i post more on FetLife, and am usually on there throughout the day whereas I'm off and on here and go long periods of time not checking this place anymore. Username there is starlightdancer but most photos are set to friends only there. D types and switches there also have to message Sir before messaging me. Same boundary applies, same rule for me to follow. If you don't message him first, you'll just get blocked and deleted.
After a long time away, I'm back. I'm not looking for servitude, I'm not looking for games, I'm looking for connections, for pleasure and for control outside of costumes and props. Hello, boys. x
Journals are easier to edit than profiles. Here we go. I can't put all of what I am looking for here or it gets removed. I write smut and always looking for input.
The potential for growth, the ability to create understanding, apperication of time and effort is greater than a pair of legs opening up and hoping your going to find someone or ones special.
Unfortunately, when I created my profile I forgot to fill out the profile text part. But now that my profile is up and visible, I thought I would add a bit about me and what I’m looking for here in my journal:
Are you a woman who has fantasies about being used by a fat, perverted old man? Do you crave the humiliation and degradation that comes with serving a man you’d be embarrassed to be seen with in public by your family and friends? Do you want to be forced to do all sorts on kinky, nasty things to please a man that everyone thinks you normally wouldn’t let touch you with a ten foot pole?
If you answered YES to these questions, email me and I will be happy to make all of your dark, twisted dreams come true!
Caging a str8 male out of the cuckolding scene is a tricky proposition. I consider myself as a tamer of men and I find this a key part of taming and the most critical. Consider this, a str8 male's identity is built around prnetration, ejaculllation, and the exercise of unrestrined power. This trinity of str8 empowerment must be obliterated and refocused and that is where the cage is my best ally. Taking access to the object of their pride is like castraiting a str8 male, it cuts deep into their psyque and throws their world on a tailspin. A str8 male without a cock to grab is yours for the taking. Any submissive can and will understand your right to cage them period. However for a str8 male is an attempt against their masculinity and their deepest image of themselves. I usually get them used to see the superior man in e and the one who knows. Respect will make easier your demand and the logic of it. For the crowning effect they, not me must put on the restraint and the panic in their eyes can only be equated with the pain of deflowering. Like I like to say, a Bull has reasons that no str8 man will ever understand.
Lately I've been interviewing a sub.At 1st he was the ideal.What I was looking.And then starting being disobedient,rude and don't accept it.I am mentally tired.Tired of being disobeyed,tired of not listened.Tired.Εdit:that sub got blocked.that's what you get when you test My patience.
I am confused. I am heartbroken. Was I intentionally targeted to be catfished, led on, or simply just for someone to be cruel to?
I'm not perfect. I put my heart 100% in what I say and do here. I willl always be honest, and now I'm afraid, I may have been transparent to a fault. *sigh* The worst part is I don't know what happened.
Why is it so hard to find someone who's just as honestly trying to live this lifestyle?
Dominants are human, and our hearts break sometimes, too. It hurts too much to get to the point of caring, and then...nothing. Not even an explanation.
Since we have been getting questions - Locktober for the slave is just another month. It is in chastity year round. The time of the year does not matter. With that said, the slave earned a pet tag on its cock cage and a QR code for back of its Latowski this Locktober. The QR code contains its info on slavereg.com
As a submissive sissy, I get that question frequently. The answer is as fluid as the journey I am on.
I see my kinks as a living breathing thing that demands exploration, particularly in my embrace of submission and the desire to fully experience that dynamic. My kinks are centered around the power exchange, especially as I continue to learn what it means to be submissive to a dominant man. It’s about finding the balance between trust, vulnerability, and allowing myself to be fully immersed in the role of servitude. I also have a fetish for the feminization process, loving the way it brings out my true self and helps me feel more aligned with the woman I am becoming.
In essence, my kinks and fetishes reflect the ongoing discovery of who I truly am after so many years of pretending, and each step I take deepens that understanding.
Sometimes being submissive isn't about living a lifestyle but rather being able to be vulnerable to someone you trust. To let them take control of you and what happens to you, even your life, for a little while.
Life has happened so hard, the biggest loss we all have to deal with at some point really take the wind out of your sails. not sure if I'm coming or going but I know life has to go on, it's just that much harder. I like to talk to some friends I do have on here, but I'm not in the right mind set to entertain anything with anyone. Time heals all wounds. I just need time.
"It is often safer to be in chains than to be free !" - Franz Kafka
This sums it all up - at least for me !!
I seek the comfort and safety of submitting - being led, having to adapt and be molded and kept in mental bondage reinforcing my servile demeanor.
The term Mental Bondage may involve many different techniques on different practical and mental levels, from suble influencing to intense pressure, also physical torturelike softening of the submissive to make it receptive and accept the Ds process it is consensually exposed to. Combined with hypnotic techniques with invading forced listening via earbuds to Your voice with hypnotic soothing repeating mesmerizing messages.
I am very interested in comments with info when such practices systematically are used for real over time. I have not yet been exposed to such treatment on a long term permanent basis locking me into the process without possibility to leave, but the idea intensely excites me. I want to learn and feel real pressure to comply - starting the process consensually, and then at some point - no way out .....
I'm talking 'bout my generation Talking 'bout that newer nation And if you don't like it You can beat it Beat it, baby You never liked the way I said it If you don't get it, then forget it So I don't have to fucking explain it Cause I'm a Brooklyn baby I'm a Brooklyn baby
It's like those lyrics carry a sense of identity and weight, even when they seem light. The repetition, "I'm a Brooklyn baby," feels like a declaration of something deeper—a feeling of being rooted in something bigger, but also carrying that vulnerability and pain underneath. Almost like saying, "I'm here, but there's so much more behind the surface."
It’s not just about the words, but the weight of feeling like you’ve had to fight and scream to be heard, and still... nothing. It can feel exhausting when no one’s really listening, when the energy you put out feels like it just vanishes into a void. That emptiness that comes after all the effort, when you’ve given everything and are still left feeling alone—that’s heavy. It’s like a wall of silence that doesn’t break, no matter how loud you scream or how much you pour out.
They think I don't understand The freedom land of the seventies I think I'm too cool to know ya You say I'm like the ice I freeze
That line hits hard—it’s like there’s this gap between what others think and what you really feel, and the way it creates this distance. It’s a powerful reflection of feeling misunderstood, and at the same time, being guarded, like ice. There’s so much in that feeling of being cool on the outside, but maybe there’s a lot more going on underneath.
Ultraviolence captures that raw, unrelenting pain—the kind that cuts deep and leaves scars you can’t always see. It’s not just about physical violence, but the emotional and mental toll of trying to survive in a world that feels indifferent or even hostile. It’s the weight of love, loss, rejection, and fighting for something real when everything feels brutal and unkind. The way Lana weaves those emotions into her music makes it all the more visceral. It’s like she’s singing about the violence of being misunderstood, of giving and not receiving, of being trapped in cycles of intensity that don’t let up.
the Pa-da-da-da-da-da part in Brooklyn Baby feels simple on the surface, just vocalizations, but it carries weight because of the emotion behind Lana’s voice and the layered harmonies. It’s like she's using the sounds to evoke a feeling beyond words—a mixture of nostalgia, detachment, and maybe even resignation.
By that point in the song, she’s moved away from literal meaning and is communicating more through the feeling of the music itself. The backing vocals, especially with the men joining in, create a sense of collective disillusionment, like they're all echoing her sentiment, but with a touch of irony. The softness contrasts the rebellious attitude of the lyrics, making it feel like a bittersweet, almost resigned anthem.
It’s like she’s saying, This is just how things are, but underneath it, there's a longing for something deeper, something more real. The repetition and the flow of the sounds express that emotional state in a way that words alone might not be able to. It adds to the song’s atmosphere, giving a voice to the unspoken frustrations and complexities of being misunderstood, trapped in surface-level expectations.
I get down to Beat poetry And my jazz collection's rare I can play most anything
this isn't a flex...it's saying how talented she is but no one notices or cares.....she's very skilled in things no one cares about and that doesn't change life's circumstances. that only a niche of a niche of a niche cares about..but she knows she's so talented that she rattles it because she knows people in the know recognize it. it's a acknowledgement of what she's worked hard to craft while also recognizing it's nothing
That line isn’t a flex at all, it’s more of a statement wrapped in irony. Lana is acknowledging her talents—her deep connection to niche things like beat poetry, jazz, and her rare collection. She’s spent time and effort honing these skills, cultivating a refined taste, and mastering things that matter deeply to her, but in the grander scheme, it’s like no one notices or cares. It’s a bittersweet realization of her own uniqueness and skill, but also the futility of it.
She’s proud, but it’s not enough to change her circumstances or how the world perceives her. It’s like saying, Yeah, I can do all these things, but what does it matter? It’s a reflection of how being talented or special doesn’t necessarily lead to recognition or fulfillment. She knows only a tiny niche of people might care about these things, but for the rest of the world, it means nothing. It’s like the ultimate what’s the point? moment wrapped in a subtle acknowledgment of her own brilliance.
You say I'm too dumb to see They judge me like a picture book By the colors, like they forgot to read I think we're like fire and water I think we're like the wind and sea You're burning up, I'm cooling down You're up, I'm down You're blind, I see
Those lyrics capture such a deep feeling of being misunderstood, like you’re moving in opposing rhythms, but still bound together in some way. It’s frustrating, isn’t it? People see what’s on the surface, but they miss the essence, the complexities inside. The contrast between fire and water, wind and sea—it’s such a vivid way to describe the intensity of that connection. One burns while the other cools down, like two forces pulling in different directions but still coexisting, still interacting. It feels like being in two worlds at once, and yet no one quite gets it.
The way she says "Brooklyn baby" at the end—definitively, yet almost resigned—carries so much weight. When the guys join in with the elongated bayyyyy beee, it shifts the whole tone. It’s no longer just her own voice; it’s echoed, but in a way that feels detached, like they’re chiming in on her identity without truly understanding it. It feels like a loss of personal ownership, like the identity she was so sure of—I’m a Brooklyn baby—is now something distant, fading, not fully hers anymore.
And that pah da de da de dah dah that follows is like her way of giving up, like a lullaby of surrender, a little girl’s soft collapse. It’s not a defiant statement anymore; it’s more of a quiet, melancholic folding into herself. It’s like the final exhale after fighting, acknowledging that maybe she’s been fighting for something that no one truly sees or cares about. Little girl Lana down, as you said. That’s when the song truly hits its emotional depth—when she stops fighting, and the weight of everything she’s been carrying just sinks into the background.
Thank you for reaching out! While many messages have been opened, read, some profiles or journals clicked too, not all.
In time, i do hope to reply to each note filtered to my inbox, however it may take quite some time. Thank you for your patience. If you'd like to stand out, feel free to share your current kinks and fetishes, and why we might be a fit.
*This seems so impersonal however, the rude notes bc you haven't gotten a reply... may be self fulfilling prophecies??*. For now, inbox filters will be set to SWM 40s-50s.
Safewords are tools, not weaknesses or failures. You wouldn’t feel guilty for using a wrench or a hammer, so why feel guilty for using a safeword?
Subs and masochists can violate consent as well as dominants can. Nonconsensual bratting might feel cute, but it still requires enthusiastic consent. Not all tops are brat tamers.
No matter how hot you think you look in your svelte La Perla, exhibitionism also requires enthusiastic consent.
Never ever be a good sub to a bad dominant. It will destroy you.
Meeting a “vanilla” acquaintance at a kink event is like making a new friend. Will it be mortifying at first? Hells yes, but give it a minute. It might even turn a casual acquaintance into a best friend…
… Unless that vanilla acquaintance is your mother, obviously. Or your therapist. But go to events anyway. Some risks are worth taking. Nike-Swish-just-do-it.
Getting a reference from someone's friend or current play partner is like asking Donald Trump what he thinks of Donald Trump. Find your own references. Get the references of your references (unless you think they’re eating the dogs because sure they are.
Nobody speaks about consent as convincingly as a particular breed of predator.
Event hosts are just people who have the resources to host. Their parties aren’t a sign of successful vetting or leadership. The kink scene will treat them as leaders, but that doesn’t make it so.
Those RACK risks you're so sure will never materialize will materialize, so put your "it won't happen to me" trope in the trash with your false sense of security.
Play parties don't look like a scene in Eyes Wide Shut. Mainly, we just sit around singing Muppets songs while Jackson does rope in Spanx.
Intentionally exposing yourself to trauma in a scene without your dominant's consent is a violation.
Kitchen implements are perfectly legitimate toys, and fuck anyone who says otherwise. When someone ignores your small boundaries, they will move on to "greater” things.
Consent violations can stack up in secret for years. Just because someone’s been around the community since 1804, doesn’t mean they're trustworthy.
When someone measures your submission and finds it wanting, it’s often because their dominance is wanting.
Playing within the BDSM community is safer. Safer is not a synonym for safe.
BDSM doesn’t have to be dark or serious. Be who you seem to be, even if that entails lightness and laughter. Kink is not a religion or a professional undertaking. It’s supposed to be fun. Just do you. Be you. Love you.
Really dislike this sites edit profile lay out. NO idea how to change primary photos... and every time you wanna delete one, you can apparently only do one at a time, and have to go through squinting to figure out the stupid verification string every time. UGH my nerves.
i no longer have the little cavalier... having to start over with a new pup, a golden. So those photos are the more recent ones.
If anyone is a video game player, and role-plays in ESO, hit me up! i run a heavy RPG guild there.
