?Hello and thanks for having a look. That said let's?
just jump right on in to this profile?
about?yours truly here!
So you may find out all my wants and desires,
while thinking all my
sarcasm is witty and endearing.
First thing you should know is what I am not
and that is simple. ?I am not some
"vanilla"?lookingto spice things up.
This is not some role I play at or pretend to act out nor is it
a weekend guise for me. This is who and what I am
and with that said my motto to live by is?
The only safe word here is... MORE!
I have seen enough to know what
I want and expect from my subs.
I can be understanding and patient finding enjoyment
teaching those new to this lifestyle.
Guiding and instructing are part of who I am.
Now forwhat I am hoping to find in you:
That is a submissive woman who knows
above all things how to
be just that a Woman!
She can be comfortable, confident and open minded.
To what ever experiences we may have before us.
One who cares about herself
and her own appearance, and how that reflects upon
the one she has chosen to serve and submit to.
I can ramble forever so if you want toknow more just ask.
? As Always Be Safe, Sane and
Very,Very Naughty, ~M~
So I decided to write my journal here today for the first time in years actually!
I stopped using this site as I used to for so long due to a bad experience with a sub and her ridiculous behavior after we separated.
All that aside I find myself not only back here but also back in California after living in Vegas for the last few years.
I once again am in a state of change as I fine tune all that goes with a big move and subsequent career changes.
Though I must say that all this is still easier and even possible due to my still terminally single status. I still after so many years looking have been unable to find the women that has balance in her life and enjoys not only my fetishes as well as her own but also understand what a truly mutual uplifting and trusting relationship is and should be.
So I hope as always that I am just 1 more corner away from running right into her!
Enjoy your day and lives everyone as they are precious in their liquid like ability to simply evaporate before our eyes!
~M.H.~
I AM LEFT TO WONDER AT THE LITTLE THINGS IN LIFE...
THE TIMES OF EASIER SMILES,
HAPPIER CONVERSATIONS
AND TRUST THAT MADE
YOU FEEL WHOLE!
~M.H.~ 11/8/11
Wow I am missing Journal Entries and everything,
this is really Fucked Up!
I had an ex-friend yes she was a F.W.B. and wanna be sub,
hi-jack this and countless other profiles of mine and e-mails accounts, etc... All over the damn net, and oh so much worse and more.
Which I will get into later for all my friends here,
whom I hope still are after all her messing
around with people as if
she where me.
I'll be back later just had to start some
where with getting this back
to being my page!
LOL
????? I wrote a very cryptic and confusing journal a little while back on 4/26 and left it with the statement that I would return to make it all make more sense. ???? On that day I had just gotten into a bit of trouble with my old friends the O.C. PD and long story short I was able to have a very serious hiccup dismissed and been given renewed life!? ???? So I am faced with a tough decision and still looking for the thing that eludes me at every turn.? The right sub to spend my life with. ???? Who would have thought that I would be here at this age and still without the right one?
Hello to all my friends here that I do not always have the chance to speak to. I am writing this today with a very uneasy feeling about me. You see this year thus far has been absolutely tragic. A seemingly
endless cacophony of complication all leading up to a seriously bad week. I am currently unable to say more due to the overwhelming feeling of gloom i have now! I will return to make a bit more sense everyone take care,
M
Well hello everyone, I hope your first couple of months of 2010 have been more prosperous then mine thus far.?
Happy New Year, I hope it is starting off well for each and every one of you!
I am getting ready for a much needed trip back home to New York. I leave in a week and as always have so much to get done prior that I get wrapped up in it and lose my focus for 2010 and what I want for myself.
If you know me then you know 2009 was a bitch of a year and I have no one but myself to blame for any of the missteps and seemingly countless errors, that did result in one of the very few regrets I have in my life and that is losing touch with myself while making changes I thought would make a personal situation more stable.
One can not have stability if you are not in touch with the balance in yourself.
At least that is a truth I know and lost for a short time.
So at the start of 2010 here, I find myself firing on all cylinders and more focused and prepared for the next hurtles then I have been for a long time.
Talk to you all soon, needed to vent.
Be good ~M~
As this year mercifully comes to it's conclusion I can only look to 2010 and do what I can to make my year and life as close to the ultimate vision I have for it and those I want to share it with.
I listen to so many people I know who all agree that 2009 was a horrible year, yet no I know has any real plan or even spoken of how they are going to work at changing things for themselves in 2010.
My only true hope for 2010 is that in some way I can help those I care for to achieve whatever their own versions of happiness may be.
~M~
?
Waiting for 2009 to just be over with!
Hello,
I have missed taking the time to write anything be it here or anywhere as of late. My life as all things in this world is always experiencing a metamorphic like assault of change, to which I have no real control over. The only true control in this life is the control over oneself. The ability to be Dominant and lead another is not a form of manipulation, or game. For a true Alpha or Dominant person should never have a need for these petty tools. Those silly games are for insecure, control freaks.
A truly dominate person should only look to show though technique and discipline if necessary. Example and balance is still the best tools to teach anyone. To have the gift of submission from another in any form and yes it is gift to be handled with care, is truly the most intimate and wonderful thing any two people can ever share. Actually understanding the beauty and purity that true dominance and submission mean whether it is for an evening or a lifetime is the first step to understanding your own needs and how to give others what they seek.
I revisit this line of thinking as I do so often because the changes in my own life bring me back to this and to the choices, we make.
I would love to say that with this knowledge things are perfect in my own life.
Laughingly I must say that they are not close, but I see where my own and others actually errors lay.
The fact remains though that to have anything of value with another person you must first have truth and communication.
I only hope that the I have been understanding and open for the right one this time, but as time and distance start to wear at my own patience I see again that all I can control is myself and all those voices inside!
~M~
11/18/09
Well damn if today has not been one of the most roller coaster of days then I can remember in quite a long time!
Although Microsoft can kiss my ass since I am writing to you on the very laptop that had crashed earlier today after working fine and Microsoft said ways unrecoverable!
Bullshit took me a few hours but got it and all my info back!
So one of a few bright spots today!
~M~
My god I have found out what I hope is not too late
that I have been the biggest horse?s ass in recent months.
You see I fell into some very bad personality traits
long ago overcome changed and made into what I had been proud to think of as the
man I had become.
Now though I
have had that light bulb moment and realized my errors.
You see I have
become deeply enamored to an amazing woman whose only real flaw I see is that underneath
her own swagger she does not see what I see in her, and know her own merits.
Yet I saw things in myself I wanted to change to be
healthier and more alert then I had been to give us a true chance at the fun
and happiness I hope we can still share.
However, while
changing some things in myself I lost the man she fell for in the first place
and the confidence in myself to be the true Master I have been for so long.
So it is with a wonderful smirk and glint I had almost
let slip away while being petty,
and ridiculous
that I say to you all,
I am back and here for good my pet and this is the last I am sorry
for not being here the whole time.
~M~
LOOKING TO SUNNY SKIES
So once again I am back and had to say a little something of the state of ?things in my world. Of course everything has changed ?again as they always do for us
all.
However a problem I have been having ?for awhile now seems to be on ?the verge of the outcome ?I have been creating.
You see I am happy to say that I may have finally found that spark or fire ?I have been looking to regain for so long. ? Yet this matter that needs more of my attention now then ever before is ?readying herself to leave me for ?a time going further from me mentally and physically ?then ever before.
?I will need to focus all my force of will on one thing, and push hard for the outcome I desire.
That of course is the new beginning upon her return ?to me.
With all these changes and more drama then I can remember ever happening ?all at once, surprisingly I have felt more a live again then I had for so long that it is hard ?to recall.
?While looking at it now even my worst moments with my pet are better then any other moments with anyone else!
Until we can start life for real, ?fresh I will look to the heavens ?hoping to keep the sun ?in my eyes.
~M~
Well it has been awhile since I last wrote anything, but times have been very hectic and quite busy!
Things continue on wonderfully with my pet. She continues to take to her training with ?enthusiasm and a ?true desire to please.
Aside from some very major changes ?in my own life we have been very busy together.
In the last month or so we have gone ?to the Bondage Ball, Passive Arts, ?She Wants Revenge show and a ?few other outings, while stealing time to make sure she is continuing to progress on ?her journey with me!
Well then with all that aside I am actually in the ?process of moving ?and looking for ?roommates.
If anyone is interested let me know. I will be back when I have a bit more time to write!
~M~
Well this last weekend was one ?of the better times that I have ?had in quite awhile.
My Kitten and I went to ?Passive Art Studios here in L.A. and had a great time.
As well as a blast from my past of the old Melrose shopping days we got ?caught in the epicenter of ?the 5.0 earthquake and all manner of other very "earth shaking" adventures!
As always our time together seems to short but very fulfilling. I am looking forward to this ?long weekend together and the BONDAGE BALL on Sun. 24th.
Hope to see everyone there!
????????????????????????????? ~M~
I seem to be here quite early these
days, which for me is a
very different thing.
I was looking over a few things and
just doing the usual profile
maintenance crap we
all catch ourselves
doing from time
to time.
I have been so wonderfully surprised
?by all the changes that have
taken place within my
own world and that
of my new subs
recently.
It just makes me appreciate how with each new person you have the opportunity to walk down this path with, the things
you may have taken for granted or
?just simply overlooked become
new and fresh all
over again.
?
Especially when seen though the eyes
?of a beautiful woman who
is a true submissive.
I was here this morning and wanted ?to leave a bit of an update on my current subs training to this point.
As well as let all those who have been interested and inquired as to how well she is doing up to this point know that we both appreciate all the supportive e-mails and wanted thank you all.
Secrectz81 is learning and adjusting with everything at such a high level and rate that it leaves even me extremely impressed.
I am sure as we all know that there are plenty of fakes on this site, as well as those that simply do not know ?what the true attributes of the roles they "play at" actually are or their importance
Well let me say that it is overwhelmingly reassuring thing to have found a ?submissive who is capable of so much more then they themselves are even aware.
So before I ramble on endlessly here I simply wanted to say that everything is going ?very well indeed with myself, and my new Kitten!
?????????? Yours, ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?? ~M~
Hello to everyone who has stopped by and left messages. I must say that I am very lucky indeed since I have found my new sub here and could not be happier things have worked out the way they have. I look forward to letting everyone know how secretz81's training is going and our time together progresses. Always my thanks to C.M. M
Hello everyone, I just wanted to jot down a few things to update my situation. I had meet a girl on C.M. and thought after a bit of a touch and go beginning that I might have actually found someone to spend my life with. Well i was monumentally wrong. Yet I am back again and still think this is a great place to meet other people in your area into the lifestyle. Best wishes to all.
"So I am back, lurking in the dark, and looking for those beautiful gossamer specks of light that draw me ever closer..."
?? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?? ~M~? 2/7/09
I am very rarely caught off guard or surprised by much in this life. It does lead me to push myself and others beyond the realm of usual thinking. Yet very recently I believe that I may have found a challenge that may yield an outcome even I am uncertain of, but extremely intrigued to find out. I simply write this here because I meet the person on this site who has given me the opportunity to try my hand so to speak at accomplishing this endeavor. I will write more and be a bit less vague as I continue down this path.
?? I felt it was about time to write a little something. I am back on the
site after not checking it for awhile. It is good to see so many new
faces out there. ? So if you were wondering why I am back, well if you
read my profile you know it's because I am single again. The last go
around was, well it was a disaster that lasted almost two years. ? But
on to new things, so I am back again and as always just trying to find
people to have fun with and if more comes so be it.? Well never a dull
moment.Take Care Everyone, ~M~
