i am now able to see and feel what it means to be Yours?. Your spice.  In mind, body, heart and soul, i commit myself to You for as long as You will have me.  Before i met You, i "wanted", yes i said wanted, this M/s experience, but I had no idea yet what it meant, and how all encompassing it would be.  i think it has really sunken in for me.  i definitely know how powerful it is to need You with every ounce of my being.  Right away You taught me the differences between wanting, desiring and needing??  Although i still slip on occasion, i believe i have the concept down now.

You have described the process of O/our development in several ways?  being absorbed, being coccooned, melding into You?.  i know those feelings now and they are amazing!  They also grow more and more intense every day!

i will continue to devote my attention to learning, bettering myself, adjusting my mindset, improving my patience and decreasing my tendency to negotiate.  i shall work hard to eliminate thought processes, beliefs and behaviors that add no value and have no place in O/our relationship.  Leaving behind my natural tendency to be independent and completely self sufficient will be one of the hardest things i have ever done, and i know it will not happen overnight.  Afterall, it took 41 years to get these habits engrained in me.  But, giving up those inclinations and deferring to You has been far easier than i ever imagined.  No only do i feel safer in Your care than ever in my life, i feel more empowered as well.

i understand, as You have explained to me, that my commitment to You is a lifelong one.  One that will only be broken if the needs of my parents or my child require it.  This is fair and reasonable, but frankly, i can't think of a single situation that would require such drastic measures.  On the contrary, i feel much stronger and more capable of dealing with any difficulties life may throw at me knowing You are with me, than i would on my own.  Without You, i don't believe i could ever feel whole again.  In You, i have found what was always missing in me.

i find it mindblowing that You have been a presence in my life for only a little over 3 short months!!  i already don't know how i managed to come this far without You.  You are the strength, the steadiness, the calming, guiding force that keeps me focused and grounded.  You compliment me and fill the spaces where i am lacking.  Sometimes my mind has unproductive thoughts such as "where would W/we be if W/we had met "X" number of years ago  How much pain and suffering could have been avoided?"  But then i have to stop myself, for i have to believe that i didn't meet You sooner for a reason.  i believe that reason is because i wasn't ready for You.  Not ready for all You bring and for the changes i would be required to make in myself.  To assume my natural place as a slave? Your slave.  That time is now!  "Today is a gift, accept the present."  (Wonder where i heard that?)  Today i haven't a single doubt that i am in my rightful place?. for the first time in my life i feel as though i belong.  i will do everything in my power to retain that place and to make You happy.  Your happiness multiplies mine exponentially!!  Which makes me want to work even harder.  Soon it won't even resemble work, it will just be?. second nature, instinct?..

The thing Sir, that i am most pleased to tell You, is that i have learned that O/our M/s relationship means oh so much more than just a great sensual relationship?.  it has also given me trust, commitment and love at levels i never dreamed of.  You never cease to amaze me.

Thank You for all of this and so much more?. You are my Master, my lover, and my best friend.

i love You,

Your spice

Slave Ownership & Registration

# 344-870-786

spice?s Bucket List

No, this is not a list of things i desire to do before i ?kick the bucket?

It is so much more

What was in that bucket that dangled precariously before my eyes,

With me serving as its anchor?

Well there is the obvious capacity for 5 gallons of water,

Which per Google is 8.34 lbs per gallon,

You do the math??

So many more things went into that bucket than just water

things with power, yet didn?t weigh an ounce

His soul piercing stare & wicked, evil grin

Fear, excitement, amazement

Pain, eroticism

Self awareness

Gritted teeth, clenched fists

The chill of cold water on bared flesh

More pain

Frustration, exasperation, desperation

Master domination

slave submission

a gag stifled moan, a liberated scream

tears

begging for release

limits searched for

limits reached

Passion, lust

&

Let?s not forget love

Thank You Sir

Your ?
will alone brings my release,
?
An end to fire; sweet surcease.

Caress ?
me now, cut loose my ties
?
And look at me with talking eyes
?
That speak of journeys we have taken,
?
And promise more till we awaken.