|
Moi: I wish Rose could have met you >.< might have helped loads. As in showed her how to deal with me.
Jennifer: Lol xD Maybe tho sometimes I don't know how to deal with you.
Moi: Since when? XD you either hit me, swear at me or tell me you love me. Or a combination of some or all of the above.
Jennifer: LOL XD That summed it up pretty well actually. |
|
|
|
|
What the HELL is my fetish?
I LOVE strippers, porn stars and cam girls. I really want one as a girlfriend - a big part IS likely because the ones I've known have actually been both really nice and rather awesome people (read: nice, caring and bonkers), but I've always loved the idea of them as well, I love the idea of men beyond count paying money just to ogle at her.. but then at the end of the day its ME she chooses to come home to. So what the hell is my fetish? Am I a squirrel who needs to show off his nuts to reaffirm his self worth? (Is there a scientific word for that?) Am I a cuckold? |
|
|
|
|
Mmm, not been on here for a while, forgot my password. Mmm, not much to say really.. no BDSM fun of late, tho I do have a new acquaintance who has very bindable looking boobs! Not sure as to whether she's kinky or no, tho she does appear to munch rug - if the way she was checking out all the skirt that passed our table en-route to the bogs when we went out for a curry last week was any indication :P
Random amusing trivia: I've been spending weekends at my exes of late, both due to lonelyness and to help her with her offspring, weekend before last she woke me up at 8am (I was sleeping on the floor in the living room) saying "Can you take the baby for a few hours please, he's your son.. I know we never had sex, it was an immaculate conception" :P |
|
|
|
|
Mother: "Whats the BLOODY LIGHT on for!?"
Moi: "You'll never guess!"
Mother: "..."
Moi: "I turned it on so I could SEEEE!"
Mother: "For fuck sake!"
(It was the landing light, I needed it to a) find the ketchup in mothers room and b) find the control panel for the heating in the bathroom) |
|
|
|
|
Mother: "I forget, did you say you'd invited someone for Christmas?"
Moi: "Well I was thinking of inviting Emily if she doesn't stab me before then.."
Mother: "Well the house rules stand: No stabbing people or threatening violence, or I shall get annoyed and start hitting people with my stick." |
|
|
|
|
Wow, there's a first for everything I suppose, I suppose it had to happen eventually. Yes dear readers: AN ACTUAL POST RELATED TO BDSM! Yes, pick up your jaws.
I have a new friend, I messaged her on on Wednesday since she was in Berkshire, single and into BDSM play, turns out she's a right geek: Game of Thrones, Vampire: The Masquerade, Warhammer.. we got on so well that I actually met her on Sunday night, actually hung out for 7 hours, and even more amazingly.. SHES STILL TALKING TO ME!
Haven't had BDSM fun yet however there's talk of possibly having some tomorrow (tho I may have to go look after a suicidal friend), she's just said: "..Then when I come back through you can be ready for me, unless I have to tidy the toys up in which case you can pounce me as I finish that" |
|
|
|
|
I went to Newbury to meet a college friend for coffee yesterday, we wound up talking about tattoos, eventually going onto tattoos of wings on peoples backs, to which she said: "I don't need a tattoo, I have wings already.. I told my doctor I don't but I lied as I wanted him to certify me as sane" its rather disturbing that there are people more out there than me :P |
|
|
|
|
Do you think.. "I'm sorry. I'll delete your number now. I hope you and Greg are very happy together and that you don't give him too many strains of AIDS." is a bit.. harsh? |
|
|
|
|
Researchers at the University of Westminster have found that a coupon or free gift with a jar of Marmite or a loaf of Kingsmill bread gave them just as much excitement as the pornography. Jeez, Westminster makes Milton Keynes sound exciting.. |
|
|
|
|
Moi: "If you get the stuff off your chest it wont be as stressful"
Donna: "Are you sure?"
Moi: "Why do you think I tell people all about my problems?"
Donna: "Because your an attention whore?"
Moi: "Nono, thats why I dress like an idiot and make inappropriate comments" |
|
|
|
|
Dear demented cow, I know I'm an aggravating lil shit even when your not making Mount Doom's out of molehills (I know I sometimes come over as hero-worshiping you but I don't, I just think your boobs outweigh your flaws). Its been a pretty hard month, I've not been even remotely suicidal but this have been so bad my mother has actually been worried I might be (something shes never been worried about before, not even when I had cancer), so if you still have one iota of care for me I could really use some friendship about now..
^ random musing, too long for a txt thankfully or I might have sent it, the original draft said merits instead of boobs, but after the third read-through of the sentence I couldn't help myself :P |
|
|
|
|
*sigh* I'm not really a music person, well, I listen to lots, but I rarely like more than 2 songs from any band. For this reason (and my social phobia) I've never gone to the Reading Festival despite living in Reading, however I always feel somewhat left out.. especially this year as there appears to be a disproportionate number of succulent thigh'd lasses wandering around in wellies and very short shorts. |
|
|
|
|
ARGH! I accidentally bought some sleeveless t-shirts yesterday! I NOW LOOK LIKE A GAY AUSTRALIAN!! |
|
|
|
|
For some reason one of our cats - Rocky - really REALLY wants to sit on me, he wont sit by me or even against me, hes got to be ON me, if I try and move him so hes even half off me he goes and sulks on the landing for a bit before coming back and jumping back on. Thing is, I'm likewise overreacting to rejection at the mo, I kinda made a pass at my best friend and she was majorly not interested, then I discovered another friend (who I've flirted with but I doubt she'd want a relationship either) has a bf.. and then I got blocked by someone for no apparent reason, so I'm feeling kinda.. OOOF Rocky's back..
|
|
|
|
|
Bloody daylight savings! I don't have to get up for another hour! GRRRR! |
|
|
|
|
Whilst I was walking home from town yesterday - after having walked about 12 miles and had 2 pints of cider (which affected me more than the 6 pints I had at a halloween party a few years ago) some guy asked if I had a pound or two so he could buy some bread and milk.. I had some change in my pocket so I gave him the £2 coin (which is one of the coolest coins ever minted btw), it wasn't until about a mile later that I wondered whether he was truly skint.. for one thing he said he was going for milk, but he was indian - and I recall a bit of (japanese) research which found that the majority of non-caucasians are lactose intolerant from the age of 2 (which really makes "lactose intolerant" a racist term, it really should be "lactose tolerant" for us pasty freaks who retain the ability to digest it), of course its entirely possible that he doesn't know it and has the resultant bowel problems. However at this point my speculation was ended by a realisation that it really didn't matter, I heard a "ka-ching" and pictured the Fallout 3 "you have gained karma" notice :oP |
|
|
|
|
Stupidity: I spent Saturday night at my place, then yesterday I messaged my friend Lucy (who I've been trying to see for weeks) and suggested we go for a walk by the river since the weather was nice and she was wanting to lose weight. Amazingly she said yes! But she wasn't free till 2pm and it was 11am.. so I decided to walk back to me mums in Tilehurst to feed the cats then walk to Caversham.. which is about 7 miles total :oS Walked about 3 miles or so with Lucy before we wound up at the Purple Turtle where we watched the unaired Buffy pilot on me laptop.. then I walked back to my mothers place which was over 4 miles away.. for a total of about 15 miles walking. They say no pain, no gain.. I musta gained loads! urk.. |
|
|
|
|
Compliments!
I met a friend from myspace forthe first time yesterday, I must say she paid me one of the best compliments there is, as I was tying up her boobs she uttered "Oh. So you have done this before.." which in fact I hadn't, I'd just seen plenty of porn of it :oP
I shant give a blow by blow description at this juncture, but I shall say I am now mildly experienced in:
Breast bondage.
Breast slapping.
Spanking.
Beating with a riding crop (boobs and ass - tho my aim needs practice).
Fucking with a dildo so hard she told me to stop and go get the ballgag because she was afraid the neighbours would call the police (can you say SCREAMER!!!). |
|
|
|
|
I've just had an expensive 24 hours! Last night one of my boots split so I had to order some more (to be fair they don't really owe me anything - I've been wearing them day in and day out for a year), and then this morning I woke up to find my mobile phone had died! Went and got a cheap replacement from Tesco but I'm not happy! every single phone they had - from bargain basement to top of the range - had keys designed to be used only by anorexic teenaged girls with toothpicks for fingers! Don't get me wrong, anorexic teenaged girls do have their uses, but I don't want to have go find one whenever I want to sent a text message! :oP |
|
|
|
|
Okay, many of you know I am forever buying random crap, and many have even said as such to my face - now, usually this is with regards to things like granny blankets or out of print boardgames or utterly random junk.. but I've had THREE people say it to me because I bought a teapot!??! What do you people use for making tea when you don't want to carry the kettle round with you?!?! |
|
|
|
|
Obligatory Off-topic stuff: I was awakened this morning by a bang-bang-banging at the door, whahey I cried to myself! The boardgame I ordered from America must be here needing to be signed for! Was it buggery, twas a £6 teapot from Birmingham!
On the flip side.. wtf is it with all of the subs all of a sudden?! I've gotten talking to one in Reading on Faceparty, and another messaged me on Myspace (giving me her phone number no less!) |
|
|
|
|
"And lo in the final decade of the 2nd Millenium did God set a plague upon the world of men, and that plague was known as Alex" ~ Annoyances 24:7 |
|
|
|
|
Oddness: I am a sex obsessed perv, but on the other hand I am also frightfully naive, eg: I just searched ebay for cup sets, and was wtf'd to get bras.. |
|
|
|
|
Urgh.. I have just had an AWEFUL week, I've spent it quite possibly being the illest I have ever been: technically the food poisoning my mother gave me when I was 15 was technically worse (although I had the satisfaction of knowing she gave herself it too..) but that lasted less than 24 hours - after almost 4 days of diarhea I am positively joyous of my newfound constipation! |
|
|
|
|
Whoah :-O There IS such a thing as karma! Its a friend of mines birthday on Saturday, and she really wanted a poofy dress to wear but couldnt afford one, I had some spare cash so I bought her one she wanted.. 4 hours later a rather pretty 20 year old masochist who lives 10-20 minutes WALK away messaged me on my dodgy myspace!!!!! |
|
|
|
|
Oh dear, a sortof friend of mines sons hamster died today and she doesn't know what to do about it.. I gave her three suggestions:
Option 1: Buy a replacement the same colour and don't tell him.
Option 2: Tell him the hamster was an illegal immigrant and has fled to Grimsby to avoid being deported.
Option 3: Tell him it died in glorious battle and has gone to Valhalla, then get him to make a wooden boat so they can give it a viking burial in the river Kennet.
|
|
|
|
|
2008 - HAVE YOU:
Kissed someone new?
No.. was kissed by someone new tho!
Done something you've regretted?
Wish I hadn't fucked up college or deleted Jess..
Did you break up with anyone?
Not really, I did delete Jess of Facebook, but its not like she was replying to my messages as it was..
Did you meet anyone special?
Didn't MEET anyone, but made a few new online friends.
Were involved in something you'll never forget?
College.
Visited a different country?
Nope, hell I don't think I even left the county :oS
Cooked a gross meal?
Oh yes! My boxing day beef brisket was aweful!
Lost something important to you?
Does breakages count? I broke my camera :o(
Got a gift you adore?
Not really
Tripped over a coffee table?
Dont think so, if we had one I'd almost certainly have fallen over it tho :oP
Dyed your hair?
Nope (never have)
Went to a party?
Nope
Read a great book?
One or two (George RR Martin books -forget which tho)
Saw one of your favorite bands/artists live?
Not really a music person, tho aledgedly Madness were playing Newbury Racecourse - I did consider going to that.
Did you make any new friends this year?
As already noted - some new online.. oh wait! Helen! I've met Helen twice. (got talking to her last January)
Did you dislike anyone?
No-one springs to mind, well other than Matthew and Lindsay but thats pretty much ongoing
Grow apart from anyone?
Yeah :o( Kerry barely speaks to me at all now.
Do you have any regrets when it comes to your friendships?
Wish I could have kept Kerry interested in talking to me
2008: Your BIRTHDAY!?
Did you have a cake?
I think so.. I seem to recall asking Mother why she didnt get Thorntons Fudge Cake instead.
Did you have a party?
Nope.
Who was the first to say happy birthday to you?
No idea.
Did you get any presents?
I dont know.. I have a tendency of getting my birthday present from mother either a few months late or a few months early, which makes it hard to remember what it was - certainly nobody else got me anything.
2008: All about YOU
Did you change at all this year?
Well I started wearing jeans.
Did you get your hair cut?
Um, maybe once :oP
Did you change your style?
Nope
Did you get good grades?
:o( no, fucked up so badly they wont let me back
Did you have a job?
Does bonafide mental defective count?
Did you Drive?
nope
Did you own a car?
Nope
Did anyone close to you give birth?
A college friend and an online friend both disgorged towards the end of the year, not sure I'd describe either of them as close - I certainly wish I were closer to both, er, tho not close enough they ask me to babysit! :oP
Did you move house at all?
Nope.
Did you go on any vacations?
Does camping in the back garden for 6 months count?
Would you change anything about yourself now?
Of course I would.
2008: Wrap UP:::
Do you think 2009 will top 2008?
Dear God I hope so, don't want to go through that again.. |
|
|
|
|
Donna: "The original Doctor Dolittle"
Donna: "I used to love that film when I was little"
Moi:
*imagines you as a victorian wench*
*on your hands and knees in a cobbled alley, taking it doggy style from a man in a waistcoat and top hat who holds a knife to your throat*
Donna: "That's one of your better imaginings"
|
|
|
|
|
Meh, lifes been fairly shit of late dear readers, hence the lack of updates.. its still fairly shit, but I've distracted myself by playing Fallout 3 :oP
On another subject, did you know the house keeper in the remade of The Parent Trap went on to appear in a film called Farm Sluts? |
|
|
|
|
Mother: "I'm going to the kitchen"
Me: "to put the food on or to check it?"
Mother: "To check it!"
Me: "Oh good show"
Mother: "I'll let you know if its burnt, we can have a bonfire in the garding. HA!"
Its possible I maybe got some of my oddness from her :oP |
|
|
|
|
Okay, this has to be the shittest week on record.
Tuesday: I got talking to someone bloody gorgeous who lived ten minutes up the road who wanted me to fuck them in the woods!
Wednesday: I got dragged up to college by my support worker to try and my way back onto the Access course which I fucked up last year, I really really didn't want to go - I LOVED being on the course, but I saw no reason why they would ever let me back onto it.. but.. they did! the (outgoing) head of the course decided to let me back on for a 6 week probation.. if i managed to get my shit together I could stay. (for those that don't know: I'm not a psycho, I just wouldn't do stuff like this if left to my own devices, so I have a support worker to make me do them)
Thursday: rumours began to circulate that the Access course had been suspended.
Friday: It was confirmed that the Access course had been completely cancelled, which was like a kick to the chest. On the plus side my mother was due to pay her second £95 payment to the bank to pay off her overdraft, however the letter she recieved to remind her about it also said she actually had £296 in the account! So she rang up and talked to the bank and they said they would investigate and get back to her - she asked if she needed to pay the £95 that day and they said not to.
Saturday: Mother recieves a phonecall from the bank demanding to know why she didn't pay the £95.. she was so upset at this that she got all confused and said "because I don't have the money". I went for a walk to ring Lizzie but by the time I got to the woods (dont like walking around the streets talking on the phone - so I go to the woods) it was 5.15pm, it being dinner time I texted Lizzie asking if she was masticating.. apparently she misread it :oP
Sunday: Nothing much happened today other than worrying, and also we discovered the phone was busted (It had been on the blink for a week or two).
Monday: I decide that I'd take Mothers card to the machine in the hopes that it'd tell me what her balance was (I was hoping it wouldnt swallow it if I didn't ask for money), however I discovered that before I had gotten up my Mother had gone out with my card to get some cash to use to buy a new phone to call the bank and explain about Saturdays stupidity, however being so on-edge she mistakingly took out her card thinking it was mine and inserted it into the machine.. only to have it swallowed when she entered my cards PIN number.. She was so distraught after this that she borrowed a phone from a neighbour and rang the bank.. and was told that she in fact owed them £326, and that because she hadnt paid on Friday her payment plan was cancelled and they wanted the whole lot this week!
Tuesday (Today): I was dragged up to college once again to try and get onto a different course, I wound up signing up for Level 2 English (that being regular GCSE equivalent.), which has me feeling rather down to be honesty, I had felt like my life was actually going somewhere. Then tonight, the person who wanted to be shagged senseless in the woods.. told me they had gotten back with their bf and didn't want to talk to me anymore..
PS: I have now heard 3 reasons for the Access being dropped, the official reason given at the meeting with the Access students yesterday was apparently that they didnt have enough lecturers to run the course. However today I was told that the reason was because the course was to be re-organised, and they didnt have time to do it before term started. However I also learnt that someone who was to have started the Access this year was told that the course was being cancelled due to the calibre of the students! |
|
|
|
|
Okay, I've had a stressful week, for those of you who don't know last year I was on an Access to Higher Education course, however I had a bit of a breakdown of sorts towards the end and had to drop out. Yesterday I got dragged up to college to beg to be let back on he course. I didn't want to go as I honestly couldnt think of a reason why they would want me back on the course, and therefor didnt want to ask them to let me back on.. Well, it all turned out for the best, the head of the course let me back on for a 6 week probation! Then today people started getting phonecalls asking them to come to a meeting on Monday because the course has been suspended. |
|
|
|
|
You know, I've always been a leg man, for as long as I can remember.. But I have recently developed an appreciation for breasts. Damn breast vices/presses look awesome! :oP |
|
|
|
|
"I am the Lilly and you are the bee... want some of my nectar?"
BEST LESBIAN PICKUP LINE.. EVAR!!1! :oP
|
|
|
|
|
Cor Blimey, I had quite a good day today - I saw my best friend Ben for the first time in about 6 weeks (it was also the first time I'd left the house in about 12 days) and we went to see The Dark Knight which turned out to be even awesomer than it looked! Before going there we decided to go for food, first we headed for Nandos, which apparently Ben has NEVER seen full.. only it was full.. so we went to the other Nandos in town, and that also was full! so we decided to go to a pub that does food.. it was full of smoke and firemen!! So we settled on KFC, which we found without any problem.. was it Gods will? dun-dun-DUN! PS: And now I have mayonaise in my pocket..
|
|
|
|
|
Yesterday I saw someone call eBay "Fleabay", likening it to a flea market full of useless junk, I feel this analogy is unfair. *he says after bidding on a set of leather bound 1964 roadmaps*
|
|
|
|
|
Bloody HELL this weather is ungodly! I've actually just *brace yourselves* TAKEN MY T-SHIRT OFF! I'm actually sat here in nowt by black cargo pants and SWAT boots..
|
|
|
|
|
*rant* ARGH!!! BT SUCKS!!! I've just been without net for 2 days, back on for one evening, then back out for over 24 hours again *end rant*
In other news.. I last week I met a 17 year old online acquiantance (just since we had nowt else to do - didn't meet up for anything sexual/kinky!) and our path eventually took us to a pub.. then last night I met a 22 year old.. who wanted me to take her to the park so she could go on the swings :o| (then again I still play Dungeons & Dragons and Warhammer so I really shouldnt begrudge her still enjoying her childhood amusements :oP that and, um, the swings were fun..)
|
|
|
|
|
I must say this has been a week of firsts for me, yesterday I had my first ever kebab (as in the kebab shop/van version, rather than the more quaint little cubes on sticks).. and today, I've had my first ever COLD kebab! :oP
|
|
|
|
|
Last night I was talking to my friend Emily on MSN when she came out and said "oo denim leggings!" I was very taken aback by this as I misread it as "do my lemmings"
|
|
|
|
|
Its 3.15am! I am now going to bed, as I have just 2 minutes ago finished fitting a new tap for my mother in the kitchen :oD theres no sink at this point in time.. but at least theres a tap! g'night all!
|
|
|
|
|
Moi: "my fried Kerry is giving me useful dating tips like: 'btw dont get cum in a girls eye'"
Helen: "Well that is very important... It stings fairly. X"
|
|
|
|
|
Donna: "It's always YOU that has these problems!"
Moi: "are you saying I'm a jinx?"
Donna: "You are, yes"
Donna: "A big furry jinx"
|
|
|
|
|
Lol, you gotta love ebay: in the Antiquarian & Collectable Books section there is a volume of the Illustrated London News July to December 1878 (covering such notable affairs as Cyprus, the Paris Exhibition and the Afghan War) and also a copy of the 1922 Times World Survey Atlas.. and nestled between these two tomes? Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets 1st edition hardback.. :oP
PS: I should point out that I actually did make the tea.
|
|
|
|
|
Mother: "is there any reason why you cant go and make the tea?"
Moi: "umm"
Mother: "other than that your a lazy git"
Moi: "umm" |
|
|
|
|
Huzzah! For those that don't know I have two domiciles, I spend part of the week at my mothers in Reading and part of the week at my place in Newbury, this naturally leaves me in a quandry over whether I should keep my restraints and suchlike in Newbury or Reading since any kinky encounters are likely to be spur of the moment.. However, yesterday I acquired a laptop (so I dont have to come home to my mothers to use the computer for my college homework), the computer came with its own carry case.. which for some reason has pockets for two laptops.. this not only means I now have room to carry my bondage paraphenalia about, but the bag also has two jingly zips (which padlock together) and a carry strap which clips on with a jingly clip - so not only do I have room to carry my bondage gear, I dont even have to worry about the buckles jingling :oP |
|
|
|
|
You know your a cat lover when.. the cat smashes your widescreen TV and your not trying to kill the bastard..
|
|
|
|
|
Moi: "er, why does my tea have jam in it?"
Mother: "oh I couldnt find the sugar"
|
|
|
|
|
Me: "shall we have a change from Mad Max?"
*changes music from Max Max Beyond Thunderdome soundtrack to the Conan the Barbarian Theme*
Me: "is that better?"
*Mother glares*
|
|
|
|
|
Moi: "Lizzie ate my last Rolo!"
Helen: "Aww babe I'm sorry x"
Moi: "er.. no thats good, it means she might be interested in me :oD"
Helen: "O wow! sorry I really dont understand the politics of chocolate!"
|
|
|
|
|
Apparently you need to do three things to be friends with a girl:
I. Be able to add the phase * hugs x * at appropriate moments.
II. & III. Undestand, and if possible also imitate irrational emotional ramblings and insecurities.
Apparently I get on rather well with women because not only am I good at I & II, but I actually have far more irrational emotional insecurities than most women and therefore have no need to imitate them.
|
|
|
|
|
For those that dont know one my cats died the other day, so I've been rather upset.. I would just like to say to whoever it was who said burying him in the garden would be easy: YOUR A BLOODY JINX! THE SODDING SPADE BROKE!
|
|
|
|
|
Mother: "are you going to take this?"
Me: "what is it?"
Mother: "£3.53 from your bag"
Me: "from my bag?"
Mother: "yes"
Me: "oh, is it my money?"
Mother: "YES!"
Me: "OHH! I thought you just put it in there so it wouldnt get lost!"
Mother: "YOUR AN IDIOT!"
|
|
|
|
|
Moi: "its been suggested i tell <snip> how i feel about her"
Teensub: "yes"
Moi: "I was thinking of sending her an email today"
Moi: "but i just cant think of what to say"
Teensub: "the truth"
Moi: "the truth?! what kind of crazy woman logic is that?!?!"
|
|
|
|
|
I got out of college early yesterday, so naturally I wound up catching
the 8pm train home.. It was mostly uneventful despite the fact that
Dracula had apparently seized control of the train, shortly after
leaving Thatcham this deep, slow east european voice came over the PA
system: "Good Evening Ladies and.. Gentlemen, I would like to tell you
that sandwiches and hot drinks are half-price".
I can only
assume that he was trying to lure passengers to the buffet car to suck
zeir blud.. which is I suppose the most fitting place to do it..
Actually
that wasnt his first announcement, shortly after leaving Newbury he'd
said something along the lines of "Good Evening Ladies and Gentlemen, I
have to inform you that terrorists have been arrested with cappucino."
but I'm fairly certain I misheard THAT one..
|
|
|
|
|
AAAAAAAARGH!!!!! I was lying in bed this morning trying to get back to sleep (was in bed ill most of today) and suddenly realised that I hadnt sent the epic reply I'd composed for someone I've been exchanging messages
with this week, as I had been in the process of doing so when Firefox fucked up.. So I've just logged back in specifically to send it.. and Lo, shes deleted her profile!!! GAGH! I hate it when that happens!
In other news.. I had a cup of hot chocolate earlier, afterwards one of my cats started dipping his paw into the chocolaty sludge at the bottom of the cup and then licking it off.. he was at it for 5 minutes *blink blink*
|
|
|
|
|
Oh dear oh dear oh dear.. It seems I am corrupting the dear sweet college girls.. Last week I had two of them reading How to Become a Porn Director.. today I had one of them reading the Warhammer Fantasy Battle rulebook :oP
|
|
|
|
|
*phew* thankfully my pessimism was premature.. hookay i did fail the Biology Test, but I actually got 37% which is pretty good seeing as I thought I didnt get a single question right..
Even my presentation on the Bubonic Plague went quite well today, even if it did start with: "okay well, we decided to do The Plague, because when the teacher was throwing out suggestions we figured things were hardly going to get better after The Plague.."
Alas, I have managed to piss off a tasty lesbian friend of mine, so I shant be making any homemade porn anytime soon :o(
|
|
|
|
|
Meh, God I'm a total retard ~ I got my Sociology exam-essay back today, it was so damned bad that not only did i get it referred, but the teacher actually thought I had no interest in Sociology.. (which is bad as you need at least 2 modules in it to pass the overall Access Course), then in the last lesson I did the Biology test I missed on Monday.. I dont think I got even a single question right..
|
|
|
|
|
Dear God I'm just not with it today.. I've been sat at this PC for 13 hours, and I've only just noticed why the speakers arent working: I forgot to switch them on this morning..
Having resolved this issue I decided it was too loud, so I turned the volume down, I was surprised to note how much faster the bass dropped off compared to the overall volume.. It dropped off a little too much for my liking so I cranked it back up a bit.. It took me 6 twiddles to realised it was the Bass nob not the Volume Nob.. Methinks I should go to bed now..
|
|
|
|
|
lol, the thing on the telly about the great wall of china just said "he returned to his daily work at court, which consisted of taking drugs and having sex with as many concubines as possible"
|
|
|
|
|
Huzzah! I always find it hard to get involved in online forums, but i have finally made another post on Bondage.com's forum.. (i've been on there for 4 years, in which time i've made about 8 posts, and most of those were quizzes), and what, I hear you ask, was my insightful contribution to the world of BDSM? Behold:
"I always thought Yavin was a gas-giant, in which case the Death Stars gun could have had a different effect than on a solid body, eg: it could have had no effect at all, or it could have ignited it thereby turning it into a sun"
|
|
|
|
|
Note to Self: when you get talking to a seriously hot, seriously masochistic sub on Faceparty who says she'll do ANYTHING you want, dont, and i mean DONT accidentally send her the link to Collarme.com so that she can ditch you for better looking/richer/nearer Doms!
|
|
|
|
|
FUCK!!!! There was just a SERIOUSLY loud screaming catfight outside the
back door.. I went crashing out there with a torch terrified a Fox had
one of the cats by a leg.. i frantically chased the sound up the slope
to next doors back fence (left hand side) and whatever it was (it was
big and grey) it leapt off and ran away.. i shon my torch to see what
it was attacking.. and found it wasnt one of my cats.. BUT A FUCKING
BADGER?!?! which promptly regained its composure after a few seconds,
then growled at me and went to chase me! (I ran like hell!)
Er.. that is, i ran like hell in a very Dominant and Manly way..
|
|
|
|
|
Nine Days.. NINE DAYS after my pre-ordered copy of Harry Potter arrived i have FINALLY managed to get my hands on it.. Bloody Mother! at last its mine, my precioussssssss *strokes it lovingly*
In other news.. i really should get round to replying to my messages.. sorry if i havent replied yet!
|
|
|
|
|
Huzzah! I pre-ordered Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows from Amazon for £8.99.. and despite going for free 2nd Class Delivery it still arrived this morning!! :o) alas.. my mother asked me to put the new wheel onto her car this morning (she had an altercation with an invisible uncovered manhole in a road that was under 8" or so of water ~ buckling one of the wheels), and managed to get her grubby protuberances on the book whilst i was doing it :o( Mothers suck!
|
|
|
|
|
ScarOfSin: whats your ultimate fantasy?
Me: to become Lord Protector of the British Commonwealth
ScarOfSin: lol, and your ultimate sexual fantasy?
|
|
|
|
|
My mother DEMANDED that i order her two soppy romance novels from Amazon yesterday.. They didnt quite come to enough for free postage.. so i got Machiavelli's The Prince :oP
|
|
|
|
|
Hmm, you know, i've never really had an interest in 'belting' (whipping with a belt) but i seem to have developed one.. i went into 2 shops last week that sell belts ~ and both times i wound up examining the black leather belts even tho i dont wear them..
|
|
|
|
|
The NHS has many ways to help you quit smoking: Nicotine Patches, Therapy, Blowing you up..
|
|
|
|
|
I was slandered at college this morning!
Teacher: "Were there many floats at the carvinal?"
Student: "there were 51, most were advertising things, but there alot of themed ones aswell, James Bond.. Pirates of the Caribbean, St. Trinians.."
Teacher: "St. Trinians? Hear that Alex, you should have gone.."
Honestly, all you do is answer the question "what do you most want to get out of this course this year" with "Collegegirls!" at the start of the year and they never let you forget it..
|
|
|
|
|
Man walks into reception holding a bundle of leaflets, says to the busty receptionist "i've been told to put these in your rack"
|
|
|
|
|
*sigh* what is it about optimism? why is it whenever anyone says something like "you seem really cool, it would be good to get to know you" they usually dont? I've had two in 10 days!
|
|
|
|
|
*sigh* its my birthday this coming thursday.. i was rather down about it.. i dont want to be 27.. however, it has occured to me that i wont mind being XXVII, as that's actually quite a nice number.. life is was more fun if you think in roman numerals :o)
|
|
|
|
|
I have no idea what i was dreaming about last night.. but for some reason the instant i woke up i found myself contemplating how exactly a pencil sharpener works..
|
|
|
|
|
Hmm, well, nothing even remotely fetish related to put here just yet.. But dont you just hate it when your happily soaking in the bath and one of the cats comes in to see you bearing the gift of a dead rat in its mouth? (okay admitedly it was a young one.. but we HAVE had 2 fully sized ones in the past)
|
|
|
|
|
|
