Are we a match?
If you are looking to see if we are a match, please read the following. Hopefully it will save us both a lot of frustration.
We are not a match if you are married or attached. I don’t mind if you are dating/playing with others as we get to know each other but I am ultimately looking for an exclusive relationship. I am not looking to replace the current thing not working for you.
We are not a match if you are a true sadist and enjoy inflicting pain for the sake of pain. I am not a masochist. A mix of pain and pleasure is a different matter but pain for pain sake will have us parting ways quickly.
We are not a match if you are not willing to have safety measures in place until I feel comfortable and trust you. Yes, I am going to want to meet in public. Yes, I am going to have safe calls. Yes, I am going to give your information to my safe call. A side note: The more we click, the more safety measure I have a need for including checking your driver’s license to verify your information. This is not a lack of trust level, this is because if we click quickly, safety becomes paramount so that my hormones are not trying to make all the decisions.
We are not a match if you are not willing to hang out occasionally with other lifestyle people. My friends are important to me. For us to truly click we have to be willing to be friends and be able to hang out occasionally in public. I am not looking for equality. I am looking for the power exchange, but being able to function in public as a couple is important to me.
We are not a match if you have a need to train me for “someone” else. I have enough friends in the lifestyle that will be glad to let me explore any aspect of play. If you are not interested in me for whom I am, you won’t be able to mold me to fit someone else’s expectations of me.
We are not a match if you need to have me naked to see if I am submissive “enough.” Dominance and submission are very much a state of mind. Though I expect to be naked at some point, it won’t prove my submission to you because I like to be naked.
We are not a match if you are not comfortable being tactile in both public and private. I am very tactile and I am not visual. I need physical contact both non-sexual and sexual. A side note here also: I try to be very respectful of others space needs. I enjoy hugs and casual contact, but I rarely initiate them unless I am sure that it is wanted. If I am in a group of people and am hugging a number of people goodbye and not you, it may be as simple as I don’t know if you want a hug.
We are not a match if you are not local. I am not looking to move in with anyone or have them move in with me at this point in my life. My family visits my house regularly so we would need a place to hang out that is not my house. This would require me to do most of the driving to get to you and the further away you are the fewer trips I can easily make.
Even if we aren’t a match, I am very willing to add to my list of friends and acquaintances. I love discussions and different viewpoints. If you think we are a match, let me know. I will be glad to open a dialogue to see if we are.
