A friends observation nails me:

First, my response/opinion is based on my observations, and my understanding of the roles in BDSM.

Sadly, I do not have a "guide" where there is a lot of background information.

If you think about yourself and think about sensationalist, as it is defined, you probably see some pretty close alignment.

So, Sensationalist defined:

subject matter, language, or style producing or designed to produce startling or thrilling impressions or to excite and please vulgar taste.

In watching you, learning about you, reading your Collarme profile and journal, I see a lot of seeking.

Whether as a top or bottom, you seem to respond to the emotion and the exchange of power and energy. You thrill at the response to the impact when you are both giving and receiving and rejoice in that dynamic. You seem to thrill more at the dynamic than the role.

While there are those you are clearly submissive to, you seem to crave the exchange even more than the submission. You are capable of satisfying your need as a top or a bottom, which is kind of cool.

Thinking about the scene last night, was it the bondage or the sensations he put you through that made your head swim? Were you in a completely submissive state? Or, were you more helpless and riding the waves as he choreographed them? There is a difference. You seemed completely enchanted with the waves of pleasure, contact, risk, and yes adrenaline.

You also demonstrated that when I saw you top at the one party, flogging that one girl and your eyes were shining as your strikes made her squirm. You were able to feed on her responses.

You crave to experience the rollercoaster of feelings. That to me is what a sensationalist is. You seek the thrill and the rush of those experiences and truly revel in the experience. The chains and whips and ambience are all the spices to enrich the flavor. You are a switch as far as the role you might play, but a sensationalist to the core.

You also have many strong qualities that make it difficult to be a submissive, yet for some people, you possess a strong desire to please, which create a barrier to your ability to be a domme. Neither fact prevents either route, but your center appears to be best fueled by the dynamic and not the role. Many are like that, few realize it, and during life we slide along the scale as our needs and self awareness ebb and flow.

Just my opinion, I could be wrong, but.... you asked.

I am a single woman and with that information, do keep in mind financial tributes are considered welcome. I would like to spend less time at work and more time training a sub.