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On Female Supremacy

I've always liked the thought of, and identified with, the idea of Female Supremacy. Although for a while I've found it difficult to reconcile with my other feelings. That is, my general thoughts on liberty, liberalism, libertarianism and freedom. I am a feminist (that can be a loaded term, but I won't dwell on it here) and believe in feminist values, but by extension that means that surely we're all equal, regardless of gender. So I've found it all a bit tricky to work out, but I think I have now.

For a start, I think the term 'equality' is a tricky one, and very loaded. Saying people are inherently 'equal' doesn't make sense really, for something to be 'equal', they need to be quantifiable and you need to know against what you're measuring the quantity. Human beings have no inherent measure like that, we're all multi-faceted. Not everyone is of equal intelligence (indeed, intelligence itself is multi-faceted and unquantifiable). In most senses, what we mean by equality, is that everyone has a fair-chance and equal opportunity in life, and should only be judged by things relevant to what it is you're doing in each separate circumstance. So if you're going for a job, it's purely you're suitability for that job, not you gender, or political leanings, or what your favourite sports team is (unless that's particular to the job).

Getting back to point (sort of). Basically, we all should have freedom of choice and self-determination, as far as that goes without affecting anyone else's freedom of choice and self-determination. OK, fantastic, so that's set. But how does Female Supremacy fit in with that? Isn't that saying some people are inherently 'supreme' (does that mean superior) over others? The way I have reconciled this is that I have a freedom of choice to place myself under someone's control, to recognise them as superior and give them power over me - so long as that person (i.e. my domme) accepts that and wishes for that too. I also, but default, personally, believe in Female Supremacy for myself. I don't impose that as a world-view in general, or force others to share that belief. It also doesn't mean I think all Females as Supreme- in all cases, that in itself is discriminatory. In a professional workplace it doesn't necessarily apply, as gender isn't relevant - everyone is just a colleague, and judged/treated based upon that fact alone. Therefore, in practise, I exhibit Female Supremacy when it comes to my relationship (or any Female I am talking to on the basis of forming some sort of relationship, or that I could form a relationship with or similar).

I'm not sure I've explained it particularly well, and one could write forever on the subject - mainly because a lot of it comes down to the syntax, the definition of words and terms that we use. But basically, I am a liberal, a libertarian, an egalitarian, a feminist and a Female Supremacist, all at the same time. Whatever any of that means.

ON Kinks, fetishes and interests

I have lots of kinks/fetishes/interests. Call them what you will. In the technical sense, I don't think I have a fetish, as technically a fetish is something that you cannot enjoy sex without, although that's not the way it's often used. There are things I'm really, really into though, but nothing that I can't do without at all.

The main thing for me though is I am submissive, I enjoy feeling submissive, or being made to feel submissive. I also like pleasing, so like to know I'm giving pleasure. What this means is I don't like forcing anything on my partner, and I don't really want them to do anything just to make me happy - I only really like it if they do. Part of the reason that pro-dommes, in that sense, don't offer anything for me (not that I'm making a judgement at all, just me personally the 'service' isn't of interest).

As an example, I'd find it really hot and arousing if my girlfriend made me strip, locked a collar round my neck and put a leash on it - It'd make me feel submissive and I'd enjoy it. But I wouldn't really be into it if she wasn't. Yet if she did that because she wanted to, because it made her feel dominant, brought her pleasure, or enjoyed exhibiting power like that or she desired it for whatever reason, then I'd enjoy that so much more than I could otherwise. I like feet, it's probably something that is closest to a 'fetish' for me, I appreciate the form of a feminine foot, if you will, maybe as one would a piece of art (this is getting weird), same as one appreciates, aesthetically, any element of female beauty. But for me, it's much more - I only get enjoyment really from feet when I'm giving pleasure. I love foot worship, and giving massages - but only if they're received with pleasure. I wouldn't enjoy it if the recipient was purely indulging a fetish of mine, and didn't like it herself.

Some things I like though

Rules. Although, as I've mentioned elsewhere, I'm perfectly capable for being independent, making decisions and being submissive and serving without being told what to do, I do like having enforced rules and being given firm instructions. I love having rules to abide by, knowing that I'm restricted in the way I can act in order to best please my Domme, obeying her to make her happy. Even if these are arbitrary (and sometimes even more because of that), just the fact that I've been told to do something, and me obeying pleases my owner - makes me really happy. This can be mundane things like what chores I should do and how, arbitrary things like certain things I should do or say just for her amusement or to catch me out, or things for her pleasure like being told I have to be naked in the house, or not being able to speak unless spoken to, or not being allowed to sit on furniture. It's exciting to have power exhibited, and control surrendered, and makes me feel submissive and whole - but it's not needed all the time.

On Dominance and submission

So I thought I'd put down some of my thoughts on D/s. These are just my thoughts (some of them, I've been thinking about this subject for years), and from my own point of view, my feelings on the matter and how I see it - I don't intend to write some general treatise on D/s, I'm not qualified for that and that'd probably run far too long anyway. This is just about me, my submission or views on it. At the moment, as best as I can put into words. I am open-minded, and like to consider myself an empiricist who is constantly reflecting, so my opinions may change, and indeed probably will, at least in some respects.

One can talk about D/s in different contexts/application, or at least two. There is BDSM in the bedroom, D/s 'play'/'sessions', which is more to do with sexual (not necessarily sex) acts or BDSM scenarios, which is something that can take place between anyone (consenting adults), who are either in some sort of relationship or not - this in itself is great to talk about, but I'm not going to here. There is probably lots to say about this, but ultimately it's playtime and not that interesting unless you're doing it (or maybe watching it, if that's your thing. Or talking about it with someone else, that is fun, particularly if it leads onto doing it).

What I'm talking about here is the other side of it, D/s as part of a relationship, day to day. That's not to say a relationship made up of constant whips-'n-chains-latex-and-leather-dominantrix-slave stuff, it's not really feasible to keep that up constantly (or at least I don't think it is, for me). There comes a time when a Domme sheds her thigh high patent leather boots and puts pyjamas on, and indeed, that's what it's like most of the time, ostensibly a 'normal' relationship (if there are any real norms of human interaction, we're all a weird bunch, even the 'normal' ones). D/s, but still with cuddles (preferably lots).

One of the better ways of describing it (that is, the sort of relationship I'd like) is a FLR - female led relationship (I really don't like much of the terminology of BDSM things - it always sounds a bit silly and contrite to me). IN a relationship, I'm perfectly capable of being 'the man' (I'm not going to get into gender stereotyping or what that really means, maybe I'll write another piece), I don't act constantly like a pushover sap, I am capable of pushing back, I am happy making decisions by myself for myself or for the couple. The difference being I put my partner number one, her needs come before mine (not the best way of putting that - perhaps it's more her needs *are* mine), she has the final call (or first call) on decisions, if she wants it. When she doesn't explicitly state what she wants, I try to do my best to anticipate what she wants or make the best judgement in order to do what would make her happy. I have always been like this in relationships, but perhaps not always recognised it. Now that I am truly cognisant of the fact, ideally I'd prefer a relationship where my partner has the same, compatible thoughts. I'd like my submission - and her dominance - to be recognised by us. Not necassarilly all the time overtly, but still a fact. I like power exchange, and surrending power to, and being ultimately under the control of, the woman whom I love, seems like the most perfect thing to me. This is what I am like in relationships anyway (looking back retrospectively I can see I was like that before in previous relationships, even if I was not truly conscious of it at the time), I'd love to have a relationship where my partner knew that, liked that, wanted it and desired it.

In practice, all this means is that in relationships I tend to, and want to, devote myself to my partner. I try to anticipate her needs, and do things to make her happy - ideally before she realises that's what she wants. I can't claim to be some perfect slave with no thoughts of my own - and indeed don't think I'd want to be (or want to be with someone who only wants that). I'm sure I'd have plenty of off-days, or slip ups, but I would like to be in a relationship that recognises that, and works to correct it. That is, if I don't do something right, I'm pulled up on it, although I'm happy to make decisions independently, I'd love to have enforced rules and firm instructions too, and maybe be punished (outside of a BDSM play context - more like domestic discipline) if I don't measure up to standard.

I am certainly a service-oriented submissive too, I really do like doing things for my partner. I take pride in doing things so she doesn't have to, and making her life easier. I have always been like this, but I think one of the things that has been lacking is for that to be recognised - I don't mean in a superficial sense, I don't need recognition or praise for doing the dishes, I mean that my submission is recognised and understood, and my girlfriend/owner accepts and enjoys that. To clarify - I certainly don't want thanks for doing things, I see it as my place. So yes, it means that I do the dishes, laundry, cleaning and ironing, and I'm more than happy doing so (well, I'm not really, I hate doing dishes. But I love doing things so my girlfriend doesn't have to, and see it as one of the supreme acts of submission).

I am going to start being a bit more active on here when I can (work permitting).

I have complained a lot about all the timewasters and those that ignore me, and think it may be that they think I am one of the timewasters, as I do not really 'look' much different.

Therefore I am going to be more active, make my profile up to date (when I get round to it), try to look as real as I am and stand apart from the crowd somewhat. As I assure you all, I am genuine and not a timewaster...

...But they all say that!

So I have added a new picture, but it is rather blacked-out to remove distinguising feature- call me paranoid, but hey. I am not really hiding anything or ashamed of my life style as such, some of my friends know about it to varying extents, but for work and just generally privacy I cannot afford, and do not want, my face to be out there to much in the public domain with this. Like I say though I am not ashamed or shy ;) so will happily exchange proper face pics with people, I just do not want to post them here- some people do, some don't.

Like I noted in the main profile text my whole profile needs a huge going over and revising (not updated in a long while), as I am a little older, perhaps wiser and a tad more experienced. Also lost a bit of weight, trimmed out somewhat (and working on more), so my main pic will have to go! Still deciding on whether to have a semi-naked one on there at all, or just save them for private messages. Certainly will not have 'intimate' pictures on my profile- cock pics on profile are very crude!