Currently we are seeking to add a submissive female or a slave to our household. We arent interested in one-night stands, or adding a male to our arrangement. This person would also, ideally, be looking to be romantically involved.
We should all click, so expect to meet us at least a few times before we all determine if this is something we would like to pursue on a more serious level. Eventually we would like to progress to a live-in arrangement, so being willing to relocate is a plus. We also have pets, so if you have severe allergies to them, it probably wont work out. We also generally read and respond to messages together, as time permits. In short, we are looking for is someone we both have chemistry with. Without that, the other qualities dont really matter do they?
As as the lifestyle goes, we have what I would consider a reasonable number of years under our respective belts. We are involved with the local community when we can be, which is far too little for our own tastes as a result of our schedules. However, more recently, we both seem to have availability on weekends.
Beyond kink, we have varied interests.
My interests include gaming, writing, cooking, podcasts (listening mostly, and very occasionally being in one), science, economics, and the net. I also enjoy building things when I have the opportunity, which isnt often enough. In anything I tend to rely heavily on wild, unpredictable flashes of intuition, they usually work out.
My wife has a similar love of cooking, and to be perfectly honest outclasses me in technical skill at it by a mile. Shes a switch by nature, and submissive to me. With other females her behavior tends towards dominant. She enjoys hiking, and other physical activities, as well as reading.
If youve read this long, youre either pretty bored, looking for ination to reference while introducing yourself, or interested in what I have to say. Possibly all 3. In any case, you should introduce yourself.
Fun times abound but I am pretty certain my celebration of this particular season (being st. patricks day and all, they run the parade early here, and I figure what the hell, I'll celebrate it early too) was a tad over exuberant. I STILL feel worn out from it. I shall spare you all the sultry details, but will say I successfully broke the spirit of my liver.
It's also been brought to my attention my profile sounds far too serious. Might be time for a rewrite. But I'm really just not in the mood to do so at the moment.
Bah! just realized my age doesn't auto update, fixed!
Quickish update!
Busy busy busy! This is life. Lots of new contacts, some promising developments in career, etc. Life is exhausting, but not bad at all.
It has been a ...rough.. month.
Difficulty at work + illness +quitting smoking (close to a month now) + death of a loved one + tax time= I'm not the most pleasant nor sane of people recently.
Not making it any easier was the quite annoying habit I have of being the person people talk to right before they pass. Really. I'm like the family reaper. I can not see them for 6 months while they're dying. Go visit and 15 minutes to a day and a half later someone croaks. Seriously.? I'm well aware intellectually this has absolutely nothing to do with me. Various people in the family have mentioned it more to my credit, like someone was holding on to see me, but really it is still pretty annoying and disconcerting. To quote myself to a co-worker "This people dying shit is starting to get real old"
It has been an interesting test of endurance though. Pretty sure I'm sick again though, ugh. Probably has something to do with the whole less than 3 hours of sleep a night combined with drastic tampering with my neurochemicals as a result of smoking cessation.
Also apparently I have more of this throat feels like I have been punched by the juggernaut business to look forward to as a primary result of all the crap that was previously in my lungs leaving. I take this as empirical evidence that my body hates me.
I have however noticed my breathing has gotten deeper than it has been previously however. Whether this is all placebo or not is up to debate.
Yes, I'm well aware that I've intellectualized everything down to the physical effects of the hate my body is currently visiting upon me. Don't knock it til you've tried it ;)
Ughhhhh. I suppose taunting illness with "Ha! I never get sick" whenever I'm covering 40 shifts because everyone has the plague eventually catches up to you. The worst part right now though is the headache. The stuffiness I can deal with, fever? Bring it on. But feeling like someone punched me directly in the frontal lobe after gluing awls and broken glass to their knuckles is just not my cup of tea.
Though placing pain meds into a pez dispenser that says I <3 U on the front, is possibly the greatest idea in the history of mankind. Either that, or I've had far too much cough syrup. Possibly both.
Another day, another dime. Time is moving quite a bit more quickly than I would prefer it to. Damned inconsiderate of it. I spent the last month mostly involved in various introspective pursuits, popping up to assure friends and family that rumors of my death were in fact greatly exaggerated.
I feel perhaps that I have remained solitary a bit more than I should, but such things cannot be helped. I'm wont to do what I will after all.
One may of course be wondering as to the tone of this particular entry, the writing style seems off even to me. Happens, reading a book in a particular tone right now, and I'm certain my writing shall shortly fall into the old familiar patterns, but not today.
This particular post did indeed have somewhat of a topic however. They all do, at least originally, though one wonders at the cryptic methods I expect people reading to employ towards deciphering it. At least I hope it is entertaining.
But I digress. Recently my thoughts have taken a turn towards that old tried and true area of consternation for all mankind for as long as there has been thought. Relationships. Yes, I hate that word as well. Sounds a bit too....trite. But in any case, the concept remains the same.
Too many I think, are too quick to heavily invest themselves. They start out, and things are fine. Good even. So they expect more, even if such is not stated or even consciously acknowledged, and when those expectations begin to outpace reality, problems arise.
What then I ask is the rush? Seriously. Is the sense of our impending deaths many decades from now hanging over our heads even in our youth? Are we that aware of our own mortality that we must hurry around like busy little bees, never stopping to bask in the here and now?
I think perhaps I have not always been innocent of that either. I of course do not make mistakes now :P (Perish the thought!). If your sarcasm detector has not yet gone off, I suggest you get it serviced.
In my younger days (I really hate saying that, I'm not old, but I like it better than saying years ago, flows better) looking back I've certainly been guilty of that urgency. Maybe it's just the biological drive to find a mate. A parallel mechanism of the sex drive, somewhat of a companionship drive. It would not be completely unthinkable for one to exist in social animals after all, but whatever it is, I find it has calmed as I've aged.
Perhaps it is just learning from one's mistakes. Too many however find something acceptable, and just deal with it, rather than finding what (and who) they truly want. The other portion of people tend to miss out on what they want, because they don't actually know what it is, and take off before they even realize it. That slice in the middle just manages to figure it out, or gets lucky.
I guess what I would be attempting to say in a long-winded fashion would be to know exactly what you want. Compromise on circumstances, but never on that. By the same token realize that everything in life takes time, and circumstances are always temporary. Learn from mistakes, both those you've done, and vicariously.
Oh, and above all else. Life follows a bell curve. Defy it.
Back and looking again. What will I find? Time will indeed tell.
Oh and happy new years to everyone! Been an interesting year here. Made literal tons of money, alot of new friends, new adventures, new plans, more on that later.
My new place is quickly becoming old. Feels like home though. Kind of a new sensation for me.
Doing well this year, still busy as ever, running around, and work, work, work.
Loving one of my jobs at least. The other is well, just a job. I do love interacting with patients though, which is probably why I've kept my part time job for so long, despite it being somewhat of a hassle schedule-wise, and it paying less than the other.
I'm single again as well, though that comes with it's usual degree of consternation. Sometimes things...just don't work out. Back to the drawing board so to speak.
Short notes.
New place=Absolutely fabulous.
Work= lots
Sleep= opposite of lots
Moving in progress. Got my keys. Will attempt to get to mails tomorrow morning. Totally exhausted at the moment however. Sleep time!
Hot damm! Found a place, and boy is it a place. Big nice victorian looking house, very very very nice. I'd consider it upscale. Got it for a song and a dance. Go me!
P.S. I'm awesome
P.P.S. I also may fight robots in my spare time.
P.P.P.S. With the statement above the mileage of truth may vary.
Quick update, strep throat D: . Literal tons of work this week! Seeing possible new place tomorrow (hopefully a much nicer one, sounds it so far). Need sleep, and antibiotics, in reverse order actually.
Hopefully this situation all settles down by mid next week at the latest ugh.
Well looks like moving has been added to my list of nasty little surprises for the month. I had hoped to put this whole ordeal off a while longer, that way I'd be moving into a home I own, rather than another apartment. Unfortunately, that will not be the case. The landlord, while he was planning on selling the place, originally had a buyer interested as a rental property, that fell through, and now it's looking like the gas will be turned off (thankfully it's summer). What this means for me is actually very little (due to the season, and my already fairly intense work schedule). Essentially my showers will be cold here, and I'll have to rely on finely dorm tuned microwave cooking skills for the remainder of my time while looking for another place.
It is incredibly frustrating though. Finding another place close to both of my jobs is a necessity, and already looking around this morning I'll be paying a bit more. He did however give me as long as I need rent free to stay here, keep my stuff here, etc. So it's not all bad and frantic. Though I wish I had known about this during my week off, rather than everyone else's where I'll have to cover shifts an extensive amount.
The extremely irritating part is I'll probably end up locked in another lease for a year, while I wanted to buy a place this year. I can always buy a place and rent it out until I can leave, but it's still annoying. However I highly doubt this place will remain viable for long enough to push a deal on a home through. So the tax credit for buying a place this year is probably not in the cards. Though perhaps there will be one offered next year as well. Who knows.
Never seems to hit me until I'm dry of it for a few days, though this seems like a migraine on top of it. Though I suppose not taking care of it when it first started to pound behind my eyes and instead going, hrmm I could use a nice hot bath...probably a mistake. But eh, live learn, or not considering I should have known that would happen.
On the up side, last night I did feast on a sumptuous bounty of buffalo, raspberries, and gravy fries. So my stomach is well pleased! All hail Lord Appetite!
In any case, I'm getting to writing and mails and such, though my brain is currently limping along, and being fairly uncooperative, demanding the return of it's favorite drugs (coffee and cigarettes of course).
Well well well. Time again for one of these (yes I'm attempting regular updates, we'll see how that goes).
Finally swapped my schedule back to a daytime one. About damn time too. Can only keep a mostly nocturnal schedule going for so long without getting exhausted. Though that has more to do with most of the people I know being awake primarily during the daytime. As well as most places I'd like to frequent being open then as well. Technically I cheated in swapping my schedule, I do have the week off. When I work it's far more difficult to do so.
That of course isn't to say I've had the week idle. There is much still to get done. Bills, some organizational work, some writing, laundry, and some interior work to get done. Also apparently sleep to catch up on, as my body has not been shy of reminding me. My computer expertise has also been called upon a few times, unfortunately for a Mac, one of my least favorite types of machine to work on. I liken it to pulling teeth, with a horse, a rope, and a thimbleful of whiskey. Arduous, time consuming, and the rest of the time spent wondering why the fuck it's not set up in a sensible way that should follow normal human patterns of thought. No of course not, instead everything takes several hours. If it wasn't for a good friend, I would have laughed and said uh, guess you're fucked.
For a quick explanation of what I've been doing. Itunes: UNAUTHORIZED PLEASE LOAD ME Me: No, fuck you, do what I want. Itunes: Unauthorized? Me: No. Itunes: But... Me: Are you really going to make me force you? Itunes: .... Me: Okay then *several hours later* now do what I want Itunes: Yes sir. Me: That's more like it. Wait...why are all these songs that aren't here still here? Why can I not sort these! ARGH! Fucking hell.
Though this week has been a veritable cornucopia of good news as well. The past few weeks really. Cancer was a nil. Nothing to worry about on that front, extremely good news at work as well, though I won't delve into why. Even got free movie tickets the other day. Think I might take some family out, been a while, and they deserve a little bit of a respite, as well as a payback for some assistance a while back. But after writing, and some cooking of course. I'm thinking steaks. Much steaks.
Back again. Finally got to my mail. And a journal entry! Really packing away the backwork today.
It is with a certain amount of restlessness that I find myself single. Of course much of the restlessness is probably due to the prolonged effort not to smoke. Yep that's right. Quitting. Characteristically I refuse to take advantage of any of the quit smoking products on the market. My normal views on medication are varying and fairly complex, but in this case it boils down very simply. I made a choice to smoke. Thus since I freely made said choice. I also accepted at that time, any suffering involved in quitting. Making it any easier on myself seems a refutation of my will to do it on my own. That seems unacceptable to me, though I am stubborn as hell, so maybe that has something to do with it.
In other news, I've been considering buying a home for quite some time. The market at the moment makes it fairly attractive, and my job stability assuages my concerns about future foreclosures, etc. That and the 15 grand or so the county and federal government will just hand me doesn't hurt either. It's feeling more and more like a viable option, I'm convinced that's a good thing.
A new grocery opened up about a block away from me as well, and I've been super excited about it, as many that know me by now may have guessed. While the place is kind of...hrmm...bodega-ish? It still carries some unusual merchandise, and it carries ginger beer, which I've discovered a great fondness of. The produce certainly leaves something to be desired, though the meats seem fine, not amazing, but fine, and completely acceptable. Definitely like having easily accesible fresh food every day, rather than having to store things.
My mood as of late hasn't been helped much by the looming specter of a possible cancer diagnosis. No, I don't know yet. Yes I'm fairly certain it wasn't. I find out next week. Who knows though. No, it isn't what prompted the quitting smoking either.
In any case, my week is unfortunately full to the brim of stuff to do. This is quite unfortunate, but can't be helped. I take some comfort that due to the large amount of coworker vacations I'll be making a ludicrous amount of money in the next few weeks. WOO!
With that it's off to fight nazi's by learning how to airsurf on crocodiles!
(and if you get that reference, congratulations, you're awesome.)
Mail later in the day, definitely need some relaxation happy time, after the flurry of activity from last night and this morning. Did a large portion of my xmas shopping, and ended up making breakfast for seven this morning + myself. Compliments all around on the quality and fluffiness of my eggs, and being as I bask in cooking compliments like an iguana in the sun, I couldn't be happier at the moment :D
So a very long story short, since I currently require sleep of heroic proportions.
Sister=> Baby, lil girl, name: Kaelie (Firefly fans REJOICE!). Weird thing, she didn't know she was pregnant, had her period the entire time etc, apparently it's rare, but happens. Found out the day the child was born. Mom called at work and said hey, are you sitting down. Several choruses of WHAT THE FUCK? later, the situation was explained.
Job=> Raises! Go me. Love love love love all your money!
Social=> Friends and I currently completely dominating a game we play online. Wintastic.
Health=> Much better, pain pretty much gone, all healed up and such. Though right now I ache like hell everywhere due to being up way longer than human beings were made to be. I intend to remedy that. Nowish.
Back! Promise I'll get to mail this time. Lots of happenings, all things big and small, and all that jazz. Also, abracadabra. Yes, I said it.
But those things will wait a bit. Now it is time to indulge in some mealtime festivities (<3 my job)
So tired, yes I popped in. Getting to mails. But first getting to sleep. Looooonnngggg weekend.
Nothing ventured, nothing gained. An amazing deal on a new house got shot down this week. They're basically not going to sell anytime soon. Though I was told I'll be the first person they call if they do.
This week also ends up getting even more hectic with a friend and coworkers family having a severe medical crisis, which for me means I have to work a millionty hours in the next few days! WOO! Oh....wait...that's the opposite of woo. In fact, it's the exact reverse of woo. Very oow.
However things aren't all headed towards unsatisfactoryville. A new prospect in regards to housing just cropped up. Bit more expensive, not nearly as fantastic of a deal, but through an actual realtor, so we'll see how that goes. It's also much closer than the previous prospect, few blocks further than I'd have to go currently, so not too bad at all. I'd also be relatively close to where my grandmother lives, so I'd be able to stop over and check on her more often than I do. Also it's a double block, and zoned as such, so I'd be able to rent the other half, and come out a slight bit ahead with the increased utility cost. GO ME!
In any case, fingers crossed as I wade into the 90+ hour gladitorial combat that will be my week.
This just in. Shock coffee....is made of win and love. Once (and by once I mean several hours ago) I was kind of miffed at getting asked to cover part of a shift. As I was sleepy. But I set out anyways! When I arrived, there it was. Sitting out for me, pot already made. Behold! the holy grail of caffeinated beverages I was told. But how? I said. What is so good about this coffee? While proceding to consume a cup.
Then I was wired :D. Now I just need to figure out which of my projects to spend all this energy on.
Addendum.....I've just realized that my message formatting has probably been quite off and weirdly spaced. I've been gauging it on the history spacing, which is not accurate apparently. In read mail the spaces show up just fine. Psh all that holding the spacebar for nothing :P
Also, looks like linking my blog would be prohibited. So yeah, if you want to read other entries I've written on a great variety of topics. Just ask.
Mail! I'm getting to it :D.
Also I'm considering putting the link to my regular blog on here, since people seem to enjoy my miscellaneous ramblings. I have to read a bit more carefully over the tos here, etc though, as I'm not sure it's particularly permitted. Possibly identifying information section and all. So until then if you want to read my other stuff, just ask. I'll be more than happy to provide you with the link.
Meh missed the party. Got stuck at work until 4am. Oh well. The overtime is useful at least.
Hmmm perchance I might end up at a party this weekend. That is of course if work does not end up intervening in some yet to be determined manner. Such is always a possibility in my life, unfortunately so. Though my bank account tend to be thoroughly pleased when that happens, the rest of me gets grumbly.
Birthday in the past few days, although I didn't recieve gifts until the next day. My family tends to be late with such things. Point of habit for all of us I suppose. Though I was pleasantly surprised how many of my friends that I've never told when it was managed to figure it out! <3 you guys.
Excellent dinner yesterday out. Amazing and fantastic. I managed to fulfill my obligation of the tables designated I'm too full disposal unit (Every table needs one!). I managed to sock away 4 sicilian style squares of red pizza, 4 white, a house salad with shaved asiago cheese, pine nuts and a light vinagerette, a few clams, a long pepper stuffed with ricotta cheese and covered with this slightly spiced red sauce, a few bites of this veal marsala thing someone was unable to finished and slid over to me, a very fantastic loaf of this bread they had (think I tasted some rosemary) buttered, and very very warm from the oven (fresh baked of course!), some mushroom caps stuffed with this very excellent sausage (somewhat spiced, not heavily, but just right), and a very good flounder stuffed with crabmeat (actual crabmeat, fake ass ghetto crabmeat need not apply) and done in this light lemon and garlic butter sauce. If that wasn't enough I tossed back a few drinks, 2 expresso martini's a heavenly little cup of coffee, and then they brought me cake! A nice little piece of raspberry and butter cream icing with shaved bits of white chocolate. I managed to stuff all of it down and leave with a big smile on my face, albeit feeling very very sluggish. All in all, a good birthday dinner. It occurs to me that with my eating habit I should be a very large guy. However my metabolism appears to be a retrofitted nuclear reactor type. Yes, many of my friends hate me for that.
But it's that time again, days off spent time to return to work.
Okay, that should take care of messages for now! If you've mailed me and not gotten a response, you should probably resend! :D
? Weekend doubleshifts coming up! Oh joy.
Woo! Almost healed up from my little catastrophe from hell. Things seem to be slightly getting better lifewise, apart from some arbitrary hurdles.
So tired lately, was weaning myself off of caffeine for a bit. I generally tend to do so every few months before it gets faaar out of hand. However today I figured enough and decided to have a bottle of soda! WOO! This makes a happy brain.
If you've said hi, or emailed me, trust me, I'm working on getting back to you. I always try to respond. Things have just been pretty crazily busy lately, mostly with work but especially with family matters,? as they have a tendency to do. I'll be sending out mail etc later tonight.
For various friends of mine, if you've sent anything to my regular email, it's been screwing up again. Best to im me or toss a note here if you have, until I get that whole thing figured out. It would be a shame to have to change my mail provider, but with the amount of spam I've been getting along with this issue it may be time.
In any case, I'll do that later, a hefty bounty of delicious pasta awaits me in the kitchen!
Pain goooooonee! Happy pink pills! Eating again! Yay! More surgery probably in the future! BOOOO!
The ordeal seems over. But will it be for long? Who knows. I certainly hope so. Though I cannot smoke for a few days now. This makes me irritable, very irritable. I suspect the next few days will be interesting, as I have 2 double shifts stacked up, though I only have to deal with someone I'm not fond of for the next maybe 6 hours or so. Otherwise it's all people I like, so I think things will be fine today.
In any case I need to head off to work and grab some food. I've eaten like, a bowl of soup in two days. This needs to change.
So after a day filled with severe pain (not the good kind), I find out I have to wait until 10am tommorrow to stop this vile traitor of a tooth from further injuring me with it's apparently extreme malice for all things living. Fortunately it seems to have calmed down somewhat with the cocktail of pain meds I've subjected it to in the past hour. Namely darvon, ibuprofen, and a good bit of benzocaine. Still hurts quite a bit though, but at least it's not the pace back and forth cursing the heavens pain it was when I woke up after the dentist's. Good thing I have some sick day's saved up. I'll probably be MIA for a bit.
Holy updates BATMAN! All is fine in the land of me at the moment. Well not exactly fine, there is a gods awful pain in my lower right molar that manifested itself this week. It's times like this I'm glad I tend not to use painkillers when they're given to me, this frees them up for important times like this. I <3 you large pink pill of blissful lack of ouch. A fierce battle with nature in the past week as well, due my current neighbors being scumbag assholes.
But the past week hasn't been without it's good points. I went to a rather awesome and fantastic library sale and picked up somewhere in the neighborhood of 40 new books. When one goes through the amount of books I typically do, library sales quickly become your new god. Rather than spending close to 300$ on books, I walked away dropping 2 twenties. I also managed to get a raise! Go me!
Since I've not updated in quite a while, the new pc is going very very well. I didn't build this one surprisingly enough. While there is some amount of craftsmans remorse in that, this was far too excellent of a deal to pass up (I got a new desktop as well as a laptop). 700$ for something where the components alone would run me around that? Sign me up!
New laptop!
Well that was entertaining. Will be mia for a few days as my pc has unfortunately met it's demise due to old age. I realized this when failing to power on without errors, smoke poured out of the motherboard. It was actually fairly entertaining. It was a good old homebrew system...it shall be missed.
Phew another hell weekend behind me, running mostly on caffeine. I believe in the past few days I've ingested enough of that particular chemical to kill a small village. Something to be said for building up a tolerance I suppose. Although the parts of my brain that regulate my sleep are ostensibly quite upset with me.
I think this morning it is high time for me to relax a bit. After some housecleaning and bills of course. Maybe grab some lunch at a downtown cafe. Though I did finally get to watch Maybe logic. Basically a documentary of one of my favorite authors, and indeed people, though he is now among the deceased, Robert Anton Wilson. Gotta love good old Bob after all.
Finished running the gauntlet this past weekend (4 double shifts 1 single shift before the gauntlet started) and heading into another grueling weekend of doing mostly that again. Things get somewhat annoying around the holidays when one has two jobs. Not that I mind the money. All accounts settled thanksgiving weekend was profitable, bringing in a bit over a grand. The annoying part is more the plethora of people calling off at random moments, with half the rest of the staff pulling vacation days. Some people I swear have no concept of time. Just working for 16 hours, trying to get some sleep before I go and do it again...and people are calling begging me to pick up shifts during my sleep time. Then again the favors people owe me pile increases exponentially during those times too. So in the end I suppose it's worth it.
It is progression though. Slow but steady, putting away money for retirement while I pay my student loans off to an acceptable level, and padding my resume. That way I can rest semi-easily when I return to graduate school in a year or two. All things considered after this upcoming year I should have about a 4 year head start on my goal as far as long term plans go. Though honestly I can't wait until I'm back in the "swing" of school so to speak. Administering psychometric tests, writing client reports, studying my ass off, sure it's a grind. But I find myself missing it.
But enough waxing philosophical. I'm also incredibly excited about several projects I have in the works. Finding a shop that does custom machining is a must for the moment though, as I find myself relatively unwilling to spend a large amount of money acquiring a metal lathe for what would amount to a few projects. Right now I'm relegating myself to getting back into the swing of soldering electrical components. It's been a while, and the lack of practice is definitely showing.
insert kickass first entry here!
See, bask in it's glory! Bask I say!
Now that the silly is done with. I do terribly wish there were more of a "scene" around here than there is. Doesn't seem like theres much to speak of at all back in this area. While that doesn't terribly suprise me, as it's quite a closed sort of community around here. Kind of all the snobbery without the large amounts of cash being tossed about.
That being said I do love the area, despite all it's faults. The major draw of it being the food. Having bounced around the country as much as I have in the past I've been hard pressed to find a place that even remotely compares. Every variety one can think of. Everywhere. So many restaurants just on the walk to work. One can pretty much find almost anything to eat their heart desires in this valley.? Having grown up in that kind of environment it was especially difficult for me to deal with that of florida or kentucky, where our only grocery store of note was a wal-mart (uuuugggh, too varietyless).
Another thing too that slowly tugs my heartstrings about the place is just the environment itself. We have seasons, so florida was a big switch on that point.? Another thing I noticed when the lack of them became apparent was mountains. It's slightly disturbing to look out on the horizon and be able to see for miles. Then of course finally one comes to the foliage. Trees absolutely everywhere. Absolutely gorgeous in the fall. Which is now of course.
But enough of random musing for now. Time to cook myself a rather fine meal tonight. Some catfish fillets I just acquired today, that are tastebud blastingly fresh that I have to prepare.
Until the next time I'm feeling introspective, chatty and bored.
