Weak and weary from this place my heart aches

This life it just takes

Like shards of glass piercing my soul

How long will

I last 

Can I

Hold on

Some days are filled with such anger and rage

I certainly don?t wish to catch a case

I?ve been held to long in this mental cage

Too gentle to kind

This wondering mind

Loosing time in a rapid pace

Holding tight

Holding fast

Here it comes another blast

Duck Dodge Swerve

Twist and turn

Wondering mind

Still left disturbed

Good Evening Dwayne ,

My friend or at least I hope that we are ,

I will ask you to  read this or you have the  choice to delete this e-mail or read on .

Because t theres a few things I'd like to share with you.nice loving ,not so nice but still carring , thoughts

I know your a Wonderful warm ,loving carring man when you choose to be but its just a convience for you as I've seen of late  your very intellegent,wise and gentle  and my favorite geeky Dom  possibly my favorite mistake .

I's been a great honor and treasure to have the oppurtunity to work with you to learn and grow from our relationship , I know at times life throws us curve balls this is certainly has been one of thoses times.

I  really miss our friendship and our comfortableness with one another . But  I  know when its times to throw the game its bottem of the ninth man on 1st and 3rd and theres 2 outs  2 strikes and 2 balls you swing and you miss  game over . I tried my best but I know when I've lost life goes on and another season comes and goes .

But  even if this is one of the hardest things I've had to do

I'd like to thank you  for your friendship your openness your love and respect and everything you've done for me , it has all been greatly appreciated and worth the acknowledgement .

You've made my life a wonderful experience as well as a  living hell  for loving you has been my biggest challange  but I regrettably fold .

As you know I've been getting out and enjoying my life as we both know it. taking risks and chances but trying new and wonderfully different things .

I'm honestly beginning to like me again,I'm worth more then I've given myself credit threw the years

I'm loving me once again and love who I'm becoming as I grow and mature into my true self learning new things about me

I am beautiful even if I'm a diamond in the rough and I' m worth loving and cherrishing there still is some worth to my existence.  even if this diamond is'nt quiet polished to her complete shine .

Reggie told me once that when I quit blaming myself  and  love myself only then can I break the chains that bind me  no matter how I craved being in those chains,  it would be a glorious rebirth

I'm begining to understand what he was saying . what happened to us can't be change and we can't be fixed  but we can move on and learn from it no  matter how bad or how sweet it was.

I'd like to thank you for the weekend you didnt show it helped me break those chains , it helped me open up to a whole new world of possiblities .I  dont feel as if I'll die a lonely bitter spinster but a beautiful polished diamond  grown to love and serve as I was meant to .

You will still  be that one person who knows me better then myself  and thats ok but its time for me to give another that chance and I'm so looking forward to just that .

I've  excepted what has happened to me in the past and I'm willing to move on and grow from that experierence not saying thoses demons won't rear there ugly heads from time to time

I'm just not scared of them any more I embrace them to bring it the fuck on  I'm ready this time .

I hope one day you'll be able to do the same  and be happy and love yourself as you know you should be loved . I'll always be a friend and a ear to burn if need be 

I just felt you had the right to know how important you've been in my life learned lessons

be well and know your still beautiful to me  and always will be  my friend

                          Love is so bitter sweet  Legs