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Triskelion

notyourdom

Female Submissive, 21
Male Submissive, 28, Ithaca, New York
Male Dominant, 22
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About notyourdom

I am experienced and know this life is not about one person using another. Both must want the same results in the end. This requires negotiations between the two before entering the relationship. And what is agreed to must be consen and safe to be done.
An initial meeting is to be sure the other person is what they said in their profile and emails. It is not for play and will normally be someplace public so if one is not what they said the other can easily leave.

I know a Ds relationship can not be forced on another. Also dominance and submission take place all the time and not just behind doors. Giving up control or taking control takes place at work and at home with family. You cant have multiple people all wanting something different and when only one thing can be done not everyone will be happy. What makes someone submissive or dominant is why they do it and not what they do.

Vanilla activities affect everyone and stop us from being 100 percent anything. All of us are both dominant and submissive. How much we identify as one or the other indicates if we say we are submissive slave or dominant master or switch.

I seek a submissive who can, with time and the proper trust, develop into my slave. When I find that someone I will want her to live with me.

?BDSM is not separate from vanilla life. ?What will you do if something happens to your partner? ?If you don't have a job, can you get one? ?You will have to make your own choices at times knowing people doesn't mean you have to be their partner. ?Yes you can do what your partner wants in your vanilla life. ?If you want to introduce your partner to others, do it as if they are a coworker. ?After all, you both are working together to make life better and possibly easier and more enjoyable. You can create a contract indicating how life together will hopefully be like. Nothing can always be controlled.

Reality is not easy.   Some people who read your profile will take you literally.   When's the last time you read your profile and asked did I really mean that.  If you say you want to be told everything you should do, does that mean you will not eat or drink without being told?  Tomorrow, try going 24 hours straight without eating or drinking?  There's so much humans do automatically.  Think about what living the way your profile says.  

If you think B D S M is going to be easy, you are in for a let dow.  It is not fun and game.  It can be the hardest partnership there is in the beginning.  However, if you put in the time and effort and remember you are a human first, it will lead to a happy and long lasting relationship.  

No matter what someone else says you have the right to say no.  That may not get you what you hoped but it can get you what you need.

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