Maintenance Beating There has been an on going discussion about maintenance beating.  Generally, I adhere to the idea of that in order to keep the slave's mind right. Of course, regular maintenance beatings are seperate and apart from punishements that may have been earned by the slave. Certainly, when intially entering My service daily maintenance beatings are necessary to promote acculturation.  Service to Me requires a greatly reduced ego in the slave.  That energy that was once selfe centered in the slave must be redirected to My benefit. Thing is, the slave that I desire wants exactly the same thing.  However, not infrequently its social adjustments have included messages about itself that contradict its inborn nature and it lives in conflict.  To the degree that conflict is resolved to that degree it finds peace and fullfilment. There is the issue of pain sluts.  These masochists crave punishment.  With this type I do have alternate means of ego right sizing. On an ongoing basis maintenance beatings will most likely be the rule in My house.  The frequency and intensity of the beating will be tailored to My desires, not the slaves.

So, many years ago I met someone on here, who absolutely blew my mind.  I'd never experienced control before and it was an amazing journey. From the very beginning, the controlling of my time, as in what I did with my free time, updates of where I would be at certain times in the day so they always knew where I was. Having to be available at specific times. Not a minute before or a minute after. Controlling how and when I touched myself if I could have an orgasm. Even my clothing having to replace my underwear with women's underwear. Sitting to go to the toilet. All these things which I was told was leading up to a very hard limit of feminizing. Which was a total mind fuck. Because with each step that I was pushed and you eventually that that limit would be pushed as well and if both scared and excited me at the same time.  Now I never knew as we never got to it if that would have happened, whether I would have been feminized or whether because it was a very hard limit of mine, it was simply used as a mind fuck. Either way it's certainly did the trick. The less freedom I had and the more control she took made me feel so submissive and so desperate to continue to please.

An ode to Jewels Tavern( Decatur Street-The French Quarter, New Orleans, Lousiana )Mardi Gras is March 1, in 2022.I had explored every bar in the French Quarter, except, JEWELS TAVERN. This was 1980, pre-AIDs, Mardi Gras morning about 5AM the French Quarter is a mini Las Vegas but trashier.  I was partying like a rock star at the Parade Disco, Playboy Magazine ranking the Parade Disco one of the top 10 Dance bars in the United States.  I was with my gay friends, I loved these guys they always set me up with their fag-hag female friends.  As I said, I was pretty *ucked up from drinking for the last 4 days almost non-stop.....  If you've been to Mardi Gras you get it......its the WILDEST CRAZIEST ADULT Halloween STREET PARTY maybe on Earth!  Its the United States version of Carnival in Brazil.  I got my courage up and asked Steve if he would take me to Jewels (Tavern).  I was pretty drunk but not crazy, I wasn't going into Jewels alone on Mardi Gras day, the wildest day of the year in New Orleans for my first visit to Jewels alone.  Steve had just gotten out of the Marines and was about 6 foot and of course buff, I wasn't going into Jewels without an escort! Jewels was known all across gay America for there FULLMOON Parties.  Every full moon no matter what day of the week the bar had one perverted anything goes hedonistic party in the bar.  There are stories the second floor Pool Tables at Jewels had tarps thrown over the pool tabless ay fullmoon parties and Crisco would cover every inch of those tarps by morning.  Jewels in the French Quarter was our rough trade bar of the likes seen in the movie CRUSING (1980) staring Al Pachino, this kind of bar.  (( I'm always amazed Al Pachino appearred in Crusing ) ) Jewels didn't disappoint it was everything I thought and more.  The enterance to the bar was 2 swinging bar saloon doors. I had passed  those door many times going  to Morning Call for hot beignets and coffee  always respectful of Jewels reputation.  Steve went into Jewels first and I wasn't more than 1 foot inside that I saw naked bodies and various forms of sex.  Steve was a regular so after a few minutes I was on my own but I had gone inside for my first time.   What I want to share is I had an epiphany on Mardi Gras Day 1980.   I had been in Jewels about 10 minutes and I had to pee.  The bathroom was in the very back right of the bar.  I went into the bathroom and looked around and there wasn't a urinal, there was a small cubical that had a toilet but NO URINAL.  There was instead a 4 claw old fashion bathtub with a naked guy inside.  I realized the bathtub was the urinal.  I pulled my dick out and let loose a long piss directly onto the naked guy in the bathtub/urinal.  The epiphany was the GLOW, SMILE, PLEASURE, that radiated from the guy, I just pissed on.  He looked at me with complete happiness I have never seem such total happiness before.  He grabbed a roll of theater tickets ripped of a bunch and told me that they were good for free beers at the bar and to hurry on back. I was a changed man since that experience.  I learned if you enjoy it and it doesn't hurt others do it.  Enjoy it what ever it is for you, don't question why, embrace these moments and experiences when you live out your fantasies into reality that is true fulfillment.  You only live once. FOOTNOTE    I got another cool story about Jewels that involved a,   Female to Male Crossdreser.  This women when dressed as a man, looked more butch, than most of the guys in any bar. FOOTNOTE  The House of the Rising Sun referenced in the Animals song is in the French Quarter and I got another interesting experience to tell about that place .....ITS TRUE ITS the RUIN OF MANY A POOR BOY, I KNOW I'm One. Sir Hugo Atlanta   (Formerly known as Sir Hugo of New Orleans)   

The Harem BitchPeople have been asking rather pointed questions about the dynamics of my lifestyle. Tonight we talk about the bitch. Now it needs to be said that while I'm describing a particular event, this happens all the time in many different ways. The room is dark and there's a fan going. In the middle of the room is my massive 4 poster bed (beautiful to look at, bad for bondage), and beside that on the floor is a small thin mattress. On that mattress is a girl who's been hogtied with soft silk scarves. This one I've named bambi. She's blindfolded, and the fan generates enough noise that she can't hear what’s going on in the next room. Being the bitch of my harem, she's used to this and waits patiently for whatever I have planned. On the other side of the bedroom door the scene is quite different. It’s brightly lit, my other slaves are laughing, a movie is playing, and puppy (my jewel) is snuggled up next to my feet on her dog bed. I lean down and whisper instructions into her ear, and she grins ear to ear. "Yes Master!" she says as she pops up, startling her 'sisters'. They look at me for an explanation, which I don't give. I own them, I don't need to explain. Plus they'll have their fun shortly. Puppy slips into the dark bedroom. Wandering over to bambi, she orders her to roll over. My puppy can be a bit of a sadist when allowed, so she relishes watching this girl struggle to get into the position she was told to. Bambi complies quickly, and before she can get completely settled puppy suddenly drops into a squat onto bambi's face and grabs a fistful of bambi's hair, forcing her face into puppy's pussy. Bambi lets out a noise of surprise, but knowing her place, obediently begins to lick. She's come a long way from when I got her. When I first found bambi, the only pussy she'd ever seen was her own. Now as puppy rides her face, gyrating down, bambi expertly licks and flicks, suckles and tongues. Puppy's moans grow loud enough to be heard from the living room, bambi's hands struggle against the scarves binding them to her ankles involuntarily. Finally, I hear screams mixed with barking, the noises puppy makes when she cums, and all is quiet. I smile at the rest of my little harem, their eyes now fixed on me in a "IS IT MY TURN YET?!" sort of way. Then the moans from the bedroom begin again. Poor little bambi is going to make each of my group cum twice tonight.... After more barking and screaming, a sweaty, beaming, smiling puppy turns up in the doorway. "thank you master!" she says with excitement. Kitten goes in next, followed by princess, their moans and screams echoing as they take their turns on bambi, each one of them appearing in the doorway with that same satisfied, excited smile. But we can't forget about the poor bitch, now can we? Puppy goes back in first now wearing her strapon. These things aren't your normal dildo on a harness, I got the good gspot kind. Bambi, still blindfolded and still in the dark is rolled onto her stomach with her ass high in the air. It needs to be said that puppy LOVES her strapon. She LOVES the power it gives her over the other girl, and the shriek that comes out of bambi that I hear all the way from my comfy chair tells me that puppy is definitely enjoying it tonight. The bitch is a very vocal girl, and my puppy is pounding her with some power. Given permission to let bambi cum once, puppy draws it out, edging her, making her beg, then denying her before starting over again. After about 15 minutes, you hear puppy yelling at the "dumb lesbian slut" to cum. Above puppy's shouting degrading comments, you hear a desperate scream from bambi, followed by silence. Kitten starts to bounce at my feet with excitement, now wearing her strapon, and puppy appears in the doorway again wearing an evil smile. Ah, that girl. As I draw princess's face into my lap to suck my cock, I send kitten in. Kitten uses a little more finesse than puppy. My kitten is naturally bi and enjoys the sensuality of fucking bambi. You hear a much more skillful approach, rather than the raw power puppy used, and bambi's moans raise and lower accordingly. Eventually, bambi is allowed to cum, and kitten lays with her for just a minute. It isn't time for aftercare yet, but I allow her to comfort the bitch for a moment. Princess's mouth is replaced on my dick by puppy's, and I send her in. Princess, like puppy, isn't bi. But she loves the power she feels when dominating with a strapon. Her approach is purely mechanical. Hard, but not too hard, and unrelenting. Bambi begs to cum and is repeatedly told no, but princess's thrusts don't change. Wham, wham, wham, wham, over and over and over and over. Desperation creeps into bambi's voice, princess just holds her look of intense concentration. More begging from bambi, more denial from princess. Then finally after an eternity princess calmly says "Okay do it", and bambi lets out another scream as a powerful orgasm washes over her. Princess, very matter of factly, simply stands up and walks off, ripping the strapon out of bambi as she goes. Bambi just lays there panting and recovering for a few minutes, before she feels my very familiar footsteps. I'm 6'4, 260lbs. Its easy to tell my footsteps apart. I have large hands that wrap around the back of her head and grip a massive handful of hair. She gives a small yelp as she's hauled to her knees but opens her mouth as wide as she can. I remove her blindfold and look down into her blue eyes. I can tell in the very dim light that she's begging me to be gentle.....Its almost like she knows what's coming. I love to hear her choke, shoving my cock into her throat repeatedly, giving her a moment to recover, then fucking her face more. Her eyes are squeezed tight shut, the sounds of her struggling echoing out into the living room where my bitches bask in the noises. My thrusts grow faster, her gasps and chokes become louder before finally i shove my balls all the way up to her chin, her nose buried in the skin above my dick, and release down her throat. When she begins to retch, I let her fall to the ground. She pants and composes herself, laying on that little mattress, and I gently begin removing the scarves. she lays there limply for a moment as I gather her up into my bed, before she throws her arms around me and buries her face in my chest. "you're a good girl, you did well" I croon in her ear, and she buries deeper. After she's recovered, she spends the rest of the evening out in the living room with her sisters. They've showered her, gotten her freshened up, and she's snuggling with one, then the other, crawling back and forth like a pet with a big family. She has a huge smile on her face, and is loving the attention. So, what exactly IS a bitch and how do they wind up here? Excellent question. So glad you asked. Contrary to popular opinion, being the bitch isn't simply the starting point in my harem. Put quite simply, a bitch born to be a slave. When I say that, I mean they really haven't gone anywhere in life. Failure after failure in relationships, dead end jobs. This particular girl couldn't hold a job because "mean customers made her cry". Kitten and princess are both gainfully employed as managers. Puppy manages my schedule and manages my harem (more on that in another article). Bitches are the girls who are always one paycheck away from starvation, and one angry relative away from living on the street. In me they find a place where they don't need to be strong, they simply need to serve. Sooo they're the house pets. No job necessary, their days are full of domestic chores. Cleaning, doing their sisters laundry, taking tasks and directions. They are trained for sex and sexual activities to be the center of their lives. While we all love sex, it isn't the center of our lives. I have my businesses, kitten has work and

Hi there, I'm a 26-year-old submissive bi-sexual girly woman who is into BDSM. I'm currently looking for a long-term live-in relationship with someone who shares my interests and desires.   As a naturally submissive woman, I am eager to explore and learn about the dynamics of a submissive-dominate relationship. I am interested in experiencing the various ects of BDSM and exploring my own limits in a safe and respectful manner.   Ideally, I'm looking for a partner who is also bi-sexual and open to a polyamorous relationship. I believe in open and honest communication, and I value trust and respect above all else in a relationship.   When it comes to my dressing style, I love to wear feminine and flirty outfits that accentuate my curves. I'm a big fan of dresses, skirts, and high heels. I enjoy experimenting with different colors, patterns, and textures to create a unique and eye-catching look.   In terms of shoes, I have a particular fondness for high heels. I love the way they make me feel, and I find them to be both elegant and sexy. I have quite a collection of heels in different styles and colors, ranging from classic pumps to strappy sandals to chunky platform heels.   Of course, I also have a variety of other shoes for different occasions, such as flats, boots, and sneakers. But when it comes to dressing up, you can usually find me in a pair of sky-high heels that make me feel confident and glamorous.   As a submissive girl, I have had a range of experiences exploring my submissive side in BDSM relationships. I find that submitting to a dominant partner allows me to let go of control and experience a deep sense of trust and surrender.   In my previous relationships, I have explored a variety of BDSM practices, such as bondage, impact play, and power exchange dynamics. I enjoy experimenting with new techniques and pushing my limits in a safe and consensual way.   I have found that communication and trust are essential components of a healthy and fulfilling BDSM relationship. Open and honest communication allows me to express my desires and limits, while trust enables me to fully surrender to my dominant partner.   Overall, my experience as a submissive girl has been both challenging and rewarding. It has allowed me to explore new ects of my sexuality and develop a deeper understanding of my own desires and boundaries.   If you're interested in getting to know me and exploring our shared interests together, please feel free to connect with me. I'm excited to see where this journey takes us!  

I’ve been looking at what fills my messages lately—and I have questions. Too many hollow approaches. No restraint. No awareness. No sense of tone. Just presence without purpose. And I don’t believe that happens in isolation. So I’ll ask it directly— What are you cultivating? Because the men arriving in my space reflect the environments they’ve been allowed to exist in. If they lack restraint, if they lack discipline, if they don’t understand how to approach with intention… that didn’t come from nowhere. That was permitted. Reinforced. Played with. And I’m not interested in inheriting the result of that. There’s a difference between engaging and indulging. If you that line long enough, you create men who don’t know how to regulate themselves. Who think access is casual. Who mistake attention for acceptance. And then they arrive… unrefined. I find that disappointing. Because the standard, for me, has always been clear. The men—and women—who serve me operate at a different level. There is restraint. There is awareness. There is composure. I don’t lower myself to meet chaos. And I don’t invest in weakness. So this is a challenge as much as it is a statement— Be honest about what you’re building. Be intentional about what you encourage. Because what you allow will always show up somewhere. And right now… it’s showing up in my messages. — Mistress Nikki Vixen

  PSA FOR YOU TEXT-WARRIOR, NO-ACTION “SUBS” Let’s make this real clear ‘cause some of y’all slow: this ain’t no slap-n-tickle daycare, and I ain’t your lil fantasy pen-pal. I see way too many of you running your mouth about “devotion” and “service,” but your actions stay ghost like rent day. Y’all been out here trained by hobby dommes handing out fake titles like raffle tickets! Oh congrats, you learned how to kneel for selfies and type “yes, mistress” with your thumbs. Cute. But let me remind you...I am NOT the one to play them baby games with. Let’s cut the bullshit: If your “service” starts with your nut in mind, you already disqualified. If your follow-through weaker than your WiFi signal...don’t step to me. If all you bring is paragraphs, emojis, and zero execution. You can consider yourself pre-blocked in spirit. I don’t do needy. I don’t do text pets. I don’t do “maybe later.” You get one lane and one chance: service with backbone, obedience without your ego hangin’ out, and movement I don’t gotta chase you for. Miss that lane? Cool! Your exit is already waiting with the engine running. I don’t do reindeer games. You either show up in discipline, readiness, and action, or you get shown the exit with extreme swiftness and silence.   This is not a cuddle corner for your kink curiosity. This is service with spine, obedience with precision, and presence without ego. If that sounds like too much for you, good! Go stay in the shallow end where the slap-n-tickle Dominants will praise you for a "Yes, Mistress."   This ain’t Fetlife cosplay. This is Pegstress territory! If that’s too grown for you, go back to the hobby dommes who clap for you just for showing up breathing. I’m not arguing with no sub who can’t execute. I don’t repeat myself... I'll just replace you.

my first entry since i created my account.   Its only a thinking about how much difficult to have a relationship with a person, normally its already difficult with vanilla, because you have the choice of saying your "truly desire" or just lie, like a lot of other kinkster. I did the first because i dont like to lie, trust is important, even if after this will be difficult. Then if youre lucky like me your vanilla romance can be transformed into a kinky romance. But ahaha, luck with me came only in half, she liked the kinky community but shes a dom and.. im a dom. Then having sub, slave and partner play came really fast to us, but the problem is...  I can releave my desire of spanking, doing general sadism, experiments this with her with complicity but.. Sexual desire, humiliation, degradation and dicipline/domination i can't! because both of us are dom! If the person beside you is a kinky person this can be helped but if that not the case, youre doomed! After 8 years of relationship, we will broke, not because we dont love each others but because of the path we need to take separatly. Being a kinkster if you didnt find a person to walk with you at this long life and with the same desire, same way of living, some time this will broke or you will broke. make the good choice, and assume it. only like this you will never regret it. 

Is there anything else I can help you with? You never know when bdsm enters your life in the vanilla world.  I really enjoyed living in SW Florida.  I used to live in Cape Coral which is a suburb of Fort Myers , a much bigger city where I worked.  On days off I would go to the nearby beaches of Ft.Myers, Sanibel Island or other places to sunbathe and swim.  There was a yacht club nearby where I went a lot to lay out and preen in the bright sun.  Guys would whistle at me as they moved along in their boats and I would smile.   Between my house and the yacht club near the corner of Cape Coral Parkway and Coronado Parkway was a bikini shop located in a small strip mall.  I would go in there to look at their bathing suits from time to time.  I bought a few bikinis from them.  I think it was the third or fourth time I went there that I realized they also sold adult toys.  It never occurred to me to look around the entire store when I was there.  I'd go in and head straight to the swimsuits and the dressing room and the cashier area.   Had I looked, there was a wall that separated the clothes from the toys.  I just never looked.  There were vibes, lubes and other sex toys displayed on the wall that was out of sight from the rest of the store.   On the way back from the yacht club I stopped at the store.  I was wearing a crop top and bikini bottoms at the time.  This was normal for Floridians to be dressed this way.  I bought a bikini one time and went to pay for it.  It was then that I noticed for the first time that underneath the glass counter was a whole selection of restraints and other bondage items.  I glanced at them while I waited for the owner to come to the register.  She was a tall BBW, about 50 and had long red hair.   Owner:  Anything else sweetie? Smiling Me:  I never noticed before that you sold bondage stuff.  I usually just bought bikinis here.   O:  Is there anything you want to see?  M:  Yes, I'd like to see those suspension cuffs and that spreader bar.   She reached under the glass case and brought out the cuffs and the bar.  The cuffs were very nice.  The leather was thick and the buckle was sturdy.  It was the spreader bar I wasn't too sure about.  It was made of wood and had eyebolts on either end.  It was about three feet long.   M:  This doesn't look very sturdy, at least for suspension.  Do you sell metal ones? O:  You're about 120 pounds right?  It'll hold you up.  I'm sure of it.  M:  Hmm I don't know.  I like the cuffs and I want a spreader bar but I'm not sure a wooden one would do the trick.   I was kind of embarrassed having this conversation in this store but when I looked around nobody was there but us at the time.  O:  Look, I can have you try it out in the back room if you want.  I can hook you up and you can see how it feels.  She pointed to the back room behind a curtain near the adult area. I looked at the area where she pointed and thought, well if this is a trick I can at least yell out to anyone who comes into the store.  I looked at her again and thought, well she doesn't look like a serial killer.   M:  Ok. She led me past the curtain and it was just a plain ok storeroom with boxes and shelving units and clothes racks.  There was a chain hanging from the rafter in the ceiling that hung in an open area underneath a sky light.  I put on the cuffs and she attached them to the ends of the spreader bar.  She told me to stand on a chair and she attached the bar to the chain.   O:  Ok step off the chair.   I stepped off and hung there while she pulled away the chair.  She smiled as she looked at me.  O:  How does it feel?  Try moving a bit.   I wiggled around and the bar held my weight.  I was about to say something when we heard the door chimes.   O:  Oh shit a customer.  Be right back.   She left me hanging there alone in the stockroom.  I could hear her talking to the customer.  There was a bit of back and forth.  She was gone for only a minute or two.  She came back and peeked at me through the curtains.   O:  Are you ok? I nodded yes.  She went back to front and I could hear more talking.  Finally after a few minutes I heard the door chimes again.  She came back and smiled at my suspended body.   O:  I'm so sorry.  You look amazing by the way.   She got the chair and helped me down.  She helped me remove the cuffs and we went back to the front together.  It took me a few moments to comprehend just what happened.  I just did a suspension scene in a bikini store!   O:  Is there anything else I can help you with?   M:  No, I'll put it on my credit card.    

Just for fun!   There is a lovely toilet in TX that has Me wiggling My toes for joy of them being licked clean!  lol  I know it is not everyone's thing, but I have nice toes and they SOOOOOOOOOOO love to be licked.  Mayhaps I shall start with the list of likes for yall to drool or ewww over!  lol   Number 1:  Likes to have feet washed and massaged and licked and sucked!  My toes delight in pampering.  Yum!

A little poetry?  Sure, why not.   In realms where love unfolds its gentle sway, A man finds bliss in night and sunlit day. Within the dance of hearts, a truth revealed, In female-led embrace, his joy's congealed.   Beneath her gaze, a beacon burning bright, He revels in the tender, guiding light. Her strength, a fortress that he gladly seeks, In every whispered word, the solace speaks.   No tyranny, but harmony they find, A partnership where hearts and souls entwined. He cherishes the power she bestows, A union blossoms, like a fragrant rose.   Her laughter, like a melody divine, Resounds within his heart, a sweet design. Together, they traverse life's winding road, In tandem, love's enchanting episode.   She leads with grace, a compass sure and true, He finds his purpose in her eyes of blue. Her wisdom shapes their journey through the years, A symphony of joy, dispelling fears.   He revels in the kindness she bestows, Her love, a river, steadily it flows. He willingly surrenders to her care, In tender moments, love is everywhere.   No shackles bind, but freedoms they unfold, In her embrace, a sanctuary bold. A partnership where balance finds its place, He celebrates the joys of her embrace.   In shared delight, their spirits intertwined, He savors every moment, love defined. A male perspective on this blessed path, In her-led love, he finds eternal warmth.  

Protocol Party Ideas   Low Protocols that are public-friendly.• sub refills the Doms drink.• sub not sitting until the Dom sits• serving the Dom before the sub.• sub not eating until the Dom starts• etc. Medium Protocols are usually seen at kink parties.• sub sitting on floor next to the Dom.• sub saying yes Sir/Maam.• any type of service including play. etc. Then there are High Protocols. These are actions the sub is not to question. They are done quickly and respectfully.• sub is not allowed to speak.• sub can't look into Dom's eyes.• sub stands at attention.• sub walks behind the Dom.• sub obeys all orders.• etc. These are just a few examples of protocols. When beginning to use protocols remember to start slow. Try one or two to begin with and discuss whether they are working or not. It is very gratifying when protocols are used. The sub is pleasing the Dom and the Dom is proud/pleased with the sub. Now that's a turn on. 😁

Master's WritingsDo We Force or Do We Cultivate Submission?As Dominants, do we take or do we nurture? Do we force or do we cultivate? Do we allow for discovery and awareness or do we force a submissive to become the vision of submission we held in our minds before even meeting them?Nearly every Dominant I have ever talked to has a fantasy or a story about "taking" a submissive. We hold an ideal in our mind of what a submissive should be like, act like and perhaps even sound like. But do we truly, as Dominants, cultivate a submissive to find their own unique, natural path to their truest self?I believe in guiding a submissive, there is an easy road and a hard road. And like all things the harder road will always produce the richest results. The easy way is to take, force, and command them to fit into a predefined mold. For a skilled Dominant, grooming a submissive this way may be swift, but shallow, suitable for play, but not for a lasting dynamic.The only submission I find worthy of my time and energies, is one that is freely given, honest and genuine, where the submissive understands why they have chosen to submit. I find there are several critical aspaspects that are always part of this "harder" and, what I believe to be, a more fulfilling road. Though it might sound manipulative, it is not when done openly and honestly with the purest of intentions toward your submissive.Understanding: One cannot dominate another without knowing the person. One must understand the individual, both the vanilla and the kink. You should spend time to get to know how they think, what they believe, and the motivations behind them all. Share freely of yourself as well to create mutual understanding and build trust. Seek to discover the things that have shaped their life, brought them to the lifestyle - fears, joys, struggles, and fantasies. Each truth either of you share, unlocks a clue about how best to bring them out of their shell and open them up.Engage the mind before the body: The lifestyle and all its kink, when done right, will always be vastly more mental than physical. So many of the things we do here require deep trust, openness, and communication. I know you have heard this all before, but have you thought about what cultivates such trust? It is the mental closeness that comes from sharing, talking, connecting, explaining, and engaging in ways that are respectful of the thinking being standing in front of you, and generous in the giving of yourself. It is the understanding of how a mind works that reveals their blocks, their turn-ons, their fears, and the past damage that continue to color their present self, for good and for bad. As Dominant, be inquisitive of what takes place between their ears, not just between their legs and always engage the mind before you touch the body.Cultivate their awareness of self: In order for any of us to participate fully in the lifestyle, one must have an awareness of who we are, what we want, and why we want it. Few have taken the time to fully explore this in a meaningful way. If you have not, I encourage you to do this for yourself. Ask at least 3 why's after ever truth you think you have uncovered. Dig, explore and be curious. Don't be satisfied with superficial awareness but strive for the hidden understanding behind each “why”. Then when you have a better understanding of yourself, help your submissive explore in this same way. No judgment, no shame, no allowance for them to become self conscious or hide from a hard truth (of course in a supportive and respectful way that allows us all to share in our own time - some truths are really hard to share). Remain open, honest and welcoming. Create a safe place for them to share all with you. Don't lead or channel them to a specific place but allow the discovery to be organic. There is beauty in watching a flower unfold on its own. Question, reflect, explore and require total honesty as you go deeper. Only in this way can you guide them to an awareness of their most authentic self.Build confidence: Few dominants speak of the power of a submissive. I find that there is enormous power in the confidence and submission of an submissive. To know your most authentic and natural self is one of the highest forms of enlightenment I can think of. As a Dominant, I see it as our job to build that confidence, not break them down.It has been my experience that as you begin working on this fourth aspect, all of the work you have done comes together to provide you a depth of overall understanding of your submissive and quite frankly, they will, and should, understand you as well. I have always seen the yin and yang of D/s and M/s relationships being a growing together rather than a forcing to comply or taking of a submissive. There is no sweeter fruit than the fruit that is given freely and for an s to give themself freely, without reservation to a Dominant who truly "knows them" is priceless beyond compare. Once you have tasted such fruit, I doubt you will ever settle for less.A word of caution: This is powerful guidance, and not to be engaged in lightly. We do not use this for manipulation or deceit. We engage openly and honestly in order to seek the same in our partners. If you, yourself, are not yet ready to be fully open with your partner, please do not attempt this, you will only cause pain and emotional harm when you cannot reciprocate the openness that you have worked to create.For those on both sides of the slash, I wish you understanding and beauty and hope this helps in some small way in your life.

How to find a Female Dominant aka Domme/Mistress? (Helpful hints for male subs) The first thing you should realize is that it is going to take time. Do not rush it or be inpatient. Dominant women are much sought after and will be very very picky. You have a lot of competition. So, what can you do to make yourself stand out? Know thyself! What do you need from a D/s relationship? Are you a service sub? Keep an open mind but know your hard limits. If you are new and inexperienced then state you do not know your limits yet. A Dominant will doubt your sincerity if you say you are a no limits sub. Examine what you can offer a FemDom. What skills to you posses?  Are you a good cook? Learn the art of massage perhaps. Have a variety of interests. Be well read. Brush up your conversation skills. Also, your personality and the ability to stimulate a Dominant's mind will get you further than your cock Appearance is important. You do not have to be an Adonis but take pride in yourself. Be well groomed with clean clothes and good hygiene. Improve your level of fitness. It takes a lot of energy and physical strength to be bound for example. Stand up straight, walk tall, and be proud that you are submissive.  Devotion and loyalty are a must. You must demonstrate that you can be loyal to HER. You are not hitting on every FemDom in the room. It is incredibly sexy for a man to openly express his devotion especially through body language. Are you standing at her side but looking at others? Being a slut to any FemDom is not respectful. Being her own personal slut alone is perfect. Have some self-respect. Confidence is sexy. You can be confident and submissive. Who wants someone who thinks they are worthless. Know that you have value! That your submission is a gift that you do not bestow willy nilly. It makes it more special and interesting to the Dominant. Learn about service. Not sexual service. Be prepared to do things for her that have nothing to do with your kink. Offer to help make life easier for her. Run errands for her. You can clean up her house or mow her lawn without having to be naked or wear a maid's outfit. Get involved in your local BDSM community. It shows you take the life seriously. You are trying to experience it first hand. Make friends in the community so that you have a support system as well. You may not meet your dream FemDom right away but the friends you make may introduce you to others Your profile needs to be a representation of you. Remember you never get another chance to make a first impression! Spell check, spell check, and spell check! Punctuation and proper grammar go a long way. Avoid text speak. Be concise but at least a few paragraphs about you as a person (not just as sub). List your main fetishes and dislikes in other words keep it simple. Enough to pique interest but not so much as to bore the Dominant to tears. Quotes that are reflective of you or your beliefs are interesting. A nice picture is worth a thousand words truly. No cock shots. If a Female Dominant wants to see your cock then she will ask.

(There is apparently a way to actually change the entire background color of a post: I have seen other users do it. All I can figure out to do is to use a different color "highlighter" to contrast against the font color. I guess it is essentally the same thing, but dang.) I got contacted by a man on FetLife who fits so many of my criteria that I'm actually tempted: lives one city over within 7 years of my age in an open relationship (he's separated ad casually dating) has a car He already has some chastity devices, and we have overlapping interests. We're sizing each other up, but he sounds eager to meet. eeeee!My only concern is his interest in "intox play," which Urban Dictionary defines as: short for intoxication play, It is a type of BDSM scene where one or both partners get intoxicated and have consensual sex. I put that one down as a hard limit: it's too easy to forget important things like negotiating safe-signals before someone is tied up and gagged. Not *cough* that I'd have any direct experience with that. *ahem* However, we have plans for a coffee date this week, so here's hoping. However, since the pandemic it's not like I've been a social butterfly, so if nothing else I'll get points for making the effort.  

COCKSUCKERS PLEDGEby Jeremy C. Turnbull - As a Cocksucker, I realize that my place is at the feet of my Feeder; that my sexual fulfillment depends on the pleasure I give my Feeder, and his generosity allows me to gain nourishment from him. - As a Cocksucker, I realize that my only real sexual organs are my mouth, tongue, and throat; that my only need is to pleasure my Feeder. When I am at my true place between his legs, I have no need other than this.- As a Cocksucker, I solemnly vow, without hesitation or regret, to possess a willing mouth; to know I belong on my knees in the presence of a true Feeder; to accept my Feeder’s milk, his nourishment, his cum, in any manner my Feeder requires; to give my Feeder my best, because this is what he deserves for allowing me to nourish myself. - Furthermore, I vow to maintain such focus on his cock and his pleasure that it becomes the center of my universe; to suck, swallow, gag, stroke and choke when he expaspects it from me; to learn when he needs me to suck, swallow, gag, stroke, and choke without having him to tell me. - By this solemn pledge, I accept my place in the world; I love and embrace being a Cocksucker, as this is the only way I can perform to my Feeder’s satisfaction. I swear to make my Feeder moan. I accept that my Feeder is allowed to say whatever he wants or call me whatever he wants while I am pleasuring him. - I agree to show my addiction and need for my Feeder’s cock and cum by begging for it if need be, because a Cocksucker has no pride, he is a slave. I agree, obviously, to make my mouth a willing and anxious hole for my Feeder’s nourishing seed. And to be ready for my Feeder at any time, or multiple times. - It is my duty to learn every nuance of my Feeder’s cock and what pleasures him the most. I accept not to bite unless my Feeder desires it. I agree to surrender to deep throating, to face-fucking, to multiple cocks and being roughly used. I will never stop until my Feeder is finished with me and truly satisfied In conclusion, as a cocksucker, my sexual identity is tied to the cock of another Man. I know that in life I will only achieve fulfillment through the graciousness and charity of my Feeder and hereby vow with all sincerity to service my Feeder to the best of my ability and strive to improve my technique. The consequences in breaking this contract will result in my spiritual, sexual and physical starvation.

  Obedience Rituals for a kajira.   A kajira must be obedient and pleasing. She has many ways to assure her master. The obedience rituals provide a striking set of actions that every kajira must master. First Obedience The girl presents herself before her master who has commanded first obedience. She kneels before her master with her hands on the floor. Next the kajira rubs her cheeks and hair on her master’s feet. While attending to her master, the girl must tell her master how much she loves being his slave and how much she loves him. She continues pleasuring her master while pleading that she only wants to be his kajira, his pleasure slave. When the master signals that she has met his needs she must remain in position for other commands such as Second Obedience. Second Obedience The kajira remains kneeling with her hair on her master’s feet. She begins kissing his feet and telling him what sexual favors she will provide. How long and how many desires she uncovers is up to her. She may also plead for sex acts that she needs and wants. The more detailed and complete the better. The master will let her know when she has fulfilled her duties, usually by being ordered to Nadu position.  

i am pretty sure he's done with me.  No idea how I'm going to get through this feeling of failure.  I don't think I possess the ability to move on.  He owns every part of me. My thoughts are wrapped around him, our interactions, our love.  I don't surrender temporarily. I don't quit just because things get hard. I never have.  But somehow I'm supposed to quit him? Quit us? And just carry on? The very thought is viscerally painful.  I miss him. He still won't talk to me. Not even to tell me one way or the other.  On FetLife he's still listed on my profile. I suggested he remove it if he was done with me, that it would give him a way of telling me without the need for direct contact, if that's what he wanted. He is still listed.  All I know is, it's going to take the death of hope to let him go. 

hii sorry to interupt if we have already been talking and perhaps "planning" on getting together i just felt this is a pretty important piece i must mention generally to anyonoe who visits my profile    first thank you if its ur first time on my profile :) heeehe  repeat offenders i well come anytime i love the attention id love to be ur piece of eye candy Heeehe which  i do got more pics but havent uploaded due to the delay that happens and i cant reallly offord a delay since im using this as my main source to escape ... thank you collarspace ;) please dont disappoint    okk so feminization the process which ive started and learned how much more i enjoy life as so. i began HRT and was shocked on the results and conviced this is exactly who im supposed to be :)  i was scared to fully flourish when i started since ii was still living at home.. mom; her druk dumb fukin BF; and my little borther. you could see why i was intimidated to allow HRT gracefully.... i was on and off of it,id say maybe 4months yes, then 4 months no. then 2 months yes. then 3 months no. then 1 month yes then mile stone; family fell apart.... hurts but they hurt me literally no reason.. i was caught in the crossfire of his drunk ass running outta beer money every week blamed me always went throught my stuff, talked shit about my panties would often throw away my CUTEST jean or the combination of cloths that blended my image so amazingly it would allow anyone; who saw me, immedatly know i was a sissy BUT NOT JUST ANY SISSY ;) --yeah would thow that out. iIt happed A LOT but like twice on my most cuties most amazing look that brought confidence and lust lol. okay so my "familly" offically fell apart about 45 to 65 days ago i think give or take ... it occured in about a two week hostile setting. which i wanted no part of because it originated between THEM!! yes i had nothing to do with it i even stayed away from home for days on end to let them deal with their own bullshit... however, out of the maybe 4-6 days that i did come back, cuz jesus i was tired of being out there! somehow the arguments were about me... saying i dont work i dont pay rent --- like umm excuse me ?? dont pay rent? ------------------------------{{{{oooo i love this song}}}--------  k sorry, where was i     --dont pay rent??? then hand me a bill..... nothing ... repeated bout 4 times and still no bill .. i HAD moneyi just wasnt gonna had it to them so he can turn around and just get more beer...  i did everything expect around the house AND MORE  spacifically to prevent any turmoil since yes i didnt pay rent BUT NOT cuz i couldnt lol ... no bill no rent stupid drunk [[[im sure i got completely off my main point but god i feel so good to vent i dont have anybody right now]]] yes totall off topic if your still reading dang i appreciate your intrest in me lol *blush blush      ok i remember what this topic was supposed to be about lol soo sorry went completey right field.. yes right field cuz im left handed >:P lol    i becan this journal entry cuz i wanted to inform those who have a chance in owning me at the moment their a 3 im considering witch one i just hope will be the right choice  fingers crossed   so this as ALL ABOUT FEMIZATION ohh and the whole artical up there does have a good purpose  When i began taking hormons, the fluxuation of on off onn off if you notice the ended with with 1 month on following a 3 month halt.... if you think about the proceess of my feminity you can picture about where im at in my appearance .... BUT WAIT IM NOT UGLY haha  im not ill thow a pic of me rn or send in a message cuz i dont wanna have to do that waiting period this website impliments uppon profile updates. sooooooo when i finally went back to see my doctor to FINALLY GET MY HORMONS again... stupid governer Desantez signed a bill that took into effect just the day BEFORE my appointment making it SUPER SUPER HARD not just for minors to get gender reassingment medication! my doctor straight up told me no! she will not give me my hormons because xyz...i was planning on getting a 4 month batch after explaining to her i was leaving florida to focus on myself and my tranisition... lol more like to focus on YOU and my transititon heehee ;)   theirs more to this but i chose not to disclose due to risk of prejudgmental dissisions, id say about 93% of you WILL MAKE regardless if you, think ur so mature or what not..   ((lol prejudgmental is that even a word? hahaha idk but sounded good there ;))   ** ooo i just notice my spell check wasnt doing its job... crap im sure when i reread this im gonna have to delete it dammit  enjoy the read and the insite of my current situtaion stay safe out there and masters/mistress/..potentual sissy owners.... [iSeeKu]  

reposting this as I have had several prospaspects ask if I am still looking to collar a slave. The answer is yes but onky one that can function well in a poly leather household. Please read the repost below for more info   Instead of updating the profile and having it be down for months, I am using the journal to note changes.      I have collared a slave and it is serving in My home 24/7/365   I continue to train and develop other slaves that need experience serving, learning protocols, developing pain tolerence or just want to provide pleasure to a Master   I am also looking for a second slave for a poly household. Mine is a Leather Family and I have many friends in the world Leather community. I have a process for evaluating a slave for ownership, if there is interest I can explain further.   The new Dungeon Barn has finally been built. This 3 level dungeon is an all season timber frame barn built on a stone foundation. The interior is being finished and then equipment installed. Completion scheduled for winter 2021.   Summer months We/we reside at our camp. Cothing optional, men only, with a complete dungeon there as well

So slightly better news.  99.9 percent of the people who get this cancer are either heavy smokers, heavy drinkers, or drug users, and have depressed immune symptoms.  Since I am none of those things, my chances of making it out of this alive is closer to 80 percent than 50.  I'll take it.  I go in for surgery next week.  They are cutting out a piece of the back of my tongue, a piece of the back of my throat, and going into the side of my neck and removing all the lymph nodes.  Fortunately, the surgical techniques have advanced a lot and they no longer have to take out all the bones and muscle in my neck along with it.  So I will have a scar on my neck, but won't be grossly disfigured.  I won't be able to eat solid food or talk for a few weeks, and it's still going to be horribly painful, but better than dying.  And hopefully, if they get it all, I won't need to follow up with chemo and radiation and it won't come back.  But this cancer does like to come back.  I will worry about that when it happens.  For now, I'm going to focus on getting through this and keep living my life as best I can.  Thanks to everyone who took the time to write me about their own survival stories, or to offer support.

New year and new beginnings   After becoming active in March, it’s been a slow gradual progress getting back into the scene. I was weary at first due to the past weighing me down and the current situation I was in at the time. Reflecting back to where I was, to where I am now, I've come a long way and ebbing forward in becoming comfortable in my own skin and who I am.   It's been a massive change from no social life to meeting so many Brilliant kinky minded people, I find what was easy for me to interact with people with self-confidence was gone a long time ago, however big thank you to the people that have given me advice and self-belief,(even if I was kicking and screaming) to carry on and not to be discouraged about social situations or setbacks in the things that I do. So, a big thank you to all from me, for helping on my pervy journey.   What do I think back on 2023? Well, my plans and ambition has changed after moving and starting again. From dudgeon hire and Airbnb to just letting things come and go as they will, due to this I've gained so much freedom. Not being tied down finically and mentally that I'm now traveling a lot more than 15 years ago. Finding out and planning to attend old/new munches, clubs, workshops. Planning ahead for meets with people that I met along the way. Working on play Scenes and finally relearning my skills as a practitioner that I thought I lost all so long ago.   You don’t tend to realize, what was taken for granted can be lost or thought lost, I thought so for a long time, still do at times but it's the willingness to draw a line in the sand with yourself, to make a new start in thinking, to carry on consistently in what you're doing and where you're going, that what was lost is just misplaced.   I restarted this journey on my own and now joined with people on their own paths, it can be scary and daunting at times, it can also be exciting and rewarding but there is now one thing constant that I'm thankful for, I'm not on my own on this path anymore and I'm grateful for the close connections people have made with me.   So, taking a step back, what have I achieved? Establishing myself back in NW scene. That was my goal last year, but I've achieved so much more without realizing it. Creating a scene and doming in public display. New techniques in sensory and impact play. I am more proficient with the Violet wand and regaining my self-confidence as a dominant in styles of role play. I've been asked to mentor and accepted; it is a responsibility I take seriously and has helped me retread old ground with my own training from over 20 years ago. And last, somehow (I'm thanking the gods and certain people wile typing this) in the winter after taking up residence at club lash, I'm now Dudgeon Monitoring, I will always feel more comfortable working. It’s helped immensely to quickly orientate myself back as a semi professional in-house dominant and I'm honestly grateful this has happened.   Moving forwards to 2024 I have a firmer grasp of myself and what I am able to do now and what I want to do in the future. There are some projaspects in the works from group activities to self-improvement, some long term other short, but all kink related as I reacquaint myself back more into the lifestyle   My path may have been slow and gradual, but I've come a long way, and can look back knowing I'm on the right path. I still have a long way to go and don’t know if this path will end as new avenues open in 2024, but for now be mindful, live in the present, take stock, give thanks and appreciation in what you have. To stay humble, to stay hungry for the knowledge and opportunities that have been given to you and to always appreciate those meaningful connections that people give you.   2023 thank you   2024 I'm ready... more than i will ever be and I'm looking forward to what comes further down the road

Secret Room "They met, irregularly, at the secret room and at his apartment in the Haight. She had the feet of a ballerina and the temperament of a harpsichord, and she possessed a certain willingness to be cold." -Lindsay Hill, Sea of Hooks    

I'm going to use an anecdote to give a little insight about what I like. It may be a little long but bear with me. I had a Dom/friend, he's in Arkansas now, we met at a party & his then GF was yelling at him & he was yelling at her. Was ruining the vibe so I told her to go upstairs, and took him outside. Went up stairs, chatted with her: She didn't like him talking to other girls. Stupid nagging problems. Went downstairs. Talked to him out in the alley. He didn't like that she slept with his friends when she was mad at him. Which sort of ticked me off. Anyway we chatted and he gave me an out of the blue kiss. Then next day all day sucking/fucking. He liked playing the XBox while getting head. Watching porn and getting head. And having someone to rub his feet, his back. I told him his ex GF was a bitch & the worst kind - the one who sends pics of her fucking to him. He did love her and It made me want to please and make him feel special. I told him he could do whatever he wanted with me. He liked being complimented and thought of. I like his build & personality. He had some kinks like enjoying being rimmed, choking, verbal and I was always open for him when he needed to fuck. I liked it when he sat on my face and made me eat his ass while he relaxed and even when he put his foot in my mouth and had me worship his feet. I enjoyed him being at a desk with me under it, soft cock in my mouth. It'll grow until it was ready to fuck my face then after he came it'll rest in my mouth until he was ready again. We became pretty good friends. Discreet fuck buddies the entire time since the crazy Ex was still around & we both liked no one knowing our business. He moved out to AK closer to family but we both had a great time and I enjoyed being there for him and making him feel like a King. I knew my place, he knew my place and we both knew his place. - 2017

Hello Friends, Thank you for reading my post. A bit about me, I'm 30 years old, a hairy man, and I'm a sucker for snuggles and pampering (my partner). I am an ENFJ and I LOVE to talk about anything and everything, the quirk is, I don't know how to get the conversation going sometimes. I'm painfully honest, and will never sugarcoat my thoughts and opinions, ask a question you will receive an honest answer. When my partner enters my life, whoever she may be, Will become the center of my world, and she will be treated as such. I adore babying and intimacy and get more satisfaction from being together than most. I work 5 days a week as a Sales Associate, for a cell phone company. When I do get my off days, They are spent with whomever I am with 95% of the time, there is going to be the odd occasion where I need to do some things solo since My work requires confidentiality. I am loyal to my core and Monogamous through and through. When I commit I jump in with both feet and will do everything I can to foster a loving and healthy relationship. I'm willing to relocate to my partner or help her relocate to me if she so chooses, but that would be no earlier than 6 months together. If you can tolerate my quirks and oddities for that long, you're well on your way to being wife material. What I am Looking for:Someone willing to commit wholly to me as I would to her.Loyalty and honesty. Integrity and trust, I will bare no secrets from my partner and I would hope she would do the same with me.Willing to relocate is a bonus but not required, I'm okay with an extended long-distance relationship, safety is key after all.Age and Body type are not an issue with me, Kids or not, both are okay with me.I'm looking for a soul mate, and a best friend, someone who will go through this journey of life together. Useful Info about me: I'm Willing to talk about anything and everything, pick something and we will discuss it in detail. Enneagram 6. I like good morning texts and good night texts, I love being in contact with each other even if it's something simple, and I love knowing what is going on in my person's life no matter how silly or irrelevant it may seem. I love knowing my partner's secrets and kinks, and I crave communication, if you're curious about something or want to try something, let's do it! For those that find this info useful:My primary love language is Touch, Secondary is Quality time. I'm an open book and if you're curious about anything about me, I will tell you. Just be brave and ask! I won't bite unless you ask nicely, Most of my kinks and turn-ons can be found on my profile, so explore away.

  To a Man-Bride, do not be fooled by the title there is a special relationship that develops between two men that can only be consummated through phallic worship. One side holds the phallus and the other the vessel where that phallus is to dwell in glory. One is the earth and the other is the plow that opens  it and makes it fertile. Not in the sense of conception but in ideas, attitudes, confidence, and fulfillment.  I've always despised the words sub, and passive because the imply a degree of unworthiness. The one who allows phallus to enter him IS a full and total man; because it takes a man to allow another to enter him and hold him inside and effectively owning that part of the body that makes them equals, the phallus. The glory of a male phallus is the ring of his vessel around it, pulsating, embracing, and forever inviting him deeper then who is the more complete I ask? The vessel owns two phalluses and  because of that becomes twice the man. The experience of he who is entered is dual; on one hand he feel a phallus invading his intimacy but also can and touched outside because he has another phallus outside of his body to experience, savor and reach  fulfillment. Therefore, like a precious object he holds both seeds, his and his partner and becomes fertile by being able to put that experience to good use and walk tall, he has become a man's man. The one who entered him is the channel through which this is achieved and it is not a minor task to bring a fellow man out of his own shadow and into his own light. Nor a master, nor a top, not a controller, but an enablerer.  The role of the phallic union is to elevate both men to achieve their best potential and expand their world. Every time they will unite it will be a process of beautification and the union between those two levels of energies can only be expressed as a bride be cause ones opens willingly and a groom because he enters by his own volition. The phallus is the channel of fulfillment and will work both ways as a heterosexual and as a homosexual (in the ancient ancient aception of the word) process of fulfillment phallus illuminates, guides, centers, and diraspects, that is our destiny.  

  So many people mistake kindness and good manners with weakness.  A worthy submissive needs to be strong, remain committed even at the most testing times but above all remember its manners & place.   

Building an authentic M/s relationship takes time. It starts with conversation. Open and honest about what things mean, experiences, expectations, and more. How else would we determine if we are good for each other. Then, it takes a leap of faith from both of us. I've been surprised by a "slave" who was so rude and so standoffish. I get I am not for everyone just as not everyone will be a good match for Me. But still... kindness is for everyone.  I am not a wannabe. Nor am I just a thirsty boy looking for sex. Sex will be a great part of our dynamic but it's not what drives Me. I've lived this life authentic for many many years. I seek that 24/7 TAT/TPE again.  That likely starts on line and then moves to calls and visits. I am not here to scam you, lead you on, have you send pics, or wank off to you on skype. Not My thing at all. I am old school. you'll always be treated with respect. Being in charge doesn't equate to mean or disrespectful.  Just about every ex or ex play partner will have good things to say about Me. One was a compulsive liar who turned nasty. A few of them would love for Me to collar them again. you will not be disappointed with Me if you are truly seeking a deep D/s or M/s bond and relationship.  I am still in Grand Rapids while I look at places to relocate to. I'll buy a house and settle in wherever that leads Me to. I hope you'll take a leap of faith. MT

Im on a hunt for a few Doms on here, This is a long journal entry, so if you are standing sit down and listen. Let me take you on a trip to memory lane, lol. There were a few Good men on here, One was married he was a truck driver, I believe he was from tenessee. Another? LOL. well he showed to not Judge Poly. Not the way he wanted me to stay. I did my part and he knew that I had to leave because there was a lady that hurt me too far but I never judged him. He was from Des Moines Iowa. There was another from Oregon, He and i didnt see that we fit, but it was thanskgiving, and well he fed me and kept me in his warehouse office. I could walk around frealy because i get the tar spanked out of me if i ran away in a way, hey it was exciting. HAHA. Oh there was another man Alan, even though you did wrong fucker, God bless you and Happy new year. But the good guys., Im looking for you!!!. You know who you are. yep i got a family now. 

A note from me, K.  A bit of a look into our recent goings on. This was a big moment for me and I want to savor it. I had to break it up because it is quite a long entry.    M has been behaving really well lately! Behavior modification and control is my primary interest and all the implements of our lifestyle are just ways of helping me achieve that control. We have had the conversation regarding my desire for cuckolding before, many times. I bring it up quite a bit, I just can't get it out of my head. I need this for me. Back in 2019 M accompanied me on a few dates with potential bulls, but I don't think he ever thought it would seriously happen. This is very different from when I saw submissive clients professionally. I never ever had sex, I never ever gave head, I never even gave hand jobs. If my clients were allowed an orgasm, they would bring themselves off. M knew that when I finally allowed him sexual contact that we had taken a serious step. A premature ejaculator, he was and is a horrible lay and has never got better. I honestly didn’t expect him to. I got off on my control of him and absolute obedience, not his penis. And now while we have probably only had PIV sex 8 or 10 times in the last 3 years, I desire it more than ever, just not from my husband.  The pandemic drove us all inside and away from people we didn't know. The dates with potential bulls ended and I think M figured that was it. But, my desire for a bull has continued steadily building this entire time and has come to a tipping point. I decided to re-engage the subject in one very direct conversation with M last weekend. I have also decided to keep him on a more frequent chastity release schedule as positive reinforcement while we move forward in adjusting to our dynamic and while finding a bull for me again, in earnest. This conversation was for me to lay out my intentions in full.  We had scheduled this conversation for last Saturday a week before so that we would both be ready. We spent the morning at a farmers market searching for fresh produce that M would turn into a delicious dinner while I spent the rest of the day getting a massage and reading in our backyard garden. After dinner I suggested we move to the living room where I sat in the chair that I have for years been using for spankings and directed my husband to sit cross-legged on the floor in front of me. His lack of pants showed me his diaper was soaked and I put his pacifier in so he wouldn't be tempted to speak.  While he was sitting in front of me I explained to him first, that I loved him, that he had done nothing wrong, but that we would be renewing our search for a bull. His immediate reaction was to put his hand to his mouth in an effort to remove the pacifier so he could speak. I leaned forward, caught his hand and told him, “let me finish.” I explained to him that I would also be allowing him a more frequent release schedule from chastity, which drew out a smile behind his pacifier gag. I explained that his new permissions came with new expectations and that it was directly related to, as I put it, "returning to vigorously searching for a bull." His smile faded instantly which breaks my heart, but I have made my decision and know it will be best for us both; our lifestyle dynamic has many places left to go, but this is step one in getting there. I explained gently but firmly that he needed to get used to the idea of there being other men in our lives. I told him that I was completely finished treating him with kid gloves around cuckolding, that this was something I needed that he couldn't provide and that he knew that.  "M...we have come so far. I have emasculated you to a point you know that I could never take you seriously as a sexual partner. You know this and you know I need someone else, don't you?" He again lifts his arm to remove his pacifier gag so that he can speak. "Nope. Just nod your head, baby. Nod your head that you know I need this." 

Things i wounder, Are there any real people left on here ? is Fetlife the place to really connect?  AFF and collace seem full of Wanna be's and people looking for KINK of every sortf  ( not a bad thing ) Just real folks seem hard to find. Read plenty of profiles every week, I find more and more that people are full of doodooo ! I read im a submissive im a slave.. But dont say this to me or i dont do this or ill block you if you say this or are a republican lol . I have been in this lifestyle for over 30 years and it sure has changed ! Maybe I should just go back to normal life. This lifestyle has gone to a new low level and people who post are 80% nieve and dont know what a slave or submissive is ! They know KINK for sure but not how to act or speak as they claim they are !  KINK is about sex and fettishes lifestyle is much more then that ! if your a KINKSTER great !  but please dont caim to me a Slave of Submissive lol say what you want and dont . Politics , Religon much like in bars has no place here ! Just be happy ! 

These things fill my submissive dreams:My partner wants to lead a relationship based on a happy friendship and sharing positive feelings.My partner enjoys using chastity to satisfy her need to possess her lover. She enjoys being center of attention when she wears clothes that men cannot ignore, especially me. She wants a partner who submits to her excitement for taking control physically using locks and keys.She would like to use her man's sexual energy to teach him to obey her. She want license to be persuasive on her terms.She is willing to take time to acknowledge my service with little erotic rewards even when she is tired. Words are enough.She is interested in putting mutual health activities into our shared routines of life for which we are both responsible.I'd be happy to do yoga, massage and connective breathing as our most frequent intimate activities.I enjoy being appreciated for my sexual arousal as a compliment to you at the same time I enjoy being denied sex as sincere submission to you.I'd like to demonstrate my experience with turning arousal in chastity into the intense desire to make you happy in non-sexual ways.I feel loved when locked in chastity but still want to make love when you decide to take it off. Please lock it up when you are done.I want to believe that you require chastity to prevent masturbation so that I stay fully erect when you want me to be.I am enchanted to believe you like chastity because it prevents anyone else from tempting me, that you now own me without question.The chastity does not need to eliminate having sex, but to control when. A woman who blocks male masturbation is never lonely. It is an easy way to encourage a man to give more hugs and better kisses if he is thinking about sex but cannot touch himself anymore.

I'm bewildered by the lack of communication I've noticed many submissives on this site say things like "get in touch", "happy to chat", and "want to learn.." However, many do not even reply. I teach my subs to be open and honest, and that communication is very important in this lifestyle. If for whatever reason a sub thinks I am not what they are looking for, I'd at least expect a reply even just to say, "sorry you're too far from me", or "I'm looking for someone a little younger" etc.  I think that it's still good to chat to different people even if there's no intention to meet or take it further. Especially subs that are new to the scene, surely the more people you talk to, the better informed you'll be, and therefore be able to make better choices when finding a suitable Dom. Obviously I wouldn't expect immediate replies but having a chat and then being ghosted is extremely disrespectful in my opinion, it's not a good start in any potential bdsm relationship. I am sure many Doms or indeed subs, would appreciate feedback of any kind. Sometimes I think that the sub see ONE thing they don't like on my profile and immediately think "no thanks", without even discussing anything. Also, I think some 'subs' don't really know what being a sub entails, I am a very fastidious Dom, I try to train my subs to the best of my ability and expect my sub to be committed to her role. I think some subs just like the fantasy of it all but aren't willing to commit. When I'm selecting a suitable sub, I always have a day session with her first, give her a taste of my methods and explain how she should behave and what is expected of her. There is no commitment either way until after that initial session. That's the end of my little rant. 

Passions of a Ghost Young and energetic MD approaches a stretch of buildings in the Sin City of New Orleans. Risking it all knowing he is outside his perimeter for Max Travel Distance from his military post, but he is dying to know what this new world is about. It is his first party within the lifestyle community with wild fantasies, expectations and fears raging through his mind. Will he be enough? How will he compare? Will he be accepted in a world which rejaspects him for being different? Questions galore which make his palms sweat beyond control. He has a few contacts already within the dungeon having gone through their vetting process. Paperwork signed and face to face meetings had, all that is left is to walk in the door. As he watches the comings and goings he see's Doms, Domme's, subs and slaves walking through a well worn door. Finally pulling himself together he walks in nervously and pays his fee to enter. Around the corner the adventure begins. Furniture of all kinds are found along the walls and in the center of a well laid out dungeon. People are talking amongst themselves, others strung up to crosses for their night's enjoyment, and yet more are preparing for scenes of their own. The energies are immediately felt and a bubbling rise is felt in his chest. As the energies are taken in he comes to understand. He is home. In the coming years this shy little Dom was able to study under some very wise, creative, and often sadistic people of all walks of life. These early days was full of dungeon parties, munches, gatherings of all kinds. There was a code of ethics similar to the military which he knew so well. There was respect. There was courage. There was acceptance. Of course there was love as well. In this community which became my world D types were hard, sadistic, and pushed hard to bring to life the fullest of potential in themselves and their s types. At the same time they still had a heart. If anything they loved their partners far more than ever written in vanilla history. Traveling with the military I traveled the country, but found myself in a different world when he got out after 3 tours overseas. The community had changed. It had evolved into something grander in size, but with so many elements which eroded the values he once knew. He walked those dungeons looking for any resemblance of the community he knew but it was nowhere to be found. Talking with his mentor she couldnt help but laugh at him. He was ranting and raving about the changes which took away the life he knew so well. He was struggling to find his way. He was frustrated how noone held themselves to a standard which made this life so great. He was lost and alone. Even in training with his partners he found them continuously pulled towards this easy shiny way of the life instead of putting in the work and patience required to get to the same level and standard as he needed. His mentor laughed hearing it all before and feeling it herself. She had long since left the community. She felt the changes moreso having come in years before he. She ranted and raved, felt the same frustrations. She battered against those walls trying to bring back those values long before he even felt their demise. After he finally stopped confused by the laughter, her next sentence said it all. "Welcome to the Old Guard" It wasn't anything official or an earning of leathers. It wasn't anything to brag about or label myself as such. It was a pure statement which helped him understand in such a profound way what he had been missing. In all that time he had been looking up like a child letting others take the reigns of the community. He didn't see myself as a leader though having over 12 years in this life at that point. He didn't find himself worthy to take up that mantle yet. After those words were spoken the whole discussion changed from what was lost to how he can be the example for those which feel that absence as deeply as he did. His drive towards mentorship and teaching drove a fire in him which couldn't be extinguished. He stood side by side with those very same leaders he looked up to trying to be that beacon. He started simply teaching rope classes but this also gave him a way to interact with people new and old within the lifestyle. Discussing the issues. Being that rock and safe haven to guide the next generation away from trouble and into a path of greater development. It was a lonely road for nomatter how hard he tried, his equal in passion for this life was nowhere to be found. If anything his role as a teacher and mentor drove him further into isolation. Experience once valued was now seen as a deterrent for many. His age showing more and more became a wall he couldn't tear down. Eventually after personal experiences which nearly crushed his soul, betrayal by the very community he loved and served for so long, he walked away into the shadows. He still had his friends and made the occassional appearances but his heart was held heavy knowing the life he knew was but smokey memories of a long gone era. Now 23 years into this life he found himself down the same road as his mentor before him. Slowly fading away as a ghost of the past. Leathers faded and worn, toys dusty and bearing the years of use, wrinkles where there used to be none, and a sense of passion still burning in his heart he still hangs on to hope. Not for the return of a community once known, but for that one which knows that same level of passion as his own. That one to walk these roads well traveled but once more. That one who he can share his all.  

What annoys me more than anything is people who don't read. I know you're not used to people like me who are straightforward and values every second they have, but get on my level or leave me alone. I created a detailed profile to spare the need to repeat myself or waste valuable time. I know exactly what I want and I know exactly what I don't want. If you lack the cerebral firepower to comprehend an Alpha Fem of my caliber, that's your problem. Don't approach me if you didn't read my profile. Stop expecting me to go out of my way, repeat myself, overexplain, or lift a finger for that matter. I'm SERIOUS. I am seeking the path of least resistance ONLY. My life will be easy breezy no disruptions moving forward.    As a full time artist and creative maker, I support myself 100%. No side jobs, hustles, or schemes. Therefore, come correct or don't come at all. Getting all of these messages from beta men expecting me to go out of my way. If you want your fantasy fulfilled, seek elsewhere. It's ALL ABOUT ME. It's MY WAY OR GET TO STEPPIN. If you don't drive, don't even bother. If you are poor or struggling financially, mentally, emotionally, or physical, skip me. If you can't keep yourself together, aint no way you can add value to my life. I'm grounded. Aware. And capable of continuing ON MY OWN til I find the right ones for the mission. ✌🏽

It's been a quiet couple of months. P had surgery a few months ago and recovery has been slow. That said, I've traveled a few times, especially around the holidays, and that led to some intense fantasies about being captured or coerced away from home. It's absolutely fun to be tied up at home, but it's also fun to think about being snagged from a parking lot with just the most basic ties. Like zipties around my wrists and ankles, a cloth gag secured with tape, my own scarf as a blindfold so I have no idea where I'm being taken. Fighting to get to my cell phone and just as my fumbling fingers manage to pull it out of my bag, the car stops and I'm hauled away to my fate. Maybe my captor sees my phone, forces me to unlock it with my fingertips, and then uses it to document my punishment for trying to escape. Culminating with a photo sent to my husband of my well-used and creampied pussy, with my legs held up to help me conceive. I know the studies are inconclusive but ever since I saw the movie Election, I've been obsessed with the idea of my legs being held back, willingly or otherwise, after a man has cum in me. Or maybe just Matthew Broderick.   A few men have offered to "rescue" me from a life of being knocked up by a Trump supporter. And I have to admit, a lot of the allure was lost for me after the election, and even more after he took office, and even more after unelected gooner Elon Musk started running the government. Maybe I could be a mail order American bride for someone in Australia or Canada. I have no idea how immigration law works in general and especially not for other countries. Maybe someone tricks me and offers to let me stay with them for a few months in a new country, no strings attached. But once I arrive in my new home, I see the guest bedroom has just a mattress with rope laid out on it. I turn to leave and see my benefactor holding my passport and cell phone. He tells me if I want to stay, I better strip down like a good girl, put a ball gag in my mouth, and handcuff myself. Spending the next few months with my legs wrapped around a stranger, hoping other countries allow anchor babies. Trading one form of servitude for another.   What can I say, the body wants what the body wants.

Effective and Transparent Communication  In a Poly house, it is crucial to maintain honesty and open communication with the Master and all other members. This practice is not only ethical but also necessary for the smooth functioning of the household. Honesty is the foundation of trust and mutual understanding in any relationship, and in a Poly house, there are more people involved, making it even more vital to be forthright.  Being open and honest sets the tone for the type of relationship you want to have with the Master. It shows that you are invested in the relationship and committed to making it work. By being transparent, the Master gains a better understanding of your needs, expectations, and boundaries. This understanding forms the basis of a deeper and more meaningful relationship.  Creating an environment where everyone can communicate freely without fear of judgment or retribution is crucial. It allows for a more collaborative and inclusive approach to decision-making within the house, fostering a culture of trust and mutual support. While the Master has the final say, it is crucial to hear the thoughts of all members.  Before joining a Poly house, asking questions is essential to understanding the dynamics and ensuring it is the right fit. It is a significant commitment that requires trust and openness, and clarifying expectations and responsibilities minimizes misunderstandings and conflicts.  In conclusion, effective and transparent communication is essential to creating a healthy and stable relationship in a Poly house. It builds trust, fosters collaboration, and creates a culture of mutual support. Honesty and communication should be embraced by all members of a Poly house.

LongTerm Chastity The waves of denial come and go.There are days when i forget that i am locked up, then a wave of reality hits and the feeling of helplessness and inferiority pound on my psyche.The need to be teased, aroused and denied as others enjoy their sexual freedoms intensifies..i started this journey out of curiosity and now i am overwhelmed with the need to be locked.i have gone back to my original device. It is open and i can keep myself clean without removing it.i am wondering if i should forgo any shaving, thus eliminating any reason for the occasional unlocking.Thoughts of making this permanent and irreversible have entered my mind. It would be easy enough to do: Hex button Stainless Steel screw, a tap, Locktite 266. (Don't forget to round out the Hex hole with a f=drill bit after it is tightly in place, to render the Hex key useless.) .Yes, the thought has crossed my mind..........a few times..

What my submissive nature looks like:   I naturally end up taking care of others better than I take care of myself. I love to maintain a household and provide nourishment and comfort to all who dwell there. I enjoy pampering my partner. I’ve raised a child, I garden, I cook, I fix things and I take pride in a job well done.    Things I’m not so good at… selling myself, making big $$, asking for what I need or making the first move.   I’m sensitive and inquisitive. I care about the world. I’m drawn to ponder the meaning of life. I cherish touch, beauty, intimacy and indulging in carnal delights. I love truth and freedom. I adore feeling wanted, desired and useful to the Feminine. I adore giving pleasure… physical, emotional and mental. I adore receiving pleasure. I enjoy enduring erotic pain for another’s pleasure… and I cherish serving the will of a Goddess. 

advice in seeking a partner  First narrow your search to the kinky community.Dont befriend or date vanilla women.You are wasting your time and theirs.Focus on knowing your self.So many people say they are this or that and seek this or that but when confronted with the reality, change their mind or back away.This makes them look like a game playing phony.Dont go around telling women what you want and what you want from them.Use the Internet to network with face to face local kink community.Attend every function possible.Be your self.Be the person you want people to see.Only when asked, say honestly what you are seeking.Try to make friends with everyone.Not just Dominants.Being friends with an established couple opens more doors than anything else.Dont ask any Dominants to do you, or train you or use you.Dont ask if they know anyone who will do any of the above.Just be you and say you are available. Period.When you become a known and recognized member of your local community anyone interested will come to you.Offer non sexual service if ever the opportunity comes up.Foot rub back rub, maid service etc.Start small. Earn trust.Never lie.Never break a date or be late.Often people test other people with precision details.Like do something or call at a precise moment.If you cant be trusted to follow that instruction, you wont be trusted to follow any other instructions.Be clean.Be polite.Never answer back.If you dont like whats happening excuse your self from the situation without saying anything negative.

      Only locals Im not investing in anyone long distance. No requests, inquiries, small talk. No coffee-low effort meet ups. Stay with your loved ones if you believe anyone here deserves crumbs of your effort to validate the "potential " of your existence.  "How can you make My life better?" Isn't something I am ashamed to ask, request and demand. Slaves and subs expect energy,time,  attention, training, be allowed in My presence and into My world since most are so god damn broke to have their finances or life together.  I pity the Women in your life if your only form of sacrifice and servitude is a humiliation to you to clean or serve domestically- that is the basic, most bare minimum thing you do In your own lives- no depth, no recent photo of yourselve, no negotiating "if it works" -wtf- it's if you fit into My life, add value to it, enhance and make it better. that is the goal. Not how I make yours better since it will by Me simply being in it. That sort of knowledge of who I am in this lifestyle isnt bragging and no, I am not ashamed to put Myself first- this is why I only have energy to focus on successful masculine men( power exchange isn't an exchange if there's no POWER) most subs and slaves here are so god damn selfish. who seek to be applauded and recognixed for small low effort gestures that only benefit them.  tips: Read journals interests and profile before sending messages.you will not be for everyone. Not everyone will be for you. If they have blank page, move on.  Learn more about yourself and who you are in this lifestyle. The foundation in knowing who you are and what’s your purpose and goal will help you find the right person.  If you're a sub or a slave- Is not about you. It’s what you can do for Me/dominants. Hire a pro if you approach with an specific fantas, demand, requirement. Do not submit to just anyone, it can be dangerous for you and the other person- don’t be in a rush.      Nothing personal if I don't message back to everyone, or block you, but I’ve trained and get invested in people over the years- their lives. Someone new that right out of the bat says they are new and don’t even have much; money, time, energy, focus… for Me- doesn’t interest Me. I am very interested in POWER EXCHANGE. No power? you don't have My interest. I am interested in My well being, My stability, all I have attained and accomplished in My professional, businesses and personal life. and I care far too much and get invested way too much with subs and slaves for those who are too comfortable or seek banal superficial connection or a fantasy sexual release.   

 AcadaMay She's Royal CFNM Ladies Tea Party - Saturday 5th July   You may contact me here to reserve your place.  Most alternative events objectify women, but there is one particular event that reverses the rôles. This is the Clothed Female, Naked Male party. CFNM by definition gives the power back!  Ladies of elegance and sophistication are cordially invited to take the opportunity to mingle with their peers whilst sipping their wine and enjoying the entertainment.  Come & join the the AcadaMay CFNM Ladies' Tea Party every month for an afternoon of tea & wine with lashings of decadence. All whilst being served by underlings who will be there solely to serve and cater to our every whim. You will never want to go to a vanilla tea party again!  Ladies, this is your chance to be served by men and objectify them. CFNM includes activities that are not particularly oriented towards female dominance and superiority, but a modicum of humiliation and punishment to the nude men not behaving according to protocol would be expected, nay, encouraged!  Gentlemen, this is your chance to parade yourself in an elegant social setting, to have the opportunity to serve and make yourself compliant to the request of any lady present without demur or backchat. If you wish to have this experience, come and join the ladies for an afternoon of CFNM.

Don't give up my first journal. Hi I'm mistress muse and I am dominant to my wolf.  If there is one thing that being on the scene has taught me, it would be to never give up. I spent so long in fruitless vanilla relationships that although, true, filled with love and all the nice things that people claim to experience in these things it also carried with it a weight. It was like a brick in my chest, a wrong feeling, an alone feeling, a dark hopeless feeling, a sinking if you will. Which in a way was true I was drowning I was drowning in self doubt I was drowning in a sea of misunderstandings and depravity. The love I craved seemed so taboo it almost seemed impossible to obtain. I may have been looking in the wrong places but even kinky people I've known for years on the scene would often look baffled if I piped up some of my perversions. I then met someone I had known in a completely vanilla setting... So vanilla in fact even he hadn't really noticed me before... a friend who knew of his kinks thought we would be quite suited. Looking back now I find it amusing that both him and I scoffed at the idea but Kinky curiosity got the better of us. There was this feeling everytime we spoke... A feeling of understanding... A good feeling... A weightless feeling soon combined with a feeling of want. I wanted this man... I was fucking getting him. On the scene for years he has been known as z3ro (zero) but ladies gents and pets let me tell you this he is anything but a zero so from the very beginning I have refused to use this name for him. He became my Wølf, my alpha bitch, my sub, my friend, my mirror and my PARTNER. I have used this term quite freely in the past but with him it's different. He is my partner in crime he is my play partner he is my intellectual chewing gum. He turns my head and the way my brain works. I never thought it was possible to find someone to just get me and be able to match my sadistic evil streak. To find someone on the same interlectual level as me. For me to find someone just as twisted as me. For this I am grateful and this is why my wisdom(me) for the day is this.... JUST DON'T GIVE UP

Let’s stir the pot a little. For submissives:  When you’re kept denied for days, weeks, months… do you feel closer to your Dominant — or resentful?  Is it still devotion if you’re begging behind their back in secret?  Can someone be truly obedient if their needs are never met?   For Dominants:  Is long-term denial an act of care and control… or a power trip?  Do you believe a sub should suffer quietly, or do you adjust based on their emotional breaking point?  Is giving release a reward, a right, or a trap? 🖤 Bonus question for both sides: Who really suffers more in denial — the one begging or the one refusing?

 quirkylittle4daddy