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I got asked if attending events such as Beyond Leather and Kinky Kollege make me a better Dominant. I'd have to say yes it does. If I'm not learning, I'm dead. I enjoy the education, the fellowship, and certainly the play.
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I missed Sinsations in Chicago last weekend, but have made sure I'm going to Beyond Leather in Fort Lauderdale next month. If you haven't been yet, it's an awesome event. The host hotel is already sold out, but there are rooms available at a 2nd hotel, and if you're REALLY interested, I might be willing to share.
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Kinky Kollege was last weekend and I must say that I had a blast. Met some new friends and saw some old ones. This was another of MasterZ's events that I have commented on before.
For anyone who peeks at my journal on occasion, know that I'll be back in Chicago in March of 2010 for Sinsations in Leather.
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Let me start out here by saying I am ONLY intersested in those women who were BORN women. For some reason, occasionally other choices seem to be ticked, and that PISSES me off. So to restate, I am only seeking submissive or slave WOMEN who were born WOMEN.
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I just got finished with Sinsations in Leather in Chicago. This is my second LeatherSINS event hosted by MasterZ Chicago. I can't recommend his events enough. The next LeatherSINS event will be Kinky Kollege that is held in September. He is already planning it and there should be some incredible presenters and workshops.
I had a great time. I attended some excellent workshops, learned some new things, met some great people and renewed some old friendships.
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I'm on my way to Milwaukee area next week, the scene of a few memorable scenes for me, looking forward to reconnect with some old friends and forge a few new relationships. One thing I have found about this journal is to choose my words carefully, for I don't know which ones I'm going to have to eat. But having already been a part of the Wisconsin community for a few years will enjoy myself no matter what.
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What a difference 6 months makes. I'm back in Florida after a great 6 months in NYC. Met some wonderful people as a result. A lot of them not even in NYC. And I'm heading back to NYC next month for what may be the most important meeting so far. She's an incredible girl, and I couldn't be happier. I've said timing is everything and considering what I've been through in recent months, she couldn't have come along at a better time. More WILL be revealed.
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I'm really pumped about going to www.BeyondLeather.com in Florida the weekend of April 10th -13th. SirTop and slave bonnie have really put together a great event. World class demos and speakers.
See www.beyondleather.net
Hope to see you there.
Another event I'll be participating in is TES-fest weekend of July 4th.
Pavlov
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NY, NY, it's a helluva town. Been here for a few weeks. Meeting some great folks. A learning experience to be sure. That's the way it should always be though.
Went to the Apple Munch, and a couple of Dom/sub Friends demos at Paddles. Even used a ruler on a very bad girl on Punishment night.
There are certainly some prospects in the tri-state area and I'm enjoying getting to know y'all here. |
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I've settled in to my new digs in Riverdale, and it's been like old home week. I've not made it into a TES meeting yet, but hope to in the next couple of weeks. My schedule is pretty busy at the moment, But I hope to get to Paddles the weekend of the 25th.
J |
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It's been a long time since my last journal entry. A lot has happened since then.
If you've checked out my profile before, you'll see a major change and that is my relocation back to NYC. I'm returning to my old position after getting an offer I could NOT refuse. I look forward to rebuilding friendships with the folks at TES and Paddles and forging new ones.
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Apparently someone has hacked into my Yahoo Acount. Anyone who has my messenger information should delete PavlovTrainer from their messenger list. I will create a new Yahoo nick and if you want to be added, let me know here. I'm fortunate that I haven't done any business through yahoo and it shouldn't affect me too much. Just a major pain in the ass. Let the floggings begin
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there's that saying that life happens when you're making other plans. Unfortunately when blogging, I don't always take that into consideration. Right now things are in a bit of limbo. Might not be a bad idea to share what's happened rather than what MIGHT happen. |
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It's been a while since my last conf-- errrr journal entry here on CM. I have posted a few things on my 360 page since September.
I've said that timing is everything, and have to say that the statement has proven itself to me once again. I'm beginning a journey like no other I've taken before, with a slave who's like no one I've met before.
There are obviously no guarantees, but plenty of opportunities. Every conversation we have strengthens the bond we are establishing.
If the rapport we are building between us translates into Real Time, We will be a CollarMe success story for the ages.
For those of you still searching, learn from your mistakes and successes and never give up hope or your integrity.
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A thought occured to me while reading profiles. I read the comments about submissive women not willing to change something about themselves (weight, smoking) for a Dom/Master.
My thought about this is that neither one of these activities is considered healthy. I as a Dominant/Master want to own my girl for as long as humanly possible. To do that I want her to be at her best. I call it the pride of ownership.
When I read this sort of statement I wonder why the submissive would not want her prospective mate to be interested in making positive changes in her life?
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How about a report on this weekend's FetishCon in Tampa?
Let's see, where do I start? Well the Hyatt Hotel was a great location. Of course, the restaurant was way too expensive. I tried a salad that was actually tasty, but certainly not worth the price.
The Models all looked appropriately great. I saw people I had met at Orlando Bash and enjoyed building on those meetings.
The vendors were a lot of fun. There were some new ones that I wasn't familiar with and enjoyed looking through their wares.
The club parties were really the worst part of the weekend. WAY too many people. Smokey as hell, and not enough dungeon equipment. The models did put on some fun shows though.
One other suggestion for the clubs. They have video screens. When the models are doing their shows, show them on the screens so everyone can see them.
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I read a new member's ad today and was saddened by her tale of betrayal. In my response of support to her, I coined an appropriate term B/s. This is what is practiced by those who are discrete due to spouses who don't understand, or those who only want to play online games but forget to inform anyone in their ad. |
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I thought I'd report on the Orlando Bash. Didn't see any of the lobbyists there. Started off on a sad note, but got better as the weekend progressed. Saw some great demos, and did a lot of interior work as well. I was DM for a few shifts as well. Some very intense scenes, as well as some very sensuous onces as well. Another great thing about the weekend was meeting up with a bunch of kinksters who are also in recovery. Quite a group.
And then there's that spiritual axiom of one door closing and another opening, but it's still hell in the middle. |
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I went to a Shibari South Florida meeting tonight and had a great time. The demo on Self Bondage was incredible and I actually thought that I might one day consider the possibility of pursuing the option of practicing bondage on myself. Then I said, Naaaaaah, it's MUCH more fun practicing and perfecting on a girl.... |
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Things I have learned.......
1. I enjoy being called Master at the right time, but I LOVE being called Daddy.
2. Online, being the fickle medium that it is, no matter how close we seem to be growing, nothing is what it appears until we've had a chance to meet RT. and meet probably twice, just to be sure.
3. I've always been a protector. When a submissive, novice or experienced is approached by A**hole, I can always be called upon to step in to protect her.
4. All God's chilluns got Baggage. You don't have to face yours alone, IF you're willing to face it. Don't let it prevent you from finding happiness. |
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Well roomies and roomettes, it's about 4 months since my last conf uhhhhh rant.
When beginning a relationship, do what you can to protect it from outside influences. I'm not saying to let yourself be seperated from your friends, just don't let them fill your head with unnecessary fears about the relationship.
Now there are a few items in profiles that I have to comment on.....
"I'm not a doormat." Those of us who wouldn't treat you like a doormat in the first place, don't need to read it. But most importantly, those who WOULD treat you like a doormat will not suddenly have a moment of clarity and say to themselves, "Oh DAMN, I can't treat her like a doormat, I guess I better move on and find someone who I can."
Next, "submission is a gift". Based on that statement, Dominance is a gift as well. So the Power Exchange is essentially a Gift Exchange. Reminds me of an old couplet I once heard.
"She offered her honor,
He honored her offer,
And all night long,
It was Honor and Offer
Honor and Offer"
We will now continue with your regularly scheduled program. |
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2 thoughts have occured to me recently about the power exchange.
When I am called Sir out of earned respect instead of general protocol, it still is an amazing feeling.
Also, the power to bring a blush to a girl's cheeks is sooooo much fun.
The little things really DO make a difference in the beginning of the journey.
John |
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One thing about journal entries, as in life, choose my words carefully, I never know which ones I'm going to have to eat. A Dominant eating humble pie, hard to imagine I know. That relationship I mentioned in my previous entry, seems to have poofed. Sad but true. I think the best way to approach this is to protect those friendships that I'm developing and if one becomes closer in a VERY obvious way, THEN say something more. I'm enjoying the friendships I have developed so far. |
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I am going to be signing off the site for a while. I've begun a relationship with one who has tremendous potential. I want to protect the relationship in it's infancy. After we are together, I will return to have you share in our joy. |
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I find it interesting that so many submissives are asked the "what are you into" question. My thoughts regarding negotiation are pretty simple. We can fill out the lists and compare notes, but then the Dominant is giving the submissive ALL of the control. Talk about topping from the bottom. Negotiation in it's purest form consists of Hard Limits if a non-slave relationship, Physical Limitations, and Safewords if allowed. Just some not so random thoughts on a Friday night. |
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If a complete stranger wants to send me a flaming email about my picture or journal, please have the courage to post one of your own AND not block me from replying. Otherwise it just makes me chuckle. |
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Once again, I continue to learn. Decisions made in the heat of desire need to be tempered with time. No matter how strong the mental connection is for me, if there's not a physical connection as well, then things will not work out unless the relationship is VERY special. I look at it this way. If it's right, then nothing can make it wrong. If it's wrong, then nothing can make it right. And THAT works BOTH ways, fortunately OR unfortunately as I've recently found out. |
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I've learned once again just how important communication is. I am a Master who needs to have contact with his property. Whether the relationship is fully established or "budding", the depth of commitment is shared through the depth of communication.
It's amazing to me how honest communication, though sometimes painful, can bring amazing results. I look forward to marking our progress here. |
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Disappointment is so ummmmm disappointing. We Dominants are subjected to the same disappointments and delays that you submissives and slaves are. The best thing that I can say is to remember who and what I am. |
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6 days. I know a lot can happen in 6 days, heck, God is said to have created the world in 6 days. I'm expecting a visitor, waiting to go into more depth, to protect our budding relationship. But anticipation is a good thing for this Master. |
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I've had a somewhat humbling experience regarding integrity. I was faced with making a tough choice and I know I made the right one. The fact that someone got hurt and NOT in a good way, made it more difficult. So did the fact that I have to wait to feed this hungry beast. BUT she's been whispering to my heart for a while and the whisper has become a crescendo to a shout. |
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Well, let's see. The little angel seems to have flown the coop. There were some real steps taken in my direction, but when it came right down to it, I suppose she got scared.
I have a theory about rejection. No matter the reason, it's not fun when it happens. So I've found that when I've been rejected by someone, I'm also rejecting another sub. So if you're feeling rejected for any reason, ask yourself, who am I rejecting and why? Now if you're being contacted by a number of HNG's then by all means, let them have it with both barrelss.
John |
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The next few days are going to be REALLLY interesting. A wild little angel is poised to visit and if all goes well.... I believe the secret to success on this site is to Be real, Be honest, Be ready, and probably the most difficult thing, Be patient. |
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It's interesting to read how submissives really hate..
1). One line responses
2). No response
3). HNG cliches ( Do I REALLY have to repeat them?)
And yet a well thought out response with no vulgarity, orders or penis pics, is read but not responded to.
Ahhhh well, such is the beast that is online BDSM. |
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The thing about the lobby is that I do not want to get into an LDR again. Been there and done that. I don't want to relocate either right now. Of course being that Sarasota is getting VERY expensive, relocation might become an option again. |
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Well it's been an intersting few days on the site. I've been hanging out in the lounge, getting to know quite a few Doms and subs.
The lounge gets quite crowded and There are people from all over the world, literally.
I'm in Florida, and I prefer to have any subs come to me. I've traveled quite often during the last 8 years and for now, I need to bloom where I'm planted. I've developed some friendships and some roots that I want to keep and continue cultivating.
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To Journal or not to journal....
Well, it's not something I do very often, once in a while, but not for long.
Might be interesting though to post progress, not reviews of course, just progress.
I've spent the past few months regrouping, hanging out with friends, with the occasional date, but nothing too serious. Mainly because I wasn't at my best. Now things are more comfortable with me and I'm prepared to continue my search.
I'm going to work at writing a bit each day for a while and see how it develops. Gonna be a helluva ride, I suspect. |
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