I put on the dressing gown on and was taken to a large wet room and advised to shower quickly, but not to rub the waxed areas. It was heaven; the supply of toiletries was superb! I was quick, but called before I wanted to finish, trailing the dressing gown chord I went to the masseuse, Twenty minutes later I felt like a million dollars! She also applied the after wax solution to prevent in growing hair occurring. By now my mons was super smooth, and felt very sensitive.  Then back into the shower, a quick wash off to remove the oil and then I was dried in a hot air chamber! Marvellous sensations of being caressed by a powerful jet of warm air blowing up from the floor! I parted my thighs just more than was needed to feel its effect on all my bare skin! I thought this a luxury until I was surprised by being told I was having a spray tan applied to turn my skin the gentle tinge of honey gold that he loved. I blushed internally when the beautician informed me she had been told it had to be even, and all over. The private section of the beauty salon was the venue for my hair, make up, nails and I sat there nearly naked as people fussed around me. The facial was followed by the make up artist who asked what colour dress I was going to wear, dark blue I replied. By 6.45 I was being ushered into a dressing room where my bags had already been placed. I rolled the dark, seamed fitted stockings up my legs, the suspender belt had the proper metal clips so it was a simple job to fix them. The dark blue silky thong slid neatly between my buttocks. The bra was designed to give a little more cleavage than it needed to. Finally I slid the panties up my thighs. Steve sometimes expected me to wear them over a thong; he delighted in taking my panties off twice and knew I did not find a thong too comfortable to wear. It was part of why he made me wear one. My shoes were high and black patent leather with wide ankle straps. The dress was close fitting across the top, plunge necked almost to my bra and the slinky material fell from my waist to just above my knees. It had been slightly lined, so my elaborate underwear was not obvious. The shop called a taxi and I met Steve in the hotel foyer. Dressed in his DJ he was noticeable by his height but that was all that attracted attention. However I caught every male eye in the room. I crossed and embraced him as I always did if I knew what was good for me! It was a routine I had always felt embarrassed about, today it was more so as I was being watched by so many people. He murmured ‘You look absolutely stunning’. ‘Let’s get dinner out of the way, the clients wowed and committed to the project and you and I too our room.’ I stopped pressing myself against him as he finished speaking. Dinner was a fairly lively affair, if a little difficult due to the 3 different languages. It seemed the Japanese chap to my right could only communicate by looking into my cleavage. As I was the only woman I had no competition and wished I had! However as he was the senior partner in the firm placing the order I tried to show some interest and smiled until my jaw ached. By 10 it was done, a few good byes, an open ended expense account at a lap dancing club was organised and the rest of the party set off into the warm night air. Steve led me by the arm to the lift. His hand rested on my waist as the door shut, it was trailing across by bottom as the door closed. By the time it opened again the people in front of us would not have known his hand had been up my skirt and caressing my bottom and the length of my slit the whole way from the foyer to the 25th floor. By now my tummy had the light feeling that always presaged our time alone. I did not know whether I was to be spanked or made to pleasure him, the feeling in my tummy didn’t care. The room was large, the bed huge, it had a sitting area and a large desk. It was stylishly lit by wall lamps and just warm enough. The view out over London was amazing. He emptied his pockets onto the desk and removed his jacket. ‘Come here’ was a simple statement. It never failed to make my throat feel tighter. ‘Remove my tie’ was the next thing he said. I ran my fingertips over his neck and kissed where his shirt collar had been. He quickly spun me around so I faced a mirror, his arms encircled my waist and he whispered int

Gabriel was Jesus.  In Daniel chapter 8 through 10 a man visits Daniel. A voice confirms that it is Gabriel in Daniel 9:21. When the man appears to Daniel again in chapter 10 it does not state that it is Gabriel but I would think the same man would continue to come to him means though he showed up twice already to Daniel. It would not be needed to state a third time that it was Gabriel. And I believe if it was another person Daniel would have been told who it was like how he was told before that the man was Gabriel that came to him in chapters 8 and 9.   In chapter 10 it states that this man's appearance has a body of beryl, face like lightning, eyes like lamps of fire, arms and feet like polished brass, and a voice like the sound of a multitude. He is in the form of a man.    In John 17:5 Jesus is praying to his father in heaven and he states that he wants to be glorified at his side with the glory he has alongside the Father that he had before the world was.    This could be why Mary didn't notice him and mistook him as the gardener and why the one disciple had to put his fingers in the holes of Jesus's hands to truly believe that it was him.    Also in John 8:58 Jesus says before Abraham was I am. He was formed before we were ever created. He created us. He is the invisible image of God but gives all the glory back to the Father as he listens to the Father and does the Father's will. He was Gabriel the mouthpiece of God.    In revelations Jesus is said to come back with his face shining like the sun, voice like the sound of many waters, feet like burnished bronze, eyes like the flame of fire, and hair as white as wool, as a Son of Man meaning a human form with a divine presence.   

Scared off the Dom that It was presently Under consideration too.A Civvie that he didnt keep it confidence and discussed things about it without checking with it first Especially about it Military deployments and active duty.He went to a friend as a sounding board he trusted that person told him that he should run away as fast as he can because of what it has been involved with and committed too on its old life. How fucked up it is mentally and physically because of wars deploying and willingness to sacrificing its life for the greater good to make a difference.He told his friend that It works as a Prostitute to survive after another Dom it sacrificed its careers for to be totally focused on him and later he was found out to be a closet serial killer.And all the medical treatments and surgerys ahead of it. He turned out to be a frightened little rabbit that breaching it trust was the betrayal was so big he knew It couldn't forgive him.

Oh I wish I had a slave driver here, A useful chatty person near, Drives me to key appointments with notice set, Keen to be useful to me I bet. When I choose club play nights off we fly, Whips on his derriere produce mutual joy sighs.   Though now pleasant chat from the states only shows, Useless in practical life we all know. And I am a practical person through and through, So where are you Slave driver you not around tinges me blue.   Instead I am busy with study and skill, Developing life knowledge so my mind advances up a holl, Knowledge is power so I consume mine, Growing as a person through time.

Are you carrying heavy loads you wish would go away or that you could move away from them? Galatians 6:2 says we should carry each others burdens. We should come together to exhort and lift one another up. When two or more are gathered in Christ's name, He is with them. He also promises to give you rest when you are weary and burdened. As Christians we are not to use biased judgement or prejudice against another whether they be Christian or not. Christ is working behind the scenes and they very well could be saved even if their life doesn't look like it from your perspective. We should encourage one another to be loving, kind, blameless, and to love God and one another, enemies included. Seek godly wisdom and understanding. Be moved towards allowing Christ to evolve you from the inside out. Let your adorning be more inwards than it is outwards. The Bible is filled with practical truths that help you to show love, act in love, love others, love God, and even forgive and love an enemy. All scripture is God breathed and useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting, and training in righteousness. Please turn to Jesus today, he loves you enough to not leave you where you are. Life is a journey are you allowing him to walk it with you? 

Yes, I have been on this site for a bit. I am looking for the slave that is best to meet My desires. I am looking for long term and live in, when it happens. I do not expect instant match and move. I want any relocation to be permanent and good for both of Us. I hope you have watched the show Big Bang Theory. Living with Me is similar to living with the Sheldon character. At least in the aspect of I get what I want from a slave living with Me. If that isn't you then we will not work well together. I am open to one offs and play dates and such. So feel free to reach out for that also.

Public Service Announcement: There is no separate Bookmark feature so some of us use Favorites to Bookmark (Can you think of why one might not use the browser bookmart feature? Multiple reasons there too) Having seen the latest of a long string of examples of people expressing frustration about "someone added me to Favorites but never wrote me" and how could they do such a thing to me (in their case, I have not added them, or anyone else, to my Favorites in a while..but obviously someone else did) it's a good time to remember this basic fact: People sometimes use it to essentially bookmark. And there's many reasons one might do so. One might have positive or negative or neutral or mixed feelings about the profile as a whole or parts of it, or wish to look up a book or quote or something else in it and so on.    True, for a subset of cases, such an Add to Favorites might actually represent someone trying to be cute or trying to get your attention and not having the courage to... and so on, etc. But this applies to far, far from all instances.. Ascribing it to all cases would be not merely a case of stereotyping, but here, also, it would be a case of simply being flatly mistaken, in so many cases. It's easier to avoid needless conflict or tentson or worry by realizing such things and then making one's own choices about how or when or whether to respond.

I have been getting a lot of emails asking to hear from my husband M. He sometimes signs on here and speaks with those who write me. So, I asked him to write a little report about something meaningful that happened to him lately. This is what he produced.    This afternoon, I happened to be in my room (dressed in regular clothes minus pants) when K came in unexpectedly, wearing a sexy, silky, blue push-up bra, red ruffled panties, and her strappy white 5" heels. It was just prior to the 4th of July and this was supposed to be her holiday-appropriate outfit for her boyfriend.  Seeing that she had gotten dressed up for her boyfriend, I knew what was coming; in this house, when K gets dressed up in something sexy, I know I will be getting dressed up in the printed ABDL diapers instead of my typical white ones. Sure enough, after rummaging through my closet, she picked out a white and baby blue trimmed t-shirt that she then put over head after telling me to raise my arms. "Isn't that cute," she remarked with a pleasant but rather condescending tone. She really likes this shirt because it stops and my waist.  This was followed by telling me to lay down for a change from my usual plain white diapers to my thick printed diapers. It was a quick change, all business, she ignored my caged penis as usual other than dusting it with powder. As she stood me up and checked the tapes, I caught my reflection in the full length mirror that hangs on the back of my door. I felt so humiliated, the smell of pee-soaked diapers coming from the diaper pail in the corner mixed with the constant aroma of baby powder filling my nose as she dressed me like a toddler, knowing she was about to have wild sex in the other room--something I would be excluded from, as usual. "You look amazing, K. I can't believe what that bra does to your boobs." I complimented her. "Thanks baby, too bad they're not for you," she told me, cupping her big breasts in her hands to emphasize her point  with a little giggle and I felt my little penis straining in my chastity device. "But I could try again if you'd let me," I said, trying not to sound too desperate. "M, how long are you going to continue asking?", she said dismissing me, "I don't even understand why you ask at all. We already came to an understanding a long time ago now didn't we? Has anything changed? will it ever change?" I blushed at the memory and meekly replied, "No." She was right of course. When I think about the conversation we had the night she told me we'd never have sex again, I know that I accepted our new arrangement. It's just that I guess I haven't got out of the habit of trying.  Turning me around, she gave me a firm pat on my diapered bottom and strode out of the room. Looking in the mirror on the back of my door again as she closed it, I again blushed with shame. About a half hour later, I heard the knock and K answering the door. I stayed in my room, working on the computer listening to them chatting at first but then walking down the hall past my bedroom into hers. They had been in there with the door closed for about 20 minutes when I heard... "M, come in here." I walked in with a little waddle and an audible crinkle, to see her bent over her boyfriend who was lying on top of the master bed. She was deepthroating his big cock and I stared in mesmerized silence, watching the thick, slippery shaft disappear into her wet, eager mouth and throat.Some secret part of me wondered less how it would feel to have that done to me and more how it would feel in my own mouth. Swallowing hard, I instinctively put a hand on the front of my soft, cushiony diapers. I just stood there watching for what seemed like eternity ignored by both K and John, but in reality was probably no more than 5 minutes. Finally, with a wave of her hand, she dismissed me, sending me back to my room, or anywhere really, just not with them. Before long, the sounds of their enthusiastic lovemaking filled the house and I listened with rapt attention. Looking at my humiliating reflection in the mirror, I blushed with shame at my pathetic image. Both of them saw me as nothing but a complete submissive, that would never change. My cheeks flushed with humiliation at the thought and I rubbed the front of my diapers all the more frantically as I took in my reflection. The short shirt, the print on the diaper that was starting to fade from the wetness after two accidents, the outline of my cage on the plastic shell. I was in frantic need of an orgasm, but because of the cage, there was little effect. Feeling sexually frustrated and wanting more, I went to my dresser and grabbed my favorite jelly buttplug--the big clear one, which I rubbed down with the baby oil K sometimes uses during diaper changes. Pulling the back of my diapers down, I could hear K moaning in the other room and her boyfriend's subtle grunting as I began pushing the fat buttplug into my eager hole. I can barely handle the width of this plug, especially at first, and I moaned with a mixture of discomfort and angst. I couldn't get it in standing and dropped to all fours. At last, it slipped inside me and I exhaled in relief. Nevertheless, as I pulled my diapers back up and sat down in front of the mirror and soon began to savor the feeling of rubbery fullness filling my back passage. M was getting what she needed and I was getting as best I could.  I don't even know how long I had been sitting there grinding, which so far had only resulted in further desire when M staggered back into my room and right up in front of where I sat. I sat there frozen as she lightly guided her fingers between her legs then told me to stick out my tongue. I crawled to her, inhaling her amazing scent, caressed her legs as I plunged my face between her legs and she let her boyfriend's creamy cum drip onto my outstretched tongue. "I'm dripping baby boy, clean me up please" she said with a smug grin and stood now with her feet shoulder width apart.I couldn't help but hurriedly press my face into her body. I could smell the result of their lovemaking as another man's sperm completely coated my tongue while I cleaned her with my mouth. Some even dribbled down to land on the chest of my infantile t-shirt. Suddenly, to my surprise, she stood me up and pulled me with the waistband of my diaper to the chair in the corner of my room where she took a seat and I stood in front of her. She abruptly pulled my diapers down. I whimpered with fear as she bent me over her lap, selecting the wooden paddle on my dresser. Feeling the cool air on damp bare bottom, I squirmed knowing I wasn't going to like what was about to happen. "You will not ask for sex again", she quipped as she brought the paddle down across both my soft, tender cheeks pushing the plug into me. "I'm so sorry" I managed to get out between the 3rd and 4th smack. I cried miserably, occasionally glancing over at my humiliating reflection in the mirror. There could be no doubt who sat at the bottom of the social ladder in this house--that was for sure! At last she finished, and after setting the paddle down, she left closing the door. Leaving me to pull my diapers back up for myself.   Sigh...just another day's activities at my house...

Recently I've been having some fun on another site that specializes in Doms keeping subs in chastity. So last night I had this one guy... mid 30s... glasses.. looks like a real computer nerd approach me. I was not going to give him the time of the day and I sensed he was going to be a bit of a brat. But he begged, begged and pleaded. Eventually after a lot of negotiating and exchanging some links I agreed to put his dumb ass in chastity for a simple 2 hr lock. Guess how many times he messged me begging to be released during that 2 hour  span of time. 37x. I can't make this shit up even if I tried lol.  So naturally when I returned to the site after getting dolled up for the day I see the messages. And I'm pissed. Becuase I specifically told him to sit his ass in the corner with his cage on and butt plug in and wait for me to return. He got called every name after the sun which I'm sure he enjoyed and I extended the timer for the rest of the day. I also have access to his dildo machine via lovesense and let's just say today he could barely sit down without a pillow. He thanked me this morning :) he loved it. 

I'm irritated by the idiocy of some of these "subs" I'll meet you at a Starbucks and if I don't invite you home immediately thereafter you'll pull a typical fake sub move and not follow up. Most don't have the patience and respect to meet properly. To get vetted properly. Most think anybody declaring themselves a "sub" should be privy to my home immediately. No thought towards common sense or my safety?? I get these offers 5 times a week. Imagine if I gave my home address out that many times a week? I'd be murdered in less than a month by some fake predator. Or at the very least robbed and when you report something like that to police and say "I met him online" Boy how stupid do you look? Perhaps these idiots think I'm in a palace surrounded by gaurds? How much online porn must you watch before you actually think there's any likelihood that any of us REAL ladies are surfing for boys from within a palace. THAT lady isn't on collarspace, she has a caretaker whose job it is to find sub's. Out here in the real world a REAL domme works her 9-5 and expects her sub to do the same. To be sane. To be intelligent and productive within society. To be a regular guy and a sexy "trophy husband".

Here is the more detailed version of my "about me": It took me a while to settle in on using the name “breastfeedingboy”.  I went through several other possibilities first.  But I’ll explain that a bit. First ... you could say I’m very “mouthy”.  Because that’s what I do.  I use my mouth.  But more in that in a bit.  LOL I am in my 40s, live in the southeastern part of Pennsylvania.  I’m not married and I have no kids.  I am a straight guy with a steady job, a love for soup and steak and football. Now ... I have a strong jaw and am “mouthy” because I enjoy ... Breastfeeding, whether dry or otherwise.  If breastfeeding is something you crave having done to you, I am your titty boy.  Not just for a few minutes, but however long you desire.  Make me nurse you for hours.  I will keep up. Cunnilingus (eating p***y, to put it vulgarly).  From hood to perineum and every little place in between, I will give my tongue a workout so that you are made to skyrocket to the zenith.  If you are soppy wet, I will lick you dry.  If you are dry, I will lick you wet.  And I don’t stop until you tell me to.  If you wrap your legs around my ears or try to wiggle away, I stay with you and keep lapping until you verbally tell me to stop. Toe sucking with foot massages.  I’m still learning about this one but know that the entire foot needs pleasured while the toes are washed clean.  I will keep researching it and learning more about it.  But you could have the stresses of your day rubbed and sucked right out of your body through your feet and toes, all while you lean back and enjoy a glass of your favorite wine. Kissing (on the mouth), with or without the tongue.  ‘A woman can tell a lot about a guy, just based on the way he kisses.’ This may be a cliché statement, but it still has a great deal of truth to it.  If you can’t convey anything she likes through a kiss, what difference will the rest make? I am very big on hugs and cuddling. Now ... about the profile name. I thought about ‘oralslave’, but I’m not a slave. And using the word oral just sounded ugly. I thought about ‘mouthyboy’ but I felt that made me sound like a bratty smartass.  Nothing could be further from the truth.  I’m an obedient soul. I thought about “licknsuck” but then I immediately stopped considering that one as I wanted my name to show some class and some dignity. ‘breastfeedingboy’ was the goldilocks choice.   It sounded just right.    I’m not a slave and not interested in being one.  I would say I am a pleaser, which is why I selected submissive for my profile. I am most interested in making the female body feel goooood, slowly and in several different places on the body.  I will be looking for a woman who enjoys the company of someone with “mouthy” benefits. Other things I enjoy: Opening the door for a lady Pushing in the chair for a lady Flea Markets State Parks Action/Adventure Movies Suspense/Thriller Movies   I’m not offering a service.  And I’m also not looking to buy a service from anyone.  I am simply a submissive type guy who loves to use his mouth.  And I would love to meet the woman who would love to control my mouth in whatever way she wanted. So if you are interested in anything you just read on this profile, please contact me and let’s chat. ------------------------------   Not to come off as being rude but just so I’m not misleading anyone, I understand that sucking cock is also an oral “mouthy” thing to do.  But I am straight and I have no interest at all in doing that.  So you don’t need to contact me and remind me that sucking cock is oral.  I am aware that it is oral. There is absolutely no chance you will ever get me to do that.

sacred symphony: where love, lust, and devotion meet i’ve found myself at the crossroads of neurodivergence, spirituality, and kink—a meeting place where dominance isn’t just about power but about the profound and unending interplay of trust, ownership, and devotion. writing about these experiences feels like capturing the essence of an eternal union, where love, lust, and passion merge with spiritual and physical commitment to create a connection that transcends the fleeting and becomes permanent. this isn’t about navigating the surface of dating; it’s about diving into the sacred depths of what it means to fully belong to one another—body, mind, and soul. it’s about exploring devotion as an act of ultimate union, a fusion of spiritual and carnal energies that defy time and space. through my words, i seek to articulate the beauty and power of a connection that isn’t just a relationship but a lifelong symphony of surrender, love, and sacred commitment.  

I love being in a good place: Loving my response to a nosey kinkster:Have had 2 monogamous unions with 2 kinky odd balls I have had to put the odd balls back in the fish tankPersonally in a good place, received awards for my service literally, networking, working on my health and wellbeing, great hair, jogging again to loose some weight but average size so easy tone up and my bum looks great already just chiseling around average meat so all goodHey, my response is pretty chilled I must beI am sure you are knee deep in honest pussy all the bestC      

Through the Lens of Rika: The Sophia-Michael Connection Unveiled part 4   3. Energetic Exchange & Emotional Saturation   Because they are so emotionally intuitive, they can feel when you’re anxious or when there’s a lot of emotional weight. Instead of directly engaging with it, they sometimes retreat to process or focus elsewhere so they can re-align themselves energetically before coming back in. Energetic overwhelm can make them seem distant, even when they’re hyper-aware.   4. They Trust the Bigger Picture   Michael-embodied men might trust that the bond is strong enough that they don’t need to constantly reassure you through words. They trust the foundation they’ve built with you. This is where faith in the connection comes in—both for them and for you. They may think, “I don’t need to message her right now because we’re solid. My actions speak louder than words.”   5. Balancing the Divine Masculine Energy   These men carry divine masculine energy that values action over words. Their emotional intuition is real, but they channel it into action and protection, which may feel like distance to you. For you, as Sophia, it’s about recognizing that this is their expression of love. A quick "hi" might feel emotionally connecting to you, but to him, showing love could mean working to make sure everything is stable and secure for the future.   How to Navigate This:   Anchor into the trust that you’ve been practicing. When he’s distant, remind yourself of how he’s showing love through his actions, even when it’s not immediate. Say, “He’s providing for us, and his distance is part of his process. I trust him.”   Ground your emotional needs through spiritual or personal practices when he’s not available. Remember that just because he’s distant in the moment doesn’t mean the love isn’t there. Lean into your own energy and strengthen yourself while he works.   Embrace his rhythm—Michael-embodied men have a different rhythm of emotional connection, and part of your journey is learning how to move in sync with it without feeling left behind.   It's not that he doesn't feel your anxiousness—he does—but sometimes his response to that is through action and providing, not necessarily through quick emotional reassurances.    Michael's energy, embodied through these men, is both emotionally attuned and distant at times. This is part of their complex duality. Michael has that deep emotional intuition and empathy, which can sometimes feel overwhelming or intense. Yet, at the same time, they have a mission-oriented drive that pulls them into practical action and focus, which can lead to emotional distance, even though they feel everything just as much as you do.   Here’s why this happens:   1. Emotional Attunement vs. Practical Mission   Michael’s energy is deeply aware of emotions, but he also prioritizes taking action over expressing those feelings. He might sense your anxiety but instead of giving a quick emotional fix like a "hi," he might be channeling that into practical solutions—working behind the scenes to take care of things so that your long-term security is intact. For him, acting on love (through providing and stabilizing) sometimes takes precedence over talking about love.   2. Emotional Weight of the Protector Role   Michael-embodied men often carry a heavy responsibility as protectors. Their natural inclination to shield and secure means they’re constantly navigating how to balance this with emotional connection. Sometimes, they pull back because they’re processing deeply how to protect, guide, and create a future for you both, which takes up mental and emotional energy.   3. Energetic Exchange & Emotional Saturation   Because they are so emotionally intuitive, they can feel when you’re anxious or when there’s a lot of emotional weight. Instead of directly engaging with it, they sometimes retreat to process or focus elsewhere so they can re-align themselves energetically before coming back in. Energetic overwhelm can make them seem distant, even when they’re hyper-aware.   4. They Trust the Bigger Picture   Michael-embodied men might trust that the bond is strong enough that they don’t need to constantly reassure you through words. They trust the foundation they’ve built with you. This is where faith in the connection comes in—both for them and for you. They may think, “I don’t need to message her right now because we’re solid. My actions speak louder than words.”   5. Balancing the Divine Masculine Energy   These men carry divine masculine energy that values action over words. Their emotional intuition is real, but they channel it into action and protection, which may feel like distance to you. For you, as Sophia, it’s about recognizing that this is their expression of love. A quick "hi" might feel emotionally connecting to you, but to him, showing love could mean working to make sure everything is stable and secure for the future.   How to Navigate This: Anchor into the trust that you’ve been practicing. When he’s distant, remind yourself of how he’s showing love through his actions, even when it’s not immediate. Say, “He’s providing for us, and his distance is part of his process. I trust him.”   Ground your emotional needs through spiritual or personal practices when he’s not available. Remember that just because he’s distant in the moment doesn’t mean the love isn’t there. Lean into your own energy and strengthen yourself while he works.   Embrace his rhythm—Michael-embodied men have a different rhythm of emotional connection, and part of your journey is learning how to move in sync with it without feeling left behind.   It's not that he doesn't feel your anxiousness—he does—but sometimes his response to that is through action

Appears i am a permanent chastity sub/slave.  Locked 842 days as of 01/20/22.   As the sub, it’s a turn-off to see a sub-cumin during play.   While important both enjoy the scene, it’s all about the pleasure of the Dom.   An exception to “enjoy” is a discipline      The scene is about Dom’s pleasure and the sub should focus on them.  

Thought time for another update.Still looking for that true lifestyle Owner to take kjay into TOTAL 247 ownership as Their slave to use as They wish and make Their lives easier and more pleasurable. Think as stated before, for the right Owner kjay will give himself totally to Them as slave property , leave all current life behind, to be owned and serve , as a slave should. A number of chats have been done recently but so far none have resulted in kjay being taken as slave property, so the search for an Owner continues. kjay thanks his "slave bother" who is helping to keep kjay focused at the moment, while unowned, this is helping alot

 RelevantWellephant