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My Lifestyle:
I have participated in the lifestyle for going on 16 years now. I am a product of the early internet BDSM boom. At the tender age of 19, I found yahoo chat and others who shared my deeply twisted love for the perverse. A short time later, I took what knowledge I had armed myself with and moved to offline relationships. I began this new life as a bottom, a submissive and a slave. Over time, I realized that not only do I not enjoy pain that much; I really do not have much in the way of submissive tendencies. It has always been a struggle for me to submit. That is why it was rewarding.
Moving forward, I was collared on October 11, 2007. I moved in with my Master that same week. One year and one week later, he made me his wife. He has shown me that no matter how hard I struggle with submission, I will always be his slave. I am a slave to my own need for him, just as you are a slave to the air you breathe. Without him, I would wither away into nothingness. For that reason alone, he has my total submission. He is the only one I will ever submit to. His is the only hand that will bring me pleasure or pain, unless he decides otherwise.
However; like a coin, or the force, I have two sides. There is a pressing need to assert my own dominance. With the exception of my service to him, I am the one who must be in control. I act as a household manager in our home. I take care of everything from the cleaning to monitoring the Netflix queue. I know how to delegate tasks and make sure what needs to get done is completed. I am a sensual sadist. I enjoy giving pain in a way I never could enjoy receiving it. I feed off of the devotion of a submissive when they are in their comfort zone.
Ultimately, I would love to find a submissive, bi-sexual male to bring into our lives. Someone who understands there is a hierarchy in our home and does not let that stand in the way of their service to either me or to my Master. In a perfect world, that man would be as excited about domestic work as he is serving in the bedroom. He would be reasonably fit, or at least active. He would be a sexual bottom in every way, to both me and my Master if or when we ever saw fit to use him in such a way.
My Vanilla Stuff:
- I watch too much reality TV for my own good.
- I am above average intelligence and I love to have conversations that are stimulating.
- I read everything from cookbooks to manga; from lifestyle to Stephen King.
- I love to watch movies. My favorites are good horror flicks (not much of a fan of the cheesy b movies), comedies, and yes, even a romantic comedy thrown in from time to time just to appease the female side of me. Some of the best movies ever made are Independent Films. If you agree, I would love to discuss some of my favorites.
- My dog is my best friend in the world. Anywhere I am, you can look around and she will not be far away.
- I am spiritual but not religious. I was raised as a Christian, but identify now as a Pantheist. Would love to explain the differences to anyone who is interested.
- I am a mother. I am a good mother. My kids are well adjusted, if not a little spoiled.
- I eat little to no carbs. Zero refined sugar. Even natural sugars have a hard time finding their way into my dinner plans. It just makes me feel better. (And the weight I lose is an added bonus)
- I am fortunate enough to not have to work outside of the home. My job is our home. My Master spoils me.
- Oh yea, I almost forgot the most important one; I am a gamer girl! MMO’s are my passion. Currently playing Rift and running a guild.
There is so much more to me than I can begin to type out. If you wish to become friends, drop me a line. If you think you can Master me better than my One can, do us both a favor and please don’t waste your time. I could have you crying like a schoolgirl inside of a week.
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When he touches me, it is felt down deep into my soul. When he loves me, it is the very axis that my world spins upon. When I disappoint him it feels as if my dreams shatter and lay in pieces around his feet. He is my lover, my diciplinarian, my father, my friend. He is my desire and my dreams all rolled into one. He is my teacher and my spirit. He is my husband.
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I have a very strong dislike for the phrase "Gift of submission". I am not giving him anything that doesnt come naturally to me. Quite the opposite, I feel like what I give him sorely pales in comparison to all that he gives to me. He gives me his strength when i am weak; he gives me his courage when i am scared. He takes me physically to places i had once only fantasized about.
I feel like I give him nearly nothing and it hurts my heart. What do you give a man who gives you everything? I give him the pieces of a heart broken long ago and a soul that has been shattered through years of distress. He deserves so much more than I can give. Each day I will strive harder to find something more to give the man who already has all of me. |
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When love beckons to you, follow him, though his ways are hard and steep. And when his wings enfold you, yield to him; though the sword hidden among his pinions may wound you. |
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| Age: 19 |
| Versailles,
France |
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