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Female Submissive, 34, Sanford, Florida
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Female Dominant, 24, near LA, California
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Male Dominant, 33, Santa Rosa, California
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About CaliLivPup
i am a puppy, a little girl, a slave, a toy, an object, a prized possession, a 12 inch oven (well, okay, that's just my throat). i am NOT a daughter, a Mistress/Domme, or a doormat.
i've learned a lot more about myself from my late-twenties on. i used to think that i was submissive, with S.A.M. tendencies. i now know that there are different levels of slavery, and i fit solidly into the slave/property category.
i'm very open-minded. If i haven't tried it already, i'm generally willing to at least once. If there's something that you enjoy that i haven't listed in my fetish list, just ask. i'm an honest, open person, and i don't hide things.
i've been told that i'm a very good slave. i can be headstrong at times, but i'm very open, loyal, attentive, intelligent, caring, and willing. i love being degraded by the right person. i take things to heart, not only the positive, but also the constructive, and unfortunately, the negative.
i have a slave heart, slave mind, slave instinct, slave soul. This is just something that is natural and ingrained in me. i thrive on praise, both in my vanilla life and this life, but i think most, if not all, submissives and slaves do. i believe that anyone can be submissive, but not everyone can be **A** submissive. Being a submissive or a slave isn't something that can be taught or learned, it's something you're born to be. i know this is controversial, just like some people think that sexual preference is a choice, but this is my belief.
i've seen a lot of people say that submission is a gift. Bullsh*t. Honest to goodness submission isn't a gift, it's a need, ingrained in the s-type, and without it, they're completely lost. Personally, i feel that those who say their submission is a gift need to get their high and mighty stick out of their ass and be glad when they find a wonderful D-type, because there's a lot of crappy ones out there.
my experiences, since i've found the BDSM communities i belong to, have expanded greatly. i have discovered that i'm a slut of MANY things (if you can't be good, be good at it, so i'm good at it, and proud of it).
A slave lives to please their M/M. i’ve always loved the saying “If Momma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy”. i think that applies to a M/s relationship as well, but even more so. Children are meant to grow up and move on. i don’t feel a M/s relationship has the same end result of moving on. A slave has complete and total trust in their M/M, and the M/M has their slave's best interests at heart. Discipline and punishments are meant to make the slave a better slave, just as discipline and punishments are meant to make children better members of society. The worst punishment i've ever had though, is knowing that i've disappointed my D-type. That's worse than any physical punishment could ever be.
my initial thoughts when i first joined the lifestyle, in regards to where i wanted a D/s (at the time, it was D/s) relationship to go used to be “around the bedroom, or the house, occasional trips out, but just for playtime, not for life”. i’ve since rethought that, and i've come to realize that having a total M/s (or O/p) life, not just M/s/O/p for playtime, is for me. i think my strength and independence only serves to enhance my slavery.
i've learned, thanks to some wonderful F/friends, that not only am i an excellent pleasure slave, but i need to be a service slave as well. It's amazing how doing the dishes for Someone you love can give you the warm and fuzzies. Being loved has always been a given need, being wanted has been a need that was realized near my teens. But being needed and appreciated for my skills/talents and what i do, serving Someone, is a need that, when fulfilled, makes my heart soar.
i've also learned that even being a complete submissive, i can keep my identity, and could depend on myself and only myself if needed. Being a slave IS my identity, really.
i'm a passionate person. i throw myself into things whole-heartedly, and in most things, without reservation. This gets me burned. A lot. i'm not going to stop doing that, because to do so would be to pretend to be something i'm not. It will get me who and what i need, eventually. =)
i've knocked down a lot of previous "hard limits" since my late-twenties. i enjoy doing a LOT of things, as you can probably tell by my "into" list. it would be easier to list what are still, and i anticipate shall always be, on my "no" list: corrupting children in ANY way (including swearing around them), scat, involving another human being non-consensually, anything that gets me arrested, anything that would cause harm (no chain saw play, sorry), and not being allowed to watch my 49ers. Yes, seriously. *grins*
RE: spanking as a hard limit... i've been trained that spankings and paddlings are punishment. i hate them. However, i am retrainable, and just as i was trained that those are punishment, i can be trained that they're not. *smiles*
Quotes i like:
"Fly with the Eagles" - Master Ranger, House of Eyrie of the Eagles
"You are not a drop in the ocean. You are the entire ocean in a drop." - Rumi
"It's my pleasure to serve." - eva-lution
"It would also be easy to turn my back on my nature, to believe the things said or silently implied and to isolate myself. But i know who i am and what i need and no loss is great enough to lose ones self over." - elle
"I believe a good sub who has a slave's heart is only a good Master away from becoming a slave. It's just a transition that happens." - Unknown
"M/s is a power-shifted relationship, but it's still a relationship of two people... even if one of them is a table." - BusDriver
"Dominance is not about how to throw a whip... it's about "why" to throw a whip." - _BlackWulf_
"Sexy means accepting who I am today, and working toward being better tomorrow." - perfectly_bound
"Tell me what a man finds sexually attractive and I will tell you his entire philosophy of life. Show me the woman he sleeps with and I will tell you his valuation of himself.... The man who is proudly certain of his own value, will want the highest type of woman he can find, the woman he admires, the strongest, the hardest to conquer--because only the possession of a heroine will give him the sense of an achievement, not the possession of a brainless slut." - Ayn Rand
My Ideal Person: Needing a D-type is relative. my life is full, i have family, Family, friends, school. i'm managing my own life, taking care of the property, if you will, because that is what's needed right now. There is no singular D-type in my life to help me.
However, my life is not complete. i do need a D-type in my life for that. i'm not "looking" for one right now because i've prioritized my needs, and have put the highest priority on school. That's what i need to put the most time into right now.
Please don't mistake needing a D-type for needing, or even wanting, to be micromanaged. i'm quite capable of taking care of myself and my own life.
i need someone to please, someone to serve, someone to learn, and someone who appreciates all that. i want to learn their preferences, their wants, their needs, even their random whims, and do everything i can to fulfill those, even in an anticipatory manner. i want someone whose life i enhance, and who enhances my life.
i want someone that i can trust completely, who knows me better than i know myself, and loves me unconditionally. Someone i can just let go with, and let them take over. Someone who will respect me as a person, and also use and view me as just an , and be able to go back and forth between those without one affecting the other. Someone who understands me. Someone who can provide everything i'm looking for, all in One.
i'm looking for someone dominant, intelligent, tough, loving, fair, and open. i want someone to show me new things, refine the skills i have, and take me to new levels. Someone who loves me, wants me, and needs me. A Daddy, Owner, Master, and Sadist, not a Dominant or Top. And eventually, preferably, a husband.
i'm looking for the Man who will spit on and slap the face of His less-than-human piece of property, and can still slowly and lovingly be with His girl. Someone who will put me on the floor under their desk, or at their feet wherever they are, and rest their feet (preferably in leather boots) solidly on my head, pressing my face down comfortably into the floor with the weight of their feet. mind wanders off to happy places where the smell of leather and Huberd's permeates my nose while the pressure of a solid pair of feet comforts my mind
And a non-smoker. Well, except for the occasional cigar...
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