As a More Typically Dominant CD Gurl it is easy to become frustrated and disalusioned with being Dominant when you do not have anyone reliable to Dominate. Too many panty wearers who think that is Crossdressing and never want to go beyond that. As stated previously, most CD Gurls also have a Submissive nature, but does not appear until she meets a more aggressive and Dominant CD Gurl or a Dominant Male who knows how to entice a CD Gurl to go under His spell. Since a CD knows the fun of being chased, a more Dominant CD gurl is usually the chaser, it is easier than imagined to switch and become the submissive once a more powerful force cums and takes you. All your other ideas become more of a fantasy and the overpowering reality of being taken and controlled seems so easy to succumb to. Sort of like a Moth being drawn into the fire, but knowing you will not return to the way you were is the daunting temptation of being seduced. In messaging with some ex-slaves they said the hardest thing to deal with was boredom when not used often enough for domestic and sexual servitude. All the changes and different usage was something all slaves learn to comply with and a Master's Protocol was Law. So an idle CD Gurl can easily be drawn into a Life of Servitude as a Submissive Slave, and knowing this can cause this to be an uncontollable yearning that can not be denied? So........??? Once the door closes behind you, you will be a slave to a MASTER. From messaging with several Masters, the general consensus seems to be if a potential slave is 1st properly broken and deprived of it's dignity it will become completely subjugated and dependant on satisfying it's Master as it's only goal and reward. It will not yearn or miss anything or anyone from it's previous life. Then the slave will be a slave that can be trained to any Master's protocols and it's new slavic life of eternal servitude. Even if the slave is required to wear a cuckold device it no longer thinks about having orgasms or masturbating. A properly trained slave seeks to give it's Master sexual stimulation with orgasms. To simply deny a slave what it once had and craved in it's previous life, it will still think about those things when it is left in isolation and restraints. The slave might even be considering a way to escape? Properly broken a slave never thinks about the past. It's life belongs to it's Master. Master decides everything. You probably will never have a female again. You might never wear clothes again, but if you do, the clothes will be chosen for you. Might be as little as a jock strap? You might never wear girlie girl fem clothes as you once loved to wear. You will no longer be bi-sexual, you will be 100% Gay for your Male Master. You will be Owned Property.

I prefer to take thing, it's easier to ask for forgiveness than permission Plus permission can be hard to come by. Why now just take it and break it into what you want  Just be comfortable with yourself in skin.   Anything can be beautiful with confidence 

Piercings Piercings can be incorporated into BDSM play as a form of body modification and enhancement of sensory experiences. However, it's important to note that piercings are a personal choice, and engaging in any BDSM activities involving piercings should be based on informed consent, safety, and proper aftercare. Here are some points to consider: 1. Informed Consent: Consent is vital in any BDSM activity, including piercing play. All participants should have a clear understanding of the risks, implications, and intentions behind the piercing. Open and honest communication is crucial to ensure that everyone involved is comfortable, informed, and consents willingly to the activity. 2. Safety and Hygiene: If piercings are involved in BDSM play, it is essential to prioritize safety and hygiene. Sterilization of piercing equipment and following proper aftercare protocols are vital to minimize the risk of infection and other complications. It's advisable to consult a professional piercer who adheres to strict hygiene standards and has experience in BDSM-related piercings. 3. Sensation and Aesthetics: Piercings can provide unique sensations and aesthetic enhancements during BDSM play. They can be used as points of attachment for restraints or other bondage accessories, adding an element of control or vulnerability. Sensory play involving piercings, such as gentle tugging or stimulation, can also be explored within negotiated boundaries and consent. 4. Healing and Aftercare: It's important to consider the healing process and aftercare of piercings. Certain BDSM activities may put stress on freshly pierced areas, hindering the healing process. Adequate time should be allowed for healing before engaging in any activities that might disrupt or damage the piercing. Following proper aftercare instructions provided by a professional piercer is essential to minimize complications and promote healing. 5. Emotional and Psychological Impact: It's crucial to recognize that piercings can have emotional and psychological significance for individuals. Engaging in BDSM activities involving piercings requires understanding and respect for each participant's feelings and boundaries. Regular communication, check-ins, and aftercare are essential to ensure the well-being and emotional support of all involved.   As with any BDSM practice, piercings should always be approached with caution, consent, and a focus on safety. Educating oneself, seeking guidance from professionals, and engaging in open communication with all participants are vital to creating a consensual and enjoyable experience.

Em (they/them), a disabled, nonbinary, Dominant human is looking for service creatures who want to be helpful and engage in service with someone who is very appreciative.    Tasks may include but are not limited to:   - Adventures in grocery shopping - Domestic assistance including but not limited to: dishes and kitchen care, laundry help, meal prep, and execution - Secretarial type work including but not limited to: admin type stuff and even just dictation, often regarding the podcast or other form of kink  education) - Grooming and beauty maintenance including but not limited to: bleaching and dying my hair, special occasions might call for doing my hair and makeup or helping me pick out clothes (and get into them if corset or leathers)   Requirements:   - Not bothered by 420 smoke (welcome to partake in the house) - Ok with big dogs (12 year old couch potato pittie) - Not a devotee, chaser, or “BBW lover” - I am more than my body. - I practice ethical nonmonogamy and currently have one partner, my husband. I am open to other relationships starting. Must be ENM or strictly platonic with me. - Open to all genders and orientations (except romance with heterosexual cis people as they wouldn't be interested in me anyway unless they saw me as a woman) - Age: 25-40 - Near Hutchinson, KS and willing to drive to me   Things I can offer in exchange: - a place to provide service that is meaningful and helpful - a space to be yourself in your gender and social expression - companionship - praise and appreciation  - education - training and skill development - advice - emotional support - tasks (toward personal growth) - accountability - sensual interactions (i.e. hugging, cuddling, playing with hair, etc) available if compatibility and connection felt and when negotiated. As a demisexual individual, I prioritize forming a deep emotional connection with someone before engaging in any kind of play or sexual interaction. I am also open to things staying platonic/casual. - kink play available to be negotiated occasionally if we happen to have an overlapping fit of interests.   I am into the idea of multiple people filling these roles as they are able. If you would like to apply, please read my profile (to confirm) and DM me introducing yourself and what you'd like to negotiate.    I look forward to hearing from you and seeing if we are a good match.  

Desire part 3   I slapped his erection and asked, "do you belong to me?"   "Ehn" he nodded, the veins in his arms standing out as he tensed and raised his hips again nodding as best he could.   I squeezed his erection roughly. Scooting my body backward and hovering over it.    "Do you want to be inside of me?"    He made a strangled noise and thrust up in my grasp. I slammed down on him. Filling myself. Fucking myself with him as if he were just a living dildo. He moaned under his hood. A faceless man. An object. A dog.  Not allowed to cum unless I used the command word. The special word. One I won't write here.   I moaned and rode him leaning back and grinding so that his pubic hair tickled my clit, then leaning forward to press the sensitive bud into his pubic bone. I could feel myself clenching around him and dripping, soaking us both as I drew closer to my orgasm.   "Please. your. Empress," I hissed, "hold your breath for me." I pressed my hands over his mouth and nose in his hood and rode him harder, my ass and thighs clapping against his thighs. And for 40 seconds he seemed to be calm but then he began to buck, fighting for air as he neared a minute without, his heart beat furiously in his chest, visibly so, and his bucking slowed, I felt myself there at the edge of my orgasm, I let him have air and released his bound arms. Tired from restriction he reached out slowly and grabbed my thighs and hips and thrust up into me furiously as I cried out in pleasure. Dripping around him as my pussy sucked and twitched and clenched around him.  Obediently he didn't cum.  Once I finished he put his hands back beside his head so that I could bind him again. He lay there still. His dick still deep inside of me. His heart still racing as his chest rose and fell.   I climbed off of him and stumbled towards the door as he lay there on the floor. I gave him one final look and said, "good night, my pet", before I clicked off the light, left the room, and locked the door. Leaving him there on the floor, tied in his hood, bound, naked, alone, erect and frustrated in the dark. While I, well fucked and satisfied, returned to my bed and my book.   

i am pretty sure he's done with me.  No idea how I'm going to get through this feeling of failure.  I don't think I possess the ability to move on.  He owns every part of me. My thoughts are wrapped around him, our interactions, our love.  I don't surrender temporarily. I don't quit just because things get hard. I never have.  But somehow I'm supposed to quit him? Quit us? And just carry on? The very thought is viscerally painful.  I miss him. He still won't talk to me. Not even to tell me one way or the other.  On FetLife he's still listed on my profile. I suggested he remove it if he was done with me, that it would give him a way of telling me without the need for direct contact, if that's what he wanted. He is still listed.  All I know is, it's going to take the death of hope to let him go. 

Presently screening and vetting 43 prospective owners from US, UK, Australia.Two are former military.They are the first two it has gone to voice communication. Most presently.Building up trust is a very important before even a physical meeting to see if they truly know how to have a real slave.Its cautious after being in this Lifestyle for 37 years.And being a former Collarspace mentor and Collarspace admin.Dealt with far too many craziness and right nutters.

It’s no surprise that I have been on this site Collarme now called CollarSpace a long time since Two thousand and eight and I am becoming impatient. I try to be as transparent as possible whenever the time arises. I have been lied to way too much to do anything less than be honest and hopefully get the respect of honestly back. I have been lied to most of my life about big and small things As my birth mom would say I HATE LIES especially volunteer lies I felt that in my soul when she said that. Willingness to communicate clearly is easier said than done I have to say I put my all in everything I do and say and for many of these sites that I am on I feel like guys only see or want what they see or want and dont actually want the real deal just the fantasy of it all. I would love to find a balance between the vanilla and the S/M world. I feel like I am a very direct and transparent person but maybe I am not? I am very tired of expending resources, time, and energy on frivolous endeavors. SIGH!!!

Too many people say they want an FLR when what they really mean is, “I have a fantasy I want you to perform for me.” A Female-Led Relationship is not a shortcut to kink. It is not instant authority, automatic discipline, or a woman becoming your personal manager because the idea excites you. This week’s blog post breaks down the common mistakes people make when asking for an FLR — from leading with fantasy, ignoring her needs, rushing authority, confusing service with performance, and expecting rules without accountability. If you want a woman to lead, begin with respect. Then prove you can listen. Read the full post:  https://www.tlduncan.com/post/common-mistakes-people-make-when-asking-for-an-flr

Sacred Intimacy: The Art of Birthing Orgasm in the Union of Dominance and Submission   i had previous mentioned in another post that i had an upcoming writing about when a dominant man and a submissive woman come together in a sexual nature in a sacred sexuality focus. and specifically when the man uses that dominant qualities in him to lead her into the experience with the goal of birthing her orgasms from start to finish. be it one or multiple. and how this isn't the same popular orgasm control discussions in the non sacred sexuality bdsm community or whatever porn is going on that i don't know about. well this is that post.   i usually add a bunch of visuals to both break up the text, put in an added layer of energy, and to add emphasis to my words..but i'm being called by spirit this moon day of emotions to let the words speak for themselves this time.   i said that this one is a juicy topic both figuratively and literally. except for a lot of people who might think this is something they are interested in, it will probably turn a lot of the men off. and will turn some submissive women away.   there's vanilla sex, kinky sex, bdsm power dynamic sex, creative/artistic sex, and then there's sacred sexuality. and everyone loves the part of sacred sexuality that promises full body head to toe orgasams. everyone loves the promise of multiple orgasms, especially for the fact that for a lot of times it's the first time a man is hearing he too is capable of doing it. a lot are into or can wrap their head around the semen retention for more vitality, and powerful orgasms when he chooses to do so. and everyone loves the idea of having levels of pleasure and egoic ideas of being able to say that they are a tantrika or a tantrini or their ability to confidently tell all the crazy pretzel postures and positions they get into with ease. but this subject of birthing an orgasm both on the individual level and as a couple is something people think they want, but a lot don't truly want. of course there is puja as well and can also happen beyond two people and a group of however big you want to try to do so. usually from what i've experienced and noticed it doesn't really work that well after a certain amount which is why it's sacred sexuality vs. a kinky orgy situation. but my focus has always been the woman alone, or the woman and man in a submissive woman and dominant man perspective. that is my soul lineage/shard/fracture that i'm focusing on.   being a woman and not having a penis, i've never felt called or aligned or challenged to talk about this from the individual man's perspective, or the man's perspective. there are many woman in this field of mine that do. the first 10 years of my writings was focused on the power of sacred sexuality when taken into the woman's own hands. i've recently been focused on my writing specifically in regards to the in tandem dynamic of the synergy and energy going on in relationship.   while any archetype of energy signature/personality/essence/role/identity of men can choose and step up to take on the role of birthing a woman's orgasm consciously my focus is again is for the dominant man who is doing this.   to ease into it, just like you need to ease into the actual act i wanted to clarify on what i meant earlier about how this is seperate from what the lifestyle community and terminology commonly uses as the understanding of the kink or definition of orgasm control..and how this different understanding can open a whole new way of operating using this term.   nowadays when a man says they are into orgasm control and a woman is either literally into it, which is honestly men very very rare in the long term and outside of the idea of it, or willingly goes about it due to her submissive and slave tendences they are meaning the following. the woman gets her sexual energy to rise, and is not able to release to peak orgasm without the approval of the man. usually the man then does nothing to guide, direct, control, hold, use the energetic masculine force of action physically or in other forms, or take charge of how it happens. it usually turns into a game of red light green light. he simply tells her usually no. no no, until yes. some of them will simply want you to ask and then they'll say yes after hearing it. a lot of the men see this as a form of domination and control. they think the power is having a woman at the peak of completion and creation in their hands. and tell her yes or no is the ultimate way of showing her obedience and his mastery. over my adult life as a naturally submissive and slave woman trying to find my owner, an intellectualizing mystic who as in all areas of my life want to fully absorb whatever it is i do learning/hearing/experiencing/discussing with others who are like me be it lifestyle or just the natural born ones who do not engage in the community themselves, and observing the changes over time with the ebb and flow of the community at large i've heard and seen many men explain how and why this concept of orgasm control works for them and what it does for them.   i see this understanding as a misnomer. it feels like a very passive act. a way for the man to step outside of the emotions, feelings, and inner world of what he is truly awakening in the woman. he excites something deep inside of her, and especially for women like me of the same soul shard/lineage/fracture that are submissive sexual little girls....the depths of what they unlock in this sexual dance is something magnificent. and then to step out and simply tell her yes, no, wait, teetering into orgasm denial as well which debatable if they are the same thing nowadays in the community of like minded/energetic people moves him from something active to something passive. he's no longer in the sauce with her and it becomes a seperate, disassociated, and blocked version of intimacy. with him more of a director in a chamber or behind a launch room...and her on display.   it goes back to the understanding that in life there is always levels. and this seems to be a very beginner level of domination and unfortunately where most tend to get off. even those who claim and can back up some type of experience of doing this for decades. hence the difference between non vanilla sex and sacred sexuality. and even then, there are plenty of men who step off before getting here.   let's look into some definitions of the word dominant:   a: commanding, controlling, or prevailing over all others   b: very important, powerful, or successful   2**:** overlooking and commanding from a superior position   this can harken back to leadership styles because as with everything, when we go deeper into sexuality we see if we go beyond the surface of touch, energy rise, frustration non orgasm end or poof some type of orgasm satisfaction to be determined and retraction the landscape of sex both individually or with another person operates similar to the nonsexual discussion of engaging with life as well.   there are leaders that simply bark out orders, and there are leaders that lead by action by doing and are in the thick of whatever the project is. and often the most successful leaders with the most engaged team and 'minions' are the ones that experience directly the superiority through doing and excelling and the willingness to try that the leader shows by doing next to them.   if i was to reoriente that term of orgasm control, it would be the man who is actually engaging with her body, mind, soul, and energy from start TO finish. not necessarily telling her simply yes or no, but similar to a conductor using his bod

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  Could you go back to vanilla dating?'Ive decided that I cannot willingly be in a vanilla relationship ever again. There is gonna be some kink, poly, and/or freakiness in My life from now on. I cannot tell you HOW MANY people that I have met that are miserable in their vanilla relationships and sneak out for kink. I have played the kinky therapist for those that are devastated with the thought that they have kinky desires and its "just WRONG." I end up patting them on the shoulders and then paddling their asses every time. Ive seen someone monthly for 5 years that is just now coming to grips with the fact that he likes to be spanked. Wouldnt DARE bring it up at home, but he has to have an outlet somehow.I get it that some people discover their kink AFTER already being in a vanilla relationship, but WHY would someone enter back into a vanilla relationship after knowing what their desires are and try to suppress them? A dear friend mentioned how his inner "naughty girl" sat dormant while life passed him by until he decided to be true to himself. And true he is! yes, it was a gamble getting up the nerve to tell his wife of many years, but in the end... she stayed and they live happily ever after. Im quite certain that 75% of the time it doesnt end that way.Now that I have grown in My kinklife and reaffirmed My dominance, I know a bit more about what I want and expect in a partner, kinklife, and SEXlife and I am not afraid to stand up for what I want and need. Now I have met a decent vanilla guy or three that has captured My interest- or that falls head over heels in love with Me- (yes, that happens to me!) and I am always upfront about My lifestyle and desires and the deal breakers. Some of My 'nilla friends say that I tell them to run them off, but realistically, I am just being honest with Myself and saving them from trying to tell Me that 'its just a phase' and making attempts at changing Me.I've been on a dating site or two and found myself on dates asking "what am i doing having dinner with this biblethumpin' overly righteous, straightlaced man?" and quickly following that thought up with asking him how he feels about doing house work naked and being hogtied and gagged on occasion. (hmm..

+MULTIMEDIA What did you think was the worst movie of all time? - OH, I DON'T KNOW...THOSE GODDAMNED BLINDLY-PATRIOTIC/PATHETICALLY-THEOCRATIC MOVIES ARE NAUSEATINGLY-HORRENDOUS. 😑😑😑😑😑 If you could be any celebrity, who would you be and why?  - DUNNO...WINONA RYDER? 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤 JULIETTE LEWIS? 🖤 DEPECHE MODE? 🖤💜🖤💜 Ever buy a bootlegged VHS or DVD? If so, of what? - NOT THAT I KNOW OF. Would you rather watch movies at home or in the theater? - HOME. I DON'T DO NASTYASS, GERMYASS, DISGUSTINGASS, ANNOYINGASS MOVIE THEATRES. 😑😑😑😑😑 What kind of food do you buy at the theater? - N/A. What artist do you love to sing along with? - MARILYN MANSON, TRENT REZNOR, ROB ZOMBIE, PETER STEELE, JAMES HETFIELD, DEPECHE MODE, DURAN DURAN, DOORS, ALICE IN CHAINS... 🤘😎🤘 What artist do you think has no right to be as popular as they are? - THAT OVERRATED BLOVIATING WINDBAG KANYE WEST. 😑😑😑😑😑 What’s a song that makes you cry?  😞😥😢💔 "I Love You Forever And Ever And Ever, Ma....." 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖 - https://youtu.be/45ft7onAhR4 What movie makes you laugh so hard your stomach hurts? - I DON'T KNOW. I ACTUALLY *USED* TO LAUGH. I EVEN USED TO LAUGH *HARD* SOMETIMES, BUT THAT WAS YEARS AGO. I JUST DO NOT LAUGH ANYMORE LIKE I USED TO. I REALLY DON'T. JUST KNOWING THAT I'M CURSED TO BEING ON THE SAME FUCKING PLANET WITH MILLIONS OF UNFORGIVABLY-STUPID TRUMP SUPPORTERS HAS CERTAINLY KILLED MY HAPPYHEARTEDNESS. 😑😑😑😑😑 Are there any dance/action/fighting scenes from a movie you can perform? - HM...NO. Is there any movie you can quote word for word? - HA...I USED TO...MAYBE "BEETLEJUICE"..."STAR WARS"... +LOVE AND DATING. What do you think of kissing on the first date? - IT DEPENDS. MAYBE IF I ALREADY KNEW HER & HAVE ALWAYS LIKED HER THEN IT'D BE OKAY. EVEN HAVING SEX, HEH. Have you ever experienced unrequited love? - YEAH. UNREQUITED LUST TOO. Have you ever dreamt about your crush/significant other? - YUUUUUUUP. Was it a good dream, or a nightmare? - SEXCELLENCE! 🤩😍🥰🤩😍🥰🤩😍🥰 I HAD A *LOT* OF CRAZY SEXUAL DREAMS ABOUT CASSANDRA; A HOT SEXY OLDER BOSS OF MINE. GODDAMMIT, IF I EVER SEE HER AGAIN, I HOPE WE FUUUUUUUCK MAYBE THOUSANDS OF TIMES THIS TIME. GODDAMMIT, I *WILL* FUCK THE UNHOLY HELL OUTTA HER A LOT! 😝🤪😜😛😋🤩😍 Do the words “I Love You” scare you? - No. I DO NOT BLINDLY-LOVE PEOPLE, I DO NOT BLINDLY-BELIEVE IN LOVE EITHER. Have you ever wanted to ask someone out but didn’t? Why? - OH, YEAH...WELL, I'VE ALWAYS BEEN GODDAMNED FUCKING *SHY*. BUT FOR A WHILE I ACTUALLY MADE MYSELF TO START ASKING GIRLS OUT, BUT SOMETHING ABOUT THAT JUST REALLY DOES *NOT* FEEL GENUINE TO ME. SO I JUST REVERTED BACK TO MY OWN NATURE. MY OWN FACTORY DEFAULT PROGRAMMING. HA. Have you ever been on a blind date? - UUUUUGH. 😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖 YES. SHE WAS *INSUFFERABLY-HORRID*. 😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖 I COULD *NOT* WAIT TO DROP HER HORRIBLE LITTLE AYASS BACK OFF TO HER HOME...WHICH I SUMMARILY DID POSTE HASTE AFTER THE CONCERT. UUUUUGH. 😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖😖 "FORGET about Me even taking you out to Dinner, Movie, & Whatever Else Later....." *sigh* 😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑😑 #UGH! (I've actually written in-detail before about that particular Blind Date before. I won't here right now, though. Maybe I'll look for it & CopyPaste it here in my Blog again later) Does Interracial Sex interest you? -Haha...ummmmm...😛😜🤪😝😆 #iWantHotSexyChocolateDammit! 🍫🍫🍫🍫🍫!!!!!!!😍😋 Do you think Freckles are sexy? -Ohhhhh, Damn Sexy. Yeah.🤩😍🥰 I've seen some Superhot Sexy Women before with LLOTS Of Freckles, yup. #BOINNNNNNNGGGGGGG!!!!!!! 🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪 #FRECKLEPALOOZA. #FRECKLELICIOUS. +THE PAST. What was your favorite childhood toy? - KITES! 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤 BABY BAT! 🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇 Did you play with kids in your neighborhood when you were little? - YEAH. I MISS MY CHILDHOOD FRIEND, SALLY. I THINK I'M IN LOVE WITH HER AFTER ALL THESE YEARS, HA...SHE LOOKS GREAT TO THIS DAY. SHE'S ONLY A YEAR OLDER. DAMN SEXY, PASSIONATE, HYPER, & FIT. 🥰 I'VE ACTUALLY FANTASIZED HAVING HOT GORGEOUS SINFUL SEX WITH HER A FEW TIMES, HA...MAYBE ONE DAY...🤩😍🥰 How many times have you moved? - 5. What were your “awkward years”? - 13 ON UP. Did you have a security blanket/stuffed animal you always slept with? - HA. YUP. GAMBI! HE'S A PLUSHIE STUFFED CLOWN SINCE I WAS 1. I THOUGHT HE LOOKED A BIT LIKE GUMBY SO I NAMED HIM GAMBI, HEH...STILL HAVE HIM! ❤💙❤💙❤💙❤ What was your favorite childhood TV show? - STAR TREK. 🖖😎 Movie? - 'CAT PEOPLE'. 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤 'THE HUNGER'. 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤 'THE CROW'. 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤 'BEETLEJUICE'. 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤 'THE MATRIX' MOVIES. 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤 Did you have lots of new toys or hand-me-downs? - HM...HALF & HALF? I DIDN'T MIND USED TOYS. I EVEN PERSONALLY BOUGHT ME LOTS OF THEM TOO, HA. Is there anything you would change about your childhood if you could? - I G

Reason vs Emotion Many answer My profile with uncertainty about what and who they are. A few have even suggested (demanded, can you believe?) I kidnap them, confine them, torture them until (guess what?) they become what they actually need to be: a total slave.  More frequently, the neophyte slave wants Me to convince their reasoning self that they actually need to be what their emotional inborn self wants and needs. Engaging in dialog with this group leads to exhaustion on My part and ultimate discovery by the struggling slave that “we do not fit” or “it can not quite give up its current existence.” They are trapped in their own internal conflict that I would be hard pressed resolve for them.  On the continuum of living the reality and harboring dreams, fantasies and in born desire those described above are in the middle. Probably, as might well be depicted under a bell curve, that would be the 80% occupying the center range. My guess is about 10% of those with inborn need to submit will live their lives, probably with nagging discontent and frustration, without ever confronting that need. It is the last 10% of the population that I want to find. This last little group are slaves that have accepted what they are. Most likely, if they think about why they are what they are, they will consider themselves ‘born slave.’ Probably only 5% of that 10% will successfully arrive for my inspection. So, in terms of what I do here, the slave the responding to My profile should not expect chat or kidnapping. But rather, be prepared to sacrifice enough to travel to Me for the possible start of a lifetime of what they were born to do: service.

I am a heterosexual submissive transwoman named Julie, and one of the several categories for which the modern term is sissy.  That means as a transwoman I am primarily attracted to men and am submissive to them, though I also enjoy other transwomen.  I am however bigender because I do not want to give up the societal advantages of being male to earn a living.  It took me a long time to figure these things out and realize I was not bisexual.  As a transwoman, I am ideally looking for long-term but occasional relationship with a mostly heterosexual man, ideally as his mistress.  I want to make a man really happy because I'll do things for him that most wives will not.  I will appear to him and behave for him as close to his ideal female partner as I can.*************************The one essential book every transwoman should read is Whipping Girl: A Transexual Woman on Sexism and the Scapegoating of Femininity by Julia Serano, now in its third edition (Seal Press, 2024).  This is a detailed analysis of what it means to be a transwoman and the obstacles we face.  It is important to note on this site that the title does not refer to masochism but to the frequent scapegoating of transwomen in the media as a threat to society.  Serano's argument is that transwomen are demonized because of the rampant misogyny of Western society, where any feminine traits are denigrated, and any masculinity, including the toxic masculinity of cultural conservatives, is privileged. Even some feminists are anti-feminine, not realizing that is probably because they have transmen tendencies.  Part of this "transmisogyny" is also the mistaken notion that male and female are opposites ("oppositional sexism") with nothing in between, and part of it is due to the mistaken belief that your birth gender cannot be changed.  But as the book points out, many men have some feminine traits and many women have some masculine traits.  The book also notes that we constantly unconsciously judge people as male or female based on just a few characteristics without every seeing their genitals or their chromosones, so a person's sex in society is not based on their genetics or organs.The third edition has many good rejoinders to current antitrans-hysteria, notably in the new last chapter.  3% of men and 3% of women appear to have some trans tendencies.  Gender-affirming medical care such as hormones and surgeries for trans people has a low rate of regret, around 1%, whereas similar interventions for nontrans people such as breast augmentation and reduction or hormone supplementation have a regret rate of 14%.  Puberty-blocking medications have been used for years for nontrans children with hormone defects, with no ill effects or inabilty to reverse them.  Trans children who have been denied gender-affirming care have a 14 times higher suicide rate than other children.  Trans children appear in families at the same rate independent of the degree of trans support in their families, so there is no "social contagion" with trans tendencies.  There are more self-identified trans people today than in the past, but that is because society has become more welcoming.  Trans people show no evidence of being sexual predators, any more than women who dress well are sexual predators: Marginalized groups (think blacks) are often hyper-sexualized in the media.  As for "bathroom bills", I find it amusing that the current policy for U.S. government buildings which says that people must use the bathroom of their birth sex, in the avowed goal of protecting women from perverts, forces transmen to go to female bathrooms no matter how much facial hair they have -- something that will make women pretty uncomfortable.  But forcing us transwomen to go to male bathrooms in full drag will not be bad -- men are terrifically scared to look at other men in a bathroom, much less men wearing dresses, for the danger of being throught gay. A weakness of Serano's book is that she sticks to her own perspective as a lesbian transwoman, and doesn't have much to say about transmen.  She also doesn't sound sympathetic to us sissies; she says tranwomen are "fierce" and not passive.  But of course being passive is not necessarily feminine, and could be just reflect to the long oppression of women (as with other minorities) by society.  We need more books on other kinds of trans people.  But for now, Serano's book is important reading.

  Do you have an all consuming foot fetish? If so, you could be the foot slave I am looking for. Duties to include full pedicures, moisturising, massaging and stroking etc. you may also be used as a foot stool should I so desire.  you must be be no further than an hour from me ( East Sussex ) as weekly visits will be required if not more. Shortlisted, you will be given my location and required to meet Me over coffee or wine, depending on my mood. Reply with FOOT SLAVE in the title and garnish me with why you should be considered. One line messages will be deleted. Stand out from the crowd.  M M 

The Cuck is a gentle submissive slim built guy. He can be orally bi but is not into anal or any other form of gay sex. He is  happy just to watch his wife used by other men or group of men. He is just as happy to be made to wait outside once any action is due to start. He sometimes likes to strip his wife naked in front of a bull or a group of men. He will then offer her for play. The wife is a true polyamory woman who enjoys the attention of other men but has no desire to leave her loving husband. She is a natural submissive woman who happens to enjoy degradation in many forms. She also enjoys the finer things in life. Taken out for dinner or drinks by the bull with or without the cuck. She can dress for any occasion but likes to show off in sluty clothes. Taken out in see through tops and micro skirts aspect, this also pleases the cuck.

An evening, recalled by the lady, written by me.It was late afternoon and it had been a tough day at the Commission. His kiss when he met me at the station was warm and affectionate; we chatted on the way to the hotel and as we checked in. When we arrived in the room I dumped my stuff on the bed and went out onto the veranda to look out over the lake. A few minutes later I heard him say ‘come here please’. I turned to see him with an impassive look on his face and standing in the middle of the room pointing at the floor just in front of his feet. He took hold of me around my waist and as he kissed me deeply, his hands travelled from my waist down my hips and across my bottom. Then up my back to my neck and then he felt my hair. He murmured ‘give me your tongue’ and I slipped it between his teeth. He nipped it and held it between his upper teeth and tongue. It was uncomfortable but not painful, he had done it often before and I had grown to like it. His hands resumed their journey around my upper body. They were firm, confident and moved without any hesitation. I could not have ed even if I had wanted too and the welcome feeling of melting inside began. He then released my tongue, kissed my lips then he turned me around and bent me over so my elbows were on the bed. He lifted my skirt and folded it over my back. His hands then roved freely over my bottom and between my thighs. He felt my mons, traced the line of my slit and ran his fingertips between down the crease between my buttocks, pausing to press on my anus. He then held me firmly against his thigh and began to spank me- this had recently become a regular beginning to our time together. One spank per cheek, then two, then three, they landed on my upper thighs and the curve of my bottom. He stopped at six and spent a few minutes gently rubbing my bottom, occasionally slipping his hand between my thighs. At ten per cheek it was stinging a lot. By twelve I was having difficulty keeping still. It was the knowledge that if I moved he would start again that kept me in position. The spanking was not unexpected and it had the desired effect. I felt myself starting to melt inside even more as he rubbed my stinging bottom and thighs once again. He stopped and made me stand. Then looked me in the eye, and then said ‘I have a few issues to resolve with you’. My stomach took a lurch, I’d been here before, he had shown no sign of real annoyance with me recently but then he never really did. He took me by the chin, looked into my eyes and said ‘strip and kneel’. He then turned and went to the veranda. It only took a minute to remove all my clothes and jewellery. I knelt, apprehensive about his return, embarrassed it had been a warm day; I had been wearing tights and had not had the time to wash and prepare myself for him. My make up had gone and I knew I did not look my best. He returned and pushed me forward to my knees and elbows. Pulling back my hair he locked my leather collar around my neck. It felt strange after the long break since I last wore it. The wrist cuffs were fitted next before he clipped them behind my back pinioning my wrists. He pulled my collar by its short leash to make me kneel up and then buckled a gag around my neck and pushed the red ball behind my teeth before tightening   it. He turned me so my back was to the mirror and placed a low backed chair in front of me. He could now see both the back and front of me. Sitting on the chair he told me to part my thighs wide and to emphasise the point his foot nudged my knees wide apart. I hoped he wasn’t going to touch me between my thighs as he so loved too, I so regretted not taking a shower immediately we arrived in the room. From his pocket he took some butterfly style nipple clips. I hate them and he knows it, he threaded their chain into the ring at the front of my collar and after pinching my nipples between his thumb and forefinger to make them fully erect he clipped one to each nipple. The discomfort was almost unbearable, I instinctively closed my thighs, and he ed and gently tugged the chain, sending sharp jolts through me. I did as I was told and spread my thighs wide, pushing my mons forward as far as I could. The gag muffling my weak protests. He spoke slowly, jerking the chain on saying each word. ‘Three weeks ago you forgot your make up, two weeks ago your stockings, last week your high shoes. You have arrived in my company wearing tights for the last 4 weeks, hence the immediate spankings. You have not kissed or greeted me properly on meeting for the same length of time. You make up today is poor, your hair isn’t brushed and you have not left your pubic hair as I instructed. In short young lady you are marring your beauty. You are fully aware how beautiful I think you are and you are distracting from it by being sloppy and that disappoints me. I will not accept you detracting from the pleasure I take in having such a desirable woman as my lover. Do you understand?’ I nodded, my eyes starting to water from the discomfort in my nipples and the realisation of how I had disappointed him. There was also the knowledge that I had been here before and if it followed a similar pattern then this was the case against me. By nodding I admitted my guilt. So I was about to punished for being a sloppy and inattentive submissive who had disappointed her Dominant.  He helped me to my feet by lifting me by the collar on my ring; it also had the effect of tugging on my nipples. He reversed his chair and tugged the chain as he removed each nipple clip. It stung as the blood filled each nipple, my knees almost buckled each time, the gag muffling the g. He then connected my wrists cuffs in front of me, and bent me over the back of his chair so my weight rested on my elbows. ‘Part your legs’ he said, I complied and hoped he would decide to have me, not cane me. I was to be disappointed, though recently spanked I accepted I had earned this too. He fetched a cane from his bag as I waited anxiously. Holding the back of my collar he rested the cane against my bottom, drew it back and struck me. ‘One‘ he said. All I did was hear the sound then the harsh sting reached my brain! He was using the flat cane.  A piece of flexible wood two feet long, an inch wide and a quarter of an inch thick. It didn’t leave tram lines or scars; I knew its stinging would last for ages and leave a square red mark on each buttock, but it would not bruise very much. Not that it seemed important at that moment. Though I find the cane painful, the thonged whip he occasionally uses is worse. Its thick strands inflict weal’s and their tips can get into the most intimate parts of my body. I’ve also known him use it on my breasts and belly. Each cane stroke went slightly lower until the last 3 all struck where the tops of my thighs and my bottom met. My legs kicked out from the stinging, by now I had dribbled spittle around the gag, my eyes were streaming and my nose had started to run. He let go the back of my collar and returned the cane to his bag. Returning he pulled me upright by my collar and turned me to face him. I refused to look him in the eye; I must have looked a real mess. He took my chin again forcing me to look into his eyes. I felt so ashamed of my appearance. He had told me I was beautiful so very often and it made me feel so proud when he said it. Now I had let him down by being too complacent. He unclipped the wrist cuffs, reattaching then in front. He said ‘Do you understand what I have told you?’ I nodded. ‘Then get down on your belly on the floor and spread your legs, I haven’t finished with you yet.’ My mind raced, would it be the whip now, on my bottom? I knelt and lay on the floor, my bottom was really stinging and the carpet was rough against my sore nipples, my belly and mons. I spread my thighs wide, dipped my spine and waited. I heard the pop of a tube of lubricant being opened. It wasn’t the whip!! The lube felt cold against my anus as he applied just enough. He undressed, I could feel him looking at my prone body, the line of my sex and the rose of my anus. I was fully exposed because it was how he wanted me to be. He knelt between my thighs and pumped his cock to make the head larger. He spread my bottom cheeks with one hand and pressed his cock against my anus with the other. The tip entered me, it was so uncomfortable. I had forgotten how tight a caning made the cheeks of my bottom clench. He pushed into me, stretching me. I struggled and tried to object; he held me and reminded me of the presence of the whip. Once he was past the muscular ring I relaxed as the discomfort subsided somewhat; I felt the cool of his skin against my hot bottom. He reached and took hold of my hair and collar, pulling them back. At the first slow thrust he said ‘one’. The thrusts were slow and firm, they made my bottom sting though my anus soon adapted to the presence of his cock. He told me to squeeze my buttocks together as he withdrew his cock, and relax as he thrust in. I tried to do so; each time I failed he added two extra thrusts. He was punishing me and reminding me of his dominance by not taking pleasure from the stimulation my anus could give him. It was a reminder that sexual pleasure could not be an excuse for a lack of submission. It was a relief when he reached 100 and stopped counting and thrusting. I was glad he was no longer forcing my nipples against the rough carpet, and his tummy was no longer making my sore bottom sting more. But I immediately missed the closeness and intimacy of the man I so wanted yet had disappointed. He pulled me to my feet by my collar, removed the ball gag and lifted my chin. I must have looked a real mess as I worked my jaw to stop it aching, I certainly felt a mess and I promised him and myself not to let my appearance or behaviour slip again. He kissed me and said he loved me; I’m not sure if it made me feel any better- or if it was supposed to! He led me by the arm into the bathroom and told me to wash his cock and balls. I took a glimpse of myself in the mirror. I looked horrendous! Mascara running, the marks of the gag around my mouth, spittle around my chin and collar and my nose running! I looked away ashamed as he wet a towel to clean the lube from between my buttocks. He turned me around so my back was to the mirror and rubbed the wet towel firmly between my buttocks, it stung where it touched the red marks.  I heard him say, ‘You have 30 minutes until dinner. Be ready on time.’ I knew that I would make him the proudest man alive when he let me take his arm to dinner. 30 minutes wasn’t long. But I so wanted to see that look of desire in his eyes that I would ensure I was just as he wanted me to be. I knew just how good he would make me feel in return. He went to the veranda to watch the sun set. I set to work, though I did sneak a look at the red marks on my bottom. They made me feel strangely proud because they were his marks and I had submitted to him. He had put them there and there was nothing I could have done about it even if I wanted to. Now I didn’t know what he was going to do with me later, but after being disciplined he always had something special planned for me! 

Smh at the multitude of bois within 50 miles that approach, engage,  insist they want to meet .. until we set a date and time, then backpedal and postpone or cancel with every excuse in the book .. Sooooo...I'm pretty much at the pt I don't wont cant believe anything anyone idk irl says cyber.   If you are one of the very rare pearls here that does want real-time Ds interactions come meet Me at the munch on Thursday 9 29 at Spins in Peekskill 6:30ish. It's an arcade with a bar in the back. I'm the One with long multicolored hair. .. restaurant upstairs is Fin and Brew if that's easier to goo gle Que sera .. or as history here proves, most likely not We.Shall.See

Punishment is based on creating a fear response of some kind. Fear erodes trust and connection. Trust and connection are essential for the surrender of a submissive. Therefore, punishment erodes what is essential to a healthy, successful Ds dynamic. This makes punishment of any sort incompatible with my relationships.  I am a leader and a carer in my career and daily life.  I do not punish any of my charges, and it insults the dignity of another creature to punish them. I make mistakes, but never intentionally. I have no motivation to brat or test the boundaries a partner may set for me. I hate failure, and I hate displeasing. My motivation is to make a partner proud. That is incentive enough to avoid mistakes. That is, provided I have a partner capable of feeling and expressing pleasure, and who wants to have pride in who serves him. A constructed, unnecessary punishment added on top of knowing I have failed or displeased just creates more pain for everyone, and even has more subtle, insidious impact, such as contributing to feelings of inadequacy. The best way to avoid making a mistake is communication, flowing clearly and in quantity in both directions. The best response to a mistake or misunderstanding is to try to get clarity, then discuss it, find common ground, and discuss how to avoid what went wrong. I believe in accountability and responsibility, and also in practicality. I acknowledge that my position on punishment is perhaps unusual or unexpected. I consider myself well healed from my traumas, none of which I would consider terribly serious to start with. I know myself, and I know my needs. I have no hope of serving anyone if I cannot serve with an open, vulnerable heart. Some submissives apparently require a punishment mechanism, either to set aside their mistakes with a physical reminder or something else to even the scales, or to have some sort of other constructed reminder of which way the power exchange flows. I am not so unfortunate. I can understand these concepts perfectly well through verbal reassurance.

     

I'm not sure if this tells anyone anything other than that I occastionally take quizes online, but ...  == Results from bdsmtest dot org ==  97% Dominant  95% Degrader  95% Master/Mistress  90% Sadist  82% Owner  80% Daddy/Mommy  79% Non-monogamist  66% Primal (Hunter)  59% Brat tamer  53% Rigger  50% Switch  46% Experimentalist  37% Ageplayer  31% Boy/Girl  30% Pet  28% Vanilla  23% Brat  22% Degradee  21% Primal (Prey)  16% Submissive  15% Voyeur  10% Exhibitionist  9% Rope bunny  7% Masochist  4% Slave 

I’m not interested in disrespectful, fake subs who throw temper tantrums like toddlers denied candy. I’m not here for a drama queen who thinks his pussy is somehow better than mine — sweetie, we’re not comparing fruit here. Life’s too short for attitude, bad manners, and ego contests. If you want my time, bring respect, humor, and a little humility… otherwise, you can keep your crown and your tantrums for someone else’s court

Tree of life and tree of knowledge were not actually trees. The tree of life was God and the tree of knowledge was the devil. The devil was actively talking to Eve in the garden about how he felt towards God. Eve was believing him and started talking to Adam about it who wasn't sure but eventually sided with his wife Eve. They wanted the devil to rule over them instead of God. It was the devil who told them they were naked. It was the devil who said they weren't getting what they truly needed from God. When God came to the garden they hid from him thinking he was the bad guy that the devil made them to believe. They were clothed with leaves. God questioned this and asked who told them they were naked and they told them the devil did. God then asked them what else the devil said. God then gave them a choice to worship him or follow under the devil's care. They chose the devil. God kicked them out of the garden and explained to them they would die one day because they were leaving the tree of life behind and they would no longer have access to it. They would have to learn from their choices. 

I identify as Heteroflexible so I updated my profile to show my interest in submissive men and transexuals. Im really surprised at the amount of emails I have received in response to that update. The most common question I get is "how can I serve you?" so I thought I would add a journal entry to answer that question. First, Im not gay so I am not attracted to men. However, because I have a control fetish I am flexible in my preferences and am willing to play with men or transexuals that are submissive. My definition of submissive is one that is willing to submit even if there is no sex involved. More specifically I am looking for individuals that want to serve long term. I am a big man so I prefer the bois and gurls I play with to be petite and very feminine. I have a strict one cock rule so you must own a chastity device and I will expect you to wear it whenever you are in my presence. I will not allow you to cum before, during, or after we play. The last thing that I look for in a boi or gurl is that your are close enough to me to meet real time. As for those that are not local but still want to serve, perhaps you could offer me something else. . 

7/25/24- Theres a part of our dynamic that doesnt seem to be acknowleged for what it is..  " Our aim is to connect with the right female who resonates with the idea and has the desire of joining a household but specifically our household... My first girl oversees everyone when I am not present, as work takes me for periods of time. Your domestic duties in the home would be light as its shared amongst the three of you. Simple mundane tasks that your basic upkeep any nucular family household would require, with opportunities to take on more responsibilities if desired over time. Your outward role may be that of a “roommate” or a "housekeeper” to those who don’t know the lifestyle," No this doesn't mean were looking for a maid. We're looking for a sub  and were trying to make it clear that we expect other people to not understand the lifestyle choices everyone makes and that if you are living in this house you will have house responsibilities and expected to help keep it clean. This is common sense. Yes there are two other females in this home but that doesn't mean you don't get to do anything but be in a bed 24/7.... I mean we have to let you out to shower at some point right?  All jokes aside- hoping to find a sub that is service orientated, has slave tendency, or wants to be a slave.  

For my birthday trip, I reached out to a few people a week before my flight to the East Coast.  One here, an admirer: I dropped him a line asking if he wanted to meet for coffee. The records show that he read my message, but he never replied.  On another site, I followed up on a post from someone offering massages. There was no way to message the person directly, but the site indicates that there's a response to a post when you log on. He logged on since I posted my comment, and I heard nothing before I boarded my plane.  I actually saw his reply after I got back: he finally reached out when I was away. However, by the tie I landed and got settled, activities started and I didn't bother checking these sites. He requested a raincheck for my return. I told him sure, if I remembered.  "Oh, if only you weren't so far away ..." my aunt fanny.

Looking for permanent companionship.  I am poly and unpartnered currently.  What I am looking for is obedience and full time servitude. I am not a nice person.  If you please me, you will be rewarded.  If you displease me, you will be punished.  None of that bratty punishment.  You will be punished in a way that you genuinely dislike.  If chaining you up and leaving you alone is something that distresses you, that can be your punishment.  If you dislike pain, or public humiliation, or anything really, I will make it happen so you genuinely suffer.  If you want to be playful and want some of these things, just ask at an appropriate time and I will make it happen as long as you have not displeased me. Also looking for genuine hypnosis subjaspects I am not a monster, I am not a nice guy either.

Studies Show...Intelligent girls are more depressedBecause they knowWhat the world is really likeDon't think for a beat it makes it betterWhen you sit her down and tell herEverything's gonna all rightShe knows in society she either isA devil or an angel with no in betweenShe speaks in third personSo she can forget that she's me

I'm bemused by the number of people who ask me what I'm looking for on here, or whether they can locate or contact me elsewhere. The first should be fairly obvious, I'd think, to anyone who's read my profiles here. As for the second part... I'm quite easy to find. *chuckle* I've determined that after 29 years, I'm just not as interested in chatting online as I once was, and I find small getting-to-know-you talk tedious. I love getting to the meaty topics, though, which is why The F0rm exists.  If, after you've thoroughly read my profiles here (BlueFyre and BlueAngelFyre) and on Fet, and you'd still like to be considered for being in my service, peruse my writing on FL of "The F0rm - What TF and Why TF?!" Once you've completed a section or more, reach out to me and send your responses. After that, I'm sure there will be plenty to discuss. ;)   --Blue (=

Phew and thank god!   I nearly forked out just under £500 on the wrong specimen: 1. £295 for harness gear - custom made still lush 2. £50 for the application in 2 sizes 3. £95 rope bondage lesson but getting discount as the teacher is an old friend of mine   Will still spend for myself but if I ask a man questions it means I am investing time to understand how to give you what you want. You can't give me a second, ok, harness yourself.   I am good.   Still investing in the supplies just finding a worthy destination. Some people like to talk forever and not act on their impulse I was thinking lets act on the impulse not just talk about it.

Building a Shared Language Have you ever thought about the inherently flawed nature of language? What is the purpose of language? At the most basic level language is the attempt to take what is in my mind and communicate it to your mind. Much like the phone game this process is always going to be extremely imprecise. Words are concepts. I'm going to take a string of concepts as I understand them add modifiers and conditionals and then you are going to interpret those based upon your understanding of those concepts and modifiers. Take even the simplest of words. If I say a "tree", basically everyone understands essentially what I mean but not exactly. There are many different kinds of trees, they look very different from each other, they have different characteristics and quirks, different kinds grow in different areas of the world. I'm am in a more rural environment than say NYC is. Something tells me my relationship to the word "tree" is going to be much different from someone who grew up in an urban area. My mind makes different connections and ties different emotions, I'll picture something slightly different than every single person who hears me use the word. That's just for a relatively objective word like tree. What happens when we start getting into more esoteric concepts. Submission, wow talk about a word that can have so many meanings, so many different emotions and thoughts around it. The internet has been great in so many ways but it has also created a sort of collective consciousness, many words have been loaded up with toxic baggage. I like to talk about breaking a sub, but I don't mean it in the way you keep hearing it, the way the last 20 toxic people have used it.

 TeaMenthe