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Hetero Male Dominant, 39,  Maryland
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Friends:
Phedre6NJsubChickSmyrnaRedHotsalleyonly
gowildsafelySincerlydefiantTheOriginalSin1JasmyneWondernaughtysecrets
cossylucia

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SeA

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My desires in this lifestyle are vast. I find pleasure in just about everything. It is very special to me. Something I treasure and will share only with one. Pleasure comes in many ways. You just have to be willing to trust and let go.

I have to many interest to list here. However, If curiosity gets the best of you, feel free to ask. I always enjoy good conversation.

A little about me... Let's see, I'm 39 and holding... I am single and have been for a while. I have never been married nor have I been blessed with the gift of a child. Perhaps one day it will happen. I love and adore children.

I love most all music. I enjoy hiking, skiing, museums, going to art shows, hay rides and the Theater. Phantom of the Opera is one of my favorites. I find great pleasure when I am out side hiking, riding my bike or horses. Its relaxing, peaceful and gives me time to reflect. I would enjoy someone who can appreciate the little things in life as I do.
I hope to return to medical school soon. I enjoy helping those in need. I took some time off a few years ago to help my family. After all, family is very important to me. The moon slowly cast its mysterious beam over the tips of the trees that cover the mountain. A gentle warm summer breeze blows through the meadow. Standing here I gaze upon the stars that fill the sky with endless possibilities. Filled with hopes and dreams I close my eyes and cast my wish upon a falling star.


I stand alone on this warm summer night wishing you were here. I close my eyes and for a moment and you stand beside me. Intoxicated with your beauty, I stand here captive by the spell you have cast upon me...

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 Dominant Male

 Maryland

 5' 5"

 150 lbs

 39

 Hetero

 Caucasian

 10/22/05

 11/17/11

Actively Seeking:

Submissive Female

Friends Only

 Lives For:

 Scuba Diving

 Skiing

 Loves:

 Amusement Parks

 Antique Shows

 Art Galleries

 Beachcombing

 Fine Dining

 Flea Markets

 Movies

 Museums

 Musical Theater

 Renaissance Faires

 Shopping

 Travel

 Volunteerism

 Bicycling

 Camping

 Hiking

 Horseback Riding

 Rafting

 Rollerblading

 Running

 Drawing

 Painting

 Archaeology

 Astronomy

 Biology

 Chemistry

 Economics

 History

 Mathematics

 Nutrition

 Philosophy

 Physics

 Poetry

 Writing

 1950s Lifestyle

 Lifestyle BDSM

 Alternative Music

 Americana

 Blues

 Classical Music

 Eighties Music

 Electronica / EDM

 Heavy Metal Music

 Industrial Music

 Jazz

 New Age Music

 New Wave

 Nineties Music

 Reggae

 Rock Music

 Auto Racing

 Baseball

 Football

 Sky Diving

 Snowboarding

 Swimming

 Tennis

 Volleyball

 Likes:

 Coffee Shops

 Fishing

 Garage Sales

 Going to the Opera

 SCA

 Conservative Politics

 Intellectual Discourse

 Psychology

 Country Music

 Folk Music

 Funk

 Oldies

 Punk Rock Music

 Seventies Music

 Basketball

 Ice Hockey

 Soccer

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Journal Entries:
12/3/2010 1:15:25 PM
SileSoft and Silent Whispered Thoughts....
 *Gently places his hand beneath her chin.
*Drifts off thinking of you, in the still of the evening, without sunlight to intrude.
*I see the twilight's in your eyes, as the moon sets up the mood.
*Playing music soft and low, romance fills the air.
*I can't help but feel aroused the very moment you come near.
*Candles flicker their flames. The smell of your sweet skin seems to drive my lust insane.
*Looking into your eyes as I run my fingers through your hair.
*Tasting the sweetness of your neck, intoxicating by your scent.
*Nibbling on your ear, I whisper words of love as you answer with a smile.
*And in your own sexy way, your sweet body comes alive.
*You are the heat of my desire as we slowly come undress, has I welcome your caress.
*You have a taste I cannot resist, when I touch you with a kiss...
 *Silent Whispered Thoughts....

10/19/2010 10:35:19 AM
Tomorrow

Love is bitter, yet it is the bread that keeps us alive.

Over and over it fills us up, only to starve us.
The people whom we love shape our destinies and our strengths.
Yet leave us cold and alone in the darkness.
Is this a test of faith or devotion?
There are other's trying to race to the end.
Occasionally, we bump into one or two.
The bonds we form help us down the path less lonely
But eventually, we lose each other in the darkness.
Alone is not a bad way to be.
It clears your head  focuses you on the journey.
Cherish the short intervals during the quest you have with others.
But be prepared to walk alone in the darkness.
For  we no not what tomorrow will bring.

9/3/2010 9:44:41 PM
Choices
 
Youthful dreams flourish in Our minds as we travel the paths of life.

Choices, decisions of various kinds. Choosing a husband,Sir,Master.

Reality strikes, truth revealed.

Often hurt, seldom healed.

Shackles and chains of existence bind.

Some move forward, the rest left behind.

A Hand stretched here, a groveling there.

Dreams held dear. Take a chance. Do we dare?

A Master found. A Master lost.

Honor bound at any cost.

Death comes near and often with pain.

All that was "dear" was the Agony of Chains.

7/22/2010 3:25:29 PM

Invitation

Be not afraid of me, you're in good hands.
I have you in mind when I make my demands,
refer to the check list, just as it stands,
I will try to please you.
I still will be firm, to leave you no doubt,
you're in the hands.

The questions I ask are important to me,
to make sure you're spanked right here on my knee,
and be it assured that I hear your plea,
I will always try to please you.
Your curiosity has to be cured,
with pleasure and pain you've never endured,
You'll scream and you'll cry and you'll be assured,
you're in the hands.

The secrets within us must be unlocked.
Please be assured my intentions are pure,
I am extreme, you'll be asked to endure,
many painful things so you will be sure,
you're in the hands.

Experience shows if we want to grow,
willingly, we have to try to bestow,
all of the small things, we really must know,
I will always try to please you.
Understanding is first if we want to ensure,
our meeting goes right, we both act mature,
we can wait to reach limits when you feel secure,
you're in the hands.

Honesty and trust reflect what I say,
a gentleman first, a sadist at play,
until I am with you, please don't dismay,
I will try to please you.
Although I am kinky, I can't deny,
I want you to know, my morals are high.

Once you are with me, you'll never ask why,
you're in the hands.




2/9/2010 9:45:44 AM
Fetish...

I bet You look good in latex,
Getting off having rough sex,
Surprise, round and round the bed,
Restrained while I fuck your head,

You are my fetish....

Gaze down, it's time to be my dog,
I'll push, to get you in that fog,

You are my fetish......

Pain turns to pleasure fast,
Relax, while i pound your ass,
Cool cat, cool cat, come on i'll give you some,
Oh, yea, gonna, i'm gonna watch you cum,

You are my fetish.....
You are my fetish......
You are my fetish.......

I order you, you, you,
You better m-m-mind,
I order you, you, you,
You better m-mind,
I order you, you, you,
You better m-m-mind,
I order you, you, you,
You better m-mind,

Joan Jett....

1/22/2010 4:13:16 PM
In His eyes, she is beautiful
To the world, she remains plain.

In His eyes she can do no wrong
To the world she is a fool.

In His eyes, Nothing but honey flows from her tongue
To the world, she is vile and most evil.

In His eyes, she is everything He has ever wanted.
To the world, she is not wanted at all.

She is what He believes her to be.

For in the sunshine of His love..

She grows, blossoms and develops into all that He desires her to be.

His love makes her whole.

A being of depth, compassion and sensuality
Awaking to the power of love, of His love.

"Beauty is in the eye of it's owner"

12/12/2009 10:00:54 AM
"~Charred~ black thorns of betrayal penetrates my aching heart...

A memory of you painted in my mind like a beautiful piece of priceless art

Forgotten dreams...~ Diminished dreams~.. My soul has withered away with your love..

Happiness is forever lost with the song of a heavenly white dove

Your buried dark sins have pushed you away...

This hell you have created will always stay."

12/9/2009 6:36:45 PM

~Pondering~..what has happened to me?? ...Having so much to say...I just want to scream...

Something's pulling,
Something's reaching,
Something's stretching,
Something's entangling,
Something's engulfing,
Something's pushing,
Something's grasping.

It's anger.
So powerful.
It's rage.
So wonderful.

It wants to take me,
To make me it's own.
I'm easy prey
For I am alone.

I feel it creeping,
Overtaking my soul,
Filling me with darkness,
Making me cold.

I'm weak, unprepared.
I have to give in
To this dark, sinister,
Most evil sin.

But what will happen
If I let it overtake?
Will I become different?
One of revenge's make?

I'm afraid to let go.
I'm afraid to open up.
I'm afraid to take a drink
From anger's misshapen cup.

But I have no choice.
I have to give in
To this rising rage
Welling within.

I move involuntarily.
I'm no longer in control.
My hands move of their own accord.
Everything is growing cold.

I don't know
What's going on.
It's all so fast.
Is the horror gone?

I look down.
My hands drip blood.
What was supposed to be a flower
Now dies a bud.

My anger's controlling.
I'm totally lost.
I would not have relented
If I'd known the cost.

The blood drips silently
Onto the floor.
The anger has penetrated
Through to my core.

I'm feeling a rush.
I can't help but enjoy
The feeling of power
Of this morbid ploy.

It courses through me.
My heart grows hard,
Incapable of mercy--
All compassion is barred.

I'm drowning in a black,
Blinded by red.
It seems that anger
Is where I'll make my bed.

Rescue is hopeless,
I'm worthless to save.
I will forever be
Anger's slave.

~whispers~...Anger...  embracing the sharpness of it's only release~

11/14/2009 6:54:54 PM
The scent of black roses

A cold shade of morning falls upon broken shadows

A velvet tear slides down a silken face...

A goodbye kiss, A whisper of death.

Shying through the night, the black sound of love..
Flawless slavery of the body..

Herald of her own destruction.

He has cried his last tear.. In it, he dies.

He hides his face in the crimson shadow..
He calls for the blessing of darkness, the blessing of oblivion..
~running~ from the harsh daylight..
~revealing~ his darkness..

He cries for the shadows.. His last tears.

He watches Her through a shattered mirror.

The knife in his chest.

His Death, courts her. He oh so soft promises.

"Do you hear me?"
"Can you see me?"

"No longer lost in the shadows, for I have become the shadows

Blending with the night. He hides from the light.

Why is it... When he cries..

The only One that hears him, is the One he cannot have....
The only One that hears him scream, is the One that quiets his fears.

Is the One already gone?

Why does he watch Her?... Her lips upon his."Else wrap my heart, in a sheet of bleeding ice". feel his pain no more.

Promises of sweet surrender, bloody kisses, the scent of black roses."

7/25/2009 11:38:57 AM
 
Seether -  FMLYHM
 
You could've been the real one
You could've been the one enough for me
You could've been the free one
(the broken down and sick one)
Remnant of a vacant life

You come around when you find me faithless
You come around when you find me faceless
Fuck me like you hate me
(dig it up and tear it down)
Dig it up and hold me out
Fuck me like you hate me
(dig it up and tear it down)
I love the sound when you come undone

You could've been the next one
(God only knows)
You could've been the one to comprehend me
You could've been the only one
(the broken down and sick one)
You could've been the one who I lie with

You come around when you finally face this
You come around when you find me faceless

Fuck me like you hate me
(dig it up and tear it down)
Dig it up and hold me out
Fuck me like you hate me
(dig it up and tear it down)
Don't make a sound 'til I come undone

You'll never break me
You'll never break me
You'll never break me

You could've been the real one
You could've been the last one i'd lie with
You could've been the old one
I should've been the one who died

You come around when you finally face this
You come around when you find me faceless
 
Fuck me like you hate me
(dig it up and tear it down)
Dig it up and hold me out
Fuck me like you hate me
(dig it up and tear it down)
I love the sound when you come undone
Fuck me like you hate me
(fuck you like you hate me)
Fuck me like you hate me
(you'll never break me)
Fuck me like you hate me
(dig it up, tear it down)
You'll come around when you find me faceless

7/24/2009 4:22:12 PM
Time Changes Everything 
 
Hours passed yet it was only but a few minutes. Twenty Five  year have passed since our first child hood kiss. What seemed a lifetime ago seems like only a moment in time. The innocent letters we exchanged as kids are now wrinkled pieces of paper I hold dearly as a map to a lost treasure. The  innocence and how naive we are as a child. If only it could past on to our adolescence and carried on. But sadly if fades just as our limitless dreams and make believe. The eyes of a child or limitless. It is ashamed that as we grow older we lose them. 
 
Fifth teen years have passed since the last times our eyes last embraced. It was time stood still. Both in Grad school, single, each had the world in the palm of our hands.  Our eyes could not glance away. It was as if we are stuck in time helpless and all along wanting to reach out and grab the other and hang on for what we both knew was something so rare, so amazing and intoxication yet, our ambitions got in the way.
 
Our one change of eternal happiness is now lost in time. We will never know what could have been. What is known is that since then we both have been unlucky in love to such extremes one wonders if the God of Love Eros is punishing us for allowing such a wonderful opportunity pass through the palm of our hands.
 
It is time. She has arrived and one glance in her eyes and I know. What was is no longer. What we had for so many years life has taken it's toll on both of us. A failed marriage, and my many years of failed relationships. Life has been cruel to both of us. I believe deep down inside we both know that the kind of love we once knew is no longer out there. The innocence we both knew, has been damaged by a failed, unfaithful usband, and several unfaithful girlfriends. Now it is filled us with despair and the lost of a dream. 
 
After a few hours we say goodbye and she is off to NC where I doubt our paths will ever cross again.  What started out as childhood sweethearts ended in sadness. We both lost that childhood innocence and that dream that anything is possible. 
 
Now I sit here wondering only after an hour after she just left. What started out as childhood sweethearts ended in smile filled with sadness knowing our paths will never meet again.

9/14/2008 6:06:43 PM

She can feel His thoughts...

~Drifting~ to and fro,
from doubt to belief..

..and somewhere in the middle is she.
~Swaying~ in the breezes of reason.

For she is torn from her years of experience,
that says it can not be,
and the feeling in her heart that says "she is".

She is not able to deny Him,
for the presence of His image,
late at night, ~blazed~ upon the ceilings of her mind.

His arms have reached out to hold her.

she has dreamed His sweet caresses into reality.

She must not doubt.


3/17/2008 7:57:27 PM

Tenderness and kindness are not signs of weakness and despair. They are manifestations of strength and resolution. Being a real dominate requires that you seek the keynotes and triggers buried deep inside the submissive.

To capture and control the body, one must first capture and control the mind.

To please ones flesh last but a moment. To touch ones soul lasts a lifetime.

Her place is at her master's feet, never under them.


2/24/2008 12:24:02 PM

Her search seemed endless. Night after night, date after date has left her feeling empty and alone. Was her search to end in vain? Did he not exist but only in her dreams? Her passion, her desire to give was only matched with her obsession to please him.

Her need to be loved, her desire to feel she was the only one, her needs were overwhelming. Yet each time she was left in disappointment and unfulfilled. Wanting to open up and share so much. To explore a lifestyle that can only be explained as intoxicating, addicting, obsessive and unconditional love. To feel his touch, his lips embracing hers if only for a moment.

To feel his arms embracing her knowing she is the only one in his life. Where is he? Why has he not come into her life? Why does he not find her? Why have their paths not crossed? So close to giving up but perhaps one more night.

She patiently waits.  Even a glimpse into his eyes. Perhaps a name.

Anxiously she waits for him...


10/6/2007 8:46:53 PM

"In the cold night your ivory body and keen eyes
Have left bright reflections in the forest above the falls.

The clear midnight sky, under my closed lids,
Still shines..I am drunk from so many scents
that you have left behind.
Stronger than wine, they intoxicate me.

Leaving their homes, the perfumes have followed me....
I drink their brief breath, I breathe their life.
All of them are here.

It's a miracle....The stars have risen,
Hastily, across the wide branches
Where the melted gold pours.

Now, among the trees and the stars,
You, here in my clearing, loosening your robe,
And your nakedness glistens for my pleasure.

Your unspeakable gaze rests on my eyes....
Without stars and without plants, I dream the impossible...

In the cold night."

 


9/28/2007 2:22:25 PM

Sitting with my tea, my pen in my hand, the images of life whirl by.

Visions of a time that was, and of a time as yet to be, enrapture me.

Some as solid as Earth. Some ghosts, too faint to be described.

Not so your eyes.

Why do they hold so much power?...What truth have you found that I so seek?....

I try so
very hard to control the visions, but, I find myself lost within them.

Something in the passion that you have for life..Has invaded now my thoughts, where
once, you captivated my nights.

A peaceful reign.

A powerful flame...that lit this mornings dawn...You have grown, yet I see the
dawn has gone.

What thoughts caress you now, sweet dream, as the birds break out in flight?...

Did you
find me waiting there, when you slipped the bonds of night?

If so, did you feel my cautious hands?...Did you sense my presence there?....Did you find
the passion in the orange sunrise flare?

I know.

You were never really here.

Somewhere, you dreamed.

While I sat,

Pen in hand,


7/13/2007 4:36:40 PM

Locked in her kennel, she lies awake

listening to the dark sounds of the night

reaching deep within her soul and holding onto

a feeling
 
gently she strokes the worn fur beneath her soft

cheek feeling a soothing comfort

cherishing the gift she has been given

a collar

freedom

life

Her dream.


4/25/2007 11:31:51 AM

I want you....

I want you....longing to hear my voice. Heart leaping, paths crossing,
exploring, consoling, comforting, unexpected smile mid day, enveloping,
soul-baring conversations. Two so lucky, so blessed, finding light, solace
through the cold, damp fog life and circumstance present.

I want you....aching for my touch, wondering what pleasure may soon
follow. Imagining, wondering, dreaming of the day voices and electronic
banter becomes reality.

I want you....quivering at the slightest trace of my hand on your upper
thigh. Slowly, deliberately, purposely gliding upward paradise found.

I want you....begging my collar. Body slick with anticipation, heart
pounding, pleading for acceptance, adoration without reservation, soul so
cruelly neglected, damaged, resurrected, healed...no, freed...thighs spread,
head lowered...submission pledged....devotion promised....love everlasting.

But if I could have one desire met this evening, one wish granted among
endless requests. I would discover it in your smile...contentment
found....bright as morning snow in sunlight....your laugh...flirtatious,
joyous, wings spread flying away from past anger and betrayal toward faith
and a future nearly blinded by promise...

I want you....above all things....happy.


4/17/2007 12:47:19 PM

He bound her wrists and tied her tight.

Secured to His bed, without a fight.

He made her beg.. He took control.

And gained her heart while she lost her soul.

H
e brought her to new heights of need.

Her desires laced with endless greed.

His touch inflamed, made her aware.

Of every nerve that pleasured there.

He forced her up onto all fours.

As she struggled and moaned, He made her His.

He entered her and took those things

That only domination brings.

Her body and soul are His for the keeping.

As He awakened a life deep within her, sleeping...


4/12/2007 1:47:12 PM

Out through the fields and the woods
And over the walls I have wended;
I have climbed the hills of view
And looked at the world, and descended;
I have come by the highway home,
And lo, it is ended.

The leaves are all dead on the ground,
Save those that the oak is keeping
To ravel them one by one
And let them go scraping and creeping
Out over the crusted snow,
When others are sleeping.

And the dead leaves lie huddled and still,
No longer blown hither and thither;
The last lone aster is gone;
The flowers of the witch-hazel wither;
The heart is still aching to seek,
But the feet question 'Whither?'

Ah, when to the heart of man
Was it ever less than a treason
To go with the drift of things,
To yield with a grace to reason,
And bow and accept the end
Of a love or a season?

--Robert Frost.


3/9/2007 8:57:59 PM
How Many Roads Must A Man Walk Down Before He Admits He Is Lost? Like that will ever happen.

Tell a man there are 300 billion stars in the universe and he'll believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint on it and he'll have to touch to be sure... Gotta love us!!..  

Who I'd like to meet:
All the pleople who told me... No, he doesn’t bite?. ... As they pull him off my leg..The bastard!! My brakes are fine... As we slide off the road... Damn airbags kicked my ass. Are you sure the power is off?... As I am being fried... Friends... Gotta love them... 

8/25/2006 9:55:23 PM

Her name is inspiration. Grace, elegance, charm her friends. Alluring, poise, sensuality compliment her.

Gilda: Now isn't this something? It's a small world in Argentina, isn't it?
Johnny: Isn't it? Why did you marry him?
Gilda: My husband's a very attractive man.
Johnny: You don't love him.
Gilda: What was that word again, Johnny?
Johnny: You married him for his money.
Gilda: That happened to come with it.
Johnny: Now, that's a great way to make a living.
Gilda: That wouldn't be the big pot calling the little kettle black, now would it?
Johnny: I was down and out. He picked me up. Put me on my feet.
Gilda: Now isn't that an amazing coincidence, Johnny. That's practically the story of my life.

Despite Gilda's seductive power that lures Johnny in, once she is married to him, it is impossible for her ever to escape his domination. The full picture of Johnny's wrath and Gilda's loss of all power are seen in the hotel scene, when Gilda begs him to release her. She is emotionally wrecked, in contrast to the composed dominating man. When Gilda lies at his feet sobbing and pleading with him to let her go, he clearly holds her life in his hands. Despite the apparent control that she possessed over him , his control and domination overpowers her as he determines her fate.


8/23/2006 9:31:59 PM

Tangled up in blue

Early one mornin' the sun was shinin',
I was layin' in bed
Wond'rin' if she'd changed at all
If her hair was still red.
Her folks they said our lives together
Sure was gonna be rough
They never did like mama's homemade dress
Papa's bankbook wasn't big enough.
And i was standin' on the side of the road
Rain fallin' on my shoes
Heading out for the east coast
Lord knows i've paid some dues gettin' through,
Tangled up in blue.

She was married when we first met
Soon to be divorced
I helped her out of a jam, i guess,
But i used a little too much force.
We drove that car as far as we could
Abandoned it out west
Split up on a dark sad night
Both agreeing it was best.
She turned around to look at me
As i was walkin' away
I heard her say over my shoulder,
"we'll meet again someday on the avenue,"
Tangled up in blue.

I had a job in the great north woods
Working as a cook for a spell
But i never did like it all that much
And one day the ax just fell.
So i drifted down to new orleans
Where i happened to be employed
Workin' for a while on a fishin' boat
Right outside of delacroix.
But all the while i was alone
The past was close behind,
I seen a lot of women
But she never escaped my mind, and i just grew
Tangled up in blue.

She was workin' in a topless place
And i stopped in for a beer,
I just kept lookin' at the side of her face
In the spotlight so clear.
And later on as the crowd thinned out
I's just about to do the same,
She was standing there in back of my chair

Said to me, "don't i know your name?"
I muttered somethin' underneath my breath,
She studied the lines on my face.
I must admit i felt a little uneasy
When she bent down to tie the laces of my shoe,
Tangled up in blue.

She lit a burner on the stove and offered me a pipe
"i thought you'd never say hello," she said
"you look like the silent type."
Then she opened up a book of poems
And handed it to me
Written by an italian poet
From the thirteenth century.
And every one of them words rang true
And glowed like burnin' coal
Pourin' off of every page
Like it was written in my soul from me to you,
Tangled up in blue.

I lived with them on montague street
In a basement down the stairs,
There was music in the cafes at night
And revolution in the air.
Then he started into dealing with slaves
And something inside of him died.
She had to sell everything she owned
And froze up inside.
And when finally the bottom fell out
I became withdrawn,
The only thing i knew how to do
Was to keep on keepin' on like a bird that flew,
Tangled up in blue.

So now i'm goin' back again,
I got to get to her somehow.
All the people we used to know
They're an illusion to me now.
Some are mathematicians
Some are carpenter's wives.
Don't know how it all got started,
I don't know what they're doin' with their lives.
But me, i'm still on the road
Headin' for another joint
We always did feel the same,
We just saw it from a different point of view,
Tangled up in blue.

                         Bob Dylan


8/2/2006 12:59:39 PM

Devious...

I crave you and you continue to taunt me. You tell me things you know I crave to hear. You know I miss you. So why do you torture my soul? You speak of desires as to keep me wanting more.  I cannot walk away and this you know.

How can I not think of you, when you are the only thought I have. Keeping my thoughts and desire from you will be a challenge. I want to tell you everything. Why I have such trust in you that I do not understand. I trust so very few.

You are my thought. One that I fight to remove. You are the fruit I have never tasted and I am helpless to resist. My battle seems to be in vain. Your words feed my obsession. I can almost see the look in your eye as you lure me closer. Knowing you have me captive... Devious, that you are.


4/13/2006 1:23:42 PM

                              Destiny

He is 39 years old, soft-spoken and a helpless romantic.  But in the final days of his life, he revealed an unknown side of his psyche. This hidden quasi-Jungian persona .surfaced during the Agatha Christie-like pursuit for his long-reputed soulmate.

Sadly, the protracted search seems endless and  in complete and utter failure. Yet even in certain defeat,  I cling to the belief  that life is not merely a series of meaningless accidents or coincidences. But rather it's a tapestry of events  that culminate in an exquisite, sublime plan.

Ultimately, I  concluded that if we are to live life in harmony with the universe, we must all possess a powerful faith in what the ancients used to call "fatum,"

What we currently refer to as destiny....


4/8/2006 8:55:35 AM
There are just so many things that I enjoy in this lifestyle. So feel free to ask. I have nothing to hide. However, most of the things I truly enjoy, I keep tucked away until I find that one person who completes me. Until then, I patiently wait.

Life is an adventure. Unless you try something, how will you ever know what you might truly enjoy?

Just a thought....

4/3/2006 7:21:40 PM

Sleep eludes me once again. I cannot stop thinking about you. I will never understand how you found your way inside my soul. Years I have guarded my heart, only allowing a piece at a time to be taken. Never have I trusted so deeply.

I sit here wondering. I crave you and you continue to tease me. Telling me things you know I need to hear. You know I miss you. So why do you torture me? Telling me things you desire as to keep me wanting more.  I cannot walk away and you know that.

How can I not think of you, when you are the only thought I have? Keeping my thoughts and desire to myself will be a challenge. I want to tell you everything. Why I have such trust in you, that, I cannot explain. I never truly trusted anyone.

You are my thought. One that I fight to remove, yet unable to. You are the fruit I have never tasted. My battle seems to be in vain. You know just what to say to keep me wanting more. I can almost see the look in your eyes as you lure me closer with each word that passes from your lips. Knowing you have me captivated my attention.

I am attentive to your needs as you are with mine. We feed off each other. When you feel I need you, you are always there with just the right words... "I miss you" and I smile each and every time.

Sometimes I wonder if you will never get the chance to read these letters I write each day to you.  But in some way, it helps me to write.  Maybe its the dreamer inside of me hoping, perhaps one day we will find each other.

I will allow fate to run its course. And believe everything happens for a reason. Until then, I continue to gaze each night and wish upon a falling star.


3/6/2006 9:12:49 PM

Thoughts....

A voice can be so powerful with intensity, yet never raise above a whisper. It can send sensuous chills down your spine and fuel the fires of your passion. It can entice you to feel and do things you thought not possible. Do you hear it?....

To capture and control the body, one must first capture and control the mind....

To please ones flesh last but a moment. To touch ones soul lasts a lifetime....

I crave her touch, her love. I crave her laughter, her joy, her happiness. I crave her gift of submission, her relinquish of control.

Dose this woman I crave to call mine exist? Is there an honest, trustworthy, secure, strong woman out there? I wish to be her partner. To share with her all that I am. Letting herself go and knowing I will support, encourage and embrace her. I dream of the day our paths cross. The day our souls meet and our search ends as our journey will just begin. 


1/14/2006 8:38:02 PM

Two souls pass in the night destined to be one

 I sit here with thoughts of you as a gentle breeze kisses my skin. The day is cloudy and cool from the nights rain that quenches the thirst of nature. My soul never seems to rest from what so many have inflicted. My days are filled with loneliness, heartache and questions. You will replace them with peace, harmony and tranquility.

I stare out the window as the music plays wishing you were in my arms. Wishing I could hold you tightly never letting go. I long for the day that our eyes meet. To look deep into your eyes and find myself lost within them. Words won't be necessary for our eyes will say all we need to know.

Each day our souls will grow closer. What started off as two souls passing in the night, will one day become one.  I want to find myself lost within you. I am here and you are there yet the distance that separates us will one day be no more. Two souls pass in the night destined to be one.

My thoughts are open to you has I hold nothing back. I want to share all I have with you. You are my life, the air I breath, the passion I have searched a lifetime. You will be my best friend.  Your love will embraced me, taking my heart and caressing it with kindness. Your words will comfort me and allow me to feel inner peace.

I can almost feel you here with me. Wishing I could touch you, I close my eyes. I dream of the day our eyes meet. The day my hand glides through your soft hair. The day I look deep into your eyes and say those three words that capture ones heart... I love you..... Then embracing lips consummating our love. That day our souls will find peace.

Well, my love I must close for now. I hope to see you in my dreams.
 

 


1/5/2006 4:18:55 AM

Does she know.....

As I sit here deep in thought, I wonder if she knows how much I desire her.  My eyes grow heavy but my mind races. Filled with thoughts of her I cannot seem to sleep. Each moment apart seems a lifetime. I count the minutes until she is finally in my arms. Yesterday was not soon enough. Tomorrow is to far away.

I wonder if she knows I miss her.  Does she know my heart has a void only she can fill? My days are filled with thoughts of her. My nights are filled with dreams of us.  If only to look into her eyes but once. If only to taste her lips or breathe the scent of her hair. If only but once, I would cherish those moments for a lifetime.

I wonder if she knows that I am thinking of her?  Can she hear me calling out her name?  If only she could gaze into my eyes, then she would know.  One look, one kiss or one touch of my hand , then she will know.  She will know she belongs to me. To serve me, to crawl to me and to worship me like a good little girl.

As she sits at my feet hoping to please me she will know. Does she feel my love for her, my desire and my passion?  As my leather kisses her tender flesh, she will know.  When my hand is filled with her hair, she will know. When my collar and leash are around her tender neck she will know. 

Crawl to me  little girl.  Take my hand and lets start our journey.  I will guide you, show you and teach you my ways.  Your heart, soul and body belong to me now.  I will cherish them.

Soon my love. Soon our life together will begin and you will never feel alone again.  My strength will give you pleasure just as your desires will pleasure me.  Once we start there is no turning back. For our love will grow with each new day.

Where are you my little girl?...


 


12/28/2005 10:01:21 AM

Some where in the night she waits for me.

The moon slowly cast its mysterious beam over the tips of the trees that cover the mountain. A gentle warm summer breeze blows through the meadow. Standing here I gaze upon the stars that fill the sky with endless possibilities for wishes. Filled with hopes and dreams I close my eyes and cast my wish upon a falling star.
I stand along on this warm summer night reaching out for my little girl. I've but once, many years ago, felt the love that the great god of love Eros offers to a chosen few.  A love so pure and true never to be questioned by others.  
I stand alone on this warm summer night wishing you were here. I close my eyes and for a moment and you stand beside me. Intoxicated with your beauty, I stand here captive by your spell you have cast on me. I look into your eyes and see a little girl searching for her master. Your words tell me of your desire, your passion and your longing to serve me.
Sliding my fingers through your hair, stroking it softly, I look into your soul and I know you are mine for all your fears, worries and desires are placed with in my hands.  
Some where in the night, standing all alone, is my little girl. She reaches for her master knowing he will protect her, guide and love her.
Come to me my little girl rest your head upon my lap. Close your eyes my little girl and fill your mind with dreams


12/27/2005 12:44:25 AM
"I could choose to be purely good, but I will not. I could choose to be purely evil, but I will not. I will be neutral. In that way I am free to be what suits me best, and no man can predict my actions."
-Lycorne

11/13/2005 3:53:57 PM

The power of the mind

Mind sex is the ability to make a sub orgasm through voice. I am not speaking of being trained to orgasm on command, but I am referring to the transmitting of one's power with such intensity by voice, tone, and words, that a sub orgasms from it. It is based on connection and power.

It is on the basis of one's pleasure not being based on a physical act, but feeling his power and knowing his pleasure that enables mind sex to exist. Mind sex is nothing more than letting you feel his power and know his pleasure through words and tone of voice…to the point of orgasm.

Now lets speak of the power of mind sex. What it potential is, where it can lead you and how it can enslave you.

Mind sex serves several purposes: First it allows you to explore safely (especially the edge), in the mind without risking the physical.  It helps discover potential problems without experiencing it in real life.  The effort to do it this way, in the mind, builds intimacy.  

Secondly, it is a power in and of itself to have you orgasm, without touching you. Even against your "will," and is about as powerful an experience as one can get.

But the greatest effect is taking the principle of  pleasure that is based on feeling his power and knowing his pleasure to the nth degree, not the physical act. It puts you into a state where you are aroused, but calm; hungry, but satisfied; desperate but patient. It makes you feel alive, fulfilled and complete all without being touched.

There are three separate reasons for this. The first is based on that one is a want, always hungry always a need to fulfill and satisfy.

The second is based on the basis of his power. One is raw intensity, that creates the desire, hunger and drives you to your knees It is the most intense experience of your life.  The other is that no matter how powerful the intensity is, it is always secondary to the need to do what is right and good to keep you safe and cherished. Essentially the intensity is always encased in the need to do what is right and good. This allows you to let go totally and yet feel completely safe.

The third is His power and pleasure. The power creates the arousal, the hunger, the desperation. The pleasure brings the calm, the satisfaction and the fulfillment.

Because of this, every act, from the mundane to the extreme, to nothing but being in his presence becomes pleasurable.  Becomes where you will not simply obey, but you will crave the opportunity to please.  You will exit for his pleasure, all the time, because it makes you feel alive. It will enslave you, if the connection is that right.

Yes, this speaks of  the idealized world, and nothing is ALL THE TIME. But you would be surprised of the things you did not care to do, or get pleasure from, will become very pleasurable, so that you will want to do them and enjoy doing them.  It is addictive, it is powerful, it is total, it is complete.  This is the potential, but the fit has to be  right to get there and it takes a strong Master and a strong Slave.


11/4/2005 9:02:33 AM

When you say nothing at all

It's amazing how you can speak right to my heart
Without saying a word you can light up the dark
Try as I may I could never explain
What I hear when you don't say a thing

The smile on your face lets me know that you need me
There's a truth in your eyes sayin' you'll never leave me
The touch of your hand says you'll catch me if ever I fall
You say it best when you say nothing at all

All day long I can hear people talking out loud
But when you hold me near, you drown out the crowd
   Old Mr. Webster could never define
What's being said between your heart and mine

The smile on your face lets me know that you need me
There's a truth in your eyes sayin' you'll never leave me
The touch of your hand says you'll catch me if ever I fall
You say it best when you say nothing at all

The smile on your face lets me know that you need me
There's a truth in your eyes sayin' you'll never leave me
The touch of your hand says you'll catch me if ever I fall
You say it best when you say nothing at all

 Alison krauss

 


10/31/2005 10:18:37 AM

I am a dominant man. I am just that. I am not dominant because of any superiority on my part. Not because I feel I am more intelligent or wiser. I am not dominant because of the strength or mass of my body. I am not, nor would I want to be, dominant with all women.
 
Yet to you, I am Master.
I am your Master only after earning your trust, and I embrace your submissiveness. I have looked into your heart and mind and clearly see your desires and passions. You have thrown away your fears and inhibitions. You tell me of the needs of your heart and body. You have given me total access to your soul, and I accept the responsibility and honor.

You are a woman. 
You are not weak or inferior because of it. You are a treasure to be cherished. We are not equal. I have the strength of body and mind and the instinctive need to protect, possess, defend and provide for you. You are a woman and instinctively stronger of will and heart. Your belief in me gives me courage and direction. Your strength disperses my doubt. Your needs and desires encourage and give purpose to my efforts.

We are not equal.
We are halves of a whole. We compliment each other and make each other complete. My desire to dominate you is instinctive. It is not to degrade you nor is it degrading to you because you are secure in being totally feminine. We each recognize and accept our worth and our need for someone to trust and fulfill our needs.

You are sure, strong and proud in your womanhood. You do not submit as acceptance of inferiority, but from strength and passion. You expect a man to stand strong and be a man. You desire and flourish in the strength and control of a man. In return, you present control of your body, unqualified trust and honesty, and the faithfulness of your heart. You submit because I have earned your trust. Because I have opened my heart and soul to you. Because I have listened to your words with my ears and heart and have learned to anticipate your needs and emotions. And because I have proven worthy in your eyes, you have given me the only true treasure of life; you have given me dominance over you.

What you give is not abnormal, but pure, natural and the rarest gift a woman give a man. You have given me complete and unshakable assurance of your commitment to me. Your submissiveness is a magnificent gift and sacred responsibility. I accept this from you with humility and joy. I understand the rarity and purity of this gift. I recognize it is your body and soul, your heart and mind. I dominate you only because you have allowed it. I dominate only because you have allowed me to and when I see your body kneel before me, in my mind and heart you are raised above all other woman, and all the treasures of the earth.

What you give freely can not in reality be bought.


10/28/2005 7:51:04 AM

Submission
It was a warm summer night. The moon was full and cast its illumination upon the gentle flowing stream.  The stars filled the heavens with wishes that only dreams have sought.  As you stand there listening to the gentle water passing and surrounded by the tranquility of the forest you sigh.  Lost in the peace of your surroundings, you close your eyes and embrace its gift.  

So long has it been since you felt the warmth of someone's arms around you.  So long has it been since the passionate kiss of leather has embraced you teaching you the ways of a master.  You long for the strength of his voice, the power of his eyes and the firmness of his hands.  To have him take control of the little girl that is longing to escape from the depths of your soul.  To have him mold you, guide you and teach you his ways.  To have him treat you as his precious little girl one moment and a naughty little slut the next. 

You crave to feel his soft gentle lips caressing you.  Stroking your hair while gazing into your eyes allowing you to feel the security of your masters love.  You body cry's for him to take his naughty little girl, throw her against the wall, ripping off your cloths forcefully yet full of passion.  Stretching your hands high over your head, wrapping your legs around his waist then taking you deep and hard.  Chill race though your body as you almost feel him.

Suddenly you hear a sound, afraid to turn your body is tenses yet your imagination runs ramped.  Who could it be, how did they find you, What should I do races though your mind.  The sounds grow closer and closer until you can feel the footsteps behind you.  Frozen with fear, yet for some reason excited at the possibilities.

Then you hear my voice, I say hello to you in a soothing yet firm voice.  Wanting to speak, trying to turn around, yet your body cannot move.  Chills race though out your body, wondering just who I am and what I will do next.  I place my hand on your shoulders, brushing your hair aside and softly kiss your neck and whisper.....  Hello little girl, your master has come for you.  Your body nearly collapses, but you reach down and find the strength to stand.  Wanting to turn around and throw your arms around me, you do not move for master has not told you so. You are an obedient little girl and want to please your master.

I stroke your soft flowing hair as I run my fingers thought it.  Your eyes closed and sigh for you know your master has come for you.  I tell you to turn around so that I can see my little girl and admire her beauty.  As you turn our eyes meet, almost instantly you find yourself lost with in them.  Reaching out to me as to beg me to take you in your arms and hold you never letting go.  I smile as to read your every thought, then reaching out to you, I take you in my arms.

Placing your head against my chest your let yourself go.  So long has it been so you felt so secure, so long has it been since you felt the love of a master.  With your soft little girl voice you whisper, I love you master as you bury your head deep in my chest.  Stoking your hair, I whisper in your ear,  I loves you too, then kissing the top of  your head as to assure her.

To be continued ...


10/25/2005 8:45:35 PM

    Once day our souls will become one

I sit here with thoughts of her as a gentle breeze kisses my shin. The day is cloudy and cool from the nights rain that quenches the thirst of nature. My soul is free from pain and stress that so many have caused. I have only thoughts of the her for she will fill  my desire and needs. My days are filled with loneliness, heartache and questions. She will replaced them with happiness, love and inner peace.  
I stare out the window as the music plays wishing she were in my arms. Wishing I could hold her tightly and never let her go. I long for the day that our eyes meet. I want to look deeply into her eyes and find myself lost with in them without words. Words won't be necessary for our eyes will say all we need to know.
Each day I find that our souls grow closer. What will start off has two souls passing in the night, and  soon will become one. When we talk I find myself lost within you. I am here and your are there yet the distance that separates us fades away. I am with as you are with me even if it is not in a physical sense.
I feel you here with me as I sit here wishing I could touch you. I dream of the day our eyes catch each other, the day my hand glides through your soft hair. The day I look deeply into you eyes and say those three words that capture her heart... I love you..... Then embracing lips telling the other that I am yours. That will be the day that our souls will find peace.
My thoughts are open to her has I hold nothing back. I want to share all I have with her. She will be my life, the air that I breathe, the passion I have searched for all my life. Many years have passed since I have felt the way. But I know, she will make me feel once again. Her love will embraced me, taking my heart and caressing it with kindness. Her words will comfort me and allow me to feel inner peace.

Once day our souls will become one...


 


10/23/2005 12:25:27 AM

Some where in the night she waits for me.

The moon slowly cast its mysterious beam over the tips of the trees that cover the mountain. A gentle warm summer breeze blows through the meadow. Standing here I gaze upon the stars that fill the sky with endless possibilities for wishes. Filled with hopes and dreams I close my eyes and cast my wish upon a falling star.
I stand along on this warm summer night reaching out for my little girl. I've but once, many years ago, felt the love that the great god of love Eros offers to a chosen few.  A love so pure and true never to be questioned by others.  
I stand alone on this warm summer night wishing you were here. I close my eyes and for a moment and you stand beside me. Intoxicated with your beauty, I stand here captive by your spell you have cast on me. I look into your eyes and see a little girl searching for her master. Your words tell me of your desire, your passion and your longing to serve me.
Sliding my fingers through your hair, stroking it softly, I look into your soul and I know you are mine for all your fears, worries and desires are placed with in my hands.  
Some where in the night, standing all alone, is my little girl. She reaches for her master knowing he will protect her, guide and love her.
Come to me my little girl rest your head upon my lap. Close your eyes my little girl and fill your mind with dreams


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