MasterWilliam55

Male Dominant, 23, Altamonte Springs, Florida

Male Dominant, 54, Florida Panhandle, Florida

Male Dominant, 41

The longer I'm into this lifestyle, the more I have come to appreciate the role that protocols, rituals and behaviour modification play in M/s relationships. Not only do they demonstate, and reinforce the roles that each person lives by, I have come to understand something else; a dynamic called "belonging". Some argue that submission is a slave's gift to her Master. I would agree with that and add what the  Master/Mistress gives in return is just as important, a sense of belonging. This is probably the most important gift a Master can convey on his slave, a place where she can belong, nuture her/his needs, grow, feel emotionally secure. In other words, someone she can be totally open with and express and act on her desires. I used to find it tedious and somewhat rediculous to be asked by a slave (when I was not with her), what my "orders" were for her, for the night, day, week, whatever. But it was her way of keeping the dynamic of "belonging" alive and well. It was a way of watering (nurturing) the M/s relationship. She new she had my attention. The same can be said for play activities. Even sadists and masochists have that need to belong to someone. It's true, you can play casually for the "rush" the endorphine high. But, when you witness or experience hard play between two souls that belong to each other in an M/s relationship, the play is electric. Every strike, every touch, conveys the message that she belong to him and he to her. And if during aftercare, you let your slave release his/her inner child into your calm embrase, you will have completed a scene that will create deep emotional bonds that  change you forever. Where is all this leading. Recently I completed teaching an experienced slave who through much of her life has lived day-to-day and never experienced a real relationship. I simply taught her that she had value and was cherished and respected for what she was and as a result had a bright future in this lifestyle to look forward to. This had nothing to do with any play, or sex or D/s we might have engaged in. I was formost her friend and trusted Sir. That was my job, that was why she came to me, to help her experience and accept all those things that make a good relationship healthy and fun. Eventually another Master came into the picture, who could give her the final piece to her puzzle. A chance at a 24/7 M/s relationship, something I couldn't do. I helped them come together and provided a bit of guidance. We now come together as friends . I also learned from both of them. I came to better understand that not only is the slaves behaviour important...but the behaviour of the Master in a relationship is critical. It's the little things we do with protocols and rituals and how we interact during play that modifies our behaviour for the better. The Master provides stability (that's what control is all about). He provides guidance and allows his charge to freely express herself. He helps her grow. She in return, offers up that gift of submission. It's while refecting on this unusual situation I came to understand the dynamic of "belonging" and try to put words to this complex emotion, and how the pieces of the puzzle fit together. Someone smarter than me will explain the psychology behind all this. Enough for now.

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