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| IFor starters, let's eliminate the age issue. I look fifteen years younger than my chronological age (my doctor's words). I think, feel and act younger. I am physically active and enjoy dancing, bicycling, and most sensual activities. So there! Now, I hope we can go on.
I am a hetero submissive who would like to explore a submissive relationship with a loving Domme. I am not sure that I am ready for 365/24/7 roles because of my varied interests, both kinky and vanilla. But, I want to explore mistress/slave relationships and I have the time for multi-day sessions with the right woman. If you are a domme who likes to switch on occasion, I am top-curious and have some skills in bondage and corporal activities. (Care to explore with me?) I don't care for bitchiness, verbal abuse, unnecessary scolding, unearned anger, phony excuses for punishment, and the like. I don't see why bdsm activities can't be warm, friendly and fun. And, when I'm subbing, I really do like to please and I don't need a drill sergeant.
As for my kink and fetish tastes, there is a checklist with my profile and I would be glad to email any more info.
My vanilla interests include photography (serious), cycling, walking, gardening, home projects, dancing, reading, film, cooking, winemaking, traveling backroads, and socializing with friends
I am ISO friends, playmates, and particularly, someone special for that romantic LTR. Compatibility is a complex factor and I hesitate just to put out a brief shopping list. You can only learn so much online, so meeting in person is a priority. (Although email exchanges can be fun with the right person.)
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Good Pain-Bad Pain
Jay Wiseman says, "Good pain, good! Bad pain, bad!" Simple, yet, profound and much discussed here. But, I'm going to talk about this topic in a very different context than usually found on this forum. Yesterday I lent my support to an event my bike club puts on every year at this time; the double century. That's right, a 200 mile bike ride that's completed in one day. "Ouch!", you say- Yeah, there's plenty of ouch to go around at these events. Plenty of Good, and some Bad.
What I did yesterday was drive a SAG wagon. Bicycle guru, the late Sheldon Brown defines a SAG wagon as follows-
'A car or truck that picks up or otherwise assists riders who have had to stop riding, either due to fatigue, injury, or mechanical failure. This is primarily a touring term, racers call the corresponding vehicle the "broom wagon."
Some people believe that the term derives from the verb "sag", others maintain that it is an acronym for "Support And Gear." '
Anyway, I get to see the whole event from start to finish (pun intended). So, yesterday at around 11am I'm parked on a shady turnout on the steep, winding road up to Cobb Mountain. Ambient temps on the road are in the high 90s to low 100s. There's a continuous stream of cyclists slowly grinding their way uphill. The sweat is flowing by both drops and streams. And the expression on their faces show (guess what?) both kinds of pain. If you were a sadist and were watching this bizarre parade, I suspect you'd end up with a pair of sticky knickers. I've got a spray bottle of water and I give each rider a shot at the back of their head and neck as they pass. They respond with moans and mumbled thanks and arch their necks in pleasure like you just pressed some magic button in their crotches. Great fun! Oh, yes...
There is always some bad pain at these events. "Road rash" (abrasions) is always bad pain. I picked up one poor rider who had gone over the bars at about 35 mph. He had about 15 sq. in. of road rash on one thigh that looked like strawberry jam. Definitely bad pain. Sore bottoms can turn bad. Normally, after a few hours on the saddle the ache reaches a certain level and stays there for the rest of the ride. It can be dealt with. But sometimes when there is an abrasion, or worse yet, a boil- that's bad. Break out the Bag Balm!
You want fetishes? Cycling is crawling with them. Look at all that slinky spandex! Butts and baskets, oh my! And those bizarre helmets... Into body aromas? -nonstop! And equipment? You ought to hear a discussion about the merits of steel vs. carbon vs. aluminum vs. titanium as a frame material. Then there's shoe styles and glove styles and expensive sunglasses. Somebody ought to open a bike shop on Folsom called "Mr. B".
Another approach to the voluntary pain thing: I do it because it feels so good when I stop. There's some of that here too. I remember the Sunday, ages ago, after I rode my first double century. I was soo tired, but, it was such a good tired! I was so relaxed and it felt like I was wandering around in a dream. The other time I felt that way was the day after my first night and first real bdsm session with my lovely Canadian Mistress of a few years ago. I felt so light and dreamy!
So,why don't y'all tell me about your hobbies (wicked grin) |
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On my mind- Domestic domination and submission rituals. Do they work? What are your rituals? Please drop me a line.
The context here is a long term loving monogamous relation ship. The activities discussed here have nothing to do with dungeon scenes or institution play (hospital, prison, military) I'm calling them rituals for now. I guess one could call them training sessions, or conditioning, or discipline, or coaching, maybe spiritual exploration, or exercises to facilitate intimacy, or even love dances. They should never be called punishment. I don't think the term, protocol, fits that well either.
Humiliation could be used for some of these activities but the result should be growth and not diminishment.
I have no interest in using You/me style capital usage and so on. And I've never cared for the term, master. But, I do love the word, mistress. It's a lovely word and I would be thrilled to be asked to use it.
These rituals have origins in the writings of Elise Sutton. While I disagree with much of her overall philosophy, she is spot-on with these. (These are actually my interpetations and improvisations on her 'procedures'.
So, here they are:
Corporal sessions- usually weekly at the same time. Rituals: sub is naked, on all fours or on back under mistress' high heels. Foot or shoe worship, handkissing, vows of love and obedience are given. Sub is lectured and his behavior assessed. Corporal play will range from otk spanking to flogging etc. Restraints can be used. This is always followed by aftercare with orgasm inducement optional.
Bondage days- Day long (up to 24 hr.) restraint sessions with varying degrees of restraint but always dependent on partner to some degree. Start morning with cleansing enema, shower, shave etc. Sub must ask permission to go to toilet through the day and he will be supervised. Diapers (adult) will be used at some levels of restraint. The lightest restraint will simply be depriving sub of any clothes to go outside in. Hobbles, mitts, cuffs, gags, blindfolds, bed restraints, chastity devices, rope, leash and collar, will be used in different combinations for varying time periods. Meals will be hand fed to sub while he is tied to a chair.
Orgasm control- Orgasms will be allowed only with the mistress' permission. The mistress will induce the orgasm by manual manipulation, anal penetration and/or with vibrator. The sub will almost always be restrained at this time. Frequency of orgasm should maintain a good balance of desire and satisfaction for effective conditioning and inspiring adoration.
On-demand sexual service.- The sub will serve his mistress with his mouth, his hands, or with her toys whenever asked. He shall be trained to give her multiple orgasms when desired. Cuddling, kissing, hugging, fondling will also be included in this service.
Face-sitting in private and semi-public situations will happen on a regular basis.
Forced feminization- The sub is required to wear women's panties rather than men's underpants. The sub's body hair is shaved at regular intervals. Feminine clothing will be worn at mistress' whim. Facial makeup will be applied on occasion.
This can occur in semi-public as well as private places.
Semi-public play is encouraged. Semi-public refers to venues such as dungeon play parties, domme parties, etc. Collars, leashes, chastity devices,etc will usually be worn.
Reminders- When the sub leaves home he may be made to wear a butt plug, a cock harness, a girdle and stockings or other reminder of his mistress' control.
Maid service- The sub will bathe, massage, help dress, do pedicures/manicures and otherwise pamper his mistress. He will also serve at parties given by mistress for her lady friends. A frilly apron will be worn when serving.
Chauffering- The sub will drive his mistress on her shopping expeditions and assist her with carrying packages and even give his cautious opinion when asked.
Anal play- Enemas, butt plugs, milking, strap-on play, shall be part of regular routine.
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| Age: 44 |
| Auckland,
New Zealand |
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