MissKai

I love getting hate-mail from entitled assholes who think that I'm obligated to coddle them when they ignore my profile, ignore what I'm looking for, and then get verbally abusive the very second I call them on it. First of all, thanks: you're proving to me that CollarMe is full of jerks who are too insecure and small-minded to handle being told "no thanks." Secondly, you're proving to me that men are pushy, sleazy bullies who can't handle rejection without resorting to verbal abuse which could easily escalate to physical violence--yeah, totally hot, I dig rapists, who doesn't. Thirdly, this is why I have an age cap: because you, douchebag who thought 42 was close enough to 35 to try, are exactly why I have an age cap. Because your entire generation is filled with self-centered, entitled pricks who are so insecure that they can't handle the fact that a woman has a right to reject them.

Jesus H Christ. This is precisely the sort of shit on a daily basis that made me leave CM before.

Ideal play partner: someone who doesn't mind being sensual, but isn't expecting anything sexual (if you're an asexual, bonus); smart, but not scared of goofing off; substance-free; within my preferred age range (18-35ish), bonus points if you're fit, toned, or a teddybear/cuddly (since I do rope, I wouldn't feel safe tying someone obese).

Here's the sort of thing I'd be looking for: we meet up for coffee/tea and a chat; I charm you with my wit and energy, you impress me with your broad range of intellectual interests and your propensity to help old ladies cross the street. We head to a public play venue; you're malleable without being a pushover, eager to please without being demanding. I kiss your hair and stroke your back after, while you curl up in my lap and catch your breath. We keep each other company until such a time as you find a stable Dom/me to take you in or until we decide we're no longer compatible, and part in a mature, no-drama manner as friends who respect each other and maintain a lingering fondness for what we shared.

Rinse, repeat.

Everyone has their personal preferences. That being said, I prefer a sub I actually have something in common with. Please be no older than about 35. I don't really understand why a man over 50 would bother to contact me, based on my profile, unless he was purely objectifying me for my age and gender. Not attractive.

If your profile says "I like girls that--" then I'll get no further reading it. On a purely semantic level, a girl is a woman below legal age and, in general, who has not even attained menarche. I sincerely hope you aren't intending to refer to girls literally.

And if you're referring to women, especially dominant women, as girls, then please don't be surprised that we might not believe you're genuine about the lifestyle.

I would adore the chance to play with an asexual sub/switch. I feel that sort of pure, emotional connection is something I could truly cherish right now.

I'm surprised more Dommes don't have an issue with the "forced feminization" or "sissy" kink. The entire premise is that by being put in women's clothes or underwear, a man becomes humiliated and feels less powerful.

Really?

There's a screwed-up anti-feminist message if I ever saw one. There is nothing intrinsically embarrassing, degrading, or disempowering about women's clothing. Nothing. And when you say you want to be a "slut", you're using a word which is used to police women's sexuality. You're using a word that's used to tell a woman how many sexual partners are appropriate. You're telling her what she should and shouldn't do with her body.

That's not respecting women. And if you don't respect women, you have no business submitting to them.

If your profile picture is a close-up of your genitals, I'm most likely not interested in speaking with you. There's something very misogynistic about putting your penis out there, as if every woman wants to be assaulted with the sight of your junk. It's rude, it's immature, and frankly, it's never as impressive as you seem to think it is.

Also, what is with men who claim to be subs putting up pictures that make them look like assholes? Delete that frat party picture, delete the one that has you posing with a Hooters waitress, and take a candid picture of yourself in natural light. If a woman decides she wants to see you naked or semi-naked, and she's actually a Domme, she will not be shy about asking. Personally, I would much rather see your face, your smile, your eyes. That tells me a lot more about you than a poorly-angled snapshot of your bound torso.

Seriously.

Respect yourself. And respect your potential Dominant.