Getting to know shinypet

While I generally emit a presence of submissiveness, there are times where my inner domme comes out to play and it typically revolves around my hypnosis fetish. Well, as of late, I have been thinking of exploring my dominant side and in this endeavor, I have been chatting with a latex enthusiast online. I will simply refer to him as shinypet.

I arrived at the Hurricane before him by about 15 minutes or so. I decided I would make myself easy to spot and wore the purple wig for the evening in combination with a burned out velvet tunic, black rayon skirt, and black leather under bust corset. Let's not forget the black and shiny, knee high boots with the 5" heels. Yes, I was going for a look. I think the look worked as shinypet arrived and spotted me sitting in the booth waiting for him.

I could tell right away that shiny pet was both excited and a little nervous to be there. He came to the booth and waited for me to extend an invitation for him to sit down. That was indeed a good start. We talked about what he was looking for, what his hard limits were, what his familiarity with safe words were, in particular the green-yellow-red-blue system that Mistress and I use. Most people quicky get what the first three colors represent, and blue has a special significance around emotional land mines, those moments where a bottom, or even a top, get into a bad headspace for whatever reason. Scene stops and immediately proceeds to after care. shinypet caught the value of the system and relayed an instance where having a safeword for emotional land mines would've conveyed the current state of affairs much more effectively.

I noticed that shinypet is a very animated speaker; his hands were in constant motion as her spoke, punctuating his words in visual manner. I told him to put his hands on the table; palms down and not to move his fingers while he spoke. That alone changed the tone of the conversation, if ever so slightly. Looking at shinypet, he sat a little straighter on the bench, he used honorifics much more frequently, etc. Only once did hands deviate from being straight out before him.

We talked about each other's current relationship dance card, what is going on with his girlfriend. I spoke to my relationship with Mistress, the rules I have to play by, the fact that I work at an internet company, have a photography studio, family and children, and a dominant that I play with as well.

Over all, I have a good feeling about last night's meeting. Should this work out, I will have to say that my dance card is full for the time being.

An update in the life of amber. :)

Something I have been thinking about for almost a year is going to happen! I am taking American Tribal Style Belly Dance lessons! I am so excited about this!

I'll likely be posting about this again after the first class in three weeks.

I can't wait! I can't wait! I can't wait!

Oh goddess, I needed that!

I didn’t dance at all, namely because my back was healing and I didn’t wish to aggravate it further. So I satisfied my voyeuristic tendencies by watching some flogging and other sensation play, suspension technique, a couple of gay men that we very pleasing to watch, and even the dancers were, as always, a pleasure unto themselves.

About 10:30 or so, a fairly cute African-American struck up a conversation with me. We must have chatted for felt like an hour, feeling each other out. Normally, he’s not able to go to the Wet Spot on Thursdays due to work, but the 4th of July holiday was working in his favor. He was a bottom looking to try the other end. Mostly vanilla in his experience, he wanted to try giving someone a spanking. Not the kinkiest of propositions, but I am more than willing to let him try and give him feedback on his technique.

The first thing I pointed out to him was that dress helps define attitude and atmosphere. Granted a dominant can dress how ever the hell he or she likes, but generally something helps define the space and moment in time. Perhaps the only part of his clothes that even remotely took me out of the moment was his t-shirt with the Punisher skull on it. Though, he did have black, leather gloves on and I have a huge glove fetish. I should also mention that he was virtually hairless on his body; soft and silky smooth.

Even if his hits were on the light side, he showed promise as he would tease and then follow up with the sting of his hand. Sadly, he removed his gloves to do it. It was more notes for him.

A note for me, though, is that I need to work on how to put a condom on someone is a truly sexy manner because that was not it on Thursday night. In fact, it was almost down right clumsy. I explained the “don’t bring home anything you can’t get rid” rule to him and his response, I kid you knot, was, “Oh, that’s why the condom.” No, it’s because I don’t want any unforeseen gifts!

The interesting thing for the night was that after I was as I was getting fucked was the sensation of feeling like I was about to have a male climax with every thrust. Thinking about it in hind sight, my theory is that the shaft was putting pressure on the prostrate gland. It was a total tease! “Oh, I’m about to cum! Yes! Yes! I’m going to--hey! That’s not fair! I want to cum! Oh, I’m about to cum! Yes! Yes...” Yes, it was a complete tease.

As a reminder to myself, I need to make an appointment for an STD scan as my last one was roughly 6 months ago. It’s that whole proactive thing...

Off to the Wet Spot tomorrow...

I am going with a friend to simply go dancing. Should be a grand time. Of course if someone were to grab me by the hair while there...that could be a fun opening too. ;)

I am happy with what I accomplished last night...

What accomplishment might that be? It is the fact that I was on the dance floor more than half the time I was there. :) It was fun to simply hang out with R and D was a joy to watch, though the punk left without saying goodbye. Punk. ;)

I am tired and pleasantly sore today. I had several compliments on the PVC and the corset, followed by more questions about whether or not I was dying in it. :) I was drinking lots of water last night and was probably losing it just as fast.

Yes, I'm happy overall with how last night went. I should go dancing more often.

The plan for this evening is that I am going to the Center for Sex Positive Culture (a.k.a. the Wet Spot) to go dancing this evening.

Anyone in or near the Seattle area at the time of the Grind is welcome to join me.

Yes, I'm a bad frame of mind at the moment. Anyone care to help cheer me up? I have an appointment from 8 to 9 this evening, but afterwards...

Evening spent downtown...

I went and shot photos for Tonya Winter's 10th Anniversary Show for FetishWear.net down at Club Heaven, formerly known as the Catwalk. It also gave me an opportunity to don the latex again for the evening, which is always an enjoyable thing.

I shot over 360 photos as I was deleting ones that were obviously bad during the show. Space was at a premium because I left one of my compact flash cards at home in the reader. In the process of the evening, I maxed both cards. Sigh.

Almost every one there was dressed to the nines. The finery, both on stage and in the audience was to die for. On stage, we had Tonya's work in latex, PVC, stretch mesh and utterly fabulous makeup. In the audience, we had more latex and PVC, silks and satins, leather and fishnets, collars and chains.

There were also those that were in their mundane clothes, such as what looked to be a father and son pair that came from Safeco Field thinking that it was some kind of strip bar. Of course, when the burlesque intermission show started, that may changed things for them a bit. The older of the two, I think, was hitting on me. Well, maybe not, but I like to believe I'm hot every once in a while. ;) In any case, he was asking me about the photography I was doing, how it compared to related disciplines, such as cinematography, and so on. He was very sweet, if a little a drunk.

At the other end of the spectrum was a woman who caught my eye. Certainly, the thigh high boots with the 6" spike heels that laced up the front were most impressive--yes, I love boots--but were not it. The tight PVC, black and red corset was particularly sexy. More over, the opera length, black PVC gloves were eye grabbing as well, but that wasn't what grabbed my attention either.

You see, on night like this, those items are commonplace. Don't get me wrong, I love seeing and wearing items just like those. No, this time it was fetish of mine that rarely gets played with these days. She was wearing the largest strap-on that I have ever seen someone wear. Yes, I've seen bigger, but not actually on someone. Even now, just writing about, my heart is racing and the arousal meter is climbing. I have few pictures of her too, as if I could resist taking those photos.

The work that Tonya put into the show was simply amazing. The looks she created were impressive and all incredibly sexy. As it turns out, one of the models and I have worked together in past back at Microsoft. In the past when we have run into each other on the street, she would generally be the first to notice me and we would chat. I don't know if she recognized me last night or not, but I would love to hear her reaction if she did.

There was one outfit that would love to have if I could myself into shape enough for it. It's a black and purple combo with a dress and a jacket. I haven't gotten to it yet in the photo set, but I'll be sure to post it when I do.

A very good Sunday...

On Sunday, I spent the early afternoon with the lovely Miss Jenny Rotten of the Nasty Habits. You see, I want to get into erotic photography, but I need volunteers to help suffer through my learning curve. Miss Jenny was an eager and helpful volunteer.

My goal in this endeavor is two fold. The first is that I want to establish a body of work under my feminine persona. Second, I want to submit work to the Seattle Erotic Arts Fetival in 2009. To do that, I need to have a body of work that I feel comfortable with and excited about at the same time.

There were times during the shoot that I found myself shooting in a more portrait style and I had to remind myself that it was not what I was going for. Now that I have finished up with a clients set of photos, I can start looking at Jenny's photos and see what I got from that.

That evening I went to the Wetspot to play with the Countess again for the Thousand and One Nights, partner play party with a focus on service. With the partner parties, you have to have a date to get in the door. What they did to the place was simply fabulous. Silks hung from the ceiling. A dining area with small tables was set up on the dance floor. Throw pillows scattered about. Middle Eastern inspired music played softly that set the tone of the evening.

My outfit was comprised of a gold bra and panties set, the purple iridescent skirt, and the stretch mesh shirt. I wore my purple silk, beaded wrap, and my ankle bells and head dress, carefully pulling my hair through it.

When the Countess arrived, I joined Her at one of the tables where I fed Her beef and lamb meatballs, dipped in a marvelous garlic sauce, and grapes. It was very enjoyable feeding Her like that. We chatted and talked, enjoying the company. Next came the time for playing on the lattice frame.

The lattice frame, and I'm probably not using the correct term here, is made of up of vertical and horizontal bars that form a grid. She handcuffed me to the lattice with my arms slightly raised.She shackled my meet together, keeping the locks of the cuffs facing the same direction and effectively shortening my chain and limiting what I could do with my feet. Being a bondage lover, I was in heaven. And the beatings began in earnest.

This time around, She decided to the step up the next level where things got a bit rougher, and by "a bit", I mean a lot. I did have to pause the scene as I was losing the feeling in my hands because of the cuffs were a little too tight. I was given a towel to hold onto instead, acting as my pseudo handcuffs. At one point, I had a lot of hair in my face and I let go of the towel for a brief moment to remove the hair and almost did so. Then I remembered that the towel was my handcuffs and quickly put my hand back.

The flogging, beating, and whipping was way more intense that the previous session. A few new toys were introduced, including a short single-tail and a leather strap. In fact, the intensity of the play increased enough to cause me to call out "yellow" twice during the evening. It was very intense and I have the marks to prove it.

In reference to those marks, it was predicted by the Countess, Mistress, and myself, that I would be feeling this on Monday. Well, I was sore on Monday, but not in a way I think any of expected. You see, it was the tops of my inner thighs that were sore and not the same way that an impact can leave you sore. No, this was more of a deep muscle ache kind-of sore. It was almost as if I had been exercising those muscles in some new way.

My working theory on this right now is that in girl mode, I tend to keep my knees together more than in boy-drag. It seems to me that simple act uses those inner thigh muscles. I wonder if I can use that my advantage in dealing with inner thigh fat?

Back to the marks, while I still have some pretty impressive welts, especially on my backside, as far as actual bruises go, I only have a couple of my calves. I was certain I would have more. Still, I am awed over these mark's sister effect of release.

Again, another good night in all. Thank you, Ma'am, I enjoyed it thoroughly.

Last night was an opportunity to make a connection...

And I took that opportunity instead of heading to game. Over all, the night was incredible. It started with an a message from the Countess Circe that an opportunity to meet yesterday evening had suddenly opened up. So I made sure I had Mistress' permission before I saying I was definitely going.

Since I have the breast form tape, I was able to wear one of my PVC dresses that has been unavailable in the past because its strapless and my distinct lack of a strapless bra. However, with the forms in place and that I was wearing them with my breast form tape, it seemed to be the perfect outfit to wear.

So the outfit was pretty simple: Black fishnet stockings and top, the strapless, black PVC evening gown and my boots. I was torn about whether to wear the red wig or the purple one and went with the purple one. Fortunately, this made it easier for the Countess Circe to recognize me. Of course, I wore my 6", knee high black books. I ran into some "nail malfunctions", but Mistress was able to help me get that taken care of.

I arrived at the CSPC (aka the Wetspot) to meet Her there. When I arrived, the Countess  Circe was speaking with a lovely lady wearing a full body, zentai suit about that suit and where she purchased it. The answer to that question was ebay.com and that it was dirt cheap in the grand scheme of things. By dirt cheap, I mean less than $10 a suit and it has been piquing my encasement fetish something fierce. However, that is not the focus of this entry.

The Countess and I chatted for probably the better part of two hours on the futon-couch, sitting in front a St. Andrew's Cross, just feeling each other out, what commonalities we shared, where we differed. We talked about rules and hard limits—the usual list applies here about scat, blood, animals, things that would get someone thrown in jail—and we about things that we liked in scenes. It was, in my mind, a good and healthy discussion. During this time, I was able to demonstrate my basic services skills, of fetching soda for Her and opening.

I also demonstrated my ability to fall on face and recover in the cat like manner of "I meant to do that." During our conversations, we were seated on a futon couch with a metal frame and I was sitting at an angle, facing Her. During this time, I managed to put my left ankle to sleep, so it immediately crumpled on me when I went to stand. I think "ow" was the operative word as I fell and caught myself, landing very much on my feet.

When She asked me if I wanted to play, I answered with a completely awkward, non-answer of which I cannot remember specific details at the moment. Though I caught myself and apologized. With that, we went to the coat rack and I assisted Her in the donning of Her jacket and then headed to Her car where I fetched Her bag of play toys like a good submissive.

When we reentered the building, I helped Her with jacket and carried the bag to the couch. The first thing I pulled out for Her was Her Edwardian corset. The corset was constructed of a heavy cotton coutil from the looks of with white lace around the top. From the brief time I spent looking at it, it appeared to be fairly well constructed, though laced in a fashion that I felt was not the best way to do it, which was similar to the way that one would lace a shoe. Though we worked with what we had and I endeavored to make the best of it, keeping the lacing as parallel as possible and lacing Her in tight as was comfortable.

We talked some more, waiting for some equipment to free up and when it did, it was my job to go lay the claim as it were. Once the equipment was acquired, I went back took the bag from the Countess Circe. I was instructed to remove my PVC dress and stand in front of the St. Andrew's Cross, presenting myself for inspection and flogging.

As per our conversation, She began slowly and worked Her flogging up there. She quickly found Her rhythm and I found mine. Interestingly enough, I found myself entering into that mental cloud of subspace quickly. I don't know if it was that I had a lot of pent up need for this kind of release or that She was that good. It was most likely a combination of the two, though it doesn't really matter as I was in heaven. The rhythm of the beatings, my moans and screams, the beats of the music; we were all one at that time and my inhibitions were gone. I was dancing while being beaten, which being as self-conscious about my body movements as I am, should tell you just how good it all was.

Over all, She had four or five floggers of varying weight, a wooden kitchen spoon, a butterfly swatter (I have no idea if that is what it is truly called, but I am amused by my name for it!), a pair of old sandals, a pair of ping pong paddles, and painter's stick with Christmas decorations and the phrase "Seasons Beatings" on it. There may have been more items, but I cannot recall any at this time. All I have to say is that She was very competent with all of them and handled them well.

As things progressed, the whippings became harder, the caresses that much softer and more tender, and the energy just sizzled. To be honest, She hit me in places I do not recall ever having been flogged on before, notably the outer and inner thighs and my calves. I have never really appreciated just how little fat I have on my lower legs; they are stringy, thick muscles. And they were hurting like the dickens! Oh. My. Goddess. That was some intense pain. At some point on the cross, I realized that I was hyperventilating as the world was going grey and it was time go even deeper and find that rhythmic deep breathing.

She flogged me above and below my breasts (much appreciated as I am not sure how much abuse my forms could actually take), wrapping the tails around my chest, feeling their sting. At one point, She was alternating between my upper back and my crotch. Let me tell you, the pain was blinding and my whole world became focused on those six square inches of surface area.

There was one particular blow to the top of my back on my spine that literally knocked the wind out of me sent me forward. This was probably the closest I came to using a safe word* all night long, mind you it would have been "yellow", not "red". As a submissive, I have a horrible, horrible habit of not using safe words. I push myself further and further to the point of going over the edge. At that point, it's too late. In the almost 20 years that I have been exploring, I have used the "red" safe word maybe four times and the "yellow" safe word less than that. Yes, I know, "Bad sub! No biscuit!"

Of course, in hind sight, it may not have been so easy to be heard over the music and the sounds of others having their own fun. Remember, I am standing against the cross with my back to Her and She is a good five feet behind me when you consider the swinging distance of the flogger. I have an idea, which is inspired by something that P, an acquaintance I have know from the convention scene and from the Wetspot, suggested for situations where the submissive is gagged or otherwise unable to talk. This suggestion is to hold a pair of double d-clips in your hand and drop them if you need attention as a safe word substitute. While the auditory component of the clips falling to the floor might be lost in the din, there is still the visual aspect.

She brought the scene to an end after what felt like hours to me, which I know, rationally it wasn't hours, as it is better to terminate a scene too soon than too late. The endorphins were running and the adrenaline was pumping. She asked if I was up to helping with clean and I said, "Yes, Ma'am." I put the linen, which was on the floor, into the dirty laundry and I sprayed down the equipment with cleaner and wiped it down. From there, I went to the After Care** room where I made the bed and laid down for a spell. She brought some water and fruit and we talked about how things went, what went well and what didn't.

We cleaned up the After Care room and reset it back it default state of the unmade bed and pillows. From there, we found a laid out futon in the social area*** where we could simply pile on and talk and cuddle and kiss. It was good a way to come down off the high of the scene. Of course, it occurred to me that I could sleep there and that probably was not the best idea. About one o'clock in the morning, we parted ways, as we thought Mistress would not like the idea of me accidently falling asleep behind the wheel.

Over all, it was a very good evening and a spectacular first date. I look forward to playing with the lovely Countess Circe again.

* Safe words, for those that are unfamiliar with the term, is a means to communicate outside of the scene how a submissive, or even a dominant, can communicate how they are doing in a clear manner that will not be confused with what is going on in the scene. For example, in some scenes, like a rape or interrogation scene, saying, "No," really means "yes". Safe words that are clearly not in the scope of the scene avoid this confusion. If the submissive suddenly says, "red," you know there is a problem. I tend to ascribe to the four-color system of safe words: green, yellow, red, and blue. Using the traffic light analogy, the first three are easy to understand; keep going, slow down, and stop the scene. Blue is also a stop word, but it gives the context that person has hit an unforeseen emotional landmine and immediate care and feeding of that person must happen to restore them to a good mental state.

** The After Care room at the Wet Spot is a small room with a twin size bed, a full sized futon, and pillows. Clean sheets and pillowcases are left on the bed for use in the room. The idea is that since these scenes can be very, very intense for the submissive, the After Care room is a quieter place where the submissive can come down off their high.

*** The Social Area is just that, an area with the drinks like soda, coffee, and water and of there are snacks like fruit and candy. More importantly, there are tables, chairs, and a lounge, among other things. Generally speaking, play does not happen in the social area.

The Norwescon Recap

Lets face it, I was busy. Between my usual duties of running the I.T. department, shooting a play on Thursday night, running the LARP on Friday night, it was a packed weekend in the extreme. Sadly, I was not able to participate in the chocolate auction* this year as it was on Friday and I was entertaining people. ;) However, I finally was able to meet Tori, a recently released girl and she was quite the babe. Alas, while running the LARP, I had to be professional and not hit on the players. Though, I would have oppurtunies later.

Oh, but several good things happened to me during the convention that I absolutely enjoyed. The first was my new corset, a blue iridescent denim under bust with white detailing. Of course, now I have to accessorize to go with it. Oh, the horrors of beauty. :) Saturday evening I was decked out in my black and purple latex** and flaunting my red hair for the IBT Slave Auction***. For the second time, I assisted Mistress Zoey, the Slave Pit Mistress, in duties of organizing and instructing the slaves. My associate in the pit who also helped Mistress Zoey was Nez, who was just a doll, like Mistress Zoey.

One of said slaves was an uncomfortable looking young man in bobby socks, cross trainers, a plaid mini skirt, a tank top that was slit down the front and safety pinned together, and black thong. And when I threw innuendos at him by suggestively reading the IBT Live Action Role Playing agreement at him ("Under no circumstances are you to engage in any sexual activity while on the clock for IBT, and honey, with you, even a kiss on those lips would be highly sexual!"), he would blush a beautiful shade pink. I even went so far as to tell him so. I don't know if he was straight or not, but he was certainly acting like it. Even so, he was a wonderful subject to accept my humiliations.

The first thing I should note is that I learned of the perils of too much K-Y when putting on latex stockings. Interestingly enough, there is this ratcheting effect that was happening as I was walking; the latex stocking was getting tighter and tighter with each step around my toes. The latex would get so tight as to be painful. Due to the lovely effects of a vacuum, peeling the rubber off of the toes took some work.

But one of the high lights of the evening showed itself. One of the slaves, a young lad who had picked up the moniker "Mormon Boy". He was exceptionally submissive and service oriented. So when I told him to kneel before me, he quickly complied. When I corrected him that he should say, "Yes, Ma'am," instead of a simple "yes", he took to that quickly as well. Oh, such a fine young man who sold for much less than he should have. I should check up with the IBT folks and find out how much is in my account at this point. I figure I should have around 600,000 timbucks, maybe more.

There is the possibility that we may make it down to Orycon this year if the folks from Xcentricities wish to have Mistress work their booth for them. Of course, this is really premature and subject to change. However, that would be an opportunity for me to earn more timbucks if IBT makes it there too. Regardless of Orycon, I will go to RustyCon again and will work the pit again if they will have me. Of course, I don't see any reason why they would not, but you never know. In any case, if my math is right, that should put me near 1,000,000 timbucks by Norwescon. If that is the case and Mormon Boy is in the auction again, I will make sure he's valued properly, if you get my meaning. What amuses me the most about this is that I found out who his parents are. No, I'm telling as I don't want to get him in trouble if they don't know about it, because he enjoyed himself.  Yes, he would make some domme a very nice pet indeed.

When I went out to be auctioned off, I made sure to strut my stuff. I wiggled my rear and my shook my boobs. People at it up. I especially played to the folks in the front row and those who had beads. You see, there was a contest going for who had the most beads****. My approached worked well for me, which was to put my head in their lap. :)  I managed four strands out of it and that made me happy enough. After being flogged by the Mistress of the Whip, an actual pro-domme as far as I am aware, I heard the final sale figure of 350,000 timbucks for me. However, there was some paper mix-up and I do not all of the details, but the cost was reduced to 250,000 and I ended up going to a lady named Passion. Simply, I followed Her to help Her get a few things She needed and then headed back to the IBT room. We talked and cuddled on the couch, but it became clear She was exhausted. Her husband had also been in the room and I suggested to Him and Her that She should get some sleep and they both agreed.

I spent another hour chatting with Nez and others, getting to know the IBT folks better. While walking back to the room, my left stocking ripped around the toes. *sigh* I will have to get that fixed. A tire repair kit comes to mind, and I figure what's the worst that could happen? I damage the stocking more than it already is?

On my way back, I received a call from Tori's other half asking me to meet them in the tower. Once there, I met them on the third floor, and a gal name Lynne was with them. As it turned out, I had seen Lynn on Alt previously. Yes, it was a small world. We all posed for photos and had some good times before I went back to my room, peeled out of my latex, washed it by hand, and then took a shower.

Over all, it was a delightful weekend with many found memories.

* A chocolate auction is bidders buy chocolate for $1 per piece or $40 for a tin of roughly 40 pieces. A bidder then can either eat their chocolate or place a bid of chocolate on an entertainer for the evening. Local, state, and federal laws apply. Remember, boys and girls, this is for fun after all.

** While the latex was enough to hold my forms in place, I tried using my breastform tape just to make sure. Yes, they were in place all night long until I took them off at 2am.

*** The Intergalactic Bank of Timbucktu runs their slave auction as a live action roleplaying event and uses a fictional currency called Timbucks. Timbucks can be earned through gathering up slaves and selling them to the bank for sale. A slave could even sell him or herself to the bank for Timbuck. A slave that is sold on the block gains 1/3 of their sale price to their account. Timbucks can also be gained by giving things to the bank that they need to put on an event. For example, 20 more 12 oz cup could net you 500 timbucks per cup. Energy drinks could net you up to 10,000 timbucks.

**** The winning slave was in a yellow and green Rogue costume from the X-Men comic books. She took 24 strands of beads.

Care to go dancing?

So, the Center for Sex Positive Culture, formerly known as the Wet Spot, has new event that I just noticed on Wednesdays. It's a weekly dance styled event called "The Hump!" and each week is a different theme. For example, this week's theme is Funk & Soul, on the 14th is Ballroom Dancing and Swing, followed by Belly Dancing and Erotic on the 20th, and Country and Western on the 27th.

Two of those interest me right out of the gate; Ballroom Dancing and Swing and Belly Dancing and Erotic, with the Belly Dancing and Erotic winning out between those two. Sadly, the person I was going to go with has had to cancel due to work constraints between her and her partner, which is totally understandable.

This leads me to my general call to see who is interested in going with me? I should warn you that the sum of my belly dancing experience is one workshop at Rustycon 24. While I did not show any innate aptitude for the dance, and some might argue that I lack any aptitude for dancing as a whole, I had fun doing it and have been thinking about exploring it some more.

The event is two components, the social and the dance. Here is what the CSPC newsletter says about the event:

Now you can dance the night away on Wednesday.  The Hump has music you can talk over and play to.  It has an 'I touch myself zone' and a puppy pile and plenty of room to dance.   This event is mostly sex-focused.  Light BDSM play is encouraged in the back. The music theme will be different each week, and The Hump Team would love to hear your suggestions.

Spend some time to chat & then dance the night away at The Hump!

Where to begin? Where to begin?

First, the convention was awesome. I had an excellent time just being me for a weekend. Friday night was black velvet and 6" platform boots. The skirt is made from crushed, black velvet and it is long, flowing, and very pretty. Frankly, it is one of my favorites. The blouse is a square scoop, burned out velvet with angle sleeves. I hung out a lot on Friday in the Intergalactic Bank of Timbuktu (IBT) room that evening and got to know some of the group. Miss Billy Jean complimented me on my look and manners a lot. She was also the new Whip Mistress for the event. In short, She flattered me a lot and it felt really good to hear it. I should be honest; I was complimented the whole weekend long. And all week long, it felt wonderful.

Oh, and how could I forget to mention Ash. This man flogged me to near orgasm at the previous RustyCon. His flogger collection is most impressive, which includes a little evil number made from kangaroo hide. While I was not flogged by it, the test smacks on the underside of my wrist left red lines for a little while. I was imagining how that would feel. Hell, imagining it now makes me all gooey. Probably not the best idea, sitting in a conference room at work while I type this up.

Saturday, I asked the IBT folks if they needed any help and, sure enough, they did. They were looking for someone to help with slave check in, so I signed up! There were some benefits to this, as I sold myself to bank for $200,000 Tim-Bucks, a fictional currency for the auction. Not a bad starting proposition.

I went and talked with a friend about some erotic photos we are planning to do. For this, I wore my charcoal gray, pinstripe pantsuit with my purple satin, Victorian over-bust corset, and a mesh shirt. I wore my 5-inch spike heel, fuck me pumps with the ankle straps. To crown my head, I donned the purple wig. On a whim this time, I wore a bra with the corset and the effect was certainly intriguing. I might do that again just to double check myself.

I liked this outfit since I first conceived of it when I saw the 2-piece set in the Lane Bryant catalog. The whole thing just rather popped into my head and I had fixated on it ever since. You know what I am speaking of, the ready for business. :)

After dinner, I went back and began readying myself for the auction. Sadly, this would be an outfit without stockings or garter belt since my garter belt was missing a stay and, thusly, had to be discarded for this outfit. So, I stripped off everything except for my "Love" underwear, it's black with a rainbow heart on the ass. It's really cute and does wonders for holding me in.

The first item to go on was the black PVC mini dress. It's a tight fitting dress with lace trim at the hem, the bust and wrists and it features a double zipper in the front. My boots went on next. Normally I wear stockings with these, so this was a new and interesting feel for me. I think I prefer them with stockings, however.

I took some time to redo my makeup in a more flamboyant style before putting on my posture collar. Finally, I took some time to slip on the PVC gloves that lace up the arm. I like to think I was looking pretty hot.

I arrived at the room with about 15 minutes to spare and spent time talking to Zoe about proper procedure. We exchanged some comments about preferred titles and I began referring to her as Mistress Zoe. I had several duties that night. For starters, I was charged with making sure that the slaves in the pit read and signed the role-playing agreement and fill out their questionnaires. The auctioneer sells the slaves to the audience and uses the questionnaires as talking points and fodder. I also corralled the slaves, line them up, and make sure they are in were in a proper state of mind. Lastly, I was at Mistress Zoe's beck and call, fetching Her drinks and food when needed.

In all, I submissive to the rest of the IBT staff, but was dominant to the slaves. It is not often I switch, and it is generally not something I advertise. However it was fun and there was even some growth and enlightenment on my end.

I was one of the last ones to be sold that night because I was working the slave pit.

There was something that I have observed from past auctions and even the one that happened on Saturday. Simply, this is a disconnect of expectations between the purchaser and the submissive. Two years ago, at the Norwescon IBT, I was purchased by a wonderful man, whom we will call "O", and while I enjoyed keeping him company and attending parties with him, I was a bit disappointed because it was not what I was looking to be treated as an equal. In contrast to that, even farther back, I was purchased by a lady, whom I will refer to as "L", where I did nothing but pay attention to her and massaged her and was submissive to her. I can think of other examples as well that deals with friends who were purchased as well. I have some ideas about this, but I digress.

As I just mentioned, this expectation disconnect happened on Saturday. In short, I was purchased and then immediately released not 5 minutes later because the person was "doing it as a publicity stunt for IBT." Those were her words. When I went back up to the IBT room, I had to wait to check in. Frankly, they weren't expecting to have anyone come back quite that soon.

I sat up there and talked with many people. I met and talked with people that I had found online, but never spoken with. That was certainly a good outcome. Many, however, asked me if I was okay and I lied; I was disappointed. I had been hoping to feed my submissive nature, but it was not to be.

In spite of the downbeat ending of the evening, I had fun and I enjoyed myself over all. And I will do it it again. I mean, I am just a glutton for punishment after all. But you already knew that. ;)

I am off to Rustycon this weekend...

...and the hopes of being sold at the chocolate auction dances in my head. Heh. Probably won't happen, but I can hope, can't I? I'm just thinking about what outfits to bring? Hmm, should I bring the latex, the PVC, corsets, velvet? Maybe I should bring the pinstripe suit? Actually, I was already told to bring the pinstripe suit. :)

Will I see you there?

Looking for suggestions...

So, Mistress, has asked me to put together a list of punishments and rewards. I've thought of a couple myself, but I figured I would be adventurous and open it up for others to chime in with.

So, what punishments and rewards do you think I should have? Don't worry if you think it might be too extreme. Once I get all of the ideas compiled and integrated into my own list, I'll post it back here for you all to see. :)

Send me a private message with your suggestions!

Last night was fabulous!

I went to the Little Red Studio's New Year's Eve party. I went to photograph the band, the Nasty Habits, a band composed entirely of transgendered women. And quite simply, they rocked.

Their play list included the Romantic's "What I Like About You", U2's "New Year's Day", The Violent Femme's "Blister in the Sun", Joan Jett and the Black Heart's "I Love Rock and Roll", Billy Idol's "White Wedding" and "Rebel Yell", and many more that are escaping me at the moment.

Before the band started, however, there were performances by Little Red Studio's troupe of performers. They danced and they sang; there were low hanging fairies and when you are wearing 6" heels, it's hard to duck. I loved the dueling poets, which included a bit of audience participation. The gal, whose name I cannot remember at the moment, finished ready a very hot and racy poem when one of the audience members called out, "Top that!"

Well the gauntlet was now cast and in response, Mr. D, as we will call him, threw down the pile of poems he had previously been choosing from, and created poetry off the cuff, speaking directly to said audience member. When he finished, the other poet, "Of all people, of course it would be him to top me."

Mr. D answered her statement, "But I'm a submissive!"

I'm not sure what is about the Little Red Studio, but this is the second time that I have been fed food there by someone. The first time was at Cirque Du Noc by the hot latino guy who was feeding me chocolate. This time, I was fed three times by a couple of beautiful women, one of who complimented me on corset. Since this seems to be a pattern, I may have to return to the studio more often. <i>*evil grin*</i>

I received many compliments from both women and men. My favorite compliment of the evening came from Mr. D when he walked by, looked at the top of my corset, looked at me, smiled, and said, "Nice tits, lady." I blushed, big time. Many people commented on the gray pin-strip pantsuit with the purple Victorian over-bust corset. Later in the evening, I would shed the jacket so that I could possibly cool down. Sadly, I accidentally left it there. Bah.

Other than that mishap, it was a good night and not too bad on the roads getting home. Maybe I just lucked out in that department. :)

It is with a glad heart to say, I had a lot of fun at Cirque du Noc last night. Though I took my camera, I found I was far too self conscious earlier in the evening to take photos. I will certainly have to work on that.

So, what happened? Heh. Let me see if I can remember anything. After arriving and checking in with the volunteer coordinator, I set out to take in the sights and sounds. The music was not bad; had me moving in the very least. I was people watching for the longest time, appreciating those in their finery. There was this hot guy, a Latino I think, who was serving people chocolate vulvas and he kept coming back to me over several occasions to offer me more. I'm not sure if he was just being efficient with his job or he thought I was cute. I'll go with the "he thought I was cute."

I people watched some more when I was approached by a pretty, latex clad maid, who I will call J, and asked if I was there with anyone. When I responded with that I was on my own, J invited me to come join the lady she was with, Ms. L, who was wearing a black latex unitard and a latex wrap with black accents. While I was chatting with Ms. L, J offered to shine my latex with a high gloss latex polish. It was such a divine feeling, being massaged and shined by J. Frankly, I can see why any dominant would enjoy the attention and I can easily envision doing that service for a domme. This just means that it's another service oriented skill I need to learn, though after I learn how to get manicures and pedicures.

The three of us were now sitting in the booth, talking and chatting over the music, watching the dancers on the floor. Well, talking lead to touching and petting and that lead to further caressing and kissing. I was lost in a sea of latex encased bliss. Time was so good that it quickly got away from me and it was time for my shift to begin. To be honest, I missed my starting time by almost 10 minutes.

With this being the last shift, there wasn't a lot of incoming foot traffic, but there was some. A lot of what I was doing was wishing people a safe trip home and thanking them for coming. Miss L stopped by wished me a wonderful weekend and we exchanged contact information. J and I kissed as we said our goodbyes.

Over all, I did not overheat like I thought I might, since this was my first time wearing latex, I wasn't quite sure what to expect. Truth be told, I was comfortable all night long and it was good. Well, until someone left the door open and then a cold wind whipped in, and by cold, I mean frost-bite inducing. Just consider that the thickest thing I was wearing was the PVC in my boots. Everything else was thin latex rubber, the gloves and stockings being thin enough to be transparent and the dress of heavier stock.

An epilogue to this story would be after I arrived home; I cleaned up and washed all of my latex by hand, hanging it up dry, and then showering. I was lying in bed, just looking at my wife and Mistress, soaking in the beauty of Her.

Yes, last night was a good night indeed.

I will have to do more events like that again. Last night very good for me. Went to Cique du Noc's fetish ball last night, watched the people dance, met a lovely couple, and worked the door. I will post more about it later, but here's what I was wearing last night. Shiny rubber from fetishwear.net.

Halloween, that holiday I love and hate...

Don't get me wrong, Halloween is my favorite holiday and that is for a couple of reasons: First of all, the "fun factor" of the holiday is there for me. Maybe it's dress up factor or that I get to try and scare people or that it's emblematic of dark time of the year with spiders and skeletons and horrors (oh my!). I certainly enjoy it for religious reasons, being the blatant pagan that I am and the fact that it is the end of year celebrations that I love so much.

I also realize that there are many girls like me who see this as a time to come out of the wardrobe and be themselves for a night and I respect that a lot, but I have never dressed as my feminine self for Halloween, let alone gone into work that way. Not once. Lately, I've been thinking about why that is as I have never really thought about it before. Though I think I have some insight as to why now.

Let's start with something that has happened rather than with speculation. A couple of years ago, I was involved in the Norwescon Fannish Fetish Fashion Show and while I had a good time over all, there were one thing that really got on my nerves and that was the perception that I was a man wearing a costume. I even had one lady come and compliment me on "my costume", which consisted of a black, sheer blouse, my purple Victorian over bust corset with black Chinese dragons, purple iridescent overskirt, purple satin gloves, and the infamous Top Hat of Doom. During the course of the show, I was continually referred to as a "he", rather than how I was presenting, by the M.C. of the show. I chalk most of that up to lack of education on transgendered issues.

A more recent example would be this last weekend at the ECC game, a weekly live action vampire game I play in, where I played a female non-player character. One of the ending events of the evening was Rutor's Hand wrestling, an obscure Tremere ritual that requires the caster cut off her hand and pluck out her eye—taking 5 levels of unsoakable aggravated damage in the process—and put the together to form an autonomous spy. Think of Thing from the Addam's Family movies but add an eyeball to the back of the hand and you have a pretty good start on the concept. The point of unhappiness was a simple joke that I don't think was meant to hurt my feelings or in anyway demean me. So I'm not about to hold a grudge or anything in regards to it. My character's theme song was Aerosmith's "Dude Looks like a Lady", mind you a song I enjoy very much, but it reinforced the whole "it's just a costume."

Again, let me reiterate again, I don't believe this was born out of hate or bigotry, just from not understanding where I am coming on this road called life. Not a lot of people at the game are aware of my gender issues and still others may have the wrong impression about my issues.

On Friday I had my nails done in fantastic metallic red for the ECC game and I have yet to take off the nail polish yet. I've only been asked about by one person at work so far and I told her I did it for a costumed event and I was thinking about doing the same costume for a party on this coming Saturday. As a result, I've been thinking about going to work as a woman tomorrow, but the costume thing is bugging me, or being perceived as a costume to be more precise.

So this brings me to tomorrow (and Saturday as well): I want to go all dressed up but I don't want to deal with it being a man in a costume.

Sensation denial

Really this is mere an extension of or a form of power exchange, but it's a fetish I have and something I crave a lot of the time. Well, the power exchange is something I crave on many levels. This particular means of sensation denial is almost like a chastity device, from what I envision, but we'll see when we get there.

What sparked this again for me was heading to the Crypt, in Seattle, last night with a friend and found a hollow dildo.

Why would I find this sexy and highly arousing? Think about it from a control perspective. My dominant wants me to fuck them, but to limit my physical pleasure from the experience, so I am to please them with a strap-on. Here I am, please them while my cock is restrained and in a form of bondage. I am pleasing my dominant while I am not being physically pleased.

Does this make sense?

I am a lover of a good mind fuck and have always felt that the greatest erotic organ in the human body is the one between the ears.

A recap of the evening...

The plan was to meet a potential play partner at the Center for Sex Positive Culture, a.k.a. the Wetspot, to interview him using the backdrop of the Grind. The boy had told me how much he had become obsessed with giving me oral satisfaction. Something of a cock addict. Well, obsessed with my girly cock anyway. That being the case, I had a couple of things planned out to see how he did. But the boy never showed.

Am I surprised by this? Not really. I mean, in the back of my head, the manager of my low self-esteem had been declaring this was going to happen and listening to the choruses of "I told you so" certainly were not pleasant.

As was pretty typically, I was terrified to approach anyone and when I did, it was an awkward compliment like, "I love your dress" or "you have legs I would kill for." How lame does that sound? Can we say "iron lung required?"

Occasionally, people would look in my direction or I could see that they were talking, and I fantasized that they were talking about. That they wanted to do things with me; to me even, hat I am desirable, that they were planning on coming over and initiating some kind of scene. Yeah, that's kind of sad in the end, I know.

Though in all of this, I did something new for me: I got out on the dance floor and danced. Mind you it was all by myself the whole time and it really amounted to nothing more than a glorified white-boy dance, but a dance none the less. Of course, this was after the third aborted try.

There were no one that pointing and staring as the awkward girl, so that was a plus. I danced for about an hour. They weren't noticing me at all. A blessing and a curse from the sounds of it. I definitely felt like the odd girl out. Just like every other time I've been to the Wetspot without a date. Oh yeah, that would be all of them.

I suspect my planning for these kinds of things just plain sucks.

The other day I tried something recommended by one of the members of the Bondage.com Latex group: I used a water based lubricant to help put on one of my gloves. This worked; I was able to slide on the glove and flattened out any wrinkles in the latex with ease. I'm rather pleased with the result, though there was something that did not go quite right: the top of the glove kept sliding down my arm. As a result, I do not think that the water based lubricant is the best route going forward, unless someone has some suggestion to keep the cuff of the glove (and perhaps the stocking) from sliding down. I am open to any suggestions on this. :)

1. I need to get a garter belt to match the stockings to hold them up!
2. I need to practice putting on the gloves and stockings. It's quite a bit different than nylons and velvet gloves. :)
3. And I still need to buy something to shine them with.

Word was sent today that my latex dress is done and awaiting me to go pick it up! Yea! *does a happy dance*

Now I will have to go pick up something to shine it to a high gloss so it suitably presentable! Then I have to go show it off! Then photos of me in it have to be taken! I'm trying to figure out when I can go get it with everything that is going on today. *bouncy*

Once I have a better idea of when and where, would anyone like to help me take some photos of me in it, I would appreciate the help as always.

The Fitting

So this evening was the fitting for the latex dress I paid for from fetishwear.net. The dress isn't finished yet, but it is close. Though it didn't quite fit right at the back of the arms, it looked wonderful! One of the things that I like the list about my body is my Dunlops Disease. Let's face it, dears, I do not wear my fat in a very feminine way. With the weight loss, I've reached another plateau where the weight loss has come all but a halt, though I have lost 4 inches around the waist.

However, that dreaded belly is not that prominent at all in the dress with its flared skirt just about the knee. I cannot wait to see what it will look like with the purple trim.

*bounce* *bounce*

On Tuesday evening, I had an appointment with Tanya Winter, of FetishWear.net, for a fitting and measurements.  I decided to go casual, wearing a knee length, blue denim and cotton skirt, my favorite black velvet blouse, my boots, a black bra, and my net shirt.  I curled my hair and did my makeup in subtle, earthy colors; browns and coppers.  Mistress complimented me on how I looked.  Every time she mentions something like that, it makes my day in so many ways!  Not much later and I went out the door.

The drive down to west side of Seattle was uneventful, though I did need to pull over a couple of times and consult the map.  I make it to Tanya’s location, amazingly enough, without taking any wrong turns and I am on time.

Tanya greets me and welcomes me into her workshop and we chat for a bit and she brings out two dresses for me to look at.  Both are purple, one with light blue trim and the other with silver trim.  She gives me a few suggestions to help make putting on the dresses easier.  With that, she lets me be while I strip down to my underwear and I attempt to put on the one with the blue trim.

Out of the two, this is the one I really liked.  I was able to get the dress to my waist and put my arms in the sleeves, but I couldn’t pull the zipper all of the way up.  Believe me; I tried very hard because I really, really wanted it.  Alas, it was not to be.  I tried on the other dress on, and while I got it on further than the other one, it still didn’t fit.  Sigh.

Tanya and soon talked and took measurements.  We talked about a lot of things, including what a pain in the ass it is to find boots for girls with big calves.  She also asked where I got the mesh shirt, which was from Venus when it was open.  As fate would have it, she made the mesh shirt I was wearing.  Another thing we discussed was the problems of weight loss and buying clothes.  Really, weight loss, as far as your wardrobe is concerned, is a mixed blessing.  On the one hand, you get to buy new clothes.  On the other hand, you have to buy new clothes.  We talked about a good number of things including corsets and how to look your best when you’re kind of pear shaped.  We talked about what I liked from the website.

What we decided on was the black with purple trim of the Latex Dress with Trim from the website, but with a flared skirt and the zipper up the back.  I’m really looking forward to it, though it is unlikely I will have it prior to Norwescon.  Yes, sadness ensues, but I understand the time constraints and prior commitments.  I am really exciting about this.

The way I’m acting...

...you’d think I was going on a date this evening.  Imagine this, I’m walking out of the restroom at work and the first thing that comes into my head is: “Oh my goddess, what am I going to wear this evening?”  I was truly in a panicked state of mind.

My well-reasoned brain kicked in with, “You’re going to get fitted.”  The sarcastic drawl continued with, “It’s not a date.”

“Puh.  It doesn’t hurt to look my best, does it?  Now go away, I have an outfit to pick!”

It’s these kinds of conversations that give me the giggles.  For the most part, I was thinking about going casual this evening, probably a jean skirt and blouse, nothing too exciting at any rate.

I’ll go looking at clothes after I make dinner...

Granted, I’m not quite done with my Silly Fitness Bet, as I am in the last week of it, so some might say this is a tad premature.  However, I’ve satisfied the requirements of the bet by completing 10 of the 12 weeks and scoring 6 bonus weeks in the progress.  This week is just extra gravy that I intend to achieve regardless.

For those of you unaware, I have been participating in Silly Fitness Bets with a group of my friends since September of last year.  The idea is not so much to award me for losing weight, though that’s not bad, but rather to not have to face the consequences.  The first bet would’ve had me cutting off me hair to a short bob above the ears.  However, the corset I won for that bet still needs to be paid for.  The second bet would’ve had me using my spiffy mobile phone for nothing but a phone for 3 months.  That would’ve been horribly, horribly nasty for me to go through.  I’m one of these people who love their gadgets.  For me, the bets have been very effective and I've lost over 40 pounds to date!

The reward for this bet was that for every week I complete, I stashed away $10 towards the purchase of my first piece of latex clothing.  If I completed a bonus week, I would put away $20 for the week.  So this weekend I put out the call to a couple of LJ communities for recommendations on a T-girl friendly latex vendor and the name that popped up consistently was Tonya Winter’s www . fetishwear . net.  The dress I picked out is one  www . fetishwear . net / catalog / RS610.html, though with purple trim, not blue.  Tomorrow, I go to get fitted in the hopes of having it prior to Norwescon.  In e-mail correspondences, Tonya indicated that she might have something already that may fit me that would be ready to take home for a good price.

So I’ve been reading web sites on latex care and storage.  Hopefully I will be well armed to take care of this investment.

Really, it’s not about cumming in undies.  Not that I mean that too much...

Toni and I have developed a really good rapport with each other and her suggestibility is really high now when we chat and slips easily into trance.  Perhaps if you sat in the passenger seat with me, you’d see where the arousal comes from on my part.

We had started talking about subliminal imagery used in animations with trance susceptible people.  At this point she was already lightly in trance and the animation in question was all about the need and the desire for orally satisfying male genitals, more simply known as cock.  This is when She come out to play. 

She said to Toni, “You know, if you stop and think about it, I’m sure you may even be able to taste the hot cum in your mouth.  Isn’t that right?” 

Let me take a moment to diagram the suggestion, just to give you an idea of how this mechanism works, in terms of permissive hypnosis.  The suggestion is comprised of three chunks, which I call “The Possible Premise”, “The Action Statement”, and “The Re-Enforcer”. 

Simply, “The Possible Premise” setups up the possibility for “The Action Statement”.  If you look at the suggestion above, “The Possible Premise” can be shortened from “You know, if you stop and think about it, I’m sure you may be able to” to “You may be able to”, the being the word may as it sets up “The Action Statement” as something that could happen.  The equivalent in authoritative hypnosis, which is the most commonly known form of hypnosis thanks to the Count Dracula, the hypnotist would say something like, “You taste the hot cum in your mouth.”  Most people, some say about 75%, will reject this suggestion out of hand because the conscious mind will go, “No, I don’t taste it at all.  Sorry.”  Since we’ve set it up to be a possibility, the subconscious is more willing to says, “I don’t know, can I?”

“The Action Statement” is the meat of the suggestion, which we want to create.  Here’s thing to be careful of.  If the suggestion is in direct opposition to what the person wants or is perceived as dangerous, the phenomenon known as “The Silent Observer” will kick in to the keep the subject safe and drag them out of the trance and this leads to one of the truths about hypnosis: A hypnotist cannot make you do anything that goes against your core values.  That may make you feel better until you realize there is more to it than just that.  A skilled hypnotist with vast palette of sensations can make the most disgusting, repulsive act seem exceptionally attractive and most desirable object as repulsive as a week old diaper.  Back to our suggestion here, as she’s already orally inclined, the idea is already appealing and memories start to come to her as she thinks about it.  Tastes, smells, sites, the emotions she was feeling.

Lastly, we come to the “The Re-Enforcer” is generally phrased as a leading question to evoke an affirmative response.  In this case, I used, “Isn’t that right?” and with “The Possible Premise”, the leads to the subject to that “yes” that I love to get and with it, the desired effect.

Toni scolded me doing something naughty to her head as she now had the taste of cum in her mouth and she really was really hungry now.

Now image, if you will, you’re on the receiving end and your trusted hypnotist has just used your trigger that drops you into a trance deeper than you had ever been in before.  Now image the hypnotists asks you conjure up memories of your most intense orgasms and all of the sensations that lead up to.  With all of that swirling in your head, the hypnotist utters a phrase and ties it to these memories so that when the phrase is uttered; the memories come flooding back as if you are experiencing it all over again and driving you over the edge.  Even if you’re not in a trance, you would experience the bliss and physical reaction of a very intense orgasm completely at the will of another person.  Just think about that for a moment from the perspective of a power exchange.

Now you’ve been brought back out of trance by the use of a different trigger. You were under for ten minutes at the most, but you’re feeling alert, refreshed, and awake, if a bit hazy, like sleep was still in your eyes.  The conversation seems to pick up where you left off and you don’t really remember your time in trance.  Pleasant conversation is had, when your hypnotist speaks the trigger that brings you to orgasm, making a mess in your undergarments.  You’re startled, and understandably so, by your sudden rise and release.  Overall, it was pleasurable if exceptionally powerful.

Without you being completely under, I begin offering up other experiential suggestions, inducing hallucinations of me caressing you, even though we are in separate physical locations.  In Toni’s case, an ocean separates us, but she could feel my fingers dance across her thighs.  She could feel my breath upon her ear lobe and my voice, whispering in her ear.  Hands explored her body and something began explore other areas, pressing against openings.  All of this was vividly real for her and highly arousing.

Now, imagine if you saw a black, shadowy substance.  Shiny like polished black latex and just as opaque, almost like an oil slick, it encases your feet like a tight, black sock.  The shiny blackness feels warm and it pulses with your heartbeat.  Its grip upon your flesh feels so good that you don’t care if it takes more of you.  In fact, you really hope it does, because maybe it’ll feel even better.  Before you know it, the shiny blackness wrapped your legs up to the thighs.

You wonder what it might feel like if it molded it self to your genitals.  Would it be as pleasurable or even more so?  Would it still be warm and sensuous as it is now?  So soon do you find out as you are now encased up to your hips.

To find out how the rest feels, let me take you down that dark road of hypnotic exploration.  Ask Toni what she thought and maybe it’ll convince you.

I have another hypnosis subject under my skirt these days...

I had a friend on yahoo, Toni is her name, read my post about the hypnosis and asked if I could take her for ride one evening, do a session for her.  That night came to be this evening and we chatted for a bit about what her expectations were of hypnosis and what she knew about it.  I also asked what she wanted to do.  She really didn't know what she wanted, so I threw out of a couple for her to choose from, including experiencing how it would feel to have much larger breasts.  This was an idea she liked and we played with it a bit and eventually came to the idea that she would love to be an air headed bimbo for a while.  So that’s what we set out to do.

I continued to chat with her and formulated my plan in the background.  I suggested to her that perhaps we should introduce a new personality to prevent bleed through during real life obligations.  She really liked this idea and we began our work.  To paraphrase Milton Erickson, pretty much the father of permissive hypnosis, "Any one can be hypnotized, you just have to use the tools they give you."  And Toni gave me some wonderful tools to begin with.

She’s a very submissive girl to start with, so that was one of the tools I used.  Then she made an off hand comment about feeling light headed.  That provided me an in to work the trance up.  Hypnosis is all about trust and consent.  If the hypnotist breaks that trust, the subject will come out trance faster than you know.  The Silent Observer still has a job to do and it will do it.  If you can trust and give your consent, you're half way there.

The short story here, because I don't want to give away my secrets, is that I added two new personalities into the mix.  The first one is like a manager of personalities, used to save and load mental states as it were.  The second one is the big breasted bimbo who loves sex and loves to please people with every orifice.

I ran into a couple of glitches in the handling of the personalities that I need to go back in and make adjustments.  All of her personalities are now very obedient to me, as she requested and she loves to hear me call her a "good girl".

Fortunately for me, it's the end of the day and the soiled undies can be tossed in the dirty laundry. ;)

Note: This is an older post (about 2 weeks ago) from a different journal, but I figured I'd share here for background purposes...

What gets me hot? And when I say hot, I mean creamy in my undies!

In my life, I am a very submissive person who always seeks to please whenever I can and there is one exception to this: Hypnosis. Yes, I love to be on the receiving end of a good trance that leaves me with some tangible effect after the fact. You don’t know how many fantasies I have that run down the vein.

However, there is this domme that lives in my head and She loves take a mind and see what She can do with it; see what boundaries and limits She can push; see if She can make you see and feel things that aren’t there; see if She can make experience changes to your body that aren’t happening. And She gets off on this. Mind you this where the line begins to blur, because I will get very, very aroused and very wet by these hypnotic sessions. I mean I will be wet enough to leak through my clothes! That’s how aroused I get by it.

Don’t get me wrong, if someone sets limits with me and says, “Don’t do X,” “X” will not be done. However, if someone gives a blank check, so to speak, I will see how far I can push things and that typically involves me changing my undies when I’m done.

In writing this, I think I’ve figured out why She loves to come out and play. She loves to come because it’s something that I, so very much, long to happen to me. For someone, such as Her, to come along and play with my boundaries; to push my limits. Take me to new places. Make me experience things that are only real in my head.

I’m still very hot over a session that happened this afternoon, much by accident no less. One of the things I’ve learned how to do is find the tools that people give you to take them into trance. I was having this conversation and I noticed the person I was chatting with was slipping under. Patterns were emerging in his conversation and I picked up on those patterns. As much as I would like to blame Her for this, She is me, so I have none to blame but myself.

So with the pattern presented, I took him very, very deep into trance and worked with him. The hooks he gave me were quite exquisite to be really honest and poking around in his head was just fucking hot! I am still sitting in the undies now because they are reminding me just how hot that session one!

Okay, I should go do something else for a while, but I wanted to get the bits out and flowing.