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Life consists of waking up at 3.30am to be at work by 5am, getting home after work, cycling with the dog. Eating something and go to sleep. - Hectics. But it does pay off as visiting London in a month. |
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Rumors are that I'm a fake. I can refer to my network on here which is filled with people that I know IN person. If you still aren't sure then I can also refer to my Informed Consent profile as well as the profile.
And it was my birthday yesterday :D |
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New photo! Last one in the album! |
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New girl and I are going for a weekend away next week. Going to the farm to have a time out with girls from our course! |
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College. New girl to play with. And I've got a Siberian Husky.
Life is busy! |
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Home sweet home!
So good to be in the UK! |
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Having one of my extra bright moments here!
Am at home in London. Already caught up with a few good friends! Staying with the Captain and Muvva but got hugs of Cosmic and Athor last night! Met up with my ex/one of my best friends today for a chat, hugs and picking up things at his.
Now currently writing a mail to the woman in my life trying to phrase how much I love that girl *smiles* |
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A week till I go home to London. That Friday next week cannot come soon enough! |
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Honestly. I'm going rather crazy here in Iceland. I miss my friends in London but I also must carry on doing what I'm doing as I've got lots of responsibilities over here that I can't run away from even though I want to! My life is way too complicated to be honest at times!
Homesick to Iceland when I live in London.
Homesick to London when I live in Iceland.
I fail. |
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Two weeks till my next visit home to London! - Am getting stirr crazy here in Iceland! |
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Bed time!
Been a fucking brilliant night! Had the best time! - Now so shattered I can't even stand up! Barely sit straight even!
Sleep! |
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Why is it so hard to find a needle bunny? ~sighs~
Am desperately looking for a female sub/maso that likes needles! ~growls~ |
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Am going home in 5 days and 8 hours. Am really looking forward to it! I miss the boyfriend, I miss my friends and I miss my pain!
It's been nice to be back in Iceland. But damnit I rather be at home! :o |
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Homesick. Soooo homesick.
Only 8 more days to go. |
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I'm feeling stupidly homesick. I kinda don't feel at home here in Iceland but I missed it so when I was in London and when I am here in Iceland I really really miss London.
I reckon that it's mainly as a big part of my heart belongs in London... |
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I'm stupidly happy.
I met someone in the very end of October that completely surprised me and made me fall in lust and then in love with him.
I'm now in a happy relationship with him. He's really made me happy and he makes me feel so comfortable.
Viskan |
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I said to someone the last few days that I am a simple girl with simple needs. That I live to love and love to live and I could do without all the drama and complications. I still stick by that.
Life as been throwing me surprises the last few months that I haven't really been sure how to properly deal with to be honest, but they are all welcome as they are a part of life. Surprises and changes I can deal with but it's the matter of how big they are and how they are going to be affecting me in the long run that I have worried about. I've decided to stop worrying and just go with the flow.
I am genuinely happy at the moment. Sure I miss my best friend, family and my dog but it doesn't mean that I shouldn't do what is best for me. I've taken the first step to become myself again and that meant leaving some of the people and the dog that matter the world to me. - I know, it may sound strange but I know that I have to do what's right for me right now.
Life is complicated at the moment but I'll take life as it comes.
Love, V. xx |
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How bad is it...
That I've managed to spend about ?100 on clothes and makeup in the last 2 days? :P
Though must admit I really like what I've got myself, however I don't understand how I managed to spend that much and on NOTHING kinky, that is really shocking!
However, I feel like I deserved to treat myself a little bit. Life has really been changing the last few weeks and I have a feeling it's going to be changing a bit more, which is pleasing.
V. x |
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A few facts
a) It's too cold to go out for a fag! Have nearly decided to quit smoking till it's not -8°c!
b) I hate trying to figure out what to pack and what not!
c) I can't wait till the 28th! My patience is very extremely limited at the moment. |
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Just finished my dress for NYE tonight! Hope it's going to be liked by those I'm going out with!
Was up sewing till 7.30 this morning! Am glad I've finished it as it's just few days till X-mas and getting shorter till the 28th!
*big smile* |
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I'm so happy and content at the moment, and it's not just because I had a fantastic shower and a smoke!
Life is just going the right way, have been hiccups but it's still going fantastic to be completely honest!
Just know that something good is coming my way! |
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Is feeling very good about myself. Positive changes are definately happening! |
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Am well amused! Not long now till I'll be next in London! |
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I've had the BEST November! And I know that December is going to be JUST as good!
I really feel like I'm ontop of the world at the moment. It's strange. Things are really falling into place, they have for the last month and now there is anticipation and lots of smiling going on.
How come good things seem to happen all at once?
Is karma finally catching up with me?
Love, V. xxx |
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Is having a major fail.
One needs eggs for baking. Forgot to get them! |
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Is amused. It's snowing like CRAZY at the farm in Iceland. Can barely see the car now! |
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London again in 2 months! I can't bloody wait! |
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Pleahurg!
Just woke up. Am still really tired... after nearly 11 hours sleep.
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Spent a few days at the farm. Batteries have been recharged. |
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Getting desperate to visit London *sigh* |
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Ohh... today has been interesting to say the least.
Can't wait till next month. |
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Something I just wrote about how I feel when I am playing.
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The thing is that I really like to be hurt. I like the soaring pain whilst playing. I like to feel every stroke getting harder and then softer and then harder again. I like the sensation of it. And I love to be brought to tears, though there I only trust one person to actually bring me to tears and make me cry whilst playing.
I love the tingling sensation in my body after playing and the anxiety before playing, feeling my heart starting to race and my breath getting faster. Then when I take of my clothes my breath starts to slow down again, there is a sort of a tranqulity to it, perhaps a ritual?
Getting on the bench or whatever is used there is sort of a calm over me. I feel like everything is going to be perfectly okay. That there is no reason to worry, I'm in good hands, I know I can trust the person I am playing with.
When then first stroke lands on me I usually gasp for air as it is both unexpected AND expected, the sensation overfloods my system completely. I get into a state of mind. I don't really know where I am or what I am doing rather I live for and love the sensation of what is being done to me. I usually smile to myself. After a while that strokes become harder and harder, some so hard that it's on the verge of being too much but doesn't cross that line. It's those hard strokes that help me get over the edge, they make me gasp for air and struggle, they make me push myself further, till I can't fight myself anymore and I can't but start crying. Ohh, the sweet release of crying. All my worries, all the hurt, everything that has been bothering me up till this point gets released. I cry till there is nothing left to cry about. There is nothing on my mind anymore.
A hand strokes over my hair and a voice whispers in my ear asking if I am okay. I try to smile but it's too hard at this moment. I am sobbing and just trying to get my head straight to reply. The hands run over my body where it has been marked and shivers run through my body.
My eyes are clouded but I try to stand up, or even sit up. Every little move is difficault to preform as my limbs don't want to do what I am trying to tell them to do. I am off with the fayes!
I get warm caring hug and I am urged to have some sugar and something to drink. I am cared for and I feel safe. I let myself drift away and just enjoy the feeling of being. |
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I'm seriously having a fab time!
I've just moved to a new flat and my best friend in the world is living with me.
I've started college again and it doesn't seem to going to be going too bad :D
Though have to say... my room kinda looks like a library! Perhaps I should cut down on the book buying! |
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How good is MY life!
This summer I've been working with horses, as a co-runner of a Horse Rental.
I've had lots of chances to just have a good laugh!
I went to ROSKILDE FESTIVAL and had the BEST time!
I'm starting school again in the autumn after a break.
I'm HAPPY with my life.
I've been healthy.
I've had nearly nothing to worry about.
I've got the cutest dog in the world!
DAMN I'm HAPPY!
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SO! I've been busy! Am doing lots of photographing at the moment and actually doing a shoot in the morning and did one two days ago and more then likely one next week!
Hope you all have as much fun as I!
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For those of you who don't seem to get what I am.
I am what is often defined as a HARD player and an EDGE player.
Some of the things I enjoy the most are within the Edge play area, i.e needles, knives and breathplay.
I am NOT a sub or a slave. I am a MASOCHIST. I enjoy PAIN not to crawl around like a dog. I do bottom but I don't sub. Nothing will change that. No 'true' dom is going to make me sub as people are either submissive or not.
I trust very few people to play with me due to the nature of the play I am into. There are a couple of selected people out there that I DO trust with my life but when I play with them things are on MY terms.
So all offers of me becoming your slave girl or sub... please... just forget about it, and no I am not interested in being 'trained'. If I play it is because I WANT to play and no other reason.
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YAY! Not long till London now!! :D
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Annoyed. I'm so angry but I can't express it properly. I hate lies, I really do hate them!
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Still in Iceland working on my little photo projects... though visiting London next week as I've missed my friends lots.
Life is certainly being interesting these days.
Got reminded why I hate lies so much.
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Am having the 'best' day ever *sigh*
I hate insomnia!
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Am changing pictures on here so I might not be visible for a couple of days :)
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So! I'm finally going to be visiting London late next month!! I can't wait as I've missed my mates LOTS!!
*bounces*
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Okay, in a better mood then a week ago. Was going through a hard time.
V.
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Have a very Happy and Kinky New Year!
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Men can just FUCK off for a while!
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Life has changed a little here in Iceland as I've got a bit more responsibility at the moment... it's called Dominic Depill and is a 15 weeks old pup.
His owner had to get rid of him as her boyfriend wanted another pup! Silly bugger!
I've got this gem now and he's been a complete star! He's lovely bless him!
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It's a pain in the arse to update profiles!!
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Am in pain.
Training horses isn't just a walk in the park. One got scared when a dog barked last night. I'm now limping around, bruised and my lower back HURTS!
Still going riding today. I won't give up this easily.
V. |
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Some news.
I'm going to Iceland on Saturday for a while, I'll get back at some point, just not sure about the date yet.
Have some things to sort out over there and then I'll be back. I've no intentions to move back there... at least not till I'm much older ;)
Have a good day!
V.
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I never thought I'd say this...
But I am truly and really happy! I couldn't wish for much more then I have and I am greatful that I was found!
Thank You!
Yours, V.
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Time out this weekend.
Am running away up north the third time. Can't wait to get away from London for a moment.
Too bad that Dark is this weekend (and a friends birthday) but Dark is also next month and I'll meet my friend next week.
Got a job interview this afternoon as well. Don't think I'll get it but at least I can give it a go.
V.
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I'm SOOO fed up with looking for a new job! Just don't want to go back to Iceland with my tail between my legs. England has been SO much better for me then Iceland has been... at least here I can be JUST myself and I don't have to worry about peoples opinions on me because they really don't matter and if I go out my family doesn't get to hear things that they rather not hear.
V.
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Today... I'm going to get lost in the wild forrest behind my house (the garden) and try to clean it up a little. Thankfully there is sun outside!
And tonight I've got Putney munch if I bother to go!
V.
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Had a fab time at the munch last night!
Even got a newbie going... though I do admit that I though that he was going to bail when it was over an hour after getting a text saying 'On my way' ;) Sorry mate :P
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Thoughts about the Seven Deadly Sins and the Seven Virtues
Lust and Chastity
It use to be said that Lust was impure and Chastity was pure. In some ways that is true.
In my eyes lust is a driving force, something you will always have, there will always be something that you will lust for. I believe that before love there is lust, I don't believe in love at first sight I believe at lust at first sight. I don't believe in falling in love right away, I call it falling in lust.
I don't find lust impure, I find it something that will drive you to what you really want. I believe that the need for someone is pure. You don't have to be the Virgin Mary to be pure. Just don't be a slag. Don't let lust drive you into what you aren't sure about even if you want it at that moment... you might not want it tomorrow.
Gluttony and Temperance
I find that you can have self-control EVEN if you fall into temptation. That you give into a desire. There are limits to everything and I don't believe that Gluttony is good, sure, it is a sin but also... do you want to find yourself in the situation where you look into a mirror and don't even know the person that is staring right back at you?
Everyone has to have self-control, they have to know when to stop. People might try to advice but you might not listen, what about listening to yourself then... take a long good look inside.
Greed and Charity
You may want to own all the fancy cars. Have lots of money in your pockets. Have everything that your little heart desires. But when you have all you want... what are you going to do then? There is nothing more you want and you are bored of at least half of what you got... what are you going to do then?
Why not give away a little as it pays many-folds-over at least I think so. But then again I believe in Karma. I believe that if you never give anything away... even if you had EVERYTHING you would ever want you still wouldn't feel fulfilled, you would feel something is missing...
Sloth and Diligence
Being lazy hasn't helped anyone. If you don't make the effort how should you gain? You can't expect others to pick up the pieces after you. It is your job to makes sure that YOUR life will run as it should.
Your mother isn't always going to be there for you cleaning your laundry, making your food, reminding you to do your homework. Hell, if you don't have a bit of ethic and remember what is YOUR responsibility nobody is going to do it for you.
Wrath and Kindness
I've found that if I am angry I can't think straight. Why not just sit back, relax and remember why you got angry to begin with? There are many reasons to be angry, I find myself angry once in a while not knowing what really caused it. Lashing out at people that don't deserve isn't acceptable.
If you are angry just find a place where you can be yourself, anilize the thoughts you are having and try to sort them out. Try to be kind with those who don't deserve you lashing out at them. They aren't the cause of your anger.
Envy and Patience
Sure someone will always have something you want and you will envy them of it. What about just trying to be satisfied with what you have got yourself? I always try to remind myself that even if I had what that other person has I might not be happy with it anyway, if I had it I might want something else!
I always try to be happy with what I have as it is all I have. I feel that if I don't appreciate what I have I don't deserve it.
Pride and Humility
There is lots to be proud of, a whole lot. I would say that I am proud of many things but I also try to not rub it in others face. I may be very lucky to have some things knowing that others won't be able to have it... I just have to respect others as I want to be respected myself...
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Anyway... I'm done with this LONG weird rant.
V. |
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Seems like I've got a busy next couple of weeks!
V.
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Yesterday was a hard day but now I just have to carry on being myself and let myself smile and laugh. I can't always let the past get to me.
I am going to London Munch on Friday night and believe me I am going to have fun and hug all my friends that are there!
Be well.
And all of you that sent me messages on a hard day... thank you.
V.
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Today I've resisted
1) Drinking myself into oblivion
2) Sleeping through the whole day
3) Crying my eyes out (did a bit of that last night)
The reason I am not feeling good? Today it's three years since I lost someone very important. My best friend who passed in a car crash.
V.
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Wish me luck with tomorrow. Worst day of the fucking year.
V.
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FNEAH!
I need hugs of the people I care the most for now!
V.
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Had a FAB night last night!
Wish that there had been a few people there that couldn't attend but so is life!
Lots of laughs, a couple of bruises after playfighting... ohh how I love to playfight! It's just SO much fun!
Am feeling really happy.
Now I just want to go up north for a visit :P
V.
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Not long now till I have to get ready to go to Hades Dark! I can't wait to go there even though two friends I was hoping to meet up with there aren't able to go. Sucks but so is life.
Am going to be doing some kniveplay as I love it, just can't do anything about it, it's just SOO nice!
Anyways, should really go downstairs and colour my hair and get the things sorted that need be sorted!
V.
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Believe it or not I am a rather happy to be back from Iceland. Miss my family though and the couple of friends I had chance to meet. But I am glad to be back.
As well as when I was away I really did miss just not my privacy but also the fact when I am at home there isn't really a stable internet connection so there wasn't much keeping in touch with friends? *frowns*
Anyways, I'm alive, awake and going to Dark tonight!
V.
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My Lord!
I so do hate waking up early in the morning! Expecially when the person sleeping next to me (two year old nephew for the last two weeks) is still sleeping.
I am running myself a bath at this moment as I know that as soon as the rest of this household will wake up I will have no time for myself, as well as I know that in a couple of hours time I will be on my way to Reykjavík as my sister that is the mother of the two little boys I've babysat on my holiday arrived late last night.
I've almost completely packed but I am going back to England tomorrow, I can't say that I am going to be happy about saying bye to my loved ones here. But I've not been able to spend time with them really since I moved to England ten months ago.
Then again, I've missed my privacy in England and I can't wait to get that back for that. As well as being on a dial up probably hasn't helped. Not even my mobile works where I've been the last two weeks. I do love it but I need my fast connection and mobile to work now... am being VERY selfish!
Well, I am going to Dark on Saturday so I should have lots of fun!
Bye-a V. |
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Aye, this is me 'Eir' or actually Viskan, decided it was time to finally change and fix my profile. And as I couldn't change my username I just changed the whole lot.
Am still in Iceland on holiday but will be back on Friday, not bad not bad! Mainly as I've been away for two weeks.
V. |
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