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Male Dominant, 44, Orlando, Jax, Florida
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Female Dominant, 39, Boston, Massachusetts
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Female Dominant, 29, Lincoln, Illinois
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About DominoEffect
Let's see... Me in a nut shell. I have my shit together like any Dom should. I am an experienced play partner. I am sane. I don't send stupid messages. I am a pretty good photographer. I am attractive, but I don't show my face online for career reasons. There is a lot to read here if you want to know more.
Some things about me
Why DominoEffect? When I sat down to create this profile, I was asked to create a name. Obliviously this name was to be different that my real name. I didn’t want something cheesy that didn’t mean anything, so I came up with Domino Effect. It is really suiting for me personally. My life is like a million dominoes out before me. I constantly re-arrange and move the dominoes, ever careful of the trip up that could cause all my domino’s to fall, ergo, the domino e progresses according to my plan with subtle changes along the way. The dominos are re-arranged, but the plan moves on. I have been told I live my life 5 years in the future. Sometimes I agree, other times not so much. Either way, I have a big picture plan that I move toward.
I have an inner self-confidence that comes across as cocky to some people ;) Not sure about that. Some people love it, others hate it. If you ever spend time with me, you will eventually here my mantra-“ I’m not cocky, I’m confident”. I am comfortable with my limits of what I know I can and cannot accomplish. I am educated (bachelors and masters degrees). I have an above average intellect and I respect intelligence in others. I am a challenger by nature and I’m not the type to submit to anyone. I'm not big on protocols. Not that I don't care about them, it's just I am what I am at the moment and if something I want pops in, I do it.
I have a huge heart, but sometimes it does more damage than good. I suffer from mood swings on the extreme. I love intensely, but I can hate just as intensely. I can show empathy and fully understand the emotions in others or I can literally shut out all my emotion in the blink of an eye and become cold. At this point you may be thinking “Oh my god, a dude talking about his emotions….What a pussy?” You might make that assumption, but you’d be wrong ; ) Fuck around with someone I love if you doubt me and watch the sparks if you want to.
Sadist or Sensualist
Just a heads up, I hate the reference to what we do as "Play" or "Scenes". Play is what childeren do. Scenes are what actors do. I am neither. Sorry, mini rant there. I have recently learned that I am not a sadist at heart. In fact, I don't really get off on seeing people in pain. What I do enjoy is giving people new experiences or their old favorites. And if pain is their pleasure, I can deliver because I am very good and being the heartless bastard. But I am very good at being sensual as well.
My favorite tools are my hands. You have to experience it to understand what I mean. I am a very tactile and sensual person, and it shows in my play style. From chills bumps to deep tissue damage and everything in the middle. Most people will underestimate how good I am with my hands until they experience it. (cocky eh :D) I have a huge biting fetish. There is nothing like having someone trapped in my teeth. I love masks and try to build my own when I have time and inspiration. I like electrical play, especially my Violet Wand. My undergrad degree is in electrical engineering, so, yeah I like voltage.
The Quiz
Dominant
100%
Sadist
93%
Experimental
68%
Exhibitionist / Voyeur
64%
Switch
32%
Bondage
29%
Masochist
14%
Degradation Lover
7%
Vanilla
4%
Submissive
0%
What I Look For in a Sub
First- I require someone who has an understanding of Poly relationships. Yes I am married and no my wife does not participate in my activities. (Maybe one day she will, but I am not pushing it.) She knows about everything, she like to meet my partners, and I don’t hide anything from her. She is more than supportive of my activities with my subs and goes out of her way for me to have time with others. She knows I have sex with others and it’s even quite funny to hear the comments she makes about it. In a way, she is more into the idea of us having a poly relationship with a common girl than the idea of BDSM. She really goes above and beyond what I would call reasonable sometimes to let me have relationships with others, and she does indeed get hurt when they end. I mean really, how many wives do you know who would go into the bedroom where their husband’s sub is sleeping, wake her, and put her in bed with her husband before she leaves for work in the morning to make sure her husband has someone to cuddle with. Really. How about a show of hands…… Why do I bring this up first? If you are looking for some type of monogamous relationship where you are the only one in my life, you can quit reading here because I am not the one for you. If the thought of being submissive to a man who is married gives you heartburn, stop. Saying you would not feel comfortable meeting my wife is an immediate red flag for me. I’ve been down this road too many times and it only results in everyone getting hurt when you realize this type of relationship does not work for you.
Second- Drama Free. If you love creating drama, don’t bother. I don’t have room in my life to deal with it. I have managed my life, career, and family very well to get where I am and I need discretion in my life. An ideal sub would add value to my life, not complicate it or damage what I have accomplished. I have enough to deal with, there is no way I would add someone to my life that would cause more issues. Hell, I won’t even play with people that I consider high drama. I just don’t have room for it and the risks are too great.
Third- Consent is important to me. First and foremost, I am a Gentleman first and a Sadistic Dom second. Because of that, I tread very cautiously in new waters when playing with people. If you are the type that requires your Dom to show his “Domlyness” by “taking what he wants” after you said No, it’s not going to work out between us. No and Red are two words that put an immediate stop to whatever I am doing, unless we have agreed otherwise. I have too much to loose by someone bringing charges of assault or rape to my doorstep and it puts me on pins and needles with my interactions. If we agree to some type of consensual non-consent arrangement that is fine, but it will take a bit of time to establish a comfort level of trust for me. Testing the limits, being bratty, or total power exchange are all great things. If you are the type who requires someone to show their “twue dominance over you” against your will, you will probably be shown the door instead. I am not a mind reader and I don’t play that game. See rule number 2 for further reference.
Fourth- I require some type of emotional or mental connection with my subs. I look for a spark or a connection with someone. That spark is one of the things I crave about BDSM. I can usually see that spark within the first 30 minutes of meeting and talking with someone. It does not have to be love and sex is not required, but it has to be something. Playing with someone where I have that connection is completely different from the empty feeling of playing with someone without a connection. I will play with random people as play partners to give them new experiences or to see what kind of connection exists, but I’m don’t enjoy random play without some type of connection that much. I’m very much a sensual sadist, and that connection is my way in. If we don’t have a connection, it is not meant to be, but I will make a great play partner :0)
Fifth- Being my sub does not mean being submissive to everyone. There is such a thing as just being weak. I will be the first to admit, I am not the best at understanding the submissive nature. It is hard for me to even comprehend it or to put myself in that position. I just don’t understand. I can’t even fathom the thought, even though I try sometimes to put myself in other peoples shoes. But here is what I do understand: If you are submissive to everyone, what is special about me? If you lack the ability to stand up for yourself, or are doing things like using me as cover because you can’t say no to someone or constantly calling me with all the things wrong in your life because you won’t stand up for yourself, our relationship is going to fade. (See Rule 2) I understand I like to take charge and make shit happen and I have no problem stepping in when needed, but that should be the exception and not the rule. How can you expect me to see you as a treasure when you see yourself as worthless? It just doesn’t happen.
Sixth- I have my shit together, so should you. I am educated and employed. I am not an addict, an alcoholic, a cheater, or an abuser. I am nothing but honest because I have nothing to hide. If your life is in a wreck, I will do everything in my power to help you get you life back to a sensible routine if that is what you want. I strongly believe, as an individual, that I should do what I can to help others. My life went from nothing to something, and I like helping others do the same. I have no problem giving someone a chance to improve or even helping them improve. With that said, if you like to keep your life in wreck, there is the possibility of dragging my life into a wreck with yours. I can not have that. (See Rule 2)
Seventh- I am looking for someone who actually “enjoys” sensual sadism. I am looking for someone who likes the sensual side of play as well as the sadistic side. I love having someone lay their head in my lap to be petted. I love watching chill bumps run down their arms and back from my fingertips. I enjoy the sound of the female orgasm and like to try and achieve it thru different means. On the other hand, I love pushing a person’s tolerance more. I enjoy being rough, aggressive, and commanding. I have a sharp sadistic side. To me, my sadistic side is a little bit intimate, or maybe romantic. I really cannot find the right word for it. When I am able to get into a person’s head and push them harder, it becomes special. Especially the marks that are left when I am done. If you are just looking for someone to beat your ass, I am not the right choice of Dom for you. Although, I would make a great play partner :0)
Eighth- I am looking for someone with time. My wife and I have worked out our schedule very well and I have a good bit of free time. If you only want to see me for two hours a month to get your “freak on”, you don’t need me, you need a service Top. Some are free, some you have to pay for. I don’t fall in either category. On the flip side, if you never have any free time, when do you expect to see me? I don’t do online relationships.
Ninth- Distance. I don’t do long distance relationships very well. Really, I suck at it. I try very hard, but I fail. I don’t enjoy talking on the phone. Hell, I barely talk to my own family on the phone very often, and I see them about three times a year. I guess I get it from my late grandfather. I don’t enjoy sitting on the phone just to hear you breathe. Most of my day I sit on conference calls, so I get tired of it quickly. That’s not to say I won’t try if that is what you need. If I feel like things are going bad or you need to hear from me more, I will try to adjust my habits if I understand what you need. The responsibility is on you to tell me you need more. I am not a mind reader. The physical limitations of distance really require more communication than I can typically provide under normal circumstances.
Lastly- I do not want total control of your life. I project manage a $500M project where I make decisions all the time that affects people. When I am done with work, I do not want to tell you what you can have for dinner, or what color underwear I want you to have on, or who you can or cannot talk to. If I want something specific, I will make it known. If you need someone to dictate your life to you, it is not me. |
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