OddDom

Warning: Long post written from brain to text. If you have an issue with grammar or spelling, sod off. If you have an issue or comment regarding the topic, I warmly welcome your conversation.

When I started embracing more then my feelings and getting into the "scene," I did a lot of reading on the internet and then moved to munches. In Las Vegas the scene is very hush hush. This is caused by very strict laws. In Las Vegas, there are two groups, the Lifestylers and the Kinkesters. Kinksters were also often called the "Tickle Me Elmo Players." I took preference to the Lifestylers. The way I feel is that I am always dominant, and that the pleasure I find is in the submission a person gives to me. This introduction touches the two main points of this journal entry. The reason for this is to show interested people the way that I truly believe regarding aspects of the "Scene."

First off, BDSM is not a cure for social problems. It may be the means to the way, but not the cure all solution. Throughout high school and college I was a desperate "fanboy." My personality expelled me from all social groups and I was a loner. In the ill motivated search for companionship I would latch on to the first sign of interest and obsess upon a woman. This lead all the way up until I started embracing the fact that I am a dominate person. I find it odd and am still confused at why I had developed submissive and desperate coping mechanisms that obscured my true being. When I began learning more about what Ds is, I quickly started forming conclusions and beliefs in the way I approach this. My very first conclusion is the primary qualifying aspect of a dominate. A dominate person can only dominate if they submit. Intrinsic submission so that one can dominate their own life is absolutely required to be able to dominate extrinsically. By this realization I was able to change things about me and improve my life. On a scale of 1 to 10 on my development it is impossible for me to exceed a nine as there is always more to learn and develop, and at this time I am not near the nine, but I am far from the number one I was barely two years ago. So this shows how I used this revelation as a way to a change, and that Ds or BD or SM in itself is not the simple cure. If a person has social issues or relationship issues, using BDSM or Ds may offer more opportunities for ?hook ups,? but the use of it will solve nothing.

Secondly, what is domination? Does a dominate make a person submit? The simple answer for me is no. What makes me dominate someone, is the fact that they allow themselves to submit to me. In a few places now I have seen people that look for others that they can make to submit to them. Have they succeeded at something? Yes, they have made a person succomb by using deception and force to do something they did not intend to do. I have seen people prey on the weak, or look for an entry point into a person?s mind to leverage their way in. This is a destructive process. I have seen many people break from this, and lead a life of fear. This is the worse, but yet most common outcome. Though there are the few that I adore. There are some out there that have a strong enough resolution to be able to grow from such experiences. Though in this situation there is no eventual outcome that will not leave mental scars. So in conclusion on this matter, a Ds relationship is like any other relationship in the respects that each person chooses to respect and acknowledge the person in the way they want. If they are not doing this in the way they want, then the relationship is built upon coercion, and will be a constant task for the coercer to maintain. And more often than not eventually doubt will form in a relationship like this and it will be undermined.