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The Largest BDSM Community on the Planet

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Hetero Female Switch, 46,   fl panhandle , Florida
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witchyintx -  fl panhandle , Florida

witchyintx - photo 1
witchyintx - photo 2

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Friends:
CullenAlcarzNiceBadBoycarl32536swcolomasterHairoftheDog
LordTraumalilangel73ipodjunkyBdsmMagusdrjeckel
FLDom44Daddyomg63redneckromeo68pensacolasub

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1/4/18 well i havent been here for some time.. just updating pictures and checking out who is new

12/10/13 WOOHOOO I graduate with my first degree in computer info tech in 5 days. I am halfway through my second degree in Cyber Forensics.

7/1/13
1st I am divorced now... 2nd I am a grand ma...3rd I should have my degree in December but I am thinking on getting into a secondary program in computers...
8/12/12
someone asked me to describe myself on a vanilla site and thought it would be a great add for here too below is my response to the question

Well I am 40 soon to be 41 i have 3 dogs a 23 year old son getting married next year I am a full time student I have one more year till i get my computer degree.. I decided to get my degree to back up what i already know to make it easier to find work in the economy. I do not smoke i drink once in awhile I have people i consider friends all over the world and i have friends in all lifestyles and economic status. personally i am extremely honest upfront and no bullshit type of person. i tend to get withdrawal around groups of people unless it is in a party type environment. I am hard to handle but if you are one of the few special people in my life i will do anything for you. I guess that sums me up in a nut shell.

9/26/11 Ok hi newest update and the rest is staying so everyone can see how i have changed in the past few years. I am in school full time that is my number one priority ( spelling?) in my life at this time and for the next 2 years. I need to be clear on this cause I am tired of so called Doms throwing temper tantrums like a child cause yea my life does not revolve around them. Now with that being said any Dom the whines and crys like a two year old about not getting all the attention, you may need to rethink what you are. You sound like a Sub/Slave in denial, pay attention to me, look at me, treat me like i am a 2 year old and can't wipe my own ass WTF. Sorry that is a pet peeve of mine. I am a grown woman I like being a Sub but i am far from an idiot, helpless or emotionally damaged I will not jump into something just to be with someone. I am very submissive sexually not so much any other way. So if you want someone that is gonna drop to her knees when you first meet her guess what not me. Respect is earned not a right so when I get to know someone and I come to respect them then you will recieve it and demanding it sure as hell not gonna get it from me.
8/4/09 Update So there is no more confusion I am legally separated since 2003... he lives in a totally different state I am not divorced only cause I have not bothered but the divorce proceedings have now been started ( i think waiting on papers) If this is a issue keep going.


I am a caterpillar that needs a dom to become the beautiful butterfly.

Does anyone read the profiles anyways? I am sorry I will not "do as I am told" cause you say you are a Dom... I have to trust you and want to be your submissive. Also Submissive does not mean Slave learn the difference if you do not know the difference you must not be a True Dom ( and yes i know the difference see journal entries for more info). With that being said do not contact me if you do not know or respect the difference. I do not smoke ( yes i use to quit 6 months ago)I rarely drink. Not looking for someone that wants me on my knees all the time. I am a strong willed girl and that will not change. Yes I have issues being submissive to a man that does not have his life together. If your life is not together how can you handle me and mine? I want it all the vanilla love and romance with the security of the strength of a Dom to guide me. I do not like PAIN at all I am NOT a pain slut. I expected to be respected and not abused. If you can not handle a Submissive woman that is not a doormat then drive thru. I will not blindly obey if i have a question or concern I voice it and I expect a reasonable response addressing my concerns. With all that being said hopefully it will stop some of the idiots from contacting me.






Hello i think i need to update this since it has been a year and i have a better idea of who and what i am looking for.

I decided i want it all... I want the vanilla i want the kink... I want my best friend, lover, and Dom... may not be in that order. I also will not settle for less.

1St i am not looking for a sub male switch maybe but i prefer to be submissive i just tend to be less then one outside the bedroom.

2nd I am not going to cyber with you sex and kink is the easy part but if you can't get in my head you failed from the beginning and there is not point going further end of conversation. I am sure i will revamp this more later and try to get my mismatched thoughts in one color and cohesive flow.

Username:

Description:

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Weight:

Age:

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Ethnicity:

Joined:

 witchyintx

 Female Switch

  fl panhandle  

 Florida

 5' 9"

 230 lbs

 46

 Hetero

 Caucasian

 04/17/09

 

Actively Seeking:

Dominant Male

Submissive Male

Switch Men

Friends Only

Roommates

A Poly Household

 Lives For:

 Renaissance Faires

 Travel

 MMORPGs (Expert)

 Country Music

 Loves:

 Amusement Parks

 Fishing

 Camping

 Dancing

 Scuba Diving

 Snorkeling

 Corsets

 Massage (Getting)

 Pantyhose Fetish

 Stockings

 Online RPGs

 Romance Novels

 Science Fiction

 Alternative Medicine (Beginner)

 Astrology (Beginner)

 Body Art

 Herbalism (Beginner)

 Karaoke

 Tattoos

 Intellectual Discourse

 Occultism

 Paranormal

 Eighties Music

 New Age Music

 Wicca

 Football

 Volleyball

 Likes:

 Antique Shows

 Art Galleries

 Beachcombing

 Clubbing

 Coffee Shops

 Fine Dining

 Flea Markets

 Movies

 Museums

 Musical Theater

 Shopping

 Hiking

 Hunting

 Walking

 Yoga

 Bondage (Beginner)

 Collars (Beginner)

 Exhibitionism (Beginner)

 Fire Play (Beginner)

 Foot Worship (Beginner)

 Hair Pulling (Beginner)

 Leashes

 Massage (Giving) (Beginner)

 Public Play

 Role Playing (Beginner)

 Shibari  (Beginner)

 Spanking (Beginner)

 Tickling

 Uniforms (Beginner)

 Vibrators

 Board Games

 Card Games (Beginner)

 Historical Shows

 Horror Movies

 Online Chatrooms

 Role Playing Games (Beginner)

 Aromatherapy (Beginner)

 Cooking

 Gardening

 Meditation (Beginner)

 Photography

 Singing

 Archaeology

 Astronomy

 Biology

 Philosophy

 Poetry

 Psychology (Beginner)

 Gorean Lifestyle (Beginner)

 Swinging (Beginner)

 Victorianism

 Folk Music

 Hip Hop Music

 New Wave

 Oldies

 Pop Music

 Rock Music

 Show Tunes

 Buddhism

 Christianity

 Druidism

 Neo-Paganism

 Taoism

 Auto Racing

 Bowling

 Ice Hockey

 Swimming (Beginner)

 Tennis

 Tolerates:

 Bar Hopping

 Garage Sales

 Anal Play (Beginner)

 Classical Music

 Heavy Metal Music

 Curious About:

 Raves

 Climbing

 Gymnastics

 Pilates

 Surf Boarding

 Blindfolds

 Breast Play

 Corner Time

 Fisting

 Hypnosis (Beginner)

 Masks (Wearing)

 Mental Bondage

 Obedience Training

 Objectification

 Outdoor Bondage

 Sensory Deprivation

 1950s Lifestyle

 Lifestyle BDSM

 Polyamory

 Dislikes:

 Horseback Riding

 Canes and Crops

 Hates:

 Gambling

 Running

 Housework Service

 Humiliation

 Needle Play

 Cybering

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Journal Entries:
5/28/2013 10:36:46 PM

I am officially a grandma now.. my beautiful grand daughter was born today.. 


5/17/2013 2:08:42 AM

5/17/13

 

Ok i am bored can't sleep and been trolling profiles and sending messages.. HIIII this is me bored at 4 am when I can't sleep.  

 

Any ways new semester starts later today .. hey class is in 12 hrs wooohooo.

 

Besides that waiting for my stubborn ass grand daughter to arrive.  If she is not born by the 28th she will be evicted!! I know my daughter in law can't wait the poor thing.

 

Still looking around seeing what is here.. still the same shit different day.  the liars the scammers ya know been floating around here can't help but see it.

 

Ok i am gonna try to sleep and give all ya all a break!

 

lots of love!!


12/28/2012 8:46:58 AM

So I have not update much lately... I start back to work Jan 7th part time and I am almost done with my first degree in computers. My son just got married yesterday and I will be a grand ma in June. Still looking for A Dom that can understand all of that and able to work with my vanilla life and incorporate it all in to our lives together.


7/31/2012 9:07:16 PM

Here is a question or I guess concern/rant... Why are most( not all) of the dom's selfish? If you browse the profiles it is pathetic I mean seriously with out your sub or slave you are nothing.  I would think more Dom's will wake up smell the coffee if the subby/slave not happy soon you will not be either.  Just saying.. But then again the 50 shades of grey will cause an influx of women to the lifestyle find one of those types of Doms and end up hurt physically, mentally or emotionally.. Anyways that is my thoughts for today...


5/5/2012 11:54:39 PM

Wow just realized it been a bit since my last post.  Just finished my second semester of college and taking a month and a half off before doing a summer semester .  Have one more year and i should have my computer degree then to work in that field when i decide if i want to go for oceanography.  Each semester i am taking 1 extra class to go toward a different degree.  Most of my credits for my AAS in computer info tech will not transfer over to a normal AS or a BA.  Still have not found anyone that I have been interested in speaking to at any length.  The good thing is that I am also not attracting the idiots as much since changing my status to switch so that plan worked. Well there has been my life in a nutshell since sept school school and more school


9/19/2011 8:56:19 PM

Well since i am being laid off from my job i have started back to school full time.. i will have more time to play and hopefully meet new people.  Just so any Dom interested in talking school first you second sorry but i learned not to depend on a man to support me so i need to better myself.  I hit the big 40 2 days ago... and it passed like any other day.. so i change my age to reflect the new and older me.. lol 


7/6/2010 8:47:14 PM
hello all well it been a month and i am so tired of Dom's that can not get out of fantasy world and back into reality. I have no idea why it is so hard to find a Dom or switch that wants it all... not just kink.  there is a whole world out there that is more then kinky sex and being your little whore.. granted i like that also but i refuse to give up my vanilla likes friends and life to have it... there has to be a happy medium.  Not everyone on on here works in the industry that it can be accepted 24 7 so why blow smoke up my ass about it. well anyways that is my rant for today.

6/5/2010 7:41:42 PM
UGHHH omg what is wrong with some of the so called men out there. Notice i did not say Dom.  First email contact wtf are you sending a sexual fantasy aka erotic story to someone.  You do not know me. KINK and SEX are a BONUS in the lifestyle not the foundation. I want to know you not the kink in the beginning i am not looking for play partner or a quick piece of ass.  Leave the sexually fantasy out of the first email try getting to know the person to see if it will even get to that point.  Ok i am done ranting for now.

6/3/2010 6:04:52 PM
ok new rant for today... I read like 8 or 9 books of gor just to see what it is about. I love how many of the so call Gorean masters out there on Gor would be a laughing stock. I do not remember Gorean Masters in the book being over weight.. and unable to care for the property they own. Those "masters" did not own kajira they could not afford to own one. I mean hello only the man the could fight and protect kept a kajira also. I do not get why people think a fantasy world can be made real.. yes some of the concepts are great and i tend to like the Doms that follow some of them.  But draw the line get out of fantasy bring it to reality and what the real world is.

Thanks for listening to my rant but i am so tired of seeing so called Doms whine about it.. well look at yourself first there is a reason why a sub/ slave is not interested in you. 

5/25/2010 10:26:37 PM
Well my sister did it again so i decided to let he suffer for awhile and not move to TN at this time.  I am in Miss and playing nanny to a 10 yr old boy for the summer.  During that time i will decide what i am gonna do.

4/19/2010 10:01:22 AM
changes changes... well my little sister called me today she screwed up and will lose her driving license so i was planning on moving to Tn anyways this just sped it up.  She has 3 kids that need to be toted around to foot ball cheerleader etc and i will be the new taxi driver for a year woohoo.. ugh lol so anyone in the nashville area i will be not too far from there in about 3 weeks

4/15/2010 2:45:01 AM
Hello all...

Well I have decided I want it all and will not settle for less.  i want the vanilla  life I want the kink.  i want my best friend my lover my Dom all in one.

I am not looking for someone perfect... yes i need to be attracted to you but doesn't mean you need to be perfect.

I also need someone that can handle a smart head strong woman.  i do not need to be told what to wear how to act in public.  I do not need a control freak using the name Dom to cover his tracks... I do not need the abuser that every other word out of his mouth is calling me a whore slut worthless etc... there is a time and place for that and it is not at the dinning room table.  so many Guys out here that think they are Doms when they are not then become abusive when they are called on it. any ways that is just my 2 cents worth at this time.  if you can't give the whole package there is the door...

2/11/2010 10:33:58 PM
hello everyone...

Well i just realized something that most people on here it is all about the lifestyle... for me the lifestyle is just one part of what makes me who i am not everything about who i am.  I want the man that owns me to be the same way this does not define him but shapes who he really is.

1/1/2010 11:05:04 AM
Happy New Year!!!
And with that being said out with the old that wasn't working and in with the new... Get rid of the deadwood holding ya back and start fresh.  Hope every one's New Year is better then last year.

love and light

12/30/2009 8:17:38 PM
Hi all correct me if i am wrong please... i thought if you were Dom you were the one in control (per say)... I have been talkin to a Dom on here for months wanted me in a poly relationship... but everything had to be okayed by his girl some i could understand... but him expected me to work  to support her cause she didn't work... excuse me not happening,  Also every girl  (including me) that he has tried to bring into his house she rejected.  The worse part it he allows it... she tells him yes or no on having a second girl... when they have sex WTF???  Maybe he needs to rethink being a Dom and try Submissive or switch. Just seems like he is always making excuses why she can not perform her duties but expects me to do what he says when he says and no questions asked... ughhhh

Ok sorry for venting just annoys me

10/31/2009 7:32:59 AM
Blessed Samhian to all!!

10/27/2009 9:15:18 AM
wow got this link from another persons profile thanks Theresa  lets see how many doms on here can pass the acid test....

http://www.askdollie.com/acid_test.htm

9/17/2009 3:36:47 AM
Happy Birthday to me age just went up one...

8/29/2009 2:51:59 PM
ok ok I am on a kick again... and i knowwww i will piss off many a DOm on here.  WTF is it with telling me i must address you as Sir.  Respect has nothing to do with what i call you( well unless it makes u feel better) I could call you Sir and be thinking die asshole... does that sound like i respect you?? Respect is earned and for any and all Doms that want the woman they love to call them Sir please drive through... That should get rid of alot of the self centered assholes that use this site for the wrong reasons.  Anyways everyone else have a nice weekend.

HUGS!!!

8/16/2009 3:56:16 PM
YEA!!!! My computer if fixed i am a happy girl again i can play my games... anyways I know there were a few ppl i was talking to ... hopeflly this week i will get back to you... 

8/2/2009 3:56:19 PM
OK ok i am on a roll today... WTF is it with 90% of the doms having master dom or sir in their handle... is it so just in case when we did a search we forgot we were looking for DOMs? 

Ok here is another thing why are Doms so hooked on SIR??? ok it is a respect thing so is calling you by your name... To me SIR is a stranger some idiot annoying me... example how many times have you called customer service... what do they call men SIR why cause it is generic... and means we do not give to shits about who you are we are here to help cause we get paid no not cause we want to...

Ok another example of SIR JUNK MAIL

So if you want to be called Sir by me great means you are not worth my time to get to know so hey lets not even bother ... thank you have a nice day drive thru

8/2/2009 2:56:17 PM
thank you SirJoe1211 for this.

APPROACHING A PROSPECTIVE SUB/SLAVE
   

I am Sir Joe. I have been online for a while now, and I have had many conversations with multiple submissives. The one thing that they all have in common is the incredible exasperation and frustration they feel regarding the e-mails and IM's they get from male Dominants.

(I am directing my comments to Male not Female Dominants the rules are seemingly different for Domme's, and my comments here don't generally apply you.)

Gentlemen, this is after all a fetish life we live, BUT, if you are really the Dominant you claim to be, and a member of the lifestyle that promotes SSC (Safe, Sane, and Consensual) or RACK (Risk Aware Consensual Kink) then how is it that so many of you begin an introductory e-mail or instant message with commands you have not been given consent to make?

Hi I'm Dom (whoever) now, "On your knees bitch!" or "I want to stick my dick in your ass!" or my personal favorite "Be a good whore, and reply to me NOW!" are not the kind of phrases that any woman, sub or not will respond to. So Stop It!

I have been in this lifestyle for over 10-years, and I have met every woman I have dated since 2000 (including my last sub/wife) online. Why, because no matter who I am talking to I offer her the same respect I want for myself.

You would no more walk up to a woman at the Mall, and tell her to get on her knees, how can you assume that this will be a winning strategy online? Is it because its a fetish site? Poor assumption, if that's what you’re thinking.

This is a lifestyle based entirely on trust! Who in their right mind would trust you if your first comment was so derogatory that it was offensive. Don't get me wrong, in a scene, when consent has been given, you can talk to your sub in whatever manner turns you or her on. However, do you expect to get to a point where your having a real time encounter with a submissive, if you are so blunt and disrespectful in your initial introduction? Or even before you have established a basis for that kind of discussion, or e-mail.

Like I said, I have been online now since 1998, I have met dozens women in person, and am chatting with many others, whom I expect to meet, and there is no doubt that in their minds, or fanny's for that matter that I am Dominant. But I didn't make any overtly sexual or BDSM related comments in my initial introduction. WHY? Because when it comes to female submissives, they are not about to offer trust, or themselves to anyone who can't even respect them enough to introduce themselves in non threatening manner.
     

            RULE #1: JUST BECAUSE THEY ARE SUBMISSIVE DOESN’T MEAN THEY ARE SUBMISSIVE TO YOU!

      It doesn't matter if the sub has said, "write me, and tell me what you violent degrading things you want to do to me." why, because unless your writing a letter just to get her off, then odds are your not going to be anything more than the sender of a dirty letter. If you really want to meet her and do those things, you need to understand TRUST! It might work occasionally (1/10,000) but that is pretty poor odds. and it will be (0/1,000,000) if it is a newbie or novice sub, who is nervous to begin with.

      If you can't make a vanilla (I use the word to make my point clear) introduction of yourself to a female submissive, and establish that your not some whack job or psychopath, then don't write them at all. It is the conclusion of those of us truly in the lifestyle, that anyone who can't see the reality of trust and consent in the process is nothing more than a wannabe, who is fooling himself.

      I am personally offended by any man that has no other articulate way to introduce himself to a woman than to say, "get on your knees bitch!".

      If that is your standard introduction grow up. If your offended by what I've said, then you're exactly who I am talking about and guilty of being an asshole.

      DOM doesn't mean DICK. If you can't be Dominant, or assertive without being a dick-head, turn off your computer, jack off an go to sleep, because in the end, that is all your going to be doing anyway.

      I am Sir Joe and I am a real Leather Master, committed to this lifestyle. If you have any comments feel free to let me know. But know this, I am right.

      Ultimately, respect and trust, will be the only way you get the consent you need have a real life encounter with a sub.

      

      Written By

      Sir Joe

8/2/2009 8:30:07 AM
Well I did it again crashed my computer have to rebuild it... fried the mother board... so i will not be on much for the next week till i rebuild it just thougt i would let ppl know why i poofed.

5/30/2009 2:48:32 AM
hmmm ok.. well there is someone very special I have met from this site.  He makes me smile every time i talk with him.  He is still getting to Know me and I him but hopefully if all goes well he will be my Master, love and mate.  So at this time I am not Collared but I am interested in someone Very seriously.  I am open to talk just please respect that i hope to be collared in the near future.

5/12/2009 6:17:12 PM
The Color Code

Definitely Blue

Congratulations, Witchy, you are a BLUE personality. The Core Motivation that drives you through life is "Intimacy". It is important to note that this does not mean sexual intimacy. BLUES need connection - the sharing of rich, deep emotions that bind people together. As a BLUE, you will often sacrifice a great deal of time, effort, and/or personal convenience to develop and maintain meaningful relationships throughout your life.

BLUES seek opportunities to genuinely connect with others, and need to be understood and appreciated, especially by their partner. Everything you do as a BLUE has to be quality-based, or you won't do it at all. You are incredibly loyal to friends, employers, employees, and above all to your significant other. Whatever or whomever you commit to is your sole (and soul) focus. As a BLUE, you love to serve and will give freely of yourself in order to nurture the lives of others.

BLUES have distinct preferences and are the most controlling of the four personalities, although they may not acknowledge (or even realize) the fact. Your code of ethics is remarkably strong and you expect others (not only your partner and those closest to you, but everyone) to live honest, committed lives as well. You enjoy sharing meaningful moments in conversation with your partner as well as remembering special life events (e.g. birthdays and anniversaries).





5/9/2009 12:49:29 AM
ok hmmm things that annoy me about the Doms on here.

1) HAVE A PIC!!! it does not have to be on your profile but you better be able to produce one quick and in a hurry.

2) LEARN RESPECT just cause u like my tits does not mean u can see them... touch them ... or i want to hear about it in the first email. WTF are you a horny teenage boy?

3) NO CONTROL excuse me if you can not control your anger , your body, your life, your finances... WTF would i let you control me?

4) SUB/SLAVE REFERENCE Learn the flippin difference please How can you call your self a Dom when you can not tell the difference between the two?  My profile has had to be changed cause sooooo many of the so called Doms have no idea of the difference.

5) HYPOCRITES unless you are in extremely good looking and in the best physical shape do not expect it from your sub.  Hell I believe all Doms should be in great physical shape if they can not control themselves and push them selves away from the food and exercise you sure as hell can't expect your sub or slave to do it.



5/3/2009 3:51:01 AM
well I have found a few men on here that may be worth the time to get to know more so I am speaking with them to see what happens.  So if you message me and I respond that at this time I am not interested is cause it is too hard to juggle too many guys at once.  I am sure some of whom will be weeded out.  If not then the relationship will move forward.  I will keep people updated.

4/26/2009 7:55:45 PM
1. The healthy submissive is capable of, and thrives on, intense, intimate, emotionally open relationships. This is often evident in the number of nourishing, sustaining, and life affirming friendships she makes over the years.

2. The healthy submissive is a giver. She often needs help to ration herself because her impulses nearly always lead her to want to do good for others.

3. The healthy submissive is capable of intense joy, especially in the context of a sustaining relationship.

4. The healthy submissive finds significant relaxation when properly related. She is at ease in that place.

5. The healthy submissive has finely tuned interpersonal sensitivity. She is reactive to subtle shifts in the emotional tone of others.

6. The healthy submissive has a fluidity of self, a flexibility that enables her to adapt to changing circumstances.

7. The healthy submissive is playful.

8. The healthy submissive has no more than the usual cultural conflicts about her body, and its goodness and beauty.

9. The healthy submissive takes pride in her accomplishments.

10. The healthy submissive accepts herself as she is, knowing that while her culture values independence and self sufficiency, she has strong dependency needs and that there is no inherent wrongness about those needs.

11. The healthy submissive seeks nourishing relationships.

12. The healthy submissive, in accepting herself as is is tolerant of others. But neither will she allow anyone to tell her what her truth should be.

13. The healthy submissive has a reasonable self concept, aware of her difficulties as well as her strengths.

14. The healthy submissive hunger is to be the object of an intense and penetrating understanding. When her nature is understood and she is held in a loving and firm frame, her devotion is almost limitless. The healthy submissive has an enormous capacity for devotion, from which springs her service.

4/26/2009 7:54:50 PM
A Man who displays sensitivity will be a Master who is sensitive to you.
A Man who displays humility will be a Master who will show you respect.
A Man who is not afraid to cry will be a Master who understands your tears.
A Man who is quiet will be a Master who will hear your quietest whisper,
A Man who knows fear will be a Master who will not leave you to face yours alone.
A Man who will listen to a child will be a Master who will always work to understand your words.
A Man who can stand alone will be a Master who will not crush you under His weight.
A Man who controls Himself with ease will be a Master with the ability to control you in the same way.
A Man who does not have to prove His point will be a Master with many worthwhile points to share.
A Man who never makes demands will be a Master who treasures anything you give.
A Man who doesn't run after you will be a Master you will never need to run away from.
A Man who is calm will be a Master who can weather your storms.
A Man who has walked the path to peace will be a Master able to guide you along that path.
A Man who does not shout will be a Master who will never deafen you.
A Man who knows Himself will be a Master who will have time to know you.
A Man with an open mind will be a Master who never stops learning.
A Man who never stops learning will be a Master who never stops growing.
A Man who always seeks to be the best He can be for you is the only Man truly worthy of being called your Master

4/26/2009 7:19:48 PM
Hi all ... just a FYI I do not care how many years you have been in the lifestyle.. is there a reason the Doms think it is important? Half of the ones I have talked to if they been in the lifestyle that long need a refresher course.

4/23/2009 7:54:52 PM
ok time again to update my thoughts When i am curious about something that means i will study about it question people that are into it.  It may mean that yes i may like it or it may mean that i won't in order to make a informed decision I would have to learn about it first.

Also on a second Note.. I can tolerate some pain... Just i am no where near a pain slut.  I do not mine some when aroused but pain does not arouse me.  Pain as discipline does not have an effect on me... besides wanting to leave you.  There are plenty of other ways to correct me other then causing me to hurt.

4/21/2009 12:48:06 PM
hmmmm Is it me?  It seems to be most of the Dom profiles i have been reading want a slave with none to very few limits.  Get a life omg a real life for that matter.  Life is not a dungeon for most people that is a bit extreme.  Granted i am sure it is every Dom's fantasy to have a slave blindly obey and ask for more not matter what is done to them.  Well then u only have a mindless slave with the intelligence of a box of rocks. If that is what you think being a Dom is you are saidly mistake.  Anyone can control someone that has no spirit.  It takes a true Dom/Master to understand and win the trust of a independant  secure woman ... to help her submission be full of peace, calm and yes even enjoyment... not fear.  We should not be frighten into obeying, we should want to obey cause we know it is our Dom/Masters wants and makes him happy.  It is sad that there are many perfectly good submissive woman being made to feel like that are not good enough when it is not us it is the so called Dom that is truly a child playing a game.

4/20/2009 9:38:52 AM
thank you SirJoe1211 for this.

APPROACHING A PROSPECTIVE SUB/SLAVE
   

I am Sir Joe. I have been online for a while now, and I have had many conversations with multiple submissives. The one thing that they all have in common is the incredible exasperation and frustration they feel regarding the e-mails and IM's they get from male Dominants.

(I am directing my comments to Male not Female Dominants the rules are seemingly different for Domme's, and my comments here don't generally apply you.)

Gentlemen, this is after all a fetish life we live, BUT, if you are really the Dominant you claim to be, and a member of the lifestyle that promotes SSC (Safe, Sane, and Consensual) or RACK (Risk Aware Consensual Kink) then how is it that so many of you begin an introductory e-mail or instant message with commands you have not been given consent to make?

Hi I'm Dom (whoever) now, "On your knees bitch!" or "I want to stick my dick in your ass!" or my personal favorite "Be a good whore, and reply to me NOW!" are not the kind of phrases that any woman, sub or not will respond to. So Stop It!

I have been in this lifestyle for over 10-years, and I have met every woman I have dated since 2000 (including my last sub/wife) online. Why, because no matter who I am talking to I offer her the same respect I want for myself.

You would no more walk up to a woman at the Mall, and tell her to get on her knees, how can you assume that this will be a winning strategy online? Is it because its a fetish site? Poor assumption, if that's what you’re thinking.

This is a lifestyle based entirely on trust! Who in their right mind would trust you if your first comment was so derogatory that it was offensive. Don't get me wrong, in a scene, when consent has been given, you can talk to your sub in whatever manner turns you or her on. However, do you expect to get to a point where your having a real time encounter with a submissive, if you are so blunt and disrespectful in your initial introduction? Or even before you have established a basis for that kind of discussion, or e-mail.

Like I said, I have been online now since 1998, I have met dozens women in person, and am chatting with many others, whom I expect to meet, and there is no doubt that in their minds, or fanny's for that matter that I am Dominant. But I didn't make any overtly sexual or BDSM related comments in my initial introduction. WHY? Because when it comes to female submissives, they are not about to offer trust, or themselves to anyone who can't even respect them enough to introduce themselves in non threatening manner.
     

            RULE #1: JUST BECAUSE THEY ARE SUBMISSIVE DOESN’T MEAN THEY ARE SUBMISSIVE TO YOU!

      It doesn't matter if the sub has said, "write me, and tell me what you violent degrading things you want to do to me." why, because unless your writing a letter just to get her off, then odds are your not going to be anything more than the sender of a dirty letter. If you really want to meet her and do those things, you need to understand TRUST! It might work occasionally (1/10,000) but that is pretty poor odds. and it will be (0/1,000,000) if it is a newbie or novice sub, who is nervous to begin with.

      If you can't make a vanilla (I use the word to make my point clear) introduction of yourself to a female submissive, and establish that your not some whack job or psychopath, then don't write them at all. It is the conclusion of those of us truly in the lifestyle, that anyone who can't see the reality of trust and consent in the process is nothing more than a wannabe, who is fooling himself.

      I am personally offended by any man that has no other articulate way to introduce himself to a woman than to say, "get on your knees bitch!".

      If that is your standard introduction grow up. If your offended by what I've said, then you're exactly who I am talking about and guilty of being an asshole.

      DOM doesn't mean DICK. If you can't be Dominant, or assertive without being a dick-head, turn off your computer, jack off an go to sleep, because in the end, that is all your going to be doing anyway.

      I am Sir Joe and I am a real Leather Master, committed to this lifestyle. If you have any comments feel free to let me know. But know this, I am right.

      Ultimately, respect and trust, will be the only way you get the consent you need have a real life encounter with a sub.

      

      Written By

      Sir Joe

4/19/2009 11:59:32 PM
well i have noticed in the short time i have been on this site that 90% of the so call doms are idiots. I thought the power exchange between D/s was based on trust.  Well if I have only talked to you once I DO NOT TRUST YOU. so umm yea i am not gonna do as i am told.  If any of the so call doms on here knew their ass for a hole in the ground they would respect that not put me down for it.  Maybe i am wrong but hell if I am giving you control over my life i need to trust you that you will be doing what is best for me. sorry for the rant but geesh i swear idiots!!!

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