twistedreality

I'm nervous. A mistress wants to use hypnosis and train me to be diapered at work? Currently I'm using an "arousal to submission" hypnosis track and I'm finding each listening increases both.

A story idea?...

She had been unusually playful and in a good mood. She had not teased him so seductively since they were dating. Now the years had passed. Her hand rubbing his crotch she kisses him deeply. Then, she tells him, “write what you want sexualy on a note and fold it. I will do the same. We will cut a deck of cards for it. The winner get’s their wish. Do you agree to the stakes and the game and no backing out?

Of course he answered yes. She cut the cards and she won. She knew him well and knew he had asked for oral sex, without reading his note. She led him to the bedroom and pushed him down on the bed. “You can win too”, she said as she slipped the note from his hand. He tried to have her pause, as he wanted his confidence and the extra edge that comes in that little blue pill.

She sucked him and toyed with him. He only became more frustrated as he struggled for the full erection. She stood, handed him her IOU and walked to the medicine cabinet, took his pill bottle of Viagra and slipped it into her pocket. “Now, I am in control of your sex. If you are good and obedient, in a few days I will consider giving you one. If you screw up, there will be days added”. She poured some oil on his hand and ordered him to stroke his poor cock, knowing he couldn’t reach the peak as she straddled his face for an oral orgasm.

That was a short but sweet experiment. Life goes on. Yet, having stopped the hypnosis training, there is some residual which will fade over time.

Financial domination? No! I will exchange items of value, my pride, ideas, experiences, and my imagination.

So, a lesbian who has no interest in males seems safe. A little chat and a request to do some hypnosis. A week of tying arousal to submission seems like an interesting experiment. How wrong I am. Now, 2 weeks later and having traded a release of my arousal, I am definitely in her grasp

The dominant lady I was serving; online;  suddenly passed away. This sudden removal has left me quite aware of the intensity of the power exchange. I've had some come and go that did not leave me feeling this way. It's strange to have this nagging desire to do things for someone who is no longer there and this craving to be controlled.

After 5 days in panties, with alternating days of stroking for 2 minutes every hour, without release, my mind is in  a fog and my balls are blue

It seems the number of complaints about the males is going up. What these  ladies probably are not aware of, is the number of scams, girls requiring you to join some pay cam account, etc. is also going up.

No I wont join your cam-account website. No I wont send you money. I can verify myself if requested. I understand the need to stay safe and protect yourself. If your interested in intelligent discourse or the sharing of thoughts, ideas, and experiences please contact me. Otherwise

So, I have been delving more into the hypnosis. I received a file, which I was asked to listen to every day for a week. It was to tie arousal and submission and have one increase the other. Now I find myself sitting here in a very twisted state of mind and nobody to submit too. I know why I feel like this but I cant seem to stop it. Im seeing sides of things and people I have never imagined....blush

When I first started this journey, the differences between sub and vanilla were small, but the were large in significance. For example, wearing a pair of panties under my work pants. Looking back, that seems like such a minor detail. Yet it was a big mental experience.

Now, I find irony in so much of this. Though my submissive training has taken me so much further than I could comprehend, I find irony in that I have more control in those now seemingly mild situations. I am aware that I am wearing panties under my clothes, and I know what it symbolizes. Yet, I no longer blush at her mention of them and I find it easier to have unforced conversations with other males.

On the same hand, I find that things I thought were hard limits are no longer. I guess it's conditioning. I can stand on the tight rope longer. Yet when I fall into the submissive abyss, I slip into sub space much more quickly.

I have traded control of somethings for control of others. Yet, I have also traded control for lack of control. The more I think I am in control the more I realize I am not. Now I wonder if I have traded the control or the control has been traded for me.

Well, it is a slow day at work and so, I think I will call it a day at 11AM this morning. Perhaps some boating for the rest of the day. That is unless some domme has a better idea...

Last night I had an extremely vivid and detailed dream. I even woke up and went right back into it. When I awoke this morning, all I could do is think about putting it into writing. Of course one event led to another and now its in the afternoon, some of the memory has faded and I find my ability to translate my thoughts into writing

does not match the dexterity of my over-active imagination. What a shame, that dream was the stuff of a master bdsm porno movie.

In all my journey, down this path of bdsm, I have come across the terms "hard limits"," no limits" and "pushing your limits". I always dealt with them automatically in the terms of the context. At times, in the depths of my mind, those seemingly vauge limits appear as large as a mountain and as different as earth and wind. And, often I find myself at the edge of a limit, about to stumble off the edge; not always pushed, but often a stumble has led me there. It is at these moments I have to concsciously not a truly hard limit). It is these little falls that clear the mind as if in an accident. Time slows and I see it clearly realizing there are many staircases to the limit, all are different ways of ariving tthere than the path I imagined in my mind; variations on a theme. In that split second, I confirm in my mind that this is a softer limit and stumble again. She hasn't pushed me, but walked me to the edge. Maybe she nudged me, maybe she tripped me. I look back at the flight of stairs behind me. There is a moment of panic. yet I may stumble further. It is these variations on a theme that haunt me. I stand at the bottom of the stairs; sometimes a bit bruised; and ponder that what once was thought of as a hard limit, was actually a softer one, yet no less difficult. And, I ponder that the fact I have passed that limit once; even if only briefly; it is now an even softer limit than before.

I see many posts where people are curious about this, or curious about that. Yet, I have not seen any private inquiries. I doubt they are curious. Perhaps there should be a "Fleeting thought" catagory.  If curiosity killed the cat, I want to know "what was the cat curious about?"

Money? My time, knowledge, imagination, mind and experience are what I have to share. To me those are of great value. If you don't ask me for money I won't ask you. 

I hate to admit it, but there is just not much going on lately. I get the occasional email from a scammer and now I'm suspicious of all. But I am aware that the louder she complains, the more likely she is a scammer.

I just have to ask, "What is with all these "pro domme's". What happened to continuing education and "shop talk" to help increase your knowledge and experience?

I read here and there that people want to intruduce partners to some type of erotic play; be it role-play, bdsm, etc. I was introduced creatively and have used the same technique myself, with great success. Everyoone has those discussions where someone asks, "want to bet?" or "I bet ya" there is your opening. Start genly with something easy, that they will get some pleasure from. Then, those bets later become IOU's, where the bet is known. Then you proceed to open-ended IOU's. An open ended IOU is simply that; an IOU with no known or determined value at the time of the bet. The value/or cost can be determined later when the time is right. They also turn a game of cards into something more intense. I bet you a token "our term for an IOU" that this works.

As I have indicated previously, I continue to dabble with some intense and erotic hypnosis. My latest experience has taught me the power of linking an objectionable act or feeling to pleasure. It leaves your head spinning trying to grasp the irony.

Lately I've been pondering the possibilities of some hypnosis ideas. Imagine a stop smoking session, which helps immensly, but also makes you aware that if you are really craving ..., a butt plug will trigger the cravings to subside. Of course, one would have to make the act of giving in to the craving for tobacco have a far more embarassing outcome. The more I consider the subject, the more twisted ideas I come up with.

The power of a smell, sound or taste often triggers distant memories and feelings. This is a very poweful tool in hypnosis. I am considering making a file with baby powder. Imagine a white powder which is seemingly harmless having an effect like a drug. It could trigger thoughts, actions, feelings of many types and twists. Imagine being in a store, catching a whiff of powder and immediately getting so horny you must go masturbate. Of course, getting that horny is one of the milder possibilities. And yet, if you sprinkled yourself lightly with it (assuming it had some triggerable affect) no one would suspect a thing.

The more I chat with people on here the more I am referred to as an enigma. I hadn't thought about it in years. But, in my younger years I often had girls tell me that I was a "true gemini" (the twins). Not being into horoscopes, I did not realize fullly what they meant.

What is it that makes me such an enigma? Though the symptoms would be that I am an in-control person who loves the struggle of giving up control, my ability to be playful in the most serious of tasks, that inspite of my upbringing and education I find a mountain top is better than a 4 star motel. The cause of this is quite easy. I seek knowledge and to understand polarity. I like to pick the minds of liberals inspite of my conservative views. I am curious about things I dont like, I want to see the whole picture and understand that even though you did see what you saw, it might not have happened just so.

Im still blushing over the last post. But, I wanted to post something a little more about me, so that last post is not your impression. I'm open to all points of conversation. I do have a fair amount of hypnosis experience and would be willing to discuss that as well.

Post after post from the females on this site indicates they are overwhelmed with responses. So, I typically refrain from contacting them. If you have an interest in talking with me, drop me a note. I will respond.

If gambling and making deals was good, I would not be blushing beet red in a thick wet cummy diaper, while sucking a pacifier when Im supposed to be working.

I've been away for a while. Everyone needs a little vanilla time, now and then. I have been back for about 2 weeks and was  trying to think of something interesting  or provokative to post.  I guess I spent too much time in Vanilla  time, as my mind is blank.

I do notice a trend though. It seems  there are many more scammers and pro dommes on here. And the message boards are getting more vanilla.

Also, I have read several post of people complaining about old forum posts being reactivated. If you spend so much time here that you are annoyed by a newbie, a new question on an old post, or a slgihtly different point of view,ctivates an old post, I suggest some vanilla time for you. Perhaps doing some charity work and helping others.

Glad to be back...

It is amazing how you can grow to accept things you thought were impossible, under the tutelage of a domme who can think out of the box.

It's been a long  and slow walk down a path I had seen, but not turned down. At times I feel anxiety and a bit of fear over the changes. I find myself breaking away to reasses my position. Yet, the ingrained addictions and conditioning lead me back.

At first, I was nervous with every step. Now, what made me nervous seems almost normal. My self consciousness has faded, since I am very aware of the inability of the masses to notice the subtleties of my requirements. Almost normal...I teeter between the feeling of normalcy and being aware that It is far from normal.

-Thinking outside the box...just some input from my own experiences.

-I think many dominants limit themselves by not "thinking outside the box". Usually, creative thinking keeps the sub off balance and susceptible. I read the profiles here and find they confirm my suspicions.

-When I'm in sub-space, my mind spins with images, visions and possibilities. I don't consider these things fantasies. I think they are in fact my mind attempting to get a grasp on the reality of what is happening. Perhaps my mind is addressing dark fears. Yet, in my experiences, I have seldom had my thoughts probed and in many ways that's lucky for me. But consider the lost possibilities for the dominant.

-If your about power exchange and domination, can you find some aspects to on-line with a married person? Even I, a sub, have considered the power of twisting someones wife's mind and creating some erotic conflict. The couple might even benfit, if done with consideration.

-I have seen some people mention hypnosis being used in bdsm. This is another good example of "thinking outside the box". Most respond to these post from a perspective of their limited knowledge and preconcieved notions regarding this. No, its not an easy route. But, if hypnosis can be used to relax, help stop smoking, and in therapy, what other uses can it have? Again, I doubt anyone will probe my mind concerning this and my experiences with hypnosis.

-Now for a big slap in the face. Many state they don't like diapers. I agree with them, in the general sense of adult babies and being changed by AB mommies. But, what about the psychological or humiliating power of being diapered? Now there's a chastity device with potential! What a good punishment it could be to make your sub purchase and diaper themselves for work, since you caught them masturbating without permission. The list is endless, especially considering they are your sub, so you dont have to change them and you have the power of reminding them of their status. It's hard to feel powerful when diapered.

-My suggestion to you all, dominants and subs, is do some reading. Read some things you are uncomfortable with and you may find some "out of the box" ideas that will take you where you want to go. Random googling is a great tool. And; while your at it, google your subs mind.