The Entitlement Trap: How Men Fail to See Us I am not a fantasy fulfillment center, your emotional sponge, or your boredom antidote. I’ve made it clear who I am, written it plainly, repeatedly. And yet, they come—male subs and, even worse, self-proclaimed male “Doms” have joined the clown parade—storming into My inbox like a wounded animal with no understanding of boundaries and the reading comprehension of a damp rock. When you disregard what Women have written, you reveal yourself completely. You show us that you aren’t interested in who we are, what we value, or what we seek. We become nothing more than an object, a projection of your desires, a tool for you to manipulate. You see us not as a person, not as a Dominant, not as a Woman—you see us as a machine you can shove entitlement into, expecting Kink to fall out. “Don’t you want to hurt me?” No. I don’t know you. I don’t owe you pain, attention, or even a reply. I am not a performing sadist here to validate your masochistic thirst just because you barked a question in My direction. You wouldn’t walk up to a stranger on the street and ask them to slap you—so why do you think your fetish excuses your idiocy? Sadism is not a random service I provide—it is a curated gift, earned through trust, connection, and respect. The fact that you think it can be summoned just because you asked tells me all I need to know about your understanding of power exchange: It revolves solely around your needs and desires, not the Dynamic. And the male “subs” aren’t faring any better. If I see one more “I want to be used” message, I’m going to invoice you for the eye-roll damage. What does that even mean? Used for what? Used by whom? You think submission is about shoving yourself into the space of a Dominant and demanding to be handled like a toy off the shelf? Let me be clear: I want My car detailed. I want My feet rubbed. I want obedience, peace, and a soul that knows how to listen. If your idea of submission doesn’t include actual service, you’re not submitting—you’re just loitering with an erection and hoping I won’t notice how useless you are. This isn’t just about Me, though. I speak from My own experience, but this issue spreads far beyond My circle. Women, all over this community, make their desires clear. We list them. We outline our expectations. We do the work. And yet, time and again, we are ignored. Why? Because too many men—whether Dominant or submissive—can’t even do the bare minimum: read, respect, recognize that we are not here to be consumed. If you treat a Woman like a kink dispenser, you forfeit the privilege of being near Her power. If you ignore what She says, begging for what you want, you’ve already shown that you’re not a true submissive. You’re just a taker wearing a leash. You are not owed our time. You are not entitled to our attention. And until you learn to see us as human beings—fully realized, fully autonomous, and utterly uninterested in pandering to your ego—you will remain where you belong: Outside the circle. Unchosen. And completely forgotten.

If your idea of “servitude” is living under my roof, eating my food, and draining my energy, you’re not a slave—you’re a bum.

A LESSON IN DECAY The Sacramento BDSM scene is broken, and I have no intention of sticking around to watch it rot. Racism here isn’t just a problem—it’s the foundation. The scene is unapologetically white, willfully ignorant, and utterly hostile to change. Instead of creating space for diversity, it props up uneducated white people who have no business speaking on race. Panels on inclusivity led by those who couldn’t define the word if their lives depended on it? Spare me. The lack of self-awareness is almost impressive, as is the scene’s refusal to listen to those who might actually bring meaningful change. And while we’re at it: autism—or any other condition—is not a free pass to be a jerk. Time and time again, I’ve seen people weaponize their neurodivergence to excuse cruelty and blatant disrespect. Accountability is not ableist; it’s necessary. If you can’t handle the bare minimum of treating others with decency, perhaps community spaces aren’t for you. As for misogyny, it thrives here under the guise of 'acceptance.' Dominant Women are reduced to either unattainable fantasies or disposable nuisances. Respect isn’t given—it’s begrudgingly handed out, and only to those who conform to expectations. Strong Women are dismissed, fetishized, or outright ignored. Sacramento is not a place where Female Dominants flourish; it’s where they are forced to fight for every ounce of respect. Accountability in this scene? Laughable. Predators are protected, boundaries are trampled, and harm is ignored for the sake of keeping things 'comfortable.' They wonder why their scene is in constant disarray, why members come and go without looking back. Here’s the truth: your collapse isn’t coming from some outside force. It’s coming from within, from the rotten people you refuse to deal with. The contrast with other communities couldn’t be more glaring. In Toronto, for example, there is genuine space for Women—especially Dominant Women. Community elders hold people to high standards, ensuring safety and respect for everyone involved. They don’t let bad behavior slide. They don’t coddle ignorance. They set the tone, and the result is a thriving, vibrant community. Sacramento could learn from this if it weren’t so deeply committed to the status quo. What sealed my decision to leave wasn’t just the systemic issues; it was the personal betrayals. Friends—at least, people I thought were friends—couldn’t even bother to check in when I went quiet. The message was clear: in this community, people care about what you can do for them, not who you are. So, I’m done. I’m taking my play, my power, and my presence somewhere it will be valued. Private spaces, where accountability is enforced, respect is the standard, and ignorance isn’t tolerated. For those who remain: I hope you demand better. But as for me? My peace is sacred, and I refuse to let this scene drain any more of it. Sacramento, your house is crumbling. Fix it, or let it fall. Either way, I’ll be elsewhere—thriving in spaces that deserve me. — The Demoness PS. Please note this is not directed at everyone; just an explanation as to why I will no longer be active in Sacramento.

From Their Cruelty to Our Reign: The Change They Ignited Over 70,000 men recently gathered in a Telegram group to strategize ways to dehumanize and harm women. This isn’t an anomaly—it’s a glimpse into the darkest corners of a society that has long allowed male entitlement to fester, where violence is justified and women’s suffering ignored. These men are not outliers; they are the inevitable product of a system that values men’s power over women’s lives. Women are not safe, and the message is clear: IT IS ALL MEN UNTIL IT IS NONE! This isn’t just about one Telegram group. This is about the larger epidemic—a culture steeped in misogyny, where violence against women is a normality, and those in positions of power either turn a blind eye or remain silent. The same toxic behaviors bleed into the BDSM and kink spaces, where men—dominants and submissives alike—twist the language of consent to mask their entitlement, using women as tools for their own gratification. Within these communities, far too many men overstep, distorting the principles of mutual respect and consensual power exchange into a grotesque manipulation of control. Instead of a space for healthy dominance, women are subjected to verbal abuse, unwanted advances, and coercion. This is not a problem of a few bad apples; it is a deep-seated issue that runs unchecked, masked as kink. Studies confirm this dark truth. A 2022 study in Psychology of Violence revealed that over 40% of women in BDSM activities reported non-consensual behaviors, including assault. Women with male partners in these spaces are 2.5 times more likely to face sexual violence than those outside the community. The structures that claim to uphold consensual dynamics are, in fact, breeding grounds for abuse. Enough. The time for appeasement has passed. I am withdrawing. No more play. No more submissives. No more hollow promises of respect. My energy is mine, and it will no longer be sacrificed for your pleasure. Until men dismantle the culture that feeds this entitlement, I refuse to entertain it. My focus is now on myself and my Sisters—our survival, our healing, our rise. To the men who feel slighted by this withdrawal: your discomfort does not matter. You do not get to claim “not all men” while your brothers continue to perpetuate violence. Your silence is complicity, and your feigned innocence is a lie. You are not exempt. How many boundaries must be disregarded before they are finally respected? A 2021 Lancet Psychiatry study found one in three women worldwide experience physical or sexual violence—and that’s just what is reported. The UNODC recorded 81,000 women murdered in 2020, nearly 47,000 of them at the hands of intimate partners or family.  These aren’t statistics. These are lives erased. In a world where men organize abuse online and platforms feign helplessness, I am done speaking. The question of “how do we stop this violence?” has been drowned out by “not all men” too many times. To the men in that Telegram group, and all like you: your actions have consequences. You’ve built walls of distrust, and no woman will extend you the benefit of the doubt again. This withdrawal is the world you've created. To my Sisters: We are not their playthings. Our worth is not for them to define. Together, we are unstoppable. Let them watch as we rise. Let them feel the power of our unity, our resilience, and our strength. To the 70,000 men and those like them: You are unworthy. Until you dismantle the systems that harm us and truly see us as equals, you will remain outside the sanctum of our lives. We are done enduring. We are done explaining. This is our reckoning. Men, your silence is deafening. Your lack of action is your sentence. To my Sisters: stay vigilant. Stay strong.   References: • The Lancet Psychiatry, 2021. 'Prevalence of physical and sexual violence against women globally.' • United Nations Office on Drugs and Crime (UNODC), 2020. 'Global Study on Homicide.' • Psychology of Violence, 2022. 'Non-consensual behaviors and the risk of sexual violence in BDSM communities.'

Their Endless Wants, My Infinite Disdain For years, I have nurtured a vision—a dream of claiming my own gladiator. A man forged in the fires of discipline and honed by unrelenting purpose. He would be fierce in loyalty, tireless in devotion, and steadfast in service, embodying the kind of strength that bends willingly to my will. Yet, this desire feels like an unattainable relic of a bygone age. The men I encounter today are woefully unprepared to meet even the most basic standards, let alone rise to the level of such an aspiration. “I want to worship your feet” they proclaim. “I want to be whipped, humiliated, degraded”. Want, want, want. It never ends. Yet, not once have they asked, What can I do for Her? What does She need? I am not a faceless entity here to fulfill a checklist of fantasies. I am a being of complex needs, requiring depth, effort, and true servitude—things many men seem wholly incapable of offering. This frustration is not mine alone. Many Female Dominants wrestle with the same entitled behavior, wading through waves of men who approach not as potential servants but as insatiable seekers of self-gratification The Stench of Selfish Submission It is no surprise that this behavior thrives. A 2023 study in Cyberpsychology, Behavior, and Social Networking highlighted how cisgender heterosexual men disproportionately center their desires in interactions, particularly in romantic or sexual contexts. They see others not as people but as conduits for their wants, rarely acknowledging the emotional labor they demand.  In the context of kink, this entitlement manifests as selfish submission. Men approach Female Dominants with endless fantasies but no sense of responsibility, accountability, or effort. They demand attention, forgetting—or perhaps choosing to ignore—that there is a person on the other end of their message, one whose needs far outweigh their indulgent whims. Empty Promises, Empty Hands A slave who cannot introspect, who has not labored to grow emotionally or spiritually, is not a gift; they are a burden. It is no wonder that so many men flounder, blind to this truth. If you cannot keep your word, if you lack the grace to apologize when wrong, if you are unwilling to balance your demands with meaningful contributions, you are not worthy of anyone’s attention. Submission is not free. It requires effort, consistency, and the ability to prioritize another's desires above your own. If you want to serve, then you must bring something of value to the table. Your wants mean nothing if they are not matched by a willingness to work for what you seek. The Hollow Bonds of Modern Men Most men cannot even manage basic friendships, let alone the demands of service. They exist in shallow connections, incapable of depth or emotional vulnerability. According to the American Survey Center, 15% of men report having no close friends at all—a fivefold increase since 1990. Without meaningful relationships, they lack the tools to navigate the complexities of servitude or reciprocity. How can one expect a man who has never learned to connect with another human being to truly understand the gravity of service? These hollow bonds render them unfit, unable to offer anything more than fleeting enthusiasm and empty promises. Reclaiming Sovereignty, Decentering Men My peace, my energy, and my focus cannot be sacrificed to prop up egos that see servitude as a one-sided transaction. Decentering men is not just about protecting myself—it is about reclaiming the balance that so many seem determined to disrupt. To those who wish to serve: take a moment to reassess. Reflect on your approach. Ask yourself if you have the strength to exist in a space where your needs are not the axis upon which everything turns. If you cannot meet this most basic requirement, then do not approach me. The Final Thought To Women who stand in power: we are not vessels for male desire. We are sovereign beings, and our energy is precious. Protect it, demand better, and never settle for less than what you deserve. Citations: 1. Anderson, M. (2023). The Gender Gap in Online Sexual Behavior: Analyzing Power and Desire in BDSM Communities. Cyberpsychology, Behavior, and Social Networking. Retrieved from [https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/26924951.2023.2227020](https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/26924951.2023.2227020?utm_source=chatgpt.com) 2. American Survey Center (2023). The Decline of Male Friendships: The Crisis of Male Social Lives in the U.S. Retrieved from [https://www.americansurveycenter.org/whymenssocialcirclesareshrinking](https://www.americansurveycenter.org/whymenssocialcirclesareshrinking/?utm_source=chatgpt.com)