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lillypeanut
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I am a recently realized dominate man and I am here looking for women interested in joining me to explore this side of my personality.
NOW, my idea of being a dom is not being an abusive ass-hat! That is just simply being a run of the mill abusive jerk. Not a dom. I am not here to physically or mentally abuse anyone. In fact, I want someone with whom I can be friends with in addition to whatever other relationship developes.
I am married. I'm not going to hide that or make excuses for it. I have my reasons for being here and would be willing to talk about those to someone if they wished. In this regard, I am not looking to end my marriage or to alter my "real life" in any way. Nor am I looking to do so to anyone else.
I prefer intelligent women. This is a very relative term and has little to do with education or the like. But, I appreciate someone that can write in complete sentences and knows what the word "grammar" means. I also appreciate a certain level of wit. It gets real old having to explain jokes to people.
To finish up, let me say that I am not gay or bi. Sorry guys. Nothing personal; but you boys just don't do it for me. I am also not into transexuals or crossdressers.
Finally, yes, I do have photos of myself that I can share! Real one... and not of my penis. But, I like to be discreet for obvious reasons. Talk to me a bit and I'll share.
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Since I have yet to meet anyone on this site that has conversed with me past the first email or so, I have no idea why I am writing this. Other than maybe to get it out of my system.
Well, I feel I have come to a critical point in my life. To sum up, I am a classical, stereotypical Gemini personality. Every aspect of who I am is built upon conflicting duality which I have found, to my detriment in all aspects of my life, does nothing but confuse and put off people. In short, and not to sound emo about it, people just don't understand me.
For instance, I am a very philosophical and introspective person with a great deal of empathy which gives me great insight into others. At the same time, buried deep within myself is a great capacity (and competence) for violence. If you don't see the conflict there, ask and I will try to explain it. I've spent the last twenty years of my life grappling with it. The cliff notes version is that it is a much easier and happier life having just one or the other. Either being an unrepentant bravo or the nice guy.
The conflict I find myself in regards to this site is very similar. It is the conflict between my dominate nature and the fact that I am a "nice guy". NO, this does not mean that I am a switch. Tried the submissive thing once and it did not go well at all. It is just not in my nature any where to bow down. If I force myself to do so, it is just that. Forced. Fake. So, no, not a switch.
Growing up, I was raised to be polite, respectful, and, due to my mothers dominate personality, fairly non-assertive. Which would work fine for me I suppose if I did not also end up with my mothers dominate nature. It took me years before I finally figured out what this part of me was. Now, I am trying to figure out how to live with it. Especially in a world that expects everyone to keep their heads down and not rock the boat. A world where if I speak my mind openly without the filters that I have constructed I become the ass-hat jerk.
This is largely why I ended up at this site. I have been seeking a means through which I can explore and express my dominate side. Where I can tear down my filters; even if only for a few hours. What I have found instead are just more people for whom I simply confuse.
I am a dominate male.
I am also a fairly nice guy.
On one hand, I crave grabbing a woman roughly by her hips with one hand and her hair with the other, calling her my cunt, and sating myself on her like some warrior of ancient times.
On the other, if I don't know you and we have not developed any sort of relationship where as you have submitted to me, I am going to be nice and polite. I'm not going to call a woman a whore and demand that she send me naked photos of herself if she says hi to me.
What this means is that I am apparently very apt at alienating myself from both of the types of women that I have meet on this site. I appear way to wishy-washy and spineless to half. Crude and and "player" to the other half.
It seems that here, as is in my real life, the world demands that I commit myself one way or the other. I feel that the nicer parts of me are going to be the losers in this and I am just not sure I am going to like the person that I become.
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| Age: 25 |
| Long Beach,
California |
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