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Recent Journal Entries

11/30/21 at 4:32 PM

Ordered hormones today, will be a few weeks before they are in. Once I start again hope to become owned before hormone effect are to noticeable by family And people at work.


11/30/21 at 3:18 PM

I just got the official from my doctor and I am not officially "healed". The fucking dick has no fucking clue what he is talking about. I still have aches and pains from just standing up. I went from in fucking good shape to what I feel is a bloated whale. And my endurance is total crap. After 2 flights of stairs, I am now winded.

 

As for my business, it's gone. All of it. No more tools, or materials. I was even forced to sell off my "personal collection" of goodies. As for my clients, They have found other 'artists' and 'makers'.

 

Ladies and gentlemen, I have now hit rock bottom.

 

 

So what am I looking for I am looking for an artist. Someone who feels they are up for the challenge (and bragging rights). Some knows the ins and outs of social situations as well as proper etiquette in different circles.  Someone who is willing and able to invest their time, talent, money, knowledge etc to make it happen.

 

The challenge,

Take this currently out of shape male, with lacking social skills and has not started their transition yet.  Then through training, diet exercise, surgeries, lessons, transform him into a proper walking talking sex goddess. To remove every trace of ever being a male from the body and mannerisms. To transform so far that unless another was told they would never even suspect that the lady next to them was born a male.

 

I know something like this is a commitment in both time and money. As such, I do have skills in making and building that can be used. As I transition and look more feminine,  I am willing to be a cam girl or what not. To be by your side as an assistant and maybe more. After the transition, I am more than happy to be a beta dom in your dungeon, or who knows what we can come up with.

 

Here I am a living flesh piece of clay, looking to be transformed into the 'perfect' woman. To live the life I know I was meant to be living.  Help me and in return I can help you.

 

Send me a message if you are interested.


11/30/21 at 2:57 PM

A lesson on the proper way to address any Superior Domme

Honorifics are a privilege, calling anyone Mistress is a gift, and not a given, and yet I have to remind almost every submissive who contacts me of this fact. boys and girls you MUST ask the person you are contacting how they would like to be addressed, this is submission 101! It is a respectful and kind thing to do, it show that you, in your first message, desire to follow and not lead.

I do not identify with the word mistress, the word has so many historical threads that I just don't want to be associated with. So if you would like to know how to address me. you may call me Mx Willow or Sir. Mx is a gender neutral prefix, I like the way it sounds, like mix. I like to play with gender as you may have taken notice in my profile and so I also love to be addressed as sir, no I was not asigned male at birth, I just like to make you uncomfortable, and many of you have said that you do feel real uncomfortable called a feminized person sir. I love power, sir is a powerful honorific and my use of it is a power move, don't you think? I do.

I am still searching for submissive to serve me 247 in a TPE LTR remember I am non monogamous but I expect you to be chase to me. I want to lock you up in chasitity and proudly wear the key around my neck with a hand full of others.


Good evening

MxW


https://open.spotify.com/track/2Fxmhks0bxGSBdJ92vM42m?si=93d1f2582e0c4638


Yeah I'm the bad guy.


11/30/21 at 2:19 PM

I'm thinking about piercing my cock, thoughts?


11/30/21 at 2:16 PM

Looking for new fun ideas. 


11/30/21 at 1:37 PM

Master has all but abandoned me

basically


He does not summon me

He does not give me orders, other than to be silent

and to stop being a pain in the butt


i miss Master


the 14 years i was without Him i had someone to help me through it


it is just me


and i know i will be journaling


11/30/21 at 1:17 PM

It amazes me the number of men who keep multiple profiles in order to harass when they get rejected and blocked.  Does having the last word really mean that much after one is blocked?

 

The way I see it....if they can't control themselves there is no way I want them in control of me....EVER.  it doesn't look bad on me what-so-ever. People need to think before they log on to that second account just to harass and have that last word.  This bitch ain't afraid to report members.

 

If I tell you no thanks and to move on.....just do it and shut up.

 

 

 

 


11/30/21 at 1:12 PM

Seeking long term ,  I would like if she was slutty for me.


11/30/21 at 12:57 PM

Now playing using Emlalock.com website


11/30/21 at 11:58 AM

celibacy has been sad


11/30/21 at 11:50 AM

 

Einstein once said: "The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.” For the record: I diligently play the power ball lottery: and over time: you cannot believe the number of single losing tickets that I have bought. Some of the tickets: only the power ball its self has ever paid off. Never all six numbers have matched on the same voucher.  Yet I still infrequently buy one ticket at a time in hopes that all six numbers will ultimately pay off. Am I smart? “NO”; but I am still persistent. I have faith with no real evidence that something good is going to happen. And if it never does: I still believe in God and have conviction that he will not let me down. The New Testament Bible will tell you that "Faith is the substance or assurance of things we hope for, but have not yet received”. Sometimes: faith is all that we have.


11/30/21 at 11:45 AM

In the interest of improving my domestic service, I have listed my chore calendar.  This is a schedule I have developed and used, but it is only a template to be improved upon.  I would of course modify this in any way necessary to meet the requirements of a service based relationship.

Domestic Chore Calendar

Daily Mornings

  • Make beds
  • Organize and tidy bedrooms and bathrooms
  • Organize and tidy kitchen and living areas
  • Unload dishwasher

Daily Evenings

  • Organize and tidy bedrooms and bathrooms
  • Organize and tidy kitchen and living areas
  • Do dishes
  • Wipe down kitchen counters and table
  • Sweep kitchen
  • Take out all trash

Weekly

  • Monday: Dust/polish furniture and window sills and clean interior windows
  • Tuesday: Deep clean floors (sweep/vacuum/mop)
  • Wednesday: Deep clean bathrooms (mirrors/counters/sinks/showers/tubs)
  • Thursday: Deep clean kitchen (counters/sinks) and organize kitchen storage
  • Friday: Grocery shopping
  • Saturday: Laundry and change linens
  • Sunday: Monthly chore

Monthly

  • First week: Clean all kitchen/laundry appliances (refrigerator/stove/oven/microwave/dishwasher/laundry)
  • Second week: Polish furniture and kitchen/bathroom cabinets
  • Third week: Organize garage and patios
  • Fourth week: Yearly chore

Yearly

  • January: Deep clean and organization of bedroom furniture and all closets
  • February: Deep clean and organization of all bathroom drawers/cabinets
  • March: Deep clean and organization of all kitchen drawers/cabinets
  • April: House external and external window cleaning
  • May: Deep clean of all doors/walls/mouldings/blinds/curtains
  • June: Deep clean and organization of garage and patios
  • July: Deep clean and organization of bedroom furniture and all closets 
  • August: Deep clean and organization of all bathroom drawers/cabinets
  • September: Deep clean and organization of all kitchen drawers/cabinets
  • October: House external and external window cleaning
  • November: Deep clean of all doors/walls/mouldings/blinds/curtains
  • December: Clean behind refrigerator/laundry and take rugs for cleaning

 


11/30/21 at 10:37 AM

Hello all seekers... This is just a note to say Thank you to all who have taken the time to read our (long and detailed) profile. We are seeking Long Term so We feel that taking a few minutes to read a profile completely is a small sacrifice indeed for a hopeful applicant..

We also want to say that if We have looked at your profile, that is exactly what We have done: LOOKED at it to determine if there might be some commonalities. LOOKING does not mean that We will contact you  so please don't get all butthurt if We look but don't write.

Meanwhile, if you sense a  potential connection, we invite you to drop Us a note of more than one word or one sentence and We will see how things work out.

Best wishes to all.




11/30/21 at 10:26 AM

Fine dining before or after anal?


11/30/21 at 10:10 AM

How much are we really of our profile


11/30/21 at 9:00 AM

obedient athletic servant ...hard working ...likes to satisfy 


11/30/21 at 8:52 AM

OK sorry black text black back ground!

It will be fixed

Why are some folks so dam rude

Said hello and wass blocked????????????


11/30/21 at 8:49 AM

Tried  to  update  profile  and  everything  disapeard . I  am  still  under  Trainer  Linda  supervision  although  got  permission  to  check  messages  till  Dec  9th. Trainer  Linda  is  a  Pony  Trainer  and  I  did  attend   few  of  those.  Five  4  legged   Pony  Camps  and  One  2  legged  Pony  Camp  which  I  did  not  completed.  I  suppose  to  try  again  next  year.

I  am  still  looking  for  New  Owner   who  would  keep  training/using  this  sub  anyway  and  anyhow  accordingly.

sub  is  honest  humble  very  submissive  and  very  ready  to  improve  and  push  the  limits.


11/30/21 at 5:05 AM

I'm sorry to my lover.

I'm sorry I'm so unrefined;

to leave all the things we had

behind.

No one has a smile

For a ship sinking a mile,

Or a satellite gone astray.

So I say.

I sow sorries.

Across these distances;

I should have stayed in your

embraces, 

liberating me. I know you wanted

to save me and hold me -

wash my sins away.

But I run away.

So you say.

No one can be our witness,

No one can understand us.

And when we misunderstand

each other we become pointless.

I am not saying I know why.

I am not saying

I can justify or rectify a goodbye.

But I already miss you and

these sorries are bearing a cost.

I am so lost without you,

And feel my sorries are pointless, too.


-dirtydarling


11/30/21 at 4:05 AM

Things are changing , so this search is now on hold for a period of time, no idea how long


11/30/21 at 3:49 AM

i can receive messages now


11/29/21 at 10:57 PM

Smack that.


11/29/21 at 10:42 PM

I found love here once. And older Master, older than I thought I would ever go for but I did and I fell for him. I gave my all to him. We texted every day. Spole on Skype when we could. He would visit me when he came up this way and I visited him. 

My heart could not have been more full of joy and happiness. 

But after several years of this back and forth, he was in Michigan visiting his daughter and was over come with pnumonia and Covid. The Tuesday before Thanksgiving 2021 that wonderful man passed away and my heart broke.

It is hard to come back to this place. To write these words of him being gone from this now much darkened world. 

Many have asked what it is I seek. I seek a light. Someone who can make my world shine again. Someone who might one day put the pieces of my shattered heart back together. 

RIP MageWarrior


11/29/21 at 10:10 PM

Is the journal working now???


11/29/21 at 9:55 PM

WhatsApp video call or zoom prior meet is requires.


11/29/21 at 7:16 PM

Ok look if u are a convicted felon I do not want anything to.do with u ok point blank sorry but that is that!!!


11/29/21 at 4:39 PM

People who have strong opinions tend to know what they want and how to get it. They work out the right direction, and then do whatever they need to do to ensure they don't meander from the path. Well... that's the theory anyway. But in reality, everyone has to deal with forks in the road that make decisions difficult. 


11/29/21 at 4:38 PM

YAY! The profile editing works!!

I just kept pasting pieces a little at a time to determine what it was to which the site was ing, and eventually, got it figured out. There is also a character linit on profiles now, but it seems, not on journal entries.

If you try to edit your profile and get a page saying you are blocked, it probably means you have too many links or some kind(s) of "forbidden" words in your profile. It let me have two links in my profile, which is fine, because all the links I had are also on where I linked to. If you wanted to have more links on here, you could probably put them in your journal, though you may need to use multiple entries, but really, how many links do you need on here if you are not trying to spam opr scam poeple??

 


11/29/21 at 4:32 PM

The entry directly above this is currently in progress, to see what I am able to post without being blocked by the site.




11/29/21 at 4:24 PM

Superiority for its own sake yet the fear of self absorption.


11/29/21 at 4:10 PM

I am going to say this so people hear again!

Correct me if I'm wrong, but don't you have to COLLAR someone before you DEMAND something of a person. 

Or am I making that up?


11/29/21 at 12:49 PM

Currently looking for new online and/or phone subs or slaves. Complete manipulation and control of another's sexual pleasure is what i'm after. 


11/29/21 at 12:35 PM

May have found a good girl for a change


11/29/21 at 12:11 PM

Some days the whore urge is unbearable


11/29/21 at 11:55 AM

So many men are still posting about women they think are guided by 50 Shades of Grey, without having ever read it. If they did, they would realise that no woman bases relationship expectations on what happens in that book. The main character enjoys some kink play, but both she and the multibillionaire Dom acknowledge that she is NOT a submissive. And, while some women may fantasize about a relationship with a young, handsome, affectionate billionaire, noone is expecting to find it here.



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