Alright, let's get down to it. Reasons why you may not get a response: 1. There wasn't time for a sufficient reply.2. I got distracted.3. The message received was generic. 4. The message received was disgusting.5. The message received very much had nothing to do with my profile other than my image or state.6. Your profile is blank.7. I chose not to reply. It's not personal, I don't know you. I'm sure you're fantastic. Your interest does not mean I owe you my time. In a perfect world we would all get a polite rejection, and sometimes that happens. But sometimes we're having a hell of a day and delete is the best option. Or any one of the above reasons. No response is a response. A "revenge" message is a clear picture of your character based on your own assumptions. This almost feels like a rant, but I'm filing it under public service. 

If you want me...Tell me. Don't wait for me to approach you, You may be broken a little bit inside, but you have to start by fixing yourself.. Do not wait for someone to come along and try to fix you. If you cancel our first date because you are afraid of what you can not control, than there will not be a second date. If you want to stick to chatting only, I will think that you probably have no interest in pursuing anything and I will move on. If you pretend not to give a fuck, I will think you really do not give a fuck, and I will move on. If the only way you can show your love is with your legs wide open... Than it probably will not last.. So why try? If you want me, you need to step out of your shadow and insecurities. It won't be easy, but it will be worth it.

Why sub men need to be feminist allies I firmly believe that any submissive man must, obviously, be a feminist. Feminism by definition is the belief that women are human beings with the same rights as any human being. (The idea that feminism is about female supremacy is propaganda created by misogynists to try to argue against women having any rights at all.) That said, submissives routinely insist that women are superior, and FemDom porn is some of the most popular BDSM porn out there. I would hope that to believe that women are superior would require that men first believe that they are equal. One of the biggest complaints I hear from subs is that there just aren't enough Dominant women in the world to go around. There's a very good reason for that. In the book I'm currently writing, I discuss how girls are raised radically different than boys. From our earliest experience, any hint of assertiveness is usually squashed as "bossy" or "aggressive" or "unfeminine" and then later as "bitchy." The terms a "good girl" is defined by are usually submissive, demure words, urging us to be quiet, polite, deferring to the pleasure of adults in general and males specifically. Blanche Black paints a very good picture of this in her Feminism 101 article, and the MetaFilter discussion "Where's My Cut" is literally thousands of women giving examples of how they were crammed into the role of caregiver with strong social, economic and even physical consequences for ing or questioning it. We are programmed from birth to be doormats, and are told we are genetically predisposed to be happy about it. To go from that upbringing to being an assertive adult is a massive undertaking. I know a majority of the women in my life never even realize that they are following roles and rules they never agreed to. It usually takes a huge life event to force that awareness on us, and then years of hard work re-creating our understanding of communication and relationships to learn to stop playing that part and instead to stand up and assert ourselves. To stop allowing others to demand and take and expect, etc, and instead start working toward taking care of ourselves first, demanding equal effort from our partners, being willing to be alone rather than be subjugated. To move into the confidence and self-reliance necessary to dominate ... that's a new world. I'm not talking about becoming a bitch who uses and abuses and negates the feelings and needs of others to get her way. I'm talking about being able to walk away from what doesn't serve us and require a higher level of interaction from anyone who wants to stay in our presence. I'm talking about being unwilling to tolerate poor behavior, from others, or from ourselves. That requires a sea change. A total re-writing of the base code that made us from our first memories. It almost never happens by accident. It almost never comes without great pain and sacrifice. It's almost always worth it. But it's always an uphill battle that never ends, because nearly the entire world we live in is still trying to tell us that we aren't being feminine, or desirable, or kind, if we aren't giving away whatever it whims to want. We are still being told that we'll be alone, that we are bitches or worse, sometimes it brings violence and poverty and suffering, because this world doesn't want women to be assertive, and it doesn't tolerate them being dominant. If you want to have dominant women, you have to start with allowing them equality. Not special privilege. Just the same privilege men have to think what they want, without being told they are failing as females. The same privilege to act for themselves and not just for others. The same choices and freedoms and safetys to exist without being attacked for it. If you want to have dominant women in the world, you have to be a feminist, and moreover, you have to be an ally. Aggressively so, because until feminist men outnumber and overwhelm the rest, you are going to have to counteract the bullshit message the rest are constantly putting out there telling us to SUBMIT! You, submissive male, must be the active agent that makes the safe space for every woman to express her thoughts and feelings and wants and to act on them without recrimination. You will have to stand up to other men, because they don't hear it when we say it. You will have to call out your friends when they catcall or mansplain or talk over a woman or _(insert male domineering behavior here____) to a woman. I'm not saying that every woman you do this for will become a Dominant Woman. I am saying that almost no women can without it, and if nothing else, you can make the first steps in that direction less of a battle for them. Go forth, and create the world that lets us first become people, equal and unencumbered, and Dominant Women will become ever more common, until almost every submissive male that wants one can find one.

People are fascinating. We are a true mix of talents, experiences, complexities, desires, strengths, weaknesses and hope. Relationships are a balancing act of attraction, relation, commonality, goals and ideals. Kink adds an extra layer of intricacy. I see a dichotomy in many profiles on here: the desire to be seen alongside a desire to be enveloped in a new lifestyle.

It was a mixture of arousal, curiosity and his final reassurance that made her mind up. She knew she could say ‘Stop’ and he would, though that could be permanent, it was an instinctive decision that made her move towards the lift and later she realised why she made it. There was a logical progression to it. She was a stubborn person with a rebellious streak and a free will who made her own decisions and didn’t blame others when they went awry. Here she was reigning in her rebellious streak of her own free will and her natural instincts reinforced this. Her stubbornness would make her comply with what she wanted in this regard, even though it seemed counterintuitive.  Now it was a rush to the receptionist’s desk to get a pen, the envelope was already open and had the room number written on it. The contract was one piece of A4 paper and the male receptionist must have seen the bold type headline which stated ‘SUBMISSIVE’S CONTRACT’. She didn’t have time to read it all, her instinct told her that he would not put anything in it that he had not said. And what would be the point as it was a symbolic act, not a contract that could be legally enforced.  She hurried the short distance to the lift; the concierge seemed to have anticipated her need and he had pressed the button, she momentarily wondered if he knew. Once inside she selected the 4th floor. Her heart missed a beat when just before the doors closed a woman stepped into the lift causing the doors to recycle again and they selected the 3rd floor; she knew this would delay her further. She willed the lift to move faster but still almost in two minds about what she was doing, but she wanted to be the decision-maker on this and not subject to an arbitrary cut off due to time. Her pride ensured she used the time to check her hair and lipstick in the mirror as she would not countenance the thought he would not find her attractive.  The lift reached the 4th floor and according to the large sign room 417 was to the right, she almost ran, nearly tripping over her heels on the thick carpet.  The door to room 417 was slightly ajar, and a ‘do not disturb’ sign was hanging on the handle. She stood for a second or two to let her breathing steady, it seemed to take ages for her hand to travel from to the door, her knock was timid and her stomach almost jumped as she heard the noise her hand made.  A firm reply was forthcoming a few seconds later. ‘Come in Joanna’. She swallowed, took a deep breath and gripping the envelope, pushed the door open and whilst trying to look calm she stepped inside and the door closed with an almost imperceptible click.  The room was warm and gently lit from the lamp above the desk he was sitting at. His jacket was over the back of his chair and the few papers he was attending too were lying about.  Nonplussed for a moment she stood there waiting for some sort of guidance, she knew what she had to do but some sort of signal from him seemed essential.  He understood, or knew, and stood before quietly saying, ‘Come here Joanna’. It was about 4 steps and he stood almost impassively as she greeted him properly. Her arms went around his waist and she pressed herself against him until he said that she could stop. This time it seemed natural and gave a moment when she could do something that seemed familiar and that she was in control of. It also served to break some of her tension before she stepped back ready to kneel. Kneeling seemed a strange and almost alien act; she had been on her knees in front of a man before, but then she was in control of him, she forcibly overcame her rebellious streak and found it disappeared almost entirely.  Her eyes cast down she noticed her knees were together, it seemed inappropriate so she moved them further apart. Taking a larger breath she looked down at his feet and with the envelope in both hands, she held it up to him.  He didn’t seem to move for ages, and then he took it from her hands. He checked her signature was on the contract before placing it amongst the other papers on the desk. This was a small action, however, it made her realise that she had voluntarily signed this part of herself over to him. He had taken possession and she was now his.  He turned the chair to face her and sat on it.  She was on her knees only a few feet from a man she had just given her submission to in writing, she was no longer so nervous, it was now anticipation mixed with exhilaration and her senses were alive! She was now free to be what he decided. He leant forward and lifted her chin with his thumb and forefinger, forcing her to look him in the eyes, ‘Joanna, you are now mine’ he said quietly.  After a pause during which he just looked at her he then continued ‘The photography will wait until tomorrow as there are a few matters from earlier today I will address straight away.’ He wasn’t asking for a reply, he told her to stand and rest her elbows on the desk. She was a little taken aback, whilst earlier considering what might happen this evening she thought he might just photograph her. In a way that would be easier to contemplate, she could understand it would be a reasonable first private meeting, however, she knew it would disappoint her.  But now he was going to ‘Address some matters’ and that sounded ominous, it made the butterflies in her stomach come alive again. She did as asked, putting her elbows on the desk. He told her to arch her spine downwards, this meant she was bent over much further than she felt comfortable, it made her bottom more pronounced and her skirt was tighter. Her knees flexed as she tried to contain the nerves generated by her bottom being so vulnerable, he ordered her to straighten her legs and keep them so, as it tightened the skin of her buttocks. What he did next was unexpected, he ran his fingers around her neck gathering her hair into his hand at the nape of her neck. He expertly wound it into a ponytail using a band that must have been around his wrist. She now felt even more vulnerable without the usual shield of hair that would normally surround her face. She nervously moved her weight from one foot to another. He told her to spread her legs wider to shoulder width. She glanced up into the mirror above the desk; she could see him standing a few meters behind her, looking at her in a way few men had done. It was not simple lust, his face was almost impassive, she could see he was comfortable looking at the salacious view she presented.  His voice was calm as he told her that she had been disobedient when she broke away from the greeting before she had been told she could, she had also been demanding in their early email exchanges. For these, she was going to have her bottom spanked, he said it would be a ‘cumulative dozen’ and if she made any of these mistakes again it would be a stricter punishment.  He told her to raise her skirt over her back, this unnerved her more, it was one thing to have her skirt lifted, but another to do it herself! She thought she could not, but his curt statement of ‘disobey and I will use a strap instead of my hand’ encouraged her. She rested her forehead on the desk and reaching behind her with both hands she lifted the hem of her skirt until it lay over her back. He then described the view he had of her bottom in very basic language. His description of the way her swollen sex lips bulged into her panties was particularly crude and said with distinctive pleasure.  A short while later he moved to her left side. He reached over her back and pulled her right hip towards him, holding her still by trapping her against his thigh.

I've recently had the chance to think about TPE more, and I decided that there are ultimately four types, three of which I consider acceptable. In order of intensity, there is first the type, which is simply pushing past where a sub/slave would normall safeword, but not pushing so far that the subconcious is actually forced to acknowledge that they are not in control. This is a stage where a slave is usually begging or angry. The second is the type that I practice currently. Pushing past where people think their limit is, past the second limit where their subconscious gives and realizes that it can only endure, but not going past the last one. The one that makes the mind retreat and can cause trauma. I just brush up against it. The third is when someone deliberately breaks through that last barrier, repeatedly doing so in order to shape the slave into what they desire, using that shaping to subsume other desires and wants, to change who they are at the core level. This is acceptable when a Master has the time, will, and facilities to manage fully breaking a slave, and a slave has agreed beforehand. The last is just the territory of psychopaths, just breaking for the sake of breaking, to do as much damage as possible, and only for their own amusement.

Maintenance Beating There has been an on going discussion about maintenance beating.  Generally, I adhere to the idea of that in order to keep the slave's mind right. Of course, regular maintenance beatings are seperate and apart from punishements that may have been earned by the slave. Certainly, when intially entering My service daily maintenance beatings are necessary to promote acculturation.  Service to Me requires a greatly reduced ego in the slave.  That energy that was once selfe centered in the slave must be redirected to My benefit. Thing is, the slave that I desire wants exactly the same thing.  However, not infrequently its social adjustments have included messages about itself that contradict its inborn nature and it lives in conflict.  To the degree that conflict is resolved to that degree it finds peace and fullfilment. There is the issue of pain sluts.  These masochists crave punishment.  With this type I do have alternate means of ego right sizing. On an ongoing basis maintenance beatings will most likely be the rule in My house.  The frequency and intensity of the beating will be tailored to My desires, not the slaves.

I’ve been sitting on an idea… and I think it’s time to bring it to life. I’m putting together a show called Hierarchy Protocol. A real space. A real house. Real people. For one week, a select group of submissives, slaves, and Dommes will live under structure. Roles will be assigned. Tasks will be given. Behavior will be observed. No fantasy. No hiding behind a screen. Just how you actually function. I’m not looking for everyone. I’m looking for people who are serious, who understand discipline, and who are willing to step into something real and be seen. This is still in the early stages, so I’m also looking for people who are willing to help build it—production, ideas, structure, whatever you bring that’s actually useful. So I’ll ask you directly— Would you be willing to step into something like this? Or help me bring it to life? If so… come talk to me. — Goddess Nikki

  Whispers in the Dark In shadows deep, where silence reigns,We found each other, bound by chains.A stranger’s touch, no names to speak,A pull so dark, it left me weak. Your eyes, they burned—a hidden flame,I felt the heat before you came.A silent promise in the air,No need for words, just raw despair. Fingers traced forbidden lines,In the dark, our bodies twined.A gasp, a moan, the night stood still,Desire bent to reckless will. No questions asked, no futures planned,Just my body under your command.We danced between what’s wrong and right,Consumed by fire, lost to the night. In the blackest void, we came undone,Two strangers, joined until the sun.And when you left, the shadows stayed—A ghost of pleasure, a price we paid.

Journal Update - November 2024 I'm Tara and I'm coming back to this site afgter having nearly given up on everything and being lost for a while. I am pre-op trans. I was on hormones, but the health scare I have took me off them for a while. I won't be able to recommence them until January 2025. If that's a problem for you I entirely understand.I've got a lot of kinky hobbies, one that some people know about me is that I have worn chastity since March 2020. I unlock once a week for shaving and cleaning. I switch between two very small devices which can go largely unnoticed under most of my wardrobe.I live 24/7 as a woman. I do have some real struggles with dysphoria, the person I see when I see myself in the mirror often doesn't match how I feel. I wish the NHS moved faster. I want to do this all right so am not taking shortcuts.I love, and I mean really LOVE bondage. Put me in cuffs and a collar and I will melt into submission. Over the next few weeks I think i am going to use the journal to share some of my past expereinces.Tara xox  

I was playing around and took the BDSM test.  Here are the results, even though I don't agree with some of them. == Results from bdsmtest.org ==  100% Rigger  100% Master/Mistress  99% Sadist  98% Voyeur  95% Dominant  90% Non-monogamist  89% Owner  75% Brat tamer  72% Degrader  68% Experimentalist  41% Exhibitionist  40% Primal (Hunter)  40% Masochist  38% Switch  29% Submissive  23% Rope bunny  20% Brat  19% Vanilla  15% Primal (Prey)  13% Daddy/Mommy  10% Pet  5% Slave  0% Boy/Girl  0% Degradee    0% Ageplayer   

In Januaury of last year I started a path I never saw myself doing... I hired a trainer and started working out 4 days a week... I feel like there should have been a betting pool, or something, because I NEVER expected to be on that same path a year and four months later...but here I am, healthier, at least 40 pounds lighter, and feeling so much better, physically, mentally, emotionally and about myself. I constatnly amaze myself with things, like how four years ago my doctors said I'd never lift more than 10 pounds... last Wednesday, I did dead lifts at 205 pounds for 5 reps... or how they said I would never be able to handle running again, I started jogging on the treadmill (supervised of course) and have a total of 5 minuets over 2 days, not bad for something I haven't done in over 20 years, and for someone with "heart failure"... In the last 20 years of my life, I've gone from an active live to inactive, a 30 waist to a 46, now back down to a 38, inching (get it?) closer to 36 actually... and all I can thinks is "Wow! I really like doing this!" You see, when I was a kid, it was the "jocks" the weightlifters, the football ogres, I mean players, that bullied harrased and made me feel insecure about being gay, if only they tried that today... anyhow, I never figured that this training I do now would be enjoyable because of that. Actually it's more than enjoyable. I get out of bed in the mornings with energy, ready to conqure my day and all that it throws at me! All because one day, I decided I wasn't gonna let heart failure win. Because I decided to be a healtheir, better me. And because I literally dared myself to do it! Who knows, maybe in a few weeks I'll give a progress update...

I find it tether offensive that too few people have actually read my profile. I mean I put forth the effort to not only share a bit of myself and what I am looking for but wrote it out rather clearly.  i mean if you can not respect me or at least pretend to give a fuck long enough to read it, why the hellshould I believe you would respect me. If I can’t trust you with the smallest of things like reading my profile, then what the hell makes you think I would trust you to care in a session, date, whatever? i put things in my profile to help YOU understand me and what I am looking for, as well as what I can offer. Furthermore I am not going to tell you read it. I shouldn’t need to. BUT, I do know if you have read it or not. How do I know? Maybe you should have read the thing in the first place. As I am on my soapbox at the moment, to all the people who send a one line, or worse one word greeting message, listen up. That may work at a bar or speed dating, button here a lot more is needed. I know you want to do the least amount of actual effort you can but you get out what you put in. If you can’t even try to make a nice and prober introduction, I can only assume you equally lazy with everything else and not worth my time.   just something to think about

Be who you are—fully, unapologetically, without hesitation. Not the version shaped by expectation. Not the version softened to be accepted. But the one that exists underneath all of that—clear, aligned, and undeniable. Let what no longer fits you… fall away. All the expectations that were never yours.All the identities you outgrew.All the roles you kept playing out of habit, not truth. Release them. Allow everything that isn’t aligned with you to dissipate naturally—without force, without resistance. What’s meant for you doesn’t need to be held together artificially. Free yourself from what no longer exists. And then… build again. With intention. With clarity. With honesty about who you are and what you need. If matriarchy is your path—walk it with confidence.If servitude is your language—speak it without shame.If structure, devotion, power, or surrender call to you—answer fully. There is nothing wrong with becoming who you were meant to be. The only mistake is refusing to. — Mistress Nikki Vixen

Devotional sense of service. The devotional service of a submissive or slave is a sublime act that a submissive/slave person provides to a dominant Master/Mistress person and this act placed on the right person must culminate in pure love.  "Master/Mistress: Someone to whom a sub surrenders totally and lovingly. Someone, a submissive trusts to love and honor her. Someone that cares for submissive mental and physical health as well as their emotional needs."  (Perry). The devotional service of a submissive/slave is directly linked to the love and respect that all the submissives and slaves of our wonderful lifestyle deserve;  even more, the benefit of honoring that spiritual devotion to service should further deepen the love for the person who provides it to us since he/she puts his/her trust in our hands. Devotional service must obey standards that largely depend on the style of the relationship in which it is applied. Each Master/Misstress has his/her style, rules, and code of conduct that he wants his submissive or slave to manifest depending on the circumstances and the moment.  "There's a whole etiquette to this, and what almost seems to be a quite rigid code of behavior to go along with it." (Kelly, 2003). It is amazing how much a Master/Mistress can learn from his/her beloved submissive or slave, which constitutes another insane doctrine about his devotion to us that takes us beyond the love we may have for him/her. The attention dedicated to the good training of the sub-slave helps us to generate confidence in the devotion provided with the certainty that there will be more rewards than punishments. The subs-slaves often display behaviors that reflect devotion, cooperation, and solidarity, and are guarded by their Master/Mistress that makes us feel proud to be part of this fabulous lifestyle. Sources Perry, V., Lifestyle Protocol As Used Kelly, S., (2003). A Kink In Her Tails. The USA, Ellora’s Cave publication.

Its been a loing time, but the writing bug bit again since Christmas. I have a novella pretty close to completetion. Looking for volenteers to help edit it. Here is the synopsis an AI created for it: In a shattered world ruled by ruthless megacorporations, eighteen-year-old Sophia clings to the last independent farm outside the megacity. Each night she dreams of the same man — tall, blue-eyed, commanding — who pins her against walls and claims her body with effortless authority.  When the farm faces ruin, her desperate parents send her to the black skyscraper that purchases beautiful, impoverished girls. Few ever return.  Under a merciless spotlight, Sophia meets the man from her dreams. He sees in her a rare, natural submissive ready to be broken and remade.  Stripped, examined, collared, and renamed Initiate 37XY8C, Sophia begins her transformation from frightened farm girl to obedient pleasure slave in a hidden world of absolute power and perfect surrender. A dark, intensely erotic dystopian tale of total submission.    

It's the down days, with the beating sun and the drawn shades, keeping the outside out and the inside in...the days where the tears finally grab hold and the tissues are everywhere. It's the days where one pm could be 10 am or 730pm and none would know, for i remain alone, always alone. My friends are few and far between. My heart landed on the curb and i keep waiting for someone to pick it up and hand it back, though i know better. It was stolen and now it doesn't fit in my chest anymore. So whenever i breathe the sound is like an empty drum for the beat does not even echo. The hurt is like a neon glow in the dark super ball that just bounces from surface to surface, so i can't quite steady it, or myself. It's still light outside. My watch never made it to my wrist. And luck flew like a hummingbird, out of sight. And the man i love...cannot love me. So i sit and pretend that once upon time i was happy and once upon a time i will be, again.   zamarra/aka eslavegirl 7/14/24

My story......Back in 2007 I filed for divorce divorce after 20 years of marriage. I got very tired of his narcissistic behaviors. There was one time that I should have called the police on him and I didn't and that's when my ex attempted to choke my oldest child, because she said something under her breath and he heard it. It was Israel also in 2007 that I was introduced to this lifestyle, by a doctor friend of mine. He was the one to train me so to speak and introduce me to it. I am very thankful for him.  in 2009, my divorce was finalized, the day before my 52nd birthday.  I have had many subs and slaves over the years. Mostly part time.  People have asked me why don't I have one now and that is because when I moved to Florida from Connecticut I released my sub/slave.  It's very difficult to find one that is not a "do me" type. I am looking for a very specific type. I am looking for one that will be able to mix vanilla and Ds. I'm also looking for a long term relationship. I'm not looking for a live in, at this time. Please be sure to read the rest of my journal entrie. 

No, I am not looking for a sugar baby and I will not entertain those intent on wasting time. If your profile is blank, it’s highly unlikely you’ll get a reply.   What I am looking for:   A genuine connectionThose who can communicate and contribute to a conversation (yes, I will take the time to get to know you and expect the same in return)Honesty and transparencySomeone who has a solid sense of herselfEagernessVulnerabilityIntelligence   What I am NOT looking for:   Those with fake profiles (they’re easy to spot)Time wastersThose who misrepresent themselves in their profileThose who lack the ability to communicate (having to ask 20 questions to start or maintain a conversation is painful)Those who think they know everythingJudgmental people (if you don’t like my profile, move along)

To be a Domme   This ideology (that you have to peg someone to dominate them) is everything that is wrong with femdom porn.   I don’t need to penetrate anything other than your mind to dominate you.   Dominance is not about penetration.   Exchanging power is not about penetration.   I assert my dominance by being dominant.   I can lay back, have you penetrate me, and I am still in control simply because I am dominant.   I can suck your cock, have your cock penetrate my mouth, and I am still in control simply because I am dominant.   I can go on all fours, have your cock penetrate my ass, and I am still in control simply because I am dominant.   No act is inherently dominant or submissive.  Most especially penetration.   BDSM and D/s is not about the things that you can do - it is how you love.

Does anyone else crave a connection that is so deep and powerful that it feels like a life line that can't exist without it that connection?  It is something that i crave in the very cell of my being. I am looking to feel it is as though it makes my heart beat or helps air fill my lungs. Online that can be very hard to do as we are not phyisically around each other to get that feeling. Online it is though connection in words or hearing each other voices. I need to find my future Partners that need connections as much as I do. That want and need to be together as much as possible.  I know that  we all have lives and that the world around us can keep us busy. When I am getting to know someone and willing to see where it goes, maybe i am unrealistic but i try to be on this site or other places where we have made a connection to communicate and wait around and respond as quickly as i recieve it or can respond because it is like a lifeline to me to help my heart beat or my lungs take breaths to stay alive. I get frustrated and i have lashed out in my frustration when other's don't do the same things i guess because i feel actions are stronger than words. In me responding quickly is showing that i am taking it seriously and wishing to put in the work to see if this will work out. If not i try to at least wish them the best of luck in finding the one that will make them feel the way i need and crave the connection as well.  

Well life is different. After 12 years of being owned almost 1 year being Free and looking to step foot back into things again. I am looking to start with a play partner or so and work my way up. Vetting will be a must. I am not going to just drop to my knees at first meeting we need to get to know boundaries limits likes dislikes each other etc. Play parties with local hosts and munches can and will be enjoyed. why things failed from my perspective. Rose colored glasses came off when I was the one putting 99% of the effort into the relationship. I stayed faithful throughout but he cheated. He stopped putting effort in first as a dom then as a partner yet still married him. I was trying to hold onto the spark we had in the begining and the man I saw so full of potential. I cooked I cleaned I provided I got forgotten. No birthday christmas mothers day nothing. I had to on many occasions buy my own presents. Even when he picked them I then had to pay for them (we were both working) I made his dreams come true he wanted to own this kind of vehicle sure thing. a motorcycle here got ya set up for one. Hey you need a motorcycle club to join I networked and found one that I thought he would mesh with. I got the day after christmas chocolate covered cherries on clearance and the only kind i didnt like (theres 2 major kinds i didnt want the creme ones) I wanted to be touched loved fucked beaten and i got ehh nothing. I made him a little jealous by going to a kink party without and he came the next one but the flogging just didnt have his heart in it and i could tell. My platonic play partner did a better job than my spouse. He had Poly Pride tattoeed on his person so I asked to find a girlfriend and he blew his stack at me screaming calling me all sorts of names and even by his ex wifes name. Gaslight me about his sexuality that he had told me years ago he was ace (nope never said that) Tried to gaslight me on that argument and broke some of my boundaries that night. I asked him to go to therapy and find couples therapy. He went a couple times then quit. I tried to hold on hope until my kid said mom your not happy dont wait for me to graduate go be happy. So Now thats what I am.  

In answer to an email of a Sir - perhaps others may find more of me too? Sir, I cannot limit myself to a list of check-off boxes, but I detest age play, cnc is something to be careful with and my nipples are simply pain 98%of the time. Water works in themselves aren't appealing to me, but being a slave, I've had bathroom privileges controlled, well, anything in life controlled, to varying levels. I'll obey, but telling me if I can piss or not will not arose me in the least. I'm pretty sure I outgrew roleplay at least a decade ago, but perhaps that wasn't just from a heavy kink community, but young kids.    I think I would be a real pressure on you, kink wise, as honestly, your list is very soft for me. I'm into REAL. I don't do structured scenes unless we're required to, I live my life with a kinky sstreak in all I do. I want a non-stop connection not just to love and laughter, friendship, lust, sex, and more - but to what we are D/s wise. Whether it be subtle like collar or chain, or overt like a controlled regimen or ritualized, it has to flow like the rest does. Not saying it won't ebb and flow, but like the ocean, it doesn't stop.    I need a man who's in the more aggressive and assertive edge. Controlling for his pleasure, but only to the limit of mine. there IS a line between use and abuse; I learned that the hard way. I am a heavy player, as my pictures on fet show. I provide that link very seriously because this website is far too "woke" for who I am. I'm very based, very raw, very tactile and serious. I walk my funny side hand in hand with my serious side and I'm careful of when to laugh or when to stop.    I am very cerebral, very into topics that interest me and I love a rousing argument just as much as I do a relaxed interaction. I get excited over things that others may not connect to other things I like and I slide between topics in a weave of conscious flow that can confuse many people. If you can't juggle 3 or more topics all at once, I'll wear you out intellectually.    Conversely, I'm an extroverted introvert and prefer my days at home, with a watch list of data, news, current events, 2a, political, historical, real crime, true events, etc - or with a book or three at a time.    Right now, medically, I'm pretty fragile, which I detest, but have to admit to. I am kajira, a slave, property such as a dog. I believe chauvinism is how 99% of the world should be and women in power its destroying things faster than men alone ever have. I cannot undo my slavery, no more than excise my brand. I will always see life through the rules of such. That means absolute honesty. I can be careful of how I come across, I can be selective of who and what I answer - unless it's my owner - but to lie by omission is still a lie. I will need help, literally, to get back to the ability to be physically active, in all ways. I don't know if my lungs, or my heart, will ever recover to the point where I will be free of the need for oxygen assistance and cardiac awareness. Right now, living alone (minus teenagers) I have to be careful not to overdo or I end up either collapsed or in the ER... or both. It's scary and mentally... devastating.    I hope this... helps you see deeper into who I am, all around.    Kimberly 

  Joining a M/s (Master/slave) poly house in modern times requires a deep understanding of the dynamics and expectations involved in such a relationship. If you are interested in joining a M/s poly house, the first step is to educate yourself about the lifestyle. This can be done through reading books, articles, and attending workshops or events related to the topic and talking to the house members. Do not  hesitate to ask questions, it shows interest and it will help educate you about the house you are talking to.  It is also important to consider your personal boundaries and what you are comfortable with in a relationship. It is essential to communicate these boundaries clearly with any potential partners. Joining a M/s poly house requires a significant amount of trust and communication, so it is important to establish these qualities with your partners and the Master of the house.  Once you have a clear understanding of what you want from a M/s relationship, it is time to start looking for potential partners. Online communities, such as BDSM or fetish dating sites, are a great place to start. You can also attend local events or workshops to meet like-minded individuals.  When you find a potential partner, it is important to take your time getting to know them and establishing a strong connection. Communication is key in any relationship, especially in a M/s poly house, so it is important to make sure that you are both on the same page.  It is also important to consider the legal and social implications of joining a M/s poly house. Some communities may not be accepting of this lifestyle, so it is important to be prepared for any potential social or legal consequences.  In conclusion, joining a M/s poly house requires education, self-awareness, communication, trust, and a willingness to be open to new experiences. It is important to take your time and make sure that you are comfortable with your partners and the dynamics of the relationship before committing to it. Additionally, it is important to consider the dynamics of the existing M/s poly house that you are considering joining. Each household is unique and has its own set of rules, expectations, and dynamics. Make sure to ask questions and have open and honest conversations with the members of the household before making a commitment.  It is also important to establish clear communication with all partners involved in the relationship. This includes discussing expectations, rules, and boundaries with all partners. This helps to avoid misunderstandings and conflicts within the relationship.  Furthermore, consent is a key ect of any M/s relationship. It is important to establish clear and explicit consent with all partners involved. This includes discussions about what activities and behaviors are acceptable and what are not.  It is also important to have an open and supportive network of friends and family, as well as access to resources such as counseling or therapy. These resources can help you navigate the challenges and difficulties that can arise in any relationship, especially a M/s poly house.  In conclusion, joining a M/s poly house requires a lot of thought and preparation. It is important to educate yourself about the lifestyle, communicate openly with potential partners, and establish clear expectations and boundaries. Above all, it is important to prioritize your own comfort, well-being, and happiness in any relationship.      

Seduced by the similarities, but buggered by the differences   This was a phrase I coined while leading a business initiative for an Australian company trying to bring their product into the UK. It ended up being one of the most stressful chapters of my career. At first glance, everything looked aligned: The same (or at least similar) language A shared business need Comparable economic environments And so on But as we got deeper into the work, the differences began to surface: Cultural and attitudinal mismatches between the people involved Regulatory goals that didn’t quite line up Different interpretations of seemingly simple terms like “independent” Very different ways of handling conflict And more little surprises The stress built, and eventually the whole thing collapsed—not with a dramatic bang, but with the slow, weary “death by a thousand cuts” that happens when one key player refuses to acknowledge problems that have become impossible to ignore. Why bring this up here? Because there’s a striking parallel in the world of trying to find a compatible partner in BDSM. It’s incredibly easy to see a profile—someone calling themselves a submissive or a slave, someone listing their likes and dislikes—and think, “Ah, promising match!” We assume we know what they mean. We assume they know what they mean. But that’s not always the case. Something that feels wonderful at the start can hit speed bumps quickly as tiny cracks appear and widen. Tension rises, misunderstandings multiply, and… well, you can guess the rest. Finding a truly compatible, sustainable partner can feel a bit like throwing a dart blindfolded from 100 yards away and hoping to hit the bullseye. And yet, we’re all still here trying. So on some level, we must believe the effort is worth it.

You felt something real when you found me. That pull you’re describing… you don’t need to question it. Come here. Be still for a moment and let everything else fall away. In my presence, you don’t have to chase, you don’t have to prove, you don’t have to search anymore. You’re safe here. Not because you’ve lost yourself… but because you’ve found where you belong. If you’re going to be devoted to me, then let it come from clarity, from trust, from the quiet certainty that you’re exactly where you’re meant to be. I don’t need you overwhelmed. I need you steady… focused… and aligned with me. So come closer. Stay here. I chose you — Mistress Nikki Vixen

About to lose control, he sighed in the affirmative when she asked if he needed to use the toilet.   His ankles were unclipped. One wrist was detached from his belt. Sheepishly he allowed himself to be guided to a powder room through the next door.   Completing his business, much relived, he emerged from the room.  He noticed a walk in closet transformed into a cell with a bed and chair. There, hung over the back of the chair were his clothes. It was late, she was no longer amused. Keys were thrust into his free hand. “get dressed Mr. Gimp!”   It was then he realized they had never exchanged names. He wasn’t even sure of the address. Sitting on the bed fully dressed with the keys and restraints on the chair, she took off the hood. A taxi was waiting outside to return him to the Hotel bar.   Her voluptuousness pressed against his face, she pulled him to his feet and kissed him passionately full on his trembling lips. “ Be gone Mr. Gimp!” She patted his butt and pushed him out the door to the waiting taxi. The driver was well paid for his discretion.

  My story  Where to start ? I like many Tgs, I started at a very young age , i was treated different , family members dressed me in effeminate clothes,  and taught me domestic skills , sewing cooking,  cleaning , serving food and beverage to others. Already trained as a feminine physical submisive by the time I was 6 . I had my first encounter with 2 sisters that lived across the street.  We were playing in their back yard , and they had me get  in a big cardboard box.. Where I grew up backyards were very large and acre or 2 so a backyard seemed immense, and you could be isolated yet still be in the yard . Amy way  they started telling me a story about giant would challange their pray , before they devoured it. As they told the story , they had me strip , to show the spiders I would follow the orders , soon I was in a box naked with the girls holding my clothes . My last test to prove to the spider I should not be devoured would be to stay in the box until they returned . I stayed in the box the rest of the day until it got dark . Then the oldest sister came out and dropped my clothes in the box and told me I could go and one day would make someone very happy. I got dressed and hurried home as fast as I could , but i had missed dinner and it was dark , two rules icouldn't break.  I walked into the house to the waiting belt of my father and the screams and swats of my mother for being late . Though the pain was intense I was used to it , to me this is how parents showed theoir love.  And unknown to me at the time  was about to come next in the new house . Sometimes  I still wonder what happened to the sisters  they moved a few weeks later , and my family  moved a  months later.  

PROFILE UPDATE: So to avoid being locked out of my account, I will make my updates here. Something to note, the age range here superceeds all other age requirements listed in any of my writings and profile.  Who and what I'm looking for: Service submissives and/slaves Ages 21 - 48 Anticipatory Service Service Submission Real time service  What I'm not looking for: Online Service Those who only want to talkThose who are over 50 years old Those who are sissies are looking for feminization. Not my kink! To be your kink dispensary.    MY KINKS IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER: Domestic servitude(s/s/b doing handy work, mechanical work, chores, personal care - whether you do it yourself or pay for it to be done) Impact Play: I love taking My bare hands to someone's ass cheeks, but I also love using floggers, riding crops, whips and paddles. I am happy at varying levels of impact play. Tease and Denial/Anticipation Co-topping with a fellow Domme/Dom Hair pulling Collars and leashes Face slapping Some small forms of humiliation Manners Kissing THINGS I AM OPEN TO WITH THE RIGHT PERSON/IN THE RIGHT CIRCUMSTANCES SUCH AS THOSE IN SEVITUDE TO ME AND THOSE WHO SHOW THEY ARE CONSISTENT IN THEIR SUBMISSION TO ME: Foot worship: If I form a relationship with a sub who has a foot fetish, I will indulge. CBT: If this is something that a cock having sub would like done. Pussy Torture - I am very fond of whipping Sensual Domination: I love making someone's skin tingle, whether it be from scratching, caressing, biting, or sucking on their inner thighs. I also live for making My subs melt into Me from hot, drawn out make-out sessions and sensation play.. Strap-ons Anal play/Pegging Face sitting and smothering  LondonTriangle 

Message to women of all natures on here. Not to sound paranoid but I am noticing a flux of messages from European men trying to invite themselves into my company. Can you all be vigilant if a man uses the words relocation and marriage in the same sentence. I have been bitten once by a German man who in my opinion clearly invites himself across Europe into people's homes for free food and stay.  I am assuming there may be a European influencer advising men this is ok. There also seems to be a bit of a scam where a man claims they travel all over the world and then says they won't be back till X date.  I think this is another scam where they claim to be successful and the travelling lifestyle appeals to most but I think it is just another scam.   Luckily, I have not been bitten by that nonsense but ladies be vigilante, give the normal men a chance and the ones acting strange and pretending to be high flyers, don't give them any of your time.   If you want a rich old man go to SugarDaddy.com, if you want a normal kinky man just be patient and kind to others.