Collarspace.com

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hoagie

hoagie - photo 1
hoagie - photo 2
hoagie - photo 3

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Friends:
Binkmalesubntx2004ArchangelMichaelMasterSpinnerTarik
SEGsubruckLeathrdykeDaddyDom101DracoArcane
CallMeMPurpleDaddytaurushornMstrJWMrSmyth

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I can easily be summed up in one word: ECLECTIC. Or to stretch it out a bit, I am your average bi, poly, switch who is a boi to some and a little girl to others. I am passionate about animal rescue, but I'm so not vegetarian. My hobbies are numerous but stretch from geeky, to girlie, and then come full circle at power tools. I am a natural submissive, but I love topping the right people. I am freakishly strong, and love to cuddle.

I get a lot of messages on these sites from people who say that I couldn't possibly know who I am or what I want. That I change faces depending on who I am with. That couldn't be further from the truth. I will be the first to admit, that I am still learning who I am, but the more I learn, the more I realize that it takes more than 2 sides in order to create a 3-dimensional person. The people that I love are okay with that, and I am learning how to be okay with it too.

I could go on forever giving juxtaposing adjectives in an attempt to give you a clear picture of me. Since I am a work in progress, and told by those that love me I am too hard on myself, I will give you the description those who know me most deeply give me. I am kind, generous, smart, funny, silly, sensitive, compassionate, strong, devoted, loyal, cute, passionate, and good. In their eyes, all these different sides of me make up this one, beautiful being. LOL Who wouldn't be loyal to love like that?

I am looking for friends, always. Want to discuss my turn-ons? Become my friend. I only hang out with friends. I only date friends. I only play with friends. The up-shot here is that if you are a kind, decent, non-creepy human being, chances are, I am going to like you.

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2/5/2009 10:53:38 PM
I have a question.... Why are there so many folks here with pictures of themsleves, inside thier cars?  I mean, there is nothing wrong with it.  I just wonder.... if you are going to take a picture of yourselve..... why drage the camera outside and get into the car to do it?  

7/15/2008 9:25:37 PM
There are times that I don't log onto Collarme for days. The reason for that is, more and more often, I reach a point where, if I read one more profile that rants about poser, loosers, and fakes... I am going to puke! You want real? Get off the internet, and into the live seen. Come on folks, this place is for fantasy. What play out on your computer screen is in text... its fiction. Face it, we're all penpals. If you don't like someone's fantasy leave them alone. They aren't hurting you with it. I fancy myself a rockstar and sing in the shower when I am home alone. My wash rag thinks it is my number one fan, groupie, and boy friend, and it is no worse for the wear.
Don't get me wrong folks, I have gotten pulled into the fantasy of on-line romance. I get it, I do, but there is a reason that there is a distinction between real life and the internet.

4/17/2008 3:03:45 PM

I am often suprised by the mail I get here.  I just recieved a good tongue lashing from someone that was thoughtful enough to inform me that I needed to lose a substancial amount of weight.  He believes that there is no way I could serve as a proper submissive or dominant "because of the limitations that arise as a result of (my) level obesity."  When I responded by telling him, "well then, its a good thing that I have lost 90 lbs since this picture was taken."  He went on another tirade about how I needed to get another picture up as soon as possible.  Now, getting a new and more flattering pic of me for this site has been on my to do list for a while.  Now, it is coming off.
The heavier me is staying up!  Look folks, I understand that for some, appearence is important.  Many say that is being shallow.  I don't.  If that is important to you stick by it.  But it isn't important to me.  I want a dominant that wants me because of my devotion and my talents in serving them.  I want a submissive whom I can make melt, because they know they are mine, cherished and safe. 
Yes, I want to be pretty.  And I think that anyone that knows me can tell you that I have my own issues with appearence.  But when it comes down to it, the only person that I have to be pretty for is my counterpart.  And since I don't have one to impress yet, meh.


3/10/2008 10:26:17 AM
I have just been told that I am too sweet and demure to possibly switch successfully.  That I am too timid and gentle.   Mwahahaha... I love it when they don't see me coming.

9/12/2007 2:36:47 PM
You know, it's a sad state affairs when someone wishing you a good day is deemed creepy.
I think it is important to let your friends know that they cross your mind often.  Now I don't always have the time to send fancy e-cards.  But I do try to take time to send them a quick message hoping that their day goes well.  Most of the time it is a statement, not expecting a response.  SOmetimes it is an inqury into how they are doing because I honestly would like to know.
A friend told me that perhaps I should stop because so many take it the wrong way.  But as someone who has felt forgotten before, I can't.  
Those of you who know me have grown used to it.  But for all you new folks about to meet me out there, please take it for what it is.... a friendly gesture. 

8/29/2007 3:48:35 PM

"All I would like in my life, what I wish for so very much, is to someday have the strength and be free of the resentment and anger that I carry around with me like Linus' blanket for just long enough to become one of those people who is better than the worst thing that happens to her.

How I would love to be that woman."  

Elizabeth Wurtzel "Bitch"


8/23/2007 11:04:57 AM
I contend that OW, is a perfectly good safe word.  Now it may not work for some, but I am afraid that it will have to do for now. 
The problem is that I forget my safe word.  And sometimes I remember it, but just can't get it out.My friends have taken great pains to help me modify it so that it works.  And it didn't.
So I have made an executive decision.  OW, is a back up safe word.  And any Dom that doesn't have the mental capacity to remember that it is.... is probably someone that I shouldn't be playing with.  So bring on the beating... just not too hard *grin*



6/15/2007 10:03:57 PM

I had the best day yesterday!  I went to a waterpark with a new friend and we had a blast.  Who ever said a water park is good wholesome fun... didn't use the park to its fullest potential *wink*


6/8/2007 2:47:52 PM

I realize that most of my journal entry's are negative.  But the negative stuff is what I have a hard time wrapping my head around... so I write. 

And what I am trying to wrap my head around is the suicide of a really good dom.   I know they are human... and get overwhelmed by pain.  And it has to be ten times harder for a dom to ask for help with that.  At least I think it would be, just because of the way they are wired.  And I know doing the responsible thing isnt
any easier for them.  But that is the trade off, isn't it?  He loved his sub. He had pain and problems but god he loved his sub.  I don't understand how this happens.

I don't expect anyone to explain this to me... I'm not sure anyone can.  This isn't something that I think anyone can get there head around... especially his sub. 

But I think this needs to be said.  He was a good man.  He loved his sub, and was wonderful to those around him.   And in all my rantings about doms, even with this, he was good.
 


5/3/2007 5:45:06 AM
Ok, I realize I am a big girl, but no I am not named for a sandwich.  I got the nickname Hoagie in college.  It seems I am freakishly strong and Hoagie became a shortened version of Hulk Hogan.  So please stop contacting me with food references.

On a happy note, I went to my first play party last Saturday.  It was a blast.  I am normally very shy and unsure in party setting, but the folks there were wonderful.  They wouldn't let me sink into the wallpaper.  Every room I drifted to, someone noticed me and struck up a conversation.  And oh the things I learned and saw... *giggle*.  I even got played a little.  It was very mild, and it was grand.  I noticed several people from this website there too.  So incase the host of the party is on here... thank you very much for your kind words and hospitality.

4/11/2007 8:16:39 AM
Gender is a funny thing.  We use the terms male and female to catagorize and deliniate so many things.  Restrooms, clothing, schools,  electrical connections... and to be honest, I don't get.
I am often asked why I am bi.  And more often than that, I have had it assumed that it's because I want more dates, or need both genders.  Actually, I don't.  And for the record, being bi gets you fewer dates, not more.
I am bi because the gender simply doesn't matter to me.  I care nothing for appearence.  Who a person is so drascticaly affects what I see when I look at someone, that if I get to know you, before I lay eyes on you, it is almost impossible  for me to  say whether or not someone will find you attractive or not.  For instance: Tom Selek... yuk!  My friend that hugs me whether I need it or not... TOTAL HOTTIE!!  And for me, gender is merely an extention of what a person looks like. 
I do tend  to gravitate more to males than females.  I think that is a reciprocity thing.  I relate more to what guys do.  But male and female psychology is a whole other that I would be happy to discuss with anyone... just not right now.
So, want me to love your body?  Be kind and good.  Let me see everything that makes you gorgeous, including your flaws (yes, flaws are beautiful too).  But show me your ass, and its all I will ever see!

3/21/2007 9:55:24 PM
Anyone who says that sunshine is the only thing that brings happiness, never danced in the rain.

3/16/2007 10:09:33 PM
Alright, it seems that I have run into at least one descent Dom.  We dated for a while and kind of tested the waters.  He was a good man. 
Now I have recieved criticism from folks saying that I just don't take break-ups well.  And for the most part, I don't see how any break-up could be all peaches and cream.  But I will say this, this time, I knew it was coming.  He did somethig rarely done on-line, and talked to me about issues, multiple times.  I won't go into all of the he said, she said crap.  He was a good man who treated me well. And as much as we both wanted it, it just wasn't possible right now. 
I learned a lot about me when I was with him, some from him and some that i figured out on my own.   His family ,  (both 2 and 4 legged) were great to me.  I am going to miss all of it.  But I am greatful, because the very last lesson I learned was that I can lose a friend or a Dom and still be okay (crying about it, but okay). 

1/15/2007 9:49:53 PM
ATTENTION ALL DOMS AND WANNABES:
I have recieved a great deal of mail regarding my supposed negativity towards those calling themselves Dominates.  Please stop whinning!
Look folks, I am a reasonable girl.  Throughout my journey in this lifestyle, I have been seeking a HUMAN, Master.  I expect my Dom to screw up.  In fact, I find many so-called flaws indearing.  But the fact of the matter is that with the power comes responsiblity.  And while I know that this is a double standerd, there are just some mistakes that Doms are not allowed to make.  Dropping a slave in the middle of her hardest limit, and then shrugging and say "Oops" is one of them. 
Come on people.  You can't train a slave to depend on, need and love you, and then get mad because they aren't alright when you pull the rug out from under them.  Step up or step away!
Those of you who have been here a while may have noticed that my designation has turned from slave to switch.  Yes I am a natural born slave, but through all the damage that has been done to me, I am willing to step up to the responsiblity.  If you aren't, then I have no need for anything you have to say.

12/18/2006 7:47:27 AM

i am seriously starting to doubt my place in this lifestyle.  all i can seem to find are Dominants who build up my trust and love, then drop me.  They tell me that everything is ok and i am safe in one breath and are gone in the next.  all i want is to serve and be wanted.  why is it so hard to find that?


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MelbMelissa
 
 Age: 31
 Springfield, Massachusetts