mrandmrsb


MRandsweet Dominant Couple, 69, Monessen, Pennsylvania	MrandMrsMean Dominant Couple, 42, Outside Stockholm	MRandsubjb Female Submissive, 41, Augusta, Georgia

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	About mrandmrsb Update: The slave we took in last year did not work out and the experience has left Mrs B not interested for the time being. I am still looking to talk to and possibly meet with others. Please read all my journal entries, they tell a lot about us. Intelligent Dom/switch couple seeking men, women and couples. We are always together. With thirty years experience in the lifestyle comes some understanding. Race, age (as long as you're legal), and looks are not an indication of how sexy you are or whether or not you're a good submissive. Contact us if you're interested in getting to know us.

When I first entered the lifestyle, there was no internet. We gained entrance to the community through people we knew or were fortunate enough to meet. It was a relatively close knit community. Those entering the community or lifestyle were greeted by those who had been there for some time. They were offered assistance if needed and told that any questions they had would be answered.

I try to keep doing that. I send very brief notes introducing myself and offering to answer questions or help if I can. By doing this, I have met some great people and been able to give some encouragement and advice to others. It has overall been a good experience and I will continue doing it.

Most of the time my notes are ignored and go unanswered though. Sometimes I get an email back from someone saying I am too old, too male, too something. I wasn't aware that most of those things had anything to do with offering advice or helping.

The funniest replies come from those supposed Masters/Mistresses or Dom/mes that don't want me talking to their slaves or subs. As if they're afraid I'm trying to steal them away. Let me tell you something all you Dominant people out there...If you're any good at what you profess to be, nobody can take a sub/slave away from you; if you're not you won't be able to keep them anyhow.

I will keep sending out letters introducing myself and offering to answer questions and help those new to the lifestyle or new to the site. It is polite, it is courteous, and it is the right thing to do. If being polite, courteous, and doing the right thing offends you, my brief note is the least of your worries.

Playmate, Mentor, Teacher, Trainer...What do you need or want.

We are a married D/s couple that recently moved to Michigan from the New Orleans area and are now ready to start resuming our activities.

I have over thirty years experience in the lifestyle. In those years, I've developed a philosophy that I live by. It is very close to that of the one who mentored me as I entered the lifestyle at the age of 19. I enjoy the interaction between Dominant and submissive and enjoy sharing my knowledge and philosophy. I especially enjoy helping those new to the lifestyle find their way. I'm happy to share through email and chat, but am always open to meeting and working with the right people. I have mentored, trained and taught both Doms and subs.

My wife has been involved in the lifestyle for five years as my sub, but has recently found that she is curious about exploring her Dominant side, besides she could never submit to anyone but me.

We are anxious to chat with anyone, both singles and couples, interested, and look forward to meeting some. Please get in touch if you have any questions or are interested.

When I first became involved in the lifestyle, there was no internet. While I certainly appreciate that the internet has opened up for us the chance to chat and get to know each other, it has also become a substitute.

I have come to the conclusion that there are more cyberDoms and cybersubs than there are real ones. It is unfortunate that for far too many, the internet has become their reality.

For me, the internet is a means of comunication, not a substitute for life. You can't train a slave/sub over the internet. You can't be a Master from 5000 miles away. You can pretend to do both of those things and that's fine, if that's what you're in to.

For me, I want to use all of my senses when I interact with a sub/slave. I don't want to see their image, I want to see them. True sensuality, in my opinion, involves all five senses not just an electronic substitute for two of them.

Camming and cybering are the electronic version of hiding in the bathroom with your dad's playboy and jacking off. I'd like to think I've outgrown that.

I find it sad, after having talked to so many subs/slaves or having read their journal entries, to hear the way they are treated by supposed Dom/mes-Masters/Mistresses. Being dominant is not an excuse for being rude, mean, or cruel.

One thing I know about being a Master is this...Being a Master isn't about controlling others, nearly as much as its about controlling yourself. Acting with honor is the true test of any Master. It's not about who you can force to their knees, but those who will kneel before you willingly.

I spoke with someone that called themselves a submissive/slave last week. When I asked what they wanted, the gave the age old response (in one form another) "I want to do whatever you want me to do".

While there are Masters/Mistresses-Dom/mes that want to hear just that sort of reply, there are those of us that have been in the lifestyle more than a few months and recognize that response for what it is. It is either bullshit, or it is the response of a mindless sub/slave. I have no use for a sub/slave that will try to bullshit me and even less use for one that is mindless.

I spend enough of my life, as it is, with people that are trying to bullshit me, and even more time with people that lack a functioning brain. So I will not accept responses like:
   -I only want to do what you want me to do
   -I have no desire other than to please you
   -I have no limits
   -I will do anything you ask
   -or any of their equivalents

I want subs/slaves that know what they enjoy, what they are good at, and what they want to learn to be good at. I want subs/slaves that are imaginative and creative.
I want those that recognize their desire to submit and still are able to recognize their own wishes. If they have no wishes and desires of their own, what are they submitting?

I am not new to this. I have both a sub and a
slave that live in my home. I also have two
slaves that visit regularly. As a Master, part
of the thrill for me is taking them where they
have dreamed of going. They are more
pleasing to me because they are happy and content.

They take care of my desires, because theirs are met. I am served very well, better than those Masters that have to force submission
or force their subs/slaves to perform.

So while I am always willing to chat and
always looking to assist subs/slaves in
achieving their goals. It is important that they
know...If you're going to chat with me, don't
try to bullshit me and, for god's sake, turn on your brain before you log on to your computer.

I have been in the lifestyle for over thirty years. It has been a learning experience and an incredible journey. Over these years, I've probably seen, done, or tried everything imaginable. Over the course of those years, I've learned more about me than I have about subs/slaves. I have developed my own philosophy about the lifestyle or, at least, how it pertains to me. I thought I'd take a minute to share some of what I believe. (Disclaimer: What I am and how I live, works very well for me...but it may not be for everyone. To each his own.)

Over the years, I have been involved in several groups and clubs; I was even the Dungeon Master at a private dungeon for seven years. Now I prefer the quite of my own home. I enjoy the company of subs/slaves and a few Masters/Doms who think like me. While social groups are fine for many people, I prefer, at least on my time, to only keep company with people I enjoy. Unless you have 100% control over who joins the club or group, you can't have that. So I prefer to live a more reclusive life.

I have had the pleasure of training or assisting in the training of over fifty subs/slaves. For the most part that has been one of the highlights of my life. I am one that truly loves the time I spend with subs/slaves. True subs/slaves are the most remarkable people. They surrender themselves to another. It is an incredible act of strength and trust. I am yet to meet a Dom/Master with that type of strength, myself included. So it is no understatement when I say I have far more respect for subs/slaves than I do for Doms/Masters. (Having said that, I want to make it clear, that when I refer to subs/slaves and Doms/Masters, I'm talking about those that are true. There are a lot of fakes out there in both categories. And at least for now, that's all I need to say on that subject.)

So what is my philosophy regarding training a sub/slave? It is something done in steps and, unfortunately, the first and most important step is often skipped. The first step is knowing the one submitting. Submissives and slaves are first and foremost people; they have dreams, desires, wants, hopes and fears. So many Dominants forget those things and many submissives are afraid of their own dreams, hopes... And the wannabes think that being a submissive means not having to face and live-up to their own desires. The first thing I do is talk to prospective sub/slaves and the second thing I do is talk some more, and the third is talk even more. Some enjoy pain, some want a gentle touch directing them, some want to feel a bit of fear, and some want to feel utterly secure. Some want to devote their life to a Master, many want to feel the excitement of submitting only occasionally. They all have different dreams, hopes, desires... They are all different people and yet so many Doms/Masters have a one style training for any sub they take under their wing.

I train each sub according to their desires. That doesn't mean they're in control, it means they are submitting and I'm leading them where they want to go. It's their desire to submit, after all, that brings them to me. I get to enjoy them and their journey. They become the submissive they long to be and truly are. I don't try to make them in to something they?re not. You can't make an apple into a tulip. But with care you can turn a tulip bulb into a beautiful flower.

That's the basis of my philosophy. I am not restricting a sub/slave; I'm helping them grow. I've seen too many who had been ruined by Doms/Masters that wanted to mold them into something that they weren't. If you tried to turn an apple into a tulip, you'd probably end up with applesauce (does that sound like some of sub training you've heard about?). That's a common mistake made by Doms/Masters.

There are also a couple common mistakes made by subs/slaves. The first is they mistake being forced with submission. They are not the same thing. They both have a place in the bdsm lifestyle, but they are two very different things. I'm not into forced... (Fill in the blank).

The other mistake subs/slaves make is forgetting their own value. Never allow a Dom/Master to make you feel like you are less than they are. In truth, a Master is not a Master without a slave. Without a Master a slave can still serve. So it is the Master that needs the slave, not the other way around. Be honest and let a prospective Master know what you want, what you'll accept and what you find unacceptable. You can't be true to a Master if you haven't first been true to yourself.

This has gotten much longer than I initially planned and serves, I hope, as a better introduction. Feel free to contact me and share your ideas.

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mrandmrsb

About mrandmrsb