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schizophrenia

schizofreen
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schizophrenia - Male Submissive, Mumbai | BDSM Profile on Collarspace

About schizophrenia

Being dominated by a woman is a fantasy that takes one back to his foetal psychology. Its latent in most of the men, but in some like me who are highly cerebral and intellectually evolved in the species; the trait is craving to be handled with care by someone capable of understanding and can play with it. The release of emotions is a catharsis.
Man and Woman are in an eternal cosmic dance. Coming closer and then going away to come closer again. They speak, fall in love,live their fantasies, procreate and in the process live and also kill each other. Their story is a love song which is the primal song of creation that pulsates with the pulse of the Universe. And as in the Universe their is a ruler and the ruled, the rider and the horse, the one on the top and the other prostrate in submission; men at the feet of the woman, a Shiva and a Kali....the ancient call of our genes to be taken, defeated and comforted by She the Creator. We man have to wait for our destiny.
Sometimes when I look at myself in the mirror I feel what a crazy creation Iam! How much do I really know my self? When I say it's me, my body,how much do I control it with my will? Can I slow down any process, change the design ? It seems I am a complete alien to my own body and each cell,tissue or organ, is programmed and has a mind of its own.
I am an explorer who has lost his way. Marooned in an uninhabited island, I have only my mind to talk to and it's frightening. Like a modern-day Robinson Crusoe, stranded in the teeming faceless human ocean in an unknown heartless City. Its an SOS MAYDAY, pls rescue me.
Is it so difficult to get a BDSM experience ? I fret in my insomnia like a caged animal pining to be released. My carnal fantasy of the Woman who works on my body and soul while I am totally incapacitated looks like will remain a fantasy. Help !!! is there any kind cruel Domina listening ???
While watching the Oscar ceremony on TV now, suddenly was remembering a movie seen many many springs ago in my college days - " Bitter Moon" directed byRoman Polanski. I am astounded to realise now that how drawn up I was to the movie's S&M scenes of the seductive young wife of the older man. How the dark passions seemed so enchantingly attractive. The gender assertiveness I wear, tries to break free from the burden of stereotype masculinity and be naturally human.
In the tunnels of mind, I am traveling, sometimes lost in the maze. My nature is my biggest surprise. What I seek is layered inside my foetal memory which I am trying to discover and what I discovered so far is an indomitable urge to be taken in control by a sensuous woman.
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