|
Communication is a very important thing to me. I am also a planner. I like to know generally what to expect in day to day events but I am occasionally spontaneous. If keeping in touch is a source of paranoia for you, please let me know and I'll wish you well. Random observation: This summer hasn't been nearly as hot as last year.
|
|
|
|
|
I went back into the rabbit hole. No not the one Alice went down. The dark one, under the rock. The one that sounds like it has an mining drill pounding against the hardest rock known to nature.
I stand in the absence of light and feel every molecule of my body pulse with every throb of sound that emanates from the darkness.
The air is heavier, with metallic moisture and an all to familiar scent.
I don't want to come out this time.
|
|
|
|
|
Interesting interactions lately. Lots of guys that have Dom profiles that are curious about serving as a sub have been messaging me. Must secret switch month. Don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with switching, but it just struck me odd. Still the search continues.
|
|
|
|
|
Three days before the Art Hop and I'm pretty anxious. Wendy is coming down that afternoon, I appreciate her presence. My nerves are raw and by Friday I hope to have relaxed enough to enjoy it. Following week it's off to Royal Oak. God I miss the East side.
|
|
|
|
|
People need to lighten up and not take things so literally. NO, I don't kick box. If you knew me, you'd know how utterly hilarious that assumption is.
|
|
|
|
|
I'm bored. Boredom makes me restless, hence the name. It also makes me pensive and more heavy handed than usual. Some may see that as a benefit, but when I have no target to unleash my pent up frustration, it just gets worse. Perhaps Kick Boxing would help... Is it spring yet?
|
|
|
|
|
I could rant and rave about the BS I've been dealing with in the last few months but it'll only make me look like the desperate one. Clearly I'm not, but when expectations aren't met, it's pretty disappointing.
New Year. Same shit. Let's move on.
|
|
|
|
|
Vaca was lovely and enlightening, the tattoo is almost healed, I'm ready to go back for another. Changes with the boy, holidays are always busy, and work is kicking my ass. Wonderful times with the Wendylady, and I'm learning more and more about Her and Jim. She's so lucky, I'll leave it at that. :D
|
|
|
|
|
Pretty pleased with the week off I'm about to take. People to do, places to see... wait that doesn't sound right. Lots of fun to be had next week; as well as the week after. Can't wait to get back to the Detroit area and see how it's changed and how it's stayed the same.
|
|
|
|
|
Good weekend of shopping with a very awesome friend... She's teaching me more focus and relaxation of who and what I am... good to have a friend that understands the battle within... I smell sexy... Bath and Body works got half my week's pay, just about. Fun munch. Still have to find a social scene that isn't boarding generations but not get to cliquey. One can dream
|
|
|
|
|
A year and a few months go by and I dust off this profile and take a look around. Learning more about Rope and how nice it looks on flesh is a welcome distraction. Trying to find a victim for learning is finding me wanting. Is it me or does my luck run in two year waves? Up and down like an annoying roller coaster.
|
|
|
|
|
I'm pretty certain that challenging me with the words 'coward' would be a definate shutdown of interest. Maybe I'm taking this a lil too seriously but even in vanilla situations, the comparison to Myself and coward tends to make the sound of their voice resemble the Adult voices on the Peanuts cartoons.
|
|
|
|
|
Time flies when you are having fun.
The boi and I are exploring new avenues, and are talking about including another into play.
Even Dommes learn to stretch Their wings.
|
|
|
|
|
Two months.... almost three... how time flies.
Those that say they wished to remain friends... all but disappear... their names blink on and off on messengers and never do I get an IM... interesting.
Saturday is My birthday... going to be interesting as well.
Not holding much creedance to this forum for much longer... call it boredom.... |
|
|
|
|
Brick Walls.
Obstacles that I really hate to deal with and even worse, never see until they are right smack dab in the way.
One moment you are going along nicely, then BAM!
Anyone have a sledge hammer I can borrow?
|
|
|
|
|
I'd like to thank LadyEnglish for inviting Me to Her wonderful studio, tonight.
I haven't had so much fun in I don't know when. Learned quite a bit tonight, Especially that I don't EVER want to wait that long again to hear that lovely snap of leather on flesh.
I don't think I'll ever here 'shut up' even whispered passed those muzzled lips of his again.
|
|
|
|
|
"Shut up" how cute!.... Telling Me to shut up and laughing... how utterly amusing!
I missed control.... got a lil bit back and will be teaching someone not to tell Me to shut up... blue balls are very uncomfortable... and relief after 6 minutes intervals... how torturous!
Now that the "I think You're kewl" session is over... maybe the real work can be done...
Shut up, eh? Six times six is thirty six. Can you handle 36 minutes of an aching sac and dripping?? If you are gonna talk the talk you are gonna walk the walk... doubled over in pain. |
|
|
|
|
" Don't Sweat it. " he said.
When that's exactly what I wanted to do... well, not exactly.
I have often been accused of being dramatic. This case is no exception. I've come to the realization that tho long term, the handful of submissive men/slaves I have had relationships with and the parties and events I've been to, to 'hook up' with someone and just play were part of a long journey to discover what I really want. Unfortunately that journey is still ongoing.
In My last entry I accused a majority of the users here as only interested in 'instant gratification' and strictly physical relationships. Funny how things like that can come back and bite you in the ass.
I met someone... after talking for few days. Pretty intensely about things other than just the lifestyle. I thought it was great. Had renewed hope for this medium - blah blah blah. I wanted a connection and the beginnings were there. People always say, meet them in a public place, for safety. That's smart, but it's not the best place to discuss issues like how you got into D/s relationships. Coffehouses, and bookstore cafe's with the 'common' folk aren't ready for discussions that really should be more discreet.
We went some place a little more relaxed and it wasn't so awkward. We talked about how awkward things were, and that talking one on one away from crowds was better. There were trees. I love trees, this big willow tree was right there... 200 years old he said. I am sure it was at least that old. He surely wasn't a 'yes man' a sub/slave that wants to do whatever I want, or talk about whatever I want... or the stupid stereotypical bull that emcompasses what I am used to.
That is when My demeanor changed, I had less 'control'. He's not a slave he's a switch but that didn't matter to me. He was.. IS intelligent... and has opinions similar AND different from mine. Yet the strange thing was, I liked that he didn't nod his head like a bobble head. And he didn't like the book I picked up... just for the saking of having some contrived connection. I realized that that was what was missing for the last 10 or so years. Equality in mind and spirit, and allowing the sexual side to work out naturally. It was like a door that I never even knew was there had opened. Ironicially it shocked me. And it showed in the babbling that ensued on my part.
Sensing this, he said " Don't sweat it." And after I thought about it, the twisted mind I have thought, " I want to sweat it... I want to sweat YOU... make you sweat... push, pull... in, out... taste, touch, smell and experience all of you... 'Don't sweat it?' Oh you'll sweat.... but then again so will I."
Will he read this? I don't know. We made no definate plans to meet again. I'd love to, but I am not chasing... chasing is not healthy for anyone. Am I a drama Queen? sure... I know what I want and I usually get it...not this time, this is a challenge that I don't want to ruin with Drama, but I also don't want to compromise who I am.... Drama Queen, you bet... |
|
|
|
|
Maybe it's Me, but since I have had this account the majority of those that are seeking, whatever they are seeking are looking for instant or very short term situations. Sometimes without getting to know someone in the first place? Me, Myself find that very disconcerting. I realize we have grown into an instant gratification type of a society. But for all the subs and slaves that have messaged Me in the last few days that I HAVE bothered to read; because I've deleted more messages than I've read by far, only a few bothered to 1) read My profile first and note that I don't like to be called Ma'am 2) Indicate why the hell they are messaging Me in the first place I.E. Similar interests or location, or both... and lastly; indicate that they wish some sort of lasting relationship, not some impromptu beating on a night their wife thinks they are playing poker with the guys.
Now, call Me incredibly naive but what the hell is that about?
|
|
|
|
|
|
