TheSecretDom

Definition of the difference between a masochist and a sadist.

The masochist says "Hurt me, hurt me please".

And the sadist says "Get yer sorry arse over here, worm".

I think that's how I heard it...

A certain amount of incredulity has been expressed regarding my weekend activities, so I feel that some further details may be useful.

I was feeling of a cruel demeanour so I intended to make this the most gruelling and tortuous session she had experienced so far. Once stripped of her outer garments to reveal the full latex lingerie in which she had driven the two hours to meet me, the chains that had been conditioning in my fridge for a couple of days were wrapped around her body, a job made much easier by the fixing points afforded by the tight leather wrist and ankle cuffs. The obligatory gag made binding her into the comfy chair a less noisy process than it would otherwise have been. And then came the ultimate torture...

I played her a Grand Prix DVD: pre-race coverage, the race itself, and the pundit discussion afterwards. So as not to make this punishment too vicious, I chose the 2007 European race. You remember, that's the one at the Nurburgring one where it started to rain just as the lights went out, Raikonnen missed the pit lane, five cars crashed out after aquaplaning at turn 1, Hamilton carried on after being recovered from the gravel, Winkelhock led the race for Spyker before his car died and then the rain came on again just before the end, but not for long enough to make Kovaleinen's tyre strategy work well. A really good race.

Oh it was fun! In fact she giggled and moaned in pleasure all the time it was on, although that may have had something to do with the remote control vibrator I had inserted earlier.

Next time I'll use extra-strength batteries and we'll see if she can cope with the 2011 Canadian GP :)

But the only thing in life more thrilling than anticipation is a spectacular actuality!

There is very little in this life more thrilling than the anticipation of an imminent tryst with a very submissive lady.

I'll be back on Sunday - be good.

Does anyone have a DIY head examination kit I could borrow?

I've just knocked back an approach from a 28-year old with sexy ankles.

With all the problems recently around CM/CS and the various comments about competing sites, perhaps we need a consumer's guide to kinky contact.

Whipadvisor, anyone?

Why would a lady become an admirer yet not respond to emails?

Answers on a postcard or sealed-down envelope, please.

Welcome back CM - or is it CS?

Or CM@CS?

Well, how about that? One lady has been sufficiently intelligent and tenacious to unravel the riddle of the profile picture.

Well done, now please bend over so I can present your prize.

OK, not all of them.

Are all Americans rude?

A soi-disant sub sends me a very curt mail, to which I reply asking for a more polite communication. This provokes a foul-tempered tirade and an instant block. Rude and cowardly, not a very attractive combination.

British ladies, on the other hand, are lady-like.

I realise that here on CM I am (virtually) surrounded by people of many sexual and societal persuasions and I am happy to accept them all - YKIOK and all that. I own to some unorthodox views of my own.

But even I think that a bloke in a dress is an unexpected Eurovision winner (and yes, I do know about Dana International).

What would Katie Boyle have made of it?

Oh, Eurovision :(

I think that was the same song sung 26 different ways. Bring back Lulu!

Or Lordi.

Eurovision!!

I can't stand football, but it's Saturday, it's 12:00, so it's Radio Scotland and Off the Ball -  The most petty and ill-informed football show on radio!"

Wonderful!

Let me satisfy your curiosity.

It's always very flattering to pick up an admirer, even when she is too shy to actually get in touch.

Come on you tart, pluck up come courage!

An unexpectedly long weekend beckons. Sorry ladies, but you'll just have to keep yourselves aroused until Tuesday.

Hope you have fun...

I've just had a knock-back on the basis that I had no profile photograph.

I thought I had...

Day 1 of a new voyage - who knows in which port I will dock my craft...