angelhermoso on Collarspace

7/26/2014 8:07:28 PM

As of today the new journey begins. In two weeks or about I will officially be Master's live in slave. This new journey is both exciting and terrifying. It's exiting because we have been working toward this for three years now and now it's finally here. I finally get to live with my Master and sissa. We finally get to live together as a family under the same roof. I have look forward to this day for so long. Now if I need my Master all I have to do is call for him. If I need that kiss, hug, or the simple I love you I get the real thing not a text. If I need that reassurance that everything is going to be ok I now have it at arms length in person not through a phone. Yes the phone is nice and works but nothing beats the real thing. I no longer have to feel alone all the time because when I do feel that way I have my Master and my sissa near by to make it go away. This is a good journey to be starting. I have been Master's slave for a little over three years at this point. Master has been my rock from the word go. I said then and still today that he saved me when he found me. Well here it is three years later and he still saves me. This journey is also terrifying. I have never lived anywhere else expect with my mom ( I know I'm 30 years old and should have moved out a long time ago). I'm venturing into new water and worried about drowning. I'm leaving my home of 30 years and moving to my new home. I'm leaving my safe place. My moms has always been my security and my safe place. It's always where I return to when I need to feel comforted and secure. Now that being said my mom isn't the one who has built that safe place and that security. I have built it there since I was seven years old. I had to learn at a very young age how to make my self feel safe, secure, and comforted. Which causes problems now but that not here nor there at the moment. Now I have to start all over and build that at my new home with my Master and sissa. The only difference it is I don't have to completely do it alone this time which scares the hell out of me. I'm worried about all of us adjusting to living together. Master and sissa have lived together for going on nine years. So they already have their own ways of doing stuff, they have their own routine and now I'm thrown in into the mix. I'm trying to be very careful not to cross any lines or get in the middle of their routine and how they do things because I don't want to be in the way or cause any un-needed stresses. I know it's going to take a lot for us to get acclimated to living together and I know there is going to be trying times until we all adjusted. I just have to find my place, figure how and where I fit into their life and routine just like they have to as well. I have to figure out where I belong in this new journey and that's just something I have to do on my own. Things just have to fall into place on their own and hopefully the road won't be to hilly and rocky. I think I just worry about things to much sometime. New adventures and new journeys always bring about change and I don't typically deal well with change very well because change hasn't always been good or pleasant experiences for me at least not the major ones and for me this is a major change so I'm afraid of it but facing it. To new adventures and journeys!