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petplaything

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Friends:
JoyandPainBassnoirSADEDEGe0rgeSwitchDeviantAngel80

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Service which is rendered without joy helps neither the servant nor the served. But all other pleasures and possessions pale into nothingness before service that is rendered in a spirit of joy.

- Gandhi



With trust, no explanation is necessary. Without trust no explanation is ever enough.

-Unknown


Not to be contrary, but simply to save time and effort for both of us - I will not engage in online, marriedinvolved, or long distancerelocation opportunities. I am on this site to get to know some local people after moving to a new place. And right or wrong, I firmly believe if I cant meet you, I cant possibly know you. And no, video does not count. ) If still interested, please read on!





I was introduced to the concept of Ds in my 20s, and it resonated deeply with me. I am highly submissive, but have only spent about 3-4 years in regular, active practice. (The rest of the time was spent, unused but owned by a married Dom. So again, no married or otherwise involved guys please...Ive honestly paid my dues and more on that front.) I love socializing with people in the lifestyle, as it tends to attract interesting, unusual and open-minded individuals. I enjoy intelligent, funny conversations outside the bedroom. Inside the bedroom, I greatly dislike pain but I really love to please. I have found that I am a rather accomplished maker of floggers, I enjoy blindfolds, collars, mild choking, and restrained aggression. Other than that, my real turn ons are whatever I know turns on my Dom. I deeply want to give what is asked for and even if I dont enjoy what Im asked to do, I tolerate it for as long as I can my drive is substantially derived from the need to obtain His pride and approval, not from what I do to get it.



Im a natural born submissive...but if, in your estimation, that means I am not deserving of an opinion or a brain of my own, then best of luck, but Your Dominance will never suit. Dont get me wrong...for the right Man...his desires and pleasure are my only goal, my deepest wish. I deeply feel my purpose in life is to find the man who will let me serve, please and care for him in every way I possibly can...and His appreciation and affectionate reward for such behavior is the guarantee that keeps it coming. (Doesnt that work nicely?) ) I divorced a few years ago, and moved back to the midwest after living for 10 years in Alaska. Im looking to find out more about the Ds community in the DenverBoulder area.



Im heavy set (I used to say fat, but some people get very up in arms. Whatever, you know what I mean...) I have never been considered very pretty. But, Im very kind, with a wicked sense of humor and an extremely intellectual and analytical mind...usually. I am taking medical treatments which affect my memory and focus, and sometimes I find myself feeling pretty stupid. So full disclosure, Im transiently intellectual and analytical.

I really, truly love to please and obey. Once trust is well established, I have few hard limits...but I cant honestly say where my boundaries lie with activities in which I have no experience. I am currently very gunshy about another actual relationship...and am just looking to educate myself, and make some friends...although maybe someday, for the right Dom...well, never say never...

I wish all who read this luck, and love, and a partner who fulfills the the other side of the Ds equation for them. For I truly think the very best possibility for anyone on this site is to find at least one more person who completes them, fulfills them, and allows them the magic that a truly good Ds relationship can provide. Be safe, be well.

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2/3/2018 7:14:16 AM
Haaaappy birrrrrthdaaaaay tooooo meeeeeeee...againnnnnnnnn...

12/29/2017 7:45:52 AM
Lost someone who meant a lot.  It's been almost two weeks...how do you get rid of this overwhelming ache?  It was casual, I knew it wouldn't last forever...but what I really miss is the friendship.  He was someone who somehow, without trying, made me feel...contented, and calm (but excited at the same time), and not judged.  I don't have other friends in Colorado that come close to it.  But the situation is one that makes maintaining a real friendship, meaning someone I communicate with more than 2-3 text exchanges a year, very difficult.  And so, for all intents and purposes, he is gone.  And I'm having a hell of a time coming to terms. I would like advice, but only from individuals with good intentions.  If you message me, just trying to make me feel bad...I'm already there, so you should probably spend your time where you can get a better ROI.  

2/3/2017 7:54:40 AM
Haaaappy birrrrrthdaaaaay tooooo meeeeeeee...

1/6/2017 9:04:05 AM
"Calm down.  Willie Nelson is just a normal guy, who happens to sing and play guitar."  "No, he's not!  You take that back!!"

11/12/2016 10:36:22 PM

“Think of your protest like sex…you can be loud and wild, and do it all night long…but when something starts to burn, you should probably stop.”


11/3/2016 7:24:36 AM
"You should read CS Lewis's book on grief.  It's not as fun as the Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe series, but it's still pretty good..."

10/22/2016 6:50:33 AM

You -

attempt to own patriotism, claiming that only the people who think EXACTLY like you love this country, and anyone who has the audacity to hold other thoughts is disgusting and traitorous. Yet you loudly assert that our government is thoroughly inept and corrupt, our democratic election process is rigged and worthless. You, the one who thinks our accomplishments in science and space exploration are hoaxes, and that our understanding of things from a cosmic to a molecular level are an attack on your sky wizard beliefs. You, the one who maintains that abortions are wrong and women who seek them should be legally punished, have told women pregnant with your children to abort. And you...the one whom in less than a month's time will loudly plaintively cry about how it was all a fraud and the election was stolen from you, while simultaneously demonizing the whole country for being too stupid to elect you.  You know...like the blacks and the Mexicans and Iowans...

...also, there is no god and gmo's are safe. 🖕🏻



10/19/2016 1:02:49 AM
"Man up!  Or at least lady down a bit..."

10/17/2016 9:36:49 AM
"What if we pumped her stomach?  I've had my stomach pumped before, I think I can figure it out..."

10/10/2016 9:31:59 AM
Can't think of a time I've felt more disconnected.

9/16/2016 8:02:47 AM
RIP, Caligul80831.  (And Caligula80631.)  I only wish you had been more honest...


4/17/2016 1:08:19 AM
"What's up?" "Trying to get drunk enough to have sex with a vegan..."

2/6/2016 7:23:43 AM
LOL - so when I went in to work tonight, there was not 1, not 2...but 3 containers of sushi with my name on it.  If this is the return on my investment, feel free to steal my lunch anytime!

2/4/2016 6:21:06 AM
How rude.

Since yesterday was my birthday, I decided to treat myself.  I work overnights, so when I went in last night I stopped first to get some sushi to bring for "lunch" (or whatever you'd call a 2am middle-of-the-shift-meal).  I got to work, and left it in the break room next to a cupcake someone gave me and my coffee mug.  To be fair, there was a welcome potluck going on, so there was other food out and about, but mine was separated.

I go on break a few hours later, walk into the break room...it's gone.  I look in the fridge in case someone moved it...not there.  "Did anyone see my sushi?"  "...Oh, that was yours?  I thought it was for everybody."   

SO YOU ATE THE WHOLE THING?!?  *sigh*  I was looking forward to my birthday sushi, too...

12/4/2015 2:32:49 PM
"You didn't win, you lucked out."
"Luck doesn't just drop into your lap, you've got to force it there!"

12/3/2015 5:14:49 AM
"I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're goin', and hook up with them later."

9/20/2015 7:15:45 PM
I'm a realist.  If life gives you lemons...you probably just found some lemons.

4/30/2015 7:05:30 AM
A skeleton walks into a bar, and says "I need a beer and a mop."

4/28/2015 4:13:29 AM
An undeclared evil of the crockpot - spent 7 hours slow cooking a pork roast with garlic and onion, then threw in carrots and potatoes for another couple hours...looks wonderful, but now I'm not hungry. Dammit...

4/3/2015 5:44:48 AM
"I hate ebooks.  They don't have the smell, the feel, of the real thing."  
"Yes, the old way is just like horses...let's all go back to riding them to work."  


3/24/2015 7:58:33 AM
"And I thought to myself then...'There is one I could follow. There is one I could call King'." 

3/23/2015 1:43:32 AM
Consent - seems hard for some people to grasp.  It shouldn't be, it's a simple concept...it's the same for everything from sexual acts to asking someone if they'd like a cup of tea.

  • If you say, “Hey, would you like a cup of tea?” and they go, “OMG, fuck yes, I would fucking LOVE a cup of tea! Thank you!” Then you know they want a cup of tea.

-If you say, “Hey, would you like a cup of tea?” and they um and ahh and say, “I’m not really sure…” then you can make them a cup of tea or not, but be aware that they might not drink it, and if they don’t drink it then — this is the important bit — don’t make them drink it. You can’t blame them for you going to the effort of making the tea on the off chance they wanted it; you just have to deal with them not drinking it. Just because you made it doesn’t mean you are entitled to watch them drink it.

-If they say, “No, thank you,” then don’t make them tea. At all. Don’t make them tea, don’t make them drink tea, don’t get annoyed at them for not wanting tea. They just don’t want tea, okay?

-They might say, “Yes, please, that’s kind of you,” and then when the tea arrives they actually don’t want the tea at all. Sure, that’s kind of annoying as you’ve gone to the effort of making the tea, but they remain under no obligation to drink the tea. They did want tea, now they don’t. Sometimes people change their mind in the time it takes to boil that kettle. And it’s okay for people to change their mind, and you are still not entitled to make them drink it even though you went to the trouble of making it.

-If they are unconscious, don’t make them tea. Unconscious people don’t want tea and can’t answer the question, “Do you want tea?” because they are unconscious.

-Okay, maybe they were conscious when you asked them if they wanted tea, and they said yes, but in the time it took you to boil that kettle, they are now unconscious. You should just put the tea down, make sure the unconscious person is safe, and — this is the important bit — don’t make them drink the tea. 

 -If someone said yes to tea, started drinking it and then passed out before they’d finished it, don’t keep on pouring it down their throat. Take the tea away and make sure they are safe.  Because unconscious people don’t want tea. Trust me on this.

-If someone said “yes” to tea around your house last Saturday, that doesn’t mean that they want you to make them tea all the time. They don’t want you to come around unexpectedly to their place and make them tea and force them to drink it going, “BUT YOU WANTED TEA LAST WEEK,” or to wake up to find you pouring tea down their throat going “BUT YOU WANTED TEA LAST NIGHT.”


3/21/2015 11:28:46 PM
"No way I'm going to that twat waffle's party..."

3/17/2015 5:43:29 AM
"Support the troops, have sex in groups."

3/15/2015 10:50:00 PM
"You just know high heels had to be invented by a MAN...because women never invented anything!"

3/15/2015 6:01:10 PM
"Act like you belong and the world is your oyster!"  "Oh, gross! Can't the world be my noodles and butter?"

2/14/2015 4:28:19 AM
Ah, found an excellent followup dentist.  Since my waking nightmare, and with the coming of Feb 14 and the vanilla rush to see and interpret 50 Shades of Bullshit, I've been thinking more than normal about masochism and sadism.  I understand how the desire for both power and pain would mix to some extent in a lot of Dominants.  I have absolutely no ability to really understand masochism on any level, there is nothing about pain I find enjoyable.  That does not mean I am unwilling to endure certain levels of it...I am very fond of bites and bruises and welts, and those don't come without a physical sensation that most would describe as at least a bit painful.  I also know that some Doms enjoy the endurance, the sharply inhaled breath, the small whimpers, the obvious effort and struggle to do what is told, the obedience that comes with some effort.  But to actually enjoy it...no judgement (honestly, at times envious), but I really don't get that shit at all.  

:)

Oh, and as far as 50 shades...the books pissed me off, no plans to watch the movie. Run of the mill, not terribly imaginative, repetitive girly erotica, normally I'd not care one way or the other.  But the characters are in BDSM because of abuse and damage, and it's something they need to be "saved from".  It's actually anti-BDSM erotica.  It just pisses me off that the public at large consumes it and thinks they have learned something real about this lifestyle.  Not to say I know everything about it...or much of anything, really.  But I know what it ain't...and it ain't that crap!!  (Grammatical faux pas intentional, no need for correction emails.)  ;)

2/4/2015 10:16:29 PM
What a weird day.  Worked overnight, came home to strong and stinky but rather warm wind.  Two hours later, while looking out the window at the driving snow and holding a pen in my mouth, my bicuspid cracked in half.  Went to a dentist (with the sun shining and a lot of the snow already gone), and ended up having the worst experience I've ever had in the chair.  And that's saying something.  (I've had quite a lot of dental work - many fillings as a kid, several root canals and crowns, all wisdom teeth pulled, an extraction and 3 tooth bridge.)   When they told me the tooth had to be pulled but they'd use only novocaine, I had a bad feeling...I should have heeded it.  The roots broke off, and it took him 2 hours, digging and twisting and cracking, pulling until his hands shook.  I also wasn't completely numb until the last 15 minutes or so...I'd spent a good 45 minutes openly crying and shaking, but because I wasn't feeling "sharp pain", they said there wasn't anything they could do.  I had to get out of the chair and threaten to leave and find an oral surgeon to knock me out before they decided to give me a more potent novocaine, and give the shots directly into the gum and hard palate.  After that, it was a breeze, I could have taken that for another two hours...but it went quickly after that.  However, he forgot the bone graft he "strongly advised" me to get.  And he told me it was good to get it done right during the same procedure as the extraction, because it would be 1/3 the cost.  By the time they figured out the error, I'd been there forever and he was with another patient, so they sent me home and told me they'll call tomorrow.  Whee, I can't wait...I must say, I found myself thinking about masochism while staring at the ceiling, gripping the chair arms.  I wished to whatever that I could have found what was happening the least bit erotic or enjoyable...but it SO was not...

I really wish I didn't have to ever go back to this guy, but they had me sign an estimate that said I'd get a bone graft for $300, and I am pretty sure I'd never get any other dentist to honor that price, much less a GOOD dentist.  If anyone has any advice on how to muster the courage to go back in that place...feel free.  :)



2/4/2015 4:01:25 AM
No fair.  If I live in the middle of Denver, then the wind has absolutely no right to reek of a giant feed lot!  That's one of the reasons I got the hell out of South Dakota!

2/3/2015 4:42:42 AM
Happy birthday to meeee...


1/24/2015 8:42:01 AM
And suddenly, so hollow...

1/24/2015 2:39:33 AM
So surreal...the countdown to the final goodbye of a best friend.  The cancer ravaged his whole tiny body before giving any sign it was there. 5 1/2 hours left with my beloved pup Grif...watching him sleep, knowing it's time but wishing I could have done more.

12/31/2014 4:04:25 AM
"Do you have a great confidence in your pussy, or is this just vaginal hubris?"


12/24/2014 2:35:00 AM
"Regrets are for horseshoes and handbags."

12/1/2014 2:03:47 AM
In the wee small hours of the morning...

12/1/2014 12:21:44 AM
God, vanillas are so cute.  Someone posted a photo on Facebook...raised platform bed, with a cage underneath.  The post labeled it as an "interesting storage idea".  A couple speculated it's for housing a baby, so it's not so hard to get out of bed at night.  A couple figured it was for the dog.

Noobs...

8/10/2014 2:51:13 PM
"I'm terrified...but I'm totally erect. " Alex 'Tig' Trager

8/10/2014 11:56:24 AM
At what point can we all agree to change the name of Sons of Anarchy to "You Gotta Be Kidding Me, Jesus Christ, What Now?"

8/5/2014 6:49:15 PM
If a guy is weak, he is called a "pussy".  If a guy is strong, he has a "lot of balls".  Can someone explain this to me?  Seeing as how a pussy is built to take a pounding, but balls run and hide if you tap them wrong? 

(Although, I do admit, when a guy gets whiny, one of my favorite put-downs is, "Awwww, did someone get sand in their vagina?")

8/4/2014 3:36:11 PM
"This is why I beat hookers..."  Alex 'Tig' Trager

7/31/2014 11:54:02 AM
We don't choose who we desire; love chooses us.

7/25/2014 3:26:57 PM
Am I honestly supposed to believe the group who guards the galaxy includes an Ent and a raccoon?  Does anyone else find this off-putting?

7/8/2014 8:10:36 AM
Guess who has two thumbs, and finally got internet access in the new apartment?

6/2/2014 4:33:20 PM

Getting my learnin' on!


5/31/2014 2:10:02 PM
Interesting...buying legal weed still feels naughty. :)

5/24/2014 12:57:54 AM

I got a little exposure to a violet wand this evening, by a very kind and knowledgable Domme.  Can't decide if I like it or not...I guess further investigation is warranted.  :)


4/20/2014 7:42:56 PM

People on this site keep leaving the meanest messages.  "Bullshit".  "Fake".   You know what?  That shit is painful.  If you don't like what I have to say, that's fine, everyone has a right to their opinion.  But there's no reason to be an asshole about it.  If you don't believe me, just ignore me.  Please don't ruin my day.  


4/17/2014 7:44:14 PM

"With trust, no explanation is necessary.  Without trust no explanation is ever enough." 

-Unknown

 

"Service which is rendered without joy helps neither the servant nor the served.  But all other pleasures and possessions pale into nothingness before service that is rendered in a spirit of joy."

-Mahatma Ghandi


4/16/2014 7:29:24 AM

OK, call me a grammar nazi, but it's driving me crazy, and I'm trying to be helpful here...

DOMINANT VS DOMINATE

If you are a characteristic, trait, or gene...you are DominaNT.  If you are a PERSON, you are a DominaNT.  

What a Dominant person DOES...is DominaTE.  

Thank you, and have a good day.

Pet...out!  


4/14/2014 10:55:13 AM

Got a message from someone, telling me they wanted me to fly to where they live and be their slave.  This was from their profile...cut and pasted...

 

"im looking for a honest and serius no limit slave
i have trayd a loot of shit on a nother site so dont contact me if your not serius
and as there sadly are so manny unserious pepole online
then my new slave got to be willing to come here on her one expense thats basic all i ask once she is here then ill of course pay all she will need here."


OK, so I am a true sub.  I really am.  But the bratty part of me just wants to write back and say, "What the hell, dude?  Are YOU serious?!?  That profile is a joke, right??  If you read mine...what in the world makes you think any of that hot mess would pique my interest????"


But I think instead, maybe I just won't reply.  ;)  


4/8/2014 12:58:18 PM

I had a not so great experience recently.  Met a Dom online, spent some time texting, calling and emailing back and forth, exchanged a great deal of information.  Everything seemed extremely compatible.  We met, things continued, then once we played...everything went sideways.  He refused to even acknowledge that anything changed for him.  He disappeared and has broken off contact, and I'm still really don't understand what happened.  I did not identify a point at which his desire turned to..."meh.  Never mind."  But it certainly seemed to.
After he left, I found a chess piece on the sidewalk nearby.  A rook, to be exact. I'm sure he did not leave it, but as far as coincidences go, it felt rather poignant.  I picked it up, and I keep it on my computer when I visit these sites now.  It reminds me...although I may decline to play myself, and in fact try to avoid it...these sites, and a lot of the people on them, consciously or not, are engaged in a game.  It's strategy and calculation...and in any game...the goal is never to have the other person win...
So if any gamers are reading this...would you mind moving on, and jerking someone else around, please?  I long to be with all kinds of interesting people, doing all kinds of things (try to keep your head out of the gutter there, lol).  But dealing with phoniness and awkward, untruthful communication is just...exhausting.  And hurtful.  And I really don't see the point.  But I do have faith that there are earnest individuals to be found, I just have to deal with the fact that I may have to wade through a lot of d-bags on the way to discovering them.  ;)


4/8/2014 4:36:05 AM

So, I try to be nice, but sometimes on this site, I find it hard (no pun intended).  ;)  I had a message from someone who said they were "the perfect Dominate" for me.  Now what the hell do you say to that?!?  How do you kindly reply, "How can you be perfect at something you can't even pronounce/spell correctly?"

 

Or am I just being a bitch?


2/22/2014 3:51:36 PM

I think many people come into this life, looking for a shortcut.  A guy wants a girl to just do what he wants and then shut up...hey, that's a sub, right?  A girl comes in, not wanting to work, looking for a sugar daddy...if she has sex in the manner he asks, that should be enough to "earn her keep", right?  No matter what labels you put on it, or what community you operate in, the guy's a misogynist and the girl is a gold digger.  There are NO SHORTCUTS to be found in this lifestyle.  There is a possible path to a much higher, deeper physical and mental connection with the right partner(s).  That path also requires work, sacrifice, respect, thought and consideration.  

 

So for my own part...if you're a guy, and I described you in that first sentence, best of luck to you, but you should swiftly move on to the next profile.  :)


2/1/2014 8:41:52 AM

File under WTF.  Woke up, looked on Facebook, clicked on a video link...unintentionally watched a puppy snuff film.  Literally.  A girl was flinging puppies into the river, and the caption of the video said that it was horrible the girl was throwing them into the water for fun.  But in the 10 years I worked as a vet tech, I raised between 200-300 orphaned puppies and kittens.  You can hear the puppies in the video...they are young, still blind and deaf.  No way they can swim.  I don't know if the person who posted realized that...maybe they thought it was cruel, but the puppies would just swim to shore.  Uh...no.  

 

Ugh, what a fucked up way to start a day.  Almost as bad as when I scratched my cornea in the middle of the night a couple days ago...but bad in a different way.  If either of these things, puppy snuff films or scratching a submissive's corneas, are anything that turn you on or excite you in any way, you may know right now that we are NOT going to have a very good time chatting, and you may feel free not to extend the invitation.

 

Pet...out!  :)


1/29/2014 7:38:18 AM

When I logged on a bit ago, the "random profile" on the home page was a Domme, who said she was a "certified specialist".  Uh...I'm sorry...where did you receive your "certification" in Domination?  Was there a test?  What is the organization issuing the certificate? (I'm afraid it's very possible that you've been scammed.  I'm guessing that was NOT an accredited college...)

But whatever! Good on ya!  Contrats on your piece of paper and somewhat strange, narcissitic attitude.  Hope it works out for you, and someone else!  

 

;)


1/25/2014 8:34:53 AM

I just got the meanest email from a user here.  "Good luck, loser".  I don't even know the guy who sent it...I recognize the picture as one that was just "there" when I logged in a while ago, so maybe I viewed his profile once?  And for that huge transgression, I receive a hurtful insult?  Wow, I think this is going to be a very bad day.  :(


1/23/2014 4:07:52 PM

"The sorcerer spoke, and I heard a voice answer his call..."


1/9/2014 11:52:27 PM

OK, so, I know this is a site for an "alternative sexual lifestyle".  Have to say, that's not really my focus at this point.  Right now, I'd be happy to find some people who might have some interesting thoughts, and may desire to convey them to others in a friendly and logical manner.  Perhaps even on a regular basis.  

 

Quite frankly, I'm moving back from a place of significant affluence, and phoniness.  (Is that even a word?  If not...you know what I mean.)  It's been a while since I was around many people with sharp minds, open viewpoints and good senses of humor.  There was a pretty healthy BDSM community in a town I lived in a few years ago, and while not all of the individuals were people I would want for friends, there was a smaller "group within a group".  They made for great brunches and smaller munches.  Friendly people, stimulating conversation, bright wit, warmth, and now and then a hostess proudly wearing her newly-purchased whalebone corset, or a host kneeling and kissing his guests' feet as we departed. :)  I miss it, on so many levels.  I hate to say it, because it makes me feel like a snob but...to intentionally misquote The Sixth Sense:  "I see stupid people everywhere.  They don't even know they're stupid..."


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BNut
 
 Age: 25
  Georgia