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Deeply submissive female who is interested only in a Man who understands the difference between dominant and domineering -- One who uses insight and caring to help develop His submissive to become everything He desires. And one of His desires is to guide me into being all I can, and should, be.
Please be at peace with who and what you are as a dominant male, and content with your accomplishments in life.
You should have a fair amount of wisdom, which is not the same thing as intelligence .
Please be someone who appreciates -- AND HAS -- good, “polite-society” manners and etiquette.
I'm looking for an actual -- and mutual -- emotional relationship, one which has the potential for something lasting, NOT just kinky sex all by itself. "Play partners" are a dime-a-dozen. I prefer SomeOne of value!
After details of your character are known -- Your morals, values and ethics -- then W/we will speak of limits; the hard, the medium, and the soft…
This woman is a true submissive, born that way. Not a bottom player to be Topped for scening, who then goes away, acting as if nothing happened. Trust, Honesty, and Mutual Respect are not only goals, but are the foundation of this lifestyle as well.
There is honor in being a Dominant.
There is also honor in being a submissive.
This is a relationship between TWO G/givers, not a Taker and a giver, as each offers a priceless Gift to the other.
Are we opposite sides of the same D/s coin ?
Some may be surprized, but even though I am on this site, I am not a masochist or pain-slut ---- though I may be called a “praise-slut”. 
Those sensations DO have a definite importance, but they are not the driving force as to why I seek a D/s relationship.
Not interested in the Extremely harsh or emotionally cold aspects some people want out of this life-style, and I freely admit that I need to be loved as much as I need to give love. If one of Your control-methods is by denying me of Your love and affection, I am not the submissive for You. Love will get You EVERYTHING. Love is my strongest motivation. I am a Pisces, after all!
I'm a heterosexual female, healthy and am without any “body decorations”. Your clean bill of health is vital! This is because I donate blood several times a year to very vulnerable little ones. (The Red Cross informed me that there's some fairly rare factor in my blood.)
Disease, drug, tobacco free... and I drink alcohol only occasionally.
Lived for over 25 years in a relationship that was so vanilla that the Vanillas would stand around, point at us, and laugh! I'm serious. No kidding!
I am fully prepared to live my life by learning its lessons the way God intended it to be (for me) -- alongside my Dominant One.
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Thank goodness I have patience. |
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Oh ! There are bonus points for pilots, navigators, ... flyers of all kinds. Fly me ?
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Some people!
Look... Collarme is not a charity site for guys who can't afford hookers and are looking for a freebie!
Nor is it some sort of online shopping experience, where there is a warehouse of subbies just wanting to jump off the shelf because they match your list of wants.
Nor is it a drive-thru at Sub-way... "Place order here; please pull up to the second window..." |
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... the willow's strength is in its ability to bend
and yield in gratitude to the wind
-- c. |
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One could say that my main "fetish" is a hunger I have to show REAL respect. This type doesn't go out to just anyone who tells me that he or she deserves it. The respect I show has greater value, because it's not feigned.
Please, those of you who consider yourselves to be a Dominant, forgive me if I need time to discover the truth of that for myself.
[This is what my first Dominant/Mentor taught me.] Until then (outside of lifestyle events or dungeon scenes) you are just like anyone else.
Please remember that I get hit on by rude creeps too, and they also use the title "Dominant".
No offense intended to anyone. Please don't take it as such. |
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(The complete poem, I had written here, now has a meaning too private to share. This is all I have left..... -- 8/9/2010)
How can one fully taken by passion
ever forget ...
...
Both,
yet and still
... without.
9/28/09 CMP |
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For a very long time, I've been "hyper vigilant" and always on guard on this, or any site.
(Some people here have been wonderfully supportive, but email exchanges weren't meant to be a start to anything more.)
The vast majority of emails have come from those who re-enforce my fears and doubts about this.
Occasionally, there would be someone who would address me as an equal. Or someone that was simply an interesting human being, and we'd email for a while.
Then, once and a while, someone would entice me into a long exchange of intellectual and philosophical D/s viewpoints that would keep me safely "in my head", but not much beyond that.
I'm not an "AnyOne's" ... I am A "SomeOne's".
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Finals are done. Yippee!!!! And I did it! 4.0 GPA for the courses I took this semester. Soon I begin my internship with a HUGE, multi-national non-profit organization. That's the good news. For the sad news, I was just informed in an email here that someone is telling people that I am a, and I quote, "frontman for a money scam".
I contacted the person who is keeping the list and asked if I offended him or her somehow, and offered to talk. Or if that person was told this by someone else, to ask that person to contact me here.
I explained that none of my emails, or my profile, or any of my forum posts even imply such a thing, and that maybe there is some guy who is using this as a way of getting even with me for not playing into his games. |
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As of this past October, I was inducted into Phi Theta Kappa. This semester I may earn a 4.0 GPA. I have completed Service Learning through my Public Relations course. (I had a Real Life PR client). I was asked to head up and re-activate a college department's academic club, and am teaching and mentoring students in an inner city "alternative" school.
Then tonight, someone who uses commas instead of apostrophes, and thinks the women here are like those portrayed on BSDM porn sites, just told me I wasn't very intelligent. Sigh...
Why? Because I wouldn't play his game -- during his very first email contact...
Such is Life! |
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Friday night.
It's nice to be home again.
Tonight I was on one of the worse dates ever ! Thankfully, I got home early. Now this man, I AM going to overtly ignore!
(Can you "overtly" ignore someone??? Is it "covertly" ??? Or is ignoring a tactic only of "subversion" ???) |
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What was in the air last night anyway ! Or was it a phase of the moon, or were the planets out of alignment ?
It was a very bad day here. Someone took something personally, that I never intended to go that way.
An ultra "Christian" male wanted me to buy into that "women were put on this earth by God for the sole purpose of pleasing men" garp.
Then someone else wanted me to explain an old argument he had with his Ex-wife, and proceeded to jump all over me for trying!
Then to top off the day, in the wee hours of the morning, when I did not accept a dominATE'S invitation, and told him about the "dominate VS Dominant" part of my journal, then wished him well, he responded with this charming email:
"actually I really did not read your profile.You looked like an easy piece as you can tell I am used to hot young women not shivered up tumbleweed in your pussy women like you....Good luck to you also,you will need it......"
... and promptly blocked me.
He attached his wedding picture ! omg ! (Beautiful woman, btw. )  |
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Sometimes people are clueless....
Why is it that some people don't seem to understand the difference between being a Dominant (a noun) with all the leadership, and the care and nurturing it takes... and the word -- the verb -- to "dominate" ?
Quotes from some people (emails and profiles):
"Hey, i'm a Dominate and i's only 20 miles from you babe !"
"so you lookin' fer a Dominate hon?"
"i am a born dominate! i want nothing less than a born sub!"
"To dominate" someone doesn't make one a Dominant. Some Dominants are more effective and controling without overtly dominating their submissive. It's only a part of what a Dominant does --- this dominating thing.
To add to some people's confusion, try this on for size...
My ex-husband would dominate me through his passive aggression. I would submit to it. Yet, he was 100 % vanilla; and isn't even close to being a DominaNT, and though I was born submissive by nature, I was never his submissive.... but I was his wife.
If You understand what the above means, you are rare, not to mention intelligent --- AND Wise.
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Summer Term has ended! 16 weeks of classes condensed into a mere 5 weeks. Many days I put in 10 non-stop hours (and a few 14 hour stints) typing research papers & reports, doing practice tests, preparing timelines and other projects, participating in MANDATORY on-line discussions with other classmates, testing, etc... But it was worth it! I got "A" s in both classes, and raised my GPA to 3.7.
I think I deserve a reward.... |
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funny thing... I wonder if men have the wrong idea about what a "submissive woman" is? Why is it that so many assume it means they get an immediate free webcam sex peep show? That I am suppose to take off my clothes for them before any sort of relationship develops where that activity just MIGHT become appropriate one day.
And they hide behind the idea that they "are dominant" and "just testing" my submissiveness....
Frankly, I believe there are too many horny vanilla men here looking for what they think are Easy women ! But maybe there are some women here who fall for these tricks, or have low self-esteem, or are falsely labeling themselves as "submissives" who help perpetuate this situation.
Men ( if You truly are Dominants ) please show it
-- By proving that You are in control of Yourself before attempting to control a submissive one. How are we suppose to surrender all of ourselves to someone who we can't even trust to truly be in control of his own lust?
Which of Your "heads" are in charge anyway?
Are You gonna be helpless and weak and let your cock lead YOU around ?!!
here's a clue for the merely sex driven males:
The best sex happens when Your big head uses the little head to do YOUR bidding. |
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The time of my solo journey as a woman is beginning as my divorce is final, while yet, oddly, another new chapter in my Journey seems to be beginning as well. Because of the divorce, there's a possibility that I will no longer being a submissive woman without a Dominant.
O/one can learn only a little by yourself -- all alone.
Traveling is still an issue (even locally!), but everything good has it's price. There is someOne who feels right for what I need. And I have so much to learn! |
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| Age: 39 |
| NYC,
New York |
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